Om Nom Nom

Om nom nom 🍎🌶🍞🍟🍗🧀

slope point, the southernmost tip on new zealand’s south island, is hit with such persistently violent southern antarctic winds that trees grow in the leeward direction. (click pic or link for credit x, x, x, x, x, x)

You know, we never actually saw Hilmes draw Rukhnabad in Fuujin Ranbu. Not when he took it from Kaykhusraw's sarcophagus, and not when he stole it back from Bodin in Maryam in the last episode. And this dialogue from Episode 1 concerning his ability to wield the sword is original to the anime.

So (years after the anime was left unfinished) here is my theory: Hilmes would have found himself unable to draw Rukhnabad, and that would have been fucking HILARIOUS. He gets to some kind of final confrontation and the thing just won't come out of its scabbard for him? Kaykhusraw says no? The gods of Pars (the Master refers to Rukhnabad as 'a gift from the gods' in this scene) have seen what he did to his country and they don't like it?

Funny how in the manga we've currently got Arslan incapable of drawing the sword, yet in the anime maybe it would have been Hilmes! Shame we'll never know what their plans were. Though given how obsessed Hilmes is with his bloodline and right to the throne, there's no way he wouldn't have tried to draw it as soon as it was in his hands. The fact that he never does so (it even looks like he's about to in Maryam and then he just... doesn't!) feels weird and something about all this seems deliberate. Honestly, a moment where he tries and fails would have been funny enough that maybe I would have forgiven the dubious grasp of how Hilmes would act when holding an object that could prove his legitimacy. Maybe.

Finally finished this piece about the toxic beauty standards imposed by my parents while growing up. Painting all those eyes felt both meditating and drove me insane.

TW: child abuse

I included some of the comments my family has made about my appearance over the years, some of which are contradicting, just to show how impossible it was to please their toxic beauty standards. To them, I was always too skinny and too fat at 115lb. And being 5'6 was too short.

My mom told me to get plastic surgery for my monolid eyes, because only double lidded eyes are considered beautiful by Chinese standards. She pointed to her friend's daughter, who did get plastic surgery for her entire face, and said how much better the girl looked, how I should be like that.

My dad commented on my flat chest, asking how come my mom has boobs while I don't. My stepmom pointed out the frown lines around my lips, saying I don't smile enough. My stepmom always bullied me to the point of crying (by calling my mom a whore and such), so she knows exactly why I don't smile enough. My stepdad said my personality is too horrible to get a normal job, so I would have to prostitute myself, but that I'm too ugly to get clients so I would starve. When I told my mom what he said, she told me to stop lying.

After a lot of therapy for my CPTSD, I can look back and realize that they were the ugly ones, in all sense of the word. But for so long I had such little self-esteem, I would avoid photos. At my first artist alley over a decade ago, fans of my art wanted photos with me but I was too ashamed of myself to accept. I've improved a lot and no longer fear being photographed. I still struggle with other aspects of my childhood abuse (a story for a different day), but with each passing year I feel like I'm regaining bits of myself.

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A peek of the painting process, the full hours long videos will be DMed on my Patreon on Sep 5th

I hope you had a wonderful holiday season and a great start to the to new year, @moccino!

General Jimsa performs a traditional Turanian piece at King Arslan’s banquet.

I drew this on A3 paper, so I had to take a photo of it, but I can try and take it to work and scan it in there if you would like a higher resolution image. I wanted to work in as much Turan imagery in as I could, plus everybody’s respective family crests. Isfan’s outfit is a shoutout to Nakamura’s manga version, while fem!Jimsa’s outfit was inspired by Otoyomegatari. For Zaravant I tried to pick out Persian clothes.