Am I Enough PT 7

Am I Enough PT 7

Bucky X Reader

Summary: A fire brings the group back together. How will things play out with Bucky and will his feelings hold strong?

Warnings: Fluff, overstimulated avengers, little angst.

A/N: SUPRISE!! I finished it early. This is a little long so beware. Also, I hope it isn’t repetitive I wanted to display both sides of the story, so let me know if it worked.

“You’re a jerk you know that? You make me feel all these things for you and then rip it away from me. Tell me, did you enjoy it? Enjoy leading me on, was it some sick game to you two? ‘Oh look, let’s see how long I can string her along before she realizes it all means nothing.’ Well, I’m happy I could entertain you. Gah, I was so stupid for believing any of it. I can barely look at you now.”

Bucky POV

After the call came in he started to freak out a little. She was coming back, how was he supposed to act. He knew he had to prove himself to the others and her but… but what? Did he go meet her at the hanger? Should he try to apologize? Maybe he should just stay out of the way?

He decided that staying away would be best, when the next call came, announcing she was about to land, everyone practically ran to the elevator. Each trying to be the first to see her. He stayed back, he had decided maybe the subtle way, was the best way. So dinner for the group it was. Pulling out the necessary equipment he got to work. Choosing what to make was relatively easy, he remembered always catch a small smile and an obvious twinkle in (Y/N)’s eyes when people announced pasta for dinner. She had a weakness for warm bread and (Y/F/S).

He had just put the water on when he heard the clamor from the living room, all of them practically tumbling out the elevator, one talking over the others. They craved her attention, she had a goofy smile on her face as they each tried to one-up the other with their stories. Suddenly she glances over, eyes connecting with his. She pauses in her step, briefly taking him in. Man, he wants to go over there to hug her but before he can, she simply sends him a small nod before proceeding to the couch with the others.

He blinks what had just happened, there was no way she should be acknowledging his presence. He thought she wouldn’t even want to see him, ignore he even existed. Feeling his blood begin to boil he pauses dinner, maybe she wasn’t as upset about the breakup. She had made it seem like it was this big deal this irreparable harm to her and she was smiling at him.

Wait no, he shakes his head, she has to be putting up a front. Trying not to ruin her reunion with her friends. He sighs to himself, how can he believe she didn’t care anymore? Why was he so angry right now? She just got back he was trying to fix all of this. Focusing back on dinner he didn’t hear Sam walk into the kitchen.

“What’s going through that head of yours?” Sam asks leaning against one of the counters arms folded.

“Too much.” Bucky is surprised by how open he is with Sam nowadays. Usually, he would go to his automatic reply, nothing. He turns to Sam studying him, what was it that made him open up to this guy so easily.

“What I got something on my face?” He runs his hands over it trying to wipe away whatever was there. Bucky simply shakes his head. “We can talk about it later if you want? I was just seeing if I could help you with dinner.”

He has a knowing grin on his face. Revealing that he knew exactly why Bucky was doing all of this. He nods and directs him to the bread, garlic bread was high on her list of favorites. They work in silent tandem, each knowing what the other was doing and moving on to the next task without asking. Every once in a while Bucky would look up, making sure she was still there, fearing she changed her mind and fled once more. He couldn’t help the pause in his actions at moments when she would let out a laugh, one that practically split her face. They listened to the team continue to yammer away, it made both of them smile knowing how much (Y/N) was loved here in the group.

With the table set up and dinner is placed on the table, everyone files in. There is a brief scuffle on who is sitting next to (Y/N) and across from her. Everyone eventually gets settled except Sam, Bucky, and Nat. Bucky brings the last of the food placing the bread directly in front of her. While he is leaning over (Y/N), Nat shuffles in, both of them tense taking the other in. Nat drops her head and took a seat as far away for her as she could.

There was a moment of silence before, “Dibs!!” Sam shouted grabbing the pasta. The rest dived in filling their plates. Bucky couldn’t help but take in the group. This is how it should be, what it always should have been. A family together, enjoying a meal. The meal continues, no one acknowledges the underlining tension between the team members.

After wrapping up they decide to reconvene in the living room for a movie night. They went to their separate quarters to get pajamas, blankets, and pillows. Bucky retreated, quickly changing and grabbing his favorite blanket, (Y/N) had picked it out of course but he had grown even more attached to it of late.

Swinging out of his door, he ran smack into someone. They bounced off and he instinctively reached out pulling them against him to steady them both. He looked down, he was met with (Y/E/C) eyes. It wasn’t just anyone it was (Y/N).

Y/N POV

The flight had been quick, you didn’t have much left after the fire was put out. The whole ride had you twitching though. The closer you got the more the twitch became more prominent. Sam at one point reached over and started to stroke your hand holding it still.

When you got off the plane you were bombarded with people and hugs. Each trying to squeeze there way into your arms. Man, you had missed them. You hadn’t quite realized how much until they were here. You were home. They pulled you toward the elevator, not wanting to be left out they all crammed in. When you exited, you were laughing at a story the Thor had just told. You cracked up, he had such a never could quite grasp Earth’s ways. As you looked up to take in the place you are met with those steel blue eyes. You freeze. Not ready, not ready, NOT READY. You were here though.

‘Focus, don’t let him see the pain (Y/N)’ you pep talked your self. You shoot him a small smile. ‘Nailed It’ you give yourself a mental fist bump. You could do this.

Your friend continues to fight for your attention all the way until dinner is called. They even fought over who was sitting closest to you. As they settled the final few struggled in that when you saw her. She was pale and her hair stood out even more against her. Her eyes were rimmed in red and the bags beneath her eyes suggested she hadn’t been sleeping well at all. You felt a twinge of sadness, you had never seen her like this. She was the strong one of the group. Heck, she had gotten what, no who she wanted. She drops her eyes and sits.

It was the perfect meal back. You knew Bucky had made it with you in mind. You had caught a few of the looks he sent you while preparing the meal. Drenching your pasta in the sauce. The bread almost made you moan, there was a slight eye flutter at the first bite.

When the meal was done and the movie night called you waited for the room to clear. You pulled Sam back, “I don’t know if I can do this.” You whispered to him, pulling on his arm as you tried to pull yourself together. “I don’t know how to act, how do I not fall apart while he is in the room?”

Sam chuckles shaking his head at you, “I think you're doing just fine if anything I should be asking you how you are managing it. You pulled off being ok better than anyone I have ever seen. As for now, Bucky is trying to make amends just keep that in mind alright?” You nod before turning toward your room.

You speed up not wanting anyone to wait on you. Not paying attention you run straight into a brick wall or so it felt like. When the walls arms came and wrapped around you gripping you close your eyes shot up meeting his. Well, crap!

“You alright?” He says after a moment of you two taking each other in. For some reason, you can’t take your eyes off each other. He searches your face looking for answers and reactions to the situation.

You give a small nod, “Yeah, sorry about that. Too excited for the movie night.”

“Oh yeah been a while since we had one. I just hope it’s a better movie than last time.”

“Hey! Volcanos in New York wasn’t that bad. It could happen here.” You have the smile on your face now remember that last movie. Cheesy to the extreme.

You both chuckle at the memory. You can't help but take in his face and the joy on it. You missed it. As soon as that thought ran through your head, you both realize what is happening and an awkwardness settles over you. You clear your throat and step away.

