Hello, Its Me Gem Again It's Been A Whirlwind Of A Few Months Watching My Fic Get Notes. I Really Had

Hello, Its me Gem again ✧⭑๋ It's been a whirlwind of a few months watching my fic get notes. I really had no idea it would take off like that and get so much traction! I really appreciate all the love ♡⋆ I have a few fic ideas I've been sitting on trying to get the momentum to write, however life has been incredibly busy. Here is a few:

1) A continuation of Are You Sure? set farther into the future. I wonder what reader and Minho's relationship looks like after a year? Are they doing okay? Are they living together? 2) One shot based off of Minho crushing garlic. Featuring a bratty reader, established relationship, dom/sub antics, having fun in the kitchen. Basically all smut, lol. Here is a snippet of what I have written for that:

3) Friends to lovers, Bang Chan and reader. I think it would be fun to create a new fresh story of how I think Chan would be in that situation. I haven't decided the complete storyline but I have written some interactions. I'm not sure when these will come out but I hope you guys enjoy when the time comes for me to post them. If you have any thoughts or ideas to send to me that you think would fit my writing style, I encourage you to send them my way! I'm also not used to writing or posting on tumblr so I apologize if my posts don't look as fun or special. I'll do my best to work on it! Thanks so much for enjoying my fic! I hope I can continue to provide you with some more fun stories ꨄ︎

& if you haven't read my first fic yet here is a link:

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Are You Sure?

Hello, the name is Gem ✧⭑๋ This is the first fic I have ever written, and I have been sitting on it for a few months entirely too nervous t

𝒯𝒽𝒾𝓇𝒹 𝒟𝒶𝓉𝑒

Kim Seungmin/Female Reader

wc: 8.5k

rating: mature/explicit ಇ

comments: part three was heavily edited from it's original version. There are most likely some grammatical errors that I've glossed over from staring at the screen for so long. Feel free to send a message and let me know if you see anything wildly wrong.

→ PART ONE

→ PART TWO

Part 3 of 4

“You can’t be nervous if I’m nervous.”

He’s right. You take a deep breath and turn to face him again. Kiss him on the lips. Your free hand snakes around his waist, finds the hem of his shirt, and tucks underneath to run over his skin.

His muscles tighten for a second, then slowly relax as your hand moves upward against his side and back across his shoulder blade. He sighs as you touch him.

You haven’t felt this much of his body until now.

-

Your plane lands four hours later than scheduled. You’re tired, hungry, and your back is killing you. Korea Air is fine, and it always has been, but 13 hours in coach is something you’ll never get used to.

There were no plans to travel home up until three days ago, and it’s a miracle you got the week off to deal with your family. As much as you hate doing it, you don’t mind a change of scenery and a break from your typical work days in Korea.

Honestly, this is the perfect solution to the loneliness and monotony. It was only three weeks ago that you finally got to see Seungmin again, but it’s been a long three weeks. And he has kept his promise of keeping in touch.

Every single day since date number two, he's sent at least one text. You try to send messages only when he does, but occasionally you can’t help yourself, and you send something in the middle of your work day, or right before you go to bed. You’re still a little worried about being a bother, and holding back your clingy-ness has been difficult, but he always sends something back. Not always right away, but he does answer. And he sends selfies often—those texts are your favorite.

You have failed to mention that you’ve been on your way to Chicago (he sent a text about two hours ago, letting you know the first two shows had gone well), and that you’d be arriving the day before he would also be in the same city. But you’ll let him know soon. You don’t have much hope for getting to see him while you’re both here; he’s busy, and the last thing you want to do is bother him during a tight schedule. But he's been the only thing on your mind for weeks.

You managed to get a ticket to the Chicago concert the night you realized you be in town for it, but it wasn’t cheap. Even if you don’t get to see him alone, seeing him on stage will be worth the price.

____

“Who are you talking to?”

There’s a giggle in his ear, and a sharp chin lands on his shoulder. “Why are you smiliiing?”

IN grabs Seungmin’s shoulders and takes a seat directly behind him, giving him a good view of the phone in his friends hands.

“Don’t be nosy.”

“Is it the girl you’ve been talking to?”

Seungmin half turns and stares at IN, then looks him up and down, “What are you talking about?”

IN stares back wordlessly, a grin plastered on his face. He’s squinting his eyes at him accusingly. “I’m talking about the girl you’re always texting.”

Seungmin picks up his iced coffee, takes a sip, then releases himself from IN’s stare.

IN follows him across the room.

“Send her a cute selfie.”

“I already did.”

“Oh, haha!” He beams with pride at thinking he got him to slip up. “Did she send one back? Can I see her?”

“No. And no.”

“I won’t tell anyone else, I promise.”

“How did you know if nobody else knows?”

IN stops and thinks for a moment, then he side-eyes the other two members that are currently in the same room. They’re too far away to hear the conversation, but Seungmin stands and heads over to them.

“Chan?”

Chan turns and looks at him with a smile. He doesn’t get a chance to speak before Seungmin does.

“Did you tell IN about her?”

It takes him a few seconds to process what he’s being asked. “No, no…I didn’t tell anyone.” his voice lowers as he realizes what they’re talking about.

“How does he know?”

Chan peaks around him at IN, who’s already staring wide eyed. He beckons him over with two fingers, and he runs over, unbothered.

“How do you know?” He asks softly, very curiously. “I didn’t tell you.”

“I just guessed.”

Seungmin and Chan stare, speechless.

“I always see him smiling and laughing while he’s texting, and then taking selfies. I didn’t know he was actually texting…” he looks around at the others that just walked into the room. “…texting someone.” He whispers the last part.

“The less people that know, the better…” Chan says, but casually, as if he knows he doesn’t really have to tell IN. “It’s nothing serious, right Seungmin?”

“Huh…” he feels his phone buzz in his pocket. “Oh um, no…it’s not.”

Chan stares a little longer, “is it?”

Seungmin feels like his mind is being read. “We just talk a lot.”

He nods and leaves it at that. IN smiles at Seungmin once more before walking off. Then he pulls his phone out to check his notification.

Sounds like you guys had a good time. I did catch some fan videos from last night!

He smiles at the text, and then wonders what you’re doing up at four in the morning.

____

You pull out your phone, hoping the buzz in your pocket is him.

What are you doing up so late? Are you okay?

Oh, you forgot about the time difference. Maybe it’s time to let him know you’re not in Korea.

“I’m okay. I just landed in Chicago. I had a family thing come up, and I had to come home. I promise I’m not following you.”

You see him typing a few seconds after your message is delivered.

oh, you’re from Chicago! That’s so exciting that you’re here. Are you coming to the concert tomorrow night? Please come!

Before you have time to reply, he’s typing again…

Maybe not if you have family to see

“No, I’ll be there. I wouldn’t miss it”

let me know what seats you have…maybe I can get you closer

You’re trying to text him and stuff your bags into the trunk of you moms car at the same time.

“I don’t think they’re very close, but I’ll let you know as soon as I get home”

don’t worry, I’ll figure something out

“What are you so smiley about?” Your mom asks and slams the trunk shut.

“Just a text.”

____

“Sooo…”

“Soooo what?” Seungmin glances at IN. He has an inkling about what he’s getting at, and he’s trying not to indulge him too much. But Seungmin will admit that if any of them were going to find out prematurely, he's glad it was him.

“Can I see her?” He’s careful and quiet saying it. “Please?”

“Fine, give me a second.” He types a quick message and then pulls up the photos you’ve both shared. He finds one of the very few selfies you’ve sent him and shoves it a few inches from IN’s face.

He looks and his eyes widen, smirk grows. “Oh she’s not…” he stops himself and lowers his excited voice, “she’s not Korean? Oh she sent a text.” He giggled and tries to finish reading before Seungmin pulls the phone back.

“No, she’s not.”

“Where is she from?”

“Chicago. She’s here now, too.”

“Oh she’s gonna come see us tomorrow!”

Seungmin nods and types, “yeah, she is coming. I need to get her a better seat.”

“Sneak her into soundcheck.“

____

The next morning, you wake up to the buzzing of a text notification. A Seungmin message. You open it up and squint through sleepy, jet-lagged eyes. It’s barely 8 am. You slept an entire ten hours, at least.

Good morning 🤍 if you’re able to, come down to the venue at around 2!

A close-up selfie follows. You can only see his eye, a peace sign, and a little bit of hair.

And a heart emoji. That combination is a first.

You reply, set an alarm, and immediately fall back asleep.

And luckily, you don’t sleep through it. At eleven, you’re up, nervous, showered, more nervous, and then when it’s time to figure out your wardrobe, you feel like you’re going to puke. Knowing you’ll see Seungmin is keeping most of your nerves at bay, but the fact that it’ll be at an arena of this size, with this many people (you assume there will be a massive amount of fans already hanging around that early, because you know how concerts here are), and throw in the possibility of meeting his friends…you’re nervous.

____

It’s as busy near the venue as you expected. And you find yourself enjoying it, surprisingly. Seeing all of the fans gathered around and clearly having a good time, despite the heat, is nice.

You jump out of your Uber and send a text to Seungmin. You need a more accurate location to head to, but for now you don’t mind wandering around and people watching. Just a glance at someone seems to immediately give away their favorite member, and you make it a point to look for anyone who prefers your favorite.

A text message buzzes before you get too far.

there is a staff entrance at the box office, just walk in and pretend like you belong

That sounds like a terrible idea, but you trust him and head in that direction. It’s not very busy there, because the tickets have long since sold out, but there are staff members milling around. You don’t look like you belong, but you also know that attitude and demeanor can get you far, so…

____

Seungmin only mentioned his plan (IN’s, really) to Chan about ten minutes prior to his last message to you.

“I don’t know if that was the best idea,” he says. “Is she already here?”

“Yes, she’s somewhere outside. And I know.”

“Okay, I might have a solution. Wait here.”

Chan disappears for a few minutes, and in the meantime, Seungmin actually starts to feel a little nervous. His plan was simple: have you walk casually in through the staff entrance he’s already seen used many times that days, by many different people—some with and some without staff shirts or lanyards.

“Even if she gets in using your terrible plan,” Chan returns, and behind him is a man much larger and taller than either of them. “She can’t walk around alone or with you the entire time.”

“She gets her own bodyguard!”

“Chaperone. And she won’t look too out of place with him. “

“Thanks, Chan. Thank you, Jay.”

“No problem, buddy. Let’s go find her before she gets lost.” Jay pats Seungmin on the back and leads him down the hallway. “What does she look like?”

It’s a long walk toward the entrance, but both of them scan every person and group as they pass by. It gives the butterflies in his stomach more time to move up to his chest and throat.

“She’s right there!” Seungmin waves and gets your attention before approaching. He doesn’t want to make a scene, so he waits until none of the venue staff is around.

You have a hard time containing yourself when you finally catch sight of him. You don’t remember him ever smiling as wide as he is right now, and it makes your legs tremble a little.

You wave and wait for him to reach you.

“Hey…” Seungmin stands a few feet from you. He seems a little uneasy.

The man following behind him is obviously trying to keep some distance, but not too much distance. “I can turn away if it makes you both more comfortable.”

“No Jay, you’re fine,” Seungmin laughs but doesn’t look away from you.

“Is this your bodyguard?”

“He is, actually. But today he’s going to hang out with you so you don’t look out of place, and you have someone who knows what’s going on.”

“Oh, that's a relief.”

“But I’ll take you to our dressing room if you’d like…if you want to meet everyone."

"I'm...I do, but do you think it's too much? I mean, too much too soon?"

"Meeting them?" He thinks about it. His mouth is pushed to one side, puffing up his cheek. "I don't mind if you want to wait. We can always just go right out by the stage for soundcheck. You'll see them out there, they'll probably see you. You'll be a mystery."

"I like that idea. Maybe afterward I'll feel better about it."

He nods and waves Jay over. He still hasn’t taken his eyes off of you.

“You look nice.” He lowers his voice and and drops his gaze to the floor. But you can still see his smile.

____

You’re sitting a few rows back from the main stage. Your chaperone is a few yards away and much more relaxed out here. There are so many people working the sound check that your extra face is hardly out of place, so now you feel like you can relax and enjoy the view.

All eight of them are on stage, along with a few band members, and some techs. There’s a camera filming everything just off stage, and another directly on stage with them. You watch Seungmin as he interacts with it. He looks relaxed and happy. No more worry in his eyes.

You get out the earplugs he gave you, but for now you just enjoy listening to him speak into his mic and headset. He looks at you a few times, but subtly, trying not to direct too much attention.

One of the others keeps looking your way, you assume out of confusion or curiosity. Or both. It’s Lee Know. You watch as he walks along the edge of the stage closest to where you’re sitting. Another member joins him and looks out; this one is smiling, almost as wide as Seungmin smiled at you earlier. You know who everyone is thanks to the endless videos you've watched. It's IN.

You try not to make too much eye contact, but you don’t avoid them completely. They seem to know who you are.

Your chaperone appears next to again and takes a seat, “having a good time?”

“I am, thank you for dealing with me.”

“No problem, anything for these boys.”

“Do you know them well?”

“I’ve been working with them for a while now, so I’d say I do. How’d a girl like you meet Mr. Kim?”

The Mr. Kim is said with a bit of sarcasm, but a cute, playful sarcasm. And by a girl like you, you assume he means an American.

“I live in Korea, near where he grew up. We met through a friend. Do we seem like a weird match? I mean…we’re not a couple—"

“Are you sure about that? He’s looking at you right now with those big puppy dog eyes.”

Jay points up to Seungmin. When you look, he quickly smiles and waves before running back to the center of the stage.

____

Your adrenaline is off the charts at the end of the concert. You had an idea of what to expect from footage of other concerts, but being there in person, watching them…watching him, was obviously on another level. You feel like you’ve been introduced to a new little part of Seungmin’s personality. You feel closer to him.

Now you’re back outside in the fresh night air. You haven’t heard from him yet, but you’re not surprised. He’s probably exhausted. You stick around, though. He didn’t mention anything about seeing each other after the concert ended, so you don’t assume anything or get your hopes up (even though they are, by default, always up when it comes to him).

A small group of girls—you can’t really tell how old, maybe around your age—find a place to sit near you. They’re understandably excited and very loud, so you listen in as they talk about their favorite parts, favorite songs, and biases. The loudest of the group is a Felix fan. You sneak a glance at them and one of them notices you.

She waves, “are you here alone?”

You look around and then point to yourself, “Me? Oh, yeah I am.”

The rest of them wave you over with such enthusiasm that you can’t possibly deny them your presence.

“Was it your first concert? It was mine, but not theirs. We’re flying to California for the first two next week.” The girl who looks the youngest, and has a Han Quokka plush strapped to her gestures to the whole group. “Are you going to any more?”

“This is the only one I got a ticket for, so probably not.

“Who’s you bias?” The one who spoke to you first asks.

You hesitate for a moment. Who is your bias?

“It’s Seungmin.”

The girl continues talking, but you’re distracted by the buzzing of your phone. It’s him.

you are still around, yeah?

“Of course! I’m outside”

Now he’s calling. “Sorry, I gotta get this!” You excuse yourself from the group and answer.

“Hi, it’s a little loud out here.”

“Okay, I just figured calling would be easier. Come back in the way you did earlier, I’m already here.”

“Okay, I’m near there. Give me 10 seconds.”

He starts counting down…

“Okay…nine…”

You laugh and speed up a little—

“Eight…”

—but there are more people here and dodging them is not easy.

“Seven…six…five…”

“Count slower!”

“Fooooouur…three…”

You see the door and push through a couple much harder than you intend, but your hand is pushing the door open just as Seungmin says—

“Two! You did it!”

He’s a good distance away, but you can see his smile. He takes a few steps toward you, but lets you finish closing the gap. He holds out his arms and pulls you into a hug, which catches you off guard. You’re surprised oh makes him giggle. There’s nobody around except for Jay, but it still feels very bold.

“You were amazing.” You squeeze him a little tighter around the waist, and he reciprocates.

“Thank you…I hope you had a good time.”

“I did,” you slowly release him but keep a bit of his shirt clenched in your fist. “What’s your plan for tonight?”

“Hotel tonight…and I think we are leaving in the morning. Unless they change things last minute, which sometimes happens.”

“Well, at least you don’t have to leave right away. It’d be nice if you stayed in Chicago a little longer, though.”

“Yes, it would be nice.” You see him glance at Jay and lower his voice. “I can let you know which hotel, though. And I’ll text you my room number.“

“Oh?” You feel your face getting hot, and Seungmin’s cheeks have definitely turned a shade of pink.

“Unless I have to share the room.”

“Well, you just let know which hotel. And we’ll figure something out if we need to.”

He nods shyly and takes your face in his hands. He doesn’t pull you in for a kiss, though, just gently rubs his thumb over your cheek. And it’s somehow even better.

“I have to go, but I’ll text you.” He disappears with Jay around the corner.

And then you panic a little, because you weren’t ready for a hotel invitation. You’re having flashbacks of the last date, and how heavy things got for just a few minutes. And how Seungmin reacted, because he hasn’t gone that far with anyone yet.

Maybe that isn’t what he was getting at. You’ve spent plenty of time with him alone in your apartment, why would being alone in his hotel be any different?

It’s just a feeling. Just in the way he lowered his voice and blushed. Things will play out how they’re supposed to, though. No pressure. You’d never put him in an uncomfortable situation.

It might be a good idea to prepare anyway.

Going home seems pointless, because the hotel is most likely here in the city. You don’t want to waste time traveling home and then back. You’re already short on time as it is.

But when you find a convenience store to pop into, you get a look at yourself in the mirror. It could be worse, you suppose. It was a hot day, and the concert was no different. Besides, Seungmin has already seen you like this. It can’t be that bad.

But you do buy a water to chug, gum, and when you pass by the condoms, you stare at them for far too long. Buying them means you expect something to happen, and you feel weird about expecting it for some reason. Not buying them and being unprepared seems worse, though.

You grab a pack. You grab two, actually. You did get a quick feel of him before. And you remember it well. Now you just have to deal with the awkwardness of checking out with two different sizes of condoms.

You stuff your purchases between the mess of other things in your bag and walk aimlessly for a few blocks. It’s still crowded down here, even though it’s getting late, and you can’t help but start worrying when almost an hour passes with no text from a Seungmin.

Maybe you should have gone home and waited.

But just as the thought crosses your mind, you get a message.

“Here’s the address, and my room number is 1344.”

Your heart starts to race when you read it. He has his own room, so things will at least be easy. And the address is only another two blocks away.

____

You text him when you get to his room instead of knocking. You’re afraid to make any unnecessary noise. He's shuffling around in the room before the latch clicks and the doorknob turns.

Somehow every time you see him, he’s even better looking.

The door is closed and locked behind you before either of you speak.

“Hi…you got here fast!”

“I was close by. Was I too fast?” You look him up and down. He’s in sweatpants and a black t-shirt, and his hair is a little damp.

“No, definitely not. As long as I don’t look like a wet dog.”

“No, you look very handsome,” you grab a handful of his shirt and pull him toward you. “It’s a good look.”

He leans forward and kisses you on the forehead. Another romantic gesture. It gives you butterflies. You like it, but you can't help but be baffled by his very bold and distinct romantic gestures. Three weeks ago he had a hard time with your hypothetical dating question. But that was three weeks ago.

“Do you want something more comfortable to wear? I can give you one of my shirts.

Okay, so maybe he does want you to spend the night, “Yes, I'd like that.”

He grabs one from his bag and shakes it out. Then he brings it to his face to smell it, “this is clean.”

“Thanks,” you hold it up and look at it.

“It not very big on me, so it should fit okay.”

