Palindrome969 - Lily & Larkspur - Tumblr Blog

I'd be a slut for 3racha too

Who ever said fours a crowd?

3Racha X reader

word count:6,400

Summary: You & your boyfriend, Changbin, have both just started dating & he brings up the idea of inviting his long time & your long time friend, Chris, into the bedroom to help teach him how to pleasure you just right, since he was still a bit 'new' to sex, but you all forgot Jisung, their roommate, is also home.

18+,MDNI! smut below the cut.

©ANY translation, copy & paste, posting of my work is strictly forbidden for ANY posts/ writing i post.

main masterlist here

->SMUT WARNINGS: mxmxmxf, mxm, frottage( mxm), mentions of past encounters, PIV, oral (f rec), manhandling(??), praise, protected sex, unprotected sex, cum eating, multiple orgasms, size kink, anal play (m rec), anal(m rec) reader has a WAPPP, shy binnie, fingering(f rec), perv!Jisung, nipple/tit play, spit, Binnie is insecure at the start but reader doubles down & calms him down, mentions of a second round<3

->What better way to thank you all for 1K, 1.1K ANNND 1.2K followers than to do a 3racha smut? But seriously thank you so much, I haven't even been posting on here for 8 whole months & despite so many breaks in between you've all been so patient with me so thank you thank you thank you<3

You have been talking to Changbin for over an hour by this point in his shared apartment's living room, trying to figure out some boundaries, the reason for this being because you were both making out while a random movie was playing & you took it upon yourself to try take it a bit.. further, as your hand moves down to cup over his bulge, before the poor baby squirmed away from you, leaving you confused.

"It's not that I don't want it, I do! I just, I'm scared in case I won't be good at it, I've only slept with two people four times & I like you too much to disappoint you in case you don't like it" he murmurs, sounding embarrassed of what he had just said, avoiding to look at you sitting against the arm of the couch, playing with a loose thread attached to a couch cushion.

"Binnie, we don't need to do anything I'm more than happy to wait, but don't think of yourself like that, you're being silly, is there anything I can do to make you more comfortable? cmere" you respond, pulling him towards you anyways until he shuffles himself forwards on the couch so both of your crossed legs knees are touching.

“It’s not a you problem so no there’s nothing you can do to make me any more comfortable, i’m just too nervous, i feel like i need someone to show me how to do it or something, wanna be good for you” he whimpers as he pulls you into him, his back landing on the sitting part of the couch & you landing on top of him & you cup his puffy cheeks in your hands.

"Binnie I wouldn't judge you for it, I've felt your cock before & I know you'd be just fine, promise! Why n-" you cut yourself off when the front door to your boyfriends apartment opens, his best friend of years & a now close-ish friend of your own, Chan.

"Ah, heya you two, why do you both look like you've seen a ghost, what's up?" he says as he tosses his backpack on the floor beside the messy, cluttered shoe rack & it's only when he says this you process how shocked you must look to have seen him, Changbin looking a bit startled too.

"Hi chan, you just gave us a fri-" "Hyung, we were both just talking about something n I wanna ask you something!" Changbin says, cutting you off, turning his body on the couch to look behind him enough to properly look at who he's talking to, & Chan just nods as he walks over & slumps himself on the couch, next to changbin as he angles himself so he can look at you both at the same time before crossing his legs.

"Okay so, I wanted to know if you'd, help me with something Hyung" he goes on & if you looked like you'd seen a ghost before, it must look like you've been placed in the centre of a haunted house at this point. You open your mouth to speak but Chan beats you to it by telling him to continue.

"Okay, so, Ah I don't know how to ask!" he tries to joke to shake off his nerves, before continuing on. "Me & y/n were talking pretty much, & we both already know that with our schedule it's almost impossible to have time for people & also, sex? & I don't wanna disappoint y/n with my.. lack of experience, so to speak & I don't want my first experience with her to be better than just good, so I want you to help us" he blabs out, his voice sounding 'normal' on surface level, but you & chan know he is exploding with nerves.

Chan looks at him & then at you with surprise, not really knowing how to react, 'if i say yes straight away will I look desperate?' 'what if this is just a prank?' races through his head multiple times & words semi permanently die in his throat.

"The offer is only there if y/n is okay with it too though! If it's a no, we can forget I even asked you, don't feel pressured at all, just an idea." he says to chan before turning to you & he rests his hand on your knee, caressing it, which helps calm yourself down & he offers you his cute, soft smile.

"Binnie, we really don't need to do this, stop getting into your own head, I don't want this to negatively affect you in any way." you finally speak up & Chan nods his head at your reply.

"It won't, I wouldn't offer or suggest it if it would, we really don't need to do it, it's all in your hands" he responds softly & you can't help but feel like he really is being 100% truthful, & of course he is, & you come to the conclusion that if he is ready to do all of this just to pleasure you right, you can't really not help out.

"Okay Bin, I'll do it, Only if you're also okay with it Chan, obviously, but also if you're okay with it Binnie, like.. fully okay" you speak & Binnie leans forward enough to take your hands, caressing those instead. "Of course i'm fine with it! What are your thoughts Hyung? If you don't wanna do it, it's completely fine, we can forget it ever happened" Changbin blabs, the both of you looking at Chan, his eyes already glued on you both.

"Lemme have a bit of a think about it & I'll come back to you a lot about it, it's a big thing to just say yes to" he replies before he stands back up & leans over to purposely mess up your boyfriends curly hair, chuckling to himself before he makes his way to his room, the dim, purple LED lights in your vision as you watch him close the door behind him.

***

It’s been a day since you, Changbin & Chan had that talk & in all honesty, it’s all you could think about. ‘Have you embarrassed yourself by saying yes so quick?’ ‘will changbin think differently of me for saying yes?’ ‘what if chan changes his mind & i look like a freak for agreeing without him agreeing’ are the three main things that race through your mind, no matter how much you try forget about it, it’s just impossible!

The guys are doing something in the studio at the minute, & you decide to try deep clean your boyfriend’s bedroom to take your mind off it.

You strip the bed, of course finding a pair of your underwear.. or two inside his pillowcase, but you don’t bother to even question it, honestly quite flattered that he is so nervous to do anything with you physically but doesn’t think twice about stealing your used panties to jerk off to.

You re-fold his messy clothes that have just been thrown into the drawers, not too many noticeable creases in them to the point you feel the need to iron them, before plopping yourself back on the now fresh sheeted bed, a bit worn out from all the work you’ve just done.

As if it could be called perfect timing.. or worst timing, you hear Chan & Changbin get back to the apartment & you quickly realise they sound completely like normal, giggling about stuff you don’t understand & you take a sigh of relief, thinking that it won’t be as awkward if & when you have to face Chan again.

They part ways as Changbin returns to his bedroom, his eyes widening slightly at the tidied room & he is quick to pretty much leap on top of you, pecking you all over your cheeks before holding his upper half with his arm muscles as he looks down at you, a hand of his on each side of your head, laying on the bed.

"Chan spoke to me by the way, he said he will help us, are you still okay with all of this? I don't wanna make you uncomfortable y/n & you can seriously tell me if you don't wanna do it, or if you have any doubts whatsoever we can just tell him we changed our mind, If i have to force myself to man up, i'll do it." he murmurs, a bit shy in what he says, not usually being so forward with you unless it's just flirting, his chubby cheeks flushed red & his hair still a bit damp above you with sweat from the gym not too long prior.

You are honestly surprised at the fact Chan actually said yes, especially with how long it took for him to come to a conclusion, not that you were rushing him in any way, but you mostly thought that because you hadn't heard anything, it would have been a no.

"It's fine Binnie, I haven't changed my mind, but I still want you to be involved, I don't wanna fuck another man in front of you & you not doing anything." you suggest, but it's not really a 'suggestion' & it will only happen if he is involved, your mind is completely made up about it & Changbin is quick to nod at your words.

"I was planning on that anyway! I don't wanna be a complete cuck y/nnie I still need to be taught!" He pouts before lightly knocking on your shoulder in the same way you notice he loves to hit his members when he's happy or flustered before he nuzzles himself in your neck, not caring that he is pretty much inhaling your hair, the faint smell of the shampoo he also uses coating the strands.

"So uh, when does he.. wanna do it?" you ask, taking the time to rake your fingers through his curly & slightly frizzy hair & Changbin leans into your touch, tensing when your fingers hit his sweet spot.

"He said to just tell him when we want it, why, you want it that bad?" he teases you & you jokingly push him off of you & he can't help but giggle.

"it's not like that Bin! Just wanna see you & also it makes sense to kinda.. do it now-ish? because Jisung is gone so there's more privacy & Jisung is usually glued to Chan's hip if not Minho's!" you murmur, your ears burning red as you avoid his eyes with your own as you then flip onto your stomach & your legs sway slowly back & forth as you reach to play with Changbin's poodle hair.

"That's true, do you want me to get him like... now? I don't know how to go around this, should I let you shower or something first if you want?" Changbin suggests, pulling you into him, hugging you & you move your head to give him a peck on the nose before eskimo kissing him, which makes you both giggle.

"I showered earlier, I don't know what to do either, we can just go with the flow mkay? It's Chan who's joining us, not the other way around so we have the power in our hands, if we don't like it or change our minds i'm positive he won't mind." you respond & Changbin nods beneath you.

"You're right, I'ma go get him, mkay? It only goes as far as you want it to, so don't be scared to tell Chan no!" he says as he wriggles from you & blowing a kiss to you which you pretend to catch before he leaves the room & you can't help but chew the inside of your cheek with anxiety.

A couple of minutes later, Chan is trailing in behind your boyfriend & he is wearing a lot comfier of an outfit than what you usually see him wearing to the gym, going for some plain grey sweatpants & a tank top & his wide shoulders & his big biceps that are so deliciously toned & the veins running up his arms, which you don't fail to miss.

Chan shuts the bedroom door behind him & Chan takes it upon himself to sit beside you on the bed, before signalling Changbin to sit on the opposite side, you now being sandwiched between them both.

"Okay so uh.. are you completely okay with all of this y/n? Don't be scared of hurting my feelings because trust me you won't, we just want everything to be completely clear." Chan speaks out, his australian accent decorating his voice which you can't help but take a lot more interest in now given what is going to take place.

"I'm sure, don't stress it, Binnie wants help & he trusts you to do that & besides, you're an attractive guy so why would I turn it down" you chuckle & Chan returns it, not being able to stop himself from blushing.

"So uh, Bin, what is it that you want me to 'teach' you?" he looks past you & over to your boyfriend, who is playing with a loyalty ring he bought you when he first asked you to be his girlfriend with his fingers.

"Uh, kinda.. everything? But I still need to be involved, y/n wants that." he says, a chirp in his voice as his hand tightens around yours & you smile at Chan, confirming his words & Chan nods.

"Okay, so what are your guys.. limits? Yes, no's & maybe's?" Chan questions, his voice trying to sound nonchalant but it's not hard to pick up on the fact he is probably even more nervous than you or Changbin are.

"Uhh, I can't really think of anything, oh wait, no cumming inside or wear a condom" you speak & Chan nods again, his eyes widening slightly, not expecting to have been having the opportunity to fuck you tonight.

"Okay, Changbin, I have condoms in my left side second drawer, can you go get me a condom?" he asks as he moves his hand to rest on your thigh & Changbin hums a yes response before leaving & Chan takes it upon himself to lean in & kiss you the second you look at him & both of your lips fall into place pretty much instantly.

You're quick to notice how soft his lips are around yours as he takes control of it, you get so lost in it you barely register the fact that your boyfriend had already made his way back into the room.

"You guys look hot together, I don't know if i should be extremely turned on or jealous" Changbin remarks, his dimples poking in his cheeks as he sits behind you this time before pulling you up the bed so you're sitting between his spread legs with your back against his chest & Chan is quick to follow, setting himself facing you between your own legs.

"Maybe you just have a kink for it, can see the edge of your cock under the side of your sweatpants" Chan replies, chuckling. "I can feel it too" you respond & Changbin tuts at your teasing, hiding his face in your neck as he starts kissing the soft skin, the faint smell of body wash still scenting it.

"So I'm right in saying you've obviously kissed before so I don't need to teach you both that, why not you try touching her, Bin? Watch." Chan says in a soft voice as he grabs one of Changbins hands that are resting on your waist & brings it up to your left tit over your clothes & Chan takes a hold of your right one & they both feel & then find your nipples from above your shirt & they both quickly notice you've not put a bra on & Chan subconsciously bites hit bottom lip, buzzing at the thought.

"Try twisting it like this, not too much but have a firm grip on it, rub your thumb over the bud, you can lick your fingers too, makes it nice n wet, can I lift your shirt y/n?" Chan asks, his other hand running along the hem of your... Changbin's shirt that you've stolen for yourself & you nod at his request.

"Bin, can you take it off for us?" he chirps, looking at the man behind you, who is looking not back at him, but instead down at Chan's fingers, following not only hi words but mirroring his actions, almost in a daze before he snaps out of it at the sudden question & nods his head rapidly & you raise your arms up to help your boyfriend strip you.

Your nipples stiffen up at the feel of the air around you all but you don't ponder on it as their fingers resume their place on your tits, & you melt into the touch as you lean further into Changbin, soaking yourself in the feeling, finding comfort in the rapid heart beats coming from his chest.

"Gonna go further now, alright?" chan speaks up & you nod your head, your eyes not bothering to open your eyes & you can feel your boyfriend nodding behind you, his fingers not stopping their actions on your hard bud.

Chan licks his fingers before bringing it back to your nipple before bringing his other hand to your skin, slowly dragging it down your naked stomach & waist, before bringing his hand to the waistband of your baggy shorts & Changbin takes the time to pat you on the cheek & when you open your eyes, Chan is looking up at you, nonverbally asking you if he can continue/

"Go on, please" you murmur as you spread your legs that tiny bit extra & Chan smirks up at you both before he makes quick work of removing your shorts completely, now leaving you completely nude now since you also so happen to have chose to not wear underwear & your legs quiver at the cold hair hitting your core, already dripping at this point, & Chan is quick to tell you how wet you are.

"Bin, come sit around here" Chan speaks & Changbin lets out a small whimper as he forces himself to detach himself from your nipple, which in his humble opinion, is probably the prettiest thing he has ever seen that isn't your face, but his opinion is quick to change when he crawls to sit himself down next to his friend as you help give them more room by shuffling upwards just enough so you can lay your head on the pillows.

You try to shut your legs, feeling awkward & shy at the two men staring at your naked cunt, clenching around nothing but Chan is quick to stop you from shutting them, holding them open.

"Keep em open pretty, look how wet you are, you're lucky Bin, gonna show you how to touch her & eat her, okay?" Chan speaks to Bin & when your eyes land on your boyfriend, you can tell how nervous he is & when he rests his hand on your knee, you stretch your arm to hold onto his.

"Speak Bin, just relax, it's just us, you need to focus if you wanna learn" he doubles down, tapping his friends arm, snapping him out of whatever trance he's in.

"Can't help but daydream, you're to pretty." not talking directly to Chan, but you instead & you hide your face in your arm.

"I know, like I just said you're real lucky, watch my hand mkay? You wanna tease a bit first, makes it more interesting." chan chirps as his fingers finish trailing down your skin, now landing on your outer lips of your cunt before he starts slowly spreading your wetness, not as if you'd even need it anyways since you're beyond gushing anyway & the sensation of his slightly calloused fingers dragging across your pussy but you physically twitch when his fingers finally directly land on your clit.

"Here's where the clit is, it's the easiest way to make a girl cum so make sure you actually remember where it is & find out, it's uncomfortable for the girl if you rub next to it, but don't do it too rough or hard because it's really sensitive, like this." Chan further continues as he starts visibly demonstrating as he speaks, his index & middle finger rubbing slow circles on your clit, making you whimper & both of their eyes shoot up to you at the sound, both of their cocks getting even harder if it was possible.

"You can tell if they actually feel good by their reactions, you can see her pussy clenching around nothing, do you know how to finger a girl Bin?" he asks, not bothering to let his eyes become unglued from your pussy, his fingers already drenched in your wetness.

"I've watched tutorials on pornhub & I've done it with the very few fucks i've had, i know how to" he stutters as he feels the need to bring his own fingers to your pussy, it looking far too inviting for him to keep his paws off & you instantly feel as if your skin is on fire.

Chan takes the opportunity to remove his fingers from your clit & you let out a whimper at the loss of contact as your hips try chase his fingers but it's short lived as your boyfriend's fingers take their place & start working at their own pace, different but not bad.

His fingers are a bit more clumsy than Chans despite him concentrating that tiny bit extra but your butterflies are intensified a billion times more by knowing it's him touching you & you can't stop yourself from looking down to look at the pretty boy in front of you playing with you like this & without him looking away from you, he leans down just enough so he can perfectly let a glob of spit land on your clit & you jolt.

"Binnie, want your tongue." you mumble, trying to keep your composure, nibbling on your bottom lip. "Wanna taste you" he replies, sounding more dazed than you are before he is moving his hand away from you & you quickly sit up & start tugging at his shirt & he quickly takes the hint & takes it off & you flop yourself backwards again as Changbin lays down between your legs, his face just centimetres away from your pussy, your wetness already causing a wet patch on the bedsheets.

Chan takes it upon himself to crawl up your frame & sits on the back of his knees before pinching a nipple with his right hand as he brings his left hand down to your cunt, pulling the skin upwards, exposing your already swollen clit just that tiny bit extra to help his friend.

Changbin takes a moment or two to just simply admire how gorgeous your pussy really is, & he has to mentally slap himself because of how long he's put off sex because of his own nerves, not knowing that literal perfection was so close to him.

Before he can doubt himself, he lets his lips suction onto your pudgy clit as he starts swirling his tongue around it & you instantly doubt the claim that he's bad at sex because he is acting like a natural.

"Fuck Bin, tongue is good" you whimper, your voice shaky as he slurps up your juices along with the pool of spit that's uncontrollably rolling off his tongue & your fingers weave into his curly hair.

"He making you feel good, babe?" Chan questions as he brushes the now damp hair from your face & he looks down at you with a cheeky smile, but you're too out of it to snap back at him, instead, you look down at his sweatpants that he's still wearing & you can easily see the huge boner he's sporting & you can't stop yourself from reaching to start pawing at them, & thankfully he takes the hint.

Chan takes his sweatpants off, leaving him in just his boxers. "Off cha, th-those too" you fight the words through your moans & but he does as you say & takes off his tank top too while he's at it, now totally naked too but instead of joining you both back on the bed, Chan is walking over to the bedroom door & opening it, & much to your shock, but not to chan or changbins, Jisung is standing right outside the door with his leaky cock in his hand, now frozen in place.

"I thought I heard you whining outside, we're busy & I thought you were with Leeknow?" Chan speaks, a complete monotone voice, almost as if he's not standing completely naked with his heavy, veiny cock in his hand.

"W-wanted to j-just listen, can I join? s-sounds pretty." he murmurs, his big boba eyes darting from you, to chan & then to changbin, just to repeat the motion over again & Changbin has detached his pretty lip from your clit, breaking the suction seal on your pussy before rubbing your clit with his fingers again, the feeling more intense with how sensitive his tongue has made it as you start grinding against him, unable to even think of a response to give Jisung.

"It's not my choice, it's y/nnies, but I don't think she's able to talk, I'm teaching Bin well, aren't I?" Chan asks, hinting a response for Bin & he let's himself enter not one but two fingers into your cunt before quickly setting a decent pace, his other hand's thumb flicking your clit at the same pace as best as he can.

"So well hyung, ask y/n it's her who to ask" Changbin chirps, his voice flushed out as he slows down the grinding on the mattress as he looks at the doorway & Jisung fixates his eyes on you, teary.

"Just c-come in -fuck bin, come in Jisung" you cry out & Jisung pretty much gallops into the room, past his naked friend & he pretty much hops onto the bed as he shakes his clothes off & chan makes quick work of following him, not bothering to shut the door behind him.

Changbin doesn't bother to ponder on the fact that Jisung is now here, instead completely focused on the way you're clenching around his chubby fingers, feeling your orgasm bubble up, it feeling different to when you're just masterbating on your own.

"Bin, think i-ima cum, so goodd" you squeak as you grip onto Jisungs arm beside you without thinking & Changbin's ego gets boosted by the words you spit out & he takes the chance to suckle back on your clit again, making sure to pull on the pudge of it to get better access, just like what Chan did & your legs convulse around his head as you try to force yourself to keep them open, but Jisung takes it upon himself to straddle you with his back facing you, holding your legs open, also giving himself a perfect view of his friends tongue & lips engulfing your pussy.

"Cum for us babe, if it feels good just let go" Chan remarks & you look up at him with glossy eyes, dazed & fucked out as you let out a squeal as you bubble over, your orgasm flushing throughout your entire body as your toes curl around him & your fingers clench so hard around his fingers he's force to pull them out, a white cream ring around the base of his fingers.

Jisung reaches down to grab at Changbin's wrist before pulling the fingers that just fucked you up to his mouth before licking your own orgasm off of them, groaning at the taste, his drool coating his fingers & he takes it upon himself to tease you all by gagging on his fingers but to not really anyones surprise, Changbin just looks up at him in awe, his fingers finally slowing down on your clit, letting you come down from your orgasm, which he learned to do from porn.

"Did so well for us y/nnie, do you wanna keep going? We can stop here if you're too worn out we can do this another day if it's too much, no stress." Chan speaks out as he pulls Jisung off of you & onto the place on the bed he just was, Jisung laying next to you now & he turns his head to give you a smile, which you mirror.

"Wanna keep going, want you Bin." you make grabby hands & Bin crawls up your frame to kiss you & that's when you feel that he still has his sweatpants on & he doesn't even need to be asked before he's taking them off along with his boxers, his thick cock hitting against his toned tummy, making you drool.

"Want to feel you so bad Bin, please binnie." you murmur as he holds himself above you before he leans down to kiss you, but you're both interrupted by the sounds of Jisung & Chan moaning beside you & when you turn to look, Chan has his own & Jisungs cock wrapped in his palms as they grind against each other, using their own precum as lube & with how wet their cocks are, they could give you a run for your money & you'd be lying if you said you aren't even more turned on now, Jisungs legs wrapped around Chans ripped frame as Chans thick cock almost hides Jisungs with the size difference as their sensitive tips bash & glide against one anothers.

You can feel Changbin freeze up a bit when you reach down to grip his cock with your hand when you try align it with your cunt & you reach to caress his cheek. "It's alright Binnie, you've already made me cum you're good!" you pretty much cheer, your voice soft & Chan can't help but overhear it & he has a bright idea.

"I'll guide you Bin, Jisung you're gonna help us, mkay?" Chan asks & Jisung already knows where it's going & he nods with stars in his eyes as he flips around so he's on his knees before dropping from his hands so he's arched, his already stretched hole on display for Chan & Changbin to see & you can't help but feel a bit left out that you can't see it from where you're laying down.

Changbin & you look over at the sight, honestly extremely surprised at how... comfortable they are to do this with one another.

"Are we missing something? Do you guys hook up & none of us knew this?" you giggle & Jisung lets out a pouty whine, turning his face away from you to avoid your gazes.

"There's nothing wrong with having fun on our own, like Changbin's said, being idols give us a horribly busy schedule!" he whips back at you as he makes quick work of grabbing the condom that Changbin collected earlier from the floor & he rips open the packet before rolling the condom onto his cock.

"it's easy Bin, promise. Everyone obviously has a G-spot & you need to try find it, it's more spongey but if you've felt it with your fingers, your cock will definitely reach it so don't stress, go in slow & then pick up the pace, & don't just have messy thrusts you gotta keep a rhythm" Chan instructs as he takes his own cock in his hand & aligns it up with Jisungs already lubed hole, from when he was actually prepping himself just before he started jerking off outside the door.

Changbin stumbles with his hands for a minute before he copies his hyung in the room, not only his heart but also your heart racing as he decides to beat Chan to the chase & he pushes himself inside you, the width of his cock a huge stretch to just his fingers, & Changbin stalls inside you half way, partly to let you adjust but also to stop himself from cumming on the spot with how tight & warm you are, the way you're clenching around him is suffocating in the best way possible.

Jisung looks at the reaction on your face & he can't wait any longer as he then starts shaking his ass on his dick, trying to persuade his hyung to just give him what he wants & Chan can't hold himself back any longer & slides himself in quite quickly, knowing Jisung loves the painful but pleasurable stretch from the roughness & he lets out a choked noise that makes you gush.

"Y-you're so tight jagi, oh my- oh my god" Changbin squeaks, his eyes struggling to not roll to the back of his head & you look up at him with love hearts in your eyes, your brain malfunctioning as you reach to hold onto his biceps that you love so much, the choked gurgles of Jisungs whines & squeals filling the room.

Changbin forces himself to piece his mind together again just enough to start fucking into you at a good pace & you're just so full you swear you can feel him coming out of your throat almost. "S-so big Bi-binnie, doing so good" you cry out & by this point you've genuinely forgot that your boyfriends two closest friends are literally fucking beside you & you won't be surprised if you dismiss the huge puddle of spit on the bedsheets as your own later.

Chan reaches down to start jerking off Jisung at the same pace as his cock is thrusting into him & literally just after a couple of pumps of his cock, he is cumming all over Changbin's bedsheets with a wail as he spasms & shakes beneath Chan, but he doesn't let up.

Chan takes a second to look at you & Changbin & deems his work as done in terms of getting him comfortable to fuck you, & he can tell you both need no more help & he scoops up Jisung & carries him by the inside of his knees, his back touching his chest as he takes them both out of the room to make way to whatever next surface he can fuck Jisung against, leaving just you & Binnie together, not that you could be paid to care at this point.

"Y-you're so pre-beautiful, so good" he babbles above you as he flops forward enough to kiss you, tongues wrapping around one another as he hits that gummy spot his fingers were rubbing against earlier & your whines jump up an octowave.

"Shit bin, wa-gonna cum, pl-please" you cry as you break the kiss to try catch a breath or two but you hold your breath in shock & happiness at Changbin's response.

"Cum, p-please, I- i love you jagi, ss-so much, so good" he gibbers as he brings his hand down to your clit again, rubbing more messy circles on your clit & your toes start curling but you force yourself to hold back your orgasm for the time being, as tense as a rock beneath him as squelching noises fill the room, his cock almost completely slipping out every time he retracts himself, your hand reaching own each time he does so just to make sure you can quickly slide him back into his probably new favourite place if it happened.

"I- love you too bin, prett-prettiest boy" you whimper & at those words matched with you then pulling his head from your neck once he nested it there & kiss him again with your hands cupping his chubby cheeks & he lets out a small squeal as he is cumming before he can warn you & at the feeling of him filling you up & the way he pulsates in you, your own orgasm hits you too & he accidentally bites down on it & you moan that extra bit louder at the feeling.

You both come down from your orgasm, panting & huffing on top of one another, only the sounds of Jisung being fucked by Chan just down the hallway, but your mind is too all over the place.

"I me-meant what I said by the way, sorry it took my friend to help me fuck you." he murmurs, his voice sounding raspy but chirpy.

"I meant it too, I looooveee you! & don't stress it, it was hot anyways." you emphasis it further by pecking him all over his face, his cute dimples plastered on his cheeks as he gets shy.

"I can still hear Chan & Jisung fucking, if you want we can go join them, since you think it's hot" he half teases, but you can tell he isn't really joking. "you'll need to climb off me if you want to go, hurry before Jisung is fully spent!" you snap back & you can feel his cock that was just starting to go limp inside you chub back up before he's pulling out as he picks you up & pretty much sprints to what turns out to be the living room & Jisung on his knees sucking Chan off & you're quick to land on your knees beside Jisung, poking your head in to get a taste as Changbin sits beside chan a Jisung switches places with you.

->I really don't think I like this im afraid</3 but I could potentially do a part two but it won't be until after kinktober & after i finish my part two to my felix smut so please be patient mwah x

->Taglist & anon list is open! @jisungml

"Case: It's You" Masterlist

Pairing: Detective Reader x ot8 detective ateez

Genre: enemies to lovers, romance, eventual smut, dark themes, angst.

Synopsis: As a headstrong detective- forced to transfer to another Precinct after pushing your team, and superiors too far- your new unit is less than pleased by your presence. In fact, they are down right hostile, resulting in more time butting heads than doing your job: taking down the organized crime 'gangs' of your city. Once you finally get your foot in the door, into their circle, you realize you bit off more than you can chew- or maybe it was the perfect place for you.

Current Word Count of all chapters combined: 66,406

Chapters:

One | Two | Three | Four | Five |

Six | Seven | Eight | Nine | Ten |

Eleven | Twelve | Thirteen | Fourteen | Fifteen |

♡15.5- Spinoff bonus |♡

Sixteen | Seventeen | Eighteen | Nineteen | Twenty |

Twenty-one | Twenty-two | Twenty-three | Twenty-four | Twenty-five |

Twenty-six | Twenty-seven | Twenty-eight | Twenty-nine | Thirty

If you would like to be added to the taglist, you can apply with this link: form

Big shoutout to my beta readers that are currently the soul motivation for this fic and remind me to edit: @flurrys-creativity @candypop1611 and @daemour

𝓢𝓹𝓮𝓬𝓲𝓪𝓵 𝓡𝓮𝓺𝓾𝓮𝓼𝓽 | 𝓚𝓲𝓶 𝓢𝓮𝓾𝓷𝓰𝓶𝓲𝓷 |

word count - 5,282

genre - smut (MINORS DNI!!!)

warnings - feminine terms, you/your pronouns, bsf! seungmin, cam girl! reader, mutual pining(?), seungmin spoils reader, swearing, sex toys, mentions of jacking off, orgasm denial, hand kink(?), dom!seungmin, sub!reader, pet names (good girl, darling, baby), pussy slapping, slight pet play, fingering, squirting, overstimulation, making out, marking, grinding, oral (m rec), face/throat fucking, dirty talk, begging, forced orgasm, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it), slight belly bulge, lmk if I missed anything

You weren’t entirely sure when you had told Seungmin about your job. 

