Masterlist

Masterlist

My attempt at a Masterlist not pretty but until I figure that part out here is what I got. ENJOY!!

SHORT STORIES

Worst Day Ever

Belated Birthday

My Girl

Why Just Why

What’s Mine is Yours

SERIES

I'll Be Here Series (COMPLETE)

Steve X Reader

PT 1 - PT 2 - PT 3 - Epilogue

Am I Enough Series (COMPLETE)

Bucky X Reader

PT 1  -  PT 2 - PT 3 - PT 4 - PT 5  - PT 6 - PT 7 - PT 8

PT 9  - PT 10 - PT 11 - PT 12 - PT 13 - PT 14 - PT 15 - PT 16

PT17 - PT 18 - PT 19 - PT 20 - Epilogue

Start of Something New (ongoing hiatus)

Bucky X Reader

Prologue - PT 1 - PT 2 -  PT 3 - PT4 -  PT 5 - PT 6 - PT 7 

Mission Gone Wrong (COMPLETE)

PT 1 - PT 2 - PT 3  PT 4 PT 5

BELATED BIRTHDAY

Bucky X Reader 

Warnings: super long, angst, little self-doubt, and fluff

Summary: What happens when the team forgets your birthday? Including your best friend to have a dinner party to meet his new girl. 

A/N: I was super encouraged by all the love I got on my last story that I thought I would try again. Thank you all for reading these. This one is super long I let my feelings go and this is what can out of it. 

It’s not like you never told anyone your birthday, it was just a weird thing to bring up in conversation. You would also think a group of ex-assassins and superheroes would remember a little thing like that. So for the past week leading up to it, you had been waiting with bated breath for someone to ask if you had plans for that day. Each day rolled by with nothing, maybe they were going to surprise you. Nobody was acting suspiciously though, no talking that stopped when you walked into the room. Thursday rolled around with nothing and with 2 days till your birthday, you were excited when your best friend Bucky came into the living room. 

“Hey lady, you got plans Saturday night?" 

"No, none what so ever!” You had gotten so excited that you had blurted it out rather quickly. Almost shouting at the man. 

He rocked back at your tone surprised at your eagerness.  

“Awesome we’re all going out to dinner wanted to know if you wanted to join us? Just a little something nothing too formal." 

"Sure, yes I’ll be there" 

He nodded and walked back out. You squealed a little, they were doing something. This was going to be great. You got up and practically sprinted to your room. You had to look nice for your party. You laid out a couple different outfits, finally, you set your mind on an (F/C) dress you had been saving. You paired it with some sandals and called it a day. 

Finally, Saturday came and you spent the better part of the afternoon getting ready. When you walked out to join your friends. To say some jaws dropped was an understatement. You were known as the queen of casual; never really putting too much effort into how you looked so when you stepped out in you dress all dolled up, the boys didn’t know what to think and the girls were cheesing so hard their faces might have split in half. 

Sam recovered first. Strolling up to you he said, "Hey pretty lady, can I take you out to dinner?" 

"Ha, sure you can, as long as you can show this girl a good time." 

"Well, then I’m the guy for you.” He held out his arm and you hooked yours through. 

“What’s with the extra effort? You never dress up.” Nat asked curiously. 

“Just wanted to look good for this night.” You say blushing slightly.

Everyone finally headed out except Bucky, he was joining them at the restaurant. They made their way down the street to your favorite little Italian restaurant. Stepping in you’re immediately escorted to a private room for your group. There you see Bucky seated with a blonde bombshell chatting quietly with heads close together. Your heart stutters for a moment, yes Bucky is your best friend but you had always secretly hoped one day it would be more than that. Obviously, that wasn’t happening anytime soon because as soon as he noticed you all he started introducing his date. 

“Hey, guys this is Gabby.” He starts to introduce each one of you and everyone shacks hands with her. 

When he comes to you he says “This is my best friend, (Y/N). This is Gabby, we’ve been seeing each other for a few weeks.” You’re frozen in your spot staring at this girl. He had never mentioned her but from the smile on his face, you can tell it’s pretty serious. You snap out of it and reach your hand out greeting her. Suddenly you get the feeling that tonight had nothing to do with your birthday. 

For the rest of the dinner, you sit quietly, not really talking more just sitting and observing the things going on around you. But you always go back to Bucky and Gabby chatting; he had barely glanced your way the whole night and hadn’t even noticed what you were wearing but why would he when there was a gorgeous woman next to him. It had become very apparent, by the time the check was brought that this wasn’t for you but for the girl next to Bucky. Not a single person had remembered your birthday, but it was too late to say anything now. Glancing around you see all the happy faces of your friends, no one looks back at you all focused on their own discussions.

So you excuse yourself from the table, saying you need to use the restroom, but instead of heading there you head straight out the front door. If no one remembered you would celebrate on your own. You walk down the street trying to blink back the tears while shooting Sam a quick text letting him know you weren’t feeling well and you were headed back to the Tower. Stopping by a quaint looking bakery you stop in and grab a cupcake your favorite kind.

You finally back at the Tower, you go straight to the balcony on the top floor. You sit with your legs dangling over the edge and focus in the city spread out in front of you. Taking the cupcake out of its box you begin to sing “Happy Birthday” to yourself, tears start to fall about halfway through and your voice cracks then give out toward the end. You sit quietly and finish your cupcake.

A pair of black stilettos appear in the corner of your vision, you glance up to see Nat. She plops down next to you. 

“You like Bucky don’t you?" 

You kind of stare at her she knows that but not your Birthday? "So? Doesn’t matter he’s with Gabby.” You state your not mad, a little jealous but he can date who he wants. Yeah, you wish it was you so bad but who could blame him for picking her over you, a little pudgy vs. drop dead gorgeous. 

“So I think you two would be great together. You are selling yourself short." 

This was perfect; just perfect you were miserable about your missed birthday but now you were adding on Bucky. Each on its own you could deal with but together. Well together seemed a little more dismal.

You felt your heart break in half. Maybe this whole thing was a mistake, you weren’t meant to be a part of this team. Heck, it would definitely cause a rift if Bucky ever found out you liked him. A whole bunch of awkwardness there for sure. The rest of the team couldn’t even remember your birthday. You start to think back on all the times you had thrown a tantrum, when you were so tired your sarcasm came out and you said harsh things to the team. Maybe it was better if you left, you couldn’t hurt anyone that way. 

You knew in your head most of the things you were saying were false but it rang so true right now that you couldn’t help but believe it. You focus back on Nat coming to a final decision about everything.

"I know. Call it a coping mechanism or whatever; one learns quickly the way the world works. Him and I, never going to work out. He can never know though. Promise you won’t tell him?!.” You add some finality to your voice to emphasize your point to her. 

She merely nodded her head in agreement. Standing up you brushed off your dress and picked up the remains of your cupcake. 