You head into the bathroom and look at yourself again, try to get the butterflies in your stomach to calm down. Big breath in, slow breath out. It doesn’t seem like he’s trying to drive you crazy, but he’s doing a very good job.

You start taking off your necklaces, your bracelets, and then peel off your shirt that’s long since dried from the sweating you did all day. You check yourself for any offending odors, and even though it’s not bad, you take the time clean up the best you can.

It’s been a while since you had to do a sink bath before a potential lay. And every single one before this wasn’t even worth it. Seungmin is different, though.

Now you wonder if this is the way you want things to go. In a hotel, very little preparation. But you may not see him again for a while after tonight. And if this feels good for him, it's good for you.

There is still the possibility that he won’t be ready.

You slip into his shirt, and it's still pretty big. The sleeves reach your elbows and the bottom hem just covers your shorts. You could walk out without them and he might not even realize it—you take them off and fold them up neatly with your shirt and jewelry, look at yourself one more time, and then head back out to him.

“Oh, that looks good on you,” he turns from his seat at the edge of the bed, then pats his hands on the spot next to him. “Come here.”

As you climb onto the bed and crawl toward him, he slowly lies down on his back. “Are you tired?”

“No, not tired,” he props himself up on his elbow to get a better look at you. “Not yet...it takes a while to relax after a concert." He pulls at the hem of your shirt and his fingers slide across your thigh. He takes his hand away, so you grab it and put it back. Seungmin takes the hint and slides his palm to the side and gently squeezes.

When he looks up at you, you grin, but he just lets himself fall forward so he can hide his face in the blanket. You hear a big sigh, and maybe a soft laugh.

“What’s the matter?” You lie down next to him and wait until he turns his face to yours. “Minnie?”

“Nothing, I’m fine.”

“Do you want to get cozy and watch something?”

“Yes, that sounds nice.”

You pull the blankets down and fluff the pillows while he gathers himself again. “Which side do you prefer?”

“I’m not sure, I don’t usually have to choose.”

“Okay, I’ll take the left side.” You cover yourself up and relax against the pillows.

Seungmin follows, but he stays on top of the blankets for a moment and stares at you. You stare back and say nothing. Then he crawls underneath them, too.

“Don’t worry, I’ll keep my hands to myself.” You say.

He just pushes himself into the pillows and pulls the blanket up to his chin without a word, but he turns himself to face you.

You do the same.

“If that’s what you want.” He says.

You roll your eyes around as if you’re thinking and hmm under your breath. “Can I come closer?”

He nods.

You scoot yourself toward him until you can rest your forehead against his. “That’s better.”

“Can’t watch anything like this.”

“Oh, no I guess not,” you move back a little and look him over. “Should we—“

“No,” he wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you back. “This is good.”

You take the invitation and place your hand on his neck; he moves in for a kiss before you get the chance to, though. And he kisses hard enough to push you on your back.

For a moment you think this might be it, but you find yourself hesitating and softening your kiss. Then loosening the grip on his neck.

He pulls back and stares down at you.

“We don’t have to do anything you don’t wanna do,” you cup his face and hold him there. “There’s no rush.”

“I know.” He comes back down, kisses you once, and then falls back at your side. But his arm remains draped over your stomach.

Your heart sinks a little. It feels like you don’t know what you want. Well, you do know you want him, but you’re nervous. Maybe just as nervous as he is. “Don’t think I don’t want to, because I do.”

Seungmin smiles and sets his head against your shoulder. “I know you do.”

He knows you want him. You’re glad he knows—and you love the way he says it.

“Are you stopping because you’re worried I’m not ready?”

“No, only you know that. I’m just a little nervous, I guess.”

“You’re nervous?”

“I am.”

“You can’t be nervous if I’m nervous.”

He’s right. You take a deep breath and turn to face him again. Kiss him on the lips. Your free hand snakes around his waist, finds the hem of his shirt, and tucks underneath to run over his skin.

His muscles tighten for a second, then slowly relax as your hand moves upward against his side and across his shoulder blade. He sighs as you touch him.

You haven’t felt this much of his body until now.

You keep going, touching his stomach, his chest. It’s then that you feel his hand on you. It’s warm moving across your thigh, over your hip. His touch is soft, but he squeezes when he pulls you closer.

Seungmin slides his hand down to the back of your thigh and brings you as close as he can manage.

He’s on top off you again, hand still on you. His hips are gently pushing into yours. You can feel him through his sweatpants, and now your brain only wants one thing: to get them off of him.

“Seungmin,” you get him to look at you. “Seungmin?”

“Mhm?”

You pull his shirt over his head and toss it aside.

“Yeah?” He kisses your neck and lifts your shirt. “Are you okay?”

You nod and help him get it off.

“Oh,” he laughs and touches the spot directly below your sternum. “Tattoo.”

He looks over you slowly, a little shyly, before placing a kiss on your collarbone. You run a hand across the back of his neck. The other slides down his stomach until it reaches the band of his sweatpants.

Your heart beats wildly in your throat as your hand disappears. Fingers wrap around him and feel every inch. He whimpers softly into your neck. The hand buried in his hair moves down and kneads hard into his shoulder as your fingers stroke him.

Seungmin’s face is still in your neck, breathing hard. Eventually he takes a hand and maneuvers it to pull at his sweatpants. You let go to help slide them down enough to free him.

He moans, a little apprehensively, when you touch him again. You know you have to take it easy; he’s obviously very sensitive and you want this to last as long as possible for him.

“I like hearing you, don’t be shy.”

He tries to hold back an embarrassed laugh, but he does a bad job of it.

“Are you comfortable in this position? I could…do this with you on your back.”

He nods, but you don’t know which part he’s nodding to.

“Lie down.”

You let go of him until he’s on his back and relaxing. His face is still flushed and his breathing is a little shaky, but his eyes are almost closed. He seems relaxed enough. You kiss him and wrap your hand around him again.

His eyes open fully when you begin to stroke him again. His lips part and you slide your tongue against his.

The moans coming from him become a little louder. His hand lightly grips and slides down you arm.

“I didn’t really prepare for this. It could be better…if we had lube.”

“It feels good.” He whispers and smiles into your mouth. “Oh, I do have some.”

“Where?” You slow down a bit and let go of his lips. “I can grab it.”

“It’s…” he laughs sleepily, “it’s in my bag on the chair, in the smaller black bag.”

You climb over him and jump off the bed. The bag is is already open and a few things have been pulled out, but you can see a small black bag on the side. “I found it,” you unzip it and look around.

“It’s in the other little bag inside of that.” He laughs again. “Everyone is very nosy.”

You unzip the second bag, and there it is. It’s small, and still looks pretty full. You turn and look at him, “for when you’re lonely and horny on the road.”

He laughs again. “Yes, exactly.”

You warm a small amount in your hand and push the blanket down a little. You’ve touched him, but you haven’t really looked anywhere besides his lips and eyes yet. Now you watch your hand slowly move up and down , and the warmth and slickness makes everything so much better. You can feel how good it is for him. Your heartbeat drops into your stomach and you can feel yourself getting wetter every time he lets himself moan.

But as wet as you think you might be, his size is still more intimidating than you expected.

“You’re very good at this.”

You don’t think you’ve ever heard his voice so soft.

“Yeah?”

He bites his lips and nods. “It feels so good.”

The room is warm, and the AC hasn't kicked on again. There are a few beads of sweat forming at his temple—you kiss him there and work your way down to his chest, then across his stomach.

The muscles tighten as you move across his hot skin, further and further down. When you slide your tongue across his head, he moans out the breath he’d been holding since you got to his chest. The sound he makes is desperate. He does it again when your lips close around him and your hand grips a little more tightly.

He wasn’t prepared for your mouth. He breathes out your name and it sends a wave of pleasure through you. His hand touches softly across your back and neck.

He says your name again.

“You okay, Minnie?” You kiss his stomach again and look up at him.

He nods and sits up, “can I touch you?”

You let go of him and straddle his stomach. He reaches for you and runs his fingers over the thin fabric. You put your hand over his and push your underwear to the side so he can feel you. There’s another, almost inaudible moan when he does.

Two fingers slip deep inside as you lean in to kiss him, and with your help, he gets the hang of moving inside of you.

You sigh sweetly into his mouth. You’re already much more sensitive than you normally would be. Every little movement he makes is causing just enough friction where you need it. The heel of his palm found your clit and you’re not sure he even realizes.

“I’m gonna come if you keep that up, wait a sec,” you stop his hand and take a deep breath.

“You are?” His voice cracks and he sits up more. His other hand has been digging into your hip, and he finally loosens his grip. There might be a bruise there later.

You grab his face and kiss him hard, then finally maneuver yourself out of your underwear while he’s there to keep you balanced. You reach behind and find his cock, stroke him a few times, and move back.

“Are you good if I…have a seat?” You laugh and wrap your other arm around his shoulder.

“Yes, very good,” he holds onto your waist to help steady you both.

When his head slides across you, he smiles and throws his head back. You do it again before carefully pushing him a little bit inside of you. It doesn’t take much to get another sound out of him.

“There’s a lot more to go,”

He looks drunk, but he smirks, “sorry.”

“For what?”

“For having a lot more to go,” he laughs.

“I’m not complaining.”

You push him deeper, just a little, because you’re not sure what your limit will be in this position.

And deeper. You watch him carefully. His eyes are closed and his mouth is open. You hold him tightly around the neck with both arms before slowly lifting yourself.

It takes a few more times before you find a rhythm , but when you do, you’re sure the sound Seungmin makes reaches the surrounding hotel rooms.

You try to quiet him with your mouth, but it only stifles him a little. You love the noise, but if the others are close enough to hear him, it might makes things awkward.

His hands hold your hips and slowly guide you up and down on his cock. You breath his name into his mouth, and he bites down on your lip.

His voice is a whisper. “Is it okay?”

“Yes,” you whine and push yourself as far down as you can. It stings, just a little, and only for a moment. “You feel so good.”

He leans back to watch himself slide inside of you, and the lusty, satisfied look on his face is making the ride even smoother. “Do I?” He takes your face in his hand and runs his thumb along your lips and cheek.

The room disappears and all that exists is the feeling of him; his breath on your neck, his voice in your ears. His hands grip you tighter, lifting you, and holding you steady when he fills you up again.

He’s not ready for it when you pick up your pace. His fingers dig hard into your hips—you hear him swear under his breath as he attempts to keep himself under control.

“Talk to me, I wanna hear your voice. Do you like it, Minnie?”

Seungmin kisses your neck, his lips graze over your ear, “yes,” he manages through the soft sounds he can’t hold back, “yes, fuck. You feel amazing.”

You pull him away and look at him, arms still wrapped firmly around his neck. One hand slides up and into his hair. “I like you like this.”

“Like what?”

“Under me, lost in it. I thought you were sexy before…but—“

“You think I’m sexy?” His smile is cute and tipsy, voice is airy. If it weren’t for you holding him up, he’d be flat on his back.

All of the sudden, you’re snapped back to reality. Seungmin is there, eyes wide, but the room is back. You’re no longer floating. You lost control and went a little too hard, and it hurt. You make a pained sound and all of your weight is on his shoulders.

“Did I hurt you?” He holds you up and pulls out, and you’re now relieved to be giving your burning thighs a break.

“No, no you didn’t,” You have to kiss him to get rid of the worried look on his face. “That was my fault.”

“We should change positions.”

You lay back on the pillows and grab his waist when he crawls over you. Your legs fall open and rest on either side of him.

“This is a bad angle for you to look at,” he smiles and hides his face in your neck.

You lift his face back up, “is that a joke? You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever had between my legs.”

He whispers a no and hides his face again, but at the same time, his fingertips slide down your thigh as if he’s teasing you.

”Sexiest…” you moan into his ear and wrap your legs around him to bring him closer.

You don’t need to give him any more direction. He explores you briefly with his fingers before guiding himself in the same way you did; slow and gentle.

“I’ll be careful…” he slides in easily in this position, stopping short to make sure he isn’t going too far.

You take his hips and carefully pull him in the rest of the way.

A rough groan jumps out of him when you meet. He stays there and looks at you until you brush the hair from his eyes and speak. “What is it?”

“Nothing,” he smiles, looks down your body, then back up to your face. “Just like looking at you.”

“I’m the one with the view,” you kiss him and shift your hips, getting another sound out of him.

Now he’s finding a rhythm, but he’s much more reserved than you were. He seems to know his own limits, and maybe he’s trying not to overdo it and finish too fast.

“Is this okay?” He nuzzles into your ear and whispers before kissing you just below it.

“Yes,” your hands run up his sides and back, his neck, into his hair, “it’s perfect.”

He thrusts into you, very delicately, a few more times before slowing down. Then he stops completely, still inside of you. He’s breathing hard, eyes closed in concentration.

“Seungmin?”

“I just…need a few seconds.”

“Take your time,” you take his hand in yours and help his thumb find your clit.

He moves it in slow circles and watches you for any direction. But he does very well. He has a light touch, and a good pace. His hands are soft and warm. This, combined with him inside of you, looking down at you with eyes drunk with pleasure trying so hard not to come yet, is making everything happen very fast. But you don’t mind.

When he pulls out halfway and pushes back inside, you whimper and the pleased look on his face pushes you over the edge. He smiles and starts fucking you again, and he doesn't let up—you feel it coming. You moan much louder than you intend. He loves hearing it.

Your back arches up and your legs squeeze around him. It lasts a long time, and he doesn’t stop—just carefully touches you in the right spot until your body finally relaxes

“Wow…did you—”

You nod and try to catch your breath.

He doesn’t get through his question because it’s his turn. He comes hard and fast. The condom was completely forgotten up until this point, and he certainly doesn’t attempt to pull out. You don’t even allow yourself to dwell on it—you just enjoy the moment.

Seungmin’s mouth hangs open, and his eyes water. His moan is different this time; it’s more feral. His whole body tightens and moves in slow motion as his orgasm passes through him. He pumps into you until he can't take it anymore..

Then he’s catching his breath and regaining his composure. He comes down to kiss you, tucks an arm under your neck to bring you closer. He slowly pulls out and puts his weight on his knees.

“Come here…”

He listens and slowly lowers himself next to you. His hair is a little damp from sweat, and his face is pink. It’s a good look for him. You pull the sheet up and over both of you, then wipe at his brow with your thumb.

“That was nice,” he’s still catching his breath. His eyes close and you can see his body soften and relax on the pillows. “That was very nice.”

“Yeah, it was.”

“It was better than nice,” his eyes flutter open and he looks at you. Then he reaches out and pulls until there’s no space left between you. “It was much better than I thought it could be.”

“Wow,” you say into his neck. “That’s quite a compliment.”

“But I’m sorry, it’s probably not great that we didn’t use protection.”

“No, but I’ll take care of it in the morning.”

Someone’s phone buzzes.

“I think that was me,” Seungmin says and reaches behind him. His phone got lost somewhere underneath the blankets. As soon as he glances at the screen, he tosses it behind him again. “Are you going to stay the night?” He asks, arms tight around you again.

“I should get home before my mom starts to worry.”

He nods and tries to hide a pout.

“But you’re leaving in the morning, right?

“I think so, I’m not sure what time.”

“Would it be alright if I spent the night? So we can say goodbye.”

“Yes, that's a much better plan.”

“Can I use the shower?” You wiggle free of his grasp and look at him, “heat, concert, sex…that’s a lot to sleep in.”

Seungmin laughs and nods, “yes, go take a long hot shower.”

____

When you come back to the room, Seungmin is sitting at the desk writing. You can hear soft music playing from his phone. There are fresh clothes laid out on your side of the bed: the shirt you had on very briefly, and a pair of very comfy looking sweatpants.

“Are these for me?” You ask. He’s already cleaned up and redressed.

He closes his book he’s writing in and spins around in the chair, “yes, I’m sure they won’t fit very well, but they’re comfortable.”

“Thank you.” You drop your towel and pick up the shirt.

Seungmin stares at you as you pull it over your head, “what?” You laugh and grab the sweatpants. They are soft and they look expensive.

“Uhm, sorry…I didn’t see you without your bra before.”

You think he might be blushing.

“Oh!” You grab your chest, “I guess you didn’t. Come here.”

“Hm?” He smirks and walks toward you as you lift the shirt back over your head. “Oh…”

You take his hands and he immediately touches you, running his palms, and then his fingertips, over your nipples. They stiffen from his touch. He sits at the edge of the bed and pulls you closer, keeping one hand on your chest. The other runs down your side and over your ass. He squeezes and kisses the spot where your tattoo is.

This could turn into something very quickly, but right now you want nothing more than to get under the covers with him and sleep. You know he needs it.

“I like this,” he pulls at the hem of your shirt when you slip it back on. “You look cute in my clothes.”

____

It’s nice waking up next to him.

The room is still dark because the curtains are pulled shut, but not completely—little bits of sunlight make it in through the sides. You can see his sleeping face, cheek squashed against the pillow, lips slightly parted. He’s curled up tight in his spot with the blanket only covering his lower half, but one bare knee is far up enough to poke out.

His arm is reaching toward you, palm up and fingers curled. You slide your hand over the sheets and gently touch him. His fingers twitch and then close around yours.

He sighs deeply, then opens his eyes. First he looks at his hand holding onto yours, then his eyes move along your arm and up to where you’re laying on your pillow.

“Good morning,” he squeezes your hand and moves himself closer to you. “Did you sleep well?”

You nod and pull his hand up to your lips. “Did you?”

“Mhm, very well.”

“Did I tell you how amazing you were last night?” You ask and fluff his hair, “I mean…” you hide behind a hand, “I’m still asleep.”

“Well, I don’t know about…amazing.”

“The concert I mean!” you hide your face in the pillow, and Seungmin giggles as he tries to get you to look at him.

“I was okay I think.”

“The concert was…and you. I was focused on you the whole time.” You clarify as much as possible through your grin.

“You focused on Seungmin the whole time?”

“Yeah, the best part.

“And last night…last last night.” He smiles wide.

“Also focused on Seungmin.”

He pushes himself closer until his face disappears into your neck. “Thank you.”

A knock echoes through the room. Three heavy knocks. The voice that comes through is soft. “Seungmin, are you up?”

“Oh, it’s Lee Know. Stay here.”

You stay put and pull the covers up over your shoulders, but you turn to face the door. Seungmin opens the locks and pulls it open a few inches.

“What’s wrong? It’s still early.”

“I know, but I thought you might want to get breakfast,” Lee Know puts a palm on his side of the door and pushes, “can I not come in?”

“Uh, you can but…” Seungmin hesitates. “I’m not alone.” He gives in when Lee Know takes several steps into the room. He won’t be able to hide you for much longer.

“Oh,” he looks to the spot on the bed where you’re under a pile of covers. “Is it the girl, the one who was at the soundcheck?”

“Did IN tell you about her?.”

“No, Chan did. I should go. I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to go,” you squeak out. You can just make him out from your spot, and when you pull the covers down from your nose, his whole body comes into view. Then you remember that one of them doesn't speak English very well, and you think it may have been him. You repeat yourself in Korean.

His eyes widen a bit. “Should we all get into bed, then?” He can be sarcastic and dry; you remember Seungmin mentioned that as well.

You sit up and look at him with a smirk on your face. “He’s the boss.” You nod toward Seungmin.

“You’re the boss,” Lee Know looks at Seungmin and winks. “Text me if you want to come.”

Now he turns to you, “nice to meet you,” he smirks and lets himself out.

Seungmin let’s out a long sigh when he’s gone.

“Come back to bed,” you move the blankets from his spot and fluff up his pillow. “Please.”

He listens and crawls back to your side. When he puts an arm around your waist and pulls you close, he says, “I was nervous about you meeting him.”