“I…I better get going before they send a search squad.” He only dips his head in acknowledgment. Turning your head away from him. “Oh and Bucky?” You swing your head back, he hadn’t moved just lifted his head up to look at you. “Thank you for dinner it was perfect.” You jog away. Leaving a very confused and shaken Bucky in your wake.

You enter the living room to find everyone present surprisingly. You find Sam on the love seat and almost by automatic response plop down next to him swinging your legs over his. He starts to rub your calves while you get comfy. You start to converse with Sam chatting and laughing when you noticed an odd silence about you.

You turn to the group, they all had eyes on the two of you. You cock your head to the side, asking a silent question of what’s going on.

“Aren’t you two lovebirds getting cozy.” Tony wiggled his eyebrows at you and you start to blush. Sam lets out a laugh. He pulls your legs into him.

“She’s mine now, shouldn’t have left me all alone with her. But really I just like these legs. So pretty, so soft. My precious.” He strokes your leg whole channeling his inner Smegal. There are snickers throughout. “Nah, nothing going on here, we just got used to our late night talks is all.”

The group nods, “So what are we watching?” You ask to get the subject off of you.

“I think, you should pick, but since it is you it will be (Y/F/M).” You nod. Gotcha there, you tend to be predictable when it came to movies. The movie begins and the room goes quiet. Even if it was your favorite, you feel your eyes grow heavy. Soon you're nodding off snuggling even closer to Sam. No one noticed until the whispers started. You shifted in your seat, settling for the moment. A couple minutes later you do it again but with tears dropping down. Sam quickly gathers you up, pulling you in close to him.

“Ahhh, shh I gotcha baby girl, calm down it’s just a dream.” He’s running his hands along your back and legs, gripping you close. After a moment you go limp and slumber again.

He casts his eyes up taking in the team. The heartbreak is evident, a few guilty, some for witnessing it others being the cause of it. “Hey everyone relaxes, it happens. We all get them. She doesn’t have as many now but they pop up. We are working on them. Right now she just needs support and not too many questions.”

The group nods. Seeing their affirmation he stands up with you taking you to your room. He tucks you in and smoothes your hair back. You would be ok. You were strong and so freaking stubborn. Either way, you would make it and he would be there to help.

@veronicalei @ohlookfanfiction @theassetseyeliner @bustanut2k17 @luckynumber1213 @owhatshername1 @chipilerendi @caelestiside @anbrax5553 @fandom-writes @boundtomyfate @annie-are-you-okay @megs4real @marvelous-imagining @mizzzpink @coffeeismylife28 @yknott81 @chameerah @stevette60 @genlovesdcb @loveyourselfcreateyourself @winter-in-wakanda @buckyappreciationsociety @sammysgirl1997 @unicornqueen05 @sexyashmike @magpiemischief @steggy4ever @greeneyedgirls4 @melconnor2007 @iamwarrenspeace @justreadingfics @buckyismyaesthetic @gondorgirl01 @winterbuttmunch

I'll Be Here Part 2

Steve X Reader

Warnings: angst and little fluff, super long because I can’t help myself

A/N: So this thing here is going to have 3 parts I believe and as stated this us part 2.I have learned not to rush posting something especially when I'm tired. Thank you again so much for reading these it is a great confidence booster and I am really enjoying myself. As always feedback is appreciated. Oh and thank you to my very first asked to be tagged person @veronicalei Part 1 has been updated.

Summary: After splitting up with Steve to let him get away with Bucky you are captured and with it comes to some consequences you didn’t expect to face. Will you ever escape your prison?

They had swarmed the building, guns pointed and threats made you paralyzed some putting up no real fight because at the end of the day you had done your crime and now you had to pay for it. This would keep everyone safe as well, and not just from Secretary Ross but from yourself as well. 

When they had surrounded you, you put your hands up behind your head and sunk to your knees letting them approach you. It didn’t really help because they still threw you to the ground and forcibly cuffed you. When you were subdued they call him in. He stalked towards you a smug grin on his face as he looked down upon you. 

“Oh, I’m going to get such pleasure from putting you away in the little hidey hole that I have planned. You will never see the light of day again.” He was practically cackling at the thought. 

You don’t speak merely stare at him, unnerving him with you uninterested glare. He could do his worse, there wasn’t exactly anything out here to come back to anyway. While they loaded you into an armored truck you glanced around one last time. Hoping that maybe Steve or someone had stuck around to see you carted off. That he would know to come to rescue you, but why would he when you specifically told Sam not to let him.

The doors shut with a bang they have surrounded you with four guards even though you have no intention of going anywhere, not that they knew that but still. After about 10 minutes into your journey, the guard on your left suddenly shifts, taking his baton out and striking you hard in the stomach. You told in half with the pain.

“That was for Mac, you crazy animal.” He hisses. The others have drawn closet as well, each of them taking their hits but never where you couldn’t cover it up. You guess this wi be a normal thing now, you draw into yourself hoping the pain will lessen but they continue each strike causing more pain. Your grunts and whimpers are the only vocal sound in the truck. Finally, the trucks slow to a stop, the guards all sit back with grins on their faces while you attempt to straighten yourself gulping in as much air as you can.

The doors swing open and the first two get out, they escort you to a nearby jet and you all are soon on your way out over the sea. Ross’s voice can be heard talking to the guards, “I know you were upset, but couldn’t you have waited till we were on the Raft to do this? I want him to see her original state and then do whatever else he has planned.“ 

You shudder half from the pain, half the thought of what this person could possibly have planned. They leave you alone for the remainder of the trip, this being a few hours. Upon landing they cart you out dragging you inside a large hanger. You can see several runs of water coming down from the ceiling it was either raining or you were in a submersible you decide. Not good if it was the later. You are quickly escorted and handed over to another set of guards who proceed to file you through a check-in process. They strip you of everything you own, your clothes are gone and replaced with a hospital gown. Weapons and everything else confiscated. Instead, they hand you another set of standard inmate uniform.

They then lead you to the next station where a collar is fitted around your neck. They then explain that this was for special inmates like yourself and whenever you did something out of line they would emit an electric pulse through you. They then added that they also did it when just looking at you pissed them off, like right now. They hit the switch and you spasmed falling to your knees as it courses through you. They all had a good laugh at your expense. 

You took too long getting up so they hooked their arms under yours and lifted you to what seemed to be a doctor’s office. The doctor tapped on his pad pulling up a new patient file with your name on it. He read over the slim notes before getting to work inputting your data. Blood samples were taken and you were escorted to your new cell, your home for the next eternity as they put it. 

You curled in the bed and shut the world out. This was you state for the next couple days, you never really moved you certainly never are or drank anything just laid there.

You cell opened and two guards came in forcing you up. You were still pretty sore from your last encounter so again they drag you back to the doctor’s office. You were laid down on a bed your hands and feet then strapped down. You start to panic unsure of what will happen next. The doctor walks up with a small tray of instruments, most of them being needles of various sizes.

"Welcome Miss (Y/L/N), my name is Dr. Krieger, we are going to try to cure you then we may be able to release you to a normal facility. But for now your my guest for a while. I have to say you have the most interesting blood I’ve seen in a while. Oh, what you must have gone through to get this.” He chuckles darkly while moving around you. “Well, no matter let’s get started.” He claps his hand and reaches for the first syringe. “We are going to try and cure each individual toxin and see how that goes.”

He takes the first and injects it into you. It feels like fire burning through your veins. It spreads through your body causing you to spasm and groan at the pain. “Interesting.” You hear him mutter. This goes on for a long time, how long you’re not sure, he continues with the same one injecting it every few hours you would say.