“Now enough of my pity party. It’s time for bed and start a new day tomorrow.” You pull Nat up beside you and walk back inside. Before you part ways she gives you a hard hug. You make your way to your room scrolling through your phone looking for a certain email. Upon finding it you email Fury asking if the position was still open and that you were interested in taking it. Once done you stripped and showered then cuddled into bed to start a new day and a new life tomorrow. 

The next morning you wake up to a message from Fury saying the position was still open and that he would start the process to get your transfer ready. He did say that it might take a week or two to get it done and for you to move. Closing the email you get ready for your day. This changes things you look around your room you would have to start packing but secretively so they didn’t think anything suspicious was going on. You asked FRIDAY for some boxes to be delivered. If asked you could always say you were donating it. 

You head out to grab some food, telling yourself not to annoy anyone while you were there. You were walking on thin ice with the group already no need to leave on an even more negative note. Right before you enter you hear a giggle. Oh, Gabby must have stayed over last night. No need to keep her a secret when the whole team knows now. You make a beeline for the fridge, avoiding making eye contact with anyone. 

“Hey, (Y/N). Good morning”  Bucky calls cheerfully. You raise your hand above the door of the fridge and wave back. “She’s not much of a morning person, tends to be rather grumpy most of the time.” He explains laughing slightly. Though from his tone you can tell he is slightly embarrassed by your behavior in front of her. Dang, you’ve screwed up again, but it would be over they wouldn’t have to deal with you soon enough.

You exit the room but pause when Gabby asks “What does she do? Like her role on the team?”  

There’s a moment of silence you can’t tell what their faces look like whether it is shocked or confused, but the answer that follows tells it all. 

“She’s like a jack of all trades,” Tony answers hesitantly “she…. how do I explain this? She does what we need her to. She isn’t great at any one thing." 

Your breathing stops, that’s what they thought. You could hear grunts of agreement. You feel tears start to build again. No, not again, she wouldn’t start crying again. You raced off just after hearing Steve say, "Yeah that’s what she is a jack of all trades, master of none." 

What you didn’t hear was Bucky saying "But she’s the glue that holds us all together, the one that will become anything you need her to be. In a way, she’s the perfect friend, the perfect Avenger in a way." 

ONE WEEK LATER  

You had avoided everyone as much as you could the past week. Didn’t want to get in their way or piss them off if you could help it. No one seemed to miss you anyway. There was no one checking up or asking for you. So when Fury came by to confirm your transfer and ask some questions you were out doing other things. 

"Where is (Y/N)? I need her to finish this paperwork.” Fury stated to the group. 

“She’s out, I don’t think she won’t be back till later. Why? What kind of paperwork? Maybe we can help.” Nat strolls over to him glancing at the papers. 

“I need some basic information from her like her birthday, social, and a couple more things. Though now that I think of it I could just ask FRIDAY. Pull up all general info on (Y/N) (Y/L/N) for me including social and forwarding address if available." 

It popped up on the TV screen and Sam blurted out "Wait, a forwarding address, where is she going?” Starting to panic. 

“She is taking a position in England that we offered her a while ago she will be in charge of train agents in the European offices; getting them in the first-rate condition. She declined at first but changed her mind last week; she let me know she wanted to take it." 

 They all shake their heads there was no way you would do this not without telling them. Bucky is the first to jump up furious at what he was just told. 

"What do you mean, transfer, she belongs here with us. No way is she leaving.”  He is shaking with how upset he is. 

Fury really isn’t paying attention to the upset heroes instead he is filling in your information on the sheet he has. “Oh look at that she’s a year older, that will get confusing I’ve always hated right after a birthday you have to remember that someone’s older than they were. But I guess that’s how it works. I need to get her something maybe one of you could pick it out for me? I bet Tony here threw a wonderful party for her birthday? Huh." 

Again the team freezes, "Wait her birthday passed? When?” Steve asks confused as to how any of them could have missed it.

“(Y/B/D) it was on a Saturday this year the perfect time to do something.” He jokes but looking at their faces knows something is very wrong. “You forgot?! All of you Earth’s Mightiest Heroes forgot a team members birthday! What did you do?" 

Sam answers hesitantly "We meat Bucky’s new girl that night. That's why she had gotten all dressed up. Not to meet Gabby just her birthday.” He smacks his forehead with his palm. 

“She probably thought that we were going to celebrate her birthday. She didn’t do it for Bucky, she did it for herself.” Nat says. 

Bucky blinks “What do you mean for Me? Why would she do something like that for me?" 

Tony signs "Obviously because she likes you. Not that you noticed you were too wrapped up in Miss Prissy to notice how decked out she was." 

Unbeknownst to the team, you were traveling up the elevator and the door opened to the living room just as Bucky was saying ”(Y/N) likes me?“

You froze, he wasn’t supposed to know, he was never to find out. All eyes turned to the elevator as it dinged above you. Your eyes shoot to Nat asking for an explanation. She merely shook her head indicating it wasn’t her that had told him. You don’t want to know the look on Bucky’s face whether it was pity or disappointment. Instead, you shift it to Fury, walking up to him and grabbing the papers. 

"I’m assuming you just need a signature and then I’m all ready to go, Yes?” You quickly take the papers and sign them finalizing the deal. You hand everything back to Fury while still ignoring the group that stared at you. 

“Thank you. I’ll get this all taken care of. Oh, by the way, Happy Birthday. I hope you had a wonderful day." 

"I did thank you so much.” You smile slightly at him. Walking up you kiss his cheek. Now if jaws could drop even further they would because this groups would all be on the floor by now. Never before had they seen someone kiss Fury let alone get close enough without being stopped. You turn around and head for the staircase towards your room, Fury calls out “Don’t need to lie to me, sweetheart." 

You turn back to face him a sad but knowing smile on your face. "It was a good day, I got to spend the day relaxing and then went to dinner with my family. We had a good time I got to meet someone dear to my friend we are laughed and talked. No my life wasn’t celebrated and there was no cake, but I got myself the best cupcake a girl could ask for then celebrated on the balcony overlooking the city. Did all my dreams come true? No. Did I get the guy? Never going to happen. Am I happy for him? Of course, he deserves the best in the world, even when it's not me. I still got to celebrate even if it was just me. But sometimes the only person needed to have a celebration is yourself.” You turn back around and continue on your way to your room. 

Fury glances back to the group. They now had somber looks, “You all really screwed up this time, you're going to lose her because you couldn’t see something that was right in front of you. Even worse I’m losing her. You all best make it right. That’s my girl, and I will make your life miserable if she moves. I’m going to go lose these for a while, you best have it fixed before I find it again, you hear?" 

"Yes, Sir!” Comes the unanimous and frightened reply. 

“Heroes my foot, trying to drive my favorite away. Always screwing around with my plans and my people.” He's muttering as he exits the room into the elevator. 