“Lee Know? Why were you nervous?”

“Am…am nervous, I guess.”

“You don’t think he’d like me?”

“The opposite, actually.” He hides his face in your chest and whines.

You oooh into his ear and it makes him giggle. “Does that tickle?” You move his hair and place a kiss there.

“I think you two are very similar.” Seungmin says. “You remind me of him sometimes, especially when we text.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

“No,” he shakes his head, still shoved into your chest. “But, I just think you’d like him.”

You scoot yourself down until you’re face to face with him, but he still doesn’t lift his gaze. “Hey, look at me.”

He doesn't.

"Minnie?"

This time he listens, but he also gives you his best puppy eyes.

“You think I’ll get to know him and like him more than I like you?”

Seungmin nods.

“And that he’ll steal me away from you?”

He nods again, then stops and shakes his head, "You're not really mine to be stolen away..." he scrunches his face up in thought, wondering if his English made any sense.

“Well, I’m a little flattered you’d think someone else would like me that much. I’m much more flattered you don’t wanna have me stolen away.”

He rubs his eyes and sits himself up on the bed. “I’m sorry, I know we already talked about this.”

“We can talk about it again if you want to.”

He shakes his head and gets back under the covers. His hands find you and start to paw—at your side, your hip. He slides one down your outer thigh, and slowly back up. Then he starts to talk anyway. “He also knows Choonhee very well.”

“Okay, I think I'm understanding. I could have possibly been set up with Lee Know instead of Seungmin?”

You can hear his dramatic whine from underneath the covers. “It is very possible.”

“But I was set up with you for a reason. And you’re the first person I went on a date with since I left home, so I got very lucky.”

“Lucky?”

“Yeah, lucky. Good dates are hard to find.”

Seungmin pokes his head out from the covers and smiles at you. “I’m glad I was a good date.”

"You were a perfect date."

"You should call me Minnie more." He says it's softly, but his hands are in a dangerous spot. "All the time. I like it.

"You were a perfect date, Minnie."

hi again! ~

i'd like to request yandere/obsessive seungmin. it's a concept that's been eating me alive for the past few days!

if this falls outside your comfort zone, please feel free to ignore! ❤️✨

love your blog! okay bye ~ 🥰🫰🏽

Thank you for being so patient! 🤍 This flavor of Seungmin is a first for me, so I definitely spent a lot of time overthinking. Hope you enjoy him!

Yandere!Kim Seungmin/female reader

wc: 5.2k

rating: explicit/18+

contains: manipulation, a little stalking, humiliation/degradation, choking (sexual & non sexual), reader is a little into it. overall typical male yandere things, so please keep that in mind when reading...

. ✦ . ✦ . ✦ . ✦ .

He isn’t taking anymore input on the matter. Seungmin is done, he’s standing, and he’s ready to go. He puts his hands in his pockets and waits impatiently, and you can already see what’s happening between his legs. He’s still soft, but he pulls the front of his sweats tight so you can better see what you’re obviously staring at.

“Come on…it’s all yours, remember?”

. ✦ . ✦ . ✦ . ✦ .

Seungmin watches you closely from his side of the table—arms crossed, legs spread open. You can see the soft flesh of his inner thigh peek out from his shorts, and when he moves, it moves, and staying on your side of the table gets a little more difficult with every passing moment. You hardly know him, and yet...this is tough. It's been four weeks since you met, and that in itself seemed like pure luck.

He looks at you like he has you all figured out.

. ✦ .

He was here, in this cafe, waiting patiently on a date that definitely stood him up. An hour had gone by since he arrived, and you watched him sit there, sipping his coffee, checking his phone...wringing his hands. It was obvious what had happened before you worked up the nerve to go over there, but you did. You abandoned the laptop and the work you'd been mostly ignoring (to look at him), and you cautiously walked closer. Had the cafe been any busier, you might not have, but there was nobody there to see you embarrass yourself except for him.

He smiled at you immediately when he noticed you walking toward him, but he was still surprised when you stopped and stood there, thinking of what to say. Even though you went over it in your head for the last twenty minutes, you were still stuck on an opener.

Seungmin spoke first, in perfect english, and his voice was so soft and pretty. "Hello, are you getting a lot of work done? You look very busy over there."

"Yes," you laughed under your breath, "I'm sorry to bother you—"

He shook his head, "No...not, um...you're not bothering me. I'm not busy," his eyes drop to the napkin he'd been tearing into pieces.

"Are you waiting for someone?"

"I was, but I don't think they're going to show up"

You were right. Stood up. Whoever decided to not show up was missing out on a very pretty face. "Would it be too..." you switched to Korean very briefly, "Can I join you?"

He nodded quickly, and his smile grew a little, "yes, I don't think my date will be interrupting us."

"I'm sorry they didn't show up"

"I was feeling very down, but I think I'm better now...my name is Seungmin."

. ✦ .

Lucky.

He clears his throat and bounces his knee, "what did you wanna talk about?"

"Us"

"Yeah? I like us. We can talk about us.”

Still he sounds so sweet, so smooth.

The shy, well mannered boy at the cafe isn't here, though. Actually, he wasn't even at the cafe. You were both polite and respectful, but he matched your flirting perfectly, and you were both calm and reserved…until you took a walk an hour later and he fucked you in the park.

The sun had just set, and almost everyone had cleared out when you felt his knuckles drag up the back of your arm, and there was no denying it—you wanted it from the moment you laid eyes on him. And you did exactly what you imagined: hung on desperately to his shoulders, gripped his neck, dug your nails into his back as he held your thighs apart and fucked you slowly. You let him fill you up—you watched him slowly pull out, and felt his cum start to leak before getting on your knees and begging him for more. And he gave it to you.

Afterward he walked you home, and you invited him up, because you didn’t want to let him go just yet. There was no more sex, but he kissed you and touched like he already loved you.

“Are you mine?” He whispered into your ear as he kissed and bit at your neck, . “Hm, yeah, you are…I want you.”

“Lucky me. I want you, too.”

--

He leans back even further and stretches his arms over his head. A pale line of his tight stomach peeks out from under his shirt, and you watch it like you haven’t seen it before—haven’t touched it, haven’t tasted every inch of it.

“This was fun, but I’m not sure it’s gonna work”

The fall of his face is so fast, so dramatic. You didn’t think he would be so surprised, to be honest. It’s only been a month, but nearly every day together is enough time to figure out that things just don't fit.

“Not going to work?” He sits up and runs his palms roughly down his thighs, pulls at his shorts. “We work great, and we have fun. I’d like to keep having fun."

Breaking things off is hard because of the fun. The sex is too good, and it’s been blurring your judgement the entire time. Even now, all you can think about is getting on your knees for him, and you feel like today might end with that regardless of what happens. But Seungmin is everywhere; he’s always the first and last notifications on your phone, and it doesn’t stop at all in between. Maybe he means well, but you’re exhausted.

“I like our fun, too. But Seungmin…I need some space. We both need space before we burn this thing out.”

He rubs the back of his neck, and his eyes wander around your apartment. The look on his face is familiar, because it’s the same one that he had before you approached him four weeks ago. Upset, a little confused.

“I can take a break. So…what, no sex for a few days?"

You almost say yes. “I think we need more time than that.” This is you trying to be smart, but you don’t want to be smart, you want to do what you usually do with your relationships; let them run their course even though you know things will get bad, and someone will definitely get hurt. No, you want to be stupid...you want him to fuck you senseless right now.

Seungmin stands and adjusts his shirt over his shoulders, stretches his neck. “Okay…got it.”

Your heart thumps a little more as he approaches.

“You want me to go?”

Eye contact is hard to hold. His stare is so intense, and he’s so handsome...too handsome. The little nod you give him takes so much effort, like his closeness puts some sort of spell on you.

He steps even closer, and gently grabs your wrist. “Okay, I’ll...go…” another step, “can I have a goodbye kiss?”

The smell of his breath and his cologne make you dizzy. Pliable. Seungmin laces his fingers with yours and squeezes, and before you even tell him yes, he’s kissing. He kisses like it could somehow make you change your mind. He pulls back and guides your hand to his hip, “you sure?” hoping you’ll move it to where he really wants it.

But you don’t. You squeeze, though. “Yeah.”

“Don’t make me beg”

“Seungmin…” you start, but you have no idea where you’re going from here.

“Please, I have no problem begging”

You watch your hand slide up and under his shirt, touch his warm skin. His muscles tighten under your touch as you stupidly, mindlessly tuck your fingers beneath the button of his jeans.

His hand closes around the back of your neck, “it’s all yours,” and pulls you close to him, “and you’re mine.”

“No…no,” you pull away and make as much space between you as possible. “You gotta go.”

“I did something wrong, right…what was it?”

Being a little too much isn’t wrong. Seungmin didn’t do anything wrong, not really. The problem is his intensity...his overzealous personality. He watches you're every move when he doesn't think you notice, and he glances at your phone when he sees something pop up. You purposely left it unlocked and unattended at one point, which you still feel shitty about, just to see if he would go through it, and he did. He keeps you away from others when you do manage to go somewhere other than the bedroom—everyone is percieved as a threat, no matter what. A few nights ago you left a club because Seungmin insisted there were too many single looking men there. He was right, but he had nothing to worry about. Seungmin doesn't seem to understand how you see him; he's handsome, and he's funny. Thoughtful, and a little too selfless...especially in the bedroom.

But at the same time, he's suffocating. Jealous, possessive, and obviously terrified of someone stealing you away from him. So, this is hard.

"I'm sorry, Seungmin. I really wish we—"

"Wish? You don't have to wish...you have all the power, right? Let me try...I wish we never met. I wish you never decided to take pity on me, and talk.

You're lost for words, but it doesn't matter...everything you needed to say was said. He grabs his jacket from the chair and heads for the door, but he takes his time putting his shoes on. If he's waiting on more from you; a change of heart, more of an explanation (you didn't really tell him the truth), he won't get it.

He looks back at you once more before opening the door, and he closes it behind him with a slam.

. ✦ .

Two days pass so quietly, and you're surprised. Maybe he figured out what the problem was, the main part of the problem, because you didn't completely lie to him. You are afraid of going hard and burning out, and that is exactly where the two of you were heading.

The office door pops open and your coworker peeks in, "your lunch is here!"

"No, I didn't order lunch"

"Well, it has your name on it, and a note! It says..." she starts to unfold it, but you're up and on her before she can read any of it.

"Okay, okay...lemme have it"

The smell coming from the bag gives you flashbacks to your first real night out with Seungmin. You told him how much you liked the spicy fried chicken he picked for you, and that you couldn't wait to have it again, and of course he remembered. You open the note and read:

잘 먹고 있길 바라 승민

"Dammit, Seungmin." You fold it back up and stick it in your back pocket. This could be his soft approach to communication, but you also wouldn't be surprised if he scheduled your Monday lunch before you broke up with him.

Maybe you should have told him the real issue. You don't believe you can change his unhealthy approach to a relationship, and talking to him about it might even make things worse, but you didn't give him that much of a chance.

The buzzing of your phone snaps you back to reality, and you're not surprised when you see his name. The message throws you a little, though.

who is he?

Who is he? There is nobody else. There wasn't before, or during your few weeks with him, and there is no one now. He thinks you broke things off to be with someone else; seemingly, his biggest fear. So now what do you do? Anwer him and tell him there is no he? Or ignore him and hope he doesn't text again? Or pay you a surprise visit.

Today, you ignore.

Later that night, you stare at the open message thread and think. Instead of typing a reply, you scroll up and read his past text messages:

No, don't be busy tonight...can come over and we can make a mess here for a change

You did go over that night, and the two of you made a mess of his bed, and then the couch. That was the last time you slept with him, and Seungmin whispered I love you over and over as he fucked you raw, over and over. It didn’t seem wrong at the time, because he makes your head fuzzy, but afterward…you’re positive he wanted to tell you again.

Morning! I missed you last night, I miss you right now...don't make me miss you anymore today

Only vaguely threatening in retrospect. But also cute.

I couldn't sleep last night, and I really wanted to call you. Can I do that?

Thoughtful, but needy. Seungmin knows how to balance his cute, his hot, and his…whatever he is—you have to give him that. A new message from him throws the thread back to the bottom, and you read it before you even realize it's there:

I know you're reading this...fucking answer me

. ✦ .

You expect to see him outside of your building when you leave the next morning. And then outside of work. He’s nowhere, and he doesn’t text again—not yet. Answering him is inevitable, but you have to think about your reply.

Home is two more blocks away when you feel the buzz of the notification. Maybe he’s outside the lobby door, waiting patiently. Your heart races when you see him typing again. You're not sure if you're nervous, or excited.

how was work?

I hope you had a good day…

You don’t have to look so nervous

He’s watching. And you're not nervous, because Seungmin doesn't scare you. The watching is a tiny bit unnerving, though.

I can forgive you if there is somebody else. It’s not too late to fix things.

The texts keep coming as you walk, get to the lobby, and finally make it to the elevator. Only then do you look at your phone again.

Get rid of him, come over

Or I’ll come to you

I miss your bed

I miss you

I know you miss me

It feels like a weird dream.

Seungmin, there was nobody else, and there is still nobody else. And yes, I’m here and I’m reading everything you send.

There is nothing to forgive, and nobody to get rid of. I won’t be coming over, and I’m sorry that you miss me.

It’s stupid, and it might make things worse, but you send it anyway. You make a drink and find yourself sitting at the counter, watching and waiting to see his three little dots start to bounce, but it takes longer than you expect. Now you're feeling impatient, and you're not sure why. You want him to reply; you want to know what else is going on his his head, and just as you drain your glass, he starts typing.

I know you miss me. Stop pretending this is what you want. You're acting like a cunt.

That stings a little. He moves quickly between anger and sadness, but he's also somehow getting everything right. You can't deny that you miss him, and you are turturing yourself...but you kind of like how badly he wants you.

I need you so bad

That's the last message he sends, and it’s the one that you dwell on after a few more drinks; after getting into bed and pulling up the photos in your camera roll—selfies you’ve begged for, screenshots from your video calls.

You’re one hundred percent thinking with your cunt right now. Looking at him—he takes the cutest selfies—and remembering how good he makes you feel, and how good you make him feel…not touching yourself is a challenge. You squeeze your thighs together, put some pressure where you need it. You decide you can't give in and get off to this, not tonight, but maybe giving into him wouldn’t be that bad. Besides, Seungmin needs you.

. ✦ .

I'm not going to give you another chance. You have today.

That sounds a little more threatening, but you're not sure if he means it how you're imagining it in your head. What happens after today? You expected to wake up to more than that, but you’re relieved you woke up less horny. The last month with him is enough of an explanation for you, as far as why and how his weird, slightly unhinged texting got you so riled up last night.

But you’re only less horny. And you might text him back over your morning coffee.

Yeah, you definitely will.

What happens after today?

He starts typing immediately, but then he stops. A few seconds later, he starts again. Maybe he didn’t think it through well enough yet. Still, you’re on the edge of your seat.

Do you think I’m going to tell you over the phone? No, I need to see you.

He’s smart, you already know that. He has a big brain, and a big dick, and you thought for a while he might also have a big heart. Or you hoped.

Alone

Alone, of course. No coffee shop talk. But if he’s sentimental enough, he might agree to it.

Why don’t we just meet at our table?

He doesn’t respond quickly. He’s considering it…wondering if it’s isolated enough to get his point across. But you’ve offered to talk to him again, and that’s good enough.

okay…when you’re free

Thoughtful. Luckily, you’ve already called work and told them you needed to take a personal day.

I’ll meet you there in an hour

. ✦ .

You’re late, on purpose. Seungmin is sitting inside at your table, head in his hands, staring into his drink. He looks tired and angry, and you expected a text by now, asking why you aren’t there. As soon as the door opens, he looks for you, and he tries to keep a straight face as you approach.

“You’re late”

“I’m sorry”

There’s already a latte waiting for you on the table—caramel, steamed extra hot.

“…uh, I’m sorry,” he says it so quietly, you barely hear it. “For what I said yesterday.”

“Did you mean it?”

“Yes, I miss you…I do. I can’t think straight knowing you have someone else.”

“You were watching, did you see me with anyone else? And I mean when you called me a cunt.”

Seungmin doesn’t answer, but you assume that is what he’s really apologizing for. He’s fidgeting with his cup, and you see the same version of him that was here the day you met. The same sweet boy you couldn’t resist.

“I miss you, too”

“You do?” He perks up and clenches his drink.

“Yes, but you’re a lot to handle. You were a lot before yesterday.”

“Please, I promise I’ll be better at this. I do love you, I really do.“ He reaches out for your hand, and you let him take it.

“Seungmin, you haven’t known me long enough to even know that”

“Maybe not, but I do. I can prove it to you.”

“What happens after today? What if I leave here…what if I don’t take you home with me?” More silence, but his face changes. It’s not so soft anymore. “I don’t believe you’re going to just disappear.”

“I won’t”

“Why do you want me so much?”

“Why do you deny how much you want me?”

You try not to look too surprised, but you’re pretty certain he can still read you. Instead of answering, you take a long sip of your coffee. Seungmin does the same.

“Thank you for the lunch yesterday”

“I hope it was as good the second time. We should do that again.”

That was the only dinner date you’ve had. Everything else was mostly isolated; here, the park…but mostly sex. Seungmin doesn’t seem like the type for traditional dates, but maybe it’s because you didn’t get all of the fucking out of your system yet—both of you.

“Okay…” you start, but you feel like you’re making a mistake even as the words form and come out of your mouth. “Take me out tonight.”

He smirks. The look on his face is a little condescending, but relieved at the same time. His smile grows until you can see all of his teeth, and his cheeks turn pink. It’s a good look on him. You really hope you’re not making a mistake, because you’d love to look at him like this all the time.

“Six...Seven? We can meet wherever we decide to go.”

Seungmin slowly shakes his head. The smile is still plastered on his face. “At seven? No, no you’re not going anywhere, I’m hungry now. We can get food later.”

His voice drops, and the drop in your stomach feels so good. Your thigh twitches, and the pulse in your clit is too much.

“And your apartment is closer”

He isn’t taking anymore input on the matter. Seungmin is done, he’s standing, and he’s ready to go. He puts his hands in his pockets and waits impatiently, and you can already see what’s happening between his legs. He’s still soft, but he pulls the front of his sweats tight so you can better see what you’re obviously staring at.

“Come on…it’s all yours, remember?”

You nod as you pull your eyes away and look at his face.

“Let me make you feel good,” he takes a step closer and rubs his finger under your chin, “I know you’re already getting nice and wet for me.”

“Yeah,” you sigh as his finger traces over your lips, and you are…you start to ache for him. Your legs shake as you get to your feet, but Seungmin grabs you by the arm and holds you. “Yeah, let’s go.”

The whole walk back, he’s on you, holding tight like he expects you to change your mind and run. But that’s not going to happen. Your head is swimming, and you can only think of what he’s going to do when he gets you alone. You’ve gone this long without sex, but your downtime was still full of dirty texts, photos, telling each other in extensive detail what you wanted to do to each other next time.

His hand slides under your shirt and up your back once you’re in the elevator, and just as it slides back down to grab your ass, the doors open, and you lead him out with his hand still gripping you.

“Take this off,” he pulls your shirt over your head and tosses it on the ground.

“We’re almost there…Seungmin.” You’re spun around and pushed hard against the wall. One hand is on your throat, and the other unbuttons your jeans. “Seungmin—“

He shushes you, kisses you softly, and unzips, “pull them down for me…” You tug at each side until he has enough room to slip his hand between your thighs, and he smiles as he slides his fingers back and forth, collecting as much of you as he can. “Good girl, so wet for me.” He pulls back out and sucks his fingers into his mouth.