After an eternity, he takes one more sample of blood and dismisses you from the room. You are carried to your cell and locked in. This goes one for a couple days, the same routine hours of pain and back to your cell. The doctor has made note of the changes in you, your skin has a blueish tint, your eyes are still purple but a yellow-grey fog now surrounds them. The “cures” aren’t doing anything at all, in fact, they seem to be killing you instead. 

On day three, about halfway through you are dismissed by the doctor to go welcome some guests. Taken back you are propped up against the wall nearest the glass door. Once you are sealed inside, the main door opens and Sam, Wanda, Clint, and a man you’ve come to know as Scott, are marched in with Secretary Ross leading them.

“Look who’s here to see you!” He exclaims to you waving his arm back motioning to the others. “I’ve almost got the complete set. Though now from the looks of you I might be down one soon. I will have to speak to the doctor. Not so high and mighty now are we.” He sneers at you and lets everyone see you. 

They all gasp, you didn’t know what you looked like but from the response, it must not have been good. You can’t even raise your hand you are so weak. Wanda tears up, even though she is the one with a collar like you and a straight jacket. 

You hear Sam whisper “No” then he and Clint lunges forward toward Ross, the guards hold them back. “This, this is your great plan to lock us up for not doing what you say. To torture us till we comply. You’re no better than Hydra. Heck, I would take them over you any day." 

"Well lucky for you, you’re stuck with me for a very long time.” Ross snickers and turns away heading out the door. 

“You won’t get away with this. He will come and everyone will know what you really are.”

Ross simply waves a hand at Sam, the door closes. Each person is escorted and locked into their cages. Sam presses himself against the glass trying to get a better look at you. You head had fallen down now leaning against the door.

“Hey, (Y/N) Look at me. What did they do? What did these freaks do to you?”

You couldn’t reply as much as you wanted to. The guards eventually came back and took you to Dr. Keigal to complete your session with him. Not that it had ever gone right, but this time something really went wrong with the treatment, you had just gotten back when you started to convulse on the bed. Sam screams your name and calls for the guards. By the time anyone got there it had died out but a small trail of blood could be seen from the corner of your mouth. The guards called Dr. Kreiger, he determined nothing could be done gave you a mild sedative and left. 

Falling into an uneasy slumber, you had no real control over your body. While you were out you started to mumble, “I’ll be here, I will be here.”

You had always said this to Steve, no one really knows why but you did and now that Steve wasn’t here it broke their hearts, you were calling for him. Sam signed he couldn’t look at you without feeling the tears build up. Clint laid down looking at the ceiling trying to control his rage. No one should go through this not ever.

The main door slide open revealing a beat up, Tony. Clint started to clap waking you from you light slumber. Your eyes peeled open, your heart stuttered see how bad of shape he was in not only physically but even in his body language you see an exhausted beaten man. You can’t quite make out their words yet you hear having yet to fully come back. It slowly fades in though. 

“You need anything?" 

Sam gives him a sneer. "Why don’t you ask the girls that?!” Tony turns first seeing Wanda he takes her in, when he turns towards you first he is surprised. Probably didn’t even know you were here, then his face falls taking you in. 

“What happened, how… Why is she like this?”

“You happened that’s what, you and that butt buddy Ross of yours, she was brought here before us when we got here she was already this bad." 

You see Tony’s face fell even more, you reach out your hand it shakes so much and is so heavy that you drop it almost immediately. Tony lurches forward slightly, Sam chuckles. 

"You don’t get the right to care what happens to her not anymore. You chose your side and now she pays the consequent for them. We are nothing but the enemy now." 

You try to shake your head but can’t you see the black swarming the edge of your vision pulling you in. To other, it looks like your shaking and then your eyes flutter close. They all sigh it’s the first real rest you had gotten. You again start to mumble a little, the same phrase "I’ll be here.”

“She’s waiting for him. You know she only says it to him.” Sam whispers. 

“Where is he?" 

When you next awaken Tony is gone and the others breathe a sigh of relief when you wake up. You had been out for several hours that they were unsure if you would ever wake up. You have gotten a bit of your strength back when you are next taken to Dr. Keigal he didn’t go about it his usual way. He seemed to be stuck. 

"It appears the cures are not working, in fact, it is killing you slowly. The cure has now become the poison in this case. We shall just have to find another way. You are so interesting my dear. This will be the most compelling thing I have ever done. I may even get published.” He starts to whistle, grabbing different things not really paying you any mind. He collects some samples and sends you on your way.

Dropped on the bed you turn to look at Sam, he is examining you trying to see if anything changed, not seeing anything he meets your gaze. 

“Wha… what.. what happened?” Your voice is sore from disuse. It comes out rust and shallows a mere whisper. It is so far removed from how you usually talk that it takes Sam a moment to collect himself. He starts with right where you left the picture. 

You listen to his story, the others input things as he goes in, completing the story. They even shared a smile when you learned that Steve had gotten up the courage to kiss Sharon. Your heart skips a little when you hear this. You meet Sams eyes after this and you can tell he knows what he said had hurt you.

“He’s going to come (Y/N) I promise.”

“I don’t doubt it, but I’ll stay here.” He tries to interrupt you, you shake your head. “No Sam we had a deal when he comes you make him leave me here. Not worth the risk to you guys I can barely move as it is. And…” You are choking up you remember what he had told you before you parted ways. “Steve knows what I am, I’ll just screw everything up again if I go.”

“You know he didn’t mean it like that, don’t give up please (Y/N).”

“Monsters belong in cages, heroes need to be free." 

Everyone looked at each other having absolutely no idea how to make you see that you were a hero, in more ways than one. If anything it was you that deserved to be out there the most. Sitting in silence, you all look at your present situation. Each was thinking of what they would do when they got out. You had nodded off again, once more muttering your phrase. 

"Why does she say that?” Scott asked. 

Clint responded, “She’s done that since I picked her up years ago, at first it was because she wanted people to know that she existed. She was kept by this mercenary group, stashed in a little closet all day. I think she did it to remind herself that she wasn’t going anywhere and she did, in fact, exist to others.”

Sam continued “it’s changed over the years though, we became family. She didn’t need to reassure her self as much anymore. She only says it to Steve now, but when I think about it its always as he’s leaving or during a mission.”

“What does it mean now?" 

You had awakened to hear Sam’s explanation. You turn to your side looking out "It meant I was there, I would be there to help whenever he needed me or how he needed me. Even if it meant getting captured or staying out of the way and not screwing up his plans." 

Sam and Clint looked at you in your bed torn to pieces both physically and mentally, there wasn’t much left of the person you used to be.  You had more convulsions through the night, no one ever came leaving you to ride them all through. Your skin was stretched and sunken into your face. The one that needed put the most was you.

Your heads all swung to the door when a cart could be heard rattling in. In stepped Dr. Kreigal. You tense up, the others start to growl. 

"Well hello my friends, I thought I would bring the fun to you. See what it is we do every day together. (Y/N), I hope you're ready I had time to go over your data and I want to try something new. I’m sure this will work.”

He rolls the cart into your cell and guards that came with strapped you down to your bed. The others were now shouting and banging against the glass, threatening him with anything they could imagine. Sam turns to grab something hoping to break the glass so he can get to you. Turning back around he finds Steve walking in, he rushes to the window pointing toward your open cell. He looks around to see the doctor uncaping the needle to start. Steve flew into action, pulling the doctor on away from you and into the wall.

