julesiuile

Julia

salt air and the rust on your doorwas a faerie in another lifeshe/they

807 posts

The Pause

I am going to introduce you to this dynamic, that I would very much like you to consider: The Pause.

Karen taught Nancy about The Pause when she was ten because she suspected Nancy was going through a hard time at school. The Pause was half a little game, half a trust promise. The rules were simple: The Pause would start when they lifted both feet from the ground. When they did that, Karen explained, time stopped for them to take out of their chests whatever was bugging them, and as long as the game was going on, they could say anything (even swearing!) to feel better, and after The Pause finished (when their feet were on the ground again), whatever they said during that time will not ever be approached again. No judgment, no hard felings. Just release.

Nancy had The Pause present during all her life, because speaking her mind wasn't always easy. She would learn soon enough that speaking up wasn't the hard part; getting heard was.

Anyway, she found herself spreading The Pause. She used it with Mike once or twice. During those moments, Nancy recalled, it was when they got along better. Sad thing they never talked about it later.

Mike had taught The Pause to Lucas, who eventually, taught it to Max in an attempt to talk to her when she was at her worst.

Nancy used it with Steve after their first encounter with the demogorgon, and it was, by far, the one who was most affected by The Pause. She had been at Steve's a few times by then. She knew he didn't have anyone to talk to about his feelings, or what he had gone through, so she taught him The Pause.

That was when Steve fell in love with her.

Then she taught The Pause to Jonathan in Murray's place, and that's when they both learned about their true feelings.

Later on, he would use The Pause with Will, who, a few years later, taught it to El.

Steve taught The Pause to several people, though. The first time he used it, it was before the Snow Ball. He wasn't expecting Claudia mentioning his dad, and everything went downhill from that. They sat in the bed before doing his hair, and they talked about shitty dads, and unrequited crushes with the same girl.

That was the second time Steve fell in love using The Pause.

The next summer, in camp, right before confessing to Suzie, Dustin used The Pause, which gave him strength to do so. Suzie found it cute enough to actually give him his first kiss.

When they first started working in Family Video, Steve learned that maybe Nancy's legacy was the best thing he got from her. He sat on the counter a lazy day and told Robin about The Pause when he saw her weirded than normal, and she obliged and told about her identity issues. She also mentioned that the weirdest thing about that is the fact that she was starting to believe that Steve Harrington was his platonic soulmate, and she was afraid to tell him because he might break her heart if he didn't feel the same.

That was the third time.

Steve taught The Pause once more, to Eddie. They sat on his kitchen countertop, and there was a whole space between them, when Eddie told that he couldn't believe that he actually was ready to die, and he didn't know what to do with that now that he didn't. Eddie told him that he was scared that he'd gave up his place in the world, and now the world wouldn't give his spot back. Eddie told him that he was as afraid to leave as he was to stay in Hawkins, because he was starting to believe that he was falling in love with this hot jackass that was making him using a communication system that implied that they were not going to talk about it anymore in the future.

Steve broke The Pause to walk the space between them and kiss him, because those feelings were not meant to be approached just once in theit life. He needed them to be real, so he could say Steve that he loved him for the rest of his life.

That was the fourth, and the last time he fell in love using The Pause.

Funny thing is, The Pause was now a secret dynamic that everyone in the group knew, but Nancy wasn't aware by that, until The Pause came back to her.

And it came from Robin.

Robin taught Nancy The Pause when they run accidentally into each other a random night in a park, in late 1986. Robin knew something was wrong with her, so she took her to the swings and asked her to lift her feet from the ground. Then, Robin explained Nancy The Pause rules, who listened attentively, not fully believing what was happening. She considered to come clean and tell Robin that she knew about The Pause, that her mom taught her when she was a kid, but she left that unsaid. Instead, Nancy talked about how she felt that her relationship with Jonathan was going nowhere, and she was afraid that they were making each other miserable. She also told Robin about that she might have developed feelings towards another person. Towards a girl. Robin told her that she liked girls, too. Nancy told Robin that she was scared about that part of herself. Robin said that she got it, but it wasn't that scary once you surrounded yourself with the right people.

They held hands there.

That was the first time Nancy fell in love using The Pause.

The Pause

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