They end up looking at each other no one quite knowing what to do. They had messed up before but all this seemed to pale in comparison. They had driven away one of their own. Wanda was the one to speak up first. 

“Bucky, how do you feel about her? I mean really? I’m not saying that what you feel for Gabby is fake but there has always been a deep connection between the two of you something that not even some married couples achieve. I’m also not going to force you to chose her either if Gabby makes you happy go for it. She is a sweet girl. Please though give it some thought." 

Bucky’s forehead wrinkled thinking through all the thing you had done for him from calming him down from his nightmares to just sitting in silence on the couch after a long mission neither of you saying anything you just letting him rest his head against your thigh as you run your fingers through his hair. He thought of the times you made him laugh at some dumb thing you did. He also remembered the way you interacted with everyone.

Each remembers everything you had done and what stood out the most. You made yourself tailored fit to each person. With Bruce, you would make a nice cup of tea before snuggling in With a good book. Asking every once in a while how it was. You were the steadiness that he craved. For Tony, you would fiddle around in his lab handing him tools as he needed them and having late night dance off parties when the guilt and shame of the past prevented him from sleeping. 

Nat was a little difficult since you tended to have opposite tastes but there you were training with her, learning to fight but also to dance. You were never going to be a Ballerina but you liked to think that Nat could see that all that she had learned wasn’t bad she could use it to help others. Of course with Clint, it was nothing but fun and games pranking all that you could find and run away giggling. When Thor was around you would traverse this Midgar and explore the weird traditions, you humans had, Thor’s words, even if it was simply grocery shopping. At this point, Wanda and Vision were a package deal one was hardly away from the other. With them, you spent your days cooking and coming up with new recipes. But also trying to outsmart Vision the best you could. 

Sam was your go-to buddy, watching movies, playing video games, or even just chatting about how life was going. Hanging with Steve was always interesting, you had appointed yourself list completer. You did just about everything on the list with Steve and if you couldn’t you set it up for him, the where, when, and even sometimes the who. 

Bucky though, it was everything, every day he could think of a memory with you. A rock was how he would describe you; a constant person that whenever he needed something you were there to provide. Your random adventures out into the world with no real destination in mind. Now just the thought that he wouldn’t see you for even more than one day was terrifying. He pulls himself from his thoughts to see the group looking at him. 

"I can’t lose her. I don’t know what I would do without her.” His voice is trembling with fear of what may happen. 

“Then you need to go talk to her after we need to talk to her, so get her down here. We need to apologize and make her see that she is beyond needed here.” Wanda is firm, making it clear that failure is not an option. 

Bucky nods and begins his way up the stairs, towards your room. When he reaches the door he raises his hand to knock but hesitates, he doesn’t know what to say, how is he going to get you to stay after everything the group has put you through. You could leave, you had every right, they had taken so much from you never giving anything in return always just expecting more. No, not now he would give you anything you wanted. You were going to stay right here, with him. He knocked, this time determined to make you see where you truly belonged. 

The door cracked open, revealing tears traveling down your face and a pair of eyes revealing a shattered heart. You stare at him for a moment taking him in. You turn away leaving the door open knowing that he isn’t going to leave even if you wanted him to. He came into a room of boxes and thing scattered about. His hear restricted again it was real you were leaving. 

“You can’t go.” He blurted almost shouting it.  

You turn towards him. “Why not?" 

You’re tired, exhausted really you had cried yourself to sleep too many times this week. Ready to put the whole thing behind you and move on. So when you spoke it was devoid of emotion. This scared Bucky, even more, you had never spoken to him or anyone else this way. 

"I…we need you here. No, I need you here. You help keep us all together.”

“Funny thing about Jack of All Trades, yeah we may be good at almost anything we do; we are also very replaceable. You’ll find someone else just as good or even better. You think you need me now but just wait a couple of weeks you’ll forget I was even here." 

"No, we won’t. You are much more than that to us. None of could really function without you here. Who do you think keeps all the evil from crushing us. You see us as more than just superheroes. Please don’t go." 

You sign and continue to pack things into the boxes. Fear takes over Bucky as he watches to the point where he walks and tips the box spilling its contents on to the ground. 

"What are you doing!!!” You scream at him. 

“I’m not letting you go. I … I need you here with me. Not anyone else just me. I’m going to unpack everything you do so stop right now." 

"You’re making a mess that’s what you’re doing. You stop.” Exasperated at this fool. You had just finished packing those, but he continues to dump out your boxes. “Knock it off.” He keeps going. He has about two boxes left before he has effectively unpacked everything you have done. “Alright let’s talk, just stop trashing my room." 

He freezes mid tip, a smile grows on his face. He puts the box right side up. You plop down on your bed and pat the space next to you. He sets himself down and angles himself so he is facing you. 

"Why should I stay, and don’t just say cause you need me?" 

"I do need you, but the others need you as well. I didn’t realize how vital you are to me until you were walking away from me. You keep the nightmares at bay. You make me get up in the morning afterward even when I feel like the weight of everything I’ve done will crush me. No one else does that for me." 

"Wha..  what about Gabby, she makes you happy? I’ve never seen you smile like that not even when we are together." 

"That’s because it’s not that real. You aren’t paying enough attention to me when we are together. I can’t smile when we are together. Gabby is sweet but half the time I feel I have to hide part of myself so that I don’t scare her. She’s sweet and caring but she is not you. I know you would go to the ends of the earth for me and kick anyone’s butt that even insinuates that I’m not meant to be here. I don’t get that from you." 

Staring at him now, you can see how much he means with what he is saying. Why had he never said this before? Why Now? 

"I know you think that I might just be saying this because I don’t want you to leave” you not your head, “but I mean it. It’s cliche but I almost list you and I realize that I do care for you. I.. I love you, I can’t live without you. I can see a life without Gabby but without you, I can’t even wrap my head around it." 

He pauses looking at your face to see your reaction. Hoping that it is positive but scared that it’s too late for all this. You sit for a moment taking everything he has just said. 

"I… Why couldn’t you say this earlier. I just signed my transfer. It’s official now. I love you too but.." 

"Well, Fury may have chewed us out and "lost” your paperwork till we made this right with you.“ 

You can’t help it now you let out a laugh, Bucky can’t help but smile at the sound he missed it and even more, he didn’t want to lose it again. He tackled you to the bed, wrapping his body around. You wiggled trying to escape while laughing some more. He then begins to poke you in your side, causing you to laugh even harder. 

"Stop, please I’m staying, I’m staying I promise.” You’re trying to catch your breath while wiping tears away from your face. You snuggle deeper into him, enjoying the warmth and the pleasantness of the embrace. You stay like that for a while just reveling in each other. 

“Good,” he likes where you are at, right here in his arms, “we do need to move sometime. I have been tasked with bringing you downstairs so the others can talk to you. They feel bad for missing your birthday. I feel really bad, I’m your best friend and I couldn’t even remember something that important. Give me a day and I’ll make it up to you, anything you want I’ll do it. It’s your day." 

