Intro: Her M.list | Knj

intro: her m.list | knj

⟶ 𝑠𝑢𝑚𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑦:〝 you enter namjoon’s life in the most unexpected of ways, but will you be able to stay, especially when he comes with three adorable but chaotic children, even more chaotic best friends and a bitch of an ex-wife? not to mention your own emotional baggage. 〞singe dad au.

❥ 𝑝𝑎𝑖𝑟𝑖𝑛𝑔: single dad!namjoon x marine vet!reader

❥ 𝑔𝑒𝑛𝑟𝑒: angst ⋆ fluff ⋆ smut

❥ 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑑 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑡: 93k (current)

❥ 𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑡𝑢𝑠: on-going

⟶ 𝑤𝑎𝑟𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠: see each chapter 

⇥ find the playlist here

➾ Main Storyline: 

⊛ Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3

⊛ Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6

⊛ Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 

⊛ Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12

⊛ Chapter 13 | Chapter 14 

➾ Minis:

❥ Mini #1 - in which Jimin wants his ‘sea doctor’ noona to save his friend’s goldfish

❥ Mini #2 - in which YN and Jungkook go on an ice cream date

❥ Mini #3 - in which YN is sick, and Namjoon and the boys take care of her

❥ Mini #4 - in which YN and Taehyung go to the stationery store and then paint together

❥ Mini #5 - in which YN is completely exhausted from work and Namjoon takes care of her

❥ Mini #6 - in which everyone celebrates Hoseok’s birthday

Lovely

Inspired by the song Lovely by Billie Eilish and Khalid

Not revised

Resquest here

“Thought I found a way

Thought I found a way out (found)

But you never go away (never go away)

So I guess I gotta stay now”

"Stop it!" she laughed loudly trying to escape his wiggling fingers.

"It's your fault, missy!" he shouted running after her. The empty field giving them all the space and privacy they oh, so loved.

He caught her in less than two minutes, with her help of course, and both of them stumbled down.

"Well, hello there," she smiled cheekily at his figure hovering hers. He stared at her lovingly, his eyes twinkling.

"You're the most beautiful woman I ever laid my eyes on," he breathed out, leaving her speechless for a moment.

Her mouth twitched, then a smile stretched her lips indulging one of his own. Soon their lips connected in that empty wild field.

“Oh, I hope someday I'll make it out of here

Even if it takes all night or a hundred years

Need a place to hide, but I can't find one near

Wanna feel alive, outside I can't fight my fear”

"Why don't you believe in me!" she cried from where she stood in the middle of their living room, watching with blurred eyes him pacing on the other side of it.

"How can I?!" he turned abruptly to look at her with angry eyes. "I know what I saw!"

"You don't know anything!" she was quick to respond. "I told you what happened how can you not believe me?" she sniffed, trying to recompose herself as she tried the tears that had already fallen with the cuffs of her sleeves.

"I can't deal with you right now," he grumbled and like that he left their home, left her a mess on their living room.

“Isn't it lovely, all alone

Heart made of glass, my mind of stone

Tear me to pieces, skin to bone

Hello, welcome home”

"'m sorry, love," he murmured in her ear as he cradled her in his arms. The comfort and warmth he gave her made her melt on his embrace, relishing in the kiss he placed upon her head as he caressed her hair, soothing her after the blown up.

It was their thing. Love, laugh, then fight and cry, then making up and continuing their cycle. She knew, yes she knew how unhealthy it was, everyone around her knew and told her countless times.

But how could she- how could she leave him and live without him when he is all she ever known? All she ever wanted and all she desired. She didn't mind fighting if she knew they would be back at how they used to in a moment.

She didn't mind being torn to pieces if it means him coming back to her, to their home, apologizing for his behavior and being his loving self again.

She didn't mind.

“Walking out of time

Looking for a better place (looking for a better place)

Something's on my mind

Always in my head space”

"Do you think we'll be better someday?" she asked him one day, her voice just above a whisper as to not disturb the atmosphere surrounding them as they laid on the empty field side by side.

"We will," he replied after some time and they went back to being silent. She didn't voice it, but in her mind, she asked, when?

“But I know someday I'll make it out of here

Even if it takes all night or a hundred years

Need a place to hide, but I can't find one near

Wanna feel alive outside I can't fight my fear”

"You need to leave him," she heard, "T-this isn't alright! He steps over you all the time and you let him! That's not how it is supposed to be"

She heard everything her friend told her with a blank expression, the only give away that she was indeed paying attention was the tears accumulating in her sad eyes.

"How?" she whispered and her friend's face fell. "I-I love him"

Sighing, she took her hand, squeezing it in comfort, "This isn't love," she said. "You'll understand someday, but you need to give yourself a chance- t-this isn't a life"

She stared at her friend's exasperated face, she was unconsciously biting the tip of her tongue, as she always did in emotional situations.

"Okay," she whispered, but in her had she added, someday.

.

Two months later she finally had the guts to change. They had just arrived from a party, one that didn't go well.

The silence that surrounded them on their way back and when they entered the house was deafening.

She walked up the stairs and to their room, him following her cautiously. He didn't know what to say, the right words at least. He waited for her to say something when she suddenly stopped in the middle of their bedroom by their bed, but she didn't say anything, instead, she stared at the bed as if it held something extremely important.

After minutes like this, he opened his mouth, "Love-" "I'm leaving"

Her words cut his and his body froze. "W-what?" he managed to crack when he saw her going to their closet.

She was finally doing it. Her heart was clenching and pounding rapidly in her ribcage as she reached for her suitcase. Her mind was running wild but at the same time, she felt empty as she packed.