The doctor let out an outraged scream, surging forward toward Steve. He tries to pry him away while Steve was undoing the straps around your legs. He twists and lands a punch once again sending the doctor back, but this time he doesn’t get back up, having been rendered unconscious. He goes back to finish loosening all the straps, once free he keeps you there while he liberates the others. Sam runs over to you and lifts you into his arms. You try a feeble attempt to push him back. Silently pleading with him to leave you here.

Sam doesn’t budge, “Hey you said Steve couldn’t save you, you never said I couldn’t. Let’s get you out of here." 

They all trudge out and into a waiting jet, a number of them are surprised to see T'Challa sitting in the pilot seat. Sam placed you down on a bench and began to strap you down for taking off. 

"No, please no.” You whimpered, flinching when he lifted the strap.

“We need to secure you for taking off then they can go. I promise no one will hurt you.”

You shake your head curling in on yourself to make it harder to strap you down. Seeing thus Steve walks over and picks you up, cradling you against his chest. He sits back down and straps himself in keep your firmly to his chest. “I got her.” Sam nods and walks away to find his own seat.

Take off is smooth and soon enough the plane levels out. Steve has started to stroke your thigh. The feeling relaxes you, so much you practically melt into him. Silence descends on the plane, the low grumble of the engine sending you to sleep. Steve feels the final bit of tension drain from you when he looks down, seeing your eyes closed in slumber.

He pulls you a little closer, he is having a hard time comprehending that he almost lost you. Even now looking at how frail you looked there was still a chance. He glances up to look at Sam the question already in his eyes.

“What happened to her?” He keeps his voice low, not wanting to wake you.

Sam looks down at you, “I don’t really know, she didn’t exactly tell us, but that quack doctor was pumping her full of something. It’s making her break down, she had convulsions all last night off and on wouldn’t be surprised if another one was on the way.”

He continues to tell him all the things that happened while they were in jail. After a moment of silence, Steve told them everything that had happened after their capture, even how Bucky was involved in Tony’s parents’ death. They were a little surprised but overall it wasn’t that unthinkable.

About halfway to their destination, your arm started to twitch. At first, Steve thought you were waking up, but the shake seemed to travel up your arm and spread through your body. He looks up panicked, “Sam what’s happening how do I stop this?”

“You don’t, just let it happen, hold her tight so she doesn’t hurt herself.” Steve immediately squeezes you, not that you could get any closer but he could try. It lasts about a minute, you quiet down and Steve loosens his arms just a little scared that you may begin again. He tears up how much pain you had gone through while you weren’t with him. 

“I’ll be here” you’ve mumbled as per usual now. “I’ll be here.” You shift closer to him. Gripping on to him, feeling his warmth and how solid he was you begin to wake up.

Very slowly you lift your eyelids and see a broad chest. You trail your eyes up to meet clear blue eyes above you. You start to tear up, he’s here, right in front of you. You can feel him, your not making him up. He’s back with you, tears make their way down your cheeks.

“I know I’m here,” h3 seems to read your thoughts exactly. “I’m not going anywhere. Please don’t cry I hate when you cry. Makes me want to cry.” He starts to wipe the tears away. Still telling you that everything was going to be ok. You continue to stare at each other for a while, caught in your own little bubble. Soon though your eyes drift shut with Steve looking down upon you.

“She’s been saying that a lot now in her sleep. I think she’s calling for you most times.” Sam says when he is sure she is asleep.

Steve doesn’t look up, “I know she really only says it to me and I enjoy it. It’s like our own little thing, but I know it means more than what she lets on." 

"You’ll have to ask her when she’s better.” They continue to stare at her in the quiet as they finish this journey. Both keen on protecting her from anything that might come your way. With your phase echoing around them, the plane soared through the air. “I’ll be here.”

@annadier

Am I Enough PT 3

Bucky X Reader

Summary: Bucky has hurt you, so you run away. Seeing no other option but the team can’t just give you up. It’s time for an intervention.

Warnings: angst but now fluff

A/N: Apologizes for the long wait. I was lacking words and didn’t want the story to fall flat. We finally get a back from the angst. Some fluff for you. Enjoy!

“Who knew? Did anyone know about this? Or did everyone know and just not say anything? No, they would have told me. I don’t understand, any of this. I love you and you still did all of it. No one forced you to do it, did my love mean so little to you that… No I don’t care it’s been done and from the looks of it, it’s been done many, many times. So why couldn’t you just end it either me or her. Did you really think you would get away with it? Be able to be with  both of us until you figured out which one you wanted the most?“ 

BUCKY POV

The team had been whispering to each other, making plans, when Bucky entered a room they hush up and send him glares. Not that he could blame them, he had screwed up. In fact he wasn’t sure how he could fix it. They had left this morning stating they had mission to go on, but he wasn’t allowed to come. He watched them leave turning back to the now near empty living quarters. 

He had taken Sam’s advice seriously, and from what he could see, was only (Y/N). Every place he sat and went was a memory of them or her. The bench in the park as he went on his run. She had been sitting there when he had gotten distracted and tripped landing face first in front of her. He remembered the snort that came out of her mouth quickly followed by her hand covering her mouth, before she quickly got up and offered him a hand up. He got pulled into the memory of their first meeting.

“Sir, are you alright?” She offered her hand to him, pulling him up. He brushed himself off. “Oh dear you’ve scrapped your knees let me find you a bandaid." 

While she turned he took her in, she wasn’t anything special to look at. Her (Y/H/C) hair fell in her face as she scrounged through her bag looking. From the brief glimpse as she pulled him up, her eyes were a nice shade of (Y/E/C). She was dressed causally nothing too fitted but not baggy, she looked comfy. 

 She started to pull things out of her bag still digging. Finally pulling out a bag she forced him to sit. Insisting she help him. If only she knew who she was talking to, a freaking soldier, and assassin that had always had to fix himself up. You had him patched and quickly packed you bag. Scurrung away from him, only leaving him with a view of your backpack. 

That darn bag it was almost attached to her, he remembered. The bag would change from time to time but you were seldom without it. She always said "You never know when you’re going to need something." 

More times than not she had something to help everyone. Tissues, wipes, and even a few games for when they got stuck somewhere. The team had quickly started to rely on her for the things you needed. (Y/N) became an essential for all Avenger outings, he recounted the many ways she worked to become each person’s friend. Creating something unique for each one, something that was strictly between the two. 

Bucky had tried to keep her a secret at first not really wanting to share his new friend with the team. She was something so normal and yet so perfect, the way she handled the things he told her, to treating him like everyone else. He was just another person, another friend she could have. 

So where had he got wrong where had he messed up and thought he could use you like he did? 

(Y/N) POV

You stretched, sore from sleeping in a slightly awkward position. Suddenly you felt arms around you tightening from you stirring. You crack your eyes open, heavy from the crying and itchy from dryness, your gaze is met by Steve. 

"Hey you’re awake." 

You nod moving to sit up. It’s then that there is a subtle noise filling your apartment. Turning your head you are met with the team stuffed in your room. Sam is even half in the bathroom to make room. You widen your eyes trying to take them in. You turn back to Steve checking that what you really see is true and not just a figment. Though from how each is behaving they are without a doubt real. 

They turn to look at you taking you in. "Not that I didn’t miss you guys but what are you all doing in my house?" 

