Hey Um What. What Goddamn Business Did Omashu Have Having A King?? Like I Never Really Questioned It

Hey um what. What goddamn business did Omashu have having a King?? Like I never really questioned it since it came from such an early Book One still-world-building episode but. Omashu is a city, for starters, and it’s a city in the Earth Kingdom. Which. You know. HAS a king. 

You know I bet, honestly, Omashu doesn’t have a king. And NEVER had a king. Omashu had a succession of Governors or some shit and on the day that Bumi took the mantle he said “Fuck this ‘Governor Bumi’ stuff that’s lame. Call me King.” and when his advisors said they can’t legally do that Bumi passed a law changing his title from Governor to King, stuck a crown on his head, and called it macaroni.

And the citizens of Omashu were probably just like “alright” cuz like. Bumi strikes me as the kind of Local Town Eccentric who has a working personal relationship with pretty much everyone so all 100,000 people of Omashu heard this decree of Kingship and went “yeah that tracks” and got on with their day.

Outside of Omashu though? Good god. That’s gotta be a fucking look. At this point 112-year-old Bumi has been ‘King’ for a lifetime longer than the actual Earth King. What a look. How much sleep do you think Long Feng loses about this??? How many assassination attempts do you think he tried to carry out, only to have the Dai Lee come crawling home with the imprint of Bumi’s face smashed into their armor and some rock candy stuffed into their socks?

Ba Sing Se adores its appearance of order and structure and hierarchy and I cannot even begin to imagine their Daily Hell of dealing with Omashu’s centenarian feast-loving candy-munching batshit unhinged and utterly unkillable pseudo-King. 

The Fire Nation taking over Omashu was probably the happiest goddamn day of Long Feng’s life.   

kids shouldn’t be fighting your wars

Katara: I truly believe water solves all our problems

Katara: dehydrated? drink some water

Katara: want clear skin? drink some water?

Katara: need to rid yourself of an enemy? drown them

Hair Care: The Journey

My favorite parts of Necropolis were how grumpy Whyborne was, his fez, and his camel constantly trying to eat his fez.

I’m glad @jordanlhawk likes my Griffin stress-baking headcanon. Now I have tons of headcanons thanks to it. Here goes:

Griffin excels at anything lemon custard. The old ladies of Widdershins love his lemon custard filled cupcakes. He brings them extra, and they use them as finger food for their late night occult gatherings.

I can totally see Widdershins having Gilmore Girls type town meetings with the Arsenic and old Lace type of insanity like: “The Dweller of the Deep occult gathering has been moved to Tuesday at midnight, leaving the Librarian’s stealth and espionage classes to move to another night since both need the town gazebo. Also, remember no blood rituals at the Whyborne and Griffin fan club, it’s for all ages and during teatime. Blood at a tea gathering, honestly, yes I’m glaring at you Ms. Crabfeathers.”