Warnings: This Is Going To Be A Multi Part Series And It's Going To Be Angsty Cause I Am In My Feels.

Warnings: this is going to be a multi part series and it's going to be angsty cause I am in my feels. Female reader, Padmé and Anakin were together but had a healthy break up, Jedi reader so forbidden love.

This story takes plays in Clone Wars yet many events have been changed (like the meeting of Ashoka and Anakin... don't worry the sibling energy is still there.)

series masterlist

Anakin and I don't talk about his confession and what happened on the ship. From the moment we landed we were swooped from meeting after meeting. Jedi councils and strategy meetings while reporting about our mission. And in the midst of it all, we haven't been able to spend time with each other or even see each other.

As I walk from one room to another, speed walking in the halls, I feel an arm grab me and direct me behind a huge pillar, letting my back hit the cold marble.

Anakin's body is flushed with mine as his head lowers, leaning in for a kiss. I draw my head back, resting my forehead against his. “Not here,” I whisper.

“Yes, here.” He whispers as his nose rubs mine as he leans down again for a kiss. Again I do not let him, because I know that one kiss will lead to another and eventually our cover will be blown. “I am sorry Ani, I have to go,” I tell him as I slightly push him off me. I regret the motion the moment I make it but I should head to what hopefully will be the last meeting of the day.

“I miss you,” he says as he tries to casually lean against the pillar he backed me up earlier, but misses as he should have been closer. He stumbles, as I chuckle at him and he simply fires me a cocky smile as he finally manages to complete his smooth pose. And says to me “I guess you could say that I fell for you” with a cheeky smile, as I walk off.

Truly the meeting was a boring mess and couldn't pass any faster. And when it finally did, I headed back to my quarters and promptly fell onto my bed as Artoo came closer.

“What shall I do, Artoo?”

A beeping sound came as the answer to the question.

“About Ani. Why does it have to be him?”

Beep beep bop

“Of course, I love him but …. Truth is I am scared of what will happen.” We both stay silent for a while. I break the comfortable silence first. “I keep seeing these…visions. Where Ani has turned to the dark side…”

Bop beep boop boop

“Yeah, you are right. Ani would never do that but it still worries me. Thank you, Artoo. You are a good listener. That's why you are my best friend.” I say to him as sleep finally takes over.

A few hours later I am woken up by strong arms wrapping around my midriff and a cold nose being buried at the crook of my neck. Still half asleep I turn around in his arms letting our limbs tangle.

“You shouldn't be here. Threepio is going to miss you.” I lightly whisper as my fingers tangle in his hair and I slightly graze his scalp with my nails. He lets out a breathy chuckle as he whispers in my skin. “I would rather be here. I think Threepio can manage.”

Sleep finally finds us in each other's embrace. And that is exactly how I wake up several hours later. The various rays of sunshine that enter the room make him look ethereal as the sun hits his face just right and the shade of his hair seems lighter.

“You are staring.” He says in a sleepy, heavy voice and he peeks through his left eye at me.

“Too bad. Because I am quite fond of it.”

“Oh really?” He whispers as he draws me closer. We bask in each other's comfort for a while until we have to get up and head for our posts but for now, we let ourselves live in the possibility of what every morning could be like.

WARNINGS: this is quite angsty...no actual smut happens just a tiny scene. Also I messes around with some scenes so I feel like it doesn't follow the storyline in the series... that's about it... (should a do a part 2?) part 2 here, part 3

He was nursing a long drink of whiskey on ice as he stared at the blank wall. The year was 1963, and he was currently sitting on a lousy couch in Dallas. The apocalypse was going to take place once again mere days away. He felt bone tired, no one around him understood the stakes and the pressure he was under. He got out of his jacket a black and white photo. A young woman in her early twenties had a huge smile plastered on her face, her head was slightly cocked to the side and loose hair from the messy bun that rested at the top of her head framed her beautiful face. She seemed radiant, her eyes were crinkled from her smile and she seemed like a goddess to him. A piece of heaven that he left behind.

“Who's that?” Klaus whispered in his ear and Five jumped from the sudden sound and he glared at his brother. Out of all his siblings, Klaus was the only one who would understand him. “She is beautiful.”

“She is my wife.” Five said quietly. His voice was soft and colored in an emotion that Klaus couldn't recognize.

“Your what?”

“Are you deaf? I said she is my wife, or at least she was.”

“What happened?”

Five had been at the Commission for several years. After a failed experiment he had turned back to his twenty-year-old self. He had heard whispers of the Scarlet Angel all around him, everyone seemed to talk about his rival, especially in his presence. It was supposed to be the deadliest assassin of the Institution besides him. One gray day he was called into the Handlers office. That was when he saw her for the first time. A tall woman was seated on a chair, her beautiful face turned towards him as he entered the room. Five had never been one to find in someone's physical beauty but at the moment their eyes met he could swear that his heart skipped a beat.