But considering that you had kept it a secret for so long during your friendship, you couldn’t hold it back anymore when it was getting harder and harder to hide the lingerie from him, especially when he’d stay the night at your place.

You had a pretty tame set up, nothing too dramatic, however you had a completely different room for it, and Seungmin was starting to get suspicious when you’d cancel plans with him when a fan of yours wanted a private room with you. 

He sat you down, and made you talk.

-a few months ago-

“What’s going on? You keep canceling pre-made plans and make up some dramatic lie.” He watched your posture shift into a slouch as you sigh. You really couldn’t hide in anymore, could you? He had you cornered.

“Guess I really can’t hide it from you any longer, can I?” You huffed out, clearing your throat as you began to avoid eye contact, something you never really did with him.

“Well…?” He edged on, raising a brow at you.

“I’m a cam girl– more simply put I d–”

“I know what they are…” He almost immediately cut you off before you could start explaining. You watched him relax into the couch, looking at how nervous you seemed.

“Are you uncomfortable with that? At all? I mean you’re my best friend. I don't want you to think I’m like a slut or something..” You began to explain, and that made his brows furrow.

“Why would I think of you as a slut? It’s your life, Y/N. You get to choose what you do for a living, and if making money with your body is what you like doing, then so be it. I wouldn’t think of you any less.” He had such a sweet smile on his face, it made your heart melt from it.

-two weeks before-

Now he was buying you things. He bought your lingerie sets, sex toys you really wanted for some time now, and he’d even watch over and kick out any creeps that showed up, ones that were majorly disrespectful and didn’t respect your boundaries.

..But watching over your lives made him hornier than he thought he’d be. Instead of watching over the entire thing, he’d end up jacking off and trying to line up his release with yours as best as possible. 

Orgasm denial after orgasm denial is what he’d do with you all while kicking people. You would’ve never known though, seeing as he’d be doing this all at his own place. 

At one point he’d even made a second account just to send you money to send out a request. 

You’d follow those requests so well that sometimes he’d cum a little sooner than expected, and it made him cum hard.

He couldn’t take it anymore personally, but there wasn’t exactly anything he could do, after all he was just your best friend, there was no way in hell that you’d ever consider doing something with him on a live.

It was a personal struggle for him too, knowing that he wasn’t the one getting you off and instead it would be the toys he’d bought you a few days prior, he’d even resort to buying a fleshlight, imagining it was you on nights that you didn’t go live. 

At one point, he even started his own account, the main account he’d use to monitor your lives soon became what he would use to release his own stuff. He’d stay faceless for a while, doing audios, talking about wanting to do a collab with someone soon. He’d have plenty of views to be popular, and even told you right when he started.

At one point you even watched his lives and his videos, and it turned you on even more knowing that those moans he’d produce would be so delicious to hear in person.

You’d never ask him though, that made you feel embarrassed if he knew that you were watching his stuff. 

Some nights, you’d find yourself touching yourself to the sound of his voice, melting with every word he’d say.

-one week before-

You were doing a live show. Seungmin was monitoring on his second account, cock in hand as he watched you fuck yourself with a purple dildo, one that he had bought for you three weeks ago. 

It turned him on so much knowing that you were using toys that he had bought for you. He hand wrapped around his length as he pumped it in pace with your hip movements, and soon when his fist wouldn’t be enough, he’d break out the fleshlight, matching the pace. He watched as your hips grinded down on the dildo, a loud moan escaping when you’d reached your g-spot, and it made him groan and throw his head back, just before quickly snapping it back as he watched you make eye contact with the camera.

“I bet you’d love for this to be you, huh? Me riding your cock, makin’ you feel– hnghh– so good underneath me.. f-fuck..”

He couldn’t take it anymore, he needed you. He needed you so bad that he couldn’t help but finally make an undeniable request. He sent so much money you were sure that his second account was rich, considering you didn’t know it was him.

“Meongmeong00! Oh my god! Thank you so much for the 2,000 tokens! Oooo and it says right here you’ve made a request!” You didn’t get off the dildo, and instead you quickly opened the message, making sure you were still on screen the entire time.

You decided to not read the message out loud, not wanting to spoil it.

Meongmeong00: Your shows are always so good, but I’m looking for more. You should do a collab, have someone fuck you for a change. You should check out PuppyM, he’s a camboy but he only does audios.

“Mmmm I can’t promise you anything meongmeong, but I can most certainly try to get in contact.” While it was a bit worrying knowing that someone had suggested you do a collab with your best friend, you decided to ignore it and finish the live. 

You had some talking with Seungmin to do, and soon.

-the evening before-

“Min,, I have something to ask, and if you’re totally weirded out you can just say no.” You started off, the both of you sat on the couch, eating whatever snacks to your heart's content as you watched your show together.

Seungmin looked at you, raising an eyebrow as he hummed in response.

“So one of my biggest supporters, meongmeong00, made a request..”

He knew exactly where this was going, and on the inside he wanted to just admit his dirty tricks, but he didn’t want to spoil it, especially with the fact you looked so cute when you were nervous, “Go on..”

“They requested that PuppyM, or more so, you, should do a collab with me..” You pulled at the hem of your (his stolen) shirt, you getting all flushed from the idea of actually having sex with him.

“Did they? Wow.. who knew two worlds would collide.” He hummed out, his voice a bit raspy from being quiet almost the entire show. 

“Min I’m serious.” 

“Oh I know.”

“So what’s your answer..?”

“Sure why not. It’d rack in views for me and you, and I’d finally do a face reveal.”

You actually couldn’t believe your ears. He said yes?

“Really? Minnie you’re the best!” You squealed, hugging him, and in order to do that you had to straddle him. Within that action he grunted but hugged back nonetheless.

You hugged him for a while, thanking him over and over again. He’d only hum in response, head peeking from your shoulder as he watched the show behind you. He was thankful that you didn’t feel the semi he had.

-the day of-

You had planned everything, you had clarified boundaries, safeword, and even decided to use the light system. You just about agreed to anything that he suggested. 

Kissing, Marking, Overstimulation, Bondage, sensory play, praise, degrading, you name it. 

In true honesty you were more than excited. The entire time you had been out that day, you had a burning sensation in your abdomen. The desire was strong, and it made you so eager to go forward in time and make the clock strike 7 o’clock. 

You had gone all out for this. You had bought new lingerie, in his favorite color purple, just to tease him even more than you needed to. You did some light makeup, knowing it would just be ruined in the end anyway.

You made sure everything was perfect, that the camera was angled perfectly, and that the room was set to your liking. 

Seungmin went all out too, he decided to dress nice, which wasn’t exactly necessary but he still did it anyway. He wore a black button up, dress pants matching. The sleeves were rolled up to the elbows, his fingers were even decorated with a few rings. He knew that he’d end up taking pictures of you, so what better way to do that then use his hands and have rings make his hands look pretty. He had his hair pushed back as well, something you absolutely loved on him. 

Neither of you were thinking of roleplay, but the way he dressed up definitely made it seem like it. He even brought a collar and leash, something new you’d never used before. 

When he showed up, your breath had stopped seeing him all dressed up.

“Well look at you, all dressed up for me?” You teased, watching him kick his shoes off at the door before walking towards you.

“I could say the same for you,, what’s underneath that nightgown of yours?” He hummed out, a finger lifting the silk fabric of the nightgown, that same finger grazing your skin, causing shivers to run up your spine.

“Hm, you’ll see..” You hummed out, walking to the room he’d never been in before.

He wasn’t expecting it to be so nicely done. The best part was the amount of options you had for him. The ties, blindfold, the toys he bought for you, even two different types of whips and a paddle. You were decked out for him.

“You said you’d want options so I broke out every toy you’ve bought along with a couple of other things you might find interesting. Did you bring anything?” You asked, pointing towards his bag.

“Oh right.. I uhm, I’m not sure you’re into it but I was thinking maybe a bit of control?” He then pulled out a collar and leash, and you clenched around nothing.

“Yeah that’s fine, like breath play?”

“I was thinking–” He paused, setting down the collar and leash and walking towards you, leaning to your ear, “Maybe some pet play?” 

Oh fuck.

“Y-Yeah we can uhm.. We can do that.” You huffed out, swallowing thickly as you watched him move back, hum, and then get ready for you to start your live.

You were sitting on the bed, watching all of your viewers come in, some you didn’t recognize in which they all, no surprise, asked where PuppyM was.

“Welcome! I’m glad all of you could make it today!” You greeted, gently waving to the screen as you shifted so your legs were crossed. You watched donations slowly pour in, and you haven’t even done anything yet.

Seungmin watching this in real life made him nervous.

“As you remember, a few weeks ago, meongmeong00 made a request, and I didn’t tell you what they requested, but as you can tell from the title.. I’ve decided on a collab!” You hummed out, leaning forward just a bit, your cleavage making itself known in the process. You could hear Seungmin shift a bit, waiting for you to signal him to come in. He had grabbed the collar and leash beforehand too.

“So, without further ado, please welcome the one and only PuppyM!” You had let a hand reach out towards Seungmin, in which he came out from hiding, humming lightly as he stayed standing, watching you move your head upwards as he walked closer. The camera was angled perfectly to wear his head cut off, but that would be pointless very very soon. 

“Thank you for inviting me to your show tonight, Y/N.” He responded, in which you hummed in response as you felt him move your hair to put the collar on you. A smile was on your face as he looked down at you.

“Of course, the more the merrier am I right?” You added, to which he nodded before sitting down and looking at the camera.

“And now they get to see my face, too.” He watched the chat go crazy with the sudden face reveal, a smirk on his face.

“I think they seem to enjoy your face, Min.” You resorted to a simple nickname that would be easy to use.

“You think so? I agree.” He replied, watching you turn your head to him. How it was so tempting to just kiss you right now.

“Well, might as well put on a show..” You hummed out, standing up and teasingly lifting your nightgown off. Oh how his heart stopped.

Purple was such a beautiful color, especially with you wearing it. He could feel his mouth water as he sat and watched you drop your nightgown on the floor. 

“Wow.. Purples a pretty color on you, darling..” He hummed out, watching you walk to the side of the bed. He moved so he could meet you by the edge of the same side. 

Your hands rested on his thighs for a moment, leaning close to him, prepared to kiss him but he stopped you.

“Uh-uh.. Sit first.” He commanded, and you could feel your knees go weak at those words. 

You quickly straddled his lap, his hands going to your hips as you looked at him from above, “Good girl.” He hummed out, and you could feel yourself get wetter.

You went back to leaning in to kiss him, his eyes fluttering shut slowly but surely. Your lips soon connected with his, your hands reaching to tangle into his hair. It was just light foreplay and you already had a small wet patch on the lace panties.

The way his lips moved on yours, the heat from his body and yours connecting and creating a great sexual tension. You could hear his shaky breaths clear as day as you kissed, sucked, and nibbled on his bottom lip. 

One hand retreated from his hair, slowly guiding down to his pants where they were greeted with a bulge in his pants. Almost instinctively you started palming, but a single word prevented you from continuing.

“Stop. Did I give you permission?” He huffed out, pulling away from the kissing as he stared at you with dark eyes. You melted under his gaze almost immediately.

“Did I need permission?” You asked, a smirk on your face, and one soon grew on him.

“Snarky, aren’t we?” He muttered out, slapping your ass, and hard. You were sure there would be a mark left as you yelped and moaned, head thrown back.

“M-Min–” You whimpered, hand retreating from his bulge.

“Hm? What’s the matter? Can’t handle it?” He teased, gently rubbing the spot he hit on your ass.

“No– I can handle it–”

“Color?”

“Green.”

He carried on with his next action, one hand retreating from your hips to greet your aching clit. A finger rubbing in a circular motion almost immediately, causing you to gasp and let out a soft moan. You almost instinctively grinded down on his hand, but knowing that the result of moving your hand to his bulge, you stopped yourself.

“Such pretty moans.. Matches a pretty face doesn’t it? Don’t you guys agree? She has such pretty moans.” He teased, his eyes never leaving you. The chat was going wild with donations and comments. 

You kept moaning when he would change the pace of his finger before stopping, it would cause you to whine but when he picked up again it was cut off and you’d go back to moaning. 

This went on for a few minutes, the continuous torture of him teasing your clit and making you want more. 

By the time he stopped, your core was aching for everything and more.

“Please Min– I need it–”

“Why don’t we be patient, darling. You’ll get what you want soon, let me have some fun and prep you yeah? You need to be able to fit all of me in you if you want the night of your life..” He teased, both hands retreating as he unhooked your lace and very mesh bra. 

Being face to face with your tits was so much better than the screen, “So beautiful.. You’re perfect..” He muttered, a hand going to one of your tits, lightly squeezing it. 

You don’t know what turned you on, the praise of all of the touching he was doing. 

“Touch me more please..” You said loud enough for everyone watching to hear, but not loud enough for the neighbors to hear you.

“Where do you want me to touch you?” And before you could even respond, his lips wrapped around your nipple, causing you to gasp and let out a shuddered moan, hands going back to his hair. 

He’d continue to play with your nipples. Sucking, swirling, nibbling, and tugging on them. He was sure that they’d be swollen and with the way you were reacting, he could get off on just that. He turned to the other one, giving the same treatment. 

He knew you wanted more, but he loved the way you were reacting even from simple foreplay. 

“I haven’t even gotten to the good bit and you’re squirming and begging for more..” He hummed out, pulling away from your nipple before pressing a sweet kiss to your lips.

Soon enough though, your clothed pussy met his clothed cock, and you began grinding down on him. With that action, it caused a strained moan to release from his lips as he pulled away.

“Fuck..” He muttered out, head leaning back as he relished in the feeling.

“Feel good enough for you?” You teased, thumb tugging at his bottom lip. You knew he was enjoying just from the way his body would react. 

“Feels so good, darling.” He groaned out, looking back at you. Your cheeks were flushed, lips plump from all the kissing.

His head dipped into your neck, pressing kisses as he pushed your hips down harder on his, moans releasing from the both of you. If he could just hold out a little longer. 

He began to mark your clear skin, leaving plenty of love bites and hickeys on your collarbone and neck, “Mine, your mine.. No one else's jus’ mine.” He muttered against your skin, fingers digging into your hips and his grip was so tight you were sure there would be marks by tomorrow.

“ ‘M all yours Min– Just yours baby..” The both of you stopped because you knew it was time for a change and Seungmin was super needy at this point.

You quickly got off of his lap, hands going to his belt and taking it off for him, now getting on your knees, quickly unbuttoning and unzipping his pants. His hands quickly worked on his shirt, tossing it to the side once it was off, and you pulling his pants down. 

You swallowed at the hard on you could see much more clearer. Fuck he was big.. He was girthy and he was lengthy, “Holy shit Min..” You muttered, licking your lips. You knew that it would be bigger the moment it was out. 

You stood up to move the camera closer to the two of you, so the viewers could get a better sight of you, him, and his clothed cock.

“Do you guys see this? He’s huge!” You let out a scoff afterwards, a smug smirk on his face. 

“Why don’t you get a taste then?” Seungmin replied, hand going down to caress your cheek. You hummed as your fingers went underneath the waistband of his boxer briefs, now tugging them down and watching as his cock slapped against his abdomen. 

Your mouth watered, and you could feel some of it slipping from your lips.

“Careful, don’t drool all over me.” He joked, and you laughed as well, swallowing the spit and then letting some more form in your mouth. 

A long stripe is what you licked on the underside of his length, tongue flicking at his red tip. A sigh immersed from his lips as he watched you. He was more than certain you had practiced prior to this, and even looked at some tips because he definitely knew you never sucked off any of the dildos you had. 

He watched as you took him in your hands, getting him prepped to take him into your mouth. 

You wrapped your lips around his tip, swirling your tongue as you tasted the salty pre-cum on your tastebuds. You let spit trickle down from your mouth and down his length before you began to take him into your mouth, feeling him hit the back of your throat before you started forcing yourself down even more. 

He let out a broken moan feeling the warmth of your mouth. He could feel himself twitch as your moved your hand, jerking what you couldn’t reach as you lifted, eyes watering as a string of saliva connected your tongue with his dick. 

“Fuck this is a sight..” He muttered, hand going to your hair and you knew exactly what he was about to do.

“You can take more, right?” He hummed out, and you nodded in response.

“Color?”

“So fucking green Min.” You whined out, just before feeling him guide your head back to his length, making you take what you could at first, just before he began to buck his hips upwards, forcing you to take more. While it made you gag at first, you soon got used to the feeling of him entering and leaving your throat.

A hand went down to touch yourself, rubbing your clit in a circular motion as you let him fuck your throat.

Desperate moans and groans passed his lips, “Fuck– Baby your throat feels so good– jus a good girl for me– shit-” 

You hummed around him, causing a loud moan to escape from him. You knew that he wouldn’t last like this, and he knew too, but he kept going.

“Taking it like such a good girl, yeah? Taking me down your throat, I bet you enjoy it…” He certainly was a dirty talker.

He quickly pulled you off of his length after he felt himself get close. He looked at your fucked out face, the way mascara started streaming down your cheeks the moment he began to fuck into your throat, and the way that your face looked so red, all the saliva dripping from your chin and onto your soft and marked up tits. 

“Fuck you’re such a dream..” He muttered, reaching for his phone and taking a picture of you, which you allowed. It would just be more material for later.

“MIn please–” 

“I know. Color?”

“Fuck Min don’t ask anymore. It’s green, and it’ll stay green.” You huffed out, wiping your chin as you crawled onto the bed. 

He quickly grabbed the camera to angle it so they could see him getting ready to go down on you. 

“We won’t need those useless toys.” He hummed out, practically ripping off the panties. It didn’t matter anyway, they wouldn’t be needed after tonight.

He began kissing down your body, spreading your legs open as he stared at all of your glory.

Your glistening pussy and the way that it was just ready for him made him so excited. 

He covered his fingers in his spit, rubbing them between your folds as he watched you squirm and moan from the feeling, “Please Min, put them in me– Make me squirt for you.” You whined.

That was new. 

He then inserted his middle finger into your hole, feeling your walls clench around the singular digit as you moaned from the stretch. He was reaching deep and he could tell just from the way you reacted. 

He fucked it into you, knowing it wouldn’t be enough but he wanted you to beg. 

“Min–”

“Beg for it. I want you to beg for me.” He teased, and it caused you to whine.

“Fuck Min– Please– I need it so bad, I want you so bad–” 

“Not good enough..”

You huffed, grinding against his palm, “Fuck your fingers into me please– Please Min– Your finger feels so good but I want more- anghh– Can I have more please?” You locked eyes with him as you said those words, and that made him give in.

As his ring finger entered you, he hummed out a “good girl” as you moaned from the stretch. Your eyes rolled as he began to curl his fingers.

Your hands went to cover your face, moaning into them as he thrusted his fingers in and out, curling them on occasion as his other hand came over to torture your clit, matching the pace of his fingers.

You were so close you could feel it, and it was unbelievable how close you were. Your best friends fingers were magic, and the way he continuously thrusted and curled his fingers, you were sure to ask him to fuck you again in the future.

“M-Min! Fuck– uugh– ‘M close Min! Min please– AH!” And that was it, your orgasm had hit so hard that your legs started shaking, but he didn’t stop there.

You felt like you were seeing stars, moaning out his name desperately as your whole body trembled, gripping the sheets like tomorrow as your eyes rolled back. 

When you came back down, you immediately got shot back up when you realized he hadn’t stopped.

“MIN! Shit– S-Sto– MMM! Ohmygod–” His fingers had been removed but he was rubbing your clit like there was no tomorrow.

“C’mon, give it to me, you can give me another baby..” He hummed out, watching you squirm underneath him as you tried stopping him, but he refused.

“Color?”

“SO FUCKING GREEN– OHMYGODMIN!” Your back arches, eyes begin to water as your hips lifted off the bed, squirting all over your thighs and on his abdomen. He grunted from the sight, licking his lips as he watched your body convulse and tremble.

He slapped your pussy once and it caused you to jolt.

“Good girl..” He hummed out, letting you take a minute to come back down your high.

You could still feel it even after the heavy orgasm, clenching around nothing as you looked up at him.

“Think you’re ready?” He asked, pressing a kiss to your forehead as you nodded.

“Yeah, I’m ready.” 

That was the moment he lined himself up with you, his tip prodding at your entrance before he slowly began to push in, holding your hips. He was gentle with you during this time.

You whimpered, gripping onto his forearms. The stretch wasn’t unbearable but it was still a stretch. You clenched around him and it caused him to grunt. 

“Relax, you’re okay baby..” He muttered, pressing soft kisses to your lips.

Once he was all the way in, you could see the smallest bump in your abdomen, your hand going to it and pressing down, causing you to moan and retreat your hand, “Fuck..”

“Look at that.. I fit..” He joked, a small laugh emitting from him as he let you adjust. 

“So full.. You’re so big.. Fuck–” You squirmed, grinding your hips against him. That was his signal.

Seungmin began to thrust into you, watching the small bump disappear and then reappear with every thrust. 

You weren’t sure when you started feeling it heavily, but when you did, you couldn’t stop moaning. Every thrust released a moan from you and he found it the hottest thing imaginable. 

“F-Faster Min– FUCK– Fuck me faster please– hard–harder–” You moaned out, gripping his forearms tightly, nails digging crescent moons. 

He grunted in response, doing exactly as you said. He wasn’t sure what felt better, the way your velvet walls felt so good around him or the way you’d clench so hard that he would’ve sworn he would cum. 

“Such a good girl– my good girl– taking me so well,, so deep.” He moaned out, gripping your hips tighter as he slammed into you over and over again. 

You weren’t sure how long this would go on, but you knew it was racking in views and donations. 

You also weren’t sure if this would change anything between you and Seungmin.

That didn’t matter right now, all that mattered was the pleasure the two of you were feeling.

“Ohmygodmin– fuck I-I– ‘M SOCLOSE–” You struggled to make out words, practically babbling at this point as your trembled. 

He could feel you pushing him out, and he knew exactly what it was.

He pulled out and watched as you whined and squirted. Fuck it was so hot watching you.

He pushed right back in as soon as you finished, thrusting just as fast as before. 

Your whines and moans didn’t even stop, they just kept going as he fucked into you.

Your body convulsed again, walls clenching around him. Just a little longer,, just a little longer and you knew he would cum.

“Fu–Holy shit– Y/N–” He couldn’t even get words out at this point, it all felt too good for him. He knew how close he was, yet he kept pushing and pushing. He wanted you to squirt once more before he came.

That’s when his hand came to your clit and began rubbing just as he did before.

You cried out, tears welling in your eyes before spilling. You knew you could take it, but your words kept spilling.

“I can’t– FUCKING– ohmy– ohmygodmin– SHIT I’M–” ANd he felt you push, so he pulled out and watched you squirt once more. It didn’t take him long to push back in, his thrusts now sloppy and stuttered as he huffed and moaned heavily.

“Take it– Hold it in you– Fuck–” He said into your ear, and within one, two, three thrusts, his hips stilled and he painted your walls white.

Both of you were panting heavily, looking back at each other as he both relished in post-orgasm. 

“Fuck Min,, that was so good..” You muttered out, pressing a kiss to his lips. You looked at the camera, smiling at it gently as you felt him pull out.

“Glad you enjoyed it, Y/N.” He hummed out, laying next to you and looking at the camera.

“Thank you so much for the idea meongmeong00, I’ve definitely had the time of my life.. And thank you to all those who came to enjoy it! I hope that this was good enough for you and that you’d want something like this in the future, see you guys next week!” You said before turning off the camera, Seungmin going to end the live.

“Holy shit Min..” You laughed out, sitting up as you clenched around nothing, some of his cum dripping from your cunt.

“You have fun?”

“Hell yeah.. That’s the best fuck I’ve ever had in my life!” You stood up with shaky legs, going to him and pressing a kiss on his lips.

“Yeah? How about another round?”

“Abso-fucking-lutely.” 

“Take his dick like a good girl, lovely. I'm a patient man. I'll fuck you after until your body is dry and your pussy is dripping on my cock.”

Among Strangers II | Han + Bang Chan

Synopsis: You know nothing is ever as it seems. You never assume and you always expect for things to get a little messy. You didn't expect for things to end up like this though. Not like this...

Pairings: CEO Bang Chan x AFAB Reader x Han Jisung

Content Includes: smut, non idol au, light bondage, possessiveness, biting/marking, oral (m+f receiving), unprotected sex, creampie lots, exhibitionism, voyeurism, mfm, angst, jealousy, light fluff, happy ending.

an: there's a lot going on in this one and I'm sure I missed some content to list. If you feel that I should add it please let me know♡ Also forgive me if this doesn't do justice to part one... I tried ಠ⁠﹏⁠ಠ

Want more smut? Follow the banana 🍌

PS: Those who asked to be tagged/asked for part 2 are tagged. If you want to be removed please let me know.

Also thank you to everyone who expressed their love for part one. Even if I didn't respond, your words meant more than you can ever imagine, more than I can even say♡

It's been a whole week since that steamy, unforgettable encounter with your hot new boss, Chris, in that crowded subway car. Now, every time you catch each other's gaze at work, it's like reliving that sweet sinful moment all over again. The memory of his hands on your skin and the warmth of his chest pressed against your back still lingers. The tension between you two is palpable, and your cheeks flush hot every time he brushes past you in the hall. His playful smile, those charming dimples, they only add fuel to the fire that continuously burns in you and the physical reactions your body has when he's near.

You've tried avoiding him but he's everywhere. Every turn there he is, dark eyes, hair perfectly styled and outfit tailored in all black perfection looking runway ready. Each time you've seen him and turned to walk in the opposite direction, there he is. It's like he spawns in front of you and there's nothing you can do but blush at the sight of him as he walks away with some important looking people. It isn't until Friday at the end of your shift that he catches you in the staff break room when you go to get your thermos from the fridge.

“You've been avoiding me, y/n ” Chris states, his voice low, walking into the room and shutting the door behind him with a soft click.

You spin around startled, heart in your throat and too stunned to speak. The top three buttons of his black dress shirt are undone and his sleeve have been rolled up halfway. He looks breathtaking and the sudden sight of him throws you off. You didn't see much of him today so you figured he either was too busy or just left earlier but here he is looking just as sexy as he did that day on the subway. The way he’s looking at you right now you don't trust yourself being alone with him. Not while still being at work where there's a risk of anyone catching you two. Swallowing nervously you back up as he starts to walk towards you smiling.

“Do I make you nervous y/n?” He asks, getting closer to you. Your heart is pounding far too fast now. It would be a miracle if he couldn't hear it himself. Why is he making you react this way?

“No.” Your voice comes out small and weak as you lie. He can see the way your chest rises and falls rapidly that you're full of shit.

When he reaches you, your back is against the counter and he cages you with his arms, hands on the edge of the counter. You smell so good to him and he loves the soft blush on your cheeks. He wants to see it deepen while he's deep inside you. Every time he saw you earlier in the week he could feel his cock stiffen at the memory of your cunt around him. He wanted nothing more than to take you and bend you over his desk.

Just yesterday he lost it when he saw you in the hall wearing all black like him. He couldn't help but wonder if you did it on purpose. The tight black skirt that reached your knees hugged your curves and the blouse you wore made his imagination run wild. He took his erection in his hands in his office thinking about how pretty you would look on your knees with all of him down your throat.

“I could have you right here, right now y/n. I want to. Do you want me to?” You bite your lip and nervously look at the door behind him. “It's locked. Just say the word.”

You open your mouth to speak only to close it and nibble on your lip with your face full of uncertainty. It isn't that you don't want him. You positively want him in the worst way, in every way possible, yet you hesitate still. He's watching you, still smiling sweetly waiting for your answer and you can't help but notice the barely visible freckles that pepper his handsome face. They go from his cheek bones and up around the outside of his eyes like stars. You're lost in his beauty when you notice how red his ears have gotten and he chuckles.

“Like what you see y/n?” He teases trying to sound cocky but there's a shyness to his words. You take him by surprise when you nod and finally speak up.

“Yes. To both of your questions. My answer is yes.” You tell him and his brows go up in surprise before his hands are on your hips and he's kissing you, groaning when your lips make contact.

You wondered how those lush full lips would feel on yours and it's like nothing you could've imagined it to be like. His lips are soft and taste of strawberries as his tongue glides over yours before he nibbles on your bottom lip. Just with a kiss he makes you feel weightless, like you're suspended in the air. As the kiss grows more intense you can taste his need and Chris is lifting you up sitting you down on the countertop standing between your legs.

“Fuck y/n, do you have any idea how crazy I was feeling the whole week without hearing from you?” He asks after pulling away from your lips. “Nothing I did satisfied my hunger. Only your cunt can do that.” He kisses you again and rubs his hard bulge over your clit through your dress and hitches up the hem.

He reaches between you both and with his fingers rips your thong like it was made out of paper. Your moans are loud with shock but muffled by the kiss. He pulls back and looks at you with eyes like embers and kneels between your legs. He wastes no time in diving his hot tongue inside of you. He shows no mercy on your cunt and it doesn't take long to feel that electric sensation in you build but he stops just before you can reach your climax. He growls “no.” when he feels your muscles tighten around his tongue.

He looks up at you, his neat hair now a mess because of your greedy fingers and he says, “You'll cum on my cock again. I've got to feel you bear hug my cock like last time y/n.” He says standing up straight, flicking his belt out of the loops and it falls to the sides as he begins to unbutton and unzip his slacks. “I'd bound your wrist with my belt if I wasn't so fucking desperate to feel you.” With a clack his pants hit the ground and he snaps into your drenched sex hard.

In one thrust he's completely inside of you with a groan deep in his throat from the pleasure. Your eyes are on the ceiling, mouth hung open in a silent Oh. A moan that got stuck somewhere in your throat, lost in oblivion. You forget all about where you are, only that you can finally wrap your legs and arms Chris's muscular body and grind your pussy into him as he fucks you instead of having to be restricted. His cock feels so much lengthier this way and each time he bottoms out your moans get so loud you have to bite down on his shoulder over the neatly pressed black cotton of his shirt.