You merely nod, then unravel from him before standing up to head downstairs. He grips the side of your face taking his thumbs and wipes the remaining tears from your eyes. He kisses your forehead before releasing you to go. You take a deep breath and head out, Bucky lingers pulling out his phone to make things right. 

You head down the stairs to the living room, you go to grab Bucky’s hand for support to find him missing. Looking back around and continue down taking deep breathes. Looking into the living room you see that they are running around setting up balloons and streamers. Tony was trying to dictate where everything went and how everything looked. Wanda and Vision, were of course baking in the kitchen they were assembling the cake decorating it as best they could.

Everyone is so busy they don’t notice you on the stairs. You sit down and continue watching them, wondering how you ever thought you could leave these people. Tony pulls up the security video from the day that Gabby asked what you do. You watch them defend you and what you do, no one had a single thing wrong with you. 

You feel the tears gather again, you feel Bucky come up behind you wrapping his arms around you from the step above. All of a sudden the cake starts to tip over and a cry rings out from Wanda which causes Clint to startle on the ladder sending streamers falling and balloons to start popping. You smack a hand over your mouth to stop from laughing. It doesn’t last long as Tony starts running around before slipping on some decoration boxes he falls on his butt. The cake finally tips and falls across the counter. And Steve stares at everything happening. You can’t help it you busy out laughing bending over in half with a stitch growing in your side. You can feel Bucky behind you cracking up as well. 

  They all look oversee you collapsed on the stairs laughing. One by one they start laughing, each caught up in the moment. They all taper off when they hear a ding from the elevator. Fury steps out and looks around. 

"I don’t need these correct?” He held up your papers. All eyes shot to you. 

“No sir you don’t. They're stuck with me now.” You shake your head as cheers go up. 

Bucky leans in to whisper in your ear “I broke it off with Gabby, I’m all yours.” You shoot a look back at him just to confirm what he said, “Till the end of the line.”  You go back to looking at your friends as they stumble back up. This was the best birthday you could have asked for. 

“Happy Birthday (Y/N)!" 

Am I Enough PT 3

Bucky X Reader

Summary: Bucky has hurt you, so you run away. Seeing no other option but the team can’t just give you up. It’s time for an intervention.

Warnings: angst but now fluff

A/N: Apologizes for the long wait. I was lacking words and didn’t want the story to fall flat. We finally get a back from the angst. Some fluff for you. Enjoy!

“Who knew? Did anyone know about this? Or did everyone know and just not say anything? No, they would have told me. I don’t understand, any of this. I love you and you still did all of it. No one forced you to do it, did my love mean so little to you that… No I don’t care it’s been done and from the looks of it, it’s been done many, many times. So why couldn’t you just end it either me or her. Did you really think you would get away with it? Be able to be with  both of us until you figured out which one you wanted the most?“ 

BUCKY POV

The team had been whispering to each other, making plans, when Bucky entered a room they hush up and send him glares. Not that he could blame them, he had screwed up. In fact he wasn’t sure how he could fix it. They had left this morning stating they had mission to go on, but he wasn’t allowed to come. He watched them leave turning back to the now near empty living quarters. 

He had taken Sam’s advice seriously, and from what he could see, was only (Y/N). Every place he sat and went was a memory of them or her. The bench in the park as he went on his run. She had been sitting there when he had gotten distracted and tripped landing face first in front of her. He remembered the snort that came out of her mouth quickly followed by her hand covering her mouth, before she quickly got up and offered him a hand up. He got pulled into the memory of their first meeting.

“Sir, are you alright?” She offered her hand to him, pulling him up. He brushed himself off. “Oh dear you’ve scrapped your knees let me find you a bandaid." 

While she turned he took her in, she wasn’t anything special to look at. Her (Y/H/C) hair fell in her face as she scrounged through her bag looking. From the brief glimpse as she pulled him up, her eyes were a nice shade of (Y/E/C). She was dressed causally nothing too fitted but not baggy, she looked comfy. 

 She started to pull things out of her bag still digging. Finally pulling out a bag she forced him to sit. Insisting she help him. If only she knew who she was talking to, a freaking soldier, and assassin that had always had to fix himself up. You had him patched and quickly packed you bag. Scurrung away from him, only leaving him with a view of your backpack. 

That darn bag it was almost attached to her, he remembered. The bag would change from time to time but you were seldom without it. She always said "You never know when you’re going to need something." 

More times than not she had something to help everyone. Tissues, wipes, and even a few games for when they got stuck somewhere. The team had quickly started to rely on her for the things you needed. (Y/N) became an essential for all Avenger outings, he recounted the many ways she worked to become each person’s friend. Creating something unique for each one, something that was strictly between the two. 

Bucky had tried to keep her a secret at first not really wanting to share his new friend with the team. She was something so normal and yet so perfect, the way she handled the things he told her, to treating him like everyone else. He was just another person, another friend she could have. 

So where had he got wrong where had he messed up and thought he could use you like he did? 

(Y/N) POV

You stretched, sore from sleeping in a slightly awkward position. Suddenly you felt arms around you tightening from you stirring. You crack your eyes open, heavy from the crying and itchy from dryness, your gaze is met by Steve. 

"Hey you’re awake." 

You nod moving to sit up. It’s then that there is a subtle noise filling your apartment. Turning your head you are met with the team stuffed in your room. Sam is even half in the bathroom to make room. You widen your eyes trying to take them in. You turn back to Steve checking that what you really see is true and not just a figment. Though from how each is behaving they are without a doubt real. 

They turn to look at you taking you in. "Not that I didn’t miss you guys but what are you all doing in my house?" 

"We’re on a mission!” Tony states stepping forward. 

“Huh, what kind of mission?” You ask, you didn’t think there was a Hydra base around here, but wouldn’t put it past them. 

“A really important mission. We are calling it Operation: Get (Y/N) Back and Beat Barnes Up For What He Did.” He states proudly. The rest if the team is shaking their heads obviously they hadn’t agreed to the name or all the details in the plan. 

You really had nothing to say to that. You couldn’t help but feel joy at the fact that they had come to get you, choosing you over Bucky. Steve presses on your shoulder turning your attention back to him. 

“Excluding what Tony said, you are our friend and we are here to help you. I know Bucky hurt you, I’m not condoning any of his actions but you didn’t have to leave like you did. Do you know how worried we were to suddenly find you had disappeared? You took all your things and left. I get you didn’t want to stay but you could’ve at least told us you were going.” He has put on his Captain America voice and firmly holding you so you don’t look away. By the end all you can do is nod, no you shouldn’t have done it. But there was a part of you that was glad you did. 

Tony claps his hands, drawing attention once again to himself. “Now that that’s all settled let’s get you packed up and back to New York.” The team starts to move, collecting items near them. 