Their first assignment together had been such a success, that they were stuck together permanently. Throughout the following years, Five found himself falling for her harder every day, with every word she said, with every laugh she caused from him, the way she always had his back and defended him whether she agreed with his actions or not. Their fights were the best thing that ever happened to him, she always found ways to leave him speechless, with her smart comebacks, the way she was animated when she got angry, her hands flew around her, her face got angry red and her hair bounced with her movements. He had never seen someone look so exquisite when they were yelling at him. She made him feel alive, adrenaline coursed in his veins. She always got the better of him. She was so… infuriating. On one of those occasions he finally had enough.

He grabbed her face and smashed their lips together to silence her. She was breathless when he distanced himself from her. Her eyes were wild and her hand flew to his cheeks, slapping him. Before leaving him frozen on his spot. They were supposed to be undercover as a married couple at the gala of their target. They had been discussing tactics and strategies when things escalated.

With a deep breath, he tried to calm himself down and headed back towards the ballroom, searching for his supposed wife. They stayed together all night, dancing and acting like a couple. It seemed natural to him to be this way with her. Having her in his arms, and showing her off. Finally a few minutes shy of dawn, they tiptoed towards a huge room where their target hid diamonds. Diamonds they were going to steal after killing him, so the crime would seem like a robbery gone wrong. Just at the last corner, they were almost caught. Five quickly hoisted her up before he pinned her to a wall and he placed his face on her neck. Her skin flashed and her heartbeat was rapid beneath his mouth.

“Play along.” He whispered sweetly to her skin but she was shocked by his actions. So he had no choice. He sucked at her pulse point receiving an immediate reaction. Her legs drew back on his hold, her back arched, her eyes closed and her lips released a quiet breathy moan. At that moment he knew he was already addicted to her. He couldn't hold himself back any longer. He bit and sucked on her neck and her hands tangled into his hair as she tugged at the short strands on the back of his head. She was moaning in his arms and her hips rolled against his. He raised his knee and she started riding his leg shamelessly. He wanted to be inside of her or he was going to burst. He wanted to shut her smart mouth so it would no longer fire comebacks at him. He unbuckled his belt and lowered his pants before pushing her underwear to the side and he waited for a confirmation to continue. She could ask him to kneel, to beg and he would gladly do so. Just to steal one moment with her.

A loud bang echoed through the walls and they snapped out of their daze. But the damage had already been done. Their partnership had been blown to proposition forever. And the rest was history.

Several years later, and many happy years together after being married in secret. It happened, their big bang, the thing that embodied the doom of their relationship. Five had always been a pessimist, even in his early childhood. He was a firm believer in Murphy's law, which stated that when something could go wrong in a situation, always expect it to go wrong. They had traveled in Germany during the Second World War. Five posed as one of the ranking officers in Auschwitz as his wife was expected to do the same. Only, she had been compromised and now she was one of the prisoners. The terrible labor that she endured every day was the thing that would plague him for years to come. After completing their mission and several wounds later they managed to get back to the safety of their home.

“Why didn't you listen to me?” Five snap in frustration and terror. His hands shook as he tried to stitch a big guss on her stomach. She looked paper thin, her bones were visible and her veins along with her arteries stood prominent against her pale skin that lost its color.

“I did. I disagreed with your plan either way. And we had to do something drastic. I took a risk and I lost. It happens.”

“And did it have to happen in one of the most terrifying places that ever existed on this Earth?”

“Snap out of it. You would have done the same. And always where we are atrocious things have happened. So you don't get to lecture me. I am my own person. I made a call and it happened to be wrong. But if I hadn't done that we would have eventually failed this mission. And you don't get to lecture me when you have done nothing but be untruthful to me since the moment this started.”

“Wh- what are you talking about?” Five whispered, his voice quivered with unshown emotions. He could see the inevitable impact between them before his eyes, he had just hoped he could have a few more moments with her. A few more minutes, a few more hours, days, or years. Anything really.

Her eyes were hard and full of hatred. She pulled herself to her feet. The pain that consumed her must have been blinding. The open wounds leaked with blood that stained her skin. She moved towards her coat where she retrieved a dark green notebook and she slammed it against their kitchen table, before placing her hands on her hips and firing a challenging look towards him.

“You know I want to get back to my family, sweetheart.”

“Don't sweetheart me. These equations are only for one person. So is there something you want to tell me, dear husband of mine?”

