*insert* YES, SIT ON IT!

*insert* YES, SIT ON IT!

like a chair

member | jeonghan x f reader genre | smut word count | 1.4k synopsis | when jeonghan tells you to sit, you sit. smut warnings | descriptions of female anatomy, face sitting, oral (reader receiving), hair pulling (jh receiving), overstimulation (both receiving), pet names (princess, baby), jeonghan is a dirty little masochist and he cums in his pants notes | jeonghan pussy eater agenda everyone say amen. tagging @duhnova because they'd be mad at me if i didn't

there’s a muffled noise between your legs and you lift your hips up, wincing at the sudden feeling of cold air.

“why’d you move?” jeonghan asks below you, clearly out of breath but pretending not to be. he’s wearing nothing except for his sweatpants, his bare arms wrapped securely around your thighs as he lays against the bed.

you look down at him, unconsciously squeezing your legs around his head when you see the mess around his mouth. his cheeks are a deep shade of pink and his lips are swollen and sticky, glistening with spit and slick. “you were trying to say something?”

“just talking to myself about how good you taste.” he smirks and tugs at your thighs to pull you back down onto his mouth, flicking his tongue upwards through your folds when you try to resist.

you frown and cross your arms, ignoring the tingling in your stomach as you watch his nails dig into your skin, his fingers turning pale at the tightness of his grip. “well, don’t do that. it makes me think i’m suffocating you.”

“princess, i appreciate your concern, but when i say sit on my face, i mean sit. like a chair. don’t think about me.”

“hannie—”

but before you can say anything he yanks you down hard, catching you off guard as you fall against his waiting mouth. you whimper as his lips immediately wrap around your clit, one hand shooting out to grip the headboard to stabilize yourself.

you look down between your legs where you can just barely see the top half of jeonghan’s face, his tangled hair sprawled across the pillow. his eyes are the only part of him that’s visible, hungrily staring straight up at you, as if he’s daring you to sit up again and see what happens.

you throw your head back with a breathy groan. the sloppy sounds coming from beneath you go straight to your core, the knot in your stomach tightening too fast for you to keep up with.

you try your hardest to resist the urge to grind against his mouth, but he knows you too well and knows you’re holding back, which is not what he wants, despite how you worry about him. his hands slide behind your ass and you look down again, finding an almost disappointed look in his eyes as he starts to rock your hips back and forth.

your other hand falls to his hair, weaving your fingers through it and tugging as you give in, dragging your pussy across his tongue with a whine. you can feel him smile against you when you grip his hair tighter, pushing your hips into his eager mouth. 

if there’s one thing jeonghan loves more than anything in the world, it’s when you use him for your pleasure. he usually has to coax you into it at first, not wanting to hurt him, but once your orgasm starts to close in something changes and suddenly you’re more frantic with your movements, more desperate to get off, the only thought occupying your mind is how good the feeling of his mouth, or his fingers or his cock or whatever’s inside you, is.

he lets your hand in his hair guide him, pushing and pulling his head around exactly where you want him. he can tell you’ve stopped thinking, focused only on the feeling of your walls throbbing around his tongue and his nose pressed against your clit. 

he can feel his cock straining against his pants, aching from not being touched, but the wait is well worth it when he finally gets to feel you cum on his mouth. he groans at the thought and you pull his hair harder, moaning out his name as you grind down on his mouth. his grip on your ass tightens, and he can feel his own spit mixed with your wetness dripping down his chin.

“fuck, hannie, right— right there! please,” you gasp out, your thighs squeezing the sides of his head so hard it makes him dizzy.

if his mouth wasn’t currently occupied he would make you beg him for permission before you cum, but he’s feeling generous tonight, as he usually does when you let him eat you out like this.

he purses his lips around your clit, sucking as hard as he can, and he can feel your legs tense up as you finally break, a flood of wetness seeping onto his tongue. your fingers clench and unclench in his hair, almost in rhythm with the way your cunt clenches above his mouth. 

he never lets up, continuing to drag your hips as you ride his face through your orgasm. you try to lift yourself up a little, flinching away from him, but his grip on you is firm. he holds you down against his mouth as he laps at your pussy, determined to clean up every last drop that spills out of you despite your whines and pleas.

he keeps going even when you call his name, the words stuck in your throat as you struggle to breathe through the overstimulation. you tug on his hair one more time to get his attention, but instead it just pushes him over the edge before he can even see it coming.

he nearly blacks out for a second, eyes squeezed shut as he releases a guttural moan into your pussy. his fingers loosen and you finally manage to break away from him, pushing your hips away from his face and falling to the side as your legs tremble with the aftershocks of your orgasm.

without your cunt smothering his face jeonghan finally gasps for air, his mouth hanging open and his chest heaving with shallow, hurried inhales. the dark stain on his sweatpants continues to grow as he lets out soft groans, his cock jerking as warmth floods his abdomen. 

you roll onto your back and look over at him, still panting as you start to catch your breath. watching the distant look in his eyes makes you grin, and you lean over to kiss a dry spot on his cheek. his hand falls to your shoulder as he pulls you closer to kiss you properly, and you whimper at the wetness on his warm lips.

the kiss doesn’t last very long, though, and he pulls back with a long sigh, still trying to even out his breathing. you rest your head on his chest and look up at him, captivated with how fucked out he looks as you wait for him to return to you.

after a moment he looks down at you, meeting your eyes with a mischievous smile. “see? didn’t suffocate,” he says, almost proudly.

you roll your eyes in response, swiping your thumb across his nose to wipe away some of the wetness, though it doesn’t make much of a difference. he sighs again and relaxes into the bed, but you move your fingers to his neck and he tenses up again, grinning when he sees you’re not quite done for the night.

your hand slides down his bare chest, drifting over his defined abs and pausing at the waistband of his sweats before resting on top of the wet spot, adding just a little bit of pressure. he moans and pushes his hips into your hand, shivering as his own overstimulation begins to set in at your touch.

“baby—mmh, too much,” he whimpers, his smile instantly falling. his hand moves on top of yours but his grip is light, his body telling a different story than his words.

you lean over his face and drag your tongue across his chin, keeping your eyes locked with his as you clean up the mess you’d left behind. “can’t believe you came untouched, just from letting me ride your face,” you whisper with a mischievous smile of your own. “you like it, don’t you? it gets you off, when you make me cum all over your tongue.”

“fuck,” he curses, arching his hips off the bed as he pushes his ruined sweats off onto the floor. “i can go again, just wait, please.”

you press another kiss to his puffy lips, deciding to be generous to him, too. “eat me out until you’re hard again and then i’ll suck you off, okay?”

suddenly with newfound energy he flips you onto your back, grinning as he shimmies down the bed and pries your shaky legs apart. “deal.”

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He is, DEFINITELY, hard to resist 😩

🏹 not your boyfriend, not your girlfriend: soobin x fem!reader | college au!, friends to lovers | warnings: some smut ♡

you ain’t my boyfriend and I ain’t your girlfriend but you don’t want me to see nobody else and I don’t want you to see nobody…

[4.0k words] ☆ [pls do not repost]

He’s not your boyfriend. You’re not his girlfriend. But the thought of someone else touching you angers him. The thought of another female even looking at him throws you into a spiral. 

Yet there’s nothing either of you can do about it. You two aren’t together after all. 

You lean against the wall twirling the red solo cup in your hand, glancing around the room at the sea of drunk college kids. Watching as they play party games and sing so off-key to the music blasting out of the speakers. 

