ESCAPE FROM WHEYFACE RADIO! AN ARDEN ACTUAL-PLAY MINISERIES COMING DECEMBER 4TH!

ESCAPE FROM WHEYFACE RADIO! AN ARDEN ACTUAL-PLAY MINISERIES COMING DECEMBER 4TH!

When corporate raiders initiate a truly hostile takeover of Wheyface Tower, it's up to Bea Casely, Brenda Bentley, Rosalind Ursula, Julie Capsom, and plucky security guard Janet Dogbury to save the day! Join us, won't you, as we play through the Arden RPG Escape from Wheyface Radio! with cast and friends, in a thrilling four-part miniseries beginning December 4th. Brought to you by Wheyface Industries, which is not currently being taken over. Ignore the men in business suits wielding scimitars and flintlocks. Everything is fine.

Starring: Michelle Agresti, Tracey Sayed, Shannon Estabrook, Lindsay Zana, Emma Sherr-Ziarko, AND ????????

friends, foes, gays and gamers.... if youuuuu can believe it, it's a bandcamp friday once again!

which gives me a good excuse to post my 2021 album bittersweet!! a tour de force of breakbeats, saw waves, vocaloids (GUMI, specifically), autotune, and homosexual melodrama, packaged up into 11 silly little tracks. it's got funky synths! it's got two of the sickest guitar solos known to man! it's got paisley pudge? rateyourmusic calls it "Indietronica" and "Digital Fusion", apparently!

in all sincerity, this album was a labor of love for me, made after a four year long case of creative burnout nearly destroyed my ability to even think about making music. in a lot of ways, this album was a mad dash to finally cut that baggage free and prove that, in spite of everything, i could just make shit again. it wasn't easy, and yeah this album has rough edges, but i am unbelievably proud of what i have to show for that effort.

so whether it's on a bandcamp friday or any other day, if you give this music of mine a listen, i wanna sincerely thank you. hopefully it can inspire the same sort of creative joy in y'all that making it did for me! ❤️💚

Have a look at the list here

Cool dungeon features to make the underworld feel even more weird and cool:

An underground lake. There's a boat moored on the shore. Should the characters get in the boat and follow the flow of the stream, they'll eventually find themselves in what seems like a wide open underground ocean, under a starlit sky. Or if those lights are not stars, what are they?

A forest of mushrooms, tall as trees. Almost like a mockery of the type of fairy tale forest one would hear about in stories from the surface. There's a babbling brook. There's a whole ecosystem of fungal creatures mimicking surface life. Flying mushrooms the size of owls hunting small mushrooms in the shape of rodents. Lumbering fungal deer roam in herds. Is this by design or accident?

An underground city, seemingly abandoned. Everything suggests that there were once people here, living in houses carved into the stone, until they suddenly just weren't there. Shadowy figures seem to stalk the streets, but always flee when a light is shined on them. There is a strange blue light shining on the top floor of a tower in the center of the city.

Idk

Trailer Drop! Camlann releases in January 2024, subscribe now wherever you get your podcasts.

Transcript available here, or click the Read More below.

[Image Description: A blue-back painted background shows mountains that vaguely look like a figure lying down face up under a starry sky. Orange looping text says the title 'Camlann' and 'Subscribe where you get your podcasts'. White bold text says 'Trailer, Listen Now'. A wave form wobbles as the audio plays, and subtitles appear beneath it in white text.]

Camlann - Teaser Trailer Transcript - 6th November 2023

[Camlann is written and directed by Ella Watts and produced by Amber Devereux at Tin Can Audio, with production management from Ross McFarlane. This transcript was written by Ella Watts.]

A dial tone - it’s a low, warm trilling beep which rings in sets of two, six times, before stopping abruptly.

The voice that follows is feminine and light, with a precise English accent. The character speaks with a sense of formality, and formal warmth - like you might find in a hospital.

RECORDING 1:

Please hold. Your call is very important to us and we will get to it as quickly as we can. The Cataclysm is frightening for everyone. Remember, in times like these we need to stick together more than ever. If you need emergency assistance, please call 999 -

The dial tone returns, ringing three times. The voice that follows is light, masculine, with a Scottish accent.

RECORDING 2:

Your position in the queue is -

The voice that follows is androgynous and light, a different Scottish accent to the one before.

RECORDING 3:

Three-hundred and thirty-three

A long, continuous droning beep as the phone connects, which ends abruptly. 

The voice that follows is feminine and Scottish, specifically Glaswegian. She sounds confident, but somewhat rushed - like an emergency phone operator. She is immediately authoritative and polite.

