Struggling Lately With Finding The Motivation To Do Things Which Is Especially Rough When Ive Built So

Struggling lately with finding the motivation to do things which is especially rough when I’ve built so much of my self-worth and fulfillment on being able to do things well. When working full time, near the end it just felt like burn out but now that I’m venturing back into furthering my education it’s just been getting worse. I feel bad because I’m not completing anything and I don’t want to complete anything because I feel bad. Searching for that magic solution that will stop the cycle.

Center for Renaissance and Reformation Studies (UofTears)

A couple years ago, I was staying with a friend for New Year’s and we’d decided to drive down to this adorable strip of locally-owned small business shops and check them out. The bakery was particularly crowded and since I wasn’t planning to buy anything, I waited outside. It’d been snowing, and since moving I’d picked up a “Californian-experiences-true-midwest-winter-for-the-first-time” habit of making at least one (1) tiny snowman every opportunity I get

so I built a little snowman on one of the small tables on this strip. 

after about three minutes of cramming ice together, I hear, “Do you want espresso beans for the eyes?” and I turn around and there’s this gal leaning precariously far out the window of her coffee shop, surrounded by her coworkers, holding out her hand and said espresso beans.

I think of those strangers often. just the thought of them all looking out the window to see this random stranger on the corner in the snow building a tiny snowman and deciding to join in, make it special for no other reason than that they wanted to. people are so, so precious and I’m never going to forget that moment.

A windy day with a moderate temperature will make you feel like you got reborn into a world that really loves you this time