“Please let me explain…”

“Explain what? That this meant nothing to you? You are an egoistic son of a bitch Five. And I am done with you. And you know why? You made the mistake of placing a date when you started. Our wedding date. You have already shown your true colors. You can leave now. And you can take this, I don't need it any longer. Either way, it was fake and it meant nothing to you.” She said before throwing her wedding ring at him. It thudded against his chest and he caught it mid-air, as he watched her walking away from him and slamming the door of their bedroom in her way. He stood frozen in his place. It was done. The one thing that made him feel alive, the one thing that made him happy left him. He lost it under his own hands. The same night, he left a letter behind him before he traveled back in time, back to his family. To them, he seemed a shy seven years older than when he disappeared. But they didn't know about the two things he carried with him from his last life. Her picture in the breast pocket of his smart jacket and her wedding ring on his collarbones as it hung from a golden chain, both hidden from the world.

“Five. That is just … I don't know what to say.”

“Then don't. It is already hard to think about her.”

“How long has it been since -”

“Six years, eight months and twenty days. My early attempts to get back to you weren't really successful.” He whispered as he toying with her ring. It was gold and smooth to touch, his name had been engraved on the inside. It had been a blast to convince the person who made them that his name was actually Five. And he smiled at the fond memory.

“Will you ever see her again?”

“I don't know. The selfish part of me wishes that, but another part of me knows that it is better this way. Because she is free and safe from me. Klaus, if you don't mind … no more talk please.”

Klaus looked at the pained expression on his brother's face. He had never heard him utter the world “please”, at least not to him. So he simply nodded and stayed with him in silence before their peace was disturbed by their reality.

words: 1.781

My lips. Your lips. Apocalypse.

Warnings: my shit writing, violence (kinda?)

part 2

I will be the first person to say it. School is boring. And that is a lot since Nevermore is no ordinary school. The only class that is interesting, yet exhausting, is this one. Mrs Smith is sitting across from me. Staring intensely in my eyes, trying to find the weak spot in my mental shield. We have been at it for hours and I have managed to preserve my resolve. Until now. She finally breaks in.

"So what is it about you? You seem quite ordinary to be going to that school." The cute Barnstaple across from me asks. He has nice brown hair that curls at his ears. Deep thoughtful eyes. He is mundane or better yet, ordinary, as he called me. He is perfect. But something about him screams certain danger. Tyler, Tyler Galpin, whom I have come to know as my best friend. My dreamy best friend, who I moon over day and night and constantly plagues my thoughts.

"That is top secret agent type of shit, you can not know" I answered him with a chuckle.

The memory soon fades, as fast as it appeared. I feel my shoulders sag from exhaustion and I try to find sense in the safety of my magical pendant. The one that keeps others at bay while also containing my powers. The one that keeps me safe not only from others but also from myself. Mind control is not easy stuff, you have to be hyperfocus. Do you want to control something or someone? You have to draw all your willpower and pour it into that task. Which is tough shit. Making someone forget or simply reading their thoughts or memories, even manipulating them is now as natural as breathing. Shielding yourself from others with the same powers is the hardest. There aren't many of us but we are more powerful than anyone else. So if you slip up, you are vulnerable to the world.

You know what they say. With great power comes great responsibility.

My ears are ringing. My mind is reeling. Each breath I take feels like hell. They are uneven, torturous and slow

"Drink this" I feel a cold water bottle touch my bottom lip. I drink the offered water greedily. My vision from hazy slowly starts turning itself clear and I can make out my surroundings again. "Better?" I nod and wait for the lecture to start. "So your shield lasted over two hours. You are strong, you know that, but you can not let yourself get lost in your daydreams. Especially when we are practising ".

"Yeah I know, I know" I heave, still trying to stabilize my breathing.

"Go rest"

I get up slowly. Unsteady on my feet and wandering through the halls while feeling my way in the walls, trailing my fingertips in the cold stoned wall. I enter my dorm and change out of my uniform. Putting on a white oversized shirt, half buttoned and collapsing in my bed.

The hours pass as I am in a half-awake state. Being aware of the room around me, but my organism turns to its usual state. And so I dream. I dream of him. What it would be like to kiss. What it would be like to date.

I am startled awake as my roommate slams the door behind her wake. Wednesday in her usual lack of colour stops in the middle of the room and sharply looks at me. "Good, you are awake".

I sigh rolling my eyes "What do you want?"

"I am going to the house I was telling you about. I might need your help."

"Why?"

"Because you are useful."

"Jee thanks. It feels good to be appreciated. "

The sun has finally set and we walk towards the school's entrance door, where a familiar Jeep awaits. Tyler, he is here. Enid and Wednesday are wearing their matching hoodie scarf things, as usual, I am left out. As usual, Wednesday climbs in the passenger seat, my seat, and Tyler doesn't say a word about that, instead, he flirts with her. He doesn't even greet me or ask about my day, as he used to.

