mommy-thot-speaketh - mommy thot speaks her truth
mommy thot speaks her truth

she/her, it if you wanna be Nasty | almost 9+10 years old | am i ND or just anxious | bisexuwhale | i am a whore in theory and a mother by practice | might post poetry??? | sitcom lover (community, parks and rec, B99, modern family, the office)

84 posts

Look As A Law Student (not In The USA Thank The Random Probability Of The Universe) This Is Completely,

look as a law student (not in the USA thank the random probability of the universe) this is completely, utterly, disgustingly, factually correct. Every time I have to learn something new about why a license differs from a lease I want to squeeze vodka straight out of a potato into my mouth, and I don't even Like alcohol (I've only ever drink a shochu soda that was like 5% to help me through a law module that was basically how to sue a guy 101).

Jeff Winger
Jeff Winger

jeff winger

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More Posts from Mommy-thot-speaketh

6 months ago

late to the convo but i've got dark chocolate, milk and green tea!!! can't bring guns cuz its banned where i'm from but if anyone is open to any sports bat that can bash a head in i would be amenable (to play sports obviously, like @thesaddestjoysandthesmallestlies said NO DEATHS) also don't take hot sauce and chocolate together unless ur tongue is ready to have a programme reset

Bro's, I feel like such a malewife today.

Kill me. uwu


Tags :
6 months ago

wish there were more chicken finger mafia fics i need that early season 1 trobed fluff

6 months ago

britta perry !!!!!!!!!!!!!

britta with a textpost that reads " the sink is designed to contain the faucet. the faucet is built to test the limits of the sink. this is what's known as a relationship, or dynamic, or something "
britta with a tweet that reads " wearing glasses to the library feels like wearing a band's t shirt to their concert "
britta perry from community with a tweet that reads " i'll never be a meal prep girl i much prefer the agony and the ecstasy of scrounging around for sustenance like a dog "
britta with a tweet that reads " whoever said matter cannot be destroyed or created never saw me face this blunt "
britta confronting professor slater with a textpost that reads " just because i smoke the cheapest, most dirt laced, stem packed and weed whacked, dried oregano shred ass, autumn colored trench shit. that pre milled into fucking corn meal type dispo scrap crap. doesn't mean i'm less worthy of love. "
britta with a textpost that reads " maybe cain wouldn't have killed abel if they had video games to healthily channel the violence between siblings. unfortunately back then the only smash brothers they had was smash brothers head in with a rock "
britta perry with a textpost that reads " men invented gay sex so they could have gay sex with each other "
britta with an instagram create post that reads " i need a shock collar that zaps me every time i start liking a man who doesn't care if i live or die "
britta in a cage with an instagram create post that reads " what's your birthstone? mine is rock bottom "
britta with two imessages that read " grr don't " and " you kids and your ooowoooo garbage. not lit "

all image descriptions in alt text !!

6 months ago

Hey. Minors following me. Internet safety is key!! NEVER include these in your bio/byf:

Medical diagnoses - this is nobody's business but yours. You don't owe anyone an explanation for why you are the way that you are

Trauma - same reason as above

Triggers - people can use these against you! Don't give people tools to hurt you. No one has to know what tags you block. Just block tags to stay safe!

Age - age is okay for adults to include but is iffy when you're a teen. Predators want this information, don't give people more than they need. Just state that you're a minor, that's all that anyone needs to know.

In general: stay safe. If you're not comfortable with every stranger out there having access to this information, you shouldn't post it on the internet.

Play devil's advocate and ask yourself about what would happen if someone searched for your information with intent to hurt you. You do NOT owe anyone an explanation!

6 months ago

Community would've been one of the greatest shows in existence for their ABBA-scored costumed halloween party zombie apocalypse episode alone and YET it's almost directly followed by perhaps the best bottle episode to have ever been made