"We’re on a mission!” Tony states stepping forward. 

“Huh, what kind of mission?” You ask, you didn’t think there was a Hydra base around here, but wouldn’t put it past them. 

“A really important mission. We are calling it Operation: Get (Y/N) Back and Beat Barnes Up For What He Did.” He states proudly. The rest if the team is shaking their heads obviously they hadn’t agreed to the name or all the details in the plan. 

You really had nothing to say to that. You couldn’t help but feel joy at the fact that they had come to get you, choosing you over Bucky. Steve presses on your shoulder turning your attention back to him. 

“Excluding what Tony said, you are our friend and we are here to help you. I know Bucky hurt you, I’m not condoning any of his actions but you didn’t have to leave like you did. Do you know how worried we were to suddenly find you had disappeared? You took all your things and left. I get you didn’t want to stay but you could’ve at least told us you were going.” He has put on his Captain America voice and firmly holding you so you don’t look away. By the end all you can do is nod, no you shouldn’t have done it. But there was a part of you that was glad you did. 

Tony claps his hands, drawing attention once again to himself. “Now that that’s all settled let’s get you packed up and back to New York.” The team starts to move, collecting items near them. 

“Whoa,” you stand holding up your hands to cease all further movement. “Who said I was going anywhere, I happen to have a two month lease and right now I don’t really feel like going back to New York. This is where I live now." 

They stare at you like you had grown a third head, "But the operation, we came to get you.” Tony says swinging his hands to indicate the team. 

“I know and I’m glad you did but,” you hold up you’re hand to stop Tony from speaking, “What he did to me doesn’t go away that quickly. He meant everything to me every single spot in Manhattan, heck all of New York City reminds me of him. I can’t just go back, let alone see him." 

Sam comes forward now, making Tony back up. "We aren’t asking for you to forgive him, we just hate to see you separate yourself and give up your life because of what he did.” He can see you getting agitated shaking your head. You couldn’t go back not yet. “(Y/N) let’s take a walk. Alright? It’s getting a little crowded and warm in here.”

You nod, taking the hand he has offered you. You head out walking to a park. You come to a bench sit down, Sam next to you. Quiet settles over the two of you, until you remember first meeting Bucky. 

“You know,” Sam perks up leaning toward you slightly. “Bucky and I first met in a park like this. I was sitting on a bench, I had a random day off and decided to take in a little nature. So there I am reading when he comes and trips over himself landing right in front of me. You should have seen him, faceplant right there, so of course I laughed. I felt bad and had to cover it up. When I pulled him up, man, the sun hit his eyes just right and it took my breath away." 

You got drawn into the memory, but continue to speak, forgetting for a moment everything that has happened since. 

"He was handsome, drop dead gorgeous, and I remember thinking that this must be some sort of prank because this doesn’t happen to girls like me. It happens in the movies or to the pretty girls. I had to look down, didn’t want to get caught up in something that could never happen. Huh, I should have kept to that thinking shouldn’t I?” She chuckled to herself before continuing. “I noticed he was bleeding so I went to my bag for bandaids. As luck would have it I couldn’t find them. So there I was embarrassing myself with this gorgeous man because I couldn’t find a stupid box of bandaids.

Sam laughs at this, this was so different from the way Bucky told the story. From his account you had saved his life single handedly with that bag of your. 

"I finally found them, had to make him sit down before I could put them on. He was stubborn wanted to do it himself. He didn’t quite know that I’m just as stubborn as he is. After I fixed him up I patted his leg and told him all good to go. It was then I realized I had put on princess bandaids. Man, if a person could die of embarrassment I would have then. I packed my bag up and scurried away before he noticed." 

Sam is laughing, your version was so much better than Bucky’s. He remembered that day, heck he was the one that pointed them out. He had complimented him on his taste in first aid bandages. He had just looked down saying someone had helped him. He went on to wear them for the rest of the day not caring about any other comments. 

You grew quite after your heart clenching painfully as you see how far you had come. This time it was Sam that broke the air. "I can’t possibly understand what you’re going through, but I’m here to help. I need you to believe that and to let me. Bucky wasn’t right in any fashion for what he did. Everyone knows that, but the reason they came here is because they didn’t want to lose you. They have lost so much, after knowing you and you becoming a friend to each of us, we aren’t going to just give you up. We are going to fight to make this right. You belong back with us. If you need time they will respect that, they may not agree but they will understand why.” He looks at you gauging your reaction to his words before continuing. 

“When you left it felt like we had lost someone all over again. That is hard, especially when in the business we are in one of may not come back. It is almost an unspoken rule to not get attached to anything or anyone outside of what we do. But you were an exception. You didn’t really give us an option for it either. I can’t count the number of times you have been there for me personally. Every hard mission, every life event you were a phone call or less away. I can’t thank you enough. I won’t lose that with you. I want … no need you to come back. I am though willing to wait for you because you mean that much to me." 

He leans over taking you into his arms, you realize that your crying. When you had left you hadn’t thought about how it would effect your friends. You needed them just as much as they needed you. You really didn’t have as close as friends as them anywhere else. 

"I’m sorry.” You sob to him clinging to his form. 

“Hey none of that you cry I’m going to cry. You don’t want to see me cry.” He rubs your back, gently shushing you. You relax in his grip as the tears slow but you don’t let go, not yet. You needed his comfort and his understanding. 

Time passes and you separate taking a deep breath. You look at him seeing his smile and triggering one of your own. 

“There’s my girl. Now let’s get you home and kick all these people out and grab some grub.” You chuckle and nod in agreement. 

Heading back to your apartment with Sam beside you, arm wrapped over your shoulder you knew you would be OK it would just take time. The best part was though was the friends you would have beside you. 

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Am I Enough PT 11

Bucky X Reader

Summary: It different working for Tony. This leads through to a very awkward situation over lunch.

A/N: Hey guys! Here it is Part 11 can’t really believe I made it this far. I hope you enjoy. Just forewarning it’s about to get pretty awkward in this chapter.

Warnings: awkward situations.

Y/N POV

Working with Tony was quite the experience. Yes, it kept you busy, but it also kept you on your toes. You never could figure out when he would ask for some random things. Or send you on “missions”, these were mostly you spying in people and getting gossip. At the end of the day though you couldn’t complain. You had asked for any kind of work and this was it.

Today’s task was to sit by the door and tell everyone that ventured near that no they couldn’t come in. That Tony was having a stroke of genius. He had you doing some paperwork as well to pass time.

It had been 3 days since you had breakfast in bed. Nothing as dramatic had happened since but the sweet gestures had continued. Post it notes could be found on various surfaces, all stating how gorgeous you looked, how hard you worked, and the ever constant presence you had in his life. You had to admit it made you blush when reading them. A few would have a single flower laying next to them. You collect them and place them in a cup reminding you of him still.

This particular day had a steaming cup of hot cocoa, with whip cream and chocolate shavings, it was sitting on your “desk” waiting when you arrived at the lab. Picking it up you see the chicken scratch scribble on the note, you know who it’s from.

Your day continues fending off any who venture neat and making good headway in the large stack of papers. You're not quite sure what caught your attention, but suddenly you look up locking eyes with none other than Natasha. You stare at each other for a moment before hers drop to the desk.

“Tony asked to see me.” She mumbles slightly as if the statement might insult you or hurt.