“Minnie…my door is right there”

“I know. Take them off.”

The pressure on your throat increases until they drop, and then he rewards you with another kiss. The cool air on your nearly naked body sets goosebumps off all over you, and you shiver. He tugs once at his sweats and you watch his cock slowly appear, and it bounces as he frees it completely. The shine of his pre-cum makes you throb and whimper, and for a moment, you forget where you are.

He grabs your hips and turns you, and now he has you by the back of your neck, cheek against the wall. There’s nothing to hold onto here, and you can’t reach for him, so you set your palms flat against the wall and try to balance yourself. And then his hand is gone. Both of them grab your hips, and his tongue slides over your entrance. He licks, pushes in deeply, and sucks at the arousal pouring out of you until he’s satisfied. Now you're hyper aware of where you are, out in the open…and someone can turn the corner at any moment. Seungmin doesn’t care. You're not sure if you care.

“Fuck me”

“Fuck you, hm? You ready for me?”

“Yes, fuck…please…I need it”

“What do you need, baby? Tell me.” He’s back on his feet, fingernails grazing over your thighs and ass.

“I need your cock, I need it”

His arm wraps lovingly around your waist, and slowly…very slowly, slides deep inside of you. Seungmin groans from the pressure, tight and hot. You clench around him and whine when he pushes in hard, and then he’s back out again.

“No, don’t stop”

The tight squeeze of his hand is on the back of your neck again, “c’mon…get your key…inside. Someone’s gonna see us.” He says it like this whole thing was your idea, kisses across your shoulder as you fumble with the lock, and leads you inside, “go... get into bed.”

Your head is spinning. You’re confused, and ready for him. But the bed…that’s good. That’s exactly where you want to be. You crawl onto the clean blanket and collapse onto your stomach—eyes close as you will your mind to catch up with the rest of you. It’s suddenly very quiet. Seungmin didn’t follow you in, and you don’t hear him outside the door. Maybe he left. Maybe he was just getting back at you—stripping you in public, getting the two of you caught. Embarrassing you, or worse.

Just as you start to believe yourself, the door swings open and he walks in, very casually, open beer in hand, bottle of water tucked under his arm. He smiles sweetly as he looks over your body, because you’re exactly how he wants you, and you’re immediately gone again as he walks closer, cock still hard and bouncing from the tease in the hallway. He runs a hand through his hair, and pushes it back until it stays out of his eyes, but you can’t watch long…his hand is on the back of your neck again, pushing your cheek into the mattress.

“You’ve been so well behaved for me…” he starts, squeezing a little tighter. He straddles the back of your thighs and rubs the head of his cock over you. “And good girls get what they want.”

You can’t talk, but you whimper…moan a little, just so he knows you’re still with him.

His hands run down your back, scratching before he grabs and pulls your hips up to meet his, and you’re filled up with him again. This time he stays in, rolls his hips, and pushes until you whine from the pressure. “Too much, baby?” Seungmin sounds so sweet, so concerned…and he does pull back before he starts to pump into you. Now he whines and speeds up, comes forward, and clenches the sheets as he fucks you. You push back against him, even though it hurts. The bed starts to shake, and the sound your bodies make on contact is almost drowned out by the moans neither of you can hold back anymore.

A Seungmin slips out between your cries, and his pleased little laugh slips out between his. You don’t want to come yet, but you can feel it rising, and you need to touch yourself. As soon as he sees your hand sneak under your stomach, he grabs and pulls both of your arms behind you. Seungmin wants to make you come on his own—no touching—and he will. He adjusts, and he knows he finds the perfect spot when you start to squirm.

“You…first,” he groans.

And you listen again—you come hard and tighten around him, let out a muffled moan into the blanket. You know he lets go by the desperate sound he doesn’t hold back. Seungmin says your name—pleads over and over again as he empties himself inside of you. He loses himself completely.

You’re still as he finishes, and you slowly come down from your high, gasping for air as he pulls out with a heavy, relieved sigh. Seungmin grips and pulls your asscheeks apart, and you know without looking back that he’s savoring what he did—he’s watching his cum slowly drip out. He places his hand over your cunt and gathers it up before pushing two fingers back in.

“Seungmin…” you’re still panting, face down in the blankets, unsure of what to do next.

You wonder what he’ll do next, but you don’t wonder long. His lips begin to trace a line up your back, along your spine. Long, slow, wet kisses every few inches until he reaches your neck—now he moves along your shoulder, and back up to your neck until he’s breathing steadily in your ear.

“Seungmin?”

“Yeah…you alright?”

The weight on your body is suddenly gone, and he comes down next you, looks at you with his usual puppy eyes, and smiles.

He asks again, and his smile falls a little when you just stare at him.

“Uhm…yeah”

Seungmin nods and makes himself comfortable on his side of the bed, stretches his naked body out, and watches you. "Come here," he beckons you with two fingers. Despite what just happened—despite the tousled, sweaty hair, and his spent dick resting on his thigh, the look of innocence on him is so intoxicating. The big eyes, his soft pouty lips, and pink cheeks. Seungmin looks like he just woke up and needs a good morning kiss.

Of course you listen and crawl to him, but your brain is fighting you with every thought, every movement you make. The lust, the hate, the need, they’re all on even playing ground right now.

. ✦ .

The first thing you feel is warm breath against your neck, but it’s not enough to wake you completely. It feels good—this could lull you right back to sleep. Next is a wet kiss. Then a nibble. And then his palm is flat against your throat, and your eyes finally open.

“Min?”

He shushes you and kisses as his fingers close around your neck.

“Don’t, please”

“Okay…okay,” his grip loosens while his thumb runs back and forth beneath your chin. “I love you…you know that? More than anything.” But he doesn’t let go. “I don’t know what I would do without you. Thinking you can just…leave me, like it’s nothing—“

“This isn't easy.” You choose your words carefully.

His voice is shaky, and when you finally look at him, his eyes are red and brimming with tears. “You're breaking my heart. I can’t do this.”

“Do what?”

“Anything.” He squeezes again, just barely. “Everything. That’s what you are…everything." Seungmin’s face is flushed, and a few tears escape him. One, two kisses across your face, and your cheeks are wet with his tears, too, but he finally lets go, and you relax. Maybe he’s right. You don’t have any close friends here…you have nobody. But you do have him.

“Tell me you love me,” he whispers. An arm wraps around your waist and pulls until he can hide his face in your neck. “Please,” he begs.

His scent is intoxicating. The lingering smell of sweat in his hair, and the sweetness of his shampoo are pushed into your nose and mouth. When he’s sweet, he so sweet. He’s comforting. Even now, hours later, he feels warm and comfortable, and exactly what you need. “I do...I love you.”

“Tell me you’ll stay”

You can hear the tightness in his chest, and throat. More tears fall onto your neck, but you hesitate. You’re unraveling again. Seungmin is pulling you apart piece by piece—every sweet word, every aching appeal chips away at you.

“Please,” Seungmin pulls back and kisses your forehead, “I’ll beg all night…I’ll keep you up all night.”

Saying no just means starting this whole thing over again. Saying yes…maybe you can fix this.

“Yeah…I’ll stay”

. ✦ .

Kim Seungmin/female reader

wc: 1.8k

rating: explicit/18+ (contains: jealous reader, Seungmin teasing, f receiving oral, over stimulation)

────────────⭒♡

“Jagiyaaa, come here…what’s the matter?”

You set yourself on the far side of the couch, paying no attention to how your post-shower towel falls around you, “nothing, I’m okay…” and look absently at your phone.

“Why no hug?” He coos.

Of course he has to say it like that. He sits down gently and wraps his fingers around your ankle, “no hello kiss? I missed you.” You look up at him and shake him loose, but he grabs you again and squeezes. “Are you gonna be a little brat?”

The swiftness in the change of his voice makes you heat up, but you decide to stay strong against him, or attempt to. “No.” You grab the towel and tighten it around your chest.

“Then tell me what the problem is, unless you want it forced out of you”

Head still down, you peek at his hand wrapped tight around your ankle. It slides up, very slowly, until it gets to your knee, and he pushes it out of his way.

“I don’t like the silent treatment.” Seungmin moves until he’s settled in the empty space between your legs, “look at me…please,” and forces them open a little more. The phone is swiped from your hands and tossed to the floor, and now you look at him. His eyes are narrowed, his face is serious as he sucks on his lower lip. “That’s better. Now…what did Minnie do?”

You start to open your mouth, but he interrupts…

“And don’t say nothing”

“My phone was pretty quiet the last few days”

Seungmin’s eyes grow big, and he puts on a good, dramatic frown. He lets go of your knee, and then he’s up and gone, and you desperately want him to come back. Instead, he picks up your tossed phone and gently sets it on the coffee table. Back turned to you, he speaks again…

“I’m sorry, I know I was really bad at keeping in touch this time”

This is the first time he’s been bad at it, which is why it feels off. Seungmin is always great at keeping in touch, even when he’s busy. Sometimes you can't keep up with him. Deep down, you know you're being stupid, but you can't stop yourself.

“The last few days were kind of nonstop, and the fansign yesterday went on longer than planned,” he turns and looks at you, and waits for a response, but you don’t give him one yet. “Do you forgive me?”

“Big fansign? Bigger than usual?”

“Maybe a little bigger…not much different than they usually are”

“Lots of hands to hold?”

Seungmin tilts his head to one side, and smirks before slowly making his way back to you, “yes, lots of stays.” He sits again, but this time he leans over you and hovers, an arm on each side of your waist. “Lots of hands to hold.”

You free yourself and push him a little too hard, and he laughs as he hits the back of the couch.

“Come back, sweetie…what’s wrong?” But he doesn’t move. Seungmin sinks into the couch a little more and sighs. The apartment quiets, save for the light sound of music coming from the kitchen. He waits, and waits... but after a few minutes, impatience sets in. “Please come back so I can hold your hand.”

The bedroom door opens, “I don’t wanna hold your hand," and then slams behind you as you head for the kitchen.

“Why did you put clothes on?”

“So I can make you lunch”

“You don’t have to make me anything…get over here”

When you ignore him again, he gets to his feet, and you watch from the corner of your eye as he gets closer and closer. His hand clamps down on your elbow, and you’re spun so suddenly, you get no chance to resist. You stare at him, wide-eyed.

“I want my kiss”

“Okay...then take it”

As soon as the words leave your mouth, you realize what you've done. His lip twitches into a little smirk, his eyes narrow and darken, and the bubbly music surrounding him is such a contrast...you have to smirk, too.

He doesn’t take his kiss. Seungmin grabs your waist, pulls you close, and throws you over his shoulder. “If you’re gonna act like a brat, I’ll treat you like a brat.”

"Put me down...Seungmin...dammit." You try to kick your legs against him, but he has you gripped tight around the back of your knees. You plant a loud slap across his back. It doesn’t faze him—he keeps walking casually toward the bedroom, hitches you up a little as he pushes the door open, and a few seconds later, drops you on the bed. You mumble to yourself…

“Hmm?” Seungmin’s hands go right to his waistband, and instead of tugging at them, he slides one hand in and runs it roughly over his dick. “Take your clothes off,” he snaps, but smiles as you finally do something he says. “You know what I was thinking about all day yesterday?”

You’re sure you can guess, but you know he’s going to show you.

He climbs onto the bed, and places a few warm-up kisses on your thigh before his face disappears between them, and your mind numbs to everything but the sudden heat of his mouth. He moans into you, satisfied. You whine as his tongue slips inside, moves in and out, every curve of his mouth and chin and nose work you perfectly—Seungmin does this so often and so well, he could do it in his sleep…he could do it completely wasted, and he has.

Your thighs are squeezed painfully tight as he spreads you further apart and makes more room for himself, but he can never get enough. He slows down, though, and you grab a fistful of hair as he looks up and licks his lips. You’re all over him, shiny and wet.

“Why you stopping?”

He lets go of your thighs, you release the fistful of hair, and he rolls onto his back, “get on.”

Before you move, your eyes travel to his dick pressing hard against his sweats, and he shakes his head. “Not for you, not yet. On.” But he does free himself, and he does slowly stroke as you get to your knees. “Turn,” he spins his finger in the air, “you can watch.”

Seungmin’s voice is so calm and sweet as he gives his orders, and you can hear him mumble happily to himself as you straddle his mouth. He doesn’t complain when you run your hands across his stomach and chest, but you don’t dare go any further.

It’s hard, watching him touch and stroke himself…bending down and getting a taste would be so easy from here. He dives in, and you moan. His hips jump up and tease you even more—the slow, careful strokes are hypnotizing.

“Let me get you wet,” you whine and grind hard onto his mouth. “Please.” The temptation is getting to be too much, and maybe he won’t really punish you for it. This is fun for him, but he’s going to want to fuck you after he makes you come. You grind a little harder, and you can feel the faint stubble on his chin against your clit. That, and his soft, warm lips sucking you dry; his tongue pushing in and out, back and forth, is going to make this quick. You bend all the way forward and set your lips on his stomach, and his hips twitch. You roll yours hard into him, grind until you feel your orgasm rising. Seungmin releases himself and both hands grip and knead your thighs as you come hard—you forget you could suffocate him for a moment and put all of your weight down as you ride it out, but he keeps squeezing, and licking, and moaning with you.

Another one starts to build, and you let him know with a hard roll of your hips, even though he has no intention of stopping. He lifts you off of him, very briefly—you hear him pull in a shaky breath, and see his chest rise as he fills his lungs with air—and then you’re back on him, grinding against the subtle, deliberate movements of his mouth and tongue. The second one is so close, but Seungmin makes sure to take his time and enjoy himself. His mouth closes around your clit and teases, stops and starts, kisses gently when he thinks you're getting too close. The noises you make speak volumes to him.

"Minnie...Minnie..." you push yourself against his tongue in a desperate attempt for more friction, but he lifts you up just enough to stop you.

"...please let me”

As soon as you say please, he pulls you back down and finishes what he started, holding your thighs still as they shake, but letting all of your weight fall on him again. And he keeps going.

“Baby, okay,” you pant and struggle to hold yourself up, “okay.” Nails digging into his arm eventually gets to him—you crawl away and free yourself from his grip.

“Get your ass back here,” he grabs your leg as soon as you turn and hit the bed, and holds you still, “I’m not done with you yet,” then pulls, and he pounces, and this time, he slips two fingers inside.

“Minnie please." You gasp from the pressure, and his innocent giggle sends a new wave of pleasure through your body. But his mouth returns and forces more out of you. Teeth graze your clit, and a shiver runs up and down your spine. Seungmin bites down gently and laughs again when you whimper...pull at his hair...give in and push your hips into him. As soon as you let yourself relax, you come again, and it’s somehow even more intense than the first.

“Gonna tell me?” He grabs a thigh again and squeezes, puts all of his weight down. All you can manage is a little wiggle of your hips when he bends down and licks. “Be a good girl, tell me exactly what’s bothering you.”

You speak up before he starts again. “Did they hold your phone hostage, or…did you find someone more interesting to talk to?” It comes out staggered as you catch your breath.

“Mmm, so jealous. C’mon, you know me better than that...you know what I always want when I come home.”

As if you need another hint, he comes down and licks again. Your hips twitch—you’re swollen, and sore, and sensitive, but you know he’ll make you come again if he chooses to.

“You think there was someone I wanted more?” Seungmin’s voice is still husky, and a little demanding, but his soft side is beginning to break through. “Hm?” He takes his cock in his hand and gets more comfortable between your thighs.

“No…” You squeeze your legs around his hips and pull him closer. “No…I’m sorry—"

Seungmin shakes his head and smiles wide, “I kinda like it when you’re jealous.”

⭒♡

𝐵𝓁𝒾𝓃𝒹 𝒟𝒶𝓉𝑒 𝒫𝒶𝓇𝓉 𝟧

Kim Seungmin/Female Reader

wc: 7.4k

rating: fluff/light angst/mature/explicit ಇ (contains: f/m receiving oral, pet names, Seungmin being sad)

comments: Blind Date part 5! Wish I could’ve thought of a better title. This is separated into pieces by month. All of the oneshots in my masterlist happened after these events. And since I tried following a strict timeline for the entire series (part 1 started in sept 2021), we are now in Feb 2023, the morning after Last Date.

⠂⠄⠄⠂⋆ ⠁⠂⠄⋆ ⠂ ⠂⠄⠄⠂⋆☽

February

The next morning you wake up warm and too well rested. You never wake up like this. There was no blaring alarm at 6:45, and no noisy upstairs neighbor while you tried to get to sleep.

No, none of that happened. You’re not there anymore. You breathe in the brand new scent of a brand new bed and finally focus your eyes on the spot in front of you. It’s empty, but you can tell he was there. The pillow isn’t fluffed, and if he tried to fix the blanket, you messed it up again in your sleep. He was here, though. And he’s still here. You can hear him right outside the door, walking down the little hallway.

And then it’s quiet when he reaches the kitchen.

You search for your phone and find it tucked beneath his pillow—10am. Seungmin sent a text twenty minutes ago…

good morning ☀️🤍

He’s too sweet to come force you out of bed on your first morning here.

One long shower later, you wrap yourself in the sweatshirt he left folded at the foot of the bed. You’re not sure if he left it there for you, but you’re taking it anyway…at least for now. And just as you walk for the door, you hear him again.

He’s humming something.

Now you remember what you were talking about right before you drifted off to sleep last night. You listen carefully as you get closer, and he gets louder, but then he hears you and stops for a second, starts again, and smiles at you.

“Morning,” you wrap your arms around him from behind and squeeze. “How long have you been up?”

Seungmin spins himself and hugs you back, “not long…maybe an hour.”

“What was that you were humming?”

“Oh…uh, it’s called Wish. I can sing it, if you’d like.”

He remembered. Maybe not until just now, but you’re glad that he did. As soon as you nod at him, he smiles and hums again—and very slowly, he starts to sing. You can tell he’s hiding himself a little, busying his hands with the coffee grinder and not making eye contact. He’s being shy, so you decide not to watch him too closely.

First, you walk toward one of the windows and pull the blinds back a little. Winter sunlight pours in and lights up the room. Seungmin looks back to see what you’re doing. You catch him and smile, and he smiles back. Then you open one of the moving boxes. This one goes to the kitchen, and you notice now that Seungmin has already emptied one of them. He specifically found the one with the coffee maker, the coffee, and everything that goes with it.

You sit on the arm of the couch and watch. He doesn’t realize it for a while, so you get to watch him work.

First he plugs in the grinder—he must have waited to do this part so he didn’t wake you, but he still waits while he sings. He pours in the beans and closes it, but doesn’t turn it on. Next he fills the coffee maker with water. He fumbles with it a little, so you wonder if he typically uses something a little more fancy.

The grinder turns on, and he looks back at you, and he stares for the few seconds it takes to finish and stop itself. Smiles. Turns and goes back to his task. Pops in a filter, pours in the coffee, turns it on.

“Thank you”

“For what?” He closes the distance between you and tucks himself between your open legs.

“Getting the coffee out, and making it. And singing for me.”

He leans in and kisses your forehead, “that’s my job. I’m going to get you a Nespresso machine, though.”

“You don’t have to do that.”

“I may have ordered it already.”

You pull him closer and push your face into his chest, “are they wondering where you are?”

“Probably. Not curious enough to ask, though. Or text.”

“Are you worried about it at all? Should I not be as worried as I am?”

Seungmin stands you up and holds you tight against him. Rubs your back, kisses your ear and works his way down to your neck. “You don’t have anything to worry about. But maybe this is why you had trouble sleeping.”