I silently seeth as we arrive at what looks like a haunted manor. We break in and we start wandering through the house trying to find evidence. At some point, we are separated. As I walk into what looks like an old girl's bedroom, I feel a presence behind me, the hair on my neck standing as I grab the nearest object ready to attack.

Yet a strong hand shoots out and stops my blow easily. "Hey there. Be careful, Rockey, you wouldn't want to hit me, now would you?" The breath is knocked out of me. The moonlight hits him just right, highlighting his features, the soft smile, the high cheekbones and sharp jawline. His laughing face turns into one of confusion. He opens his mouth ready to ask me something, when a strange sound echoes through the room.

He grabs me and flushes me to his chest. He places his hand to my mouth and I feel my heart race. I can feel every plain of his body against mine. His defined chest rises and falls in a crazy rhythm, and his hands hold me in place with urgency. We must stay like this for a few seconds or mere minutes but it feels like hours as I try to catalog his characteristics.

"I will go check, it must have been the girls, please stay here."

"What? No, I am coming with you."

"Please." He uses that voice. The one he knows that can convince me to do anything.

So I stay put. Until I see a light shining into the forest. I find myself following it. Threading through the trees and the fallen leaves. Someone moves just out of sight. A knife is thrown my way and I drop to the ground. The figure stalks towards me and as I think that I am doomed. The Hyde makes its appearance, attacking what I assumed to be a man, tiring him to shreds. After it's done it turns my way, snuffing the air as I am frozen in place, terrified to the bone.

The sound of bones breaking fills the air as the monster in front of me turns into a … boy? A familiar one. He is covered in blood and unconscious. I make a quick decision and drag him towards his house, cleaning him up in his bathtub and stitching up the scratch wound on his pecs. Tyler is the Hyde. The Hyde is Tyler. They are one and the same.

I am watching him, studying him while he sleeps. He looks so peaceful yet troubled. I creep towards his father's room and find some handcuffs, thank you Sheriff Galpin, and tie him up in his headboard, waiting till he awakes.

words: 1.154 (there will be a pt.2.... propably?)

Warnings: this is going to be a multi part series and it's going to be angsty cause I am in my feels. Female reader, Padmé and Anakin were together but had a healthy break up, Jedi reader so forbidden love.

This story takes plays in Clone Wars yet many events have been changed (like the meeting of Ashoka and Anakin... don't worry the sibling energy is still there.)

series masterlist

The following days are being wasted on boring meetings and tedious training sessions. The only upside is that Ashoka is improving by the day soon she will make it to Commander. And even if we are not allowed to feel anything towards our Jedi companions, I can't help but feel immensely proud for her as she buskes under Anakin's care despite their constant never-ending bickering, as amusing as it is, it can get quite annoying.

I sit cross-legged on the ledge of my window as I nurse a cup of hot chocolate (the one with milk and not that water-based drink that people think is hot chocolate) and one of the remaining five tiny marshmallows floats at the surface. I close my eyes as my body relaxes and my mind floats in an avast nothingness. My energy and my power pours into the Force and I let my essence be tossed around for a while, enjoying the weight that lifted off my shoulders. Then I harness it and bend it to my will as I was taught to do the last few years. At first, it used to be so hard that I spent numerous nights crying myself to sleep because of my inability to control such a huge force of power. But it is as easy as breathing, sometimes if I let my mind slip I do it without my knowledge.

I don't know how long I sit there lost in my play with the Force as the sun's rays warm my body from the inside. I can feel my face heating up from its exposure to the sun and I welcome it with open arms. The hot chocolate that I carefully cradle in my arms has now turned cold as someone is hugging me from behind. His essence is so recognisable in Force to me as the sky is blue. He gently sets his chin at the top of my head and we sit quietly there.

Our peace though is short-lived as our beepers go off like crazy and with great reluctance, we part as Anakin answers his. As a message floats in the air. Help is needed in Tatooine. The Empire plans to strike the civilians. We change in our armours in silence as we walk towards Ani's space shuttle, one that he hasn't crashed yet, as fast as possible and we find Artoo already in his seat and Ashoka turning on the engines. In a few short minutes, we are good to go and enter at lightspeed hoping to get there before it's too late.

We sit quietly as we both stare at the blurry stars and I chuckle as I hear a soft snore coming from behind me. I slightly turn my head and I catch with the edge of my eye Ashoka as she is huddled in a corner covered with multiple blankets. I turn to look at Anakin, who sniggers under his breath as he stares at her with love and devotion as much as fierce protectiveness. I admire him, his unguarded expression and the clear enjoyment sparks in his eyes.

“How are you feeling?” I whisper, hating to break this light atmosphere.

“About what?” he asks slowly, playing to be dumb but unfortunately for him, two can play this game.

“About that racing match? I think I should bet on the Velvet Thunder.” I say to him deadpanned.