“Oh, let me check with him. He’s told me to ward off all people from the lab. Something along the line of having a breakthrough.” You stand and turn towards the door. You quickly turn back once you realized how that sounded. “Not that I don’t trust that he called you bit usually he lets me know.” You were your hands a bit to clear the misunderstanding.

“That’s fine no problem.” She shrugs letting you go on.

You quickly enter. Spotting Tony rummaging through a large bin. It appears as though wires are creeping up his arms and oil spreads over his cheeks and forehead.

“Hey Tony, Nat is here to see you.”

He doesn’t even look up merely dives deeper into the box. “Nope not right now, I’ve almost got it. Tell her after lunch maybe. In fact, why don’t you go as well.”

You freeze. Lunch alone with Nat. You hadn’t even been in a room alone with her since you got back.

“I…”

“Nope, don’t want to hear it. Go have lunch with her. Talk, eat, discuss ladies panties for all I care. Just don’t come back for at least an hour.” He dismisses you once more by turning his back on you for another bin.

You exit the lab and face Nat. “So he doesn’t want to see you until after lunch.”

“Gah, he told me to rush up here cause it was important.” She sighs before her head snaps up to look at you. “He wouldn’t. That arrogant son of a …” She pushes her hands through her hair.

“He said we were to go to lunch together. As he put it talk, eat, or discuss panties.” You cock your head and look at her expectantly.

“Really that what he went for that. Subtle.” She chuckles before looking up at you once more. “So wanna grab lunch then?”

It takes but a moment to decide. This could be a potentially good thing for you both. Of course, there was that big helping of doubt, the i-don't-know-if-I-can-go-there feeling, all this happened in about 2.4 seconds before you found yourself nodding your head in agreement.

You can see Natasha’ s shoulders raise. There is not in her eyes as she nods her head as well. She must really think she had no chance to make up with you. “Yes, you wanna go to that little cafe down the street that we like?”

“Yeah, I haven’t had them in forever.”

You head out. At this point, it grows a little awkward. Too much to be said, and no idea where to start. Nat never one to shy from a challenge starts with the innocent.

“How’s working with Tony? Must be a hassle most days.”

You chuckle, you couldn’t help but agree with her. “Yeah, mostly it’s just random things he wants me to do. Like you saw today, guard the door. One time he literally made me just sit in the lab and talk to him.”

She chuckles, “So not really working at all.”

“Nope. I don’t even know how to put it down on a resume when I update mine.”

“You could put Assistant I guess, or personal servant down. But the perks can’t be all that bad working for Tony?”

“No, not at all. He sends me home early most times. I don’t know we will see how this goes, but for now, I’m not looking for much else right now.”

She merely nods her head, sensing a dangerous line of thought ahead. “Well good, the best part has to be traveling 2 floors to get to work though.”

“I know right, I could wake up 5 minutes before if I wanted and still make it. I have to say the rooms are pretty obnoxious size wise. I think it’s bigger than all the apartments I’ve had combined.” Your both laughing at this.

Upon reaching your destination the conversation lulls and you are quickly seated with menus. Even though you had just gotten there, there was a pleasant feeling settling over you. You had missed this, your ability to go out with your best friend and enjoy a meal.

Your orders were quickly taken, leaving you two to stare at each other. You shift a little trying to think of another topic.

She takes the leap, no more like full hurtle. “Hey (Y/N), I know you hate me right now but I wanted to say I’m sorry for what I did.”

You bristle, she thought she could just slide this in now. That just cause you were out with meant you forgave her in any sense. You raise your hand cutting her off. “Stop right now, I certainly don’t want to do this now and especially hear. I don’t want your excuses or any other crap you wanna spill out. I’m here to have lunch maybe have a decent chat. But don’t think for a second that I’ve forgotten or forgave you for what you did. Are we clear?”

She merely nods her head, breaking all eye contact. To say it got even more awkward after that. Neither of you would look the other in the eye. Both tried to make idle chit-chat but it all tempered out quickly. The only saving grace was the food arriving. You both could appreciate the food. It was amazing, they made all their bread fresh in-house every morning, meats roasted the night before sliced to order. You both hum in appreciation to the meal.

The rest of the meal consists of food appreciation and talk of work. Soon your finished and paid to head out once more to the tower. You both board the elevator and ride to your respective floors. You exit first, Nat quickly follows.

“(Y/N), I meant what I said. I am sorry and I want to explain even if not now but eventually. I miss my best friend.” She pleads to try to make you understand.

“Maybe you should have thought of that before you started sleeping with my boyfriend. From where I am it seems like you could care less if I’m around. Like I said not now and not here.” With that you flip around stomping back to the lab, leaving a distraught Nat in your wake.

Upon entering the lab you make your way to Tony. With him being hunched over his worktop he didn’t see you coming. Your hand flew slapping him over the back of the head.

“Ow!” He yelps rubbing the spot. “What was that for?”

“For forcing me to have one of the weirdest, awkward lunches I have ever experienced!! That’s what.” You are fuming at him pushing your hands through your hair and pacing around the lab. “You know what she did? She had the audacity to think that apologizing in the middle of a restaurant was a good idea. I mean really?! Right there so everyone could see our dirty laundry. The nerve!”

Tony can only stare at you. He thought it had been a good idea. It gave you both an excuse to talk, to see how much you needed each other. Unfortunately, it seemed to have backfired rather badly. Of course no he had a very angry lady to console.

“I’m sure she meant the best. It is the first time you’ve been alone. She wants to make up. What’s wrong with that?”

“What’s wrong? The fact that she chose then and there to do it. Just because I went out with her doesn’t mean I’m forgiving her yet. She’s never said anything before now. As far as I know, she still wants him and just wants my approval. She’s made no effort to make up with me. What am I supposed to think?”

“Woah, hold up Sparky! I’ll have you know movie night last week was Nat’ s idea. She just wants you to make up with Bucky. She knows she screwed up, you just need to give her a shot. Just like Bucky is getting one.”

“She just… I just… I don’t know anymore. I need to think. I need to get out, space something. Gah, why is this so hard?”

“Well, you are free to go if you want. Go grab somebody and go adventuring or whatever you call it.” He waves his hand at you.

“Thanks, Tony!” You scramble for the door.

“Yeah yeah, beats getting smacked again.” Dismissing you for his work.

You head out searching for a free soul to go adventuring with. You find yourself bumping into a very free looking Steve.

“What are you doing?” You ask strutting up to him with determination to get out.

“Nothing, why?” He looks confused by the situation.

“Well let’s go!” You sweep around him and continue to the elevator.

“Go? Go where?” Still lost in the situation.

“Adventuring, duh!” Wasn’t it obvious?

He picks up the pace and follows you as the doors shut you both inside.

“Oh, I guess that works?”

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Masterlist

My attempt at a Masterlist not pretty but until I figure that part out here is what I got. ENJOY!!

SHORT STORIES

Worst Day Ever

Belated Birthday

My Girl

Why Just Why

What’s Mine is Yours

SERIES

I'll Be Here Series (COMPLETE)

Steve X Reader

PT 1 - PT 2 - PT 3 - Epilogue

Am I Enough Series (COMPLETE)

Bucky X Reader

PT 1  -  PT 2 - PT 3 - PT 4 - PT 5  - PT 6 - PT 7 - PT 8

PT 9  - PT 10 - PT 11 - PT 12 - PT 13 - PT 14 - PT 15 - PT 16

PT17 - PT 18 - PT 19 - PT 20 - Epilogue

Start of Something New (ongoing hiatus)

Bucky X Reader

Prologue - PT 1 - PT 2 -  PT 3 - PT4 -  PT 5 - PT 6 - PT 7 

Mission Gone Wrong (COMPLETE)

PT 1 - PT 2 - PT 3  PT 4 PT 5

I'll Be Here

Steve X Reader

Summary: You’ve always had a thing for Steve, since the beginning and like every perfect cliche story everyone but him knows it. From a questionable background with unusual gifts who could blame him for not noticing. Set during CA: CW, with a few changed details.