“Yeah, but I…I’ll try not to worry. I have you, that’s all that matters.”

“You have me. And we will have each other all day…what would you like to do?”

What would you like to do? There isn’t much the two of you can do—you have to stay inside, away from people and prying eyes, because if anything ruins this, you’ll have nobody again. You won’t have Seungmin.

But you’re perfectly satisfied spending the day with him here, looking at him, talking to him, touching and kissing him. Doing nothing. He already has the coffee going, so you’ll make breakfast and sit on the couch with him nestled between your legs. Maybe you’ll find something to watch together. Or you’ll just watch him play one of his games. He can tell you all about the last few weeks—the weeks that you’ve seen in so many photos and videos; ones that don’t tell the whole story.

“Nothing”

“Nothing?”

“I just wanna be here with you. What are you hungry for?”

“Hungry for? Hmm…” he grabs your hand, does a cute little spin—you watch his hair bounce up when he shakes it out of his face—and he sits on the couch. “What am I hungry for?”

The feeling of falling hits before you realize his hands are on you, and you do fall, very neatly into his lap. One arm squeezes you around the middle, and the other hand pulls at the collar of your shirt. The fabric is in the way of the kisses he traces along your shoulder, but he manages well. And he gives you goosebumps. You can feel every hair stand up, and the shiver that runs through you feels so loud in the quiet room.

“Min,” your lips tremble, “Minnie?”

“Yes love, is this okay?” Your knee is pulled back and your legs spread across his lap. But he doesn’t touch. His fingers knead gently into your soft inner thigh, slowly moving up, and then down.

You relax against his chest and nod.

“I’ve missed you,” his hand jumps up to your arm and does the same, “touching you…the way you touch me. I didn’t realize how much until after I left last month.” He sighs and pulls you, turns you on his lap until you’re chest to chest and straddling him. “You weren’t there. And I left you alone, and I felt…guilty.”

“No, don’t ever think that. I don’t want you to feel that way.”

“I know. I thought about it before, too. Before everything, after everything. And what would happen if things, you know, got serious.”

“We knew it would be like this, Minnie.”

“We did, I know.” Seungmin’s mouth twists and he sets his head back against the couch. “I was so worried about how you would deal with everything, I forgot about myself.”

“Oh, Seungmin…I thought about it.” You adjust yourself, sit up a little on his lap. “You always act so stoic, so I wasn’t sure if I should even worry. You’re tough to read sometimes.”

“I am, I’m sorry.” He looks at you again, eyes still glossy and big.

“No, I like trying to figure you out,” your fingers graze over his ears, tuck the loose hair behind them. They’re warm and pink like the flush of his cheeks. “I get a little more every time.”

“Not enough to scare you away yet?”

“Not even close”

The kiss you lean in for is so eagerly returned, you almost lose your balance. But Seungmin takes you by the waist and holds you tight.

“You sure?”

You yes into his mouth and push your tongue in. The coffee maker beeps loudly from the kitchen, but it doesn’t distract. Seungmin pulls you closer and grips your thighs, hard. It feels good. He pushes down until you’re on him—and his dick, still mostly soft, is growing against you.

His heart is racing. You can feel it when your hands move over his back, and you pull away to give him a moment to breathe.

He lays back and looks at you, and then looks down at where your hips meet. There’s a smile forming on his lips, but he’s biting them and making them even more swollen and red. You can’t read him, of course.

“Hey, look at me.” You touch under his chin with your knuckle until he lifts his gaze. His eyes give him away—he looks sad, but you don’t think he is. Worried, maybe. Hopefully not worried about some part of him you don’t know yet, and it being a part you won’t like.

“Hi,” he closes his eyes and lets the smile take over. Eventually his shiny, braceless teeth appear, and he relaxes. Sighs. Squeezes his fingers into your hips.

You lean down and kiss his jaw, and you can’t help but suck a little when you get to where his pulse is still beating wildly. Leaving a mark sounds…appropriate. He can cover it, of course, but knowing it will be there, and that you put it there—why not? You suck until you can nibble on the skin, until he makes a sound and moves his hips.

“That’s a little naughty,” it comes out like a laugh and a moan and a feeble attempt at a protest all at once. “Now they might get curious.”

It is. It’s a bit bold. You pull away and move to a new spot. “Are you good with your concealer?“

“I’m sure I can figure it out.” He laughs and his throat jumps under your lips. “Can I request?”

“Of course, what would you like?”

First his shirt comes off, and he grabs the back of your neck, gently guides you further down, then stops when your lips graze his nipple. You look up and his hand is covering his eyes and he can’t contain his smile.

You run your tongue over him, hard; kiss and suck him into your mouth as loudly and dramatically as possible. Then you move to the other side and do the same.

He’s red in the face.

“Don’t be shy, Min”

Seungmin looks down at you and squeezes your neck. And he whimpers when you do it all over again.

“…puppy”

His hips jump up into yours, “hmm…did you call me puppy?”

“Yeah, your eyes when you look at me like that,” you glance at the red mark forming on his neck, “puppy eyes,” you move to it again and kiss while your thumb circles his hard nipple, “my sweet pup…does it feel good?”

It does, and you know it. You can feel it in his little movements—his thighs shaking beneath you and his quick deep breaths. His eyes glaze over and he sinks into the couch as the blood rushes to his dick. And his sounds, so needy, coming from deep in his chest. But they’re soft. He breathes them right into your mouth when he grabs you for a kiss.

The time you’re apart from him is filled with cute texts and selfies, late night phone calls, Seungmin’s stories he tells you in a hushed voice in his hotel room—because the last few nights he has had to share the space. It makes up, to some extent, for when he’s not here and you can’t talk until one of you falls asleep; when you can’t make coffee and stare at him across the table the next morning.

When you finally come together, this is what will happen. You miss his touch, and (now you know how much) he misses yours. He’s shy about asking for new things, and all you want to do is give him exactly what he wants.

Your hands slide down his stomach, grab at the waistband of his sweats, and when your fingers graze over the hard tip of his cock, he groans.

“Yeah,” he finally answers when you pull away, “…so good.”

“Any other requests?” You dip down again and kiss across his chest, over his stiff, sensitive nipples.

"Uhmm…uh," he’s smiling and licking at the corner of his mouth—thinking. His brain seems to work a little better once you stop kissing.

“Mmm, yeah…maybe”

“Tell me”

Before he can get another word out, his phone buzzes. And then again. A few seconds later, it buzzes one more time. It sits there on the counter just a few feet away, innocent, but not really. You hate his phone when he’s here with you, because any notification could mean he’ll be on his way out.

He’s still looking at you when you pull your eyes away from it.

“I can grab it for you”

“I don’t want it”

“No?”

He shakes his head, “I want…mmm, I want you—” he pauses for a few seconds. One hand hangs from his neck, the other is kneading into your thigh, “to lie on your back.”

One more kiss, then you lift yourself from his lap, and do what he says. You make yourself comfortable; one leg hangs off the side, and the other slides down until the sole of your foot can rub his thigh. Seungmin doesn’t move yet, just sets his head back and looks at you…looks at you like he’s still a little unsure, and a little bit hungry.

As soon as he moves, your heart races and your legs start to shake. He turns himself and closes a hand around your ankle, and he holds tight before he slides his palm up your shin and to your knee. It’s forced back against the couch, and he puts himself right between your legs.

His lips are warm and wet on your thigh, but the hem of your shorts gets in the way, and he stops to grab them by the waist band.

“Minnie…”

He looks at you as he pulls them from your hips, and you watch his gaze move down.

“Min”

The air is cool against you, and you open your legs further without realizing it. Seungmin’s lips hit your other thigh and kiss, moving closer and closer…

You gently grab a handful of hair and tug until he looks at you, “Seungmin.”

“Yes?” His hand is so close to touching you, and his mouth isn’t much further away.

“You haven’t tried this yet…are you sure?”

“Mhm…yeah”

Maybe he’s a little clueless about what he’s doing down there, but his mouth closing around you, the temperature change, and his tongue sliding innocently over your swollen clit does what it needs to do. You move your elbows from under you and let your back hit the cushions.

He sucks hard, and the sound he makes when he releases you is so loud and dirty and satisfying, the little laugh you can’t contain turns into a sigh.

“You can tell me what I’m doing wrong.” You look down at him again, and he looks up, pokes his tongue out to lick his lips, “and what feels good.”

“That felt good”

He does it again, and then his tongue slides into your folds, and it’s not much, but it feels perfect. Every part of you is so sensitive, and the thought of him down there is really all it takes to set your nerves on fire. You roll your hips into him, and he pushes his mouth harder into you, moves it side to side, tongues your clit so delicately that you spread yourself open even more.

“Seungmin,” it comes out like a delirious giggle, it makes him laugh, and his mouth vibrates. You stutter when you start up again, “did you…ah…ooh.”

“Did I what?”

You don’t answer right away, because he doesn’t stop. He’s sucking again—his fingers circle your opening, you can feel how wet you are against them, and you desperately want him to slide them in, but he only teases.

“Did you research?” It comes out like a laugh and a moan, because he’s doing something very right down there. He’s a little erratic and his touch is light and careful, but it’s driving you crazy. It feels good.

“Maybe,” he smiles and kisses. “Am I doing okay?”

“Yeah, you are…don’t be shy, though. You don’t have to be so gentle.”

“Am I being too gentle?”

Seungmin is always gentle. It’s the only way he knows how to be. Even now, he’s staring up at you with his cheek nuzzled against your thigh. He’s been so careful with you every time you’ve been intimate, and you can’t wait to get him out of his shell.

“Mhm, but I like it,” you run your fingers through his hair and scratch, and he groans. "Keep doing what you think I'll like.''

One long hard lick from your opening to your clit, and then he’s back on you. He kisses back down and pushes his tongue in deep, lapping up every bit of arousal that he can. He moans and pulls you by the hips, and you wonder if he can even take a breath.

“Minnie,” you purr and squeeze his hand, and he grabs back to lace his fingers with yours, “aah yeah that’s so good…fuck.”

He keeps going, and his thumb slides over your clit and sparks go off behind your eyes.

The sound you make for him is so needy—you weren’t ready for how he was going to make you feel, but it’s just him. His touch and his sounds and his eagerness. It’s as if that year of built up frustration…that year of waiting for him, pours out of you every time he gets close. And it feels so good.

“Make me come”

His drawn out, dramatic mmmm sends a shiver through your thighs and up your spine. He’s working hard, and he’s so focused; two fingers reach deep inside of you, and the tip of his tongue moves softly. His lips close tight and suck. You’re overwhelmed with his touch now, and you need the slow rise of your orgasm to last forever.

But Seungmin gives it to you, and your moan echoes so loudly off the bare walls of the empty apartment.

His lips stay put, but his fingers slip out and move up until they reach his mouth. You can feel the heat from his tongue as it slips out to run over them

“Hey…” you nudge him with your leg, but he doesn’t move, doesn’t respond. “Seungmin, you okay down there?”

“Mhmm.” He’s there so suddenly, hovering, looking down at you with lusty eyes—even more hungry than they were before. “I am very okay”

“You work too hard, you know that?”

“Do I? I guess I should relax more while I’m here.”

Your legs catch and pull him down until you can grab for his waist. “Yeah, I wanna take care of you,” you kiss him once, “sit down…”

There’s something about the way he listens and obeys without question, and the way he looks at you when he does it. You like that look.

“Lay back and get comfortable. Do you want some coffee while I suck your dick?” You touch him, just to get a rise.

“Do I…uuh, do I want—“

“Iced?”

“Iced is good”

You watch him carefully when you get to the kitchen. His back is to you, but you can see his face when he does finally get comfortable against the pillow.

The clink of ice on glass brings him back from his daydream. He keeps his eyes closed, though, because the sun is a little too bright coming in now, but it doesn’t last—a few seconds later he hears the blinds being pulled closed, and now it’s dark.

One eye opens when he feels you climb back onto the couch, coffee in hand. The bittersweet smell hits him when you set the straw to his lips, and he takes a long, slow slip. Now he opens his eyes and grins at you.

“Is it good?”

Seungmin nods and grabs your sweatshirt when you reach over him to set it down.

This is new for him, too. You’ve done it before, very briefly during your first time together, and he remembers it very well, but you’ve never gotten yourself comfortable between his legs like this.

His head falls back when you touch. It’s just the palm of your hand moving softly up and down, and there’s still fabric separating you, but it feels so good. And he does relax, just like you want him to.

Your voice rings in his ears (“gotta get you hard again, love”). He still feels a little drunk from eating you out and making you come, because he wasn’t sure he could. And he thought he was going to come, too, but he somehow controlled himself. Now he’s softened up a bit—but just seeing you here, pulling at his shorts, stroking, leaning down to kiss and lick—he’s growing in your hand.

The warmth of your mouth warms his entire body. You pull every inch of him in, and when his head hits the back of your throat, he whines and bucks up.

“Sorry…sorry”

The feeling of your lips pulling up and off of him makes him do it again.

“It’s okay, you might not fit in a few seconds.”

“No?”

“Just wanted to go for it while I had the chance.”

“Are you still going to try?”

He can feel the hard pulse of blood rushing to where your hand is gripped tight, the other palm is gently cupping his balls, caressing them, “oh yeah, I’m gonna try,” and then your mouth is on them.

“Ah…that—" he sighs and lays back even more, trying not to disturb you while you work. The warm wet licks across his skin—Seungmin didn’t know he was that sensitive there, and that it would feel so intense, “wow.”

He hears and feels you giggle.

At the same time he’s trying not feel so self conscious. Maybe you felt the same when he had his face between your legs, but all Seungmin could think about down there was making you come, how horny your taste made him, how wet he was making you.

Now you’ve switched places, and he should know better anyway. His mind, heavy with pleasure as you explore him, still skips back to all of your previous times together—your first kiss, sweet and surprisingly intense. Seungmin wasn’t ready for it, and he wasn’t ready for the hard-on he tried, with great difficulty, to hide and calm down. Somehow, you did not notice. Or you didn’t say anything. And then you kissed him again, and again, and he never told you that was the first time someone really kissed him and meant it.

aah…mmm his hips buck again when you run your tongue up his shaft.

You’re taking your time with him, and he thinks you might be doing this more for your own pleasure than his. And that makes it even better.

The second date, when he somehow found the courage to kiss you himself—more than kiss you…he pulled you right on top of him. And then your hand found his erection, and he hoped for a moment, before he got nervous, that this would be his first time. He liked the idea of it being with you, even though you didn’t know each other well. But you liked him, and you didn’t hide it. You were exactly what he needed.

As soon as he scared you off, he so badly craved your touch again; your fingers running down what you obviously wanted.

“Minnie?”

He hears you, and he smiles at you, but it takes him a second to reply, “yeah…aegi.”

“You’re quiet, are you okay?”

“Perfect...don’t stop, you feel so good,” he sighs and reaches for your hand.

You grab his and slowly work him into your mouth, further and further back. The warm, wet feeling is familiar…but watching you swallow him and gaze up at him, it’s so much better in the moment. Seungmin whines when you suck hard and pull back, and bucks up when you push back in.

This time you take all of him, and when he feels the tight squeeze of your throat, he groans and grips your hand in a desperate attempt to keep his hips still. Now his mind is blank and buzzing, and all he can comprehend is you, and the hot radiating pleasure moving through his body.

In and out, so perfectly timed, his head is pushed down your throat—the tight stroke of your hand, your palm and fingers delicately massaging his balls. He could scream. His free hand fists the pillow under him, and he lets himself moan so loudly. He has to, otherwise he’ll lose control, push himself deeper and choke you.

You push him in even more, and now your lips are flush against his skin.

Every last inch is in your mouth, down your throat. It’s such a pretty sight. Your eyes water, and you hold onto his hips as you carefully, slowly pull him out. You leave a mess of spit, and your face is pink when you breathe in deep and cough, but you’re back to stroking him as you catch your breath.

Seungmin wipes at your lips with his thumb, and the look he gives you is full of worry, and concern. He doesn’t want you pushing yourself for him.

“I’m okay, Min”

“Are you…” his breath catches when you close your mouth over his head and lick, “…sure? Mm, yeah you’re good…fuck. Right there.”

“You like it like this?”

Your tongue circles his head, over and over, and he rolls his hips upward when it slides hard over his tip.

“Yeah just like that”

Seungmin lets himself relax again—back against the pillow, neck arching delicately over the arm of the couch. If you could see him like this, you’d tell him he looked like a painting; a statue, something too pretty to not be preserved. He stares up at the ceiling and lets himself get lost in the moment. His head swims. All he feels is you—the steady, hard stroke of your hand, and the pressure of your tongue on every perfectly sensitive nerve.

When he finally lifts his gaze to peek at you, you immediately look back, and your eyes lock. Neither of you seem to want to look away first, so Seungmin doesn’t. And you don’t. If anything, your stare intensifies as your hand and mouth work harder on him.

“Should I warn you?” he asks, and a shy laugh follows. “When I—“

You nod and pull him in again, not completely, but enough…a mouthful.

Seungmin is still holding out, but he can’t do it much longer, especially now that he’s looking down at you and watching every movement you make. It’s an overwhelming feeling.

The last time the two of you had sex, it was so intimate, and it was slow, and he almost doubted you for the briefest moment beforehand. But then you told him you loved him, and he was so relieved you stopped his mouth from saying anything stupid in that moment. Or not saying anything at all, because he just can’t get the words out even if he feels it.

But he is thinking and feeling it now as he watches you. And he feels himself getting there, and he can’t hold it back any longer.

“I’m gonna come…I’m gonna come”

He lets go and you hold him tight, work your mouth gently up and down as he empties himself for you—swallow, lighten your touch, kiss across his head. His hips relax again, and you move your mouth to the softest part of his thigh.

He just watches you kiss up his hip and stomach, and he wonders how long you’ll take to get to his lips, because that’s where he wants you. Until you get to his nipple. Now Seungmin hopes you’ll stay there a little longer, and you do. He’s even more sensitive than he was before, and you feel the goosebumps that jump up all over him.

“Now what?” he asks just as press your lips to his.

“We eat lunch. I’m so hungry.”

｡˚☽˚｡⋆

Every hour you get with him is special, and you take care to remember that whenever he’s here with you. This time it was four. Four perfect hours. Seungmin continued to ignore his phone when, eventually, you both got yourselves off of the couch.

He made you coffee, and he finished the one you made for him.

You ordered and ate lunch, helped him do his laundry and playfully scrutinized his folding techniques. And then you helped him pack.

It’s in the middle of this that he finally checks his notifications, and he takes his time doing it. You watch closely as his eyes move up and down the screen, and then he types and waits for another message to come through.

“Did you get everything you need?”

You just need to break the silence. There’s not much here that belongs to him...not yet at least.

Seungmin leans in to kiss your cheek, “yeah, I think so. My ride is on the way.”

“Oh…we should get you zipped up and ready to go.”

“We should?”

“No,” you stand and hold your hands out for him. “Maybe.”

His phone buzzes in his pocket as you head for the front door. He doesn’t check it—instead he drops his bag and works on getting into his shoes. “I think he’s here,” he checks after a second buzz, picks up his bag again, then sets it back down when he looks at you, “come here.”

You’re already halfway to him when he says it, and you squeeze the air out of his lungs

“Be safe, and don’t forget about me”

“Forget about you? I won’t if you remember to text me all day.”

“I don’t wanna bother you too much”

“I better have a text waiting for me every night when I get off the stage…no, a voice message. Both.” His hands rub in big circles over your back and shoulders.

Another buzz from his pocket.

His arms slip away, but he goes in for a kiss, and Seungmin lets you hold him there for as long as you want. You grab his hand and hold it as he unlatches the locks, squeeze tighter when he turns the knob and clicks the door free.