“Oh well, I was thinking that the Purple Stars have a better chance at winning this time.” He says playing along and I hum as I stare at him waiting for his resolve to break.

“I don't know what you want me to say.”

“Just your thoughts or your feelings it used to be your home, Ani -”

“It never was.”

“ - And there are innocent people -

“More like slave makers!”

“ - who are in danger. I know that it was hard Ani. I get it but think of those people who are enslaved and can't protect themselves -”

“That's a bit much because they always made my life a living hell.”

“ - or your family.”

At that, he finally falls silent and he says under his breath. “They never were my family. They always thought I was bad news and that I was the black sheep of the family. The only family I had, lays now cold in the ground. The Empire can extinct them all for all I care.”

“You don't mean that”

“What if I do? Would you be scared of me? Or draw away? Just like the others? Because they can't face the Chosen One?” He says bitterly.

“I would never leave you. You know that. And I also know that you might think that you want that but you don't actually want it to happen. Because if you did you wouldn't have made it this far.”

“Sometimes I think … I lose myself in bad thoughts, in my anger, my envy , in my …. in my pain. And then you come along and you pull my right back. How do you do that? How do you know?”

I am startled by his admission and it hits a bit to close at home as flushes of images from those wretched dreams fill my head. The ones were Anakins lovely blue eyes have turned to an angry yellow and are slit apart by a blank line. Or the ones where his robes, long and dark as the midnight sky are slightly burned and his hand holds a bright red lightsaber. All the visions have been dark and twisted in their own independent way, haunting me for weeks as they include post apocalyptic sceneries and a mass destruction of the world as we know it. And in the middle of it all stands none other but sweet Ani. I haven't told anyone about those disturbing dreams, thinking that it was a cruel move by the stars for defining the rules and the Jedi code for forbidden love. But the feel more profeting that anything else. A glimpse of the future or a possible, alternating future if I had my say in it. A chill slide down my spine at the idea of actually losing Ani. And I make a reckless decision. I could stop it, no matter what the price… couldn't I?

“She would have been proud of you, you know. Of the man you have become.” I say to him, my mind made up and so help me gods I will see it done. Anything to keep him safe. Somewhere above I can hear the stars, fate or whatever Force laugh at me but if I have to I will tire then from the sky for him.

“How do you know?” He asks suddenly shy as his insecurities take of his usually cool demeanour. And I smile softly at him cupping his jaw saying “Because I am.” And kissing him lightly on his lips, once again hopeful because there might be a chance to keep him safe.

A big jolt rattles the ship as we exit lightspeed and Anakin sucks a deep breath focusing on piloting once again. And a sleepy “What? I wasn't sleeping…” sounds from the back of my seat and a fond smile capture my face as I relax myself in my seat, preparing for the upcoming battle.

words:1.217

Request: Remus Lupin x fem!reader

Plot: Remus and reader studying together while she sits on his lap, but she realizes she wants him and grinds on him while he tries to work

WARNINGS: smut, shy insecure Reader, Remus helping in his unique way ....

I changed the plot a little bit ...

The soft sound of the needle scratching the vinyl filled the room. All the songs have come to an end and Remus and I didn't even notice we had been too engrossed in our studies. Or more likely he was and I was simply staring at him. He was scrunching up his nose and poking his tongue out every time he tried to understand something. He seemed good and happy. That was when you decided to attack him. You quickly climbed over him and straddled his lap, before placing kisses on his neck.

For god’s sake, he thought. You looked so beautiful taking charge of him and making him writhe like this. This wasn't something that he would usually indulge in but if it meant that you would kiss him senseless and drive the breath clean out of him he was all in. You didn’t usually climb on top of your boyfriend to attack him with senseless kisses of your own accord, usually, it was the opposite. It was a magnificent change for him, one he welcomed with open arms.

“Whoa,” Remus took a sharp breath, wrapping an arm around your waist as you bucked your hips against him. “Dove, may I ask what …. what brought this—ah—on?”

“No, not really” you muttered against his collarbones as you grabbed his loosened tie to crush your lips to his. You knew that your newfound confidence and control wouldn't last long, Remus would quickly seek a way to turn things around.

“You’re going to be the death— of me.” Remus stuttered, feeling sweat lining all over his body. you were a vixen under the guise of a proper girl. He supposed he already knew that but tonight drove the fact home. If he were, to be honest, to be honest, he liked you this way better. Your sailor's mouth and timid confidence were facts about you that he only seemed to know. He felt powerful that way because he could keep you from the world.

He was a mess of swollen lips, heavily panting under your hands. And Godrick, now you were trailing sloppy kisses down his chest, and then too near to his crotch, that had been his last straw before grabbing your hips in a tight hold, turning you around, and spreading your legs. He positioned one of his thighs, letting you rest your wait there as you started moving back and forth. He stilled you with a commanding hand.