Warnings: ANGST,

A/N: I seem to have written quite a bit the last 2 weeks but I’ve loved all the responses I have gotten!!!! Thank you so much. Warning to you all this is not happy and ends in a cliffhanger, you have been warned! This is an edited version because I learned not to post when one is really tired and trying to rush things!

Supposedly this meeting was about setting boundaries and rules when it came being the Avengers. Not that that worked ever, waiting for someone to give a say on whether or not the situation was dire enough by a group of pompous and pretentious people was just stupid. This was going to bite them in the butt one day. Hopefully, it was before a whole lot of someones got killed.

You were relatively new to the group having been found by Clint, of course always picking up strays, while on a mission, you brought the destructive aspect to the group.

Having been sold and trained for a little known but dangerous mercenary group, you were eager to get out. Your time with the Devil’s Luck had been torturous. Each day they seemed to have a new way to scare you into submission. The only reason you lasted as long as you had was, you listened. Each week they had taught you a different bomb how to assemble and disarm it. They taught you all the components and at the end of the week you had to perform perfectly or death was the answer.

Clint had been sent in to disassemble the Devil’s. You were lucky to have Clint notice that you weren’t there willingly. It also helped your case that they would chain you every day in the room where they kept their poisons and other volatile explosives. They said it helped remind you of which components were which.

Focusing back to the meeting a new man has entered the room, Secretary Ross, gah even his name made you want to throw up, (he no longer gets a name shall only be known as he) he is staring down each and every one of them.

That is until he comes to you. You meet his glare head-on with one of your own. He shifts a little before looking away, you had won this round. It’s not surprising, due to the exposure of the different compounds, while being locked in your closet, your eyes had shifted from their usual (Y/E/C) to a murky purple, not exactly pretty or pleasant to look at.

He starts to blab on about how the group has “helped” so many people, but then he shifts and starts to blame them for everything ignore the lives saved in every incident.

You begin to feel your temper rising up, you shift in your chair. Looking around you can see everyone just taking it. You had been brought here years ago but had been too dangerous to be around others as Fury had told you. When you started training you had gotten to see them in action and vowed to be part of them.

Now that you were, they had quickly taken you in and treated you like family. You would not stand by while this prick tore into them. They were heroes that risked their lives and save millions more. They didn’t need all these rules or whatever crap this man wanted.

A hand on your thigh stops your internal thoughts and quells you anger a bit. Shooting your gaze over to see Steve; he was shaking his head slightly. Pretty much telling you to chill, then his thumb begins to rub circles in your thigh. Great now you can’t stay mad because you’re focusing on the feeling he is giving you, the butterflies erupt in your stomach.

It is a well-known fact to all you have a big thing for Mr. Steve Rogers. It’s also known that you will never make a move because you feel you are not good enough for him. Instead, you had chosen to become friends, you would take him however you could get him. You don’t often regret that decision mostly being that Steve was the greatest friend you could ask for.

You’re so in the moment that you don’t move until you hear Steve backfiring on Tony, his hand still rests on you but it is tense.

You focus back on the conversation. But don’t last long as you realize that this man had come in here and was now tearing the team apart. He is standing off to the side a bit as they argue, a small smile appearing on his face. He turns and leaves the room, the door gently closing.

You jerk up, making the chair roll hard into the wall startling everyone, you are seething, a low growl building its way up your throat. You head towards the door. “Where are you going?” Tony asks.

“I’m going to kill that man, I’m going to make him feel so much pain he’s going to wish he never even set foot in this building let alone mess with my family.” Still growling you turn back towards the door only to have a couple pair of arms hold you still.

“This won’t help anything if you kill him or threaten him,” Sam says while he and Clint attempt to pull you back into your chair. You were standing firm until another chair sputtered back. All eyes shifted to Steve.

“I have to go.” He quickly leaves. You know something is wrong you can tell just from his words. The men release you and you take the moment to follow Steve out. It wasn’t often that Steve didn’t jump in to help you or defend you so the simple fact that he didn’t prove that he just received the worse kind of news. You hoped it didn’t have to deal with Bucky, he had searched for so long now. Spending months with him and you digging for even the slightest mention of him.

You searched for him for a couple moments till a faint sniffling reached your ears. Opening the door to the stairwell you peak over the edge to Steve in the middle of the flight. You rush down, his shoulders are shaking while he holds his phone out. You glimpse on, ‘She’s gone, in her sleep.’ You gasp taking it in, Peggy was gone no wonder he was in pieces. It was worse than Bucky, not Peggy he had gotten her back.

You both often visited her in the care home. Spending hours talking, you getting all the really good stories to blackmail Steve with. Now she was gone, you wrap your arms around him and he takes advantage by leaning in cause you both to slip to the steps.

A few minutes later he looks up at you, those gorgeous blue eyes are rimmed in red and have a dark shadow in them as his world comes crashing down around him. “I have to go, I need to get packed and go to her. I… I didn’t get to say goodbye. I’ve lost her, again. Why did I lose her again?”

You nod your head, you had no idea why things were working out this way, fate was cruel. “Come on let’s get you home to pack.“ Taking his hand you get him up and lead him up to his room. You sit him down on the bed and pull out his small carry on bag. He glances up, "I can do it, thank you for taking care of me. Maybe you can come with me. I could the support and you were close with her as well.”

“I’ll be here.” You reply quietly to him.

At the funeral, Steve is one of the pallbearers for Peggy. You can see how upset he is even when he sits next to you in the pew. He grabs hold of your thigh again holding on tightly as the service begins. It was a lovely service, even when it came time for the family to speak. You were expecting a lot of tears, what you didn’t expect was the blonde woman, especially Steve’s neighbor to get up to speak. She was introduced as Sharon Carter. You feel Steve straighten and his hand leaves your thigh. You glance up to find his eyes zeroed in on Sharon as she shares about her aunt. Another Carter. He hangs off her words eyes meeting until the end and even still follows her with his eyes after she’s done showing great interest in what she was doing.

Your heart putters at the scene, Sam glanced over at your sharp inhale, checking to see what happened. Steve remained focused on Sharon missing your distress.

You had known he had been through too much to just try to jump into a relationship with. Then you had found out about Peggy and knew that nothing was going to happen for a very long time. You wouldn’t compete with someone you had no chance of winning against. From all the stories you didn’t mind either. Now here comes fate with another interesting Carter at Steve’s feet.

He excuses himself from you and Sam to go talk to her. “You shouldn’t let him go like that,” Sam comments to you.

“He is free to talk to anyone he wants to I’m not going to stop him.” You reply getting uncomfortable with the situation at hand. You wait for Steve to come back glancing over at them while they talk flinching every time he smiles at something she said.

“Yup, you're jealous.”

“Never said I wasn’t; just not going to let it affect my relationship with him.”

“Uh huh whatever you say.”

Sharon walks away only to have Nat walk up and talk to Steve. He gets a little tense talking to her but soon heads over sending you a small smile. “She’s headed to Vienna for the talks. Things are going to get dangerous now.”

