If That Doesn't Work For You A Silicone Or Rubber Oven Mitt Will, Every Single Time. It's Not About The

If that doesn't work for you a silicone or rubber oven mitt will, every single time. It's not about the strength of your arms but rather grip strength. If your hands are not strong, or you have issues that cause weakness, what you need is to get enough traction. Hope this helps as many people as possible.

🦀 Kudos Crab 🦀

If you are scrolling and see Kudos Crab, your fics will be blessed!

You will get good comments and kudos!

You will beat your writers block!

GO AND WRITE!

Oh, oh... The one glorious moment when one of your "special interest" knowledges can be put to use!

*clears throat*

Alfred Thaddeus Crane Pennyworth, that is his full name for those that didn't know (which was originally Alfred Beagle), is not in fact a "frail and defenseless old man".

He has on numerous occasions donned the cowl so that Bruce could be seen in public as Bruce while Batman is sighted fighting crime. And I repeat, fighting crime. He doesn't just wear it to make a cameo. He responds to the Bat-signal. At one point he even distracted Lex Luthor in his Power Armor until Bruce could arrive.

The reason Bruce trusts him to do this is that Alfred is an ex-Special Operations Executive (SOE) operative of honor and ethics with connections within the intelligence community, he has been called "Batman's Batman". SOE was a British organisation formed in 1940 to conduct espionage, sabotage and reconnaissance in German-occupied Europe and to aid local resistance movements during World War II.

He was also an actor and make-up artist which is why he has disguise expertise and has used these skills to aid Batman in the field. One such skill is that he can impersonate Bruce's voice and has done so over the telephone.

His medical training from the Royal Air Force includes first aid, often suturing wounds and removing bullets, as well as occasional tactical support. The ability to perform arthroscopy, which is a minimally invasive surgical procedure on a joint performed using an arthroscope (an endoscope that is inserted into the joint through a small incision). Arthroscopic procedures diagnose and repair torn joint tissue, such as ligaments, including ACL reconstruction. And several other advanced medical procedures, all of which have severely reduced the number of times anyone in the Bat Family has needed professional medical help. The two times Bruce had to actually get hospital level treatment were when Bane broke his goddamned back and Hush caused his skull to fracture.

His martial arts knowledge includes karate, judo, and taekwondo. He has incorporated other styles over the years and in some stories was the one that trained Bruce before he sought out higher mastery.

Mr. Pennyworth is a man of many skills. In fact, this mo'fo's hobbies include horseback riding, training in sword fighting, archery, computer programming, computer, electrical, chemical and mechanical engineering, nanotechnology, biotechnology research and development which aids in the maintenance of Batman’s various gadgets, machines and experiments, and he likes to read fiction.

He's also a gardener, with a penchant for rose breeding. He's such an accomplished horticulturalist, that he even created his own breed of rose, the Pennyworth Blue.

He feeds the bats, and I didn't mean the ragtag crew of orphans and heroes. Along with cleaning the batcave, he also feeds the bats and has told Bruce they prefer free-range corn-fed chicken goujons, gently fried in olive oil, with chives.

Going back to his aforementioned badassery, he has been unsuccessfully kidnapped over 27 times. 27! All of which he got out of on his own, which at times required him to knock villains out.

And as mentioned above, thanks to his military training he's comfortable with a gun showing a preference for shotguns.

He is the one that repairs all the Bat Family costumes which makes him a master costumer/seamster.

None of the above mentions his actual butlery or that fact that he's been raising Bruce since he was 8, which included teaching him etiquette, ensuring he had a top-notch education so he could take over his father's business, and forcing him to actually live his life as Bruce.

He is also a gourmet chef with multiple culinary expertises. Look at the food Bruce eats, which Alfred often has to nag him to do because he's too distracted.

Regarding his butlery, due to the security risk of Bruce's identity being discovered, Alfred tends to the entirety of Wayne Manor by his damn self.

He also raised Dick by himself as Bruce was focused on being Batman and mainly taught him how to be a hero with rare moments of actual bonding and normal daily life experiences.

He does all of this and keeps his suit perfectly pressed in the process.

In the 60's Alfred was killed when he shoved Bruce and Dick out of the way of a falling boulder. He is then revived by the mad scientist Dr. Brandon Crawford. His regeneration machine had a few flaws in it, however, and Alfred came back different. His skin was pallid with circular markings, he had super strength, telekinesis, and oh yeah, was a supervillain. Yes, you read that correctly. Alfred was the supervillain known as the Outsider who was hellbent on destroying Batman and Robin by getting others to fight them during his elaborate plans. Bruce finally gets him exposed to radiation which resets his personality and takes his powers away.

This isn't the only time he has powers either. In the Injustice: Gods Among Us series, Batman and Superman are fighting because Kal has gotten it in his head that he has to take over the world for its own good. Supes breaks Batman's back during their fight and Alfred doesn't handle it so well. In response he takes a nanotech pill that gives him super-strength and invulnerability, which he then uses to beat the ever living $&@* out of Superman. He pummels him relentlessly then wipes himself clean, picks up Bruce, and gets Zatanna to teleport Bruce to another realm where Superman can't reach him. Go, go papa bear aggro.

*exhales* Thanks for coming to my ThadTalk.

I love how all of the Batman villains are like “ah he’s not at the manor, it’s defenseless! and then alfred just racks an AK-47 and is like pull up bitch

How it feels being a fic writer when the whole fandom is dead, especially when you were into the fandom when it was new and thriving but weren't a writer yet. 😭 I do it for the readers who will follow along the once heavily trafficked, now overgrown paths, that I am carefully clearing and pruning with every inspired word. Our fandoms aren't dead, they're just sleeping and each new fan is a loving caress bringing the sweetest of dreams.

how it feels to start/gif a new show when the whole fandom is dead

Chapter 57: Regal Revelry

The group celebrates Peter's birthday and Claire learns she can affect Gabriel just as much as he does her.