“Whoa,” you stand holding up your hands to cease all further movement. “Who said I was going anywhere, I happen to have a two month lease and right now I don’t really feel like going back to New York. This is where I live now." 

They stare at you like you had grown a third head, "But the operation, we came to get you.” Tony says swinging his hands to indicate the team. 

“I know and I’m glad you did but,” you hold up you’re hand to stop Tony from speaking, “What he did to me doesn’t go away that quickly. He meant everything to me every single spot in Manhattan, heck all of New York City reminds me of him. I can’t just go back, let alone see him." 

Sam comes forward now, making Tony back up. "We aren’t asking for you to forgive him, we just hate to see you separate yourself and give up your life because of what he did.” He can see you getting agitated shaking your head. You couldn’t go back not yet. “(Y/N) let’s take a walk. Alright? It’s getting a little crowded and warm in here.”

You nod, taking the hand he has offered you. You head out walking to a park. You come to a bench sit down, Sam next to you. Quiet settles over the two of you, until you remember first meeting Bucky. 

“You know,” Sam perks up leaning toward you slightly. “Bucky and I first met in a park like this. I was sitting on a bench, I had a random day off and decided to take in a little nature. So there I am reading when he comes and trips over himself landing right in front of me. You should have seen him, faceplant right there, so of course I laughed. I felt bad and had to cover it up. When I pulled him up, man, the sun hit his eyes just right and it took my breath away." 

You got drawn into the memory, but continue to speak, forgetting for a moment everything that has happened since. 

"He was handsome, drop dead gorgeous, and I remember thinking that this must be some sort of prank because this doesn’t happen to girls like me. It happens in the movies or to the pretty girls. I had to look down, didn’t want to get caught up in something that could never happen. Huh, I should have kept to that thinking shouldn’t I?” She chuckled to herself before continuing. “I noticed he was bleeding so I went to my bag for bandaids. As luck would have it I couldn’t find them. So there I was embarrassing myself with this gorgeous man because I couldn’t find a stupid box of bandaids.

Sam laughs at this, this was so different from the way Bucky told the story. From his account you had saved his life single handedly with that bag of your. 

"I finally found them, had to make him sit down before I could put them on. He was stubborn wanted to do it himself. He didn’t quite know that I’m just as stubborn as he is. After I fixed him up I patted his leg and told him all good to go. It was then I realized I had put on princess bandaids. Man, if a person could die of embarrassment I would have then. I packed my bag up and scurried away before he noticed." 

Sam is laughing, your version was so much better than Bucky’s. He remembered that day, heck he was the one that pointed them out. He had complimented him on his taste in first aid bandages. He had just looked down saying someone had helped him. He went on to wear them for the rest of the day not caring about any other comments. 

You grew quite after your heart clenching painfully as you see how far you had come. This time it was Sam that broke the air. "I can’t possibly understand what you’re going through, but I’m here to help. I need you to believe that and to let me. Bucky wasn’t right in any fashion for what he did. Everyone knows that, but the reason they came here is because they didn’t want to lose you. They have lost so much, after knowing you and you becoming a friend to each of us, we aren’t going to just give you up. We are going to fight to make this right. You belong back with us. If you need time they will respect that, they may not agree but they will understand why.” He looks at you gauging your reaction to his words before continuing. 

“When you left it felt like we had lost someone all over again. That is hard, especially when in the business we are in one of may not come back. It is almost an unspoken rule to not get attached to anything or anyone outside of what we do. But you were an exception. You didn’t really give us an option for it either. I can’t count the number of times you have been there for me personally. Every hard mission, every life event you were a phone call or less away. I can’t thank you enough. I won’t lose that with you. I want … no need you to come back. I am though willing to wait for you because you mean that much to me." 

He leans over taking you into his arms, you realize that your crying. When you had left you hadn’t thought about how it would effect your friends. You needed them just as much as they needed you. You really didn’t have as close as friends as them anywhere else. 

"I’m sorry.” You sob to him clinging to his form. 

“Hey none of that you cry I’m going to cry. You don’t want to see me cry.” He rubs your back, gently shushing you. You relax in his grip as the tears slow but you don’t let go, not yet. You needed his comfort and his understanding. 

Time passes and you separate taking a deep breath. You look at him seeing his smile and triggering one of your own. 

“There’s my girl. Now let’s get you home and kick all these people out and grab some grub.” You chuckle and nod in agreement. 

Heading back to your apartment with Sam beside you, arm wrapped over your shoulder you knew you would be OK it would just take time. The best part was though was the friends you would have beside you. 

@veronicalei @ohlookfanfiction @theassetseyeliner @bustanut2k17 @luckynumber1213 @owhatshername1 @chipilerendi @caelestiside @anbrax5553 @fandom-writes @boundtomyfate @annie-are-you-okay @megs4real @marvelous-imagining @mizzzpink @coffeeismylife28 @yknott81 @chameerah @stevette60 @genlovesdcb @loveyourselfcreateyourself @winter-in-wakanda @buckyappreciationsociety

START OF SOMETHING NEW - Prologue

A/N: I’m starting another series not sure how it will be received. A little angst buys mostly a reader learning to love herself and that the universe isn’t out to get her.

Bucky X Plus size!Reader

Warnings: Slow burn, like seriously slow, self-depreciation

You had always wanted to get married. Wanted a family, people to take care of and get care from. There must be something wrong with you though because no one ever looked your way. It never happened to you, no double glances because you looked gorgeous. No one ever flirted with you, maybe you were broken in some fashion.

For a while, you had convinced yourself that it was ok not to have anyone. Every once in a while you had to face it. No one wanted you. It came in the form of an off-handed comment from a friend or when hanging out and people paired up leaving you to shuffle from pair to pair trying not to intrude on them too much.

You couldn’t pinpoint exactly where you fell short. You certainly weren’t fit, round, pudgy, potato impersonator. You weren’t ugly no but you weren’t beautiful. A talent of yours was making people laugh, generally enjoying your presence. But at the end of the day, you had to believe that no one should be forced to deal with you. It was better this way.

It didn’t really help that you were somehow friends with the hottest group of heroes the world had ever seen. You weren’t even sure how it happened in the first place. You work in the Compound but you weren’t an agent. You were a cook in the cafeteria for the rest of the agents. Not the most noticeable, but Tony had found you cooking and cleaning late in the evening. Demanding food, you fed him and like a pigeon he kept coming back looking for more.

It seemed he spread the word because every once in a while another new face would appear seeking the same. You turned into a listening ear as well. A silent partner that would allow them to get everything off a chest and return to their lives.

In essence, you were a support character, not only in everyone’s life but yours as well. You knew though that if that was all you were meant to be then you would be the best support you can. Just because you didn’t get a happy ending doesn’t mean you could help your friends reach theirs, whatever role you had to be.