“I’ll see you soon”

“Seungmin?”

You stare at him, and one by one your fingers begin to unhook until only your middle fingers remain. The words just don’t want to come out. Even as you repeat them over in your head, when you open your mouth, it’s only air.

His other hand tickles beneath your chin, almost like he's coaxing it out of you. "You alright?"

"Yeah”

“Yeah?”

“I love you”

His mouth opens, but nothing comes out. A blush rises up his neck, and you can see his vein jump. But he still doesn’t say anything.

“I…uhm-“

Seungmin pulls you against him, and his hands are all over you again, moving gently over your back, down, until one sneaks under your shirt. He presses his warm palm against your skin and keeps it there.

“—I miss you already”

Still no reply, just a soft, sweet laugh against your ear. He pulls back and places a wet kiss on your forehead, then his bag is over his shoulder and his hand is on the doorknob again.

“I’ll call you as soon as we land, I promise”

｡˚☽˚｡⋆

March

｡˚☽˚｡⋆

May

“I know you’ve been busy, you don’t have to explain yourself,” you can barely hear him grumbling, “and don’t apologize.”

“Please”

Both of you are silent, but there’s still commotion on Seungmin’s end. Endless voices, an intercom, kids screaming. He’s at an airport somewhere.

“Okay, you can do it once. Only once.”

“I’m sorry I’m sorry…I won’t see you for a few more days.”

“It’s alright, Minnie. I’ll be at work, I’ll have plenty to keep me busy, I promise.”

“I’ll make it up to you, somehow. Is there anything I can bring home for you? I’ll find you something anyway.”

“No, I don’t need anything. Just you and your dirty laundry.”

Seungmin laughs, and that’s enough of a gift. You hear one of the others teasing him, but you can’t tell who it is, and he laughs again, tells them to stop being nosy. You figured one of the others knew about you, and that confirmed it.

“Give meeee…” he thinks and hums, “three days. How does that sound?”

“Tuesday? Okay I’ll see you a Tuesday.”

He sighs and fumbles with his things, and it sounds like he almost drops his phone, “you’ll be at work.”

The worry and uneasiness in his voice is too much, but you know now matter what you say, he’ll feel bad—he’ll feel guilty.

“Just tell me when, and I’ll be there to greet you.”

｡˚☽˚｡⋆

June

“We’re okay, right?” Seungmin is standing in the kitchen, leaning against the counter. His back is to you, but you still hear his soft voice. It almost sounds like he's not talking to you, like he's speaking to someone else in front of him, like he doesn't really want you to hear.

And you’re not sure why he would even ask you that, because as far as you know, yeah, you’re okay. The two of you are the same as you've ever been. He just got home a few hours ago, though, and he’s been a little quieter than usual.

“I think so,” you watch him carefully, but he doesn’t move from his spot. “I mean…I’m okay. Are you okay, Min?”

“Yeah, I am.”

“Anything you wanna talk about?”

From where you’re sitting, you can see him slowly shake his head, slump his shoulders a little, and drink his coffee. He’s tired, and he needs to sleep. Maybe talking can wait until after he’s gotten some rest.

“Come sit with me. Please.”

He rubs at his neck and turns to face you, and he looks…off. He didn’t look quite like that this morning when he came through the door. And he still isn’t getting any closer to you.

“Baby, what’s the matter?”

Finally he starts toward you, but he doesn’t look happy about it. His head falls back and you can see him scrunch his nose at the air, “I’m okay.” He sits down next to you and sinks back into the couch.

“Maybe you should get some sleep.”

“I’m not tired.”

His voice is still soft, but he says it quickly and with no thought. He sounds annoyed, and you’re not sure how to take it, or reply. He’s been gone for a while—either away or just so busy that he couldn’t get away to even see you. You haven’t seen him face to face since the 23rd of May, and you only spent the night together—he’s been spending every night for the last few weeks at his dorm.

And he is tired. He can tell you whatever he wants, but you know him well enough to hear it in his voice and see it in his eyes. They’re in the middle of a comeback, so you’re actually surprised he showed up this morning, unannounced.

“Okay, okay I’m sorry.”

He looks at you, eyes heavy. It feels like he’s looking right through you and at the wall. For the first time, you’re unsure about leaning forward and kissing him, or grabbing his hand.

The quiet between you continues, and the longer it goes on, the harder it is to break. Seungmin closes his eyes and lets out a deep breath, sinks even further into the couch. You sit back on the other end and try not to look at him. Instead, you look at your phone. Stare blankly at it. There’s nothing there you want to see. You have him here with you, and he’s the only thing you want.

The last time you sat together here on the couch, he was cuddled on top of you, unable to sleep, but trying to relax. Humming happily against your chest, rubbing his hand over your arm. You think back to greeting him at the door this morning—he kissed you on the lips, pecked you on the cheek, then disappeared into the bedroom with his things.

The sinking feeling in your stomach gets even worse.

His eyes are still closed, at least. When you rise from your spot on the couch and head for the kitchen, he does exactly what you hope he does—it only takes a few minutes until he folds himself up and gets comfortable. And you know when he’s fast asleep, you can see it in the way his body rises and falls so steadily with his breath, and how his fingers twitch every so often.

Now you just have to hope everything is okay when he wakes up.

｡˚☽˚｡⋆

"Hey...hi."

Seungmin is peeking around through the crack in the bedroom door. You closed yourself in there so the living room would be silent for him. And you know when he finally woke he was groggy, confused by the dark, and by the quiet. There are so many windows in there, but you made sure to pull every curtain shut tight.

"Can I come in?" His voice is still small.

You give him a nod, and he immediately steps in and pushes the door most of the way closed. A half finished water bottle swings from his hand, his bare feet shuffle a little on the carpet. He seems to be avoiding your gaze as he makes his way to his side of the bed. Carefully, he climbs on—trying not to disturb the papers you have strewn around—curls up into a ball like he did on the couch, and even though it's warm, he gets all the way under the blanket.

"You wanna talk yet? We don't have to…but...“

You told each other you’d always talk and be open, even on the bad days. Especially on the bad days. Seungmin is having one (or several) of those, and he’s obviously struggling. He has spoken to you openly about his feelings before, so you know he’s capable. You just wonder if he will this time.

“I’m your person, remember? You can give me some of what you’re feeling. Whatever is going on in here…” You set your palm on his forehead, run your fingers through his hair. He relaxes, but still doesn’t talk or move as you gather up your things, set them aside, and get under the covers with him. There’s a moment of hesitation and a little jump in your stomach, but eventually you reach for and grab his hand. He doesn’t pull away, and you’re relieved when he squeezes his fingers around yours. “You can tell me.”

“Mm…I’m not sure.”

“Not sure what’s going on in here?” You rub his temple and a smile tugs at the corner of his mouth. “That’s okay.”

“I do…but I don’t.”

“Is it work?”

“Sometimes.” He looks at you. “You’re right, I’m very tired. I’m sorry.”

“Is it just that… just worn out? It seems like more.”

Seungmin squeezes your fingers again. “We have been doing so much, I have been…I don’t feel like I’m doing my best.”

Being hard on himself is not new, to him or to you. But he’s usually able to see through it and pull himself up, keep going, push forward.

Everything lately, and you’ve kept up with every single comeback moment, performance, interview, etc…has been exhausting as a spectator. You can’t imagine being him. You can’t put yourself in his place. The amount of eyes on him, and the criticism—you could never handle it.

“Oh, pup…I wish I could make those feelings go away. You do so well, all the time.”

He moves closer to you, puts your arm around his waist. You squeeze him until he finds a good spot and nuzzles against you, but he’s still tense.

“I know I’m biased and you might not believe me, but I watch you all the time. Only you. And you’ve been amazing every single day. Did you go back and listen to yourself singing Laundry?”

He nods against you, hums a little mhm.

“You sounded beautiful. And you looked like a prince.”

“I do believe that you’re biased,” Seungmin laughs a little into your neck, “I’m glad you think I did well, thank you.”

“It’s not an opinion, Minnie. It’s the truth. And I know there’s more. You’re always hard on yourself, but you’ve never come home like this.”

Seungmin squeezes himself even harder against you—face in your neck, legs twisted with yours, air being forced out of your lungs by his grip. He groans loudly as he softens his hold.

“Why did you ask if we were okay earlier?”

He goes right back into your neck and sighs.

“…Seungmin.”

Another muffled sigh, a groan. “I’m just being stupid.”

“You’re not being stupid if something is upsetting you.”

“My sister accidentally told an old school friend of mine about us. She didn’t believe her, she said this would be worse than a long distance relationship, and something like this is silly and would never last.”

“Silly?” You take him by his shoulders and force him out. You need to look at him. “Us?”

Seungmin nods and looks anywhere but at you. “She said it’s just a matter of time before you lose interest in me. We spend too much time apart, and it’s not normal.” He pulls the covers up to his chin and pushes himself down. Now all you can see is his eyes, his forehead, and his blond hair spread across the pillow. “I ignored it, but then I didn’t hear from you yesterday, or the day before so I started thinking about it too much. And we haven’t seen each other at all lately, I’m so exhausted, and I feel like I’m not doing well enough. I’m not a good boyfriend.”

“Oh…” his words, no matter how softly he speaks, knock the wind out of you. You think back to yesterday, the text you typed and didn’t see sitting in the message box, unsent, until very late last night. And the day before…you were at work for twelve hours, but figured Seungmin was so busy anyway. “Oh, Min…I’m so sorry I didn’t text you. But none of that is true.”

The room feels warmer, but it’s not. You’re just angry at yourself for leaving him on read. You push the covers away from both of you and plant kisses all over his face, “I love you more every time I see you, or hear your voice,” you move your lips gently over his ear, making him giggle, “even if I’m an idiot and forget to send a text.”

“I was starting to think I was away too long.”

“You have been gone too long, and I’ve missed you, but you’re gonna have to do a lot more than that. I haven’t forgotten how long I went without you after we first met.”

Seungmin covers his face with both hands, but his hesitant smile is peeking out beneath it. He runs a hand through his hair, flips onto his back, and kicks the blankets away. “Don’t remind me.”

“Don’t ever say you’re not good enough.”

The look on his face is still unsure. He’s staring up at the wall, blinking slowly. Lost in thought, maybe.

“I think we’ve done pretty okay so far.”

“I know you could find someone to be with you every day if you wanted, and you deserve that.”

You reach out and grab his hand again, “finding someone isn’t easy, and finding someone like you is…impossible. I’d take this over any of my past together-every-day relationships.”

Seungmin looks you up and down, settles his gaze on your face, and rolls over until he’s hanging over you, “yeah?”

“That didn’t make the relationship good. You make this good.”

Lips graze your cheek—he kisses softly down to your jaw, and across your neck, “good,” he sighs when your fingers run through his hair, and he collapses onto you. He mumbles something into your neck.

“Hm?”

“Did you call me…pup?” He’s smiling fully for the first time all day, beaming at you. A completely different person from earlier.

"Yeah, I've never called you that before? I’m pretty sure I have”

"I don't remember, but I like it.”

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Crying, (s)creaming, begging for more 🙏

the skz house: ch 20

a/n: thank you @bahablastplz for editing! i am so excited to get this chapter out to you guys. i hope you enjoy it! its quite long, i don't normally add a word count, but i should warn you before you get started haha

wc: 10,370

[ read chapter 19 here ]

Chapter 20: Of Father's & Basements

You follow Changbin up the stairs in autopilot mode, your body moving one foot after the other without you even thinking about it. Your mind is stuck on what’s happening on the first floor. Why would his father show up like this? Why hadn’t anyone warned you guys before you got on the plane? He didn’t appear at the house, in the country, out of nowhere…someone had to of known he was coming. They shouldn’t have blindsided Chan like that.

“No, I don’t need any help, y/n. I’ve got it,” Changbin attempts to joke.

You blink and refocus on him in front of you. His arms are tense and shaking from the weight of yours and Chan’s suitcases.

“Sorry,” you murmur as he puts them on the ground at the third floor.

He takes in your expression as he raises the handles on the suitcases. He doesn’t say anything further about it as he starts pushing them towards Chan’s door. You trail behind him again.

“Bin?” you call to him when he stops at the door. “What’s going on?”

“I’m not really sure.” he replies, turning to face you.  

“But you have some idea, don’t you?”

You watch his face carefully. He’s typically always smiling or joking about something but right now there’s not a trace of either.

“Is his family alright? No one’s hurt?” you continue.

“Yeah, they’re fine,” he reassures you.

You feel some relief at that, but it’s almost immediately replaced by a sinking feeling of dread in the pit of your stomach. If his family is alright and his dad still showed up here, two days after Christmas…

You think back to Chan’s behavior on the flight heading to Miami and after speaking with his family on the phone Christmas Eve. He knew something was wrong, even then. Whatever it was, though, he clearly hadn’t expected his father to show up because of it. You don’t want to believe it has anything to do with you, but your gut instinct is telling you otherwise.

“Changbin,” you say, pleading to him with your eyes on the brink of tears. You don’t want to think that you’re the cause of all this. If you hadn’t been so persistent in getting Chan to break down his walls, maybe this wouldn’t be happening right now. You wouldn’t have even asked him to come on the trip, he would have gone home and wouldn’t be facing the wrath of his father two stories below you.  

“It’s not my place to say anything. I’m sorry,” he says sincerely.

With his words, you’re reminded of your role in this house. As close as you may have gotten to every one of the members, you are still an outsider. There are certain things you don’t have the privilege of knowing.

Changbin opens the door to Chan’s room and pushes the luggage inside. You walk past him and enter; he closes the door and leaves you alone inside. You resist the urge to crumble on the floor and instead sit on the edge of Chan’s bed. You’ll wait for him to come up and then you can get some answers, you can make sure he’s okay.

Some time passes and he doesn’t come up. When you re-emerge from the room and go back downstairs to find him, you’re informed he’s left the house with his father. You wonder how long they’ve been gone and why he didn’t text you to let you know.

You already know why he didn’t. It’s none of your business. You can’t forget that.

Chan doesn’t come back at all that night.

It’s Wednesday, and even though neither Hyunjin nor Chan are home you still stick to the schedule. You curl up into a ball on your bed in Chan’s room, alone. But you hardly sleep.

The next morning you’re shuffling throughout the house, keeping yourself busy with household chores. It’s why you’re here, is what you keep telling yourself. You interact with the other members and assignees that are home, but everything feels off without Chan or Hyunjin around. You do their laundry—clothes and linen—clean the kitchen, vacuum the floors. Anything to keep your mind preoccupied.

It's well into the afternoon and you’re vacuuming the living room. You don’t hear the front door open; you’re so caught up in your thoughts you don’t even hear your name being called. It isn’t until a pair of arms wrap around your waist that you’re pulled from your thoughts, jumping and screaming at the sudden contact.

With one look down at the arms around you, the rings on the fingers…you know it’s Hyunjin. You shut off the vacuum and spin around, wrapping your arms around him in a tight embrace.

“Aww, you missed me?” He teases, squeezing you back just as tightly.

“I thought you were coming back tomorrow,” you say, your voice muffled against his chest.

“Change of plans,” he shrugs, resting his cheek on top of your head as you remain in the embrace.

You don’t want to let him go yet. You need him too much. He lets you hold on to him a while longer and when you finally pull away, he’s smiling down at you. You take in his still darkened locks, perfectly structured face, his plump lips, the adorable freckle beneath his eye, the eyebrow piercing…

Your hand flies to his chin, tilting his head up while the other brushes his hair away from his face.

“Hwang Hyunjin,” you say sternly.

He winces at the use of his surname, taking both of your wrists in his hands to bring them away from his face. He shakes his head causing his hair to fall back in place, covering his eyebrows.

“You hate it?”

You free one of your hands from his loose grip on your wrists and brush his bangs back again, taking in the look on him.

“Well, I do think your face is perfect without it…but it looks good on you.”

“I know,” he responds with a wink.

You swat him on the arm playfully, already feeling more at ease with him at home.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming back early? I would have come pick you up.”

“You just got back yesterday…I thought I was being considerate,” he explains. “Thought maybe you’d like to rest and here I find you, Cinderella-ing away.”

“I needed a distraction,” you shrug.

He ushers you towards the couch. He sits and you plop down next to him, feeling the exhaustion from the work you’ve been doing all morning hit you all at once.

“How was your trip?” he inquires.

“Better than I expected.” You turn to face him on the couch. “Until we got back…I’m sure you know.”

“I heard,” he nods. “He’s fine. He’ll be back soon.”

You exhale a long sigh. You know better than to ask for more details at this point. Even Hyunjin wouldn’t be able to break their code and explain anything to you. It’s hard to reconcile with that fact, truly. The only person who can elaborate is Chan and he’s nowhere to be found, and there’s no telling if he even will when he returns.

“Did you have a good time back home?” you ask.

“It was nice to see my family. Kkami, most of all,” he tells you. “But I don’t think my mom could get me out of the house fast enough after I showed up with this piercing. She thought my dad would lose his shit if he saw it.”

The tone in which they speak of their fathers is always shockingly cavalier. This does nothing to help your concerns over where Chan is.

“So, you were sent back early?”

“For my own safety,” he laughs.

Considering Chan has been M.I.A for almost 24 hours now after his father showed up, you don’t find this funny at all. Their dads wouldn’t actually physically harm them…would they? The thought makes you feel sick to your stomach. If Chan shows back up with scars or bruises, you are liable to lose it.

Hyunjin hooks a finger under your chin and brings your attention back to him.

“Let’s go get lunch,” he suggests.

“I haven’t even showered yet.” You look down at yourself and brush back the hairs that have fallen from your messy bun.

“Well go shower, I’ll unpack…then we’ll get lunch.”

“I’ll unpack for you later,” you say.

“I need something to do, or I’ll pass out and fuck up my sleep schedule even more.”

“Okay,” you concede softly.

Before you can stand, Hyunjin pulls you onto his lap, his eyes searching yours. He cups your face with one hand, stroking the side of your face with his fingers. You lean into his touch. You want to apologize for being in such a sour mood when he’s just returned home, but all you can muster is a forced smile.

He gives a small shake of his head in return.

You don’t have to say anything. No apologies are necessary. You can feel whatever you’re feeling. You should know that already.

He brings your face to his and places a chaste kiss on your lips. He doesn’t part his lips, doesn’t deepen the kiss. He keeps his lips against yours and you feel a little more of the tension subsiding.

Changbin tries to weasel his way into lunch with you and Hyunjin, but Hyunjin firmly shuts him down. The two of you venture out alone—you have lunch then make a few stops for groceries and to pick up saline for Hyunjin’s piercing. While unpacking, he realized he left the bottle he bought in Korea. Which, of course he did.

When you return home, Chan still isn’t back. You’re sad at that, but far less than you would have been if Hyunjin weren’t here. Your saving grace, however, is pulled away by Changbin and you’re left to put away the groceries with Rhiannon. You’re far from hungry but you help her make dinner for the others that are home.

“He did not,” you say to her when she reveals that Allie texted the group chat what Lee Know got her for Christmas. You left your phone upstairs, not wanting to continuously check it for a text from Chan you know isn’t coming.

“He did. He really did,” she says laughing as she wipes her hands to take her phone out of her pocket. She turns it around to show you the picture.

It’s a selfie of Allie, her expression is a mixture of shock and confusion as she holds a butt plug next to her face.

Charlotte sent several eye covering emojis beneath it.

“What the fuck,” you say, laughing with her.

“I know. Raunchy.” She sets her phone back on the counter and returns her attention to the meat on the stove.

You get back to chopping the vegetables on the cutting board in front of you.