“I know. I’ll be here.” You give him a small smile, while you give his hand a quick squeeze.

Steve and yourself had split up after the funeral, you had things that needed to get done in New York. Unfortunately, you should have stayed with him. You knew as soon as you saw the news and heard Bucky’s name you were ready to head right back in the quinjet only to be surrounded by men in black tactical gear. Their weapons were pointed straight at you no chance of escape. Then he came sauntering up an evil grin on his face. “Bring her with us, she’s a good bargaining chip for him”. They cuffed her and forced her onto the jet but strapped her down tightly.

Upon landing you are carted into a foreign building and kept under lock and key. Constant eyes watching you. It's rather boring just waiting around waiting for something to happen. Lucky for you they didn’t have a full understanding of your powers. While you were stuck in your prison with the Devil’s Luck, not only had your eyes changed but so had your very DNA. The strange combination of compounds mixed further and mutated your blood enabling you to use any poison or other toxins at will.

It was one of the reasons you never told Steve your true feelings. There was a lot you still didn’t know about your powers making you almost a ticking time bomb when your emotions got high enough you would leak fumes around you. This included the meeting before this whole mess. Steve was one of the few people able to calm you down almost instantly, dissipating anything in the air.

The other reason was Steve had been dealt a sad hand of cards in life, he deserved something normal including a normal love interest. It was why you weren’t exactly angry when he showed interest in someone. Of course, he could never truly have a normal life, house, kids, and dogs, but it would be better than the “toxic” relationship you would provide. You would never be able to let go fully always worried that you would hurt him. Heck, right now you were in a jail cell waiting to be used as bait against him.

As the guard passes by on his round a perfect opportunity to escape. You start to emit a gas known for bending the will. Perfect for your plan with the lack of appropriate ventilation, your cell was soon open and you walked out. You had the guard escort you all the way to the glass office which now held Steve, Sam, Tony, and Nat. There was another man with regal posture but you paid little head to him as you zeroed in on the man that continued to drive your family apart.

The door slides open and all eyes turned to you. You wave the guard off and stare at the man in front of you. Everyone is slowly rising. They can see the wisps of smoke radiating from you. Your eyes have now crystallized to a royal purple instead. Steve approached you arms raised slightly with his palms open toward you. You let him approach slowly trying to get your breathing and rage under control.

“Calm down, (Y/N). It alright. I promise we are just seeing things differently.”

“No! He is tearing my family apart and will not let him continue to do this.” You are screaming at this point. “He is the one that brought this on why can’t anyone see this. Turning us against each other. Making Wanda feel like everything is wrong with her when it's not. Making Tony take all the blame for the actions of others. I won’t allow it anymore!” The waves pulse out again darker and reaching out toward the man in question. He shirks back, finally grasping just how dangerous you are and what you could do, specifically to him at the moment.

He dares to speak, “Rogers, get the monster under control or I will.”

This made all heads turn towards him. “Excuse me,” the rage and venom could be heard clearly in Steve’s voice.

You heard me. Do something before I have to.”

With that, he takes his chance and leaves the room. They all continue to stare after him. You, on the other hand, were shocked at what he said that everything vanished. He had said the one thing you knew to be true but no one had ever said to you. Hearing it was worse and cut you deep; looking around you saw the angry expressions on their faces you’re not sure if it’s for you or the man that just walked out. Steve let’s out a sigh before turning back to you.

“I told you to calm down. You might have just made things worse. Now, why don’t you sit down and maybe don’t move.” He sounds slightly exasperated as he says this. You feel your heart clench at the tone. You merely nod your head.

“Well great, that fixes nothing,” Tony says glancing now between the two of you. At this point, Sharon comes in letting them know that the interrogation was about to begin. She walks up to Steve and you can see him relax, sending her a small smile. Well, another nail in that coffin. They look good together you notice, almost a perfect match; at least he doesn’t have to worry about her killing anyone. You sink lower in your chair but even with the small movement, you see people tense around you making you go even smaller.

Suddenly the lights flicker and everyone panics, Sharon tells Steve Bucky’s floor and with a quick turn he tells you to follow him closely, this is your escape. You decide to split up Sam and you are on modes of transportation out. Steve would grab Bucky and meet you outside the building.

You hijack a civilian car and go on your way. From your spot, you witness the chopper crash and finally see the guys surface. You hoist them in the car and head out of town to an abandoned warehouse district.

Placing Bucky into a giant vice you wait for him to wake up. You have sat as far away from them as you could with still being able to be seen. Steve eventually comes over and sits next to you.

“You could have killed someone today.” You nod, not trusting yourself to speak and know that nothing can help you now. You pray for a miracle. “It was stupid and reckless. You need to get this under control, you were doing so well before all this happened.” You can tell he is concerned but you fear it is more for others than yourself. You pull your knees to your chest wrapping your arms around them. “Secretary Ross has power, unfortunately, he’s using it against us. But, we will get through it, you can’t get involved though. I can’t trust you at this point, you will only make things worse.”

“I’m sorry.” your voice breaks failing to hold back any tears.

“That’s not going to fix anything,” he huffs frustrated. “If that was enough none of us would be in this situation.”

By this time tears are falling down, you face silently. He’s confirmed everything you’ve feared the most. Your losing control and nothing more than a monster that was going to hurt others. Worse yet, you knew he wasn’t ever going to feel the same way you did. He couldn’t trust you why would he ever think to love you.

Sam approaches, “He’s awake.” You wipe your tears unsuccessfully masking that you had been crying. Sam probably heard it all. Steve rises to his feet going to Bucky’s side. You look out the window searching for suspicious activity. Not daring to turn around and meet anyone’s eyes.

A while later you notice movement on the roof a few blocks down. “We’ve got movement, couple blocks down. We need to move.”

You continue to watch until Steve walks up, pointing out all the boogies to him, you both come to the same conclusion. You're going to need a diversion and a pretty big one. It's then that you come to understand your it. The rest needed to continue; this was the end of your story.

You turn to Steve, “Go, I’ll hold them off. You take Sam and Bucky with you do what you need to do.”

“We can’t just leave you here, who knows what they’ll do.”

“I’ll be fine, I’m stronger than I look. I won’t kill any of them I promise. I can hold off being a monster long enough to get you guys out.“ You tell him firmly, hoping he can trust you just enough not to screw this up.

"You’re not…”

“Stop. Please. Just go.” You don’t need to hear any more lies. You shoo him away, not bothering to say goodbye.

Steve nods once before turning to debrief Bucky. Sam walks up to you, “This is stupid and you know it. They won’t let you go.”

“Maybe that’s what I want.” You glance back at Steve talking quietly with Bucky, “Sam, don’t let him come after me alright? No one can forget I was ever here. Monsters are meant to be locked up so that’s where I’ll go.”

“You’re not a monster, not even close.”

“Please just promise me Sam.” you urge, they need to get out and soon.

“Fine, but promise me you won’t just give yourself up. You get out of here and come back to us.”

“Alright, now go. I can give you guys about 20 minutes head start.”

Steve looks back at you sadness written on his face, “I’ll see you later, alright?”

“I’ll be here.” You whisper with a small smile.

Steve turns and jogs out with the guys close behind him. Turning back toward the front you prepare yourself with each thump of men trying to get in. For the first time you feel like you lied to Steve, you knew you wouldn’t be here.

@annadier