You take a sip from your drink, debating whether or not to leave right after this cup was empty. Parties weren’t really your thing after all. You only come with your best friend, who ended up ditching you the moment you walked in the door. 

You finished the drink, turning to leave when someone bumps into you. 

“There you were babe!” he wraps his arm around your shoulders, planting a kiss on your forehead, “been looking everywhere for you.” 

You sign, knowing now that you’re trapped. 

“Come on, babe don’t look so disappointed to see me.” 

“I was fixing to leave, Soobin.” you scoffed, finally breaking free from his arms. 

His dimple smile melts your heart, sending tingles down your spine, “I noticed you seemed like you wanted to leave,” he said looking down at your empty cup, “but the guy standing by the window was giving you a look and decided to step in to protect you.” 

You raised your brow at him, “Protect me? Soobin?”

He nodded, “Of course. Mans looks like a whole dick and a half.” 

You chuckle, dropping your head into your palm, “Probably because he HAS a dick, Choi Soobin.” 

Soobin tucks his bottom lip between his teeth. He wants to shout at you his feelings so you could finally understand why he’s so protective over you. 

Soobin grabs your empty cup and sets it against the counter then places his hands on your shoulders, softly pressing you against the wall. 

You look up at him, seeing the want in his eyes. Your whole body heats up. 

“Just spend some extra time with me, ya? Before you decide to head out?” He whispered. 

How quickly you nodded your head in agreement should scare you, you didn’t want him to know how badly you wanted him. He’s not your boyfriend, after all. 

Soobin smirks, sliding his hands down to your hands. Pulling you away from the wall and leading you up the stairs in this dance you’ve both done many times before. 

It started out like this. 

Two lonely people at a party were ditched by their friends and had nothing else better to do than each other. 

You knew who he was. He sat two rows behind you in class. He was quiet, and only spoke to his friends he had in class. Was five minutes early every day and for the most part kept to himself unless spoken to by the professor or another classmate. 

It surprised you when he first walked into the party. Barely even recognized him. He went from this innocent boy who hid his face with his hair, wearing sweatpants and a hoodie to class, into this sexy man in tight light blue skinny jeans with holes in them, Nike air forces, and a long sleeve black shirt with his hair parted. 

If you didn’t know him from before, you would assume he was one of the popular party boys all the girls drool over. 

And damn, he was catching looks from the girls at the party. 

Your best friend looped her arm with yours, “Earth to Y/N!! Did you hear me?”

You snapped your eyes away from Choi Soobin, giving your best friend your full attention, “I’m sorry I was daydreaming, what did you say?” 

She side-eyes the area you were just staring at, “were you looking at Soobin?” 

You blink at her, “You know him? And calling him by his first name?” 

She smiles brightly, “Yep! we have chem lab together and I’m SOOOO into one of his friends.”

You nodded at her, “I should’ve known,” You looked back over in Soobin’s direction, noticing his dog pack behind him, “which one are you here for?” you asked her. 

She giggles and squeezes your arm tighter, “Taehyun! We met at the campus coffee shop and totally hit it off right away!” 

You nodded again, “I’m sure you did.” 

“We did! And he told me about this party tonight.” 

“Is that why you canceled our stay indoors and watch horror movies best friend date and dragged me to this party instead? To hook up with Kang Taehyun?” you raised a brow at her. 

“When you put it that way you make me seem like a bad guy,” she pouted at you, “plus he told me his friends would be coming with him, sooooo I figured you could ya know.” she nudged your arm. 

You scoff at her, “Nope! absolutely not. I’m going home!” 

“Y/N! Please, you need to get out there!”

Before you could protest, Soobin and his four friends were right beside you guys. 

“Wow you made it Hanna,” Taehyun says basically stealing my best friend from me, “who’s this?” he asked giving me a small smile. 

“I’m Y/N, nice to meet you.” 

Taehyung nodded, “Nice to put a face to the name. Hanna talks about you all the time.” 

You glance over at her. She gives you her normal apologetic smile. 

“Anyways how rude, these are my best friends, Choi Yeonjun, Huening kai, Choi Beomgyu and that’s—“

“Choi Soobin.” you said, giving all five of them a small smile. 

The boys all looked at Soobin, waiting for an explanation.

“W-we have a class together.” Soobin says, shoving his hands into his pockets. 

After that awkward conversation, you slowly walked away to grab yourself a drink, because god knows you need it now. 

“Grab me a drink too please!” Hanna calls after you.

When you returned to the same spot the six of them were, only Soobin remained. 

You shook your head, “where did they go?” 

He shrugged his shoulders, “Your guess is as good as mine.” He folded his arms against his chest and leaned against the wall. 

You stood beside him, “well you can have this I guess.” you said, handing him the cup. 

“I didn’t picture you as a partygoer, Y/N.” Soobin softly smiles while taking a sip of the drink. 

“You neither, you completely look different than you do in class.” 

He chuckles, “Yeah I don’t really try for college. No need to impress anyone. Go in, get your education, get out, and go back home.” 

“Then why are you here tonight?” you asked. 

He glances at you, “Everyone else was coming, and Yeonjun Hyung basically pulled me by my ear out of the dorm.” 

You nodded with a sigh, “Hanna basically did the same to me.” 

“Guess we’re in this together then.” Soobin held out his cup towards you in a way of cheers. 

You mimicked the action, then you both chugged down the drinks. 

You don’t remember much of the conversations after that. Just that you both continued to drink and drink. 

“Okay okay, truth time.” Soobin drunkenly giggles. 

“What is this? Truth or dare? Are we five?” you giggle back at him. 

“Never too old for it,” he defends, “anyways truth.”

“Okay, I’m listening.” You smile, taking another sip of your drink.

Soobin tucks his lip between his teeth, glancing across the room, “Have you met Yeonjun hyung before?” 

Your smile drops, “Choi Yeonjun? I mean we have a couple of other classes together and I pass him in the halls sometimes,” you look in the same direction as Soobin, noticing Yeonjun is looking back, “why? Is something wrong?” 

Soobin sighs and looks back at you, “I am very observant and noticed the moment we walked in and he looked at you that…well.” 

You look into Soobin’s eyes, “are you implying he’s interested in me?” 

Soobin shrugged, “he could be. Either that or like I asked if the two of you knew each other beforehand. But he’s been looking at you the entire night.”

You laughed, “Soobin, you’re acting jealous right now.” 

He rolls his eyes, “I barely know you, how could I be jealous?” he shakes his head chuckling, “I just know hyung, and wanted to just give ya a heads up is all.” 

You tilted your head, “That’s really sweet, but you’re not my boyfriend so you don’t need to look after me like that.” 

Soobin rolled his eyes again, “noted.” 

“How about you then? Hmm?” 

He takes a sip, “What about me?” 

“With how you walked in here you must have girls begging for your attention. Do you dress like this outside of school too?” 

He nodded, “I do. That doesn’t mean girls are making passes at me.” 

You glanced around the room and noticed at least two girls blushing over him. 

“There are two girls right over there who would love your attention right now.” 

Soobin looks in the direction you pointed at, then shook his head, then looked back at you, “Not interested.”

“What? Are you nervous or something?” you teased him.

He gives you a confused look, “what would I have to be nervous about?”

“I dunno, maybe you’ve never hooked up with a girl at a party before.” you continued to tease him. 