“Not just raunchy…it’s actually kinda rude considering he turned down her offer for anal sex last month,” you tell her.

“Exactly! She’s never going to let him do it now,” Rhiannon replies.

Someone clears their throat near the kitchen entrance and you both turn your heads to see who it is.

Chan.

You’re frozen in place, mid-chop. Of course, he’d return while you’re in the midst of discussing anal sex.

You take in his expression—he seems okay. He looks like he didn’t get much sleep, but he’s alive and well on all other counts. His lips turn up into a smile when you look at him and you surely could use your stethoscope right now, because it feels like your heart skips a beat at the sight.

“Hey,” he says to you softly.

“Hey,” you reply.

“You okay?” he asks.

“Me?” you ask incredulously. “I’m fine. Are you okay?”

He holds his hand out for you. You set down the knife and walk to him, placing your hand in his when you’re close enough. He brings you to him, wrapping his arms around you, hands resting on your ass.

“I am now,” he confirms.  

He still seems like the Chan from your trip, and you let out a small breath. You feared that the brick walls you worked so hard to bulldoze through would be replaced by impenetrable steel. Maybe you overreacted. Maybe it wasn’t as bad as all that you were thinking. Though, what choice had he left you with?

“Will you tell me about it later?” You ask quietly.

“I don’t know that it’s conducive after everything…but I will, if you want me to.”

You nod.

“Okay.” he says.

“Okay.” you echo.

He places a quick kiss to your forehead, then smacks you on the butt.

“As long as you tell me what all this anal talk was about.” He says, loud enough for Rhiannon to hear.

Your eyes open wide, and Rhiannon starts guffawing behind you.

You sit next to Hyunjin for dinner, though neither you eat. It’s just nice to be with everyone again. Well, almost everyone. Jeongin, Lee Know, Felix, Allie and Seungmin still aren’t back yet. You occasionally glance towards Chan—he still seems fine. Though, he’s not actively contributing to the conversation he still chimes in occasionally. You want to know what’s on his mind so badly and silently wish for everyone to finish eating faster.

After dinner, both Chan and Hyunjin go up to their rooms while you help Rhiannon with the dishes.

On your way upstairs, an unfamiliar conflict weighs on you as you ascend to the third floor to see Chan. It’s a Friday…you’re supposed to be with Hyunjin. And you will be. But…the last week and a half with only Chan has you feeling out of sorts. You try to tell yourself that nothing has changed…you still care deeply for them both. The connection you now have with Chan is what you always wanted. This will allow you to be with both of them comfortably. Chan opening up to you and professing the feelings he has harbored towards you for years, however, is what has you out of sorts.

Chan’s door is open when you reach it; you knock on it to alert him of your presence. He’s seated at his desk and spins around in his chair as you enter. His laptop is open and you see the familiar music program displayed on the screen. If he was able to get right back to work on their project, he really must be fine.

“So…” you trail off, sitting on the edge of his bed.

“So,” he repeats. “Anal sex?”

Your expression falls flat, and he chuckles. He knows what you’re here to discuss.

“Okay, okay, sorry. What do you wanna know?”

“Why did your dad come here? Where did you go?”

“To check on me,” he tells you. “We went for dinner and then I stayed at the hotel with him.”

“Check on you for what? Are you unwell?”

You know he’s not, but he’s being brief with his responses. You don’t want to blame him; you are throwing multiple questions at once in his direction. It must feel like an interrogation.

“He knew…he knows…about us, I mean.”

“What about us?”

“That I canceled my trip home to go with you instead.”

“And he flew all the way out here for that?”

“It’s just…not something I would normally do. Skipping out on certain obligations and Christmas with my family, my siblings in particular.”

“Shit, Chan…I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault. I wanted to go with you.”

“You’ve never missed a Christmas with your family?” He shakes his head. “And that’s why he was so pissed?”

Chan is quiet for a moment.

“The trip was…well, you are a deviation from my plans.”

You arch an eyebrow at that.

“From their plans, you mean?”

“They are my plans, too,” he shrugs, “…he just wanted to make sure I’m not straying from the path.”

“Are you?”

He sighs.

“I’m trying really hard not to. I don’t want to disappoint them, they’ve done so much for me. But I also want to give this a try—being open and transparent with you…even knowing how it will end.”

It strikes you then that you may have to be stronger than Chan at the end of this semester. You don’t know if you can do that.  

“You deserve to be happy too, Chan. Even if it’s just for a little while.”

Until he moves on and finds a suitable partner that will please his parents. You wonder if that’s the obligation he mentioned, but you can’t bring yourself to directly ask him about that.

“I’m gonna try.”

“We’ll just enjoy the time we have together?”

“Yes.”

“And even with all the things you told me in Miami, you’re okay with me sleeping in Hyunjin’s bed tonight?”

“I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want you all to myself,” he confesses. “But it’s Hyunjin…I know he’s good to you and handles you with care. And he’ll give you back when I need you.”

When he needs you? You grip the edges of his mattress to refrain from smiling stupidly at that.

“After our trip it feels a little heavier, you know?”

“Does it?” he asks, as though it’s not obvious why it would. “I’ve shared everything with these guys since we were kids…I know it sounds crazy, but this is not that different.”

You scrunch up your face at that. Is he comparing you to a toy or clothing item they share amongst the group?

“So, you’re okay with me sleeping with all of them?”

His eyes darken at that.

“Fuck no. Just one. Just Hyunjin. That’s all I can bear.”

You laugh at his reaction.

“Just checking.”

As convoluted as the overall situation is, his answer makes sense. Aside from him finally opening up to you, nothing has changed. He still felt this way the entire time you’d already been with Hyunjin and there hadn’t been any problems about that. The only difference now is that you know too. And what you will make of that information over time.

“Does it seem unfair?” you ask.

“What?”

“That you only get me…and I get you and Hyunjin?”

“I only get you?” He arches an eyebrow. “The fact that I get you at all is enough.”

The sincerity in his tone makes your eyes sting. He strokes your cheek with the back of his fingers.

“I’d trust him with my life…I trust him with you, too. Now, go down there to him before I change my mind and tie you up here.”

A flurry of butterflies make their way from your stomach down to your pussy at that remark. It sounds tempting enough to make you hesitate to return downstairs so quickly. You’ve been without Hyunjin for so long, though. You can’t deny that you physically miss him too.  

You lean forward to give him a kiss before standing.

“See you tomorrow?” he nods. “Goodnight.”

“Night.”

Back in Hyunjin’s room, you find him in the dark, sprawled out on the bed on his stomach, already snoring. You could have stayed upstairs after all. But after the long day of travel he’s had, his fatigue is understandable. You shake him awake, telling him to get beneath the blankets. He does as you tell him; his eyes still partially closed. You change into your pajamas before climbing into bed with him. He cuddles up to you, throwing one leg over both of yours and resting his head on your shoulder.

You wonder how you’ll adjust to this new normal with both of them. Or if it will ever feel normal.

It’s no surprise Hyunjin remains dead to the world long after you’ve woken up the next day. Even after you shower and return to his room, he’s still knocked out. It’s been nearly twelve hours, which gives you a brief moment of concern. You walk to the side of the bed and stand still, watching him intently until you see the rise and fall of his chest confirming he’s alive.

You head downstairs and see that Changbin, Han and Charlotte are in the living room. You join them, watching TV for a while before Changbin suggests getting supplies for tomorrow. You go to the store with them to buy various New Year’s Eve accessories for everyone. Then, on a whim, take an hour-long detour to purchase fireworks. Changbin tries to assure you they’re the perfectly legal kind, but Han can’t lie to save his life.

You text Hyunjin and Chan to let them know where you are, though you’re sure they’re already aware. When you make it back to the house it’s nearly 5:00pm and the sun has already set. You feel like most of the day has been spent on nonsensical, illegal errands but at least it’s still winter break and you don’t have to worry about waking up for a class tomorrow.

Han and Charlotte immediately go off to his room when you make it back inside, while Changbin and Rhiannon hangout in the kitchen. They mention something about ordering takeout for dinner and you tell them whatever is fine as you make your way to the basement where Hyunjin and Chan are.

They’re in the midst of playing pool. Hyunjin, clad in a pair of black Adidas track pants and a long-sleeved white t-shirt looks up at you and smiles when you enter. He has a thin headband in his hair, keeping it out of his face and putting that striking new eyebrow piercing on full display.

Chan has his back to you. He’s dressed equally as comfortable in his typical sweatpants and  plain black t-shirt.

“We were just talking about you,” Hyunjin announces.

Chan turns around and greets you with a smile as well.

“Oh yeah?” you ask suspiciously. “What about me?”

“All good things,” Hyunjin replies.

“Only good things,” Chan adds.

You squint your eyes at them, “Uh-huh. Sure.”

You stop at the pool table, surveying the game. Whoever is stripes is losing badly

“Wanna take over? I suck.” Hyunjin offers you the pool cue.

“I’m no better,” you say.

“Let’s start a new game,” Chan suggests. “You two can be a team.”

You take the pool cue from Hyunjin, and he busies himself with racking the balls at the opposite end of the table. You walk over to Chan and nudge him with your shoulder.

“Hey.”

“Hey,” he replies, placing his hand around your waist to pull you close. “Ready to lose?”

“Never,” you say, pushing him away.

Hyunjin finishes setting up the new game then disappears behind the bar. He returns with three drinks—beers for them and a White Claw for you.

“Are we placing bets?” you ask, cracking the top of the can open and taking a sip.

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea,” Hyunjin says. “We probably will lose.”

Chan nods confidently and you roll your eyes.

“Alright, let’s get warmed up then,” you say, stepping away from the table to set your drink on the bar.  

 “You guys wanna break?” Chan asks, chalking up the end of his cue.

You and Hyunjin share a look before both shaking your heads.

Chan laughs as he walks to the end of the pool table and bends over. He lines the cue up with the white ball and slides it between his fingers a few times before thrusting forward with so much power that all the other balls are sent in various directions across the table. He sinks a stripe and tosses a wink in your direction.

He goes twice more before it’s your turn. It’s a good thing you didn’t place any bets. You go to take your turn and your form is terrible, you don’t know what you’re doing. Hyunjin comes to assist you, offering a few tips. He stands behind you, placing one hand on your hip and one hand on your arm to help line you up.

“I don’t know if I’d listen to him,” Chan quips. “He might be worse than you.”

You do your best to ignore him and take your shot, but he’s right. You don’t hit anything.

The next time it’s your turn, Chan comes to your aid.

“It’s all about maths,” he says, placing his hands on you in the same way Hyunjin had, but he’s standing much closer. You feel your body get warmer and instinctively lean into him more. You can’t help it. “Geometry. You see the solid green ball?”

Your eyes flicker to where he’s pointing, but you could be looking at a rainbow-colored ball for all you know.

There have been very few times that it’s just been you, Chan and Hyunjin. And never simply hanging out for the hell of it. The relaxed mood of winter break and nearly empty house has provided this opportunity. However, it leaves you feeling uncertain about how to act. You’re not necessarily a completely different person around them alone…but you feel slightly apprehensive about showing either of them flirtatious or sexual attention in a shared setting.

“You can make a bank shot if you hit it at the right angle,” he tells you, bringing your attention back to the game as he guides your cue to the white ball. “Hit it right there—but you gotta use the right amount of force.”

Hyunjin is leaning against the wall, watching and rolling his eyes.

“Listen to this guy,” he scoffs and sips his beer. “Like he’s a professional or something.”

“Try it,” Chan says, stepping back to give you room.

You want to tell him to come back, that you still need more instructions. But how would that make Hyunjin feel? For you to so blatantly yearn for Chan’s touch right in front of him? You doubt that it would upset him…but would he be turned off by it? It is your day to be with him after all, not Chan.

You take a deep breath and shake your head, focusing on the green ball and where you need to hit it. You do exactly as Chan told you and it works.  

You stand up straight with a smile on your face.

“What were you saying?” Chan asks Hyunjin.

Hyunjin says nothing, just sips from his beer again.

You take another turn and miss. You frown.

“Baby steps,” Chan consoles you.

Even with your newfound knowledge, you and Hyunjin still lose the game. Changbin yells down when the food arrives, but the three of you collectively decide to play again instead. Hyunjin and Chan continue their banter, and you feel somewhat like a pawn in their arguments. But not in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable. If anything, it helps you ease into being around them both simultaneously. Something you’ve wanted from the very beginning.

When it’s Chan’s turn to shoot, Hyunjin comes to your side, holding or touching you in some way. And when it’s Hyunjin’s turn, Chan does the same. The fact that they both seem comfortable with it and aren’t making a big deal out of it makes you feel a little better about being so blatantly shared by them.

“If I make this,” Hyunjin says, lining up his next shot. “You have to kiss me.”

Chan, standing next to you with his arm around your waist, pulls you closer to himself but keeps his eyes on the table. You look at the set up as well—the ball Hyunjin is aiming for is literally right next to the side pocket. It’d be nearly impossible to miss. He knows he’ll make it. He wants to kiss you right here? In front of Chan?

You offer a shrug in response, for lack of anything better to do. You don’t want to offend either of them. Touching and caressing, even like they did in the hot tub, is one thing, but full on kissing? Is that not too much? You look back and forth between them—both completely unbothered by the suggestion, though Chan’s grip around your waist seems to tighten.

Hyunjin shoots and sinks the ball in the side pocket, then stands with a proud smile plastered to his face. He saunters towards where you’re standing near the bar and your pulse quickens. Chan drops his hand from your waist and leaves your side, heading to the pool table. Your eyes remain on him as he picks up the chalk to rub across the tip of his cue. Is he giving you some privacy or something?

Hyunjin hooks a finger under your chin, forcing you to turn and look at him.

Your eyes flutter shut as he presses his lips to yours. You start to pull back—assuming it would be just a quick peck—but Hyunjin’s hand moves to the back of your head and holds you in place. His tongue snakes out, slipping past your lips and into your mouth. It’s been over two weeks since you last felt his soft, plump lips against yours. Two weeks since you’ve tasted him. You’d forgotten how much you missed it.

Hyunjin breaks the kiss, pulling away from you with a smile. You feel your face flush and instinctively look towards Chan. He’s watching you both, nodding with his tongue caught between his teeth on the side. You don’t know what to make of that look.

“It’s still your turn, Hyunjin.” he states.

“Yeah,” Hyunjin agrees. “It is my turn.”

He leans forward again to capture your lips. You laugh and push him away, back towards the table to play. You’re well aware of how long it’s been since he’s had you. It is, most definitely, his turn. As crude as it sounds.

Hyunjin shoots again but misses.

“I’m disoriented,” he attests.

Chan walks around the table, looking at the remaining options. When he sees a shot to take, he stops and bends over to line up his cue.

“If I make this, you have to kiss me, y/n.”

You do your best to keep a straight face. It’s the start of winter and the basement should feel much colder, but you’re warm all over. Maybe it’s the alcohol. Maybe it’s these men that seem hellbent on driving you insane.

Chan doesn’t give you an opportunity to agree or not. He shoots, and sinks it in. Of course he does. He straightens himself with a smile and beckons you over with a jerk of his head. You slide off your stool and he leans back against the pool table. As soon as you’re close enough, he reaches for your hip with his free hand and pulls you to him. You let out a quick gasp at the sudden movement. You’re pressed directly against him. You can hear your pulse thumping furiously and you can feel Hyunjin’s eyes on you.

Chan looks down at you, waiting. You slowly push up onto your tiptoes. This is a first for you—kissing one guy then another within a span of minutes. Chan doesn’t seem bothered by it at all. You have to remind yourself this isn’t their first rodeo. Though, you don’t want to think too much on that. You tilt your head back, getting the angle right as your head moves closer to his. When your lips connect, he kisses you back hungrily, almost as if asserting his dominance or expressing his need for you more.

He moves your hips against him, and you can feel cock. He’s hard. He likes this.

You break the kiss and take a step back, eyes still shut. You don’t want to open them. You don’t want to look at either of them right now. You contemplate taking off up the stairs to hide out in the den for the rest of the night. But you wouldn’t do that…you couldn’t. Not when you’re kinda starting to enjoy this too.

The sound of Chan shooting again causes your eyes to snap open just in time to see him scratch.  

“I’m disoriented,” he mimics Hyunjin.

It’s now your turn. You slide past Chan and walk to the other side of the table, looking at the remaining balls. You don’t have many options.

“If I make this,” you say, settling on a shot and lining up your cue. “You both have to kiss each other.”

You spare a glance up at both of them to see their shocked expressions and grin. Good. They can have a taste of their own medicine.

But you miss.  

“I’m disoriented,” you sass.

“Thank God for that,” Hyunjin says and you all laugh.

You play the remainder of the game without any more kissing. You and Hyunjin still wind up losing. Again. You start to rack up for another game when Hyunjin excuses himself to the bathroom.

As soon as he turns to leave, Chan comes up behind you and puts his hands on your hips. He spins you around to face him.

“Chan,” you warn, placing your hands on his chest.

“Hmmm?” he picks you up and sets you on the pool table, not giving you a chance to say anything else before his lips collide with yours.

His mouth and hands are needy, all over you the moment he has you alone. You feel powerless to him when he’s like this—how could you deprive him of what he so desperately wants? You kiss him back and wrap your legs around his waist.

His hand finds one of yours and guides it between you, placing it on his hard cock. You bite down on his bottom lip before pulling away from the kiss as you squeeze his cock between your fingers.

“I’ve thought of all the different ways I could fuck you on this table over the last hour,” he asserts, trailing kisses along your jawline and down the side your neck.

“We can’t,” you reply.

He slips his hand beneath your sweatshirt to palm your breast.

“You don’t want me to?”

He forces you down onto the table with one hand and lifts your sweatshirt with the other. He pulls down the cup of your bra, and you let out a deep breath. You know you’d let him take you right here, even if the whole house were in the room.

“Tell me to stop,” he says, removing his hand from your shoulder as he leans down over you, taking your nipple into his mouth.

He swirls his tongue around it, keeping his eyes on yours, daring you to stop him. When you don’t, he pulls down the other side of your bra and latches his mouth on to that nipple.

“But, Hyunjin—”

He bites down on your nipple at that, and you gasp. He releases your nipple from his mouth and blows cool air over it, watching as it hardens.

“You’re mine, yeah?” he asks.

You keep your mouth shut and nod in response.

“You do what I want,” he pinches both of your nipples between his fingers, “when I want.”

“But what if he—”

You’re cut off again when he pinches your nipples harder, pulling on them and making you arch your back. The pain he’s inflicted sends shockwaves straight to your pussy. You don’t know how much of this she can take before turning completely feral. You bite on your lip to keep from crying out.

With your legs hooked around him, you pull him closer to you, wanting to grind yourself against him.

“There she is,” he says with a crooked smile. “I hope I didn’t spoil you too much on the trip.”

He continues to pinch and pull at your nipples.

“The things I said don’t change anything about this.”

The last few days of your vacation had been gentle…some might say loving. You hadn’t assumed he’d turned a new leaf sexually, though. You know what he likes, you know what he wants from you.

He releases your nipples and hooks a finger in the middle of your bra, using it to bring you up to him. He lets go when you’re upright and your sweatshirt falls, covering you up.

“When Hyunjin comes back down,” he says, hands caressing your thighs. “I want you to go upstairs and change into something more comfortable. No panties. No bra. Then come back here.”

Your mind immediately begins racing about why he would want you to do that, but you know better than to question him at a time like this.

“Okay?”

“Yes, Chan.”

He takes a step back and you lower yourself from the table just as Hyunjin returns. You slide away from Chan and head for the stairs, passing Hyunjin on your way.

“You leaving?”

