Darktober 5

Darktober 5

"Collinwood is nothing like I expected either. I read "estate" and "mansion" and I honestly pictured those giant modern McMansion monstrosities rich people are building all the time.

Collinwood is nothing like that. This place *is* huge, but it's huge in the way ancient castles are huge - like there was an actual purpose for all that space when it was built. There's the servant's quarters, the stables, the carriage house, the BALLROOM, everything a rich old European colonial family needed. Well. "Needed".

"We don't use even half of this place" Bridget said, sighing. "Too much work, not enough people. We only live in this little part over here these days." She nodded towards the sixth of the house we were approaching.

"What about the rest of the house?" I asked.

"Empty. Some places..." she glanced over at the unoccupied sections of the mansion.

It's strange, how welcoming the tiny little part of the house that was lit up looked, and how dark and definitely haunted the rest of the same house looked.

"Some places in this house haven't seen a human in centuries." Bridget said."

It was my birthday today! I turned 30. :) It was a very quiet day, but I think that's okay. Having a giant birthday bash would have felt like I was saying goodbye to something. When really, it's a day like any other, the only thing that's changed is the number on my government record, and I'm really very okay with closing the book on my 20s. I'm cool with being "old". "Old" in very heavy air quotes because actually I'm still ridiculously, painfully young. I just magically don't get hit on as often by creepy old dudes. I'd say that's a pretty big plus. My 20s were incredibly tough and weird, but I learned a lot and now I'm excited to start a new decade of my life where I'm still young but maybe slightly less stupid. ON TO 40!

As summer starts to wind down, I think we could all use a nice little souvenir from the season to help get us through the winter months. My own summer memories are very peach-centered, as I remember getting excited as a kid for the peaches to ripen on our little peach tree at home, grown from a tough lil peach pit someone threw away by our garage. This print is 100% available as both a piece of wall art AND a card over on my INPRNT shop! Click those words to check it out and help me pay for ice cream (and groceries/rent/student loan debt) if you are able and you like my work! I'm juggling a PhD program and arting, so all support is most welcome.

Also I am gonna be getting ready for autumn and All Hallow's Eve pretty soon, so if y'all are into that.... keep checking back!

Interested in going full cottage core? Here's some stuff you need to expect (from a hobbit-lookin' gal who grew up in the woods):

1) dead animals. Dead rodents, specifically. No matter how well you clean, the mice and rats will come. And your cat will find them. And they will bring their bloodied corpses to you and expect praise. If you do not have cats (which automatically disqualifies you from being cottage core, sorry I don't make the rules), small furry creatures will find other ways to die inside your house. You will find them in your attic. You will find them in your drawers. You will find them under your bed. They are most definitely inside your walls. You may not know it, but you definitely have a wall full of dead squirrels.

Also, *do not get a pool*. It's just another place for cute animals to die and then be discovered by your very impressionable and easily traumatized young children. Also, they're impossible to keep clean. If you're truly cottage core, you swim in a river or lake or ice-cold pond created by the snowmelt. It's better for the drought anyway.

2) BIG dead animals. You want to keep goats? Maybe sheep? That's great. Just know that at least three of them will die suddenly at the worst time, either from snakebite or illness or coyote attack or because they literally just decided to lie down under a nice tree and peacefully pass with literally no explanation. And then you will have to figure out how to bury them. And then how to have the Death Talk with your young, impressionable children who may or may not already be traumatized by the drowned fox they found in the pool a week ago.

Besides good fencing/livestock shelters, or maybe getting a livestock gaurdian dog/donkey/llama (no, I am not joking), there is nothing you can do about the mountain lions, bears and coyotes eating your animals. They were there before you. They will be there after you and the rest of humanity are gone. It's harsh, but that is what the song from the Lion King was actually about: Mufasa's right to eat everyone there.

Speaking of which:

3) you share the land. You do not own it. Oh, you think the bear cares that you bought this patch of forest with money and you don't like him eating your goats and/or peaches?? You can try showing him the deed and the NO TRESPASSING signs, but somehow I don't think that'll work.

Nature does not care. It will do as it does. No matter how good you are at singing and how many birds you befriend. Again, harsh. But not utterly insane. If you respect nature, it will not respect you, but you will at least know what to expect. So gopher-proof your garden. And get a cat.

4) coyote howling is actually quite lovely. Once you get over how eerie it sounds.

5) frogs are LOUD. They are so FREAKING loud. Some nights they will be SO loud you will not be able to sleep. Do not entice them into your yard with a pond unless you are willing to bear the consequences.

6) birds are LOUD. There is no need for a morning alarm, they ARE your alarm. You may think this sounds lovely, but you may not be feeling that way at 6 am on a Saturday after being kept up all night by the frogs.

7) think you'll go barefoot everywhere? Or at least have a good pair of Birkenstocks? No, my child, you will need to invest in at least 6 pairs of gumboots that will mostly be mud by the time spring comes around. Hiking boots are for summer. Unless you're ready for poison oak and ticks. Again, there is nothing you can do about that. Unless you are willing to take the risk and get a brush-eating goat. Even then, remember the snakes I mentioned earlier?

8) you will get desensitized to horror movie scenarios real quick. A cabin in the woods? Bro, that's my house. A pair of red eyes in the dark? That's just a coyote. Maybe a wandering dog. And even if it was a demon, how would it get in my house? That sucker's locked up tight. Creepy noises at night? Like, say, a woman screaming? That's probably a mountain lion or a fox. Yeah, they do that.

You quickly find that the bad things actually tend to happen to people who did not do their nature research as I explained above. Like, say, camping with grizzly bears. Or eating something they found in the woods. What kind of idiot are you??? The kind that eats berries they don't know the name of but think they look like blackberries. That's who.

9) what neighbors you have, may not be the... friendliest. There's a reason people move out this far, and it's usually to get away from other people. Are they marijuana farmers? Probably. Do they want to murder you? What, no, they don't want to get into trouble. They moved here to AVOID trouble. Just keep yourself to yourself and you'll be fine. But definitely make some friends in town. There is a town near you, right?

10) once you get over that initial learning curve/trauma, you will find that the forest actually is a really peaceful place to live. You know the patterns. You learn to read the weather. You are at peace with the fact that your beloved goats may die, but for now, you have succeeded in protecting them. As scary as the wilderness can be, it's far less scary than living with other humans. I'd rather deal with the peach-stealing bear (I am SO onto you) than the creepy dude who lives in the apartment below mine. Humans are far more unpredictable and weird than nature is. But that's just my *opinion*.

Okay, them's my thoughts. Anyone want to add/critique?

My very favorite Rumiko Takahashi panel.

Darktober 8

"... The attic room is, as Mz. Collins promised, very comfortable. It might just be the most comfortable room I've ever slept in, actually.

Granted, my basis for comparison is negligible, to say the least. But I dare anyone to say a big bed, fresh sheets and blankets, a clean new rug and a view of the ocean isn't cozy.

Of course, I'm writing all this as I'm struggling to fall asleep in this wonderfully comfy, fresh-smelling bed with the window looking out over the ocean beside me.

The attic doesn't scare me. Old rooms, new places, living with strangers, none of that has scared me since... I don't actually remember a time when I was ever scared of those things.

No, there's something else. I can't say what it is, exactly. It feels like... There's something waiting. A person, an event, I don't know. But there's a sense of hiding, waiting, in the air. And if I blink, much less fall asleep, I'm going to miss it.

Or it's going to get me."