Soobin raised his brow at you, “You’re making these assumptions as if you know me personally.” 

“Well truth time then, have you ever hooked up with someone before?” 

Soobin’s face turned a shade of pink, looking away from you he answered, “I have.” 

You slapped your hands on your cheeks, “Omg really!? the shy Choi Soobin from class actually pulled girls!?”

He glances at you, “Of course I have. you act like sex is such an uncommon thing for shy people like me.” He finished his cup and tossed it onto the counter, then made direct eye contact with you, “do you not believe me?” 

You shook your head, “Nope.” 

Soobin smirked, chewing on his bottom lips.

You could see the gears in his head turning, “what are you thinking about?” 

“I could prove it to you.” 

You weren’t expecting his response. Your whole body started to tingle, “prove it to me?” you nervously giggled, looking away from him. 

You weren’t expecting the next turn of events to happen either, Soobin had you against the wall, one hand above your head, the other was on your hip, and his body was pressed against yours. 

“I didn’t stutter.” he whispered, connecting his forehead against yours. 

You stared up at him, “where did this confidence come from?” you whispered back. 

“Always been here, I just don’t show it.” 

You could feel the heat radiating from his body. Your knees started to feel weak and your hands trembled at your sides. 

Soobin pressed himself even closer to you, his arm completely wrapping around behind your back, “I’ve honestly been wanting to hook up with you since the moment I met you in class.” 

You bit your lip, his confession turned you on more than you wanted to attempt to yourself. It was so hot seeing this once-shy boy you normally see in class act this sexy. Was it the alcohol? or is he really this confident? Either way, it was killing you.  

“Are you going to kiss me or continue to just look at me?” you asked, testing your own confidence. 

His lips connected with yours, the taste of cherry and alcohol filled your senses from his chapstick and the drink he just finished. You had a better smell of his cologne and oh man it was sending you into a frenzy. 

You were melting against his touch with the way his hands were on your body. His tongue sent chills down your spine every time it brushed against your own. 

You didn’t care that you two were making out in the middle of the kitchen at some random party with many people around. 

All you cared about was him. 

He led you up the stairs and into an empty room, quickly closing and locking the door behind him. 

His hands and lips were back on you in an instant as if those short couple minutes were too long. 

He pulled his shirt over his head, his body leaving you even more breathless. 

You tossed your tank top over your head and somewhere in the room. 

His body was back against yours, the skin-to-skin contact made your head spin. 

Soobin played with the button of your jeans, silently asking for permission. 

You let him, your hands going to the button of his jeans immediately after. 

It’s been so long since you’ve been naked in front of someone and you figured the first time having sex again would make you nervous and hide like a child, but it was different with Soobin. He brought out this confidence in you that you never knew you had. The rest of your clothes came off quickly, and the same did his. 

You could have sworn Soobin’s body was crafted by the gods. He’s so beautiful. 

His hands cupped your breasts, his thumbs slowly gliding over your nipples. You moaned against his mouth. 

He sat down on the edge of the bed, pulling you to straddle him. 

Soobin looked you up and down, “You’re so beautiful, every inch of you.” his hands squeezed your hips. 

Your fingers played in his hair, “is this something you want?” you asked. 

Soobin tucks his lip between his teeth, slowly nodding, positioning his member for you, “I will literally lose it if you don’t slide down onto me right now.” he whispered. 

Sex with Soobin was pure bliss. You felt that bliss with every inch of your body as you rode him. His lips and hands never left your body and your hands never left his hair until you both finished. 

You two returned to the party like nothing ever happened. The two girls who were drooling over Soobin earlier seemed to only be even more interested in him now that sex was literally written all over his face. 

You scoff, “Those two still want you.” 

Soobin wrapped his arm around your waist, “Hmm jealous are we?” 

You chuckled, “Of course not. You’re not my boyfriend.”

Soobin laughed with you, “And you’re not my girlfriend.” 

It’s been almost a year since then. 

You and Soobin have had sex multiple times since then, and he still made you lose your breath every single time. 

The two of you grew to even become friends in a way. Or even best friends some would say. The two of you started hanging out outside of the classroom and at parties. He got to know you so well and the same with you towards him. He became someone you didn’t want to have a life without. 

But the feelings you started to build up for him over that year were growing too strong for you to contain. 

Little did you know the feeling was mutual for Soobin. 

He hated it when he knew you were going to parties or anywhere alone. He hated the thought of another man putting his hands on you. The thought of another man kissing you, touching you, making you feel the way only he wants you to feel. And the thought of you dating another man…

Soobin understood how your relationship was: two classmates that had sex and turned into friends who have sex. That’s all it was supposed to be until the night he realized he had feelings and realized he hated any man that looked in your direction. 

You also secretly felt that way about any woman who looked at Soobin. 

The two of you had this secret unspoken thing that you both didn’t want the other to see anyone else. You both just didn’t know it. 

Soobin was running late and was never late. It wasn’t him to be late. 

Tonight’s party was being held on campus for the school winning some kinda sports event. Soobin walked into the courtyard, immediately being met by Huening Kai and Beomgyu. 

“you’re late!” Kai said looking at his watch. 

“Yeah yeah I know,” Soobin sighed, “where are Taehyun and Yeonjun?” 

“Taehyun is with Hanna…” Beomgyu shrugged. 

“Should have known, and Yeonjun?” Soobin asked. 

Kai and Beomgyu went quiet. 

Soobin looked between the both of them, confusion showing on his face. 

“Where is Yeonjun?” Soobin asked again. 

“He’s well…he’s with someone.” Kai said, trying to smile. 

“Okay…?” Soobin raised a brow.

“He’s with—“ Beomgyu started, but Kai quickly covered his mouth. 

“He’s not with anyone! hahaha.” Kai nervously laughed. 

Soobin continued to look between his juniors, still confused about what was even going on between the two of them. 

Until it clicked in his head. 

Soobin quickly moved past them, “where is he?” 

“Soobin Hyung, wait!” They called out for him. 

Soobin knew Yeonjun secretly had a thing for you, it was written all over his face from the beginning. 

Soobin made his way inside the campus and asked people left and right if they’d seen both of you, none knew until someone pointed him in the direction of the gymnasium where they were handing out food, punch, and alcohol. 

He found the both of you standing on the far side of the gym. Yeonjun was standing too close to you for his liking. 

Soobin quickly walked up, wrapping his arm around Yeonjun, “There you guys are! I was looking for you!” 

“You’re late!” You said checking the time on your phone, “Yeonjun and I almost started drinking without you. Where’s everyone else?” 

Soobin shrugged his shoulders, “Huening Kai and Beomgyu were in the courtyard. Apparently Taehyun—“

“Is with Hanna, of course.” you sigh, “I’m happy for them so I’ll let it slide.” You started to walk away, “I’m going to the courtyard and I’ll call Hanna to meet us there.” 

Soobin nodded, “grab me a drink on the way out okay?” he asked you.  

You gave him a thumbs up, walking away. You could tell something was bothering Soobin but didn’t want to press the conversation in front of Yeonjun. 

Once you were out of the gym, Soobin let go of Yeonjun facing him. 

“What is that look for?” Yeonjun asked. 

“It’s nothing. Ready to meet with the others?” Soobin asked, starting to walk away. 

“Hey, is Y/N talking to anyone by chance?” Yeonjun asked. 

Soobin stops walking, “Uhh not that I know of…why?” 