“I’ll be back,” you tell him. “Just going to change.”

He nods at that, and you leave him behind. On your way to follow Chan’s instructions, you see Changbin and Rhiannon cuddled up on the couch. They don’t pay you any attention as you pass by, too caught up in whatever they’re watching. You scurry along to Hyunjin’s room and contemplate what to wear. What does he even mean by something comfortable? You settle on a pair of gym shorts and leave your sweater on but take off the bra beneath it, and put your hair up into a ponytail.

When you return to the basement, the lights above the pool table and bar are off. Just the soft glow of the TV against the back wall illuminates the room. You walk towards it and spot both Hyunjin and Chan seated on opposite ends of the sofa. You take a seat between them with Hyunjin on your left and Chan on your right. Hyunjin tosses a large blanket over you and you hug it tightly to you.

You sit with your legs folded on the couch, body rigid as you overthink which way, if any, you should lean.

Chan controls the TV, scrolling through various movie options. He doesn’t ask what anyone else cares to see before settling on one. Your eyes are very much looking at the screen, but they’re not focused. You don’t know what he picked. Your mind is still trying to figure out why he wanted you to change and if either of them would be offended should you choose to lay on one of them and not the other.  

The movie starts to play, and you immediately recognize that the audio is in Korean. Chan is fucking with you, per usual. He knows there’s no way you’ll be able to concentrate on the film and read the subtitles while you’re sitting between them without any underwear on.

“You comfortable?” Chan’s voice breaks into your thoughts.

You don’t know if he means in general or if you’ve followed his instructions on getting comfortable. You turn to look at him and nod your head in response.

“Lay down,” he says softly but it’s not a request.

With Chan, he’s always in control.

With Hyunjin, it’s an equal balance between the two of you, and never to the extent of what Chan does.

You want to ask which way but you’re feeling all out of sorts at the dynamics. Showing yourself to be completely submissive in front of Hyunjin feels strange, but for all you know, he’s already aware. You don’t know what things they talk about amongst themselves.

You’re still looking at Chan when you feel Hyunjin’s hand on your shoulder. He pulls you to him, laying you against his side. He leaves his hand wrapped around you. You exhale a small breath and snuggle up to him, readjusting yourself so your legs are curled on the couch.

Chan lifts the blanket and pulls some of the excess fabric to cover his lap. He then brings your legs across his thighs and starts to caress them.

You revert your attention to the screen, still unaware of what movie is playing, but you can’t look anywhere else. Not at Chan, not at Hyunjin. You’re not stupid. You know something is about to happen, but not knowing what is bothering you.

Several minutes pass and you start to think maybe, just maybe you’re only going to watch the movie. Maybe Chan just wanted you to get changed, to know that you’re going commando. You know better than that, though.

His hand rubbing your leg slides up to your thigh, high enough to brush against the hem of your shorts with every caress. You tense up a little and Hyunjin begins to rub your arm. Chan moves your legs with his other hand so they’re side by side. He taps thrice on your thigh with his fingers and after this long with him, he doesn’t even have to say anything. You readjust yourself, shifting your hips to create a space between your thighs for him.

Chan resumes caressing the inside of your thigh, his hand inching higher and higher each time until his fingers brush against your pussy. He rubs along your slit with his finger, and you try your very best to remain still. You don’t know if Hyunjin is in on this. If not, are you supposed to contain yourself? Chan must know you won’t be able to.

You keep still until he slips a finger inside and you involuntarily squirm against him. You feel Hyunjin’s hand pause its movement on your arm. You can’t bring yourself to look up at him.

Your uncertainties are answered when his hand leaves your arm and dips beneath the blanket. He slips it beneath your sweatshirt, up your stomach and to your breasts.

Your head snaps up to look at him.

“No?” He asks innocently, and even Chan freezes his movements.

You don’t know if your shock stems from the fact that Hyunjin must be in on this too, or the idea of what is actually happening. This is something you have never done before, but you can’t deny that you want to. You’ve experienced them separately and here they are, offering you both of them simultaneously. And, apparently, giving you the choice to proceed or not.

Seeing the contemplative look in your eyes, Hyunjin begins to knead your breasts. Your eyes flutter shut as you allow yourself to focus on only what you’re feeling. His long, slender hands handle your breasts with a remembered ease. He divides his attention between both of them and you feel the familiar shockwaves sending tingles straight to the nerves of your clit. You clench your pussy around Chan’s finger and slowly open your eyes as you nod.

Being with two men at once is not something you had ever considered before…but where else could you try it safely besides here?

You lean back against Hyunjin and Chan continues slipping his finger in and out of your moistening pussy. Having both of them touching you has your brain on the fritz again.

“Take his cock out,” Chan speaks a command you never thought you’d hear.

Under his direction, you don’t think twice about lifting yourself up to push down Hyunjin’s pants. He lifts his hips, and you slide them down along with his boxers, freeing his cock. It springs up towards you. You take delight at the sight of it, already hard for you while Chan’s fingers continue to slowly pump in and out of your pussy. Is Chan hard too?

You lick your lips, hesitating on your next move.

You glance back at Chan who gives you a quick nod. You then turn to look up at Hyunjin.

“Ours.” His tone and that word are all that you need to help settle your spiking emotions.

Even though his statement directly opposes what you told Chan earlier, Hyunjin is correct. You belong to them both. They can enjoy you together. And you them. However, it’s not lost on you that Chan seems to be calling the shots.

You readjust your body once more and grip the base of Hyunjin’s cock, his hands still fondling your breasts beneath your sweatshirt. You lower your head towards his pulsating member and take it in your mouth. You hear a groan and honestly, you’re not sure which of them it came from.

You feel Chan’s cock twitch beneath your legs on his lap. For a brief moment you wonder if someone might try to come down to the basement and catch you all in quite a predicament. Everyone that’s home, though, seemed preoccupied themselves. And this is the SKZ house, after all. It probably would not be a first.

You begin to bob your head up and down on Hyunjin’s cock as you rock your hips against Chan’s fingers. You’re unable to fully wrap your head around what is happening so you try not to think about it any further, or anything else for that matter. You want to focus on what you’re feeling—pleasing and being pleased at the same time.

You let out a muffled moan as Chan’s thumb finds your clit. He applies gentle pressure and rubs it in circles. You continue to moan around Hyunjin’s cock and the sounds of your pleasure must set Chan off. In the next instant he withdraws his fingers and moves the blanket off you. He grabs you by the hips and pulls you up so you’re on your knees. He yanks down your shorts and palms your ass as you arch your back and stick it out towards him even more.

The change in position allows him better access to you, and you to Hyunjin. Hyunjin adjusts his hands, placing one on the back of your head while the other continues to grope your breasts.

Chan then turns sideways, resting one leg on the couch. He spreads your cheeks apart and then his mouth is all over your pussy while you greedily gobble Hyunjin’s cock. Chan alternates licking between your folds, fucking you with his tongue, and slurping your juices.

You grip the base of Hyunjin’s cock and stroke him as you lift your head for air. His hand moves to your neck, and he uses a finger to turn your head to face him. He leans forward to kiss you. You squeeze your eyes shut as you kiss him back, the sounds that escape your lips are something between a moan and whimper. Your hips are circling against Chan’s face of their own accord, your hand stroking Hyunjin, your tongue in his mouth. You feel like you could lose it.

You break the kiss.

“You feel good?” Hyunjin asks with a sly smile, tugging on your nipple beneath your sweatshirt.

“Too good,” you say. The wanton expression on your face reveals just how good you feel.

“I told you she’d like it,” he says to Chan.

Your head spins at his words. This was Hyunjin’s idea?

“Of course she does.” Chan pulls his face away from your pussy to respond.

You take your hand off Hyunjin’s cock and move away from Chan’s touch too. Your mind is racing, wondering when this was planned. Before you came back home? After you went upstairs? You truly thought that this had to of been Chan’s idea. If they were both in on this, you don’t want to feel like a complete bystander the entire time.

You’re on your knees still, but now fully upright when you look over to Chan.

“Take your pants off,” you tell him.

“Oh, she’s getting into it,” Hyunjin remarks with a light chuckle. You turn to him and silence his laughter with one look.

“And your shirts. Both of you.”

While they remove their clothing you maneuver the blanket so it’s under you and remove your own top before sitting down. You place a hand on each of their thighs, pulling on them until they both get the hint to slide closer to you. You bring your right hand to your mouth, spit on it, then place it on Chan’s cock. You do the same with your left for Hyunjin.

It gives you great satisfaction to see both of their heads hit the back of the couch as you start stroking them in sync. It’s nice to silence them after their smart comments.

Hyunjin’s hand is on you again, caressing up your side, past your ribs and over to your breasts. You turn to your left to kiss him and as you do, Chan lifts your right leg and drapes it between his. His hand, like a magnet, is on your pussy again, rubbing your clit with his fingers. You drape your left leg across Hyunjin, spreading yourself wide open between them.

You break the kiss with Hyunjin and turn to Chan. You lean towards him, slightly, and when he moves to meet you the rest of the way, you duck your head down to put your mouth on his cock. He grunts, placing his hand on the back of your head to force you down on him. You keep stroking Hyunjin with your left hand as your right hand and mouth work on Chan.

“Fuck, y/n. Your mouth feels fucking amazing,” Chan tells you.

You’d smile at that if your mouth wasn’t full of his cock.

You lift your head and move over to your left—Hyunjin’s turn again. You stroke him and bob your head up and down. You’re thankful to have this task, alternating back and forth between licking, sucking, and stroking their cocks to slightly distract you from the feeling of Hyunjin’s hands on your breasts and Chan’s on your pussy. You’d surely have flown off the rails by now without it.

You feel a hand on the back of your neck, but you don’t know who’s it is. It squeezes gently and pulls you upright. It moves to the front of your neck and pushes you back against the couch. You keep your hands gripped firmly around each of their cocks, switching up your pace from fast to slow. You slide your hands up to their tips, smearing around the clear liquid oozing out of them.

You look down to see that it’s Chan’s hand around your throat. Hyunjin’s hand replaces his on your pussy and you slide down on the couch a little, giving him room to enter you.

“Kiss me,” Chan breathes into your ear.

Your head snaps in his direction and you have no time to even think about the fluids you’re all swapping. Your lips are on his, his hand still gripping your throat as Hyunjin fucks you with his fingers. Hyunjin leans towards you from the other side, kissing, nipping, biting your neck. You keep stroking them both, adding more spit as needed. Your hips move back and forth rapidly against Hyunjin’s fingers while Chan uses his other hand to rub your clit.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” you pant between kissing Chan.

“Yeah?” He keeps your head pressed back against the couch.

“Yes, yes,” you reply.

Hyunjin’s other hand goes to your breasts again, pinching and pulling at your nipples. Your body begins to shake as you cry out for more.

“You gonna come for us?” Chan asks, slowing his movements against your clit to tease you.

You look him in the eye as you nod.

“Tell me what you are,” he demands, picking up the pace of his fingers.

You open your mouth to respond, but don’t know what answer he’s looking for. He slows his fingers down again, to which you pout. Does he want to hear that you’re his? Or theirs?

“Look at you,” he says. He uses his hand on your neck to guide your head, showing you where to look.

The three of you are all tangled together. Your hands on them, their hands in you, on you, choking you, pinching you.

Hyunjin’s mouth moves to your ear, nibbling on your lobe before whispering two words.

“Our slut.”

Chan turns your head back to him before you can even get caught up in the semantics of what Hyunjin has just said.

“Respectfully,” Chan adds with a stern look.

The word absolutely has negative connotations but here, with them, you know they don’t mean it as an insult. Considering your current predicament, you can even agree with their use of the word. But because it’s them, because you know them, you know how they feel for you—it feels shockingly endearing to hear.

“Say it,” Chan commands, moving his fingers rapidly against your clit again as Hyunjin presses harder against the walls of your pussy, each time he withdraws his fingers.

Hyunjin replaces his fingers on your nipple with his mouth, sucking on it.

“I’m—I’m—oh, fuck—” you can’t form a simple sentence between your whimpering and moaning.

Chan forces your head back against the couch once more, squeezing tighter around your throat. You feel like your entire body could fucking explode. You grit your teeth together, focusing the few remaining active brain cells you have left to speak.

“I’m your slut,” you manage to eke out.

Chan groans at this and covers your mouth with his again. Hyunjin bites down on your nipple and that, combined with Chan’s tongue greedily invading your mouth sends you flying off the top of Mount fucking Everest with no parachute.

Your hands, still gripped around their cocks, stop their movements as you give way to an earth-shattering orgasm. Your body thrashes around as you whine into Chan’s mouth. They don’t stop touching you, even as the spasms subside.

When you finally open your eyes, the world around you feels like a blur, but you’re still very much aware of the two men beside you, now gently caressing your body.

They don’t give you much time to recover.

“He’s gonna fuck you now,” Chan announces.  

Your legs feel weak and your thighs quiver as you try to bring them back together. As much as you’d like a reprieve, your greediness for them is more prevalent.

Hyunjin slips off the couch and gets on his knees on the floor. He slides you down too, then turns you around. Chan moves over so your upper body is between his legs. He’s stroking his cock as he watches Hyunjin handle you.

Hyunjin pulls you back by your hips until your ass and thighs are pressed against him, letting you feel his cock as it gets hard again. He caresses your ass, then up your back before slowly pushing you down. You have nowhere to look but Chan.

That’s not a complaint, though. He’s the very essence of confidence seated in front of you, hand on his cock. Your eyes trail down from his, past his muscular shoulders and ripped abdomen to his cock, eyeing it hungrily.

You sway your hips from side to side until Hyunjin holds you in place and you whine in protest. You need one of them inside. Somehow, someway. His grip on you is tight as he starts to tease your slit, spreading your slick all around. You move Chan’s hand out of the way to take over stroking him.

“Wait,” he says, hooking a finger under your chin to bring your eyes back to him.

His gaze flickers up to Hyunjin and he gives a curt nod before looking back down at you. You feel the tip of Hyunjin’s cock at your opening and your first instinct is to close your eyes and drop your head.

“Look at me,” Chan orders.

You keep your eyes locked on him, biting your lower lip as Hyunjin, at a painstakingly slow rate, enters you. A moan escapes your lips when he’s finally buried in, to the hilt. He pulls out just as slowly, then thrusts forward with force, the sound of his thighs hitting yours is loud in the quiet basement.

Chan drops his finger from your chin, and you position your mouth over his cock. You spit on it, then work your hand around it to lather it up before gripping at the base and stroking him while Hyunjin fucks you from behind. You press the tip of Chan’s cock to your lips. You kiss it, then smack it against your lips a couple times, making him groan.

“Stick your tongue out,” he says, reaching up to take out your hair tie and let your hair fall around your face. “And keep doing that.”

You open your mouth, stick out your tongue, and do as you’re told.

“Fuck,” he tangles his hands in your hair. When he has a good grip, he forces your head down onto him. All. The. Way. You relax your jaw and tongue and breathe through your nose to accommodate the abrupt invasion.

Hyunjin delivers a smack to your ass as he plows into you, and you moan around Chan’s cock.

“Do that again,” Chan tells him.

Hyunjin grunts, rubbing your ass before smacking it again, harder than the first time. The sounds you make are muffled, with Chan’s cock in your mouth, but he can feel the vibrations.

“You’re so fucking wet,” Hyunjin says as he completely pulls out of you. He rubs the tip of his cock against your dripping pussy. “You like fucking us both, jagiya?”

Chan slightly releases his grip on your hair, allowing you to lift your head. His cock falls from your mouth, and it’s coated in your saliva, as is your chin.

“I do,” you admit. You couldn’t lie if you wanted to. “I really do.”

You resume stroking Chan with one hand while the other slides up his torso and across his abs. You lower your mouth back onto him, sucking and stroking in unison as Hyunjin slams back into you. The motions from Hyunjin’s deep and fast strokes help move your mouth on Chan’s cock.

“Shit—y/n, slow down,” Chan gasps suddenly. He uses his hands in your hair to try and pull you away. You shake your head, mouth still wrapped around his cock. You look him dead in the eyes as you start moving your hips to fuck Hyunjin back. They both made you crumble. Now it’s their turn.

“Fuck me harder, Hyunjin,” you say, holding Chan’s cock at an angle to lick up the shaft from base to tip, keeping your eyes on his.

“I’m gonna come, jagiya,” Hyunjin moans from behind you, pounding into you even harder.

“Please,” you reply. And you don’t know what comes over you with the words that fly out of your mouth next. “Fill up your little fucking slut. Both of you.”

Hyunjin grunts, his breath coming out in spurts as he comes.

“My fucking God,” Chan groans.

You put your mouth back on his cock and his hands fall from your hair. He leans back against the couch, resigned to letting you continue as he watches with a clenched jaw, shaking his head, but he doesn’t break eye contact either as he comes in your mouth.

You keep sucking his cock and rocking your hips back against Hyunjin.

Hyunjin is the first to pull away after he’s finished spilling himself inside your pussy. He withdraws himself completely. When Chan’s body finishes jerking, you slide your mouth off him.

“Show me,” he says.

You open your mouth to show him.

“Good girl. Swallow.”

You close your mouth and gulp down his fluids.

In the next instant he slides to the edge of the couch and pulls you against him, kissing you. It’s a hard, but simple kiss. When he pulls back, his brown eyes are filled with an emotion you can’t put a name to. A soft smile spreads across his face as he leans his forehead against yours.

“I told you I can share,” he whispers quietly enough for only you to hear.

He leans back against the couch then jerks his head towards Hyunjin. You turn around to see him splayed out on the ground, catching his breath. You let out a laugh and crawl over to him. He turns his head to you.

“Who are you even?” he asks, exasperated.

You lower yourself down to kiss him, just as hard as Chan had kissed you. Hyunjin moans, grabbing the back of your head to hold you against him as his tongue slips past your lips, his tongue swirling around yours. You relax into the kiss. Not a few hours ago you would have been concerned about kissing him like this after everything that has just transpired, but not anymore. You’re theirs just as much as they are yours. For now.

After wiping yourselves down, the three of you end up pulling the pillows down from the couch onto the floor and use the other spare blankets to make a pallet to lay on top of. You lay in the middle of Chan and Hyunjin but at some point, end up cuddled up to Hyunjin. He’s truthfully the better snuggler. You don’t know when you fell asleep but when you open your eyes again, you don’t even know what time it is. There’s a new movie playing, and a hand has crept between your thighs.

You lift your head from Hyunjin’s chest to see he’s still sleeping. You turn to look over your shoulder and see Chan wide awake, looking at you. He grabs your hand and brings it to his cock. It’s hard, and a look of need is ablaze in his eyes.

“You’re insatiable,” you whisper, rolling over towards him.

“I didn’t have enough,” he whispers back. “I need to fuck you, too, y/n.”

He sits up, with his back against the couch and pulls you onto him. He brings his hand to his mouth to spit on before rubbing it against your pussy, then around his dick. He lowers you down on to him and lets out a long sigh. You wrap your arms around his shoulders and press your bare chest against his.

He quietly fucks you. Very little is said. You’re not surprised by how quickly you become wet for him and start fucking him back.

Even with a comatose Hyunjin next to you, this doesn’t feel as awkward as you may have once assumed. It doesn’t feel sneaky, doesn’t feel like cheating. They both can have you whenever they want, and you them.

a/n: 10 pages in the word doc of pure smut for you guys. how was it?

since the tag list has not been working, i created a mailing list so i can email those of you who want to know when the chapter is being posted. if you'd like to sign up, click the link below. the email may initially go to your spam folder, it will be coming from writeonwhiskey@214560374.mailchimpapp.com. not spam, just me :)

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