“Fuck y/n, I knew you'd feel amazing around me like this. Free to move, free to… ah. Free to crush me with your thighs.” He tells you and his arm wraps around your waist tighter. “Come back to my place after work tomorrow baby.” It's not really a question, though if you said no he wouldn't force you. He knows your mind is so muddled with lust and passion that you'll agree. Because you need him right now, because you're so close.

“Yes! Oh god Chris fuck. Yes I'll come. Fuck i'm gonna cum.” You gasp. Every breath leaving your lungs is cut short with each of his rough thrusts and he smirks against your neck.

“Yeah baby, thatta girl. Cum on Chris's cock. You can do it for me. Be as fucking loud as you want. No one can do anything about it. This building is mine and so is this pussy.” He grunts, his body trembling.

Although it's only the second time, you've noticed that he sets claim to you when he's close to cumming. When he really relaxes and lets go, he loses all of his composure.

“Y/n, don't hold back princess, I need to hear you. I wanted to hear you moan my name on that fucking Subway to let everyone around us know that it was me making you feel good.”

Instead you bite through the fabric of his shirt harder making him hiss and slam into your cunt harder than he has. The sensation makes you come crashing down shuddering and whimpering into his shirt as your cunt convulses around his cock. He keeps his thrusts going, pushing past your muscles that tighten. He's groaning loud, not caring about who walks past the break room door. Every curse, every praise can be heard by anyone within fifteen feet of the room.

“That's it. Fuck, oh yeah baby keep cumming for me, don't stop beautiful. Make a fucking mess on my cock.” He groans, slamming his cock into you and rotating his hips.

He could very well cum right now, fill your pussy just like he did last week but he's holding back because he wants you sore and spent when you go home. He wants your mind on nothing but his cock until he sees you again.

“Mm fucking hell. You like that don't you? Yeah I can tell you do. Your pussy tells me just what I need to know baby girl.”. He breathes, voice sounding strained.

He feels like he's going to go insane. The veins in his neck, arms and hands are prominent showing just how hard he's fucking you and how much he's straining himself. It's taking a lot for him to hold back and wait for you to cum again especially when you arch your back like that, eyes shut, mouth hanging open and whispering his name over and over. It's a beautiful fucking sight to him. He should've waited until he had you in his bed but soon as he saw you step off the elevator and walk into this room his feet were moving. He meant every word when he said that nothing could satisfy his hunger except for your cunt but now he's not even sure that'll do it. He still feels like a starving man even now that he's balls deep inside of you, ready to coat your walls white.

“Gonna cum, I can't- mm! I can't… I can't fucking hold it anymore y/n, shit!.”

You open your eyes and find his eyes on you, round and glassy like he's high. His face and ears are red and his bottom lip is pulled in-between his teeth grunting into you. You feel his cum filling you up and the pressure sends another orgasm ripping through your body. You're both shuddering and out of breath and equally both craving more.

“Shit that was fucking intense y/n.” He whispers, still feeling your cunt fluttering around his cock like butterfly wings.

The clock on the wall behind Chris reads 7:40pm and you should've been home an hour ago but right now, Chris is intent on helping you clean up. Brushing a soft clean handkerchief that he pulled from his pocket over your sensitive core sending jolts throughout your body and his sly smile says how much he's enjoying himself.

“I think you're enjoying yourself too much Mr. Bang.” You tease watching his hands between your legs. He chuckles and looks up at you, stuffing the cloth back into his pocket along with your shredded thong when he's done and you raise an eyebrow at him.

“I enjoy myself plenty around you y/n if you haven't noticed. I'm sure I'll enjoy myself even more. Meet me in the parking garage tomorrow after work?” He asks and you nod. “Sweet then I'll see you then.” With a wink he leaves you alone in the break room blinking and shaking your head with a small laugh.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

With a groan, your body sags against your front door soon as you step foot into your apartment. Kicking your heels off you watch as they clatter and go skidding across the hardwood floor. You're in need of a hot shower, it's been too long of an evening for you on top of work and Chris cornering you in the break room. Never in your wildest fantasies did you think you'd be doing something like this. All because you fucked your boss in a crowded subway car.

You shake your head at the memory of the moment he showed a glimpse of who he truly was that day. He knew you worked for him before he even made a move. That didn't stop him and as you walk further into your apartment you wonder if he'll regret anything in the long run. Lost in thought you're oblivious to the large shadowy figure standing inside the dark bathroom waiting for you to walk past.

Soon as you're past the open door the figure emerges and a hand goes around your mouth while the other traps both of your wrists, holding them behind your back. The screams you let out are muffled as you try to shake free but it's useless. Whoever has you is strong and they're not letting go. Your only option left is to fight. Fight to win just like your friend Minho taught you. As you raise your leg, intending to kick it back, a dark whisper against your ear stops you cold.

“I wouldn't do that y/n.” Says the voice, raspy and deep.

Your eyes go round at the sound of your name like that. It's full of such anger and venom. It turns your blood icy.

“Fucker! Let… Go.” You mumble loudly but it just sounds like, “Mm! Mmpf.. mmm.”

Your captor laughs darkly behind you and holds you tighter making you groan uncomfortably by their strength. “I'm loving these noises that you're making y/n. Is this all it took in order for me to hear you sound like this? Shit, baby.”

You roll your eyes and when you smile, the man lets your mouth free to speak, “Jisungie baby, I always sound like this for you.”

Your boyfriend Jisung chuckles and licks your neck right over the hickey that Chris gave you last week. The color has faded some but Jisung will just bite and suck the same area to make it come back.

“That's my lovely baby. You're going to be loud for me aren't you jagi?” He asks, still buried in the crook of your neck. “I need you baby. Need you so bad. Need to remind you whose pussy this is. God it's always so hot watching another guy enjoy what's mine.” You feel him smirk on your neck.

That damn smirk. You almost said fuck it that day in the subway train car when he looked at you like that. That smirk always makes you wet. It's so cocky, so confident, so… Jisung. This game the two of you have, has been going on for so long you never know when it starts and ends or if it actually ends for that matter. The plan is always the same, pick up a guy at the bar and bring him back home where Jisung sits in the shadows to watch you get your back blown out. Afterwards he fucks you even harder than the guy did all with the warm cum of another man still inside you. It's a win-win you think. You like being watched and Jisung loves to watch. But that night you ran into Chris was a pure accident. Since it was the middle of the week the bar was dead. Boredom muddled your mind and when you saw that your boyfriend was behind you, you had the brilliant idea of playing cat and mouse. You just didn't expect to get fucked in public let alone to be fucked by your boss.

“I'm relentless, am I now? hm? That's what you told him that day right lovely? Hm?” He hums against your neck before biting down over the mark making you gasp that soon transitions into moan trailing off into silence. He sucks down hard and when your body turns to liquid he's picking you up and taking you into the bedroom you share.

“Yes…” You hedge and he smirks again before kissing you rough.

“Mmm gonna show your pussy just how relentless I really am. Do you still feel his cum inside of you my love?” Jisung questions you sweetly. You told him about why you were late when you got into your car to drive home. He was mad he didn't get to watch but you knew he'd be waiting at home, hard and in need of your sore pussy. When you nod he bites his lips. “Fuck.”

He tosses you onto the bed and is on top of you before your body can stop bouncing. His hands roam all over your body like he hasn't memorized every inch of it over the past 4 years you've been together. Jisung undresses you, tossing your clothes into the open closet. When he sits up to take his shirt off you catch him off guard by biting his left pec. His legs shake and his arms fly around you.

“Again jagi.” He demands, twisting around and falling back onto the bed with you on top.

His chest is littered in bite marks and his erection is now too painful for him to handle. You take care of him, removing his baggy black acid wash jeans. Your aim isn't as good as his and when you toss them over your shoulder they hit the wall. You both laugh at your clumsiness and his eyes are so full of love. You love your boyfriend, never once has any man you've slept with threatened the bond you two have. Jisung has never been jealous even when you're arching your back and moaning while someone else fucks you senseless. Because he knows that this is where you always end up in his arms.

When you take his cock into your hands still smiling wide while lining him up with your entrance, he caresses your body and whispers, “I love you my baby.”

With a smile that grows as well as your arousal you sink down taking every inch of him and moan, “I love you too Jisung.”

You ride him until your legs wobble, two orgasms in and he still isn't ready to let you go. He wasn't kidding when he told you he'd show just how relentless he is. Flipping you over onto your back he fucks two more orgasms from you and only then does he cum. Claiming your body and heart as his. Neither of you plan on moving from where you are, too spent to lift your heads off the pillow. But after a quick nap your activities resume. Following into the shower, to the kitchen and back into the bedroom until late in the night.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

“I don't know Ji, should we really keep this going? He's my boss, this is different than some rando in a bar babe.” You sigh, holding your phone in your hand.

Today was your off day but Chris got your number from your file at work and texted you wondering if you were still down to meet up. You were having second thoughts about the whole game now. This could get really messy if it starts conflicting with work. Jisung walks over to where you stand in the kitchen and wraps you in his arms.

“What is it baby? Are you afraid I'll get upset? Why would I when I know that the only one that can fuck you right is me.” He gives you a cocky grin and kisses your forehead. When he looks at you again he's got a serious expression on his face. “If things get to be too much we'll stop, baby. I promise.”

You nod, still feeling a little indecisive but not wanting to worry Jisung. He needs all his focus on this song he's writing for a big client of his. Some guy named Seungmin, who's a pretty big deal you've been told. It's just nerves you tell yourself. You're just nervous since Jisung won't be around like he normally is. It's definitely not because you're worried about how Chris makes you feel.

“Come straight home after you leave his place baby. I'll miss you if you stay too long.” He pouts a little, making you smile.

“You know I hate being away from you for too long, Ji.” You tell him before leaving the apartment.

>

The whole drive to the parking garage of CBO your heart would not stop racing and your hands, sweaty on the steering wheel, began to shake when you pulled into the dim garage.

Get a hold of yourself y/n, shit. If Ji isn't worried then no reason I should be right?

Your little pep talk in the car is cut short when you see Chris walking out of the elevator looking hot in a plain black tee and black jeans. Your heart skips a beat and you force yourself to move. When he spots you stepping out of your car his reaction to you wearing a white tank top and denim jeans is just about the same as yours only he becomes instantly erect at the sight of you.

“Sup gorgeous?” He greets you, putting his hands in the front pocket of his jeans, giving you a cheeky lopsided grin.

You giggle and feel yourself relaxing at how casual he looks and talks to you. “Sup yourself Chris.”

“Come on let's get out of here before I fuck you in the backseat of my car. I don't think I can keep my hands to myself seeing you looking like that.”

He walks in the direction of his car and you mutter under your breath, “Feeling's mutual Bang.” Too quiet for him to hear.

Twenty minutes later you're underneath him, a whining begging mess, tied up to his bed and overstimulated beyond your limits just like he's dreamt about. He's brought you to the brink of cumming so many times you've lost count. You're not even sure how long you've been in this bed, you're only aware of the sounds that Chris conjures up from you and the satisfied moans of his that follow.

"Please Chris.” You whimper when he pulls his cock out for what feels like the hundredth time tonight. “Mm! Please let me cum. Please, please.” He looks down at you with bedroom eyes and trails a hand down the length of your body.

“Nah, don't wanna. Ceebs baby. Think I'll just leave you like this.” His smile spreads ear to ear when you widen your eyes and he starts laughing, throwing his head back. “I'm just kidding, beautiful but you should've seen your face.”

He comes plowing into your cunt with so much force that the headboard bumps the wall and you're screaming out his name. Chris smirks with each long quick stroke inside of you, getting just what he wanted. For you to lose control and let go. He needs to hear his name being spilled out from your soft lips that he can't stop kissing as if you were his girl. The way your body shivers when he grinds his pelvis hard over your clit makes him fuck you even harder with possessive primal moaning growls.

“Call me baby.” He demands out of nowhere gasping and kneading your breast in his hands as he looks down at you.

Without thinking you do it. It's impossible to not get swept up in the heat of the moment, to do any thinking of your own right now. So you call him baby. Over and over you say the name and watch as it has a physical reaction to him. Like a button that's been pressed Chris puts his all into fucking you.

“That's it baby girl. Sounds like heaven from your lips. Fuck, ah! Gonna cum y/n. Cum with me yeah? You're gonna cum with me. Yeah, yeah like that.” He sucks in air between his teeth slowly before gritting them. His jaw muscle flexes and you feel his cum spraying inside of you just as your own orgasm bursts through you.

It felt so good to Chris. To have you in his home, in his bed. It felt… right. Felt even better having all of you to himself. He only kept edging you simply because he didn't want the night to end so early. He knew you'd leave his side soon. When he finally drove you back to your car it was like torture to him. He couldn't pull away from you and ended up fucking you in the back seat of his car.

By the time you get home, poor Jisung doesn't know what hit him. You're on him as soon as you walk in the door. Sex drive still high, cunt still needy and the guilt of calling another man baby simmering inside you. Although Jisung doesn't complain, he feels this sudden odd feeling begin to gnaw at him. He's never felt this type of emotion. It's strange and foreign to him it's starting to piss him off but he bites the feeling down, pulling you closer to him suddenly afraid of letting you go.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

The difference between Jisung and Chris is like being struck by lightning from both sides. No bolt is the same but you'll still burn from the inside out. With Jisung his moans when he fully lets himself go are whiny, desperate, needy just like your own and the random grunts and growls here and there when his orgasm builds always echo in your mind pushing you to reach your own peak. It's like diving off a cliff into the ocean, it swallows you up. Chris, he talks a lot more, praises you through gritted teeth with a low feral growl at the end of almost every sentence. He's the epitome of alpha male commanding your body to experience an earth shattering mind altering orgasm with a single word.

And night after night Chris commands your body. You return home to Jisung after spending a few long hours with Chris after work and you never get back home in one piece. Not without some new mark on you. Whether it's from his mouth or the pretty white ribbons he ties your wrists and ankles with, there's something. Ji always covers them up with his own markings with a growl and claim to you. “Mine. Naekkeo.” Jisung will moan, filling you up as many times as he can.

Tonight will be no different when you go home. You're currently tied up in Chris's bed with his tongue buried in your cunt as you cum with so much force you pull hard on your restraints not caring that they dig into your skin. You hear Chris laughing, feeling his breath breeze against you all while your legs are shaking on his shoulders.

“That's my girl. You're so delicious y/n. Shall I have another go? I'm still hungry.” He says, with amusement in his voice, raising his head and licking his lips.

“Chris please. I can't… that was the fifth orgasm you've given me with just your mouth. I'm too sensitive and far too out of breath. Let's call it a night please?” You beg in-between your panting breaths.

“Only because you said please and you look so cute like that. Why don't you stay the night babe hm?” Chris smiles down at you, freeing your hands from his headboard.

“I can't, I mean… remember I told you I don't feel comfortable.” You stutter rubbing your wrist looking down at the bright red line that goes all the way around.

“Right. My bad angel, no worries. I'm sure I'll wake up to your beautiful face soon.” He winks smiling like he's got some juicy secret that only he knows about. “Need a ride?”

Shaking your head you look up at him, “It's okay I drove.” You reply smiling sweetly and once you're dressed and not walking like a newborn fawn, he kisses you on the head and walks you out of large home.

When you get home you barely have it in you to take a shower. Every step you took, you could still feel Chris's mouth. His hot tongue, his beautiful lips sucking your clit. You're still too sensitive and it's a beautiful torture. As soon as you're out of the shower you fall into the bed with Jisung right behind you sliding up to you cock out and hard but you're too tired. You feel bad about leaving him to take care of himself.

“I'm sorry baby he spent two hours eating me out and I'm so tired.” You tell Jisung groggily and he pouts, taking your hands in his, kissing your wrists.

“That fucker.” He mutters under his breath angrily. He's upset but not with you. “It's okay though sweetie, you sleep.” He rubs his nose over yours and kisses your lips making you smile.

“I love you Sungie.” You mumble before drifting off to sleep peacefully.

Waking up is anything but peaceful though. Jisung is pissed and shuffling around the house pouting with his brows furrowed and a dark aura around him like some anime villain.

“Baby?” You say and there's silence. “Ji?” Still nothing. “My Han and only?” That does it and he cracks a smile while shoving instant ramen in his mouth, pointing his chopsticks to the plate of breakfast he made you. “What's the matter Hannie?”

He chews still pouting and you can't help but smile at him. His cheeks puff out when he gets like this but you know after breakfast he'll fuck you in the kitchen and he'll be okay.

“That fucker Bang.” He grumbles.

“I'm sorry about last night, baby.” You say taking a bite of watermelon.

“He's been keeping you later every time for the past two weeks and when you get home you're so sore that I wonder if I'm hurting you or we can't do anything at all. I haven't fucked you in two days. Don't go today, baby. Stay with me.” He confesses and you get up to sit on his knee.

“Of course I'll stay baby. You know if you don't want me to go that's all you have to say. I'll text Chris later and let him know.” Jisung nods and nuzzles your chest with his cheek like a cat.

“Sweetie… you don't like fucking him better than me do you?” Jisung asks, suddenly making your heart crack.

“Of course not baby. Why would you even think that?”

“I… uh. You were talking in your sleep last night and moaned his name.” He says.

Oh so that's why he's so mad… Now you're the one pouting.

“Never baby. I'm sorry for my brain. You know it has a mind of its own.” You say and he laughs hugging you tight. “You're going to make me do more than moan your name aren't you Sungie?”

“Mmm lovely you know I am.”

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Breakfast long forgotten Jisung has you bent over the table staring into your reflection of the closet door across from you. Its surface is a mirror from ceiling to floor and you can see the pure desire on his face from behind you.

“Fuck.” He whispers, rubbing your ass in a circle after smacking hard and chuckles when you give it a shake. “I want you to watch me fuck you.” He tells you low and tender.

He slides his cock into you with a groan, throwing his head back before looking at your reflection. He loves seeing your cheeks turn pink from pleasure, loves how your lips poke out making him wish there was two of him so you can wrap your lips around his cock while he fucks you like this. He starts moving and you grip the side of the table hard with a gasp. You're sore still but you both love it when your swollen like this. You have a feeling this'll be a quickie but your boyfriend will worship and cherish your body all day long, making up for the two days he didn't have you.

“Gotta fuck his cum outta my sweet lovely baby.” Jisung says picking up speed. He groans along with you when you push back into him meeting his thrust.

“Jisung!” You gasp and he chuckles behind you.

“See how you look baby? You see why I can't ever get enough of you huh? I really needed this. Needed you, y/n baby” Jisung slaps your ass and then rubs his hand over the redness.

He repeats the move again each time he rams his cock into you. Over again until you're falling flat onto the table and letting out a long groaning moan and cumming around him.

“Yes.” He whispers, extending the word before he loses his ability to say anything more.

He's fucking you just as hard as Chris does all while moaning uncontrollably, breathing heavily and digging his fingers into ass as he grips it tight. God you love the sounds he makes. He's always been the noisiest man you've ever slept with, never shying away or holding back and you found that to be the sexiest thing ever. What started as a one night stand between you and Jisung years ago became what you have today. Four amazing years.

“Oh? My baby's gonna cum again. Hm? Hm baby? Oh God. Fuck y/n. Yeah rub your clit just like that. Gonna fill you now baby.” Jisung grunts, pulling you back into him as he thrusts forward three final times, feeling you reach another climax before throwing his head back, freezing and spilling his cum inside you.

That's how your day goes with Jisung. Spoiling you not just with sex but love. Deep inside you know it's because he feels like he has to do better than Chris, be better than your CEO boss but he doesn't need to do any of that. Can't tell him that though. Once he sets his mind to something, he sees through it till the end.

With Jisung on the phone with his client Seungmin, going over the song he wrote for him, you decide to message Chris and let him know you won't be able to come over tonight before doing some light chores. Ding! Your phone notification goes off from the coffee table while you wash dishes in the kitchen.

“Ji baby, could you check that for me please? It's probably Chris. I let him know I wouldn't be coming tonight.” You call over your shoulder. It's nothing new, you two always check each other's phone whenever the other has their hands full. However this is the first time a message has actually angered someone in the relationship.

Jisung scoffs staring down at your phone, feeling the rage and jealousy build up inside of him. He's seeing red at the short text message in front of him. The room is quiet and you're unaware of all the sudden anger that's seeping out of Jisung but inside of him is so loud.

“No worries, my baby. If you need me you know who to call.” He spits out in a mocking tone making you turn around in shock.

You've never heard him like this. You watch Jisung pace the floor grabbing his hair in his hands and you quickly go to him. Placing a damp hand on his shoulder carefully, he looks at you and you finally see it. Past the anger in his eyes there's uncertainty. He really is worried about losing you. Worried that your boss is trying to take you away from him and it's been eating him up inside silently but for how long? Why couldn't you see it before? Why didn't he just tell you that was how he was feeling? Communication, that's what you two always lived by.

“Sungie baby…” You whisper.

“Who does he think he is huh? Your boyfriend? No. I am. You're not his. You're mine.” He kisses you roughly before you can speak.

You moan against his mouth when he slips his hand over and under the band of your leggings and finds that you're not wearing any panties like you normally do at home. He growls and bites your bottom lip before plunging two fingers inside.

“This pussy is mine, it won't ever belong to another. Isn't that right sweetie?” He asks, breathing heavily like he's just ran a marathon.

“Yes baby, all yours. Only yours.” You breathe, legs shaking as he fingers you and kisses you hard again.

That night Jisung fucked you harder than ever. It was like he was a possessed man, it wasn't him but you'd never admit that you loved it.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Though he was still feeling a little jealous, Jisung still encouraged you to go to Chris's but this time he'd go with you and wait in the car. That's why you're tied up and blindfolded in Chris's room on your knees in front of him. You can hear his feet shuffling around but you just assume he's cleaning up after he filled your throat with every inch of him, fucking your throat until he came. He's been pretty easy on you tonight. You're not sore and the ribbons don't pinch so much.

“So babe, did you miss me?” He asks, coming to stand in front of you.

“I did.” You answer honestly.

“Yeah baby?” He purrs and you feel him get down to your level. “Did your boyfriend fuck you good the other night?”

Your mouth pops open comedically and Chris laughs kissing you on your head. A thousand thoughts flood your mind, jumbled and frantic.

“Yeah, I know about Jisung beautiful. When I ran a background check on ya he popped up. I've known ever since that day after we met. He's a great songwriter at the company. Pops was right to hire him.” He confesses and you're too stunned to speak but he's not quite done.

“What surprised me though was that the so-called creep following you that day was your boyfriend. It's a fun game you two play, so I'll go along with it for however long you want.” He stands up, lovingly caressing your head. “Because I know that despite you going home to someone else, it's my cock that you're thinking of and lusting for.”

He fucks your mouth again but denys you when you ask if he's going to fuck you now. Instead he unties you and reminds you that your boyfriend is waiting for you in the car. You're fuming when you get into the car. Jisung doesn't quite know how to handle the situation at the moment, not while he's driving. It's not until you're home that he takes care of you once you're both home in bed. Laying in bed post climax, Jisung has the most ridiculous idea that's ever come out of his mouth and he's said some crazy things before.

“How about a friendly competition between men? Chris and I take you together and see who's the better man. You know, just for fun.” He smirks to himself laying on his arm and looking up at the ceiling. “If he can't handle it, then game over Christopher.” He says and laughs at himself before rolling over and burying his face in your tits.

“Uh, yeah... I don't know if he'll be down for that Hannie but if that's what you what I'll relay the message.” You reply and thread your fingers through his hair. "Just remember he's responsible for our paychecks."

You're certain Jisung is just joking or if he isn't he'll change his mind. Right? There's no way he'd go through with that idea but isn't that how this game you two have going on started? One crazy idea from the genius mind of Han Jisung. Could you handle it though? Having both men inside of you? The thought made you nervous and excited and honestly you were kind of hoping that Chris would agree. And to your surprise, he does. Now you're in a coffee shop talking about a threesome. How did your life get to this?

>

“You're a crazy man Han Jisung.” Chris says, leaning back in his chair. He's looking every bit of the CEO that he is in the small cafe that he agreed to meet you and Jisung at. There's an amused smile on his face as he takes a sip of his freshly pressed juice. “But you're on. Obviously this is just for shits and giggles. In the end whatever y/n wants goes.” He continues and smiles at you flashing his dimples.

“Of course what my baby wants goes. Anything to make my girlfriend happy.” Jisung responds, placing his arm over your shoulders possessively pulling you closer to him.

You sit in silence looking between both men amused and intrigued. The conversation shifts into one of more intimate topics: You. Specifically your body and who would be where inside of you. Your whole face and chest flush pink at how casual they talk. They actually seem to be getting along well when they comment on what you like and don't like. Both men know your body so well. Probably even better than you know yourself.

“So it's settled then. My place the day after tomorrow? Let's say… around 8.” Chris says looking pleased with himself. “I don't plan on losing so it may be a long night. I figure 8 will give you time to rest before princess.” He looks at you and winks before getting up from his seat to leave. “See you two then.”

When Chris is gone you turn to Jisung, doubt in your chest. You need to make sure he really wants this. This will get messy quickly if more jealousy seeps it's way back into the mix. You don't want to lose Jisung so you double and triple check with him on if this is really what he wants to do.

“Are you sure you wanna do this baby?” You question taking in your boyfriend's features as the sun from the large storefront window makes him glow radiantly. The brown in his eyes pop, looking like the cup of coffee in your hands.

“Lovely, I could ask you the same. Please don't do this if you don't want to. I know you love me naekkeo.” He brings your hand to his lips and kisses your knuckles. “Don't feel like you have to do this for either me or Chris, okay?”

You smile and nod feeling your heart bloom in your chest. You hit the jackpot with Jisung. Have you gotten wealthier with Chris too?

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

The room is silent and a gentle breeze from Chris's open window stirs your hair around your shoulders. You didn't think you'd feel so nervous but you're shaking with anticipation as you're kneeling on Chris's large bed naked for both him and Jisung. Biting your lip, you sit up on your knees straddling Chris and wait as Jisung comes up behind you. Taking your hips he lubes your ass and his cock up, making things slippery so it's easier for him to enter you. Slowly he guides himself into you from behind all while kissing his way down the side of your neck, pausing to bite down gently on your shoulder. You're moaning and crying with pleasure once your boyfriend is fully inside of you. All the while Chris lays underneath you. Watching you and stroking his cock, caressing your left thigh with his fingers.

“You ready baby?” Jisung whispers behind you in your ear.

Your body reacts, shuddering around him and his groans are felt against your chest. You feel his cock pulsating inside of you and you feel desperate for movement. Nodding your head Jisung guides you down onto Chris who lines himself up with your entrance nice and slow. Excruciatingly slow. Just the tip of Chris's cock is inside of you and you're whining at the pinch and stretching sensation. Brief doubt that you can take them both bubbles up in your mind but you push it aside and keep pushing down taking the length of him in carefully.

When Chris pushes up helping you take the last remaining inches, your back arches and you cry out. Not from pain although you can feel that sting of being fully stretched but from pleasure once both men are fully sheathed inside of you. It's a strange blissful feeling, their cocks pressed tightly together with only the thin wall of your flesh between them. With Jisung taking your breasts in his hands, Chris sits up and guides the movements like the leader he is. It's just a natural thing and the three of you seem to fall into that unconsciously. Thrusting and moving your hips along with his guiding hands until a synchronized rhythm starts. It's slow at first, far too slow for you and it becomes hard for you to relax your muscles around each man.

“Fuck me.” You grind out, sweating and already breathless.

There's a shared moan between Jisung and Chris that vibrates through you and echoes in the quiet room. You don't give them a chance to respond, you're moving for them, taking over the pace. Fuck does it amazing, that fullness. Your orgasm is quick and you're groaning and writhing with pleasure cumming hard.

Your head falls back, landing on Jisung's shoulder while he still keeps his push and pull in and out of your ass all while you cum around Chris's cock. His thrusts force your body to continuously rock against him, heightening the sensation and pleasure all together. Chris grunts and fights back to urge to cum with you, determined not to lose against Jisung. Both men, stubborn as hell would gladly fuck you all night long trying to last longer than the other but you're not sure how much longer you can keep up. Your legs would've given out long ago if you weren't held up by Jisung's arms as he cradles you, pumping his cock into you.

“Fuck, I can feel everything baby. God keep cumming. More baby.” Jisung groans in your ear, coaxing you.

Your whimpers make both Chris and Jisung feel absolutely insane. Chris in particular is struggling watching your face. How your features contort beautifully with each synchronized thrust, it's like seeing the stars for the first time to him. He feels his balls tighten and he knows that he'll lose as soon as you cum around him again. You're already babbling incoherently but it becomes even more crazed and hard to understand when Chris places a firm thumb over your clit. Your whole body tenses up and both men curse and grunt in harmony and it's such a beautiful sound.

“Mm y/n. Shit, shit that's a good girl. You're close baby girl. That's right cum on my cock again.” Chris whispers and bucks his hips up off the bed causing both his and Jisung's cock to ram up harshly inside you.

“Ah, fuck!” You cry loudly holding onto Jisung's arms and clawing at him. Legs shaking, eyes rolling in the back of your head and with a strange tortured groan your second orgasm erupts from within you.

It's too much for them, you feel so much tighter than before and their own orgasm happens with no warning. Both your cunt and ass are being filled at the same time and the feeling is phenomenal.

“Ah! fuck naekkeo… F-fuck me!” Jisung groans and the sound shortly turns into a long winded whine.

“Oh shit y/n fuck. So beautiful, so fuuucking beautiful.” Chris breathes and growls, thrusting upwards more. “Yeah that's- mm! That's it baby.”

Fuck a bet you need to experience this everyday. Is this what addiction feels like? They're still inside of you, cocks softening while slowly dribbling the last drops of cum into your sore and stretched holes but you want them to fill you up even more. As completely fucked out of your mind you are, you still don't want to move from where you are. Two pairs of hands caress your body, relaxing you after the intense full body orgasm you just had. You feel so loved and taken care of. It's an overwhelming feeling and a tear falls from your eye and down the side of your face onto Jisung's shoulders.

