THIS SON OF A BITCH

THIS SON OF A BITCH

“if you liked this title you may enjoy” but with animal species

i don't know much but its a celebration where kids get gifts and there is usually a parade idk man

look it up

I will make one (1.0) Christmas post this year, because it is necessary to inform you of

THE POOP LOG

The Poop Log! The Xmas Poop Log! The POOPING CHRISTMAS LOG that POOPS GIFTS!!!!

Meet the traditional Catalan equivalent of Christmas stockings, except so much betterworse. The Tió de Nadal (“Christmas Log”) is colloquially know as Caga Tió, literally SHIT LOG or POOP LOG. I ‘shit’ you not!

Kids leave little morsels of food for the Poop Log to ‘eat’ every night, and cover it in a blanket. The idea is to keep your Shit Log warm and fed, so that on Christmas it will poop a lot of gifts!

Which is why, on Christmas morning, kids get to BEAT THE LITERAL AND FIGURATIVE SHIT OUT OF IT!

Sort of like a pinata. Which is giving me strange revelations about my childhood birthday parties.

Parents hide small gifts & sweets under the blanket for the children to find afterwards. Oh, and there’s a whole song that kids sing while whacking the poor wooden bastard with sticks. It’s a fun little ditty that is basically just threats of grevious bodily harm set to music. Here’s one version of the lyrics:

Shit, tió, hazelnuts and nougats,

do not shit herrings, they are too salty,

shit nougats, almonds and nougats,

they taste better!

Shit, tió, and if you don’t want to shit

I will hit you with a stick!

Shit, tió!

and you can listen to the song here :)

(src)

PUKI FOR WORLD DOMINATION!

Do you ever get tired of being an internet funny man? You do realize that by ratio you will only be pukichu to more people than you ever will be anything else?

Maybe if my aspirations ended there you’d be right, but I have way more plans for my future, some projects I’ve already begun working on and I can’t wait to show you guys :)

reblog if you think sign language should be taught as a language in schools.

🗣🗣🗣🗣🗣

Do ever just. Move your sleeping point around? Like not as in swapping bedrooms, but more as in moving your mattress around or piling 2or more blankets under you ,curling up inside and sleeping in random places

And i pass the message to my 2 followers (exept the map shit we call em that cuz we are used to getting censored)

If you call pedophilia a kink please unfollow me and never talk to me again