@justreadingfics @buckyappreciationsociety @veronicalei @ohlookfanfiction @theassetseyeliner @marvelous-imagining @metalarmproblems

Am I Enough PT 6

Am I Enough PT 6

Bucky X Reader

Summary: The team gets called back for a mission, but Sam stays back. Not only to keep an eye on you but also try to convince you back.

Warnings: angst fluff and Sam freaking Wilson!

A/N: Hello All! This chapter may seem a little rushed wanted to move the story along to the good stuff. Also, Sam Wilson never gets enough love in stories so I’m loving up on him. Thanks again for all the comments and messages I’m really enjoying reading them.

“What do I do now?”

Y/N POV

It seemed to be a blur of events after your announcement, Tony was calling the jet getting it ready to go. Steve had a blank stare on his face, trying to convince himself that what he just heard wasn’t true. Sam and Wanda were attempting to talk them down and focus, snapping their fingers in their faces. Thor was hugging you close telling you that everything would be OK, that he would avenge your honor. Vision was standing around taking the group is not really helping or hindering anyone.

It seemed to wind down when all their phones began to ring and vibrate. Tony quickly accessed his phone and read the message. “Looks like we have a mission guy, trouble in Europe again.” He rolls his eyes and puts his phone away. “This mission is on hold until we get back. Sam you’re staying here, don’t want this one,” he is waving his hand directly at you. “Wandering off or convincing herself that she is staying in this disconnected from humanity town.”

Sam merely nods his head. “Woah, hold on I don’t need some babysitter.” You protest, turning to Tony, glaring at Sam as well, shaking your finger at him. “I’m happy you all came to check up on me but you have a mission to do, don’t just leave Sam behind because you think I’m not coming back.”

Tony is no longer listening to you. Instead, he is on the phone again checking on trip details. You sigh looking around for someone to back you up. Of course, they all agree with Tony, nods go around at the apparent sound decision. It’s part of the reason that they were here.

“Give it up kiddo,” Clint finally speaks up, you had forgotten he was here, “just let him have this, he was pretty torn up when you left.” You can only nod and turn to Sam.

“I guess you are bunking with me, I hope you don’t mind sleeping on the floor.”

He chuckles and swings an arm around your shoulder. “Yes, finally a roommate I don’t mind having. Also the prettiest one I think I have ever had.”

You giggle and wrap your arm around his waist. “Let's see them off and then find you some things to do while I work, I certainly don’t have anything for you now.”

Seeing them off was a tearful event, they each had their own fears of you not coming back. More so that this might be the last chance to convince you to come back. To say there was a lot of pressure on Sam was an understatement. Each one drew him away to talk and each time he merely clapped them on the shoulder and sent them on their way. They all have you gone crushing hugs, each one lingering as they whispered encouragement and love into your ear.

Tony was the last to come up, he didn’t reach for you but begins to lecture you making sure you took care of yourself. You roll your eyes and cut him off by pulling him in. It takes him a moment but he returns the hug, pulling you as close as he can.

“Thank you, Tony, for looking out for me. I know you are worried I’m not coming back but I will, in my own time, granted. I can’t just leave you alone for too long, you’ll get into trouble.”

He chuckles, “Too late for that sweetheart, why do you think I’m here.” He sneaks his hand in your pocket trying to slide his credit card in. You stop his hand. “Please just let me have this,” he whispers, getting slightly choked up, “I want to at least know that if anything happens you’ll have enough to come back to me. My last bit of taking care of you?” You release him to continue. You squeeze him once more before letting him go.

You both have tears in your eyes. He wipes them away quickly, “Darn this fresh air, I need some smog-clogged streets, making my eyes water.” You shake your head and smile. With that you see them fly off once again to save the day.

You turn to Sam and head to the car. The car ride is fun, you have cranked the music up and rolled the window down. Singing at the top of your lungs. This was your favorite thing about Sam, his ability to make you feel that everything was alright and that no matter what you wanted to do, you could do it and he was more than up for it.

You head for the mall, it had just about everything you could ask for. You make a game out of your time, a scavenger hunt of sorts. Find the tallest heel ended with Sam strutting down the aisle in a pair of 8-inch yellow stilettos. Find the biggest TV, you grabbed the popcorn and a bean bag chair watching the aquarium on the screen. The last was the most unhealthy snack you could find, you shared a triple chocolate chunk fudge ice cream sandwich. It was so sweet you both only got about 4 bites in each that you had to stop.

The best part was, Tony, footed the bill for everything. You ended up with a trunk full of stuff, a TV with a game console with any and every game Sam could possibly play. He had movies galore and you even talked him into a few books for educational purposes, as you called it. To finish it off you bought another blowup bed with all bed necessities.

Dragging it all home you set everything up while waiting for the pizza to arrive. This had been the best day ever, it was rare you got to spend this much time with Sam.you started to wonder why that was when you had so much in common. You could do this all the time with him. When the pizza arrived you both sat on the floor each with a remote control in your hand.

“Sam?” You glance at him while playing COD together, he grunts in question. “Thanks.”

Again he grunts, before shifting his eyes. “Thanks? For what?”

“For being here. I know I haven’t been the most pleasant person to be around. You haven’t even asked what happened yet. You know the who and what but not all the details.”

Sam pauses the game setting his controller down. “You don’t have to thank me for that. I’ll always be here for you. What do you think friends are for?”

“I know that and that’s why I’m thanking you. I mean I cry myself to sleep every night, I get lost in my head during conversations, you shouldn’t have to put up with that. The fact that you do means a lot to me. I’ll get better I promise.” You’re sniffling by the end, wondering why you ended up with such a great friend.

“Ok, ok, you’re welcome. Like I said I’ll always be here for you. As for everything else, we’ll work through it. Everything will get better. You’re hurt and scared but I’m not leaving you anytime soon. If you need to cry, go for it. Drift all you want, I’ll draw you back in, but never forget I’m right here.” He pulls you into a hug kissing your forehead.

He pulls back and you both share a smile. “Now, pick up that remote and let me kick your butt.”

“Oh, you’re so on!”

The night continued on with fun and laughter and barely a thought towards Bucky. It was perfect and for the first time since this, all started you slept peacefully not a tear escaped you.

The next few days formed a pattern, work and coming home to dinner and movies or games. You started to relax in your new environment, Sam made it easier as well, talking late into the night about what was happening. The one thing you did avoid was Bucky and anything to do with him. You would tense up and change the subject when brought up. Sam seemed to catch on rather quickly and soon you weren’t talking about him at all.

The team hadn’t called since they left, but as the week went by you started to miss them. It was enough to make you want to go back. Though a bonus would be if he wasn’t there of course. All in all, you were still up in the air, Sam never commenting directly, just mentioning the places and things he missed in New York.