“Sweetie? What's wrong, does it hurt? Here I'll pull out first slowly.” Jisung says worried voice tender and full of concern.

Once he's out and moving to stand beside the bed he picks you up, pulling you off of Chris's lap and gently lays you down beside the man who's looking at you wide eyed and terrified that he might've hurt you.

“Y/n babe, where does it hurt? Tell us beautiful. Please?” Chris pleads when you start fully crying.

Shaking your head and covering your face you take a deep breath trying to calm down. “I'm sorry boys, I'm okay. I'm not hurt, I'm just… fuck. That was just amazing. I felt so overwhelmed and I don't want this,” you wave your arms around gesturing to the three of you. “To end because the bet is over. I also feel like shit for wanting that but…” you trail off looking up at the ceiling laying on top of black silk sheets.

The room is silent and when you close your eyes you feel Jisung slide into bed on your other side. For a minute, the three of you just lay there listening to the cars drive past outside through the open window. You don't open your eyes until you hear laughter on either side of you.

“What's so funny?!” You say turning your head back and forth to look at Chris and Jisung.

“Oh my gosh she's so cute. You're a lucky man Jisung.” Chris says, wiping fake tears from his eyes.

“Thanks bro. That she is.” Your boyfriend says and you sit up suddenly wincing at the soreness.

“Okay not that I'm complaining but where the hell did this sudden bromance come from?” You question, which only makes them laugh even more. Crossing your arms you pout and wait for their laughing to subside.

“My baby, my angel, my lovely... We're two men who only want to make you happy and cherish you from head to toe,” Jisung kisses your shoulder when he sits up. “How could all that not have been a bonding moment between all of us? I'm down to do whatever makes my baby happy.

“Yeah, no worries gorgeous. I mean granted we… ya know, work out a better routine or something, this arrangement can work out I think.” Chris agrees and takes your hand in his playing with your fingers.

You're touched that they care so much about you to even agree with what you want let alone agree so quickly. Could this three person situation actually work though? Or have you just made things a whole lot messier for yourself?

••••••••••••••••One Month Later•••••••••••••••

“Babe! Could you tell Ji his client wants to run a few ideas for the song when you get back to CBO please? I've got to go to a meeting in a bit.” You hear Chris call out to you from the shower.

Walking into the steamy room you see his body fully submerged under the spray of the water. You try to scare him but he's fully aware of your presence outside of the glass and he opens one eye in your direction smiling at you.

“Can you also tell him that I can't keep wiping the cameras so you two can fuck in the stairwells. Poor security guard had a front row show last week. I'm still jealous.”

Giggling you lean towards him past the open glass for a kiss that he returns with a groan. “Fuck y/n you know what your laugh and those lips do to me. Keep it up and we won't get any work done and Jisung will be pouty all day.”

“My bad babe, you just look so good wet.” You giggle again and now he's pulling you into the shower with him fully clothed.

You squeal when the warm water soaks the flowy white summer skater dress you had just put on and Chris's mouth is on your neck lapping up the water and nibbling your flesh. His hands are quick lifting the dress up and over your head letting it fall to the tiles in a loud splat just outside the door. His cock is inside of you before your hair is even fully saturated with water. The loud wet sounds and your moans echo throughout the bathroom as Chris holds one of your legs up and fucks you up against the shower wall. Your hands slip and slide over his bare back feeling every muscle shift with his movements.

You let out a loud moan when you hear the door creak open to a heavy lidded Jisung in a black blazer, white tee and jeans, standing there looking into your eyes and watching his girlfriend get fucked by another man. He slowly grins and saunters into the room, eyes still on you until he reaches the counter. There, he continues to watch you, watch Chris's cock quickly slip in and out of your cunt. His grin grows when you struggle to keep your eyes on him and the flush to your cheeks deepen. When you reach your hand out to him he shakes his head and chuckles deep.

“Take his dick like a good girl, lovely. I'm a patient man. I'll fuck you after until your body is dry and your pussy is dripping on my cock.” Jisung says and you feel Chris laugh while he sucks down hard on your breast.

Jisung rubs his hard cock over his pants and your cunt locks down around Chris's length making you both breathe out a soft moan.

“Fuck Sungie.” You whine with a pout, reaching out to him again but he won't be swayed that easy. He's used to waiting his turn while watching you.

“No, no naekkeo I'm not here remember.” He says sitting up on the counter next to the sink, getting comfortable.

Chris begins to thrust into you harder, taking your other leg and wrapping it around his hips. “Mmm, you heard the man baby. Take my cock so he can fuck my cum out of you when I'm gone.”

Chris's words make you shiver all over and you lean your head back onto the wall behind you giving in to the sensations Chris's cock and Jisung's eyes give you. Some days they take turns, some days they share you together but in the end both men would have worshiped your body inside and out. It's been a month now having this strange relationship with your two boyfriends and your heart isn't the only thing that feels full everyday. Sometimes messy isn't always a bad thing.

@resi4skz, @msauthor @thesarcasmqueen-22 @skzworldx @turtledove824 @jisungsbammey @brojustfknkillm3 @rixenluv @cookiesnmilfx @tirena1 @redlikemysoul

Repeat After Me | lmh

❝𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐈 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧 𝐢𝐭, 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭?❞

↳ When bad days bring insecurities to settle and nerves are anxiously aflutter, there’s only one thing that can bring you down.

↳ Female reader x Lee Know

↳ 3.3k

! Strong language, established relationship, essential pw/op, soft dominant Lee Know, body insecurity and dysmorphia, themes of weight insecurity, explicit sexual content, dirty talk, body worship and praise, body positivity, conditioning, breathplay, use of ‘slut’, creampie, adult themes throughout !

「suitable for 18+ readers only」  「© September 2022 by jl-micasea-fics」

“You about done in there, baby?”

Minho’s voice echoes lightly through the apartment, permeating the gently gushing flow of warm shower water that cascades from the silver head.

Work definitely wasn’t kind to you today. Indeed, it seemed to make an explicit point of kicking you about and neglecting the aftercare as one obstacle after another materialised on your already packed schedule, endless additions crawling atop the impressive mountain of paperwork on your desk. Couple that with the depressive state of your lunch more befitting a grazing rabbit than an actual human, your resulting mood left you irritable, fed up, and kind of done with the world.

If it wasn’t for the joy you knew awaited you at home—a slick, suave boyfriend that just happens to have a thing for all the curves and lumpy bits you’re specifically trying to shed with said rabbit diet—you’d be well on your way to the deepest recesses of a bottle of Rioja by now.

For the relief Lee Minho brings is far more effective than any alcohol or narcotic. Indeed, he is the perfect fucking sedative to days like this, and best of all, he knows it.

As an aside, Minho’s never made any secret of the fact that your more abhorrent moods turn him on. Your scowls, your pouts, the extra layer you throw on in your desire for comfort only sparks his desire to rip it all off, to dig beneath and feel the plush, soft canvas of your skin under his hands.

Though you have no need to today, you suppose you can admit to exaggerating your moods here and there. Putting a macabre face on when perhaps you’re not all that tetchy, pouting a little harder when you seek to garner his attentions. And why shouldn’t you, when it works every time? You’re far from noble enough to abstain on throwing a tantrum; especially when the end result is so delicious. Indeed, over the years you’ve been together, Minho has yet to fail in his efforts to lighten your moods, for they are nothing if not fucking enthusiastic.

“Almost,” you call back, sweeping your hands through your sodden hair, spinning slowly under the water, eyes closed in the blissful warmth of relative content.

“Well pick it up, dinner’s ready.”

That’s enough to get you to open your eyes.

“Wh— You cooked?” you balk.

Keep reading

Dance For Us

2chopsticks2eyes - Masterlist

Pairing:

Lee Minho/Lee Know x Fem Reader

Lee Yongbok/Lee Felix x Fem Reader

Hwang Hyunjin x Fem Reader

Lee Yongbok/Lee Felix x Hwang Hyunjin

Themes: Smut… Just a lot of smut

Word Count: ~17k | AO3

Warnings: Smut, Explicit Sexual Content, Alcohol, Cussing, Oral Sex, Hand Jobs, Vaginal Fingering, Blow Jobs, Vaginal Sex, Unprotected Sex, Implied Coercion

Summary: DanceRACHA sees you dancing to ‘Taste’ before their concert and they want a private show. Up close and personal.

Author's Note: This work was inspired by a request from @felixs-voice-makes-me-wanna. It’s been a while since I’ve posted anything so I hope this spicy fic makes up for it.

__________________________________________

It's kind of strange, isn’t it? How anyone, literally anyone could be watching you when you’re in a public setting? Especially when there are hundreds of people surrounding the same area. Creepy almost…

But it doesn’t really help when there’s a circle of people dancing while waiting outside the stadium for the Stray Kids concert to start. You had never realized how supportive other Stays could be of each other and, although you were uncomfortable around a bunch of strangers with no one accompanying you, the others really welcomed you with open arms.

You were surprised with the amount of Stays that had learned the choreography of their idol’s songs and impressed by the quality of it. You were somewhat shy to admit it, but you weren’t a stranger to some of the dances yourself. In fact, there were a number of songs that you were pretty confident you had down to a T.

You couldn’t help it that Stray Kids songs made you want to move your body subconsciously. “Why don’t you get out there? You definitely seem like you want to dance!” You were startled by the guy next to you whom you had befriended while watching everyone. Apparently, you had been slightly dancing to the songs you knew the choreography to and a massive blush spread across your cheeks.

“Oh no no no. I could never…” You chuckled shyly and the guy smirked at you.

“You know that no one is going to judge you here? And if they do, then fuck them anyway.” You looked down and fidgeted with your fingers. You felt a warm hand gently pat your shoulder. “And you know that I will definitely cheer you on!”

You smiled up at him and then fear crossed your face when someone requested ‘Taste’. Fuck. He smiled brightly at you and nudged you to the center of the circle.

“You got this! Fighting!” 

You kept your head down the whole way to stand with a few others that were eager to dance and you tried to focus just on the music as the opening notes rang out.

You had only learned the choreography of all of the songs you memorized of your ultimate bias. Lee Know.

You could never match the amount of precision and finesse that it took to do his part, but it wouldn’t be much easier learning the other’s parts either. Felix with his powerful moves and flexibility that have jaws dropping. Hyunjin with his intensity and how he flows like water in between moves. It was hopeless no matter what, but you always tried your best.

Your nerves were whisked away into the wind once Lee Know’s part started and you trusted your body to move on its own. It seemed like it took you forever to figure out how to look sexy enough to do those moves while you were learning. You didn’t really feel sexy, but now you knew your body well enough to trust it to move how you wanted it to.

The song whisked you away and you didn’t even think twice about all the eyes watching you and the few other Stays that moved in sync along with you. When the song ended and you were gasping for air with sweat dripping down your neck, you heard a loud applause and you crashed back down to reality. 

Your face was blazing red as you shakily bowed your head and you sprinted back to your newfound friend. “Holy shit that was amazing! Why in the world would you want to hold that back?!” He shouted over the masses of cheers.

You just looked down and covered your face, proud that people liked your performance, but embarrassed that people saw you doing something so provocative. “I… I guess I just don't like being watched…” You meekly smiled up at him and he smiled back.

“Well I hate to break it to you, but you’re too pretty for people not to watch.” He cocked a smirk at you and you blushed with a smile as you turned your attention back to the festivities.

- - - - - - - - - -

By the end of the concert, you were sweaty, tired, and out of breath, but you never wanted it to end.

You had managed to grab a ticket right next to the stage and it was so fucking surreal to see your idols so close. You felt like you were hallucinating any time they made eye contact with you and you were sure you had the most idiotic expression of ‘starstruck fangirl’ planted on your face.

The most eye contact, though, was made by the bright smile of Lee Felix. It legitimately felt like you were being basked in sunlight any time he looked at you and you had to keep reminding yourself to keep it together, woman. You weren’t as loud or as attention-hungry as the Stays around you so you had not a single goddamned clue why his eyes kept drifting back to yours.

When they showed a surprise performance of ‘Taste’ you were done for.

Every two seconds, one of the three dancers would make eye contact with you during the set. You basked in the warmth that was Felix’s wide-eyed gaze, felt your body set ablaze when Hyunjin looked at you with the constant sex eyes he donned while performing, and then you were absolutely chilled to the bone when Lee Know looked down at you like a predator analyzing you.

Needless to say, you were concerned for your health.

During the final ment, your eyes were glued to the astounding god-like beauty of Lee Know and his piercing stare seemed to seek out your own gaze as well. Your body was hot all over and when he looked at you, you had the involuntary reaction to look away. It was as if your body was trying to preserve itself by forcing away the eye contact that made your heart beat out of your chest.

You were surely just imagining things. Seeing what your brain wanted you to see. It would all be over soon anyway and it wouldn’t matter anymore.

Except it did matter.

The concert had ended and you really didn’t want to fight all of the Stays that were filing out of the stadium and then lose your mind with the resulting traffic, so you took it slow and hung back. You sat back down in your seat and decided to scroll through your phone as the masses died down and you were surprised that people had already posted photos and videos of that night.

You smiled at the funny and amazing moments that Stay had captured and you even saw some videos of the activities before the show. As you were scrolling, your thumb froze as you came across a video with ‘Taste’ chiming in the background.

No.

Oh no.

Fuckfuckfuck. There you were. Your vulnerability on full display for the world to see.

NO!

You just sat there with your mouth opening and closing like a damned fish and you practically jumped out of your skin when you heard someone clear their throat in front of you, your phone clattering to the ground as you looked up at the huge, buff, and tall security guard. You must have lost track of time on your phone because when you looked around, the stadium was practically empty.

“O-oh god! I’m so sorry!” You quickly stood up after picking up your phone and collected your things. “I’ll leave right away! Sorry!” You were about to make a move to leave but he stopped you with a gentle hand on your shoulder.

You turned around and probably looked like a frightened bunny as you looked up at the man. However, the warm smile he offered immediately eased your worries. “Actually, ma’am. My name is Tyrone. I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to ask you to come with me.”

All traces of color drained from your face in dread of what you could have possibly done. Had you bumped into the wrong person? Were you too scantily dressed? Were you deemed a threat because you stayed too long? “W-w-wha–?!”

“It will be explained soon, I assure you.” His smile was still warm when he cut off your potential of flurrying questions and he stepped to your side with a gentle touch to your upper back to urge you forward to follow him. For a man that looks like he could kill you in his sleep, he sure is gentle.

You followed him through corridor after corridor and your anxiety only swelled further the longer it took and the deeper you ventured into the bowels of the venue. Just as you were about to question exactly where he was taking you, he stopped in front of a non-descript door. Your curiosity started overtaking your fear as he knocked a couple of times and then slowly opened the door, stepping inside and holding it open for you. You briefly gave him a perplexed look and then stepped inside.

It was just an average lounge room. Completely void of any sign of life and you turned around to see the man still standing at the open door. “Um, can I ask what I did, sir?”

For some reason, he nervously chuckled and it threw you for a loop. “Uhh, heh, well to be honest, I don’t really know. I was just told by the higher-ups to bring you here so they could talk to you. I’m not sure what it’s about, I just do what I’m told. Sorry, little lady.” He shrugged and your shoulders fell in defeat. He pointed to the hallway as he put his hand on the doorknob. “I’ll be right outside if you need me, okay? Make yourself comfortable and someone should be with you soon.”

You shyly nodded your head and he flashed that same warm smile before he turned to go back out.

However, right before he exited, he turned his head back. “Oh yeah! I was supposed to ask what year you were born!” Why the fuck did he need to know that? You looked perplexed but you answered nonetheless. He quickly thanked you as he exited and shut the door behind him. How the fuck were you supposed to make yourself comfortable when you were just basically kidnapped?! I mean, you obviously didn’t feel threatened, but that didn’t mean your anxiety wasn’t skyrocketing!

It felt like you were waiting for ages, pacing back and forth across the windowless room as you kept staring at the door.

After about thirty minutes, you heard a tiny knock at the door and you froze in your overly-frantic tracks. You waited a second and then the door hesitantly opened as a blonde-haired head popped in from around the door.

Oh my god. 

OH MY GOD NO FUCKING WAY.

You couldn’t breathe. You couldn’t blink. You couldn’t even conjure a single coherent thought in your head as LEE FUCKING FELIX just waltzed into the room like your whole fucking world didn’t just change at the sight of him.

The door quietly shut behind him as he walked toward you with a blinding smile. “Hi there! I’m Felix!” DID HE JUST FUCKING INTRODUCE HIMSELF?!?! OF COURSE HE IS FELIX!!! THERE’S NOT A SINGLE GODDAMNED SOUL WHO DOESN’T KNOW WHO HE IS!!! HOW DOES AN AUSTRALIAN ACCENT SOUND EVEN MORE BEAUTIFUL WHEN IT’S COMING FROM HIS MOUTH?!?!

He stood there with his hand outstretched for a handshake and your face was surely still in shock as you blindly reached out for it while you were memorizing every little feature on his angelic face. You were broken out of your trance once his skin touched yours and you looked down at where his hand gently held your own.

He squeezed it gently and you involuntarily let out a shaky chuckle. “Hm?” You looked up to see him tilting his head in question. Whether it was wondering your name or why you giggled, you didn’t know, but you decided to answer the latter first.

You chuckled again. “I… I’m sorry. I guess it’s just funny that you introduced yourself…” His face softened from his puzzled expression and he chuckled softly as well.

“Heh, I guess you’re right. I guess you already know my name, huh?” You giggled and nodded your head. He squeezed your hand once more but still didn’t make any move to release it. “However, I haven’t had the pleasure of getting your name…”

You quickly shook yourself out of your mystified trance and your eyes widened. “Oh! Oh my god, I’m being so rude, I’m sorry!” You frantically introduced yourself and squeezed his hand back, shaking it and bowing your head in greeting.

He chuckled at your panicking and placed his other hand on top of the one already in his grasp, you shut up real quick as you looked at his blinding smile that emitted a beautiful, melodic laugh. “You’re not being rude at all! That is a very beautiful name. It is a pleasure to meet you.”

You nervously chuckled and looked at his hands that encapsulated your own. “I-it’s nice to meet you too…” You shyly smiled and blushed, unable to make eye contact as you bore your eyes into his adorable hands. He surely must be feeling your sweaty palm, why isn’t he pulling away?

“You must be wondering why you’re here, am I right, noona? I can call you noona, yes? You’re a ‘97 girl, right?” Your eyes shot up to meet his own as you tentatively nodded your head. He must have asked Tyrone… He smirked as he finally pulled his hands away. Your hand shot to your clothes to wipe the sweat off your hands and ensure everything looked good. You silently watched as he pulled his phone out of his pocket.

As he did so, you only just then realized that he had changed out of his stage clothes and into a comfy-looking t-shirt and shorts. His hair and makeup were still done up, but he definitely looked at least a little bit more comfortable, and you were grateful for it.

You were knocked out of your trance when Felix held his phone out in front of you. Your stomach dropped out of your ass at the mortifying content on his screen. That same fucking video you saw not even an hour ago was displayed right in front of your humiliated face. “This is you, right?”

Your eyes snapped up to him and your whole face lit on fire as you buried your face into your palms. “Oh god!” You whined pitifully.

You felt a gentle hand on your shoulder and you peered at him through your fingers. “What’s wrong???” He sounded alarmed. “I thought it was amazing!” Your eyes blew wide as your hands slowly dropped from your face.

“Wha-what?” You’re sure you sounded braindead from the disbelief in your tone.

He cocked his eyebrow like it was the most obvious thing in existence. Then his face softened when he deciphered your confusion. “Okay, let me correct that statement. We thought it was amazing.”

“WE?! Who’s we?!” Your shyness was overcome by your bewilderment as you practically yelled the words.

He laughed heartily and, again, you were mesmerized at the sight of him. He looked at you endearingly. “Our dance line of course! Minho-hyung, Hyunjinnie, and I recognize talent when we see it. We were surprised to see you right up front during the concert and it was just plain dumb luck that you happened to still be there when we asked for someone to go look for you.”

OKAY, HOLD THE FUCK UP.

There were so many questions running through your head it almost made you dizzy. First off, how in the world could these trained professionals think you were any type of talented? Next, you realized that you weren’t just imagining things when you caught the three of them looking at you during the concert. And lastly… THEY SPECIFICALLY ASKED SOMEONE TO COME AND TAKE YOU TO MEET THEM?!?!

This was unreal. How were you not dreaming right now? Or passed the fuck out?

He must have sensed your internal mental breakdown because he placed a gentle hand on your shoulder. “I’m sorry that we kind of just forced this on you, but Hyunjin and Minho-hyung would really like to meet you…” 

WHAT THE FUCK?! You made the most unattractive choking noise as you gasped and held your hand to your heart, afraid you were about to have a heart attack.

“But if you are uncomfortable with the whole situation, I can have someone take you ba–”

“NO!” Your hands flew to grab him, but you pulled back before you touched him, instead, putting your hands over your mouth in humiliation of your outburst.

He just laughed heartily and moved to put his other hand on your other shoulder. You were dead. There was no way to survive this. Lee Felix was holding you to face him and you were stunned speechless. “Does that mean you are okay with meeting them?”

You could do nothing but nod your head profusely, almost enough to damage your neck. He kept laughing at you and you couldn’t bring yourself to give two fucks about it. You probably looked pathetic at how much you were panicking…

“Well, then!” He pulled out his phone again and typed out a message, the following *bloop* from his phone indicating he sent a text. “They’re on their way!”

“Oh my gosh…” Your mouth involuntarily let out a sliver of your thoughts and you felt his hands lightly squeeze your shoulders before releasing you.

He offered a meek smile. “They wanted me to come first so you would be more comfortable. I guess I didn’t do a great job, huh?” He rubbed the back of his neck nervously and you waved your hands in front of you in protest.

“No no! You’re doing great! It’s just hard to relax when… well… it’s you! Like, you must know the effect you have on people!” It should be entirely obvious that anyone who would be able to meet them would go certifiably insane.

“Oh? And what effect do I have on you?” He stepped forward slightly with a crooked smile and it was a goddamned miracle you didn’t faint. The way he lowered his voice to negative decibels didn’t help one bit.

Was he…? No. Nope. Nuh uh, you needed to pull your brain out of delulu land RIGHT NOW. It was a simple question, nothing more.

“U-uh… I-I… I…” You couldn’t find the ON switch to your brain and you were panicking again.

And as if it couldn’t get any worse, the two of you turn to the door when you both hear the fidgeting of the doorknob. For some reason, that’s all it was. The knob was twisting and turning and then you and Felix watched as someone slammed into the door and Hyunjin came stumbling in.

He cursed under his breath and then stood up straight with a smile on his face once he saw you. As he came in, Lee Know walked in after him guffawing and pointing at him. He cackled a speedy sentence in Korean and you looked at Felix in confusion.

Felix started laughing too as Hyunjin made a sour face and turned to you. “The door was jammed and he was having a breakdown trying to force it open.” Felix cracked up and Hyunjin punched his arm while angrily murmuring something Korean under his breath.

You felt a tiny bit more at ease as you giggled behind your hand.

However, that was short-lived once the two newly arrived men turned their attention towards you. Your smile morphed into one of trepidation real quick.

Hyunjin and Lee Know bowed their heads in tandem in greeting, and then Hyunjin shook his head, as if coming out of a stupor, and stepped forward to offer his hand. Again, you tentatively grasped his hand and he squeezed it with a light shake, releasing it afterward unlike the life-threatening grasp of Felix.

“Hi! I’m Hyunjin!” Felix snorted out a half chuckle and you looked down with a shy, amused smile as well, knowing he was thinking the same thing you were about the introduction. “What? What did I say?” You shook your head and offered a small smile.

“Nothing! Nothing!” You bit your lip to hold back your grin. “I… I’m honored to meet you…” You bowed your head to him and then looked to Lee Know to do the same.

You instantly regretted your eye contact with the man behind Hyunjin because his gaze was sharp and piercing and you felt like you were just stabbed in the chest. Your expression faltered and all of the blood in your body rushed to your face.

You could have sworn you saw a smirk cross his features, but he quickly offered a tight-lipped smile and waved at you, making no moves to come closer as the other two had. “Hi, I’m Lee Know.”

You offered a shaky smile and waved back. Damn your trembling arm to hell. “H-hi…” You introduced your name to both of them and then looked down to the ground, unable to bring yourself to make eye contact any longer than you had to.

You heard Minho speak and you raised your head only slightly when he said something in Korean that almost sounded like… cooing? You heard the other two chuckle and then you really looked up, once again, looking to Felix for answers.

He smirked and then mischievously eyed Minho. “Hyung thinks you’re cute~” He said in a sing-songy voice.

“YAH!” Minho angrily stepped forward and Felix ran behind you while laughing, holding you in front of him by your arms as your eyes blew wide and your heart started racing. That’s it. You were dead. No other explanation made sense. 

While Hyunjin doubled over, absolutely howling with laughter, Minho just stared at you with an unreadable expression as your face, once again, turned into a tomato. Surely they are fucking with you. There is no way in hell that this adonis of a man thought you were any type of attractive.

Still, with a completely expressionless face, Minho sighed in tiny English. “Dance for us.”

Your jaw must have completely detached and dropped to the ground like a damned cartoon character because the look on his and Hyunjin’s faces was pure amusement.

Felix quickly walked around to stand in front of you again, attempting to do damage control. “What he means to say…” He rolled his eyes at the elder. “-is that we want to see your performance ourselves. Minho-hyung is our dance leader and he was just about insistent to see if you have any other… skills to show us…” He almost seemed nervous asking the question.

Why was he nervous? If anyone should be nervous, it should be you! You frantically shook your head. “Nononono! I couldn’t possibly… I can’t… I’m not… I-I…” You were terrified that they would even think to ask such a thing. “I am nowhere near as amazing as you guys!” Minho huffed and you looked over to see him roll his eyes and mutter something Korean under his breath. You felt your heart shatter at his disappointment.

You instantly stiffened when you felt an arm wrap around your shoulders from your right. And when you looked over, you stopped breathing. Hyunjin’s face was right fucking next to yours and his smile was stupidly attractive as he looked down at you. “Come on! It’ll be fun!” He lightly squeezed you and you wanted to crawl into a hole and die when a tiny squeak escaped your mouth.

You sucked in your lips and you clenched your eyes shut to hide your horrified expression. You expected teasing, laughing, anything, but all you heard was silence. When you opened your eyes again, you were taken off guard to see that they had gotten closer to you and all three had an expression that looked like they would eat you alive.

Minho stepped up right in front of your face and you felt your bones tremble. He gently grasped your hand in his own and looked deep into your eyes. “Please.” How was it that this man could ask such a vulnerable question, and yet make it sound like a command? He had you ensnared in his gorgeous eyes and there was no chance of escaping.

…but honestly, you couldn’t care less.

“O-okay…” You shakily whispered. An evil sneer morphed onto his face at your meek word of relent. 

“Good.” Your eyes widened from the cocky tone in his voice and your eyes followed him as he released your hand and made his way to the door, exiting casually with a friendly nod to Tyrone whom you could see standing just beyond the threshold.

You looked at the tall man still holding you with confusion written on your features. “Why is he leaving?” You almost wanted to cry due to having such a short time with him.

Hyunjin flashed a gorgeous smile, but Felix was the one to speak up and you turned to him. “We can’t do it here, love. We can’t stay in the building all night.” ALL NIGHT?!?! “We’ll sneak you up to hyung’s room so we won’t be bothered.”

You stopped breathing. He called you love. He said all night. He said Minho’s ROOM.

You almost felt sick from the nerves you were feeling. Why, of all people, did they want you to accompany them? And even further, take you back to their room???... “W-wait… you mean his hotel room?!” There was no holding back the disbelief in your voice and Hyunjin chuckled.

When you turned back to look at him, he was even closer to your face (if that was even possible at this point). “You don’t have to if you don’t want to, pretty girl. We just don’t have any other options. We need to make sure we keep you a secret.” He winked and you could tell he was trying to hypnotize you with those damned sex eyes, but you couldn’t even bring yourself to put up a fight. Especially since you could feel him gently caress your arm with the hand he had wrapped around you.

You had to close your eyes and face the floor to collect your thoughts and learn how to speak again. “O-okay… let’s… let’s go…” You exhaled heavily from the amount of air you were holding back and you felt a small hand on your left grasp onto your own.

You heard a gleeful noise from your right. “I’m so excited! Let’s go!” Hyunjin released you and skipped off out the door and down the hall.

Your face must have shown your thoughts because the man holding your hand decided to poke at the worried crease between your eyebrows. “You doing okay in there?” He had an amused smile but you could still see the concern behind his eyes.

Your heart swelled. He really is the world’s best friend, isn’t he? “I’ll be fine. This is all just… a lot.” You nervously chuckled and he squeezed your hand tighter.

“I’m sure it is pretty stressful. If at any point you feel uncomfortable or overwhelmed, just say the word and we can take you home.” You offered a small smile and he returned it. “Okay, well. Let’s get to it. I’m sure they’re already waiting.” And with that, he walked you down the hall, hand in hand, to get ready to head out.

- - - - - - - - - -

You were pretty upset that the rest of the guys had already headed out and you didn’t get the chance to meet them, but you were already blessed beyond compare to even get this far, so you didn’t share your complaints with the three.

They paid for a cab to take you to their hotel and you entered separately from them to hide suspicion and, before you knew it, you were in the hotel elevator with three of the most drop-dead gorgeous creatures you had ever seen.

That was probably the slowest elevator in existence and yet too quick for your liking. You stood on one side, probably looking like a cornered baby gazelle while three hungry lions stood on the other side dissecting you with their eyes. How you would ever be able to get your body to dance for them, you didn’t know.

When the elevator bell dinged to indicate its arrival, you involuntarily jumped out of your skin. Hyunjin and Felix tried to hold back their chuckle, but Minho just cackled and patted your head as he waltzed out of the elevator as if he wasn’t leading you to your demise.

They didn’t even say a word as Minho nonchalantly unlocked the door and the three of you followed him in. You probably looked pathetic. Your arms were tucked in on yourself and your shoulders were tense. You probably looked super tiny in this unnecessarily large room. Unfortunately plenty of room to dance.