“How about a game? You answer my questions correctly, you get fucked like the good girl I know you are. Otherwise …” He let his voice fade and you were tempted to answer one of his questions wrong, just for the fun of it. Just to see how far he could go this time. He would never hurt you, not really. He was too much of a sweetheart for that.

“What if I don't want to, Professor?” You said with a sultry voice. And he playfully rolled his eyes at you.

“Do not tease me, you minx.” He said in your ear before bouncing his leg harshly, and a gasp let you at the sudden movement and pressure in your clit. “Now let's start shall we?”

You nodded so fast that you knocked the back of your head to his nose. Every time you answered correctly he rubbed your clit in harsh tight circles. Every time you answered wrong he bounced his leg while he kept you in place. Your head had been working overtime to try to even think of an answer without even caring about its correctness. Either way, the pleasure you got from simply answering was more than enough to drive you crazy.

Your head had been spinning once he stopped moving. His voice didn't sound any longer, the only sound that sounded in the room was your heavy labored breathing. He placed a sweet kiss on your pulse point before he turned you around once again. A wicked grin was plastered on his face as he slipped inside of you. You haven't even registered the sound of him lowering his pants. Your legs wrapped around his chair as an anchor, his thrusts were so hard and so deed that you bounced with their force, and your hips were pressed flush against his. He buried his head into your chest, feeling your racing heartbeat as your softness enveloped him in more places than one. All thoughts about his friends burging into the room flew out of his head as his whole world redacted into you.

Stuttered breathing reached his ears as your muffled voice called out to him to stop, to never stop, and muttered his name with colorful names. He absolutely loved it when you lost control and cursed him for what he did to you. No one would know that his sweet girl loved to be fucked harshly to the point where youwas nothing but his fuck toy. Without warning you fell over the edge and he tried to remove his head from your embrace to admire your beauty. Your cheeks were flushed and tears slipped from your eyes as he came inside of you.

He pressed kisses on your forehead trying to calm you down, gathered into his arms. He was still deep inside of you and you rolled your hips against his. What you were trying to chase he didn't know, but he let you, curiosity got the best of him. Soon he was hard inside you again but he collected all of his willpower to let you take charge you had earned it. You whined his name pathetically, begging him to please just fuck you. He felt cruel and maybe he was, but you had to start claiming what you deserved without his help, even from him.

You got the hang of it pretty quickly and he was glad to praise his smart girl. Your legs were quivering around him, barely able to keep your weight. Just when they were about to give out he grabbed the back of your thighs helping you lift your weight but doing nothing else. He was leaking inside of you, you were doing the best job and he told you as much. A few minutes after you both tipped over the edge and this time he removed himself from you and positioned you back on his thigh. Without missing a beat you started riding his leg and he felt his eyes roll to the back of his head. It was going to be a long night for the two of you, he knew that because from the moments you looked at him with those eyes and with that pout on your lips, he was unapologetically wrapped around your finger.

words: a little of over 1.100

Nerves and Stolen Kisses

I have been toying with the idea of writing a fic about him for quite sometime and after last weekend I just had to. Estelle ( Ollie's rumoured gf is mentioned here but it is a fake relationship for PR reasons.) Also Paul Aron has a gf... friends to lovers trope.

Shoutout to @httpiastri for the inspiration

The Saudi Arabian Grand Prix was fast approaching. And Ollie was a jumble of nerves and excitement as usual. Since the early hour of the day, he opened the curtains letting the sun into the room and you groaned into the pillow.

“Wakey wakey, sleepyhead. Come on, we have a whole day ahead of us.”

“No, you do. I don't know why I came.”

“Because I am your bestest friend and I paid for your ticket and let you stay with me.”

“Both of which are for your benefit.”

“Come on….”

“Fine.” You say with a dejected sigh as you get up and you both get ready for the day. David, Ollie's dad was already waiting for you and you headed towards the paddock.

Everything was a frenzy and was passing by so quickly. As Ollie got into the garage and got ready for the quali you headed towards the stands trying to find Cassie, Paul's long-term girlfriend. Throughout the years you have formed a unique friendship. She was the only one who knew about your crush on Ollie and she teased you endlessly about it. Ollie and you had been best friends for the better part of your life, joint to the hip, having endless sleepovers, even if Dad didn't approve.

It was an endless nightmare being close enough to get a taste of all the what ifs, but never experiencing them.

“Do you and your lover boy share a room, huh?”

“It's not like that and you know it, Cassandra.”

“Yeah, it hurts, doesn't it?”