As if the universe got tired of you flip-flopping, it decided to make the choice for you. You had gone out to dinner, a nice little pizza joint, while you were strolling back you saw 2 fire trucks fly by. You don’t think much of it until you drew closer to your apartment. Flames engulfed the 3rd floor just above your apartment. You stop staring at the building praying it wasn’t so that maybe you had gotten your building confused. This was not the case. The flames shot high into the sky blasting out the windows.

Sam turns you away from the scene burying your face into his chest. Tears began to form and choking sobs escape you. Your arms shakily wrap around him, attempting to pull yourself closer to him. It wasn’t so much the loss of your stuff or the home but the mere thought of having to go back now. You weren’t ready yet. You still had a month, you were supposed to have a whole month left. This was happening too quick. Your old apartment was still unavailable to you, meaning you didn’t have a place to stay, all you could think of thought was going back to him.

Sam pulls his phone out dialing Tony, “Hey, some things happened. It looks like your getting your wish we’re coming back.”

Bucky POV

After getting off the phone with Sam, Bucky started to pace the floor. He had made the call. He made the right choice. He just had to wait now. Of course, he was either going to die from his friends beating him or something worse.

Soon he was interrupted by a phone call. Mission meeting in 2 hours when the rest of the team came back. A door down the hall opens, Nat staggers out.

“You get the call as well?”

“Yes, all hands on deck I guess.” She is practically whispering it. She won’t meet his eyes.

“Ok, I called Sam. I’m going to make this right I promise.” She snorts at this finally looking at him.

“Good luck.”

“They know.” She stiffens. This was going to be awkward, to say the least. She nods and goes on her way to prep for the mission.

Knowing he couldn’t do anything till Sam arrived he went as well to suit up. FRIDAY informed him of the team arriving. He pulls himself together, heading towards the landing platform. He arrives at the hatch. Tony is the first to exit, heading directly toward Bucky. He braces himself seeing the first coming but knowing he deserves it. He takes the hit, letting his head swing with the punch.

“I ought to do much worse than that, Tin Man.” Tony is fuming but already feeling a little better after the one hit. Bucky sees Steve come towards them. Waving him off he looks back at Tony.

“I deserved that. I know what I did was wrong and I’m going to fix this. I need to I never should have done what I did.”

“You’re darn right about that. Unfortunately, you're going to have to prove that to us before you ever get near her. You understand?” He’s waving his finger in his face. He stops and turns around storming off.

“I will,” he yells after Tony. “Where is Sam? I need his help.”

“He’s not here. Stayed back with (Y/N)” Steve answers. Bucky can tell he’s angry with him, no more frustrated. He doesn’t understand still, how is the best friend could break a girls heart so bad. Steve doesn’t meet his eyes for long want to look elsewhere but still be there for his best friend.

He nods, well maybe he can just call for now. First came the mission though. After a brief debrief they all piled into the quinjet and headed out. It was a hard mission, every time it seemed they were making headway they got pushed back.

By the end, all were covered in bruises scrapes and a few cuts all around. They were grateful to be back at the compound. It was harder than normal considering the tension between the members. Nat had gotten glares and snarky remakes from each. Everyone trying to pretend that they both hadn’t played a part in destroying one of their best friends.

At the end of the day though, they each just wanted things to go back to the way things were. When they were a family.

Going to their separate quarters, Bucky grabbed his phone quickly dialed up Sam. When he answered Bucky quickly starts talking, “I need your help. I want you to help me make things right with her. I just don’t know what I need to do? Please? Please help me.”

“Woah slow down there. I can help but did you think about what I said?”

“Yes.”

“Good, now you're going to call me every day, for now, tells me about how your feeling. I’m guessing Tony wanted you to prove yourself to them and I agree but this is a good start. I want to know what is going on in that head of yours. I mean everything any doubts, fears, or wild ideas that pop up.”

Bucky is nodding into the phone. He wants to be certain. He wants to bring his family back together, but most importantly he wants you to come back.

“Is that a Yes?”

“Yes, yes I understand.” He was desperate to make them all understand. He needs to show them all how serious he was. This caused him to almost shout his answer.

“Good now, (Y/N) usually is at work from 9-4 so call me anytime between then and I can guarantee that I’ll pick up. After that, I will be with her so I may not answer so leave me a message and I’ll call you back when I get a chance.”

“Alright”

“Good, now I have to go she’s back.”

“Ok take good care of her.”

“Always do.” Bucky hangs up. He felt better already. He was headed in the right direction.

Over the next week, he calls, Sam never once failing to pick up, in fact, most days Bucky calls 2 or 3 times a day. About 2 weeks later, there was a change, instead of Bucky calling Sam, Sam called him. Bucky picked up afraid that something had happened to her. She could be hurt by anything.

It turned out they were coming back. Now it was time to put his feelings to the test.

@veronicalei @ohlookfanfiction @theassetseyeliner @bustanut2k17 @luckynumber1213 @owhatshername1 @chipilerendi @caelestiside @anbrax5553 @fandom-writes @boundtomyfate @annie-are-you-okay @megs4real @marvelous-imagining @mizzzpink @coffeeismylife28 @yknott81 @chameerah @stevette60 @genlovesdcb @loveyourselfcreateyourself @winter-in-wakanda @buckyappreciationsociety @sammysgirl1997 @unicornqueen05 @sexyashmike @magpiemischief @steggy4ever @greeneyedgirls4 @melconnor2007 @iamwarrenspeace @justreadingfics @buckyismyaesthetic @gondorgirl01 @winterbuttmunch

AM I ENOUGH

Bucky X Reader

Summary: he was your everything but apparently you weren’t his. Left with nothing but some memories where will life take you?

Warnings: Super angst right from the first sentence, Sam being awesome

A/N: ok I know I shouldn’t be starting something new when I’m working on something but this can to me and I needed to write it out before it left me. I’m tagging some people that have helped me write and make a better story. I hope I have put all your advice to good work. @annadier @marvelous-imagining and @metalarmproblems And the always amazing @veronicalei

“You promised you would stay with me. That nothing on Earth could stop you from breaking that promise. What did I do? I don’t know what I did wrong, not to make you leave me.”

“I know she’s perfect, she’s everything you deserve but I thought, maybe for once, I could be enough for someone, for you. You said I was everything you could ever need. Did you ever want me though? If you only needed me, you could have needed me and just been my friend. Why drag me through this and give me so much, only to say none of it was real?” Your cries have fallen on deaf ears. His back is now turned from you shutting you out once more.

The words were echoing in your head they were the first moments of everything crumbling down around you. You couldn’t stay here anymore. He wanted you gone.

You hastily scribbled out a note it was written on the back of one of your pictures making it hard to write on and puncturing the photo at times. Your hand was shaky and tears blurred your vision. You were determined however to get this out and send it to him.

“I’m sorry. I should have seen the signs earlier, but then again I guess I did. I was just fooling myself into thinking I could hold on to you longer when that’s probably when I already lost you. I’m sorry I kept you from her, I won’t bother you anymore. I hope one day you’ll forgive me for keeping you from her for so long.“

You write Love before scribbling it out and simply put your name.