Hyunjin and Minho plopped down on the huge couch in the middle of the room and looked at you expectantly as you idiotically stayed frozen in the corridor and Felix closed and locked the door behind you. “Yah.” Minho exclaimed and then motioned to the large space in front of them. It should seem rude, but the look in his eyes didn’t scream malevolent. He just simply didn’t seem to know how to convey what he wanted.

Felix gave him an exasperated look and then turned back to smile at you. “It’s okay, love. We just want to check out your skills firsthand.”  All you could do was nod your head obediently, words completely evading your comprehension, as you set down your small clutch purse and stepped up in front of them.

“Um, do you need to take my phone or anything? I know you guys are probably worried about secrecy and all of that sooo….” 

Felix offered a fond smile. “Are you planning on telling anyone?” Your eyes popped open and you shook your head profusely. “Then we’re all good! We’ve never really done this before, but we trust you, noona. We are pretty good judges of character.”

Why? Why would they trust a completely random Stay? Of course, you want what’s best for them and they haven’t done anything to make you uncomfortable… well… not in an unwelcome way, but you are afraid of what could happen to them if they trusted the wrong person.

Hyunjin smirked as he stood up and walked to the mini-fridge. His eyes scorched you with their intensity as he returned to the couch with a bottle of wine and a couple of the hotel’s cups, tongue peeking out the corner of his lips as he assessed you. “Do you mind if we drink, angel? We just had a long day and we need to take the edge off.”

“N-no, I don’t mind…” You sounded incredibly small and he flashed his cocky open smile before pouring him and the others a cup.

You watched as the three took a sip, your eyes following the bob of Minho’s Adam's apple as he gulped and you found yourself taking a dry swallow too. Once you finally regained the ability to think about anything other than the dangerous thoughts lurking in your head, you looked up and realized he was boring his eyes into you as he calmly sat down the cup across the coffee table, making a gesture from you to the cup.

You had no clue what he wanted from you. Did he want you to fill it up even more for him? “Huh?” You hated to sound dumb, but you were probably already getting there with the way Minho clicked his tongue in frustration and picked the cup back up. He reluctantly stood from the couch, leaving the other two men to sit and watch your movements like a hawk as he stepped around the table and stood only a foot’s length away from your face.

Without looking away from your frightened eyes, he calmly spoke “Do you want some?” Your eyes widened and you about fainted when Minho flashed a crooked smile of amusement and cocked an eyebrow.

“Wha– I–”

“Hyung knows a lot more English than he likes to let on. He just doesn’t want to have to talk.” Hyunjin rolled his eyes while explaining. “It might help you relax? But you don’t have to if you don’t want any.” You looked down at the cup that Minho was holding up in between your bodies and then back up at his eyes.

He tilted his head with a smile that would normally seem innocent but looked almost teasing on his face. Never straying your eyes from his, you gingerly retrieved the cup from his hand and pulled it to your mouth. He didn’t move a muscle as you tilted back with eyes closed and appreciated the smooth, bittersweet beverage from the cup of the man that had just drank from it.

When you finished your sip and opened your eyes, you were beyond flustered to see that he was looking at your mouth. You couldn’t breathe as you licked the remaining wine off of your lips and watched as he moistened his own as well. When he looked back up to make eye contact, he smirked. “Good girl.”

GOOD GIRL?!?! DID LEE MINHO JUST CALL YOU ‘GOOD GIRL’?!?! You were dead. You could die then and there and be happy.

Unbeknownst to you, that was just the beginning.

Without reclaiming his cup, he stepped back and went to plop back down in his spot on the couch. You just stood there with wide eyes and jaw dropped as you saw them look at you with amusement. “You’re adorable, you know?” Hyunjin leaned forward and propped his elbows up on his knees. He then tilted his head and cutely asked, “Can I keep you?”

Fuck.

“Yah, Jinnie. Stop scaring the poor girl.” Felix grumbled and then turned back to your trembling form. “Ignore him, we just want to see you dance. Maybe even help you out if you’d let us.” He winked at you and you blushed furiously.

Fuck it. You downed the rest of the contents in the cup in one go because you needed all of the liquid courage you could get. When you sat the cup back down in front of Minho, he leaned forward, mimicking Hyunjin’s position, and smiled mischievously at you. You had to force yourself out of the grasp his eyes had you locked in.

“Um… what did you guys want to see me dance to?”

“You know more than one?!” Hyunjin’s eyes blew out and he grasped his heart dramatically. You couldn’t control the giggle from his antics and they all smiled at you, Minho attempting to hide his own grin behind his refilled cup.

“Yeah… I know a lot of them. You can choose one and I’ll see if I know the dance…” The three of them looked at you in amazement and disbelief at your words.

They continued talking for a moment amongst themselves and you, with no knowledge of what they were saying, just stood there looking at your restless feet. “Do you know the choreo for District 9?”

Shit. That was probably the most difficult one!

Still, you did know it…

You nervously chuckled. “Uhhh yeah, but I’ll probably be awful at it. It’s not an easy one.”

Felix and Hyunjin had giddy smiles while Minho looked at you with scrutiny. “Who’s part do you know?” Hyunjin looked at you with wide eyes.

You blushed furiously. Will they know your bias just by your answer? Surely not, right? Still, you were shy to admit it. You looked down as you twiddled your thumbs, unable to look at them as you answered. “Minho– I-I mean Lee Know…” You chanced a look up at him and he looked like he was trying to hide his smile once again.

“I want to see it!” Hyunjin raised his hand excitedly and eagerly looked at his other members. They both nodded as Minho pulled out his phone, his Anya sticker even more unrecognizable than the last time you saw him post a picture with it. He laid it in front of him with the song ready to play and then he held out an open palm to gesture to the floor, seemingly to order you into position.

You quickly complied and got into formation, which you quickly realized was a rather promiscuous position for a female dressed in fishnets and a skirt. Hey, don’t judge! it’s not every day you get to dress up for a concert! It was especially risque when you basically had your crotch aimed right at the ethereal beings in front of you. You tried to sit where you weren’t completely flashing them, but you looked really awkward doing it. You took a long, deep breath as you closed your eyes and then let your body take over once the song started.

Of course, it took an insane amount of concentration and willpower, but the more you got into it, the more confident you became. You knew you could do it as long as you imagined yourself just practicing regularly in your bedroom rather than in front of three of the most gorgeous men in the world that had probably already seen a full view of your panties at some point in the dance.

When the song was over, you stayed in formation until the three of them stood up and started applauding. You were dewy with sweat and your breathing was out of control, but you couldn’t help but feel partly proud of yourself and partly terrified of their critiques.

Hyunjin and Felix came to you on each side and hugged you tightly while slightly lifting you off the ground. You giggled as they hollered at you and Minho had his hands in his pockets in front of you with a smirk.

When they put you down, they kissed both sides of your cheeks in tandem and your soul felt like it had ascended to heaven. You looked at the two, completely gobsmacked, as they stood in front of you with bright smiles.

Hyunjin giggled. “That was amazing!”

“You really are an amazing dancer, noona!” Felix took your hand and squeezed it, which prompted Hyunjin to do the same with your other hand.

And, completely unexpectedly, Felix flashed an evil grin.

“Sooo, based on the video and this dance, I can only assume that Minho-hyung is your favorite among us?” The two in front of you looked back at the unassuming man that had sat back down.

You looked away when you felt all the blood rush to your face. The two cackled and Hyunjin said something in Korean to Minho. “Hey! Don’t tell him!”

“Too late, love. Like we said, he probably already knows what’s being said, anyway” The two boys released your hands and your face was mortified as you looked at Minho.

You were surprised to see that the tips of his ears were tinged in red and he had grabbed the wine bottle to fill up his cup once again. Hyunjin sounded patronizing when he rambled off something to Minho and the tallest received a threatening glare from the dance leader.

When you looked back at Felix, he looked like he was deep in thought. Then abruptly, it looked like a lightbulb went off in his head. “Hey, noona! Since you know hyung’s choreography to ‘Taste’, can Hyunjin and I dance it with you?!” Your heart dropped out of your ass, but by the look of the two boy’s pleading faces, you didn’t have it in you to refuse.

Again, you chuckled nervously. “I-I guess I can give it a shot…” They basically jumped for joy and Minho was already scrolling through his phone for the song. The other two got into position which prompted you to do the same as you calmed down your breathing and tried to not panic.

You heard the opening notes and it was a lot harder to concentrate when you knew they were dancing with you. Still, you did your best to represent the man you were performing for that had concentration written all over his features.

However, a little way into the song, you panicked.

Fuck. Shit. Fuck. Your move was supposed to have you splay your hand out over Hyunjin’s chest and waist but… there was no way in this goddamned universe that you could feel confident enough to touch him like that.

You didn’t want to overstep any boundaries, so you just hovered your hands over the correct areas. When you checked Minho’s expression, he had sat back against the cushions with his arms crossed and a cocked eyebrow.

Shit.

You could tell the others noticed too as the three of you continued to dance with their eyes bored into you.

Once the song ended, you were afraid to meet eyes with any of them. That was until you heard the velvety voice from the couch chime your name.

You snapped your head up to look at him, not expecting him to address you directly, and you realized he was walking right up to you. He spewed off something in Korean to the other two and then he gently grasped your hand. Holy fuck he’s touching me…

He guided you behind the two men that had lined up and you knew exactly what he was up to.

In the same dance formation, he grabbed your hand and wrapped it over the two men as he firmly pressed your full palm to Hyunjin’s chest, doing the same with your other hand on his abdomen. “Okay?” Minho said, still pressing your hands against the other’s chest.

You dumbly nodded and a tiny whimper escaped on your exhale. Your eyes bulged out as they all looked at you with raised eyebrows. “O-oh god, I’m so sorry!” You quickly pulled back your hands and held them over your mouth in humiliation.

“Don’t worry, love! Do you just feel uncomfortable touching us?” Felix said tentatively as if you would run away at the slightest movement. 

“I… I… I just don’t feel like I should be allowed to…” You looked down with a nervous chuckle and clasped your hands together in front of you. Without any words, you saw two lithe hands grasp your own as they detangled them. You looked up to see Hyunjin standing in front of you as he pulled your hands up to his chest.

“You can touch me all you want, pretty girl.” Hyunjin winked seductively and your eyes popped out of their sockets for the umpteenth time that night. “Are you okay with this?” Again, you were completely numb as you nodded your head, all of your focus committed to the feeling of his warm chest through his shirt under your hands.

He hummed lowly as he slowly moved your hands to press against his abs. Your eyes peered back up to see his expression and he was biting his lip with black eyes staring down at you.

You unintentionally moved your hands back up to his chest and balled your fists in his shirt with a gasp when you felt Felix wrap his arm around your waist. “You can touch any of us, really…” You felt like a caged mouse when he propped his chin up on your shoulder and your inner thoughts conjured the lewdest thoughts. “I was wondering… what could Hyunnie and I do to convince you to change your bias?” The thickly accented whisper sent shivers down your spine.

You looked at Hyunjin who had a dangerous smile, and then Minho who looked at you with dark, hungry eyes. It was as if he was giving you a nonverbal warning. You couldn’t help but want to rile him up.

You had NO CLUE how to read this situation, they couldn’t possibly be…? No… not possible, get your damned head out of the gutter.

That assumption was quickly rectified when Hyunjin slowly smoothed his hands over your hips and pulled you flush to him. “What about this?” He whispered mere centimeters from your face. You probably looked terrified, but the way your body involuntarily arched into him made him cockily smirk.

You could feel Felix’s arm tighten around you and he whispered his hot breath in your ear. “Or this?” That was when you felt the warm, wet press of his lips against the back of your neck. You loudly gasped, still in front of Hyunjin’s face, but your eyes closed from the sensation. Felix was still right next to your ear, but his voice sounded worried. “Is this okay, love? We can have someone take you home if you feel uncomfortab–”

“No!” Your arms wrapped around Hyunjin’s neck instinctively and they squeezed you as they softly laughed at your reaction. You had looked around the two to see that Minho had returned to the couch and was watching the three of you with an unreadable expression while sipping his wine.

“Well, in that case, I think I could convince you a bit more, yeah?” Hyunjin displayed that same fucking tongue prodding at his lips while he smiled at your frozen form that was locked in his eye contact. You knew your heart was beating out of your chest when Hyunjin looked down at your moistened lips and started leaning down to your face.

Surely he’s not… is he? No fucking way.

He touched his lips down on yours and if it weren’t for their strong grip on you, you would have melted into the floor. He was kissing you. HWANG FUCKING HYUNJIN WAS KISSING YOU!!!

You were as still as a statue, but he urged you to kiss back. And who were you to deny him?

Your lips started hesitantly gliding against his hungry ones and your arms tightened around his neck. He groped your hips more firmly as he pulled you even tighter against him. You heard a click of a tongue somewhere in the room and when Hyunjin pulled back, his cocky smile landed on Minho who was glaring daggers at him from the couch. 

You had no clue how to read the situation and, honestly, you were done trying to figure out these enigmatic men. Best to just go with the flow, right?

Before Hyunjin turned his attention back to you, your breath was stolen from you when Felix snatched you from his arms. Hyunjin whined and said something pouty in Korean, but Felix paid no attention to him. Instead, he guided you by your hips to sit on the sofa next to Minho.

You were shocked to see that he was almost as flustered as you were at the unexpected action, but you couldn’t look at him for long before Felix propped his knee up next to your leg and leaned over you to capture your lips. The kiss was a lot more sweet and gentle than Hyunjin’s had been.

That was until Felix made the first plunge to try and deepen the kiss with his tongue running over your lips. After you welcomed the intrusion, that sweet persona was nowhere to be found and you were blessed to see Lee Yongbok in his carnal form. His hands were cupping your jaw and he pressed your lips against his firmly with gnashing teeth and tongues.

When you finally remembered that there were two other people watching you, your lips froze. Felix pulled back to assess you, but then instantly wore a cocky smirk when he saw your blush and your wandering eyes over at the other two with your head hung low.

“What is it, love? Don’t like an audience, or do you not like any of this?” Felix tried to move to catch your eyes and catch them he did. You stared up at the man towering over you and you could see stars in his eyes. How could you say no to such a man? Well… men…

“I… I like this…” You couldn’t look him in the eye to admit it, instead, turning your head to look at the empty cups on the table. You knew your face was burning up and your attention was redirected as Hyunjin scrambled onto the other side of the couch to lean across Minho. 

“Felix, it’s not fair for you to steal her like that!” Hyunjin basically completely ignored Minho’s protests when he scrambled across the elder’s lap to try and steal another kiss. Just as his lips touched down on your cheek, the man stumbled to the floor. “Ow! Hyuuung!” He whined.

Minho sat next to you, seemingly very proud of himself for thwarting Hyunjin’s advances, as he caught you staring at him. Your face burned and you bit your lip while looking down at your hands again. Felix stopped hovering over you so he could try and get the limp, overdramatic man off the ground.

When you looked up, you saw that Minho was still looking at you with an ‘I will murder you in your sleep’ type of expression and your eyes widened in fear and anticipation. Before the other boys had returned their attention to you, Minho deftly moved closer to your trembling body.

You could swear you were hyperventilating when the man leaned in close to tower over you as you slid down to cower against the cushions. His expression was ravenous and yet there was a hint of apprehension to it. It wasn’t long before you had backed all the way up to the arm of the couch and his arms caged your head in against the cushions you had fallen back onto.

However, before he actually even touched you, his eyes searched yours. His breath stuttered momentarily before he breathed out in a low voice. “Is this okay?” 

Your breath hitched and you couldn’t think about anything but the man over you. His eyes were beautiful and lustful and his tongue peeked out to moisten his plump lips. He was so motherfucking beautiful you wanted to cry. What had you done to be blessed with such close proximity to a specimen such as him? Hell, even this whole situation in general was too good to be true!

You numbly nodded and then stupidly asked, “Is it okay with you?” 

You wanted to slap yourself silly once he giggled down at you, but you quickly got over it when his strong hand reached up to your face and tucked your hair behind your ear. He pushed the hair off your neck when he lowered his face down to your ear. “Yes, jagiya.”

That’s it, you were done. How the hell was he not committing manslaughter by saying shit like that? Your breathing alone could kill you, not to mention your heart!

When you felt the warm, wet press of lips to your jaw, a completely inhuman noise came from your mouth. The universe was both against you and in your favor simultaneously. You heard a chuckle and the lips against your skin grinned at the embarrassing noise, and when Minho looked up at you, you decided that your embarrassment was worth it.

He looked like he wanted to eat you. But as he leaned in to finally press his lips to yours, Hyunjin tackled him, shoving the elder off of your melted body before you could even get a whisper of a touch of the eldest’s lips. Felix quickly swooped in and stole you from their wrestling.

He gently stood you up and dragged you away from them, taking your hand and leading you to the giant bed in the center of the room. He sat down on the plush duvet with your hand in his small ones as you stood in front of him. He bit his lip and almost looked shy for a half second, but soon a bright smile spread across his face and he let your hand go. Instead, he wrapped his arms around your waist to pull you between his parted legs.

While still sitting in front of you, he pressed up against you and nuzzled his face right up in your goddamned pubic bone. 

At that point, you knew your panties were fucked. 

He looked up at you when a shaky breath escaped your lips. His smile was blinding. “Do you mind if we play with you tonight, love?” He emphasized the word ‘play’ to let you know that he didn’t just mean any fucking Monopoly game or some shit. They wanted you.

His voice was sickly sweet and you gasped as you felt a pair of hands, seemingly Hyunjin’s hands, come in behind you to start rubbing up your abdomen to your bra line as he kissed his way down your neck to the collar of your sheer blouse, teasing the material with his teeth. They weren’t necessarily crossing any lines, not by any of your own standards anyway, but they made sure to not overwhelm you.

I mean, yeah, you were definitely overwhelmed, but in the best of ways. You were pretty sure they could fucking curbstomp you and you would thank them and ask for seconds. 

“I…” God, why were you so timid? “I… I like playing…” You said before biting your lip and looking away with a cherry-red face.

When you turned away, you could have sworn you caught a glimpse of Minho ‘adjusting’ himself off to the side. Maybe you weren’t the only one desperate for touch…

The boys caging you in ended up regaining your attention when you felt the hands on your abdomen move to unbutton your shirt. You whimpered when you felt Hyunjin’s hands finally graze up your bare stomach and eventually cresting the curve of your breasts to grope over the material of your bra, his hot breath continuing to fan over the sensitive skin of your neck all the while.

Your upper body unintentionally leaned back into him as he continued his assault on your neck. However, Felix wouldn’t let you get far as he, too, had a strong grip on your hips, and your arms gravitated to rest on top of the blonde’s shoulders. You could feel his hands reach around to grope your ass and you just about went limp from their firm holds on you. You could just lay there all day and let them do whatever the fuck they wanted to.

You mewled when Felix lowered his head again, this time completely burying his face in between your legs as he nuzzled over your clothed core. That, plus Hyunjins rock hard dick pressing into your ass made you whine pathetically. You heard a chuckle from the couch and saw Minho leaning back on it again.

He laughed at your obvious desperation and you whined again. The boys that were torturing you maintained their stance, not moving any further and Minho bit his lip. You could definitely confirm he was palming himself now as he walked up to you and grabbed your chin with one hand.

“Yongbok-ah?” He murmured while never straying his eyes from yours. You felt the movement on your core stop and Minho, very slowly and deeply with his velvety voice said another sentence you couldn’t understand. 

Felix spoke up with a chuckle and Minho kept his eyes locked on yours while the younger one translated. “Hyung said that Jinnie and I could try all we want, but he won’t let the night end until he has convinced you that you belong to only him.”

Your breath was shaky and you squealed when he moved in and you finally got to taste those beautiful, plump lips. His tongue tasted sweet from the wine and you groaned in ecstasy. You were in heaven and you refused to ever come down.

You were ripped from your brief bliss when Hyunjin took matters into his own hands and dragged you away by your waist. Before you knew it, Hyunjin had lifted you onto the bed and your head was laid comfortably on the plush pillows.

Hyunjin had the devil’s laugh on his face as he crawled up to hover over you. “Just relax, angel. I’ll show you who you really want.” Hyunjin’s playful smile was replaced with hunger and he tentatively grasped the remaining unbuttoned part of your shirt, hinting at a question. You immediately sat up and took it the rest of the way off.

Once you were back down, his lips eagerly attacked the swell of your breast as his hands fumbled behind you to remove your mesh bra. When he finally deciphered the way to unlatch it, you moaned when he latched his mouth onto your nipple, lithe fingers playing with the other.

While he had his head down, you saw Felix walk over from where he and Minho had moved to stand at the foot of the bed. His eyes were glued to your breasts and the man devouring them until he reached the head of the bed where you were looking up at him with heavy lids and a lustful moan on the tip of your tongue. 

He caressed your cheek and smiled at you when you whined from his thumb running over your bottom lip. “So sweet…” He propped his hand up by your head as he bent over to lazily kiss you, the action getting more and more needy with each passing second. You felt Felix’s small hand replace Hyunjin’s on the breast that he wasn’t sucking the life out of and he squeezed it in earnest.

You cried out when Felix moved down as well and then you had a pair of lips on both of your breasts. You scrunched your eyes from the intense arousal you were feeling, and when you opened them again, Minho was looking straight into your eyes with crossed arms and a raised brow that almost seemed like he was challenging you.

God, you were so gone.

You gasped when you felt a hand glide up your inner thigh and under your skirt to cup over your clothed mound and start palming it, bringing sweet pressure to where you were aching profusely. Hyunjin then raised his head to yours and breathed against your lips when he brought his hand back up and thumbed at the waistband of your skirt. “Is this okay, noona?”

You nodded your head frantically, breath obviously picking up, and he quickly followed through, hastily sliding his slim fingers under the waistband of the offending clothing and shucking them, your fishnet tights, and your lace panties off of you. You felt red all over from the fact that you were stripped down completely naked for these three men that hadn’t even removed a shred of clothing.

Feeling a bit self-conscious, especially because Felix also relented his attack and they all three were gawking at you, you squeezed your legs shut and involuntarily crossed an arm over your breasts and the other over your stomach. You wanted to keep going, you just wished they wouldn’t just stand there and stare.

“Hey, hey, I’m sorry, noona.” The ray of sunshine noticed your discomfort and gently caressed your bare thigh. “You are just so beautiful, we can’t help but stare. Are you still alright?” It warmed your heart that Felix was still focused on your comfort after all of this and you gave him a shy smile when you nodded. He had to bite back his giddy grin and he quickly removed his shirt, Hyunjin received the hint and did the same right after.

And holy hell. It was just so unfair to be that insanely gorgeous.

Hyunjin lowered himself back down over you with a cocky grin. “Now who’s staring?”

Your face burst into flames and you looked away with a small “S-sorry”. He just chuckled and grabbed your chin to look back at him. “I didn’t say I minded. You can look all you want.” He licked his lips hungrily. “You can touch too…” He said as he grabbed your hand to glide over his naked abdomen. His voice turned to a whisper in your ear. “...anywhere you want…” His hand dragged your own down the length of his stomach and then splayed your palm out over the crotch of his pants to feel his prominent bulge.

OH. MY. GOD.

“You did this to me, noona…” He whispered again, pressing your palm against his tumescence more firmly to reiterate. You gasped in response and kept your hand there when he slowly released you. “Do you want to help me take care of it?” His low voice, his hooded eyes, his everything was dripping in the personification of sex and you tentatively pressed your palm against him again and he groaned into your neck. “Fuck… that’s it…”

His hand landed on your upper thigh and you started hyperventilating. That was until Felix captured your mouth again in another powerful kiss and distracted you from your obvious panic. However, your mouth gaped open against his as you emitted a loud moan when Hyunjin’s fingers found your clit.

“Oh fuck, noona… You’re so wet for us, baby…” You could hear Hyunjin’s voice drift down your body as you continued to tangle tongues with the youngest of the three. This boy has been working on his English dirty talk, hasn’t he? However, you unintentionally unlatched yourself and threw your head back with a loud moan when you felt Hyunjin’s warm mouth close around your clit and start sucking.

Felix elected to focus his efforts elsewhere as well and he properly climbed onto the bed next to you as he returned his mouth to your nipples. You were whining and writhing beneath the ministrations of the both of them and they both firmly gripped your hips still. 

You quickly realized that your eyes had fluttered shut in the heat of the moment and you snapped them open again, not wanting to miss a single moment of this batshit crazy experience.

However, when you opened your eyes, you immediately latched them onto the man at the end of the bed. Minho had the most predatory glare on his face and he didn’t even try to hide the fact that he was palming himself while looking at you. You bit your lip and whimpered when he finally dipped his hand under the waistband of his sweatpants and let his jaw slightly fall open as he worked himself up.

Abruptly, without warning, you half groaned, half whined when you felt Hyunjin’s long, lithe finger slip into you and you couldn’t control it when your hips bucked up into his face. He chuckled against your core and then raised his smiling and slick wet face to look at you. “Does that feel good, baby?” 

You couldn’t speak, you just nodded your head frantically.

You shrieked when Felix nipped your swollen nipple and soothed it with his tongue when he looked back up at you. “Jinnie asked you a question, love. Be a good girl and answer him, yeah?”

“Yes! Oh my god, yes…” Your voice was wistful and fucked out as your hips kept moving on their own accord.

“These fingers are nothing compared to what I have in store for you…” Hyunjin looked at your body with hungry eyes as he wet his lips. “But, first, I wanna see how much I can make you fall apart…”

And without further ado, he plunged down into your cunt again with vigor as Felix reattached himself to your lips and his hands gained purchase on your breasts. His tongue snaked its way into your mouth while Hyunjin’s sneaked its way into your folds. Your breathing was erratic, and your kiss with Felix turned into more of a breathy moan against his lips.

Eventually, Felix’s kisses moved their way down to your neck and then back to your nipples. He apparently was really fixated on them that night. You looked back up to see that all the while Minho was unabashedly getting closer, having his hand moving at a slow, steady pace inside his pants.

One of your lifeless hands was suddenly being gently maneuvered by Felix to press your palm against the tent in his sweats and you gasped at the heat that emitted from his bulge. A random bout of courage was pulled out of your lust-ridden brain and you used both hands to clumsily untie his waistband, resulting in the man sitting up to stare at you in wonder. You looked up at him with pleading eyes in a silent request for their removal, pulling at both his pants and his underwear.

All he responded with was a blinding smile and chaste kiss to your lips before scrambling off the bed to remove said items. And, man, that lean boy did not disappoint…

However, in the process of doing that, Hyunjin advanced his efforts tenfold and you started to feel your core start to snap. One of your hands flew to tangle in his soft locks as you pulled him ever closer to you in an attempt to chase your high. He definitely knew what he was doing. One last flick of his tongue and a particularly delicious press of his fingers against your g-spot had you seeing stars as you came all over Hwang Hyunjin’s face.

Your head was thrown back in a silent cry (no pun intended) as he led you through your orgasm with lazy pumps of his fingers and when he retreated and you came back to reality, you wanted to crawl in a hole and die from embarrassment.

All three men were breathing heavily with blown-out eyes as they stared at you in awe of your orgasm. You didn’t have much time to soothe the reddening of your face because Felix abruptly jumped on top of you and devoured your lips. The fact that this gorgeous creature was completely butt-ass-naked on top of you with his leaking cock pressed up against your hip was making you dizzy and your hands moved on their own when you realized that you wanted nothing more than to feel him.

His mouth groaned against yours when you pressed your cupped palm over his erection and you whimpered at the feeling. You took the plunge and gently wrapped your fingers around him and started pumping your fist. Felix detached himself from your lips and slumped his forehead against yours as his heavy breathing stuttered.

“Fuck, love. You’re doing so good for us…” He choked out and pecked your cheek as he leaned in to whisper against your ear. “How would you like to feel us inside of you?” You felt the sinful words seep into your skin and mingle with every nerve ending in your body. The shiver of your body was beyond involuntary and a shuttered breath escaped your lips.

He sat up to look you in the eyes directly, taking the hand that you had wrapped around his dick, and started moving it for you when it unintentionally froze from the proposition. “I-I… Y-you…” Felix cut off your rambling with another chaste kiss to your lips.

“If you would rather stop here, we can…” He sounded a bit sullen with each word, and it warmed your heart that he wanted to make sure you were still comfortable.

Just as he started to pull away, you wrapped your free arm around his neck and pulled him into a bruising kiss, your other hand continuing to jerk him off slowly. “G-god, Felix. This is a fucking dream…” You mumbled against his lips.

You could feel the bright smile of his against your lips and he broke away to inquire again. “Is that a yes?” He said with a hopeful smile.

Your eyes surely had stars in them as you looked up at his glowing features. You meekly nodded and your voice sounded more like a whine when you quietly whimpered a short, “Please…”

With that said, he jovially leaped off of you and you grumbled your disappointment and sat up to watch the three men hover around a duffle bag. You shouldn’t have been surprised to see the three of them turn back to you with a condom in each of their hands, all of them looking at you as if they were famished and you were their buffet. 

“Um… Felix?”

Said boy tilted his head in query. “What is it, love?”

You could feel the heat rise in your cheeks as you shyly looked down at the sheets clenched between your fingers. “I don’t know if this changes anything for you, but…” You chanced a glance up at his beautiful face that had confusion written all over his features. “I… I have a birth control implant… and I’m clean… so you don’t really need…” You fixed your eyes on the prophylactic in his hand. “...you know…” You were suddenly too shy to say it outright.

Said item was instantly dropped to the floor as he stared at you in shock. The other two looked panicked and stepped up to him, immediately questioning what your words meant. After he numbly translated, the other two men’s faces comically morphed to match their Australian member’s expression.

You panicked. “But I don’t mind either way! I totally understand if you still want to use precautions and all–” Before you could mutter another syllable, he was on you in an instant, silencing you with his lips.

“Fuck, love. There’s no way we deserve you.” He kissed you again and sat up to cup your cheeks and intensely look you in the eyes. “Are you absolutely sure about this?” Relieved, you smiled at the beautiful man.