“So much. You have no idea. Yesterday I couldn't sleep and as the hours passed, he came closer and closer. He ended up holding me in his sleep. And I felt so bad because of Estelle. I know that they aren't really together and it's for PR, but still, I feel awful because technically I am the other woman… and she is just so nice and sweet. Never overstepping, I think she knows.”

We both stay quiet after that as the session continues.

“You know… whatever the case. You both love each other, platonically or not.”

“Yeah, I know.” I say as I watch the times set by all the drivers, Ollie having the fastest one yet.

“Looks like your man is on pole.”

We both make our way through the paddock, trying to pass the roaring sea of fans and we hand out already-signed autographs to anyone who asks for them. When we finally arrive, we part ways, before making promises about having dinner together at a restaurant Cassie wanted to try. And I head towards the Prema garage finding two beaming Bearmans, hugging.

“Hey Bear. Did you drive fast enough?” You call at him. And he grins like an idiot before swooping you into a tight hug spinning you. His laughter echoes in your ears as he sets you down.

“Yeah I drove fast enough, you minx.”

“Good. Now let's go. We are having dinner with Paul and Cassie in four hours and I want to see the city.”

“Give me five minutes to change and we are good to go.”

The afternoon is spent visiting local stores, trying to communicate in scrappy English and making terrible puns with products or street names. When they finally head to the restaurant their sides hurt from laughing. Dinner passed by as quickly as it came. As everyone says, time flies by when you are with the people you love.

Just as they open the door for their hotel room, Ollie flops in the bed as you head towards your computer and open it as hoards of emails and messages appear on the screen. Great more deadlines and essays to write until the end of the week.

“Leave it. We can pretend that we have nothing to do and watch a movie or local TV and try to understand what the hell is going on.”

“Thanks Bear. But I can't, as tempting as your offer is. Go to sleep, I will join you soon.”

And so you sit in front of your computer, ending essay after essay, sending them on time, until your eyes hurt from the pale blue light. The bed seems more welcoming than ever before as Ollie starfishes the entire length of it and his soft snores fill the empty space. Yeah, maybe it's time to call it a day.

An awful sound echoes in the room and eventually wakes you.

“I swear if it's one more ad I will jump from the window.” You grumble into your pillow as you steal the blankets and turn yourself into a burrito.

Ollie hisses as he opens his phone only to find a ton of messages and many missed calls from Ferrari. He dials Fred back as he moves towards the bathroom, trying to let you steal a few more minutes of much needed sleep.

When he emerges back in the room he sits down in front of you, his back supported on the bed.

“Ols, what's going on?”

“Carlos has an appendix”

“Oh no. Is he having surgery?”

“Yeah.” He says softly. “They want me to replace him.”

“What?” At that you are fully awake. Your hair is a netted nest and you look at him in shock. He looks at you, you his best friend who would look like a mess to anyone else but to him you look like the most beautiful and amazing creature in the world. Your mere presence has a more calming effect on him than anything else. If it weren't for you, he would have already lost his mind. “How? When? I…”

“We need to get to the paddock, if I don't want to miss FP3. I will wake up Dad and break the news to him.”

Soon after you enter the paddock and thousands of reporters try to get a better look at Ollie, flashing their cameras at you and bombarding you with questions as you make your way to the Ferrari garage and mechanics steal Ollie from you and David as they set to work quickly. David looks pale and sick as he paces into the garage trying to control his nerves through the FP3 and the Quali. When Ollie finally got off the car when he scored the 11th place, missing Q2 only by 3 hundreds of a second, you knew that this was it. He was finally shining like the bright star he was. He had done more than enough, his raw talent showing with barely one hour to get used to the car. And as mechanics and reporters closed around him. You couldn't help but feel like you didn't belong here. Where did you fit in? The reality hit you and it hit you hard. You hid in the back corners of the garage, eyes glued to the screen as everyone passed by without acknowledging you. You would happily hide in the shadows where he shined but this world wasn't meant for you. The anxiety was picking up at you, eating you alive from the inside.

And when Ollie got too close to the wall, your heart stopped beating. He was driving a car that was twice as fast and twice as dangerous than his normal F2 car. It was too much. The sound, the danger, everything really. Breathing suddenly seemed so hard and you needed a way out. As you hide behind the garage you call the one person who could understand. Terri picks up in the second ring her soft voice already calming you.

“Hey love. Is everything alright?”

“How do you do it? How can you stand back and do nothing?”

“You love him, don't you sweetheart?”

“I thought it was obvious.”

“Well … no I always hoped but… whatever the case, to answer your question you simply do it, you just have to. A driver needs his support system and you are it for him. You are his forever person, whether that is romantically or not. He needs to be near you and as much nervous as you are, so is he. Without you he would be lost, believe me I know my son. And I can bet you that as much as your heart breaks right now, you are also immensely proud.”

“Of course I am. But where do I fit in, in this world.”