"What are you doing?" he asked from the door, confusion and desperation lacing his words, "C'mon, l-let's talk it out. Everything will be alright," he tried coaxing her, stepping closer to take her in his arms.

She shook her head softly, her lips pursed to not let a word out as she finished. She passed by him, dodging his hand and went to their bathroom where she picked a few necessities.

The two stood in the middle of their bedroom once again, her suitcase now by her feet, the silence surrounding them uncomfortable. 

"It wasn't like that," he shook his head trying to catch her eyes as he spoke, but she stared intently at the floor as if it was the most interesting thing there. "You know I would never-"

"I don't," she whispered, finally accumulating enough courage to look up at him. "You gave the message very clear, I won't be on your way anymore," her head barely moved from one side to the other, "Be with whoever you want"

“But I love you,” he said looking into her eyes.

She bit her lip, it was so hard to do what she was doing. But she had to be strong now, so, releasing her lip, she spoke quietly, “This is not love”

And she left. She took a cab and she went to the only place she thought at that moment. She knocked on the door and everything washed over her when her friend opened the door, hair messy and face confused at someone knocking at her door so late, but it dissipated when she saw the mess in front of her. And she knew she had finally realized.

“Isn't it lovely, all alone

Heart made of glass, my mind of stone

Tear me to pieces, skin to bone

Hello, welcome home”

A tear rolled down her cheek as she felt the emotion she put in the lyrics. Her eyes met with his on the audience, his sitting figure staring at her with sadness and something similar to remorse perhaps, longing for something he lost and hearing her smooth voice singing her pain, pained him, hurt his heart and destroyed his mind at the outcome of something that began so beautifully.

“Woah, yeah

Yeah, ah

Woah, woah

Hello, welcome home”

The audience applauded her performance and she bowed her head slightly in appreciation, trying her best to hold on when all she felt was as if she was crumbling down.

"We will be together forever," he said as they stared at each other, eyes shining with happiness and love. Their breath still quite uneven after their share of love and trust. Their first time and the moment they most felt connected with each other.

"I love you," she declared caressing his face, a loving smile appearing on her lips.

"And I love you," he smiled back at her, "So, so, so much," he sealed his promise with a kiss.

The memories would last forever in her mind, she had no doubt of that. The love they had, the love she thought they had would be forever imprinted in her heart and soul.

But sometimes love just isn't enough.

look at these cuties!!!!

CHARACTER FACIAL EXPRESSIONS (WRITING REFERENCE)

EYES/BROWS

his eyes widened

her eyes went round

her eyelids drooped

his eyes narrowed

his eyes lit up

his eyes darted

he squinted

she blinked

her eyes twinkled

his eyes gleamed

her eyes sparkled

his eyes flashed

his eyes glinted

his eyes burned with…

her eyes blazed with…

her eyes sparked with…

her eyes flickered with…

_____ glowed in his eyes

the corners of his eyes crinkled

she rolled her eyes

he looked heavenward

she glanced up to the ceiling

she winked

tears filled her eyes

his eyes welled up

her eyes swam with tears

his eyes flooded with tears

her eyes were wet

his eyes glistened

tears shimmered in her eyes

tears shone in his eyes

her eyes were glossy

he was fighting back tears

tears ran down her cheeks

his eyes closed

she squeezed her eyes shut

he shut his eyes

his lashes fluttered

she batted her lashes

his brows knitted

her forehead creased

his forehead furrowed

her forehead puckered

a line appeared between her brows

his brows drew together

her brows snapped together

his eyebrows rose

she raised a brow

he lifted an eyebrow

his eyebrows waggled

she gave him a once-over

he sized her up

her eyes bored into him

she took in the sight of…

he glared

she peered

he gazed

she glanced

he stared

she scrutinized

he studied

she gaped

he observed

she surveyed

he gawked

he leered

his pupils (were) dilated

her pupils were huge

his pupils flared

NOSE

her nose crinkled

his nose wrinkled

she sneered

his nostrils flared

she stuck her nose in the air

he sniffed

she sniffled

MOUTH

she smiled

he smirked

she grinned

he simpered

she beamed

her mouth curved into a smile

the corners of his mouth turned up

the corner of her mouth quirked up

a corner of his mouth lifted

his mouth twitched

he gave a half-smile

she gave a lopsided grin

his mouth twisted

he plastered a smile on his face

she forced a smile

he faked a smile

her smile faded

his smile slipped

he pursed his lips

she pouted

his mouth snapped shut

her mouth set in a hard line

he pressed his lips together

she bit her lip

he drew his lower lip between his teeth

she nibbled on her bottom lip

he chewed on his bottom lip

his jaw set

her jaw clenched

his jaw tightened

a muscle in her jaw twitched

he ground his jaw

he snarled/his lips drew back in a snarl

her mouth fell open

his jaw dropped

her jaw went slack

he gritted his teeth

she gnashed her teeth

her lower lip trembled

his lower lip quivered

SKIN

she paled

he blanched

she went white

the color drained out of his face

his face reddened

her cheeks turned pink

his face flushed

she blushed

he turned red

she turned scarlet

he turned crimson

a flush crept up her face

WHOLE FACE, ETC.

he screwed up his face

she scrunched up her face

he grimaced

she winced

she gave him a dirty look

he frowned

she scowled

he glowered

her whole face lit up

she brightened

his face went blank

her face contorted

his face twisted

her expression closed up

his expression dulled

her expression hardened

she went poker-faced

a vein popped out in his neck

awe transformed his face

fear crossed her face

sadness clouded his features

terror overtook his face

recognition dawned on her face

SOURCE