Nikki Giovanni, FromMirrors

Nikki Giovanni, from “Mirrors”

[Text ID: … but It Cannot Be A Mistake to have cared … It Cannot Be An Error to have tried … It Cannot Be Incorrect to have loved]

Beverly Engel, Healing Your Emotional Self

“I don’t have to attend every argument I’m invited to.”

—

Dorothy Parker

Anne Boyer

Boring.

Abusive narcissists love to hurt us. The more emotion we show, the happier they are.  If you can’t or aren’t ready to go No Contact with your abusive narcissist, the key is to be as utterly boring as possible.  Be Boring.  Ignore the jibes, the jokes at your expense, the put downs, the comparisons to others. Do not react at all. As hard as this is, remember that they cannot enjoy hurting you if you do not react.  Be Boring.  Do not tell them any of your personal information. If there is something you are happy about, don’t give them a chance to ruin it. If there is something you are sad about, don’t give them the chance to enjoy your pain.  Be Boring.  Keep conversations light, talk about the weather or the scenery or turn the conversation to something about them.. They will be happy to tell you all about their latest holiday for the 17th time and will forget to be rude to you.  Be Boring.  Because, abusive narcissists need and want to hurt you in order to fell better about themselves… Why should abusive narcissists get to feel better bout themselves? Be Boring.  Yes, they may escalate their behaviour, they may up their slander campaigns  but, you are getting good at this now. They have nothing to show from their bad behaviour. You didn’t react. It will only serve in the end to make them look bad to others.  Be Boring, save everything interesting and beautiful about you for those who deserve it.  <3