“Right beside him, love.”

“Thanks Terri. Please call David. I think he is losing his mind and he is sick with worry.” You say chuckling before saying your goodbyes and head back towards the garage. The session is already over and Ollie is nowhere in sight.

Ollie plays with the power button of his phone trying to calm down but to no avail. The lock screen is a photo of the two of you. It was last summer both your skins flushed and hair slightly wet and tangled. You both smile at the camera and your eyes look bright with happiness. He feels slightly lighter but he knows that there is an impending panic attack and so he turns to the one person who could help him in this situation.

"I got your text," you say, tiptoeing inside and shutting the door behind you, careful to not make any loud sounds to scare him. "How are you doing?”

Ollie is sitting on a massaging table, elbows on top of his legs and head resting in his hands. His eyes are stuck on the floor, his silence is defeaning. When he still doesn't answer, your heart rate picks up. Is something really wrong?

You make your way over to him, hands finding his cheeks and softly tilting him up to look at you – and you swear you've never seen him look this wrecked before. Not after his worst crashes, not when he lost the rookie championship last year, not when he was cheated out from the Formula 3 championship. Once again, you've entered completely new territory, and your heart breaks at the sight.

"Ollie, talk to me," you plead, holding back the tears that starts to form on your eyes and threatento spill. It's so painful to look into his eyes, but you can't back down. Not now, not when he needs you this much.

"I'm-" his voice cracks but he shakes his head, clearing his throat. "I'm so nervous, I don't know what to do."

It's like he's oozing anxiety, and his heavy sigh is like a stab in your chest. Ollie, your usually so calm and collected best friend is probably going crazy over this – you know him well enough by now to understand that he's definitely freaking out even more on the inside than what he shows or tells. He is a messy jumble of nerves.

"I get that. One hundred per cent. But.." your thumbs begin to stroke over the skin of his cheeks, along his jaw, and then finally across his eyebrows, to which his eyes flutter closed. "This is your dream. It's been your dream since forever, and now you finally have the chance.”

"And it's not just any car, it's a Ferrari. Do you realize how cool that is? Do you realize how many people would kill for an opportunity like this?" You smile at the sight of him with his eyes still shut, eyelashes resting atop his cheeks, messy fringe covering his forehead. Even like this, at his most stressed state, he's completely gorgeous, not that you would ever tell him that. "You would've killed for an opportunity like this just 24 hours ago."

"But what if I ruin it?" His voice is barely above a whisper when he speaks, shoulders slumping forward. "What if I go out there and I'm shit, and then they realize what a big mistake they've made by even putting me in the academy? What if-"

"It won't happen." His eyelids slowly open and he looks up at you, seemingly not even the slightest upset that you cut him off. "You're too good to do that. You'll get in that car and it will feel like your second home, just like it always does."

Finally, a small smile makes its way onto his lips. It's only been a few minutes since you came in, but he seems much more relaxed now, leaning into your touch completely. "I'll try my best to make you proud."

“I'm always proud of you, you mufflehead.”

A laugh bubbles from his chest and he stands up from the table, opening his arms wide and pulling you in for a tight hug. His heart is still beating louder than a drum in his chest when your ear is pressed up against it, and you're almost worried it will jump out any second now. But his breaths are much more controlled now, and his mind seems much lighter. And soon enough his heartbeat slows to normal.

“I bet that in twenty four hours not only will you finish the race, you will score points and beat Max Verstappen.”

“Let's not get ahead of ourselves” he says chuckling. “God, my neck is killing me.”

“Sit down. I've got you.” And so you start massaging his neck. It's stiff and hard under your hands and he lets a small groan as you untangle one of the knots that were quite painful. After a few minutes he is putty in your hands, his eyes closed, trusting you completely and feeling at ease for the first time in the past two days.

True to your world, Ollie crosses the finish line in seventh place, having gained points in his debut. But the one thing that kept him calm through the process was the thought that she was waiting for him in the cool down room. When the race finishes and drives the car back home he jumps from his seat and he can't get fast enough to her. People around him are praising him and congratulating him but they all fall to deaf eyes.

When he finally gets into the room to change into new fireproofs, she is patiently waiting for him. Her eyes are a little misty and her face flushed.

“I told you.”

“I didn't beat Max.”

“Still.”

She closes in on him and her hands are thrown around his neck, he reciprocates the hug immediately as his heart beat finally slows down. They doth draw away after a while only for him to dive back into her and kiss her firmly on the lips. Shock petrifies her and when he stops, he places his forehead on top of hers. He is a flustered mess and he is mumbling apologies, before she reconnects their lips.

For the following hours Ollie sports a shit-eating grin on his face. Everyone thinks that it is because of his amazing performance and not for kissing the girl that held his heart captive since they were five years old.