You slide it under the door and walk away. He wouldn’t get it for a few days as he was gone on a mission. That left you with enough time to make a clean getaway, not that anyone was going to come after you.

You weren’t a part of the team, didn’t work with them, didn’t technically live with them either. You were just dating one of the members. Well dated one of them. In fact, if he hasn’t said anything they may not notice your absence for awhile thinking you were busy or something.

You had come to collect everything that you had left here. The clothes, the nic-nacs you had collected over time, photos, really anything that could remind him of you. He moved on and didn’t need your junk in the way. Carting it all away you drop most of it down the garbage shoot putting an end to that. You walked into the main lounge and collected a couple more things. With a final look around you said goodbye and the door shut it all from your view.

“FRIDAY, I’m leaving now you can revoke my access privileges as per his request.”

“All right, Miss (Y/L). It has been nice knowing you. Have a pleasant day.”

“I’ll try FRIDAY.”

Stepping out of the building you head out not quite knowing where you were going but knowing it was far away from here.

The team had gotten back from a grueling mission, they were all banged up and suffering from an arrangement of injuries but none needed professional medical help. A couple band-aids would do the trick and a hot shower for everything else. They filed out of the quinjet; to their surprise, you weren’t waiting there for them. Usually, you would be fidgeting waiting to see that each one was back and relatively unharmed.

Sam was the first to speak up “Hey man where is (Y/N)?” He asks Bucky. “She knew we were coming back today, yes? You text her?”

Bucky stiffens forgetting that you wouldn’t be here anymore. He shrugs attempting to take the subject off you and more so him.

“Man, I could really use a hug from her right now. You know check over my injuries, berate me for getting injured in the first place.” He jokes with the others. They all chuckle knowing that is exactly what you would do to all of them. Well except Bucky, you would be pampering and nitpicking his every move just to reassure yourself that he was safe.

“Maybe she fell asleep waiting for us. FRIDAY, we’re back, is (Y/N) in the building?” Tony asks you had done that a couple times before because of the lateness of a mission.

“No Sir she is not. She has not been back since two days ago. She collected some of her stuff and hasn’t been back since.”

“Oh, alright I’ll just have to text her since other people seem to have forgotten.” He says shooting Bucky a glare. Bucky can’t meet his eyes knowing the true reason to why you weren’t there.

They shuffle to their separate rooms to shower and change. They all eventually drift back to the kitchen when their stomachs announce their need for food. All but Bucky had come down, Steve the concerned friend he always was went to get him. Knocking on the door he found Bucky standing in his room showered but staring at the bed. It was nicely made the grey comforter pulled up and the pillows tucked under and plumped. The room was perfectly squared away not a thing out if the place it seemed odd but Steve shrugged it off and continued into the room.

He places a hand on Bucky’s shoulder causing him to jump at the touch. “Hey just wanted to let you know that there is dinner in the kitchen everyone is waiting for you. Have you heard anything from (Y/N) yet?” Bucky shakes his head. “Hey what’s up with you you’ve been weird for this whole mission and even now?”

“Its nothing Steve, I have just been dying to sleep in my own bed now.”

He rolls his shoulder pushing Steve’s hand off of him. He heads out leaving Steve behind, Steve takes a deep breath and drops his head. He was only trying to help. A picture on the ground catches his eyes, he stoops down to pick it up. It’s the picture from one of your days on the beach together. Bucky and You had romped along the beach all day playing in the water and building numerous sandcastles only to have the other knock it down. Here though you both had laid down tired from the day, your head was on his chest, his arm wrapped around you both sleeping under an umbrella. It was one of your favorites, flipping it over he reads your words.

His heart breaks, suddenly everything makes sense. Bucky’s attitude, he wouldn’t focus to save his life missing quite a few easy shots during the mission; the room, he looks up none of your personal things could be seen, there was nothing scattered about like you usually have. So that's what happened, he whips around and chases Bucky down. He starts waving the photo as he sees him sitting at the kitchen counter, not fully taking in his surroundings.

“What the heck is this?” Shoving it in his face. Bucky grabs it and looks at the photo before turning it over. He reads the words but doesn’t quite comprehend it all, so he sits and stares trying to make it say something else. He thought he wanted to move on from you that you weren’t enough but now, he wasn’t so sure. He hadn’t cared while you had screamed at him and begged him to explain.

“Answer me Bucky what happened between you and (Y/N)? Why isn’t she coming back?” You could hear a pin drop it was so silent in the room all gaping at Bucky.

“That’s why she is not here?“ Tony half standing now from where he had been sitting on the couch.

“Tell me!” Steve snaps. Taking Bucky by the collar and forcing him to look him in the eye.

“I….I broke up with her.” He whispers, “Right before the mission.” His voice keeps getting smaller.

“Why? Why would you ever want to do that?” Steve pleads. “She was your everything. You couldn’t stop talking about her when she wasn’t with you and when she was you were attached at the hip. She’s your best friend, a kind of friend I can never be.”

“I thought…” He trails off not wanting to phrase the next part wrong . “I thought I wanted something else… someone else.”

“You arrogant son of a… Did you cheat on her?” Tony growls.

“No, I couldn’t do that. Not to her.”

“But you could break up with her out of the blue after she gave you everything!”

“Hey whoa back up, now let’s calm down and talk it out” Sam is standing pulling Tony back by the shoulder trying to meditate before tensions could rise further. “Sit down Tony this isn’t going to help anything.”

Tony sits with a huff. Sam faces Bucky meeting his eyes. “Bucky I’m guessing you’re regretting breaking up with her now. Why?”

“I walked in the room and nothing felt right it wasn’t home, I looked for anything to hold on to buts all gone. She took everything of hers is gone even out here. The book she kept on the side table. The blankets, even the pillows every single one is gone. She disappeared and it like I’m missing a part of myself. I don’t know what to do.“

“And this person you were leaving her for, she doesn’t make you feel this way? Does she make you happy? Maybe you just need to get used to the idea that (Y/N) is gone.”

Protests were heard all around. Sam held up his hands shushing them as he went to explain himself. Bucky was looking even more confused staring now down at his hands like they held the answer.

“All I’m saying is I don’t want you trying to get her back just because you are used to her being there. She was a constant but you drifted away from her for a reason. I want you to decide whether she is everything you could ever want and need now and forever. That she is going to be the only one always. Or you can let her go and you both move on with your lives. You need to know she is not just going to let you back in after what you did to her. You are going to have to fight to get her back. It may take a long while longer than either of you may like but you have left a very broken girl in your wake. I want you to be absolutely certain you love her with all you have.”

Now everyone is staring at Sam. They tend to forget he is a councilor for the VA so everything that he just said made so much sense and very true. Now the question was he willing to fight for you?

To be continued……

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