Pa-siren - Lauren - Tumblr Blog
I could take every witch in the MCU (not in a fight)






Hold the fuck up, this isnât a real trial.
In retrospect a number of things about the episode, especially the coven's characterisation felt off... and now on rewatch I'm pretty certain this isn't a trial of the Road at all â it's the Salem Seven punishing Agatha.
Clues under the cut with some spoilers from future scenes in trailers / promo clips.
Clue #1 â No screen aspect ratio change
As @wolfcracker points out, for the two previous trials the screen ratio changed once they entered the place (going full screen). We didn't get that for this cabin.
Clue #2 â No phase of the moon decoration at the entrance

We've had these obviously built into the previous trial entrances but there's no sign of one for this cabin.

The coven's so panicked getting chased by the locusts they don't notice it running in. The door is made of wooden planks with tiny gaps in between and you don't see a sign of any moon on the other side either.

Notably, in a trailer and promo shot, you see the moon featured prominently again for an upcoming trial, when Agatha and Billy cross a stone bridge structure and approach an entrance (presumably of the tower).

Clue #3 â Each trial has an element, this cabin doesn't
This was something that seemed odd even before this episode, we saw five weird horror movie-trope settings â assumed to be trials â in posters and promotional materials but there are only four identified elements for the Road.
Sure you could have more moon phases (like we do irl) but the Ballad that is central the show only mentions four elements: fire, water, earth, and air.
Our first two trials had strong ties with an element: if you failed you'd be killed by that element or something associated with it i.e. drowning or burning.
Now from the promos, an upcoming trial with the anti-gravity effect going on in a tower fits well with the air element. And the threat of death here is associated with going into the air (spikes in the ceiling).

Notice from the flying forms that this trial does go full-frame like the first two we certainly had (clue #1).
Another upcoming trial we know of (that looks like a morgue or asylum-like place) can be linked with the earth given that we see rocks and earth falling in a shot. Death by crushing earth.

This cabin had no element associated with it at all. The threat of death was by... Agatha siphoning your magic? Or in the case of Agatha, to be tortured forever by her mom?
Clue #4 â The trial area doesn't necessarily keep out the Salem Seven
From the promo shots of presumably the air trial (see above), we clearly see the Salem Seven in the tower attacking them. Why then did Locust and the rest of the Seven leave them alone in the cabin when they were right behind them?
Other sus elements
OK, these are more ambiguous and could be the result of bad writing but here's the other stuff in this "trial" that just seems off
The coven turns really really quickly on Agatha and viciously. And they literally just rode broomsticks where it's mentioned it's "about selflessness" and "we fly together or not at all". I mean yeah the people might lie but they were enough of a team that the magic for the broomsticks worked.
Rio declares that it's Agatha's trial really quickly. Their only clue is that they see a blood moon and Agatha's killed lots of people. And why of all people is Rio snarking about Agatha putting people in the grave? That was their thing.
The trial's instruction was to just "punish Agatha"? That's oddly specific and pointed. Between this and the above point it feels like someone is mad at Agatha for killing lots of witches over the years. Some people like the Salem Seven.
The trials so far have tested the witch's ability in the craft (potion-making, protection) and how they work together. How does punishing or sacrificing Agatha align with the Road's test of "Burn and brew with coven true / And glory shall be thine" -- which we were just reminded of last week.
Jen calling and dismissing Billy as a familiar is... more mean-ness that I'd expect. You could make a case for her disliking Agatha, but the amount of venom in this moment towards the boy for trying is surprising considering she was trying to watch out for him not too long ago. Of course, it could be her frustration and fear in that moment boiling over.
Pretty much everything at the end after Billy snapping and going all dark and vengeful.
Ultimately we don't know what the Salem Seven can do. Sure they shriek like NazgĂťl but turning into animals isn't the most threatening thing? So, bad writing and copium or is this show being truly tricksy and reality-bending?

Shes a girlboss. She's a sopping wet cat of a woman. She's 350 years old and one of the most powerful witches that ever lived. She gets all her magic taken away by a slightly more powerful ginger who needs therapy. She makes said ginger relive her trauma and quips about it. She has major mommy issues. She serves serious cunt. She's even a lesbian.
how i look at you after saying something incomprehensible

Also it's important to me that it was specifically Alice who acted to blast Evanora out of Agatha.
Alice, who has spent her entire life believing her mother was crazy and her magic wasn't real.
Alice, who just found out that her mother cooked a protection spell into her most popular song so that Alice would be protected from a generational curse.
Alice, who just followed her mom's advice and was made free of that curse.
Alice, who was told all of this by Agatha.
Alice, who has just been connected to her mother's love for her who sees Agatha's mother say she should have killed Agatha the moment she was born and continue to be the worst possible person and refuse to let her travel the Road to get what she needs and possessing her to attack everyone else.
Alice, who jumps in and says enough is enough.
Alice, who dies for it.
Hi besties I have finished the last chapter of my Primal Agatha in the woods fic, I hope you all enjoy!
My Therapist: "Are you Okay?"
Me constantly 24/7:

Agatha not being able to control her power is fucking heartbreaking.
Imagine how she finds out she has this power, that she can drain the power (and the life) of people so much stronger than she is.
How desperate she must have been to learn to control it. She had to break the rules to find magic strong enough to help her.
How her mother and coven tried to kill her for trying to learn control, because they felt she never should have learned anything at all.

yea mood



#the lesbian gaze
AGATHA ALL ALONG 1.05 -Â Darkest Hour Wake Thy Power
Do you think Kathryn Hahn knew the second Agatha opened the door to the witchesâ road with her new BFF coven and surrogate son â only to be joined by her ex-wife â that an army of witchy gays would suddenly feel alive again and crawl out of the woodwork to watch a Marvel series? Because that happened. For real.
âWhy do you hate me still?â -Agatha talking to her mother
I want you all to know first hand that I would burn cities to the GROUND and dance on the ashes for Agatha to never sound so sad again
count your mf days Wiccan
WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ONNNNNN
Imagine yourself on a centuries long situationship with THE actual death and she's so in love with you and love your homicidal tendencies of your own kin and take them as gifts and even when she takes your son you can't stop loving her but can't quite forgive her for it as well, oh agathario you were born to be sapphic royalty
6 hours until Agatha I canât contain my self

THE COVEN + EP 4 TWITTER POSTS
iâm going insaneeee
MARVEL RELEASE PICTURES OF AGATHAâS ENCHANTED STRAPâ WE KNOW YOU HAVE IT, GIVE THE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT.


wdym this isnât what happened in ep 1???


Thatâs a married couple right there I donât know what to tell you
soft love, hard sex
Jac Schaeffer on Agathario Fight Scene
âWhen we first see them together as their true selves in that fight, itâs all fun and games. Itâs hair pulling and scratching and knives and sexiness, but thereâs real pain and real yearning.â
JAC I HOPE YOU SLEEP ON THE COLD SIDE OF YOUR PILLOW EVERY NIGHT.



SO MY FRIEND FOUND NEW KATHRYN PICS AND UHHH đłđłđł