“Because I’m interested in her. She’s your best friend besides me of course, and I think she’s funny and I want to get to know her a little more than I already do.” 

Soobin looked at his hyung, trying everything in him to not shout at him to leave you alone. But he knows he can’t. He’s not your boyfriend. 

“Soobin say something,” Yeonjun said, crossing his arms over his chest. 

“I uhh…I can ask if she’s talking to someone.” 

“That’s now why I meant.” Yeonjun tried to make eye contact with Soobin, wanting him to tell the truth. 

“What do you mean then?” 

Yeonjun sighs, “What I’m trying to say is, if you’re not going to make a pass at her, I’m going to.” 

Soobin’s heart dropped, and his body filled up with heat, it took everything in him to say what he did next, “I’m not her boyfriend, do whatever you want.” 

Yeonjun rolled his eyes, “I can’t man!” Soobin looked at his hyung confused, “You’re having sex with her and it’s so obvious that the two of you are pining for each other and just won’t say anything. I’m tired of hearing the “She’s not my girlfriend, I’m not her boyfriend” bullshit. I would feel terrible if I went after Y/N, knowing you damn well want her for yourself.” 

Soobin looked away, “We made it clear to each other the first time we hooked up that we weren’t together, it was all about the sex and that’s it.”

“Yeah, and it’s been a year since then man,” Yeonjun walked closer to Soobin, putting his hands on his friends’ shoulders, “I can see it in the way you look at her dude, it’s not just about the sex anymore and with the way you dart across the room when another man looks at her? or how when she notices any other girl looks at you? have you not noticed how jealous she gets? how will she stand closer to you?” 

Soobin shook his head, “She doesn’t want me in that way.” 

Yeonjun nodded, “I still think you need to tell her, and I’m giving you until tomorrow night to say something, or else I’ll try and make a pass to her.” 

Yeonjun patted his back and then finally walked away. 

Soobin knew he was right, it’s time to say something. 

You stood outside their dorm building, the summer breeze felt warm against your skin. 

You checked the time on your phone, Soobin said to meet him here before returning back to the party but he’s once again running late. This isn’t like him. 

You finally catch Soobin walking over towards you but with another girl hooked up on his arm. 

Jealousy filled you. You looked away, shoving your hands into your jeans pockets, trying to shove down the feeling. “he’s not your boyfriend…Y/N…” You repeated the words in your head over and over again. You don’t have a right to be jealous. You’re not his girlfriend. 

“Soobinnie!” oh god you wanted to throw up, “my dorm is across the street there!” 

You glanced over at them, this girl was drunk and clearly trying to get Soobin in her bed. 

Soobin looked at you, and you quickly looked away. 

“Can you make it back there on your own?” He asked. 

You rolled your eyes. You knew how good Soobin was in bed, it shouldn’t surprise you he probably has been in other beds besides yours. 

“I may need some help…” you wanted to barf. 

“Hey,” you shouted, “you clearly aren’t drunk enough to try and get him in your room so you can obviously walk up there alone, okay?” 

Soobin’s eyes widen, he’s never seen you act like that before. 

“Is that your girlfriend or something?” the girl asked, “I knew you were too gorgeous to be single.” 

“He’s single all right,” you mumbled to yourself. 

Soobin sighed, “I can’t go any further with you, I apologize.” 

The girl scoffs but eventually walks away. 

“What was with that attitude?” Soobin asked, giving you a sassy look. 

“She clearly was trying way too hard.” you softly snap, “it was way too obvious.” 

“Are you jealous?” Soobin teased, standing in front of you. 

You rolled your eyes, “no reason to be jealous, you’re not my—“

“Boyfriend, I know,” he said. You looked up at him and noticed the hurt in your eyes, “but maybe I should be.” 

“Wait, what?” you asked. 

Soobin looked away, “I want to be your boyfriend, Y/N. It’s not just about the sex anymore, I want all of you. My heart can’t take it anymore. If I see one more man try to make a pass at you, I’m going to lose it.” 

“Soobin…” you softly said his name. 

“God, I love the way you say my name…but I already know your response to this, that our relationship is strictly sex. We made that agreement a year ago and—“

“Soobin shut up and kiss me right now.” 

He looks deeply into your eyes and all you can see is the spark that lights up his entire being. 

His hands are on the sides of your face in an instant and his lips connected to yours. 

You’ve kissed him millions of times, but never like this. The last kisses have always been filled with lust, want, desire, temptation, and need. But this one was filled with…well, love. 

It was filled with so much love. 

“I’m in love with you, Soobin.” you whispered in between kisses, “and if one more damn woman looks at you with the desire that I have for you, I’ll commit murder.” 

He giggles against your lips, “You’re so cute when you’re jealous.” 

“As your girlfriend, I have a right to be.” 

“And as your boyfriend, I’ll allow you to be.”

You smiled against his lips, “I love you.” 

“I’ve loved you since the moment you let me lead you up those stairs, my heart has been yours since the beginning.”

That Cheshire grin definitely got to the MC 😩💖

• part one

The Best Friends Code Part One - Hongjoong x Reader (NSFW)

This is an Ateez fic.

PART TWO HERE.

Summary: Hongjoong swears up and down that if you don’t touch each other, it won’t ruin the friendship…and what is the harm in blowing off some steam?

Genres and warnings: smut. porn without any real plot. best friends to lovers. dirty talk. use of sex toys. cum eating. 

Word count: 3,383.

This fic is not meant to represent Hongjoong in any way, shape or form.

               “This is boring. You know this is boring, right?”

               You look up from your laptop to where Hongjoong is sprawled out across the chair in your bedroom. His own laptop balances precariously on his knee, his phone clutched in one hand. He is looking at you through thin gold framed glasses, wearing an oversized white sweater and sweatpants. A bored expression has settled across his features and with his free hand, he runs his fingers through his blonde hair.

               “Yes, Hongjoong,” You reply in a firm tone, “I know it is boring. But I told you right off the bat when you wanted to hang out today that I had a big work project to finish.”

               He exhales, rolling his head back while groaning in an over-the-top way that he loves to do. Everything with Hongjoong is either the end of the world or the best thing in the universe and he reacts accordingly. You are sitting cross legged on your bed, typing away at your laptop, trying to ignore how bored he is. You can’t bring yourself to order him home either because you enjoy his company, even if he is acting like a kid.

Keep reading

a happy coincidence 💬😉

wrong number...

group: stray kids !

pairing: neighbor!han jisung x f!reader

genre: fluff, suggestive + allusions to sex (MDNI)

warnings + additional info: reader is referred to as y/n, jisung is referred to as hannie, ji, sungie, highly suggestive scene, jisung is a barista. MDNI

authors note: this scenario is such a jisung thing to do i cant even lie. again, minors please do not interact with this post as it is highly suggestive. this is also not proofread. english is not my first language, so please excuse any grammatical or spelling errors. happy reading :)

wc: 3102

“oh you’re so dead”

you and jisung have been playing a new game that came out two days ago. you’re in a 1v1 right now, but ji keeps playing sneaky.

“stop hiding, i wanna actually fight you”

he slowly crouches towards your avatar, quickly pulling out his sword and attacking you at the speed of light. you couldn’t even land a single hit on him because it was knocking you so far back. you decided to accept your fate, respawning seconds later.