PHONE OPERATOR:

Hello, you’ve reached the Cataclysm Casualties Hotline. Can I take your name and date of birth?

At this point, a very soft static begins to build in the background. 

The first voice we hear is androgynous, English and precise.

PERRY:

Peredur Green

The second voice is a low, feminine voice with a Welsh accent.

MORGAN:

Morgan Jones

The third voice speaks with a Chinese accent, and is light and feminine.

GWEN:

Shújūn Liu

The fourth voice is low and masculine, with a broad Scottish accent. 

GWAINE:

Gwaine Turner

The fifth voice is light and masculine, with a light Welsh accent.

DAI:

Just call me Dai

The Phone Operator is business-like and professional.

PHONE OPERATOR:

Ok, and who are you calling for today?

The static keeps building softly, getting slowly louder. 

Dai sounds frustrated and anxious, and he speaks quickly.

DAI:

My Mum. Siân Thomas? She was in Aberystwyth.

Gwaine speaks firmly and slowly. He falters when he clarifies Kirkwall, revealing his anxiety.

GWAINE:

Matthew and Louise Turner. In Kirkwall on Orkney. 

Gwen sounds audibly anxious, speaking with urgency and a slightly higher pitch.

GWEN:

My father, Kai Liu.

Morgan says Ben’s name as if around a lump in her throat - she sounds sad, like she already knows something has happened to him.

MORGAN:

Ben. Ben Jones. 

Gwaine sounds comfortably skeptical - as if what he’s referring to cannot possibly be true. 

A new drone builds alongside the softly building static - like a swarm of bees or string instruments being played vibrato. It slowly gets louder and louder, a low pitched sense of intensity and dread.

GWAINE:

I saw something on the news about a sea serpent?

Morgan sounds like she’s going to be sick. She’s deadly serious, firm and clearly seriously worried.

MORGAN:

He’s fifteen years old.

Perry is authoritative and comfortable with the bureaucracy, though they still speak with a sense of urgency.

PERRY:

Anna and Sophie Green, in Portsmouth. 

When Gwen speaks, there’s a sense of dread in her voice.

GWEN:

What’s happening in Kowloon?

Perry sounds incredulous and confused as they ask their question, full of disbelief. 

The droning bee swarm sound gets louder, it’s hard to tell if it’s musical or a sound effect, only that it’s building a sense of dread like a horror film.

PERRY:

Listen, is this real? I’ve been seeing news reports about dragons -

The phone operator sounds guarded and distracted when she answers, clearly avoiding the questions.

PHONE OPERATOR:

Let me look that up for you. Where are you calling from today?

Each of the following answers comes quickly and firmly. Gwen’s stands out.

PERRY:

Bristol

MORGAN:

Bristol

GWAINE:

Bristol

DAI:

Bristol

GWEN:

Leicester

The phone operator sounds sincere and sympathetic in the way that a doctor might when delivering bad news to a patient. 

A new sound effect joins the static and drone - background voices or muffled clanging metal, like the echoes you hear in a swimming pool. It sounds strange and surreal, contradicting the sensible pragmatism of the Phone Operator’s delivery.

PHONE OPERATOR:

I’m so sorry, it looks like we haven’t got anyone listed under that name on the database. This means they have’t been listed as a fatality. Call back tomorrow, and if you haven’t heard anything from us or your loved one in three days, try the online form. 

Very softly, music fades in - synthetic strings playing a warm, hopeful folk music kind of melody. The strings build.

PHONE OPERATOR:

I know this is scary, but it’s ok. We’re going to get through this…

Everything pauses - the sound effects, the music, and the Phone Operator herself. There’s a beat of silence.

PHONE OPERATOR:

…together.

The music resumes, louder than before, as everything else fades away. The tune builds from strings into a melodic keyboard like-tune on a synthetic instrument that sounds like fairy lights. The music is warm and hopeful. 

It dips in volume under the following voiceover - delivered by a light, masculine voice with a Welsh accent, the same actor as Dai. His delivery is confident and formal.

VOICEOVER:

Camlann, a post-apocalyptic audio drama by Ella Watts, inspired by folklore and Arthurian legends. Coming January 2024. Produced by Tin Can Audio. 

The music builds - the synthetic keyboard and strings joined by a synth that sounds almost like an organ, building to a gentle, slow crescendo before dipping back down - each instrument falling away until only the strings are left playing the core melody of the tune, more and more quietly until the music fades and the trailer ends.

masks and helmets that hides someone's face in such a way that they become the face themselves my beloved

these are all creatures to me