“Absolutely.” And with that, Hyunjin joined Felix as he, too, pounced on you like a predator.

Minho, who still had all of his clothes on, just continued to watch as the other two caged you in. “How do you want to do this, baby? Who do you want first? Or do you want both?” Hyunjin had a mischievous smile as he slowly removed his pants and boxers as well and gave your body a sinful once-over. Your eyes bulged out of your head at the sight of him.

You suddenly felt incredibly small under their gaze and beautiful naked bodies. “U-um… I don’t mind either way… I just want to be here for all of you. You can have me however you want…” Your words were bold but your voice was meek and their hungry gazes went gentle.

“Such a sweet baby…” Hyunjin said as they hovered over you and slowly kissed their way down from your jaw to your neck on each side. You wanted to touch them so badly. 

With a sudden bout of courage, you tentatively took their cocks in each hand from where they hovered at your sides and put in all of your effort to try and please them. They let out a surprise groan and Hyunjin muttered something to Felix in Korean, immediately scooting over so Felix could position himself between your legs.

Hyunjin stepped back, relinquishing your grasp on his dick and you quivered at the man on top of you that was staring into your soul. Felix had already replaced your hand on his cock and you arched your back when he ran the tip through your folds and over your clit. 

You had achieved a core memory from the feeling of his burning hot touch.

“You sure about this, love?” He searched your eyes once more and you had decided your patience had run out. You grabbed the back of his head and crushed his lips to your own, followed by a breathy whisper against his lips.

“Please, Felix… I want you so bad…” Your whimpered words earned a grin on the boy’s angelic face and you slowly felt him stretch you open as he entered you. 

Your jaw dropped as you groaned against his lips and he kissed you again, minutely stifling the noises that were so very desperate to escape your mouth from the feeling of his slow intrusion. It had been so long since you’d had sex that you forgot how overwhelming the first push was.

Once he was fully sheathed inside you, he pulled back to look at your face only to find a slack jaw and scrunched-up eyes. You felt the presence of Hyunjin on your right, slowly shushing your whimpers as he tried to distract you with wet kisses along your jaw and neck. “Shhh, you’re doing great, baby girl. Taking our Yongbokkie so well.” He briefly turned to Felix. “How does she feel, Lixie-ah?”

Felix groaned and dropped his forehead to meet yours and you finally pried your eyes back open so you could take in the proximity of his angelic face. “She feels amazing Jinnie…” Felix moaned loudly when you clenched around him and he used the hand that he wasn’t using to hold himself above you to reach down and lift your left leg higher, letting himself push deeper. “I’m not sure how long I’ll last.”

You watched as Felix lifted his head to watch Hyunjin reach down and play with your clit, and they both locked eyes with you when you whined at the sensitivity. Hyunjin smirked playfully and looked back at Felix. The freckled man’s face, which was once holding burning embers, was now looking up at Hyunjin with heart eyes as he towered over the both of you. 

“You gonna get her all wet and ready for me Lix?” Hyunjin asked the younger boy with a smoldering grin, never relenting in the slow torture of his fingers on your clit. Felix nodded frantically and, just like that, he turned back to you with a cocky grin.

“Does it hurt? Can I move, sweet thing?” He lowered his lips back down to your jaw and placed a chaste kiss there while waiting for your answer.

“God, please.” You sighed wistfully.

That was all the incentive he needed to pull all the way back to the tip, and then slam all the way back to your cervix with full force. You cried out in pleasure and he set a brutal pace, Hyunjin’s fingers finally leaving your swollen bundle of nerves to start playing with your nipples and return his lips to your neck. There was no doubt going to be a mess of hickeys all over your body and you trembled at the thought.

With the boys attacking both sides of your neck, you were, again, faced with the man at the end of the bed. He tilted his head and raised his eyebrow at you again to challenge or mock you, you weren’t quite sure which… maybe both. However, with the way he palmed his bulge over his pants, and seeing how the tips of his ears were bright red, he was definitely excited for more.

You were so gone for these men that you wanted to really chalk it up for them. With Felix still pounding into you, you slowly rolled your tongue over your bottom lip before biting down on it and throwing your eyes and head back with the most pornographic moan you could muster.

When you raised your head again, all three men were staring down at you with shock written on their faces. You couldn’t let the embarrassment sink in long, however, because your action brought Felix to his climax.

The sight of Lee Felix’s face during orgasm was like being shot in the heart with a poison that spread heat throughout your every nerve ending. There was no describing it. You could feel the force of his cum shoot deep inside you and you felt dizzy as he rode himself through it.

“Holy hell, love…” He dropped down to kiss you messily. “You’re a goddamned dream…” He leaned back and looked at your sweating and panting form and offered the sweetest of smiles. However, Hyunjin interjected with a slap on Felix’s ass and everyone breathily chuckled at the yelp that escaped his mouth. “Yah!”

“Don’t be a hog, Lixie-ah!” He looked back at you while still talking to Felix. “I’ve been dying to rearrange her insides…” He poked that damned tongue out the side of his mouth and ran his eyes up and down your frame, making you shiver from the intensity.

You winced when Felix’s softening cock was pulled out of you and he retreated from between your legs but gasped when Hyunjin took his place and grabbed both of your ankles. He smiled sinfully at you and propped your legs up on his shoulders as he lined up with you.

Hyunjin was definitely longer than Felix because as he breached your entrance and your breathing picked up again from the delicious feeling of him sliding through your walls, pushing Felix’s seed even deeper inside you, you choked on air when he kept pushing further against your cervix until you felt honest-to-god tears run down your cheeks. He froze just before he was completely flush with you and he looked panicked.

“W-wha– did I– are you o-okay?” He momentarily struggled with his English as he stuttered the words and you quickly wrapped your arms and legs around him when you felt him try to pull out.

“N-no! I’m okay! Gwenchana! Gwenchana!” You put your hand over your mouth at your outburst and giggled at yourself, thankfully making the other men relax as well. “I-I think you might just be too… ahem…” Why were you so shy?

He sweetly smiled and leaned down to kiss you, seemingly understanding your meek words. “Do you want to lead then?”

You really didn’t know what you wanted, but if he kept going at that rate, he might really rearrange your insides. Your shy nod brought an endeared smile to his face and, before you could even prepare yourself, he quickly pulled out and tumbled backward to lay on his back, pulling you on top of him to face the foot of the bed. You gasped and briefly saw Felix and Minho mumbling something off to the side with Minho responding with a cute giggle.

You looked down at Hyunjin who was devouring you with his eyes and running his hands up and down your hips and thighs. “I like seeing you on top of me, baby.” You bit your lip and sprung into action, lifting your hips and grabbing his cock to line him up. Your eyes were glued to his gorgeous face when you slowly lowered yourself down on him and saw his long lashes flutter in euphoria.

There was no getting over how unreal this was. You felt dizzy as every inch of him dragged across your sensitive walls and you slightly jerked your hips up when his tip pushed against your bruised cervix. His face screwed shut as he seemed to try and hold back from fucking up into you.

Honestly, some twisted part of you wanted him to.

When you wiggled your hips back down, you took deep breaths and ground against him until the pleasure started to weigh out the pain. When his hips accidentally twitched up into you, you let out a strangled cry and Hyunjin reached up to cup your face in his hands.

“I’m sorry baby. You just feel so good…”

You naturally leaned down until your lips collided again and all you could respond with was a small ‘more’ mumbled against his lips. His eyes flew open and you planted your hands on each of his pecs, silently pleading with your eyes as you continued to grind against him.

That was when his eyes turned dark and his fingers dug into your hips and ass with bruising force. The powerful thrust that followed had you seeing stars.

He had planted his feet onto the bed and started fucking up into you at a brutal pace, muttering both English and Korean expletives under his breath as his hands moved their grasp to fondle your bouncing breasts. That was when you felt Felix’s presence return and start kissing down your neck to meet one of the nipples that Hyunjin’s fingers were teasing.

You whined loudly and threw your head back when Hyunjin harshly pinched the nipple to allow Felix’s tongue to suck and flick the sensitive bud. You returned your hooded eyes to the men when you felt your breasts being released. The following sight made you want to scream.

Hyunjin had grabbed Felix’s jaw and they stared directly into each other’s eyes when Hyunjin forced two of his fingers into Felix’s mouth. The younger man fluttered his eyes and moaned around the digits, sucking and licking around them enthusiastically.

When Hyunjin finally pulled his fingers away, he and Felix continued to stare at each other for a moment, seemingly frozen in time. You whined when Hyunjin slowed down his hips, and that seemed to knock them out of their trance.

Hyunjin regained his cocky demeanor and lowered his spit-slick fingers down to your clit. One particular thrust sprung tears to your eyes, and you cried out when his fingers started circling around your bliss button. You were far too close to climax and both of the men knew it.

After some strangled mumbling from Hyunjin’s mouth, words completely foreign to you, Felix swiftly stood up on the bed and stood his legs on each side of Hyunjin’s torso. His newly awakened erection stood proud in front of your face and you wasted no time wrapping your lips around it and humming at the taste of your own lingering juices on his skin.

The beautiful man sighed in pleasure and tangled his fingers in your hair, his practiced muscles keeping him balanced as Hyunjin continued to pound into you. You worked your mouth and tongue with gusto and once you wrapped your hands around his length as well, you knew you could get him to cum in no time.

“F-fuck… how are you so fucking *ngh* good at this?” Felix muttered in the deepest voice you’ve ever heard and it made you tighten your pussy around Hyunjin’s cock, earning a beautiful moan from his plump lips. “S-shit, love– I’m cummin’...” Felix tried to pull away, but you just wrapped your arms around him to grab his perky ass and pull him further into the tight ring of your esophagus.

You looked up as you felt the first spurts of cum hit your throat, and you were once again blessed with the beautiful sight of Lee Felix’s face of ecstasy. He heaved for a moment once he was done riding out his high and pulled out of your abused mouth. He looked like he was in a trance when he looked down at you and cupped your jaw. However, when you took a big gulp of the cum swimming around in your mouth, his whole demeanor changed.

Felix lowered himself back down to you as he sat to the side of Hyunjin again, a dangerous smile forming on his angelic face as he closed in on your ear, lightly grazing his teeth over the shell of it. “Tell us what you want, love. I know there is something going on in that pretty head of yours…”

He continued kissing and sucking his way down your neck as he waited for a response. There was no way in hell you would be able to voice what you had been fantasizing about.

However, the longer that you were silent, the more aggressive Felix became. 

Almost as if it was planned, Felix harshly bit your shoulder as Hyunjin grabbed your hips and slammed you down on his cock. The few tears that you were holding back sprang from your eyes now and Hyunjin growled at you. “Felix asked you a question, baby girl. I think you’d better answer it.”

You looked up to Minho with pleading eyes, and all he did was raise an eyebrow at you condescendingly. You whimpered in defeat and lowered your head, not being able to look at any of them in the eyes as the words left your mouth.

“Lixie…?” Said man leaned back to await your response. “C-can you…” Gosh, you were so embarrassed, how would you be able to get the words out?

Your body naturally ground down on Hyunjin due to loss of stimulation, and he landed a powerful slap on your ass because of it, immediately returning his hands to their vice grip on your hips to keep them still.

You whined pathetically and looked between the two boys whose hands were currently rubbing and groping your body simultaneously. You returned your vision to your own hands which were fidgeting against Hyunjin’s chest and took a deep breath.

“Can you… like… kiss Hyunjin’s neck or something?”

You started getting anxious when you didn’t hear a response and you looked up to gauge their reactions. You saw their shocked faces for half a second until Felix grabbed your face and kissed your lips passionately.

“God, you’re a fucking dream.” Felix whispered against your lips and then he immediately turned around to bury his face in the other man’s neck.

Hyunjin immediately groaned while exposing his neck for further access for the Australian boy, and you whimpered a quiet ‘yesss’ when Hyunjin slammed you down on his cock as far as you could go, repeating the action with dizzying force.

Felix did everything you could’ve hoped for and more. He devoured the other man’s slim neck, while running his hands up and down the length of his torso, ending the journey of his fingers on one of the older man’s nipples. 

Hyunjin grunted and built up his pace again, meeting you halfway as you bounced up and down on his throbbing cock. The three of you had a thick sheen of sweat on you and your eyes were glued to the two beautiful men under you.

You just about started to protest when Felix pulled his head away from the patch of skin he was attacking, but what he did next made all the words instantly die on your tongue.

He grabbed Hyunjin’s face with both hands and immediately locked their lips together, tongues soon intertwining in a practiced dance. Your eyes were glued to them so intently, that you didn’t even notice Minho climbing on the bed to press up against your back.

You gasped when you felt him against you with his rock-hard cock pressing between your ass cheeks through his pants. The ghosting of his breath against your neck leading up to your ear made you shiver. “What a dirty girl you are.” You felt him smile against your jaw and instead of kissing the patch of skin as you had anticipated, you felt his hands wrap around you and pinch your nipples hard. 

That is what sent you over the edge and your climax came crashing down like waves rolling over you. The two men separated when they heard you scream out in pleasure from your lingering high so they could watch as you worked through your orgasm. You could feel Hyunjin’s legs shake beneath you as he pistoned up into you violently and you knew he was close as well. 

Hyunjin growled something you couldn’t translate and his hips stuttered with shallow thrusts as he emptied inside you. The wet lips of the eldest that ran up and down your neck and shoulder kept prolonging your orgasm and you twisted your head around so you could curl your fingers in his hair and pull him in for a sloppy kiss. You could hear a low growl in the back of his throat and it kept you clenching around Hyunjin’s spent dick.

Hyunjin’s whole body went limp after a few more thrusts and you detached your lips from Minho to pull yourself off of Hyunjin’s twitching dick to collapse between him and Felix. The men smiled at you fondly as they gently ran their fingers up and down the smooth skin of your abdomen and a wave of exhaustion crashed over you. Your eyes were closed and you were panting heavily, trying to get ahold of your bearings.

You took a moment to collect yourself behind your closed lids, however, your eyes flew open when you felt a gentle hand nudge your arm.

What the fuck?

You found yourself tucked snugly underneath the fluffy comforter of the huge bed with only a single light on in the corner of the otherwise dark room. You shifted slightly and realized you were still naked, but you could tell they had cleaned you up before tucking you in. Your eyes followed up to the owner of the gentle hand on your shoulder to be met with a shy-looking Lee Know offering you a bottle of much-needed water. You looked around the rest of the room and found that Felix and Hyunjin were nowhere to be found.

How the fuck did I fall asleep so fast?

You shimmied your way up into a sitting position against the headboard, nodding your head with a small “thank you” in Korean as you gratefully accepted his offering. You guzzled down the water as if you had never tasted anything so delectable in your entire life. Once you finished, he took the empty container from you. “More?” He asked with an adorable head tilt.

You internally swooned and you were sure you looked as dazed as you felt as you looked at the ethereal man. “Please…” You mumbled, eyes completely lost within his own.

He smirked (because of course he knew the effect he had on you) and stood to go retrieve another bottle from the mini-fridge.

Once you had repeated your assault on the second bottle and rejected his offer for another, he sat down next to you on the bed and hesitantly took your hand in his. “How are you feeling?” He shyly asked as he played with your fingers.

As if you weren’t already gone enough for the man, this small considerate question had you even more hopeless than before.

You knew he knew basic English, so you decided to reply simply. “Good, thank you…” You couldn’t stop the bashful smile that bloomed on your face and the crooked smile he gave in return was too much for your eyes (and heart) to handle.

“Hyunjin-ah and Yongbokkie went to bed… um…” He looked up in thought as if he was trying to think of how to say what he wanted in English. “They said they will, um, see you… in morning-time?” He stated the words like a question as if he wasn’t sure if he was conveying the words correctly, you just nodded in understanding. “Are you okay to stay with me tonight?”

You felt electricity shoot up your spine. Who in their right mind would ever deny that kind of invitation? You probably seemed a bit too over-eager as you nodded your head profusely with an immediate “yes!”

He let out the cutest of giggles and hesitantly brought his hand up to brush some of your (surely sex-crazed) hair out of your face. He let his hand linger there as his eyes flickered between both of your own. He muttered a small “cute” in Korean (an easy enough word to translate) and moved to cup your rosy cheek.

“Minho?” He looked startled as you suddenly addressed him by name. You at least knew enough Korean to mutter a small question. “Will you kiss me?” He was definitely caught off guard by your question. His face flushed momentarily, but then he quickly crashed his lips into yours, moving his hands to pull you in by the back of your neck.

You sighed into the kiss and he hummed in response. His tongue tentatively snaked into your mouth and you couldn’t help but think of the duality from his earlier demeanor to the gentle and careful man you were swapping spit with now.

However, that thought was short-lived as his kisses got more and more hungry, his hands gravitating down your back and hips to firmly grope your ass. There was no way you could control the small moan that escaped your mouth as you felt him spread your bare ass cheeks just to release them so they would bounce back to their original place where you were sitting.

You felt the edges of his lips tilt upwards and your body naturally gravitated up on your knees so you could get even closer to him. He then took it upon himself to lift your bare body up by your ass to straddle his seated form. 

Your whole body was sore and you were pretty sure you were cramping from your abused cervix, but you had absolutely zero complaints as you pressed up against the man you had longed for for the longest time. Never did you imagine that you would ever be blessed enough to meet this man, let alone to be in this position on top of him.

You pulled away from the kiss so you could, once again, take in the sight of the god-like-looking man beneath you. His two blown-out orbs stared back at you and you ran your fingers through his silky locks. Your breath hitched in your throat before your raspy voice spoke the words. “I want you, Minho…”

He could barely contain his smile when he quirked his brow. “Oh yeah? Then who do you belong to?” Your eyes widened at his confident English and you bit your lip, eyes drifting up and down his gorgeous body.

“Y-you…” You could feel your rosy cheeks burn furiously.

The hands he was groping your ass with pulled you suffocatingly closer. “Anyone else?” You saw the possessiveness in his eyes and you couldn’t help but feel a bit prideful from it.

“Only you, Minho. Always you…” Before you could even take your next breath, the man had flipped you over to lay your back against the silky sheets once again, his predatory face inches from your own.

You expected him to be harsh and rough you up a bit, but he surprised you. He looked into your eyes with wonder written on his features. “You’re so beautiful, noona…” He said as he stared you down. You felt a shutter wrack your body, but your mind was lost in his eyes.

You could only respond with a wistful sigh and he eventually lowered his head to bury in the crook of your neck. The wet heat of his lips against your pulse made you melt into the sheets and you moaned when he fixed himself between your legs, pressing his clothed erection against your wet clit.

His hands gently grabbed your arms and slowly raised them above your head, his fingers gliding up your skin to eventually grasp your hands as he ground against you. His lips trailed down your chest to your breast so he could suck one of your abused nipples into his mouth.

When you mewled, he propped himself up on his knees so he could rid himself of his shirt and your eyes widened as your hands moved unbidden to glide over the toned skin of his abdomen. He studied your face as your fingers explored his chest, gliding all the way down to the waistband of his sweatpants. You licked your lips at the delectable sight of his raging boner and your fingers played with the edge of the fabric, your gaze drifting back up to meet his smoldering eyes. 

He took it upon himself to stand and remove both his pants and boxers and holy shit… how was his dick drop-dead gorgeous too?! The man eagerly returned to his spot between your legs only, this time, it was his face hovering over your cunt. He gently raised his hands to lightly flick your nipples, making you squeak and then moved his feather-light touch down your body to finally gain purchase on the back of your knees.

Your breathing started to pick up when he hoisted your thighs over his shoulders so you could feel his hot breath fan over your sensitive labia. His eyes, which had been fixated on yours the entire time, finally drifted down to stare at your glistening folds and he closed his eyes in bliss when he finally sucked them into his mouth and moved his tongue through them to find your throbbing clit.

You wanted to cry it felt so good. You didn’t know if he was just a god at eating pussy or if it was just the fact that it was him doing it that brought you to the edge so quickly, but the sensation overwhelmed you too much to think about it. You cried his name over and over again and when he finally snaked his tongue inside you, you grabbed his hair and wailed.

“Oh my god, Minho! Yes! Fuck– holy sh– ngh! Yesyesyes right there! Fff–” You looked down at the gorgeous face in between your legs and you could see a smile in his eyes as you came all over his face. “Ah– Ahhhhh!” You had never had an orgasm so intense and you wanted to reward him for it.

When you finally came down from your high, you pulled him off of you and moved him to stand. He looked confused as you maneuvered him, but quickly changed his demeanor when you took his cock in your hand and swallowed him in one go, making him choke on his own breath. “H-holy fuck–” He gasped.

He was too big to deep throat, but you used all the tricks in the book to give him the best head he has ever had and by the way he was responding, you assumed you were succeeding. He was groaning and kept switching from throwing his head back in ecstasy and looking down at you with fire in his eyes. His jaw was clenched and he was definitely holding back from just full-on fucking your face.

Part of you wanted him to. You wanted him to absolutely wreck your throat until you couldn’t speak anymore, but your aching pussy overpowered that desire. You needed him buried inside you right fucking now.

He puffed out a huge breath that he had apparently been holding when you pulled off of him with a *pop* and crawled backward to spread your legs invitingly. He wasted no time in pouncing on top of you to assault your lips and you whimpered against his mouth when you felt him tease the tip of his penis between your folds.

You whined against his lips. “M-Minho… p-please I need you so badly… please…” He smiled devilishly.

“Fuck, jagiya. You’re perfect…” He used the hand that wasn’t being used to hold himself above you and grabbed you by the jaw to look straight into his hooded eyes. Your pupils were surely blown out and your eyes were gaping as he slowly pushed his way inside you. The stretch was somewhat painful with how thick he was, but the pleasure weighed out the pain once he reached your beaten-up cervix.

“F-fuck, Min…” Your hands scrambled to hold onto something to keep you grounded and one ended up digging into his back and the other grabbed onto his hair, making him groan.

“Gwenchana?” His eyes had squeezed shut in euphoria and you’re sure he didn’t even realize he had switched back to Korean.

You whispered back against his lips, unable to speak any louder. “Gwenchana…” You reassured.

He opened his eyes and for the first time that night, you saw him smile at you with the fondest grin you had ever seen from the man. The drag against your walls was delicious as he pulled back and the both of you cried out into each other’s mouths when he thrust back into you.

A single tear fell from your eye from the overwhelming pleasure and he sweetly ran his thumb over it to wipe it away. He gave you one last gentle kiss before he pulled back out to the tip again and then slammed into you full force. You threw your head back as you cried out and his lips latched onto your neck as he changed his pace to pummel into you at a dizzying rate.

Your body bounced back and forth against the soft sheets and his name fell from your mouth in a non-stop mantra. He, once again, took one of your legs and folded it to throw over his shoulder so he could bury himself even deeper into your cunt, if that was even possible.

Everything about him was perfect and you couldn’t stop the tears that ran down the sides of your face from the amount of pure euphoria you felt in that moment. His lips covered every inch of your clavicle in dark marks and you surprisingly found his possessiveness as a turn-on.

You whimpered, moaned, and cried out your ecstasy and he bored his eyes into your own all the while. “Fuck, noona… you feel so good… so tight and wet for me…” He leaned down to groan against your lips. 

You whined in response, once again surprised by his confident English. “For you, Lino. All for you…” That statement made something inside him snap and he growled right before he pistoned into you full force and dropped his forehead to rest on your shoulder, moving a strong hand to furiously rub your clit all the while.

You basically screamed out his name as your orgasm reached its full peak and your walls squeezed him impossibly tight. His teeth clamped down onto your shoulder to muffle his cry of pleasure and he came so hard you could almost taste it.

He pumped both of you through your orgasms as his mouth moved to mesh with your own, sucking, biting, and licking each other's lips lazily. Once he slowly halted to a stop and relinquished his assault on your mouth, he stood up and languidly walked to the bathroom. You heard running water and then saw the naked Adonis return with a suppressed smile.

He held out a hand and, without question or hesitation, you took it. You yelped when you were suddenly lifted into his arms and carried to the source of the running water, soon after, being lowered into a luxurious bathtub with the scent of essential oils washing over your senses. He quickly climbed in behind you and the feeling of yourself laid back against the naked body of Lee Minho in the blissful heat of a five-star bathtub soothing your aching muscles was almost orgasmic.

“How do you feel?” Minho wrapped his arms around you and whispered against your ear right before he started peppering kisses along your neck.

You turned your head to capture his lips with your own. “I feel like I’m in heaven.” You responded with a smile against his lips. He returned your smile and slightly pulled back to look into your eyes.

“I’m excited for you to meet the other members tomorrow.” His eyes shined brightly, proud of his confident English, but you could still detect the danger in them. “But remember…” He squeezed you with the arms he had wrapped around your midriff. “You’re mine.”

You giggled and pressed another kiss to his lips. “Hmmm…” A sly remark passed through your head. “I think I might need some more convincing.” You said teasingly.

“Oh really?” You saw an evil glint gloss over his eyes and you jumped when you felt the man pinch your clit. “Want more?” You could already feel him sporting a semi against your ass and you were amazed by his stamina.

You quickly turned around to straddle the man and he held you by your hips as you wrapped your arms around him. “Absolutely.”

__________________________________________

If you've made it this far, thank you so much for reading! Sorry if you weren't expecting it, but, in the end, Lee Know always ends up being a top priority for me. 😆

Please like, follow, and share! Thanks baby stays! 😘

2chopsticks2eyes - Masterlist

💙My Favorite Fics🩵

I do not own any of these fics, I just enjoyed reading them! Most of these fics are smutty, so please, no minors!

Stray Kids

Who Dun It? by @bandgie (multi-member, series)

He Just Loves to Share by @seo--changbin (multi-member)

Ass or Tits? by @kaciidubs (multi-member)

Take Care by @multifandomfantasies (Chan & Hyunjin, series)

All Bark, No Bite by @doitforbangchan (multi-member)

Wait Your Turn by @kaciidubs (multi-member)

Pudding by @thefantasyden (Chan and Changbin)

Dance For Us by @2chopsticks2eyes (Danceracha)

Chan

February Filth Fest - Day 27 by @multiwreckedmess

Curious Cat by @kaciidubs

Slipping Out by @smuttystraykidsthoughts

Among Strangers by @3rachasdomesticbanana

People Pleaser by @lovesick-wonderland

Stack by @seospicybin

Big Bad Wolf by @byuntrash101

Lee Know

Repeat After Me by @jl-micasea-fics

Pent-up Emotions by @fluffylino

Changbin

The Drag Down by @byullielle

Hyunjin

Yandere Hyunjin by @mymoodwriting

Han

Can't Help Myself by @thefantasyden

Sucking Off Dom Jisung by @moonjxsung

Felix

Yandere Vampire Felix by @mymoodwriting

Seungmin

Special Request by @red-airhead

One More by @3rachaslut

I.N

Future AU! by @minminbunny

Stop Hitting Yourself by @bugeater101

Ateez

Jenna and Jealousy by @hongjoongtime117 (multi-member)

Whichever Way by @igbylicious (woosan, series)

Best Girl by @beenbaanbuun (yunho & mingi)

The Paradigm Complex by @shadowynn (multi-member)

Dewdrops at Dawn by @sunmoonjune (multi-member)

Make a Wish by @holybibly (multi-member)

Into the Aurora by @honeyhotteoks (multi-member)

Hongjoong

Coming soon...

Seonghwa

Mr. Popular by @wooyoungiewritings

All Tied Up by @pyramid-of-starrs

Make Me Water by @bangtanintotheroom

Yandere Seonghwa by @mymoodwriting

The Thing About Pretty Boys by @wonusite

Hybrid, Yandere Seonghwa by @mymoodwriting

Best Friend's Mother by @hwashotcheeto (series)

Before Midnight by @baekmond

Yunho

Coming soon...

Yeosang

Touch Me, Taste Me, Fill Me Up by @littlefireball

San

I See Red by @0097linersbb

Mingi

Coming soon...

Wooyoung

Die for me by @jisungchan

How to Tame a Brat Tamer by @k-hotchoisan

Jongho

Coming soon...

L

Ass or Tits?

❣ Summary: The question of 'ass or tits' never truly mattered when you had a group of men who loved all of you. ❣  ❣ Word Count: 6.4k ❣ Warnings: Poly! OT8 x Reader, smut, humor, fluff, light Dom/Sub dynamics, creampie(s), squirting, cum play, referenced after care ❣  ❣ Female! Reader [No use of Y/N] | You/Your pronouns ❣  ❣ Additional Tags: Usual first name + pet name references for the members, Reader is referred to as Baby, Mommy, Miss, Princess, Good Girl, Bunny, Bub, Kitten, Jagi, Noona, lightly edited ❣ Stray Kids Masterlist ❣ General Masterlist

“Hey, Hyune?”

The artist hummed as he sketched away at his desk, “Yeah?”

“What do you like better, ass or tits?”

He froze, dropping the charcoal pencil as your words ran through his head on repeat.

“Your ass or tits?”

There was no way he was about to get caught in an infamous partner discourse, not after years of being immune to other futile debates brought on by a certain freckle-faced fairy.

You scoffed out a laugh, rolling onto your stomach from your resting place on his bed, “I mean, I’d hope you’d be talking about my ass or tits, Hyunjin.”

Hyunjin whipped his head toward you, eyebrows pushing to his hairline, “W-Well how am I supposed to know!?  This is one of the questions every person dreads! You’re expecting me to pick one or the other on one of my favorite people in the world? What then? Are you going to ask me ‘acrylic or charcoal’? Because I’ll have you know, those are two very different mediums and-”

“Hyunjin, baby - it’s just a question!” Stifling a chuckle, you shook your head, “It’s not like I’m going to ban you from sex if you pick something I didn’t expect - I’m just curious, you know? All of you have different preferences and even though after two years I can kind of make a good guess, I wanna hear it from the sources.”

His shoulders relaxed, visibly slumping in his chair and running his cleaner hand through his short hair, “You’re stressing me out, muse! Why didn’t you lead with that?!”

You rolled your eyes, “I’m so sorry, my little drama queen - now, pick!”

