I Crack Myself Up

i crack myself up

deadass if they kill off Eddie OR/AND Steve I’m actually suing

what it would be like dating brad pitt

author’s note: not a super long list but lmk if you want a part 2🫡 there’s also a lil bit of smutty stuff on the list, so beware

•he loves teasing you about everything

•like you two roast each other all day but it's all with love

•always apologizing profusely after roasting you (while laughing his ass off)

•speaking of ass, brad is an ass man and no one can change my mind

•loves just walking by you and *slap*

• "ow, what the fuck brad!"

•he spoils you way too much

•this man fucking WORSHIPS YOU

•if you ever happen to say "hey, wish I had this" fucker will write that shit down and get it for you

•long walks around L.A

•dude is cocky asf

•aggressively competitive pool/poker games with some serious sexual tension between you two

•calls you darlin😩

•he's also lowkey kind of a stoner so of course there's gonna be some epic smoke seshes

•(or if it's not your thing then he smokes outside away from you)

•loves, and I mean LOVES just listening to you talk

•like sometimes he doesn't even pay attention to what you're saying, he just loves your voice

•mans is packin👀

•you don't get into a lot of fights but when there is one it's usually very mature

•unless he's jealous, then it's batshit crazy and it almost always ends in make-up sex

•gets you flowers all the time🫶

•so many spontaneous dates

•this man thinks you’re absolutely perfect in every way, and will do anything and everything to show you just how much you mean to him🥹

sorry if that sucked<3 have an awesome day

mr steal your girl x3

😏 *tucks hair behind ear*

ouch, my heart just imploded🥹

This is the sweetest thing I’ve ever seen.

Credit to: @archivebutler on Twitter