“next time we’re fighting face to face. it’s unfair if you sneak up on me”, you say with a fake pout.

jisung tries to ignore what that adorable pout of yours does to him, but it just looks too adorable to think about anything else. “ughh fineee”, he whines.

you two make your way to the kitchen, preparing the ramen you had just bought the day before. you made sure to buy the regular version for jisung though, he’s pretty bad with spicy food.

once you finish making it, you hand it to jisung and sit down on the couch to watch a new kdrama. it wasn’t uncommon to do this with jisung. it’s become a weekly routine, and it’s just what you need after a long week at work. 

friends always hang out like this, right?

you walk into the coffee shop right after work. you’re so glad it’s right next to your home. in your personal opinion, no coffee shop will ever compare to this one. maybe it’s because of the coffee, maybe it’s because of the incredibly hot barista.

“your usual?”, jisung asks you as you walk in. “obviously”, you roll your eyes. you grab your drink once it’s done and pull out your laptop, catching up on some more work. 

jisung loves when you come to the shop, it’s his favorite time of his shifts. he admires how hardworking you are, coming into a coffee shop to work right after you finished your shift. 

he finds it adorable how your eyebrows pinch together while you’re working. he loves the color of your rosy lips and-

“jisung!”, he was shaken out of his thoughts by an annoyed jeongin. he jerks his head towards jeongin now, a little confused as to what happened.

“what?”, ji asks. “just tell her you like her at this point man”, jeongin complains.

“what do you mean?”

“you like her don’t you? you’re always staring at her when she’s here”

“no she’s just my friend! absolutely not. heh… no. maybe…”

jeongin is unamused. “you totally like her, you’re just in denial dumbass”

jisung rolls his eyes and gets back to work. maybe he does like you, he’s not sure yet. it’s not okay to like your best friend, he knows that, but the more he thinks about it, the more he thinks he truly does like you.

it’s just a stupid crush. he’ll get over it eventually.

on nights like these, you’re so lucky to have jisung as your next door neighbor. at this rate, you’re practically getting white girl wasted at every party. jisung’s always brought you home after these functions. 

maybe that’s why you like him so much. he’s so caring and kind towards everyone, not to mention he’s gorgeous and- wait. what are you even talking about? you don’t like him, you can’t. he’s your best friend, that’s all he’ll ever be.

that’s all you tell yourself as jisung drives you home. he always stays sober at parties, making sure he can drive you home after a hectic night. 

you get out of the car once you arrive home, stumbling all over the place. you’re glad jisung’s always there to hold you. 

he walks you into your home, making sure you’re safe before leaving.

“no! stay.”, you yell a little louder than you wanted to.

he chuckles at your eagerness. “just let me get changed, we can watch a movie yeah?”

you smile at him and let him get ready, stumbling your way to your room. you begin to wriggle out of your clothes, the material already riding up your thighs. 

you try to pull it up, but your arms are facing upwards in the air. you try to loosen it and wiggle around a little, but it won’t budge. 

shit. you’re stuck.

what’s even worse it that the sequins start scratching your face, and you are certain most have cut you. you can feel them digging into your skin, crying out in pain.

not too long after, jisung makes his way into your house. he calls out for you, “y/n? you ready yet?”

“ji! i need help”, you yell back.

he quickly makes it to your room and opens the door, “what’s wro- OH GOSH”. he quickly covers his eyes. 

“i’m stuck in my dress, i can’t get it off”, you whine, “i think the sequins are cutting me, please help”

he makes his way over to you, closing his eyes and pulling the dress off you. he didn’t want to freak you out, so he turned around and sat on your bed while he waited for you. 

you finish getting ready for the movie, wearing a simple t-shirt and some shorts. “i’m ready now”

he turned around, noticing your cuts instantly. he quickly runs to the bathroom and grabs a couple of bandaids. cleaning your arms up with a couple of alcohol wipes, he patches them up. 

“thank you sungieeee”, you beam at him, and he couldn’t help but smile back. he didn’t want to admit what that nickname just did to him.

you both got up to go and watch a couple episodes of that one kdrama, bringing a bunch of snacks with you. late night binging was the best with jisung, he always knew how to entertain you for hours.

it was getting later into the night, and you could feel sleep knocking at your door. you really wanted to finish the episode, but you couldn’t keep yourself up long enough. 

jisung smiles at your sleeping figure, carefully taking the snacks from your hands and placing them on the table. 

he gets up to leave, but you stop him. youre subconsciously clinging onto his arm, preventing him from leaving. he doesn’t want to wake you, so he just lets sleep take over his body too. 

he couldn’t get over how domestic it seemed, maybe he did like you…

jisung woke up that day not only to you cuddling him, but to you entirely straddling him. he couldn’t get up, so he decided to wait till you woke up. your face was comfortably buried in his neck, and he hoped you couldn’t hear the erratic beating of his heart.

you slowly awake from your slumber to see jisung fast asleep. you examined his features, silently laughing to yourself at the way his cheeks puffed up with every breath. just then did you realize what you were doing.

embarrassed, you tried to get off jisung as quietly as possible, making sure not to wake him. after all, you didn’t want any awkward moments. you were hesitant to leave, his body was emitting some kind of warmth you had. never felt before, but you carefully got off and sat next to him.

jisung tried his best to keep the act up, he didn’t want you to be embarrassed, so he continued to “sleep” for a little while after you got up. 

while waiting for him, you start making breakfast. you quickly dump some rice in the pan and crack two eggs, when you hear footsteps behind you.

“good morning sleepyhead”, you teased. “morning…”

you were almost frozen in shock. you loved his voice the way it was, calming and soft, but something about his morning voice made your heart flutter.

you finish preparing breakfast and eat together. both of you play a couple matches of that new game and jisung leaves shortly after. you start to think back to this morning again, you’re glad he was still asleep. 

or so you thought.

“jeongin please what do i do?!” 

jisung was pacing his room. he’s never felt this way about someone before, and it seems that his feelings are only getting stronger.

“just tell her oh my gosh, it’s obvious she likes you back”

no. that can’t be. you’re just friends, right? you’ve never showed any different type of affection towards him. you couldn’t possibly like him, not the way he liked you.

“no jeongin, she doesn’t like me. not at all. not like that…”

jeongin frowned at him. it was difficult seeing his best friend like this, but it was also kind of funny watching his friend fall desperately in love.

“you both have heart eyes when you look at eachother, it makes me sick”

jisung stops in his tracks. “heart eyes…?”. his mind is too hazy to think right now. what if you truly don’t like him. should he even confess to you? would it be worth possibly ruining your friendship for?

“dude, you have to tell her. i know how you feel ji, you just need to tell her that. i’m sure she’ll understand, i can tell she really likes you.”

“well you don’t even know her- she’s different with me”, he pouts. 

“well i see the way she looks at you, and the smile on her face when she’s with you. her smile practically reaches her eyes when you hand her order to her. she doesn’t do that with me, ji”

jisung’s mind starts to run faster. ‘maybe she does like me’, ‘maybe shes just being friendly’, ‘she can’t possibly love someone like me’

“jeongin…”, he trails off.

jeongin sits jisung down and puts a hand on his shoulder. “hey, talk to me… what’s up?”

“jeongin i think im in love with her”

jeongin’s eyes widen. “you’re in love…?”