Dark eyes scanned your figure, his head cocking to the side and if you looked closer you could’ve seen the gears turning in his brain.

“Mm… Tits.”

“I knew it.”

“Wha- What’s that supposed to mean?! Are you calling me basic?”

“No, my prince, I’m calling you predictable,” getting off of the bed, you walked toward him and pinched his cheek lovingly, “you grope Changbin’s chest like it’s your job, and there’s rarely a moment your hand isn’t on my chest when we’re cuddling. Now, go wash up - we’re meeting in Chris’s room.”

With a quick kiss to the crown of his head, you walked out of his room with your phone in hand, thumbs typing away in your group chat.

|❣️: Chris’s room asap 💋

“So… Is there a reason why we were summoned? To Chan’s room, no less?” Minho hummed inquisitively, picking up a small souvenir from the eldest’s dresser and turning it in his hands.

“If this is an intervention about League, I swear I didn’t mean to yell that night - I honestly didn’t think anyone heard me!” Came Felix’s whine of defense, already making himself a home on the California king bed, “Seungmin was throwing the game on purpose and I was losing against this stupid-”

“That’s crazy.” Seungmin gaped, faux shock on his face as he purposefully rolled on top of the Aussie, a muffled groan getting caught in the midst of it all. “I told you not to put too much trust in me!”

“Lixie, hate to break it to you, but this definitely isn’t an intervention, but we’ll come back to that point later.” Clapping your hands, you took in the rest of the members who either piled onto the bed, doubled up in Chris’s computer chair, or stood against the door frame. “Anyways - I called you guys here because I have a question!”

“I’d peel a pineapple for you if you asked.”

The room went silent as all eyes shot to Jisung who was currently seated in Minho’s lap, a triumphant smile on his pretty lips.

“I… No, Jisung, it’s not that question, but I’ll remember your answer when I do ask.” Willing away the confused looks sent your way, you cleared your throat, “The actual question is; which do each of you like better - my ass, or my tits?”

The room broke into an uproar, various voices speaking over one another as some questioned the validity of the question while others argued their respective points.

“Noona, you really think we can just pick one thing to like about you?”

Minho scoffed, “I can - her ass, easily.”

“Oh… Shit, you’re right.”

“Jeongin?! Weren’t you just saying you couldn’t pick?!”

“Hyung, that was before I was reminded of how her ass looks in her pajama shorts - you can’t tell me that’s not the hottest sight.”

“I can because I chose her tits!”

Felix laughed, holding his hand up for an air high-five, “I was gonna pick her tits too, Jinnie!”

“This is the stupidest conversation I’ve ever heard,” Seungmin mumbled, throwing an arm over his face, though it did nothing to cover the redness of his ears.

“Bunny, you know you’re more than just your body parts, right?”

You nodded enthusiastically, “Binnie, I’m well aware - I’m just asking for the fun of it, it’s nothing deeper than that!”

Changbin hummed, fluffy curls shifting with the movement, “In that case, I’m team ass - it’s just so cute and round and-” He lifted his hand, squeezing the air as if it were your ass cheeks with a dreamy sigh, “-god, I love it.”

“Okay but, what if we can’t pick?” Jisung piped up, a soft pout puffing his cheeks, “There’s no way I can just choose one - look at you, you’re fucking sexy, Jagi!”

“The oral fixation says boobs, Han, there’s no way out of it.”Felix deadpanned from his place on the bed, his head turned to nail the man with a mischievous glint, “Trust me, I know.”

The latter’s eyes flicked to your t-shirt, tracing the outline of your breasts in the loose fabric with ease. “Yeah… Yeah, you’re right - her tits are amazing.”

“Alright, Chan and Seungmin, you two are the only ones left - make your choice!” Hyunjin demanded lightly, gesturing his hand toward your body from his seat next to you, “Tits or ass? Ass or tits? Which one is it?”

“I’m not playing this game,” the youngest of the two mumbled, his position unchanged.

“Oh, come on, Seungmin! She said it herself, it’s just for fun, she won’t take any offense to what you choose,” Felix prodded, wiggling his body next to his boyfriend, “and we won’t make fun of you if you pick something we didn’t expect.”

“Yeah, puppy,” reaching down, you threaded your fingers through his black hair, “whatever you pick is fine with me, and if anyone makes fun of you for it, they won’t get anything from me for a week.”

That roused a small chuckle from him as he moved his arm, looking up at you with soft eyes, “Really? You think you could go that long?”

“For my Seungmin? Of course. Now, which is it, baby?”

His lips quivered, struggling between forming words and keeping his solitude until he finally murmured, “I like your thighs.”

“That wasn’t even an-”

You quieted Hyunjin with a glare, “Finish that sentence and that’s the only thing you’ll be finishing near me, Hwang.”

“Aw- I wanna change my answer, her thighs are fucking amazing too!” Jisung all but wailed, practically having a full on meltdown, “When you’re eating her out and she wraps them around your head like earmuffs - they’re so warm but you can’t hear her moans when she does it so it’s just a horrible, beautiful curse!”

“No changing your answer, Sungie, you’re still team tits.” 

Now, all the attention was directed to the only one left; Chris, still leaning against the doorway of his room with an embarrassed flush on his face - nothing preparing him for this conversation that pulled him from the sanctity of his laundry run.

“Well, Chris? What do you like?” You had to bite your lip to keep from laughing, knowing full and well that everyone already knew what their boyfriend would pick.

“Ah- You’re seriously going to make me say it?!”

“Come on, Chan, we all said ours, no matter how obvious,” Changbin sent a side eye in an unbothered Minho’s direction, “some of ours may have been.”

The eldest sighed, dropping his head before bringing it up once again, “I like your ass, baby.”

Scoffing, Felix crawled across Seungmin to get closer to you, “I don’t understand how you guys can pick her ass over these,” his hand quickly found home over one of your breasts, gently squeezing the mound over your shirt and earning a shocked gasp in return, “like, how could you not want to suffocate in them?”

“Especially with how sensitive her nipples are?” Hyunjin chimed in, claiming your other breast with his larger hand, jiggling and watching the ripples from your shirt in response.

“Oh my god- The sound she makes when you suck on them?” The bed dipped with a new weight, Jisung making his way onto the bed, causing Jeongin to crawl over and straddle Seungmin. “You guys are seriously missing out.”

Changbin groaned, “It’s not like we don’t like them, we just love her ass more, there’s a difference, Ji.”

In the meantime, you couldn’t help the small sighs of pleasure escaping you as the duo continued to fondle you over your shirt, Jisung taking the hem into his hands.

“Can we, Jagi?”

You nodded happily, “You can, Sungie.”

Hyunjin and Felix pulled back as he lifted your shirt up and off, tossing it off the edge of the bed without a care in the world - why would he, when your tits were on display for him and the men that admired them?

“Why don’t we all take the chance to really admire our favorite parts about you, my muse?” 

Hyunjin’s sultry voice easily floated through the air, the hidden implications more than enough for the atmosphere to ignite with lust.

“Are you ready, angel?”

You blinked up at Felix with dazzling eyes, a small smile tugging at your lips, “Of course, Lixie.”

In the background, you could hear the familiar sounds of panted breaths and the rustling of clothing, but you wouldn’t dare to turn your head from the scene in front - or, rather, above you. 

Hyunjin took the role of straddling your torso while Felix and Jisung kneeled at the sides of your head without even a hint of the clothing that once covered their bodies.

“Innie, can you pass me the lube?”

Jeongin broke from Seungmin’s lips with a groan, narrowing his eyes, “Why can’t you just spit on it, Hyung? I’m kind of in the middle of something here.”

“Because I asked you to? If I felt like spitting I would’ve done it already,” Hyunjin spoke matter-of-factly, catching the glimpse of Jisung guiding his dick into your mouth from the corner of his eye, “don’t be a smartass!”

“Smarta-”

The youngest was unceremoniously flipped onto his back, the black haired singer reaching into the nightstand and tossing over a bottle of lube with a huff.

“Seriously, it was never that big of a deal, you brat.”

Snatching up the tube, Hyunjin wasted no time in squeezing a generous amount between the valley of your breasts, humming out a small apology when you jumped at the cold gel on your skin.

“Forget what I said,” Jisung moaned softly, watching the way your cheeks puffed and hollowed with each drag of his cock, “your mouth is my favorite part.”

Pulling off of him with a pop, you pumped him with your right hand and tossed him a teasing smirk, “You’re still team tits, Sungie.”

Turning your head, you eagerly welcomed Felix’s dick with an eager tongue lapping at the precum beading the tip before taking him in one fell swoop.

“That doesn’t take away from the fact that your mouth is fucking amazing, sunshine.” Felix groaned, bringing a hand to cup your cheek as he lightly thrust into your leisurely bobs.

“Especially for the fact that we’re here for these.” Hyunjin’s lube covered hands squeezed your breasts around his length, the swells positively shining as they sandwiched his cock in an unparalleled warmth.

It wasn’t long until an unplanned rhythm was found between the four of you; alternating between blowjobs and handjobs for the sunshine twins while a certain artist busied himself with a simple rhythm of humping your chest.

In the meantime, Changbin managed to swap positions with Minho for the chair, sitting the second eldest in his lap and littering slow kisses paired with sharp nips along the length of his neck while he watched the show before them.

“Chan, you’re not going to just stand there the whole time, are you?” Minho mused with a raised eyebrow, noting the way the eldest hadn’t even moved a muscle from his spot near the door.

Chris hesitated for a moment before shaking his head, “No, but I’m doing laundry - I don’t wanna get sidetracked and forget about it in the wash, you know?”

There was a disinterested hum followed by a huff he knew all too well, and he found himself pushing off of the doorway with a breathless laugh.

“You have such a way with words, you know that?”

Smirking, Minho shrugged, “I know, it’s a talent.”

Standing in front of the two - and inadvertently blocking the once flawless view - Chris planted his hands on the armrests of the chair before leaning down to catch Minho's lips in a slow kiss, just to part a moment later to do the same with Changbin over his shoulder.

“A-Ah- Tighten your hand a little, Jagi.”

“You have hands,” Hyunjin panted, licking his lips as he watched his pink tip repeatedly disappear and reappear, “help her out- fuck, Lix…”

The blond hummed against his neck, licking at a blossoming hickey, “‘M sorry, just feels so good.”

“Hyune, move your hand a bit.”

Abiding the request, Hyunjin slid his hand to the outer swell of your breast while Jisung licked his fingers before easily finding their way to your nipple, gently rolling the nub between his finger and thumb.

The moan you let out was instantly muffled by Felix’s cock, which in turn made him grit out a shivering groan, “F-Fuck, I’m gonna come soon.”

“M-Me too,” Jisung nodded frantically, eyes trained on the way his hand enveloped yours as he fucked your fist, “gonna paint those pretty tits of yours, Jagi.”

It only took a handful of strokes before Felix was drawing from your mouth with frantic breaths, Jisung slipping from your soiled hand to take over the rest of the job as they both aimed for your chest.

“God, look at how gorgeous they look wrapped around Jinnie’s dick.”

“They were just made to have a dick between them, huh?”

You groaned helplessly, bringing your hands to cover Hyunjin’s and squish your breasts together more, “C-Come on, show mommy how much you love her tits.”

If there was one thing to get them to fall, it was that title - and, like a harp string being plucked, they both came with a sharp gasp and a guttural groan, cum spraying across your breasts and a few drops even landing on your fingers.

Hyunjin shivered above you, eyebrows drawing together with the silver eyebrow piercing catching the glint of the light.

“I can see you’re close, Hyune,” squeezing his hands lightly, you watched as Jisung and Felix flocked to him, hands wandering his chest while lips danced along his shoulders and neck, “come for Miss, my prince, make a mess of me.”

A choked moan fell past his lips as his hips stuttered before he lifted himself onto his knees and came against your breasts, his cum joining the mess of the other two with ease and creating an intricate pattern of white along your skin.

Jisung dipped down to lick a fat stripe through the cum, collecting as much as he could onto his tongue before pulling Felix in for a beautifully messy kiss above you - then repeated the process with Hyunjin, leaving you in a state of horny awe.

“Seungmin, you’re up next.” Felix called happily, swiping his thumb along your breast before presenting it to your lips and watched as you eagerly licked it clean. “You’re so kinky.”

You stifled a laugh, giving the pad of his thumb a soft kiss, “You’re one to talk.”

The trio moved away to make room for the thigh connoisseur, watching as he untangled himself from Jeongin and shuffled between your legs - your pajama shorts and underwear having already met the same fate as your t-shirt moments ago.

“I… I don’t think I’m gonna last long,” he mumbled quietly, a strawberry blush turning his ears as he nudged the leaking head of his cock against the plush of your inner thigh. “Might’ve pushed it a bit too close with Innie.”

“That’s more than okay, pup,” reaching your hand out, you grabbed the lube before handing it to him, “if it bothers you, you can always have a round two later, okay?”

Seungmin nodded dutifully, taking the lube from you while tapping your legs, prompting you to lift them both and lean them on his chest; pouring a generous amount of lube in the palm of his hand to coat around his length.

With a bit of maneuvering, he had both of your calves resting on his right shoulder with his dick nestled in the tight space between your thighs and just above your pelvis - if you focused hard enough, you could feel the heat of his balls against the lips of your pussy.

“M-Mm, fuck…” Wrapping his right arm around your legs, his left hand went down to grip the outside of your thigh, squeezing the flesh as he jutted his hips forward with a quiet moan.

You watched on as he fucked your thighs in quick, sharp thrusts, brown eyes fogged and unfocused as he began to chase the high that was undoubtedly close.

“Good puppy, my good puppy - love my thighs so much, hm? Maybe one of these days I should get you to hump one, would you like that?”

You could clock the faint twinkle in his eye from a mile away, catching the subtle pout of his lips as his body rocked against yours without rhyme but with the sole reason of finishing.

His blush now crawled across his face, tinting the apples of his cheeks as his eyes found yours, “Really?”

Humming, you flexed your thighs, “Really, pup, I’d love to watch you ride me.”

He whimpered, blunt nails digging into your skin as his head dropped to nip at your ankle, “W-Want that, bub - want it so bad.”

“Then it’s yours, Minnie. I’m all yours.”

The next thrust forward had ropes of white streaking up the length of your stomach, breathless moans hidden behind firmly pressed lips as Seungmin shook against your legs, tensing and shaking with each wave until he finally relaxed with a shaky breath.

“You okay, pup?”

Nodding, he gave you a soft smile, “Yeah, but you better not forget your promise.”

You laughed, accepting a kiss to your ankle as a parting gift as he moved away from you and into the arms of a lounging Hyunjin - the comment of him being “disgustingly sweaty”, and Hyunjin’s response of “Then get off of me!”, not going unnoticed in the process.

Turning your gaze to the ceiling, a knowing smile grew on your lips, “Do I even have to ask who’s going next?”

“Nope!” Sliding into view came your darling bread, a smug grin on his lips as his face hovered over yours, “You don’t even have to guess, I’m already here.”

Bringing your hand to his jaw, you lightly scratched your nails under his chin, “Of course you are, maknae - so, how do you want me? Doggy style? Reverse cowgirl? Some secret third position I have yet to learn?”

Judging from the sparkle of his eyes the instant the second option left your lips, he had his decision already cut out and you laughed at his inability to be discreet.

“Alright, I guess this is to make up for slacking on leg day, isn’t it?”

Jeongin rolled onto his back, watching as you straddled him with ease, “You’d have to ask Changbin Hyung about that, Noona - you were the one who suggested it anywa- ah!”

You didn’t need to waste time in teasing yourself as your hand wrapped around the base of his cock, lining it up with your severely neglected pussy before sinking down in one fell swoop - a satisfied moan leaving your lips.

“O-Oh god, maybe this wasn’t a good idea…”

“Oh? And what makes you say that, baby?”

Of course, you already knew the answer judging from the way his calves tensed, his toes curled and - less externally obvious - the way his dick twitched inside of your warm walls.

“Noona, please-”

“Have a little too much fun with Minnie, huh? Got yourself all excited while you were waiting?” Clicking your tongue, you rolled your hips teasingly, “I bet you were touching yourself while Seungmin was having his turn, weren’t you, baby boy?”

He whined, tossing his head back with a groan, “Just- Just give me a minute, I swear I’ll last!”

Humming, you waited a few seconds before shaking your head, “Sorry, Innie, if you come early then that’s just how it is - just lay back and enjoy the view, okay? This is what you wanted, remember?”

With no other choice, the sounds of your joined moans soon filled the room as you rode him with one goal on your mind.

“Fuck, look at that view…” Neither one of you were aware of Changbin’s sudden presence beside the bed as he leaned beside Jeongin, basking in the sight of your ass jiggling with each bounce. “I’ll never get over it.”

“I-” Jeongin whimpered, short huffs of breaths escaping him, “T-This is the first time-”

“-she’s ridden reverse cowgirl?! IN-ah, what were you waiting for?!”

“It’s not that he was waiting,” you laughed breathlessly, though the clench of your pussy earned a moan in its wake, “he was just too excited to try everything else that normal positions were at the bottom of his list.”

“What a shame, wasting his chance like this.”

Lifting your head, you were now met with the sight of Minho directly in front of you, keen eyes unblinking as he took you in with a smirk.

“Is it a waste, Min?” Slowing your bounces to languid strokes, your head tilted prettily to the side, “I’d like to think of it as an introduction to what future chances would be like.”

This time, his smirk reached his eyes, brown irises sparkling with amusement, “You naughty kitten.” His hand cupped your cheek as he dipped down to steal a kiss, nipping at your bottom lip in the process.

You preened at the sensation, but the moan that followed came from the firm grip on the swell of your ass cheek, the hand and the pressure stemming from two different forms of familiarity.

“See? What did I tell you?” Changbin smirked, squeezing his hand over Jeongin’s to tighten his grip on your ass, “You can watch all you want, but the real fun is in touching.”

The younger groaned out a desperate sound, “‘M g-gonna-”

At the hint of his confession, you forfeited the feeling of Minho’s lips on yours for the opportunity to go back to bouncing on Jeongin’s dick without abandon, fisting the sheets to distract from the unyielding burn in your thighs.

“-a-ah- p-please- N-Noona, oh god, I-” He cut himself off with a choked gasp, hips canting as his orgasm took him by storm.

A hum of satisfaction vibrated past your lips as his warmth filled you, stilling to spare him the overstimulation for the time being. “Feels so good baby, you never disappoint.”

Once the incessant twitching of his cock died down, you lifted yourself off of his lap, shivering at the sensation of his load slowly seeping out of you and dribbling back onto his spent dick.

“So,” you breathed, looking between the two men currently surrounding you and shooting a glance toward Chris, “who’s next?”

The answer to that question was a very smug Minho, excitement thrumming through your veins as he nodded his head toward the edge of the bed - the silent command leading you to find yourself to where you currently were now.

“Minho!”

Your nails clawed at the sheets, the mattress rocking along with your body as the black haired man fucked into you like a man possessed.

“It’s only fair that someone gives you your first orgasm of the night, kitten,” he drawled, thumbs digging into the small of your back as he held you impossibly tighter, “why wouldn’t I make sure that it’s me giving it to you?”

Your body couldn’t decide between attempting to run away from his powerful thrusts, or submit yourself to the fiery pleasure that hoped to consume you, until you felt the warmth of his hands sliding up your back, past your shoulder blades, and along your forearms.

Like a slab of clay for him to mold, he maneuvered your arms behind your back and pinned them with one hand, the other going back to its home on your hip as he aimed long, precise thrusts to a spot he was well acquainted with.

The side of your face melted into the mattress, tears of pleasure blurring your vision, as any sound you’d hoped to make dissolved into hiccuped breaths and encouraging mewls.

Minho grunted, clenching his jaw as he felt the telltale signs of your orgasm begin to shine through, “That’s it, kitten, give it to me.”

Your legs trembled, pussy fluttering and clenching with each passing second until your body tensed with a cry of his name falling from your spit-shined lips.

He welcomed the new wave of arousal coating his dick and adding to the already sloppy glide of your cunt, wet slaps sounding through the room as he fucked you through your high with a breathless chuckle.

“There it is.”

Grip tightening on your wrists, his hips met yours a number of times before he pulled out with a gasp, jacking himself off with his free hand and coming along the curve of your ass and thighs - much to your delirious chagrin.

“Why…?” You whined breathlessly, wiggling your hips for further emphasis - not that he needed it.

Minho released your wrists to land a swift smack to your unsoiled ass cheek, a satisfied smile curling his lips from the squeak you let out. “Because I wanted to - you still have two people to fill you the way you wish, kitten, let’s not get too greedy, hm?”

There was a slew of giggles and chuckles from the onlookers, and you tried your best to send them your best glare, though your efforts were in vain as you felt a pair of hands caressing your thighs.

“Get up on the bed for Binnie, bunny.”

You obeyed with no hesitation, already knowing which position you would be set in for the remainder of the session as you turned to tuck a pillow under your chin, bringing your knees up and out to sit your hips high in the air and dip your spine into a fine arch - pretty and presentable.

“God,” Changbin groaned, scrambling to fill in the space behind you as fast as he could, “I’ve been waiting so long to get you like this, bunny, you would not believe.” His firm hands instantly went to cup your ass, spreading your cheeks further and sucking in a breath at your glistening hole. “So fucking pretty…”

“Binnie.”

Your insistent, warning whine hadn’t fallen on deaf ears, and he wasted no time in notching the fat head of his dick to your fluttering walls.

“Alright, bunny, deep breaths for me.”

Of course, you already knew the drill, having grown custom to the mind numbingly delicious stretch only he was capable of giving you, but the reminder never failed to stir the swarm of butterflies in your stomach.

With a deep inhale, your slow exhale was followed by him sinking past your walls, each inch slowly stretching your cunt around his girth.

It wasn’t long until he was fully seated inside of you, and with warm hands kneading the flesh of your ass, he drew his hips back before snapping them forward, punching a moan from the depths of your lungs.

Even if you were still tingling with the aftershocks of your orgasm, you were still begging for more with each whimpered moan and choked gasp as your body seemed to melt deeper into the arch you had set.

“Look at you, can’t get enough of us, can you?” Changbin goaded, though his tone was soft and warm, “It’s okay, we can’t get enough of you either, bunny.” He lifted his hand to slap the swell of your ass, before gripping the flesh, “You and this ass of yours.”

A shiver shot down your spine as his hand slipped, his thumb caressing the inside of your cheek and just barely grazing your asshole - a temptation that had shown its face among a few of the boys before, but was never fully dwelled on by them nor yourself.

“I’m curious, bunny,” he hummed, slowing his fast thrusts for laxed, deeper ruts, “would you ever let one of us use this other pretty hole of yours?” Sliding his hand further, he pressed his thumb against the tight ring just enough to burn the fantasy into a possible reality, “Would you let Binnie fuck this pretty ass?”

You nodded frantically, your hands gripping onto the poor pillow below you, “Y-Yes! Yes! I-It’s all yours, Binnie - want it so bad!”

His signature, triumphant laugh filled the room as he tossed a glance to his boyfriends, “Hear that? I get first dibs.”

“You can’t just ask her questions like that!” Jeongin groaned, a stern pout set on his lips, “She agrees to anything if you fuck her long enough!”

“Yeah, how else do you think Felix managed to stay up late enough for his Apex tournament that one time?”

“How am I always being brought up here?!” The blond scoffed as he lightly shoved Hyunjin, crossing his arms over his lithe chest, “But, I mean, yeah - three orgasms can get you a pretty good deal.”

Jisung hummed inquisitively, before narrowing his eyes, “But did you win?”

“He won,” Minho huffed, a smirk curving the corners of his lips, “and he gave her head the next morning, I could hear her moans from the kitchen.”

Muted thumps of the headboard began to grow in frequency until a low groan interrupted the riveting conversation - Changbin hunching over your body as his muscles tensed, shivering while he filled you with his seed.

“God, fuck,” he hissed, rolling his hips against yours while your walls fluttered around him, clenching from the orgasm that was just moments away. “You’re too good to us, you know that, bunny?”

You huffed out a breathless laugh, stifling a moan as his hands massaged your lower back out of its arch for a moment of respite, “I-I’ve been told once or twice,” turning your head, sultry eyes landed on the final man of the hour, “but you guys are worth it.”

Chris flushed under the heat of your gaze, just barely catching Changbin’s teasing “Don’t break her back, Chan.”, as he climbed onto the bed and took the space previously occupied by the rapper.

“Think you can stay in this position one more time, baby?” He mused softly, caressing the warm skin of your back before gliding his hand down to the curve of your ass.

Without answering him, you spread your knees and tucked yourself into a deeper arch, wiggling your hips to further entice the man behind you.

“Yeah,” Seungmin chuckled, lazily crossing his arms over his chest, “he’s blowing her back out, it’s over.”

As much as you wanted to turn your head to respond, your train of thought flew out the window as you felt the bed dip slightly, before the pressure of Chris’s blunt tip nudged against your cunt, bumping against your clit tauntingly.

“Alright, princess,” he breathed, dragging the tip along your slit, “why don’t you give them a show for daddy, hm?”

This time, your reply came in the form of an elongated moan as he sunk into your heat, the stretch coming with ease after Changbin’s size, yet the length making your toes curl.

“Oh, god-”

There was no opportunity for a pause, not when you were miles beyond prepped and ready; the orgasm Minho previously gave you, paired with the second one Changbin gently guided you toward yet kept from tipping over, leaving you with a bubble that was ready to burst within minutes.

“F-Fuck, daddy,” you keened, pressing your hips into his own in feigned hopes of getting him impossibly deeper, “please, please fuck me.”

Chris ran his tongue over his bottom lip, eyes glued to the way your pussy wrapped around his length, as he nodded, “Hands, baby.”

A shiver of excitement shot down your spine and you complied almost immediately, using the pillow to keep your head propped up as you worked your arms behind your back, the warmth of his hand easily finding your wrists and pinning them.

With you set up to his liking, he slowly pulled out just about halfway before driving his hips forward with force, the added balance of his right foot planted on the bed adding to his power.

He was definitely going to blow your back out.

It didn’t take long for him to find the perfect rhythm, nor did it take long for the room to be filled with your high pitched moans and gasps, and the slap of your ass against his thighs - the ripples slowly, but surely, turning your limbs to jelly.

“Our perfect girl,” he gritted out, the grip on your hip and wrists tightening marginally, “letting us admire you for the beautiful gem you are - take turns with this gorgeous body of yours.”

It wasn’t news that they were constantly in awe of you, with and without your clothes on - you were the brightest star in their night sky, you were the puzzle piece they finally found to complete their lives separately and together - and they never failed to remind you of how loved you were.

“But, you know you’re so much more than that, don’t you, princess?” Chris tilted his head to catch a glimpse of your face, eyes fogged and unfocused, lips parted with endless moans tumbling through, “You’re so much more than just your body to us.”

“C-Chris!” You managed to choke out between a whimper, his loving sentiments paired with the unyielding strokes of his cock to your deepest, sweetest parts turning your brain to mush, though your body responded in the best way it could.

He hissed at the telltale clench of your walls, a shiver running down his spine as he nodded mindlessly, “Already? It’s alright, baby, you can come for me - don’t hold back, yeah? Give it to me - give it all to me.”

Your body reacted faster than your mind could at his command, your orgasm barrelling toward you at a speed that had your hands balling into fists; every muscle in your body tensing and clenching until the thread snapped with one more well angled thrust. Mouth falling open with a silent scream, the only sound you were able to hear was your own heartbeat as your vision went white.

The first thing to return to you was your hearing, the muffled thumps of your heart fading out into loud, heavy pants - though you knew for a fact that breathing wasn’t just you. The next sense to return was touch, the slightly damp sheets underneath you grounding you back to reality as your eyes fluttered open only to land on an unexpected face.

“Sungie?”

“Jagi, if I swap to ‘Team Ass’ can you do that for me, too?” Jisung’s face was ripe with blush, though his eyes were wide and wild with lust that had your abdomen clench almost painfully.

Furrowing your eyebrows, you frowned lightly, “Do what?”

“You squirted, muse,” Hyunjin murmured beside him, awe laced in his tone, “that was so fucking hot.”

Oh.

It wasn’t until you went to move your arms that you realized Chris was still keeping you pinned - and a second later you realized he was still inside of you.

“Channie?”

“I-I’m okay, I-” Relinquishing his hold on you, his hands instantly went to your hips, thumbs tracing nondescript shapes against your skin, “I just… I need a minute, ‘m sorry.”

“No, no, baby, it’s okay, take your time.” Working yourself onto your hands, your lower back eternally grateful for the relief, you took a quick scan of the empty room, “Where’d everyone else go? Did I genuinely pass out?”

“No - honestly, you were only out for like, a minute, but after you, uh, came, we started the aftercare checklist.” Hyunjin’s hand reached out to wipe away a hint of saliva at the corner of your lips, “Hannie and I are on talk-down duty, Felix is running you a bath, Jeongin’s getting you a washcloth, Seungmin is getting you water while Minho’s starting on dinner, and Changbin is getting the laundry Chan was too fucked out to get himself.”

“I’m not fucked out,” the eldest groaned as he lazily turned his head toward the artist, “it was just a really intense orgasm, alright?”

With enough energy worked up, he pulled his hips away from yours as his softening dick slipped from your pussy, a shared hiss of overstimulation escaping you both in the process.

“Holy shit… Intense is a fucking understatement, she’s dripping so much.”

You bristled at Jisung’s words, though you could feel the reality of the situation currently oozing its way down your clit and undoubtedly landing against the stained bed sheet.

“Fuck, it’s like a river… Am I allowed to be jealous right now?”

“Han, please.” Chris groaned, embarrassment evident in his tone, “We get it, I come a lot, but I really don’t know what you have to be jealous about.”

Ducking your head with a barely contained laugh, you shook your head before meeting Jisung’s stare, “Next time, you’ll be the one almost folded in half and stuffed like a Thanksgiving turkey, okay?”

“I got the water, but it’s gonna cost you-” Seungmin stopped in his tracks as he rounded the bed, his eyes locking onto the mess between your legs, “What- You turned her into an overstuffed twinkie!”

