I've Had Some Time To Think About It And I'm Feeling Better!

I've had some time to think about it and I'm feeling better!

I reminded myself that I'm the odd one out here. Of course people think I look weird! Just because I love Star Wars and Jedi doesn't mean everyone else feels the same and know what's going on. I'm in the real world not online. The unfortunate truth is that adults who dress up in costumes will always be seen as weirdos/immature/losers etc etc. I signed up for that when I decided to step outside wearing something unconventional. It sucks that I had some negative reactions. But you know what? I've started to have some positive ones too!

A little kid recognized my costume!

I got to take a picture with a coworker who dressed up today for her first time (up till now, I've been the only person in the whole store who's been dressing up) even though she's been scared to do it all week!

An elderly person exclaimed, "WOW, I love your outfit!" When I walked past them and said they wish more people were like me where they're from!

It's been a learning experience and I'm thankful for the reality check. I don't have to play by society's rules, but doing so is gonna make me an outsider. I gotta be okay with that 🤷

Thanks again for y'all's kind words! I love you guys 🫶

I really appreciate you guys. I wore my Jedi costume to work... let's just say my coworkers weren't as supportive as y'all...

I'm genuinely bummed out. I know my costumes aren't good. I don't get them special made or anything. I just use what's in my closet or from the thrift store. This is my third costume this week and I'm starting to realize I was probably being made fun of the entire time.

I know I'm not attractive. I can't help it. I wish I looked good like everyone else. I just like dressing up cuz it's fun. It's silly and makes me happy.

I'll still do Stranger Things tomorrow since it's supposed to be a group costume (even though I'm thinking I'm gonna be left hanging) and after that, I'm not sure...

I'm glad I have y'all. When I start getting down, I think about how y'all were nice to me 💜

Padawan braids should be far more decorated I don't care

I want them to have beads and bows and jewels and rings and bells and-

I want them to scream culture, to scream tradition, to scream history!!!

BEHOLD my Jedi costume!

At my job, we're allowed to wear Halloween costumes throughout the month of October!

It'd be a shame if I didn't dress up as at least ONE Ewan McGregor character.

Obi-Wan is probably the only genuine costumey character, but in the very likely event that I can't find the materials to do his outfit, I need a backup.

Can you guys help me brainstorm costumes to put together?

Song Requests!

So, last week my job started something called "Request Friday" where employees could write in song requests that would then be played on the store speaker. It was a hit! Everyone had a lot of fun and it boosted team morale!

Well, I thought it'd be fun to take song requests from you guys and write them in at work tomorrow in your honor! 😁

THE RULES:

The songs MUST be clean! Meaning no vulgarity or explicit sexual/violent lyrics. This includes even "tame" curse words like damn/hell. It is a workplace environment after all and they're very strict about what customers may hear.

Not a rule but a preference: high tempo songs are preferred because of the fast-paced nature of the job. Slow songs, in turn, tend to slow us down 🤷

That's pretty much it!

Also, songs in Spanish are VERY WELCOME!

Leave your request in the comments or tags and I'll submit what I can tomorrow. Let's see how it goes!

If you have any other questions, please don't hesitate to ask! 🫶

My bike finally broke down on me, so guess who's about to walk an hour in the rain home from work? Wish me luck!

I finally did it...I want to die.

I'm sorry. Y'all didn't follow for all this sad stuff. I don't have people offline to share my vulnerable self with so easily. I've tried and tried to push through and figure things out by myself. I just feel like an absolute wreck of a person. I'm not even a person. I have something I must do that I've been putting off, and of course, it must be done alone. I'm very scared and angry and crying as I type this. I can only hope against hope against hope against HOPE that I will finally receive peace when it is done. That I can move on and be normal and happy and a real person again. The kind of person you'll like. I've let my family down. I've let myself down. And I feel like I've let you down. Things will be different. They'll be better. I have to believe it.