“i think so, i really do. i’m sorry im ranting about this because it’s super sappy but i genuinely think i love her. i love every single thing about her jeongin… she even has a special nickname for me!”

jeongin laughs at his comment. “awww how cute”, he teased. “shut up.”

jisung didn’t know how to confess. he really wanted to but he didn’t want to ruin those special saturdays he had with you. things would just be awkward. 

friends or lovers… he just wants you with him.

you’re spending yet another day after work in the coffee shop, trying your best to get things done but you’re too distracted. jisung’s off his shift but he’s still sat next to you with a book in his hands, waiting till you finish your work.

he sees jeongin playfully raising his eyebrows and responds to his teasing with a stern look. jeongin just laughs it off and continues working.

you can’t seem to focus on work, it’s getting too boring. instead, you’re busy staring at jisung’s face. the way his lips form a little pout when he’s focused on reading, his nose scrunching a little and eyes squinting as he tries to read the small text. 

it’s been difficult to admit it to yourself, but you’re starting to realize you feel different towards jisung. recently, you’ve been seeing him as something more than just a friend. you think you might really love him.

you know it’s not right, but it’s not like you can control your feelings like that. he’s so attentive with you, so caring and understanding, you’d be a fool to not love someone like him. you wondered if he felt the same way. probably not, you decided you wouldn’t feed your delusions with the thought.

you smile at him, examining his gorgeous features. jeongin’s looking at you, smiling to himself, but you don’t seem to notice.

you don’t think you could ever get bored of jisung.

you’re in bed, and you can’t seem to fall asleep. it’s almost four in the morning, but your mind is running. 

does jisung even love you back? there’s no way he wants someone like you right? you’re not even that special. you don’t even look or act anything like his type, you’re certain he just thinks of you as a friend.

your thoughts get worse, and you seem to be overthinking every single thing. you’re almost about to cry when you hear your phone blowing up. 

you check your phone ‘hannie <3’, it reads. what would jisung be texting you for at four in the morning?

hannie <3: jeongin i love y/n

hannie <3: like i actually do

hannie <3: im not even questioning it anymore, i actually love her

hannie <3: how can i even bring this up to her

hannie <3: fuck what do i do

hannie <3: wake up pls i need help

holy shit. jisung loves you back? and jeongin knew about it? you feel betrayed that jeongin didn’t hint at it, but you’re ecstatic.

jisung. loves. you. back.

it’s not all in your head. you’re not delusional. he loves you. and you love him.

y/n: well why don’t you just tell her?

hannie <3: oh thank god you’re up

hannie <3: how do i even tell her? i don’t know what to say

y/n: well, first off all, list some things off that you love about her

you’ll admit it’s really evil what you’re doing right now, but you can’t help it. this is your chance to get him back after the countless pranks he’s pulled on you. 

hannie <3: okay well i really like her eyes

hannie <3: and her lips look super super soft and so pretty

hannie <3: sorry that sounds really weird

hannie <3: and i really love her hands

hannie <3: they’re super warm

hannie <3: and holy shit her fucking voice

hannie <3: it’s so hot you don’t even understand 

hot? you didn’t really think anything about you was hot in any way. you took jisung’s word for it anyways.

y/n: then just tell her how you feel man, it shouldn’t be that hard

you add more attitude in your texts to make it seem believable. you’re surprised jisung hasn’t noticed that he’s texting the wrong person yet. you decide to finally drop the act.

y/n: just text her, tell her how you feel. it’s less heartbreaking that way if you get rejected because you don’t have to face her.

hannie <3: omg you’re so right, lemme text her rq

a moment of silence…

that moment turns into almost three minutes now

jisung’s panicking. his heart is beating a hundred times per second and he doesn’t know what to do. what if he creeped you out? what if you thought it was funny? what if you treated it like a joke? maybe that would be better… maybe he could just play it off. 

you quickly get out of bed. you feel terrible for doing that to jisung, but you still wanted him to have some closure. you don’t bother to change, you just brush your hair a bit and make your way to his door.

knocking on his door, you wait there for a couple seconds before you hear footsteps.

jisung checks through the peephole, his heart dropping to his stomach. he has to face you now, it’s inevitable. he’s preparing himself for rejection.

he slowly opens the door. “hey…”. he’s looking down, face red with embarrassment. he can’t seem to look at you.

“sungie…”

he jerks his head up at the usage of his favorite nickname. “hm?”

“can i come in?”

he opens the door a little more to let you inside. then closes it behind you. he turns around slowly, scared for the words you’re about to say.

instead, you don’t say anything. you pin him against the door, stealing his lips in an electrifying kiss. you weren’t thinking, but you let your emotions take over.

his muscles tensed under your touch, not yet used to this different sensation. he kisses you back with just as much desire, tongues clashing. butterflies erupt in your stomach, you were stupid to not confess before.

you slowly begin to pull away from him, foreheads still touching. you’re breathing heavily into his lips, and he’s looking at you with pure love in his eyes. 

“did we… really just do that?”, he asks breathlessly.

you nod quickly, thinking of what to say next. “i love you jisung. i love you so much you don’t even understand.” 

his knees wobble under him and he tries to think of a response. “i love you so much more, y/n”, he says, pulling you closer so that your chests are now touching. 

“i don’t think that’s possible, baby”

his eyes widen at the pet name, heart thumping louder in his chest. he hopes you can’t hear it.

he kisses you again, this time flipping you around and leading you to his bedroom. he pecks your lips again, then your cheeks, and starts trailing lower to your jaw. 

you tilt your head back to give jisung easier access, letting out soft gasps as he trails open-mouthed kisses down your neck, pushing you onto his bed. you put your hand on the nape of his neck, pulling him closer to you.

“i love you so much y/n”, he whispered between kisses. he pulled down the collar of your shirt, placing kisses onto the exposed skin. the feeling is addicting, definitely something you could both get used to.

his hands trailed down to your waist, lifting up your shirt slightly. he looked up at you, as if to ask for permission, to which you nodded. 

jisung made love to you the rest of that night, holding your hand the entire time and bursting into adorable smiles and giggles every so often.

you walked into the cafe a day later and began working again like you always do. 

jisung was busy staring at you again, extremely pleased that he could stare at his girlfriend without the fear of getting caught. 

“jisung, holy shit”, a lump forms in jeongin’s throat as he notices something different about you.

jisung turns his head towards him, “what’s up?”

jeongin puts a hand on jisung’s shoulder, figuring how to word his next sentence so his best friend doesn’t start panicking again. “is that a hickey on y/n’s neck…”

jisung’s eyes widen and he starts to go bright red, staring at the the crimson colored splotches and bite marks adorning your neck. 

you get distracted staring at jisung again, who’s whispering something to jeongin. you quickly get back to work not too long after, when your thoughts are suddenly interrupted by a loud yell.

“YOU GUYS DID WHAT?!”

<3

The hopeless romantic in me is crying😭

𝐰𝐞𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐬

agent!yoon jeonghan x agent!gn!reader

0.7k words; when a mission goes wrong, jeonghan tries to distract himself you by talking about a wedding; mentions of blood/a knife wound/poison, cursing

Yoon Jeonghan thought he was going to throw up, cry, or both; and he wasn't even the one dying. 

"This was not what I thought when I wanted to carry you over the threshold," he mused nervously, angling your body so as to not hit the door frame as he carried you into the safe house. There was a team of paramedics already awaiting your arrival, setting up a clean space to work as well as their medical equipment.

