You Know, I'm A Huge Fan Of Mirkwood Elves Being Considered Creepy And Downright Terrifying By Almost

You know, I'm a huge fan of mirkwood elves being considered creepy and downright terrifying by almost everyone on Middle Earth, even by other elves. Your headcanons of them being nocturnal and eating the fuckin spawn of ungoliant of all things add on to this, sooo, can I have some incorrect quotes about some scary elves?

As asked for, some incorrect quotes:

Legolas: *starting to gut the spider carcasses after a skirmish*

The twins, who are visiting: what are you doing?!

Legolas: look, we can share if you want-

~~~~~

*in Imlardis*

The twins: *throw the curtains wide open* good morning!

Legolas: *hisses* wHAT DEVILISH CONTRAPTION-

~~~~~~~~~

Elrond: *talking about how food is scarce atm in Imlardis*

Thranduil: *pauses* you kill dozens of orcs on the regular, and you still don’t have enough food?

~~~~~~~~~

Faramir: I heard that those elves of Mirkwood will eat anyone and anything they deem an enemy.

Aragorn: oh, that’s an exaggeration-

Legolas:......

Aragorn: that’s an exaggeration, right legolas-

~~~~~~~~~~

Legolas: you two are like the sun

The twins: awww, thank you-

Legolas: a nuisance.

~~~~~~~~~~

Legolas: look if you’re stupid enough to challenge my people, you get eaten if you loose. That’s the rules of engagement.

~~~~~~~~~~

Thranduil: nighttime is Funtime

*silvans cackling in the distance as they slaughter all who cross their path*

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thranduil: of course I would never hurt a tree! They are Eru’s gift to the universe!

Thranduil: you, however-

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Galion: oh, the noldor are always like “oh no! The darkness! By god what will we do when there are no farms! The night is so scary”

Galion: bitch, what do you think life was like before ya’ll came?

~~~~~~~~~~~

Legolas: Eru may judge me, but honestly, fuck him.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Legolas: *dragging a spider corpse* life’s too short to care about other people’s opinions-

Aragorn: you’re immortal!

Legolas: fine, life’s too long to care about other people’s opinions. Happy?

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Glorfindel: alright, looks like- wHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?

Arwen:*snacking on a spider leg* this is really good!

Legolas, vibrating with excitement: I know, right!?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*in valinor post lotr*

Gandalf: ok, Thranduil has finally sailed, which means I need to get out of here before he catches me because he will definitely eat me for endangering his son-

Thranduil: hello, Gandalf!

Gandalf: *incoherent screaming*

fuck yeah, a squirrel

her

ok since i don't think i've seen any semi-comprehensive lists of the tumblr holidays for the reddit refugees, here it is.

IT JUST HAPPENS

DAY 15 GIVE IT UP FOR DAY 15

Thursday the 20th

The Fifth of Wednesday

Sometime in June: That One Halloween Post Starts Circulating

Sometime in July: Dancing Pumpkin Man Video/Gif

WEEKLY EVENTS

Every Monday: El Muchacho Monday

Every Tuesday: Tuesday Again? No Problem...

Every Wednesday: Wet Beast Wednesday

Every Thursday: Out of Touch Thursday

Every Friday: Flat Fuck Friday

Every Saturday: Don't @ Me, I'm Chilling/Caturday

Every Sunday: Fingers In His Ass Sunday

YEARLY EVENTS

January 16: Appreciate a Dragon Day

January 29: Threshold Day

All of February: Funguary

February 14: Aromantic/Asexual Day

March 9: Miku Day

March 10: Mario Day

March 14: Pi Day

March 15: Ides of March

March 23: Ever Given Got Stuck Today

April 1: Mishapocalypse

April 2: Dashcon Announcement Anniversary

April 3: Dannypocalypse

April 8: Rex Manning Day

ALSO April 8: MARGARET THATCHER IS DEAD

April 13: Neil Banging Out The Tunes

ALSO April 13: Homestuck Day

April 20: haha 420 blaze it

April 25: The Perfect Date

April 28: Ed Balls Day

April 30: It's Gonna Be May

All of May: Mermay

May 3: Beginning of Dracula Daily

May 4: May the 4th Be With You

May 5: Revenge of the Fifth

May 25: The Glorious 25th of May

All of June: Pride Month

ALSO All of June: IT'S HALLOWEEN TIME TO GET SPOOKY

June 5: Barricade Day

June 16: Let Papyrus Say Fuck

July 20: Moon Landing

September 8: The Queen Is Dead and Sans Undertale Killed Her

September 21: DO YOU REMEMBER-

All of October: SKELETON WAR

ALSO All of October: Inktober

October 3: Mean Girls Day

ALSO October 3: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood Day

October 20: Unnecessary Feelings Day

October 31: HALLOWEEN

November 5: honestly what didn't happen that day

November 19: Goncharov

All of December: Will the Gävle Goat Get Destroyed Again?

December 10: Please, It's Christmas

December 24: ALMOST CHRISTMAS MEANS IT WASN'T CHRISTMAS

Happy birthday Kaiju!

If you see this post you have to say happy birthday to my lizard

She is ten* now!

She loathes the party hat

but she LOVED the cake.

She is very good and very beautiful and loves people and attention and going on walks.

She is my best friend and I think everybody should say happy birthday to Kaiju!

*Approximately. She was about one when I got her, and I’ve had her for nine years, so we’re calling her ten.

Tumblr Migration 2: Reddit Boogaloo

We all know about the Twitter immigrants, but there seems to be radio silence on what's happening now with Reddit users from certain subreddits doing a similar thing.

What's happening?

Reddit is restricting their API later this month and killing off third-party apps. An AMA (Ask Me Anything) with the CEO Steve Hoffman was held and it was clear that he would continue with the changes.

In protest, thousands of subreddits across the site are planning to go dark for 48 hours on June 12th. Some are planning to continue indefinitely until the changes are reversed.

Okay, so how does this affect Tumblr?

Some subreddits (mainly queer and left-leaning meme ones, don't worry too much about Reddit Atheists™ overrunning us) are encouraging their users to jump ship to our beloved - and beloathed - hellsite. There will be another influx of new users and many will be unfamiliar with how the site works.

What do us Tumblr users do?

Show them how to use the site; introduce them to the site's culture, tell them to reblog shit and curate their dashboard. Sorta like how we welcomed Twitter users back when they flocked here. Kungpowpenising optional.

I'm new from Reddit, what do I do here?

CHANGE YOUR PROFILE PICTURE AND BANNER TO SOMETHING OTHER THAN DEFAULT BECAUSE THIS SITE IS FILLED WITH BOTS AND YOU MIGHT BE MISTAKEN FOR ONE. This is the FIRST thing you should do after getting a blog.

Other folks can help you with stuff like curating your dashboard or creating sideblogs (or you can look shit up) but please, PLEASE just give yourself an icon and reblog some stuff so people don't mistake you for a bot