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Ninnieamee - Tumblr Blog
consciousness is a gift but it is has tricked us into thinking that we can simply will ourselves into higher or otherwise more improved versions of our person through endless introspection. all other creatures in the animal kingdom recognize that change only comes from action…..when a lizard feels sick, they’ll lay in the sun because they know sunlight manufactures much needed nutrients. there is very limited action -> reaction in the darkness of your skull unless it’s in some way informed by the things happening around you, and “growth” being isolated in this way can only serve to endlessly recontextualize thoughts, memories and feelings to the point where they are rendered irrelevant to the reality they were based in. I wrote this paragraph largely just to deliver that lizard fact.
Jonice Webb, Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect
Nikki Giovanni, from “Mirrors”
[Text ID: … but It Cannot Be A Mistake to have cared … It Cannot Be An Error to have tried … It Cannot Be Incorrect to have loved]
Bessel van der Kolk, The Body Keeps the Score
““if you are free, you need to free somebody else. If you have some power, then your job is to empower somebody else.” ― Toni Morrison”
— (via yourpersonalcheerleader)
“When deciding whom to trust, bear in mind that the combination of consistently bad or egregiously inadequate behavior with frequent plays for your pity is as close to a warning mark on a conscienceless person’s forehead as you will ever be given.”
— Martha Stout
“‘I wish it need not have happened in my lifetime,’ said Frodo. ‘So do I,’ said Gandalf, ‘and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what do with the time given us.’”
— J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring
Boring.
Abusive narcissists love to hurt us. The more emotion we show, the happier they are. If you can’t or aren’t ready to go No Contact with your abusive narcissist, the key is to be as utterly boring as possible. Be Boring. Ignore the jibes, the jokes at your expense, the put downs, the comparisons to others. Do not react at all. As hard as this is, remember that they cannot enjoy hurting you if you do not react. Be Boring. Do not tell them any of your personal information. If there is something you are happy about, don’t give them a chance to ruin it. If there is something you are sad about, don’t give them the chance to enjoy your pain. Be Boring. Keep conversations light, talk about the weather or the scenery or turn the conversation to something about them.. They will be happy to tell you all about their latest holiday for the 17th time and will forget to be rude to you. Be Boring. Because, abusive narcissists need and want to hurt you in order to fell better about themselves… Why should abusive narcissists get to feel better bout themselves? Be Boring. Yes, they may escalate their behaviour, they may up their slander campaigns but, you are getting good at this now. They have nothing to show from their bad behaviour. You didn’t react. It will only serve in the end to make them look bad to others. Be Boring, save everything interesting and beautiful about you for those who deserve it. <3
Cheryl Strayed, Tiny Beautiful Things: Advice on Love and Life from Dear Sugar
Source
from “James Baldwin, The Art of Fiction No. 78,” interviewed by Jordan Elgrably, Paris Review (no. 91, Spring 1984)
“You cannot love a person who hates himself. And on this unfortunate earth, almost everybody hates himself, everybody condemns himself. How can you love a person who is condemnatory toward himself? He will not believe you. He cannot love himself—how can you dare? He cannot love himself—how can you love him? He will suspect some game, some trick, some trip. He will suspect that you are trying to deceive him in the name of love. He will be very cautious, alert, and his suspicion will poison your being. If you love a person who hates himself, you are trying to destroy his concept about himself. And nobody easily drops his concept about himself; that is his identity. He will fight with you, he will prove to you that he is right and you are wrong.”
— Osho, Intimacy: Trusting Oneself and the Other
always remember that love will always come back to u. in a different form, different person, different hobby, different touch. but in any way, love will always come back.
Bertolt Brecht on casting a play.
Anne Boyer
“I don’t have to attend every argument I’m invited to.”
—
Dorothy Parker
Beverly Engel, Healing Your Emotional Self