In his arms, your limbs were limp and perspiration dribbled down the sides of your face. You had one hand pressed firmly to your side, preventing even more blood from seeping out of your body—your life force slowly drifting. You managed a weak smile up at Jeonghan's carefully calm face. "You wanted—to get married?" You panted, wincing as you added additional pressure to the wound. 

It had been a mission gone wrong, and in an effort to save Jeonghan, you had stepped in the arc of a poisoned blade. Jeonghan had seen you crumple before him, then his vision had gone red with absolute rage. Now? He was panicking. Yoon Jeonghan did not panic. 

"To you? Fuck yes." He couldn't believe he was talking about this while you were dying in his arms. "Hurry! They're dying for fuck's sake!" He barked at the present medical staff. His heartbeat pounded in his ears, and his eyes darted frantically between the staff and your face. 

"Stay with me, dove," he murmured to you when he saw your eyelids drooping. His vision was blurring slightly, tears pooling in his eyes.

You sucked in a breath and tried to focus on his face, and not the vice-like grip the poison had on your heart. "Well, what's it like? Our wedding?"

Jeonghan gulped. His eyes closed briefly, trying to remain calm enough to tell you what he had envisioned for nights while the two of you were undercover together. "You'd look perfect, as always. This extravagant garment, bouquet of callas and just… pearls."

"Pearls?" You hummed, trying to imagine it yourself. 

He smiled down at you, nodding. Anyone could see the love that shined so deeply in his eyes whenever he looked at you. "Mhm. I was thinking of a pearl engagement ring with diamonds around it. What do you think?"

"Huh," you coughed, groaning when you irritated the wound further. You reigned it all in though when seeing worry flash over his features. "Not—bad. What else?"

Jeonghan's eyes flickered back to the medical staff, who motioned for him to set you down on the bed. He did so, carefully, but swiftly. Finally. One of them murmured for him to continue to distract you and keep you awake for them. He could do that. He could definitely do that.

He knelt down beside your head, so you would face away from the doctors working on your injury. There was… so much blood. Jeonghan swallowed. "It'd be a small thing," he told you, "nothing big. Our families, friends from the academy, that sort of thing. We'd have a live orchestra during the ceremony and a band for the reception."

Hand smoothing over the dampened hair against your forehead, Jeonghan hoped you couldn't feel him shaking. "I was thinking a pagoda over a beach cliff. Something stupidly romantic like that."

"That is stupidly romantic," you rasped, agreeing. You bit your lip, feeling something sting sharply at your injury and twist. 

Jeonghan grabbed your hand and let you squeeze as hard as you needed. "I thought so. And we'd have handwritten vows, of course. Cheol would probably be your Man of Honor."

"You're not wrong." You would have joked about calling him your Maid of Honor instead if you had the strength. 

"And when you walked down the aisle—fuck, I'd probably cry." A tear slipped down the slope of his cheek and you wished you could lift yourself up and kiss it away. 

"Hannie?" Your voice was tight from trying to keep the pain in. Whatever the hell those doctors were doing, you could definitely feel it. 

He nodded, wiping his tears away with the back of his hand. "Mhm?"

"Can we get married after this?"

Jeonghan smiled, genuinely this time, and you saw the light return to his eyes if only for a split second. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to your lips. "God yes—I never thought you'd ask."

svt m.list

permanent taglist: @tayunji @im-a-big-mess @staysstrays @y3jiishot @crazywittysassy @seomisaho @stopeatread @enhacolor @yedammi @rnjfy @jaehunny1428 @mythicalamphitrite @ana-is-losing-her-mind @super-btstrash-posts @otchae @luv4vernon

the intricacies of falling in love, and facing the reality of life 🥹💖

title: the times we couldn't say goodbye (the times i loved you most)

pairing: hoshi x gn!reader

wc: 2.2k

notes: fantasy!au, wizard hoshi!au, established relationship, implied friends to lovers, fluff, (pretty significant) angst, suggestive content but nothing explicit, small blood mention, special thanks to @soonsluv and @crimsoncauldron for helping me with edits!

for @neonun-au

i.

It’s in the garden behind the inn where you realize you're really in love with Soonyoung.

He’s eighteen, radiant with the glow of youth and the summer sun, long legs askew underneath the now sprawling wisteria you planted with him as a child. The daylight is emerald through the foliage, and you watch it coalesce in his butterscotch eyes, fall into the gentle slope of his nose.

Your bones feel warm and heavy with happiness. Soonyoung’s head rests in your lap, and he meets your gaze with his usual affection, the overabundant kind that feels like you can hold in your hands with how tangible it is.

“When will you come back?” you ask.

He takes a long pause. It worries you because Soonyoung’s never the type to pause. He goes, he goes and keeps going until he can’t anymore. You're surprised he's stayed so long in one place—here.

"I don't know." He laughs blithely and finds your hand so he can lace his fingers with yours. "I haven't thought that far ahead," he admits.

Then he does that insufferable, maddening thing where he trails little kisses down the span of your wrist, up your forearm, across the back of your hand, his touch featherlight, yet deliberate. You wonder if he's mapping your skin as to not forget you when he leaves.

"All I know is that I need to be there."

You don't need to follow his gaze to know where he's looking—the tall silvery spires past the village, an imposing silhouette of the royal castle of the kingdom you live in.

He doesn't say that people usually don't come back when they leave for the city. You already know that one, too.

And, in turn, you stay quiet. You've learned that words aren't enough to change his mind, which, funnily enough, is why you like him so much.

Instead, you let the swell of love wash over you, a heady, slow rush that spreads over your skin like sun (yet, tender like a bruise) as you let yourself admire him.

You want to love him without expectation, without pretense. But it's hard to separate expectation from love, even for someone like you, whose job it is to watch people come and go.

Because as weighty as Soonyoung's love can be, you know how hard it is to keep. And so you sit, limbs tangled, watching the firebugs pulse with their transient June light, knowing this moment, too, will pass.

You feel the warmth of Soonyoung's laughter settle over you, as certain and familiar as ever. You allow his wandering hands as they press little lights into your skin, and let the heat of his skin play back on yours.

With him, there's never been a forever and always. You chase the now, but in the now, you have him and his lips and his racing heartbeat all to yourself.

And some young, foolish part of you thinks it's a moment you can bottle up and keep. That the closer you hold it to your heart, the more likely he is to stay.

ii.

The first time you learned Soonyoung could use magic, you were thirteen.

You had been demonstrating a perfect cartwheel to him—on the bartop inside the inn, of course. And, in your vain attempt to avoid the smattering of ale steins and assorted weapons in your way, you had careened off the counter and given yourself a nasty scrape on the jagged floorboards.

You had both laughed until you cried, and then when Soonyoung realized you were actually crying, he rushed over with a heartrending urgency.

"S'fine," you mumbled, your adolescent body feeling all too big, too awkward under his gaze.

He offered his hand to help, and being the stubborn kid you were, you denied him. And he whined and fussed until you finally let him kneel down and look at the thin gash, now weeping blood.

You can't even describe what happened next. The patient hover of his usually quick hands over your skin, then an indescribable warmth all over.

And then your knee was healed.

Over the next few years, you watched Soonyoung experiment with his powers.

He'd call your name on his way back from the market, waving his free hand around while balancing a bag of produce in the cradle of his other arm.

"Watch this!" And then a vortex of apples would emerge from the burlap, first a magnificent crimson swirl, and then their eventual pathetic scatter over the grass in front of the inn.

"Almost there," he'd mutter, as you both gather the fruits in your arms, everything and everyone feeling a bit bruised.

Sometimes you'd watch the gap underneath his door intermittently light up as you cleaned the inn for the night. You pictured his cute frown, nose scrunched up as he flexed his palm. Orange, black, orange, black, orange, the weak flicker of the flame birthed from his skin.

You wouldn't say Soonyoung was a good magician. But he certainly was a tenuous one with a considerable stroke of luck.

Before he left, he would show you little tricks.

"I’m paying my rent," he'd harumph, staring intently at the unbaked pie you left on the counter, as if willing it to cook itself. "With my valuable labor."

"You better pay faster." You cast a sidelong glance at the disgruntled mercenary in the corner of the dining room.

"Don't worry about Jihoon. He's my friend." And then another hopelessly determined glare at the innocent, perfectly latticed pie.

Soonyoung's eventual contribution was a quick brûlée over the top after cajoling the poor starving warrior, entertaining him with the surprisingly effective party trick of producing a real bit of fool's gold behind his ear. ("See? We're friends!" he'd tell you.)

"Can these hands at least chop some wood?" you'd tease. They fit so perfectly in your own, something you learned you could, no, would miss.

"Yes," he'd start. "But they can also do this!" And then their warm descent on your sides, tickling you until you collapsed right into him, letting him drink up the laughter right from your lips.

When you first met Soonyoung, he was a small, impish little thing who had turned up at the front door of the inn—on an adventure, he said.

He stayed ever since, learning to run the inn with you.

But you'd see the glow of his eyes as yet another traveler regaled him with tales of an expedition in kingdoms past. You knew you couldn't tie him here. You felt lucky to even have the luxury to hold him as you slept, to have him tie your apron behind your back every day and to dance with you and the broom as you swept the floor ("I think I prefer the broom," you'd say, just to see him pout. And like clockwork, he would, and you'd kiss him, and kiss and kiss and kiss).

Now, he packs his bags to study magic in the royal city.

You feel the heavy sway of your heart in the pit of your chest. You've watched many adventurers go, but for some reason, you could never bring yourself to prepare for this moment.

He sits amidst a small disaster in your shared room. "Don't forget your lucky tiger," you remind him, leaning against the doorframe. It's a shitty, dilapidated little thing you sewed together for one of his birthdays. But he kept it, and for someone who loses a lot of things, that certainly was a special feat.

"How could I?" He holds an offended hand to his chest and kisses the bundle of threads, and you feel like bursting into a million tears.

He blows you a kiss at the doorstep.

"Not a real one, because that's for when I come back," he says.

How soon is when? You want to ask. You think of that heat-stained afternoon in the garden, where you crossed hands and hearts but your mind was a million miles away. I don't know was a hell of an answer to hold onto, but he didn't give you much of an option.

Soonyoung lingers at the doorstep. You wonder if he expects you to find another reason to stop him.

Instead, you watch him disappear down the sandy bend of the road, going, going, gone. The lonely dance of the innkeeper, the choreographed parting you had grown accustomed to.

Your life has been a series of goodbyes, but this one, just this once, dies on your tongue.

iii.

It's at the end of a grueling, mind-numbing day—every spring, the traveling mercenaries migrate to the royal kingdom, your small inn a pit stop on the way—when you see Soonyoung for the first time in years.

You're at the faraway market, the one in the royal city, to pick up supplies.

He's taller, broader. He walks with a certainty in his step, one that's forgotten when he runs to you with abandon.

Soonyoung sweeps you up, as easily as ever, hands firm around your waist to lift you so your faces are level. He's stronger, too.

"Soonyoung," you breathe, giddy. His lips find your neck; he's kissing, giggling, breathing you back in. "What are you doing here?"

"Wanted to ask you the same." He grins, all lopsided and toothy, and your heart balloons to some inhuman size. "I live here, you know."

"But your letters—thought the magic school wouldn't let you leave."

"I snuck out," he says, pressing his forehead to yours. "Wanted to come home. See you."

Home. Home. You roll the word around in your head. Soonyoung never called the inn home; he always wanted to be everywhere at once, and yet something kept him there. The thought that it was you presses against your ribs, a crushing swell of guilt and joy all in one.

"Watch," he says, still as exuberant as ever. And even before you roll your eyes, he's insistent—"I'm good now, I promise!"

Protection magic, he calls it. A force field. He's come a long way from a flame barely able to cook an egg.

"It's like you're untouchable," you laugh, pressing the flat of your palm over the shimmering plane before Soonyoung's hand, feeling it pulse against you like a magnet.

"Almost." And then the pressure's gone, replaced by the warm callouses of his skin on yours as the magic dissipates. "Never for you."

And again, you think about how uncanny it is that you and Soonyoung fell in love—the dutiful innkeeper and the restless adventurer.

Who, but you, would he ever let touch him?

It's then you remember how Soonyoung's hand has always fit perfectly in yours.

—

Soonyoung accompanies you back to the inn—"They won't miss me for a night," he had said.

And so you're back in the garden, sitting shoulder to shoulder under the ivy and magnolias.

Although it's been years, his presence grounds you. Everything from the way he squeezes your hand when he talks, the glimmer in his eyes, how he steals a kiss mid-conversation brings you back to when you fell in love all those years ago.

But nothing could have prepared you for when Soonyoung asks you to live with him in the royal city.

He had been asked to join the mages' court at the palace, a permanent, demanding position. That was the real reason he wanted to see you, he tells you.

"Let Mingyu take over. You know he wants to!" Soonyoung laughs like it's a joke. "Come, make a new home with me. I'll cook the pies. The right way, I promise." His smile is dazzling and heartbreaking at the same time.

You replay the moment he told you he returned because he wanted to come home—to you.

How could you tell him that your real home was here, at the inn? In the roots of the wisteria, in the battered floorboards of the dining room, in the bag of produce you get from the market every morning?

"I—" you start. It tumbles out of your mouth, shredded and broken. "I can't. You know I can't."

He's silent. You think it's because he expected this outcome, that it couldn't be any other way, that you both knew this, innately, the night he first told you he was leaving.

You don't look at each other.

The moon is violet. The sky is black. There are no stars tonight.

And as if piercing a great big divide, he reaches for your hand, the habit now a lifeline as the weight of the moment settles into you.

"But I’ll have you for tonight?" Soonyoung turns to look at you. His eyes are shimmery, earnest.

If you could silence the roar in your head, in your chest, you would instead feel the pressure of an invisible clock, counting the seconds you have left together. You both know you're on borrowed time.

"Soonyoung." Your face is so hot, you aren't sure if you're crying or not. "You'll have me for as long as you want me."

"Silly," he murmurs. "I'll always want you." Your noses are touching; he holds your gaze so you don't see the sadness in his smile. But you already know what he's feeling, the heavy twist of acceptance settling in the both of your stomachs.

It's always been this way with you two—you don't have to see him to know his heart.

And maybe it's this knowledge that guides your hands, your lips, when you trace him into memory on this starless night.

It's another postponed goodbye, you know it is, a prolonged farewell you began years ago but could not bring yourself to end.

You go through the motions in your head, the phantom parting, your eventual final meeting.

But it's something you both accept. Tonight is just another push of the hands of the clock. Another stolen moment.

When Soonyoung kisses your lips with the tenderness of all the years he's loved you, your heart falls right into his hands.

What you have with him isn't forever, but it's something.

This is a goodbye you're willing to wait for.