“Seungmin!”

✧. ┊Tagged lovelies: @having-an-internal-crisis-rn, @midnightfrog625, @anyhow-everything, @bangchanbabygirlx, @sweetracha, @nightimescapes, @caitlyn98s, @ch4nn13luv, @ihrtlix, @jeonjungkookenthusiast1997, @maximumkillshot, @y-ur--i, @acker-night, @dreamescapeswriting, @specialstay, @s00buwu, @tinyelfperson, @jj-stay, @katsukis1wife, @inlovewithmusician, @keen-li, @armystay89, @main-character0, @vampcharxter, @ddyskz, @prettymiye0n, @bbgnyx, @ivyisnotokay, @bahng-chrizz, @milknhoneyracha, @hann1bee, @palindrome969, @newhope8, @softkissfelix, @luvyev, @luminouskalopsia, @kpopsstuffs, @luvyev, @starquokka, @wolfs-howling, @broken-glowsticks, @j-onedrabbles, @dawninnie, @junglyric, @piercedddriver, @sometimesleeknows, @mahklathekpopqueen

✧. ┊If your username is in bold italics that means tumblr won't let me tag you. If you’d like to be added to the taglist, fill out this form!

Lose My Breath

Pairing: Han Jisung x Reader

Warning: Smut, Mentions of Blood, Death, Gutwrenching Heartbreak, Angst [18+ ONLY. MINORS DO NOT INTERACT]

Word Count: 9k

Commissioned By: @imperfectlyperfectprincess1

Everything Taglist: @wife2straykids @piscesrising01 @baby-stay92 @kisses-too-the-moon @dwaekkiiracha @rylea08 @satosugu4l @iovecb97 @lordmaahes-nsc @sailorkoss @minh0scat @pixie0627 @50-husbands @jinnies-muse @yaorzu-blog @joyofbebbanburg @number1jeonginstan @skzooluvr @jisunglyricist @ambersnowxxx @stay-tiny-things @thegingerthatwaited

@silly250 @tsunderelino @1810cl @anskiiz @ayyonoona

@31maze13

“You're coming! And that's final!” Lisa yells at you, yanking your arm to pull you off the couch.

“I just got broken up with, Lisa.” You pout. “I wanna stay in my sweatpants, eating ice cream while I cry at sad movies.”

“Y/N… babe, you've been doing that for like a month now. I need my best friend back. I need you to get back out there and back on dicks, or whatever the saying is.” She smiles.

You can't help but laugh at her, she's such an idiot sometimes. You roll your eyes, pulling your arm away from her and head to your room. “Where are you going?” She yells worriedly.

“To get ready. Where else?” You yell back, slinking into your closet. So many options but none that you truly wanted to wear. You and Jaehyun had been together for over a year and you truly thought you were going to be with him forever, but he and his big dick apparently had other plans. Lisa was right, it had been over a month and you really did need to get out and stop sulking around the house. It wasn't doing you any good.

“Wear something sexy!” Lisa yells from the living room. You groan as you move over to your section of sexy dresses, deciding to go with a black one that hugged you just right, while also showing off the perfect amount of skin. You weren't planning to hook up with anyone tonight, but free drinks were always welcome. You quickly applied some light makeup before grabbing your shoes, leaving your hair alone to do its thing.

“Wow!” Lisa exclaims. “You look even hotter than usual.” She grins.

“Yeah, yeah. Let's go.” You chuckle, pulling her out of the house. Once the two of you arrived at the club, you were already ready to go home. You looked around the dance floor and it was filled with people. The place was absolutely packed. You and Lisa weave through the crowd, heading straight for the bar. Lisa orders a bunch of shots for the two of you, sliding four in front of you. She picks up one shot, grinning at you. “Bottoms up!” She yells. You clink your glasses together, downing the shot quickly. The liquor burns the back of your throat on the way down, but it's so good. You can already feel your buzz starting to kick in after your third shot, and then your fourth, you were ready to dance. You pull Lisa to the dance floor, the two of you dancing together, swaying your hips to the beat. You can feel the bass thumping through the floor as you let the alcohol take over your body. It was such a freeing feeling for you.

Lisa smiles at you as you feel a pair of hands slide onto your hips. “Mind if I dance with you?” Someone whispers in your ear. You turn your head, seeing one of the most handsomest men you have ever seen in your life. His dark brown hair, his brown eyes, his dazzling smile. You were hooked on him immediately and you didn't even know his name.

“I'd love that.” You say back, he moves his body closer to yours, pressing his crotch against your ass. He wraps his arms around you, the both of you moving perfectly to the music, it was like your bodies connected like a puzzle. You turn around, wrapping your arms around his neck, he smiles at you, leaning in close to you, his lips brushing against your ear.

“Do you know who I am?” He whispers, pulling back so you can see his face again.

“Should I?” You ask, with a slight laugh.

“Nope.” He grins. “Wanna get a drink?”

You nod your head and he grabs your hand, pulling you through the crowd of people. You look back seeing Lisa dancing with another guy, cheering you on. You felt so giddy as he sat beside you at the bar, his hand resting on your exposed thigh. He was so handsome, you were sure he had to be a movie star or something.

‘What would you like to drink?” He asks.

“Two shots of tequila, please!” You smile. He looks at the bartender, holding up four fingers. “Four shots of tequila.” He yells. The bartender nods his head, beginning to pour your shots.

“What's your name?” He asks you, his hand still resting on your thigh.

“Y/N.” You smile. “What's your name?” You ask.

“You really don't know?” He laughs. You shake your head. “I really don't.”

“Han Jisung.” He says, looking at you with one eyebrow raised, like he's waiting for something to click.

“It's nice to meet you, Han Jisung.” You giggle, leaning in a little closer.

“You can call me Han. Or Jisung. Whatever.” He says, also leaning in a little closer. Your eyes are locked to each other.

“Okay, Han.” You partially whisper, your eyes locked with his.

“Okay, Y/N.” He replies. The bartender sets the shots directly in front of you, but you just can't seem to tear your eyes away from his. You wanted him so fucking badly.

“You guys gonna take these shots?” The bartender asks.

You both come out of your almost spell, smiling at each other, you both grab a glass, clinking them together before taking your shot, and same with the last one. You set down your glass, Han stares at you.

“You wanna get out of here?” He asks. Excitement fires up in your stomach as you eagerly nod your head. Han holds his hand out for yours. You grab onto it, searching for Lisa. You find her dancing but watching you. You mouth to her your leaving, she sends you two thumbs up before Han whisks you away and out of the club. He pulls you onto the sidewalk, it's dark, barely anyone else is out there. He pulls you in closely, his hand caressing your cheek as he leans in. He gently presses his lips to yours, making the kiss slow, passionate and meaningful. But you want more. You slip your tongue into his mouth, he welcomes the harshness of your lips against his. His hand moves to the back of your head, yanking a clump of hair, making you moan into his mouth.

You're so fucking horny, you needed him now. Han pulls away from you, catching his breath. “My hotel is 3 blocks away.” He points in the direction.

“Let's go.” You smile. Hand in hand the two of you quickly make your way to his hotel. You just knew this was going to be a night you were going to remember. The two of you scurry into the lobby of the hotel, sneaking past the front desk heading towards the elevator. Han presses the button and you both stand there in silence waiting for it to come down. Your body is jittery and needy as you wait, you just wanted him to rip your dress right off of you and do whatever he wanted. You let out a sigh of relief as the elevator doors open up, Han pulls you inside quickly pressing the 15th floor, urging the doors to close. When they do, he turns and smiles at you. It feels like the elevator is spinning but before you know it, you're being pulled towards his room. He puts his key against the lock, automatically unlocking the door. He pulls you inside, locking the deadbolt and top lock.

“You think someone is gonna break in?” You giggle as he turns back around to you.

“I just don't want to be interrupted.” He smiles, walking up to you. You back up, falling back onto the bed. You move yourself up further onto the bed.

“Are you on birth control?” He asks. You nod your head. “IUD.” You whisper.

“Good.” He smiles.

Han crawls on the bed, lifting up your dress. You help him, taking it off, tossing it to the floor. He slowly pulls your panties from your body, dropping them wherever. You help him out by discarding your bra, exposing your breasts. Han spreads your legs, memorizing every curve and crevice of your body. He licks his lips and smiles as he moves towards your open legs, your pussy already dripping wet. He lowers his head slowly, spreading your lips open with his fingers before licking a slow strip up your clit. He moves his tongue slightly, letting the tip give your clit a few small kitten licks. Your fingers slide into his hair, gripping it as you let out a loud moan.

“Fuck" you cry. It’s been too long since you’ve had a tongue down there.

He begins to move faster, your hips circling with his tongue, your body urging you to get off. You can't help but to grind yourself into his face.

“Shit that feels so fucking good" you cry. Han picks up his pace, moving his tongue in every direction, your orgasm building fast.

“Please don’t stop. Just like that” you scream. "Don't stop. Oh god."

Your breath hitches as his hands grip your thighs, fingers digging in as he steadies himself in-between your legs.

“I’m.. I’m gonna cum" you cry, your hands moving from his hair to the bed sheets, gripping them so tightly your knuckles turning white. You move your hips faster, needing your orgasm to take you over now. A few more licks from Han's delightful tongue and your orgasm rushed through your entire body. Han moves from between your legs, but you don’t move. You can't. You lay there attempting to catch your breath as your chest heaves up and down, no words or thoughts forming.

You barely manage to open your eyes enough to make eye contact with Han. He smiles at the sight of you. You watch him lick his lips, lapping up any of your excess fluids. “Do you need a few minutes or can I fuck you now?” He asks, a slight eagerness in his voice.

“Fuck me” you breathe.

You maintain eye contact as he strips his shirt off, your mouth practically watering at the sight of him. You feel yourself almost ready to drool, after Han takes off his pants and boxers, allowing his large, thick and veiny cock to spring free.

Han smirks as he looks down at his very erect cock before looking back at you. “It's not going to suck itself.” He says.

A wide grin appears on your face as you sit up and crawl towards him. You slide off the bed and directly onto your knees and open your mouth up widely, taking in as much of him as you could. He begins starting slowly, gently thrusting himself in and out of your mouth. With every pump, his thrusts become harder and faster as he snaps his hips harshly. Tears begin forming in your eyes as he rams his cock down your throat.

Almost as quickly as he began, he pulls himself out of your mouth, stumbling back while catching his breath.

"I can't cum yet." He says, pulling you up off the floor before pushing you back on the bed. He quickly grabs a condom, rolling it on his cock.

He spreads your legs before lining himself up with your entrance. Slowly he pushes his large cock inside you, stretching your walls. He gives you almost no time to adjust, as he begins slowly pumping in and out of you.

His thrusts are slow but powerful, making you shiver every time he thrusts himself in, hitting your G spot without a problem. Without a word, his pumps quicken as he consistently rams himself into your dripping pussy, fucking you harder.

Han places his hand in-between your legs, spreading your lips to place his thumb on the exact spot you needed it. He begins rubbing you as he continues to fuck you. After a few more thrusts and quick circles from his thumb, a quick and sudden orgasm washes over you, pulsating through your body, leaving you breathless.

Han slams himself into you, and a few hard, and fast thrusts later he cums into the condom. After milking himself dry, he half collapses on top of you, as you both try to catch your breath. He rolls off of you, offering the shower for you to go and clean yourself up. You happily take the offer, enjoying the large shower and different soaps.

“Come lay down.” Han says, patting the spot beside him. He tosses you a shirt to put on before you crawl into bed with him, and you both quickly doze off with his arm draped over you.

When you woke up, you glanced at the clock, 4:53 in the morning. You roll out of the bed, quietly grabbing your belongings as Han lays in bed, peacefully sleeping, sprawled out on the bed. You walk over to the desk, writing a small note, thanking him for an amazing night, and apologizing for having to leave before he wakes up. You quickly slip on your underwear, take off the shirt he gave you, and put your dress on instead. You're holding your shoes as you sneak out of the room, rushing down the hallway towards the elevator. You felt like a woman of the night, sneaking out of a hotel room in the early hours of the morning. But you didn't get any form of payment so technically, you weren't. The judgment you could feel from the front desk workers said otherwise though.

You walk out of the hotel, waving down a cab. You get in, telling him your address to head home. You had an amazing night, but the only thing you regret about the entire thing is that you didn't leave him your number, but if it's meant to be then you both would find your way back to each other. You arrived home, paying your fare and heading into your building. You go straight into the shower, scrubbing your body, washing your hair until you finally feel clean. You dry yourself off, slipping into your pj's before crawling into your bed, drifting off to sleep very easily.

Later on in the day, you wake up, unfortunately. You really wanted to sleep longer but you glanced at your phone, seeing it was already 1pm, and you had about a million messages from Lisa. You opened up your chat, seeing her asking about your night and begging you to tell her if you hooked up with the man from the club or not. She was so desperate for you to get over Jaehyun and get under someone else. You knew she was going to be proud of you for actually doing it. You pressed the call button, and you swore the phone didn't even ring before she answered it.

“What happened!?” She yells. “Did you hook up? Please tell me you hooked up with him.” She gasps.

“Jesus, hello to you too.” You chuckle. “Yes we hooked up.” You say, thankful she can't see the large smile on your face.

“Yes! You slut! I love it!” She screams. “Let's go for lunch.” She suggests.

“I'm so nauseous.” You laugh. “Too much tequila.”

“We need tacos.” She says.

“Oh fuck, yes. Let's meet at Las Palapas.” You say.

“See you there in 30 minutes.” She screeches, hanging up the phone. You groaned loudly. Why did you suggest that? You just wanted to lay in bed and die, but instead you got up and headed to your closet, putting on leggings and a shirt, throwing your hair up and slipping on some tennis shoes. You grab your bag, breathing through your nausea as you head out to meet Lisa.

The tacos and margaritas definitely helped your hangover, you felt better as you and Lisa headed back to your apartment. She was trying to convince you to go out again that night and you weren't sure if you were gonna be up for it.

“You said you wanted to run into him again! What if you do tonight?” She squeals.

“I don't think I can.” You laugh. “I need to go to bed. I feel like a bag of shit.” You groan.

“Okay okay. I get it. Let's go watch some movies and eat some treats? Mhm?” She grins.

“That's perfect.” You say, linking your arms with hers as you head back to your apartment with your best friend.

**

A few months later, you're sitting in your bathroom, your entire body shaking as you wait. You look at the timer on your phone, 30 seconds left. You had been so nauseous for months, cramping, tender breasts. You didn't get your period anymore with your IUD, but you and Han had used a condom as well, there's no way you could be… right? Your phone beeps, telling you the 3 minutes is up. You pick up the small stick, turning it over. Tears instantly fall down your cheeks as you see the two lines, clear as day on the test.

“How am I pregnant?” You cry, setting the test back on the counter. You drop your head into your hands, sobbing. How the fuck were you supposed to get into contact with Han to let him know? You grab your phone, still sobbing as you scroll through your contacts, looking for Lisa's number. Your brain was scrambled, you could barely think. You scroll down, seeing a name you recognized but didn't know you had in your phone.

“Han Jisung.” You whisper. You click on the contact, placing the phone up to your ear.

“Hey there stranger.” He laughs, answering the phone. “It's been months. Didn't you know I put my number in your phone?” He asks.

You sniffle. “Han.” You cry.

“What happened? What's wrong?” He asks.

“I'm-I'm pregnant.” You whisper.

The call is silent. Han doesn't say anything. “Are you there?” You ask.

“We used a condom. You said you had an IUD.” He partially yells. “Or did you lie to me?” He asks.

“I didn't lie to you.” You say. “I do have an IUD. I don't know how this happened.” You cry.

“Do you even know who I am? This will ruin my fucking life and my goddamn reputation!” He yells. “Fuck!”

“It's not my fault! Maybe your condom was faulty!” You snap back.

“Yeah well we'll get this shit taken care of.” He snaps, hanging up the phone. You sit there still crying and now shaking even harder. What did he mean about his reputation? You click on Google on your phone, searching his name.

“Han Jisung… member of popular k-pop group Stray Kids…” You murmur. “Oh fuck. He's really fucking famous.” You gasp.

What the hell were you gonna do?

You waited for days. You waited for something, anything really from Han. But nothing came. Until the fourth day, when you had a knock at your door. You open it, and the man standing there, shoves an envelope at you before walking away. He said absolutely nothing to you.

You closed the door, walking to your kitchen table to open it. Pulling out a letter practically demanding you to come to Korea to have your IUD safely removed, while also having a DNA test done on your unborn child. You emptied the rest of the contents, dropping a one way plane ticket onto the table.

One that left tomorrow. You truly did not have much time to make your decision but you absolutely wanted to prove to Han and his agency that he was the father of your child. You hadn't been with anyone else since Jaehyun and that timeline just doesn't fit.

You left the papers down on the table, heading to your bedroom. You went into your closet, pulling out your suitcase, packing anything and everything you could think of that you'd need. You didn't know how long you would be there but you were going to make damn sure that Han was present for everything for his child.

“I'm gonna miss you.” Lisa sighs, hugging you tightly. “If you need anything and I mean anything, call me. And I'll be on the first flight there.” She finishes, pulling away from you.

“Thank you. I'll keep you updated on the shit show that is my life.” You sigh, grabbing your luggage and passport, heading into the airport. You sit in your assigned seat, anxiously waiting for the plane to take off. You feel like your heart is going to beat out of your chest as it begins to move. It's only a 9 hour flight. You could do this. You got this.

And you did. You slept almost the entire flight except when it was time to eat. You ate your meals and snacks before dozing back off again. The flight definitely didn't feel like 9 hours, it really only felt like a quick few hour flight and before you knew it the plane touched down in Korea, and you were ready to prove you weren't lying about anything.

Once you were off the plane, You grabbed your checked bag and headed out towards the doors of the airport. You almost missed him, the man standing, smiling holding up a sign with your name on it.

“Hi.” You smile. He nods to you, reaching for your luggage, taking it from you while motioning you to follow him. You do, looking around at the beautiful building, and all the gorgeous people who surrounded you. The man leads you to a car, opening the door for you before he puts your luggage in the trunk and then gets into the driver's seat, taking you away from the airport and hopefully to a hotel, where you could shower and rest before getting into it with everyone. But apparently that was wishful thinking.

The driver pulls up outside of a hospital. You knew it. They wanted to try and prove you were lying immediately. Jokes on them though. You take a deep breath, walking inside the building and immediately you're swarmed by 3 or 4 nurses, dragging you towards the elevator, everyone talking at once so you can't understand anything that's being said. Once you're in the elevator, you're taken up to the 4th floor. The nurses get out of the elevator, making space for a man to walk to you. You step off the elevator, he extends his hand for you to shake.

“Hi Y/N.” A man says. “Welcome.”

“Are you… JYP?” You ask.

“I'm not. I'm his assistant, Joshua.” He says. “And I want to apologize on behalf of JYP for this. It may seem unnecessary to you but this cannot get out. It's important we have all the correct information to be able to spin it properly.” He says. He brings you to a hospital room, guiding you inside. “Please, change into this gown and the doctors will get started soon.”

You do as you're told, wandering into the bathroom to get changed. You come out, placing your clothes on a chair before climbing into the bed.

“Where's Han?” You ask, just as Joshua was leaving the room.

“Han will be involved if the paternity comes back as his child.” He says, getting on the elevator.

“Hi, Y/N. I'm doctor Kim. I'll be removing the IUD for you and Dr. Lee will be doing the paternity testing.”

A nurse comes over, beginning an IV in your arm. “What is this?” You ask.

“Just something to help keep you calm.” Dr. Kim smiles through his mask. “Don't worry, the baby will be perfectly safe.”

The nurse hooks you up to the machines, you can feel the drugs beginning to help. You're relaxed and feeling so good. You barely feel Dr. Kim doing what he needs to do, you actually doze off for a minute while he works on you. When he's finished, your body feels weird but before you can ask him anything about it, another doctor walks in, sith a large thin needle.

“Hello, Y/N. I'm Dr. Lee.” He smiles.

“What is that?” You ask, feeling a little anxious about the big needle.

“This is for paternity testing. What I'm going to do is insert this needle into your abdomen, and take out some amniotic fluid, for the testing. We've already collected Han’s sample to compare it. So we'll have your results in a few hours.” He explains.

You nod your head, closing your eyes tightly. “You're going to feel a little poke.” He murmurs, inserting the needle into your stomach. You gasp loudly, wanting, no, needing it to be over quickly. Seconds later he pulls the needle out of your stomach, leaving the room with your sample. You lay there, breathing. In a few hours, they would all find out the truth and you couldn't wait. Your eyes begin to get heavy. It had been a long and stressful day,especially with the time difference. It didn't take you long to doze off, peacefully. Unfortunately you only got to sleep for a few hours before the doctors came back into your room.

“We have some news.” Dr. Kim begins. “While taking out the IUD was successful, there seems to have been a few complications. Which means you'll need to be on bed rest.” He explains.

“For how long?” You whisper.

“At least 2 months. Maybe three.” He announces.

“I'm here alone! I don't know, like, anyone! How am I supposed to be on bed rest here?” You cry. “Just let me fly home and I'll be on bed rest, I promise.” You say.

“You can't fly, Y/N.” Dr. Kim states. “Complete bed rest. Only getting up to use the bathroom. That's it.”

“Will it be here?” You ask, nervously.

“No.” Joshua says, stepping into the room. “You'll be moved to Han's dorm, with his band mates.” He says.

“Does this mean…” You trail off.

“Han is the father, yes.” Joshua sighs. You could see it in his eyes that he hated the fact that it came back that Han is the father.

“A nurse will be coming by with a wheelchair shortly.” He murmurs, looking down at his phone. “I have to take this. But I'll be waiting downstairs for you.” He finishes walking away.

You breathe a sigh of relief. There. Now he would know that you weren't lying. This really was his child. You knew he was likely scared. Hell, you were fucking terrified. But you were going to figure it out because that's what you do. A few minutes later, a smiling nurse walks into your room, pushing a wheelchair. “Let's get you dressed and then you can be on your way.” She says, helping you off the bed and into the bathroom. You were very slow moving, your body was sore, you felt weak. You really just wanted to sleep. You were nervous to go to Han's dorm. He reacted poorly to the news of your pregnancy, but you hoped that now that he's had time to process the information, he would be more excited.

Joshua stands beside a car as the nurse wheels you up to him. You slowly get up, sliding into the back seat of the car as Joshua gets into the front to drive.

“What about my suitcase?” You ask, remembering the man who picked you up from the airport only hours ago.

“It's already at the dorm.” Joshua replies, his eyes staying on the road. You nod your head as you watch out the window, admiring the beautiful structures of the city, watching the people as he goes down each road. With every turn of the car, you got more nervous. Soon you'd be facing Han and you honestly had no idea what you were going to say to him.

Joshua stops the car in front of a building, coming around the side to open your door and help you out of the car. “Come on, you heard what the doctor said. You have to stay in bed.” He says, helping you up the stairs to the door. He opens the door, revealing seven men sitting in the living room talking. As soon as you walk in, the entire room goes silent. They all sit and stare at you, until one of them gets up, a large smile on his face.

“You must be Y/N.” He grins, pulling you in for a hug. “I'm Chan. If you need anything, please don't hesitate to ask.” He says.

“Yeah, yeah, we can do this later. She needs to be in bed.” Joshua grumbles, guiding you to a room. He opens the door, revealing a very plain room with a queen size bed in the middle. Your suitcase was emptied and put away, all your clothes either hung up in the closet or were put away in the drawers. Luckily you were still wearing comfy clothes, and had absolutely no ambition to change, so you crawled into bed, getting cozy under the blankets.

“I've left my number on your bedside table should you need anything. Or any of the boys know how to reach me. Don't hesitate to call.” He says, giving you a half smile before leaving the room.

You roll over facing the wall. You close your eyes, but before you can fall asleep the door creaks open. You turn your head to look and see Han standing there.

“Han.” You whisper, sitting up the best you can.

“Don't.” He harshly snaps. “I know you fucking planned this. You knew who I was didn't you? You're just some low class whore looking for a payday, huh?” He spits.

“I didn't know who you were!” You yell. You can feel the tears threatening to fall from your eyes. You didn't want to cry. Not in front of him. “I swear to god, I didn't plan this.”

“Yeah, we'll see about that. I don't want this kid, so tomorrow I'll have someone take you to the clinic and get it taken care of. Then you can go back home and we can fucking forget about it all.” He says.

“What?” You gasp. “No, absolutely not. I'm not getting rid of our baby.” You whisper.

“Don't. Don't say our baby. It's not ours if I don't want it. 9am, tomorrow.” He says, walking out of the room, slamming the door behind him. You weren't sure how, but you were going to protect your child, no matter what.

You cried yourself to sleep that night. You didn't want the next day to come. You didn't want Han to barge into the room demanding that you go to a clinic. So the next morning when there was a faint knock at your door, your stomach dropped and anxiety flowed through your entire body. The door opens, and Chan's head peeks around the corner.

“Hi.” He smiles. “Han has a schedule today, so he's not here. He said you wanted to go to the clinic today and asked me to take you.” He whispers.

You sit up in bed, shaking your head. “He wants me to go to the clinic today.” You say. “I don't want to.”

“He wants you to… get…” he trails off. You nod your head, crying again.

“I know you don't know me, but I know Han.” He says, walking into the room. “He's scared. He's terrified about what this means for the group and him as an artist. If it gets out it has the potential to ruin him. And I know he's not handling it very well. But if you need anything. One of us will always be home. Please just yell out if you need anything. Okay?” He says.

“Thank you.” You whisper. Chan leaves the room, and you curl back up in bed, feeling a little more relieved, and like someone finally has your back. A little bit later, you decide to get up and go to the bathroom. The only problem is, you weren't sure where the bathroom was. You were sure it wouldn't be an issue for you to get up and wander around to find the bathroom. You really need to stretch your legs, have a shower, and also eat something. You crawled out of bed, shuffling your feet to the dresser to grab some new clothes before heading to the door. You opened it a crack, peering out to see if anyone was there. But there was no one. You go into the hallway, walking slowly and carefully, looking in each door. All bedrooms.

“What are you doing?” You hear from behind you. You jump at the sound of the voice, turning around.

“I was just looking for the bathroom.” You whisper to the unknown man.

“Oh.” He smiles. “It's this way.” He says, pointing in the opposite direction.

“Thank you.” You say, walking towards him.

“I'm Changbin. It's nice to meet you, Y/N.” He smiles.

“It's nice to meet you too. Thank you for your help.” You say.

“It's not a problem. Let me know if you need anything else.” He says, walking away. You walk into the bathroom, placing your clothes on the counter before you start the shower.

Once you were done, you felt so much better. You dried yourself off, got dressed and placed your clothes back into your room before heading towards where you thought the kitchen was.

You see Changbin again with another man, who looks at you with wide eyes. “What are you doing up? Bed rest means bed rest!” The man says, scolding you.

“I'm hungry.” You say. You felt embarrassed, even though you shouldn't. You couldn't help it.

“Here, on the couch. We'll order or make you something.” He says. “I'm Jeongin by the way.”

“Thank you.” You smile, settling down on the couch. Jeongin hands you the remote before heading back to the kitchen with Changbin. As you scrolled through shows you could hear them whispering about neither of them knowing how to cook.

“Let's just order her something.” Jeongin says. Changbin agrees.

You pick a show, settling in on the couch. 20 minutes later there's a knock at the door. Changbin rushes towards the door, answering it, grabbing a large bag of food from the delivery driver before paying him. He sets it down on the coffee table in front of you, grinning widely.

“Let's eat!” He exclaims as Jeongin comes to sit on the couch as well. The three of you eat your food, laughing at the TV show while enjoying your delicious food. You had almost forgotten about what Han had wanted you to do this morning. A few hours later the front door opens, and Han walks in.

He looks at you, Jeongin and Changbin hanging out and immediately looks displeased. “The fuck is going on?” He asks.

“We were just hanging out with her. She needed to eat.” Changbin says, shrugging her shoulders.b

“Did you do what I told you to do today?” Han asks you.

“No.” You whisper.

“What the fuck, Y/N!” He snaps. “I asked you to do one thing! And this one thing would take care of the whole fucking situation you got us into!” Han spits.

“Han…” Jeongin says. He ignores him.

“Last time I checked, it takes two to make a fucking baby.” You snap back. “I'm sorry you don't want it. I'm sorry that you think I'm purposefully trying to ruin your life, and I'm sorry that I had to come all the way here for this shit. Believe me I tried to get the doctors to let me go back home so I wouldn't be a burden to you but I can't. I'm stuck here, where I'm clearly unwanted, with a baby that's unwanted by its father. You don't think that's hard on me?” You scream.

Hans' face drops. He stares at the floor for a second before his hateful look is back. “Whatever. Just stay out of my way. You guys can look after her then.” He says, storming out of the living room.

The hormones are too strong. You begin to sob on the couch, and it was awkward. Changbin and Jeongin didn't know what to do. They look at each other, worried. Until the front door opens again, in walking more people you didn't recognize and Chan.

“Why's she crying?” Chan asks. “What happened?”

“Han happened.” Changbin sighs. “He's really fucking mean.”

“Y/N.” Chan sighs. “Don't listen to him.”

“Yeah, don't listen to him. He's an idiot.” Another one says. “I'm Felix. This is Hyunjin, Seungmin and Minho.” He says, introducing the rest of them.

You wipe away your tears, trying to force a smile, waving to them all.

“I know what we need.” Felix pipes up again. He looks at Changbin and smiles.

“Movie night.” They both speak at the same time. Seconds later everyone is rushing around, a few leaving to go get snacks, others debating on which movie to watch. They made you feel so included, asking you what movie you wanted, what snacks you wanted. They included you in conversations, even if you had no idea what they were talking about. They were all so fun and kind, and you were starting to feel better about the entire situation.

Everyday you were feeling better and better about where you were and who you were with. At least when Han wasn't around. One day Chan showed up at the dorm with a pen and a journal, to help you let out your anger and frustrations, especially since you couldn't do anything else. Over the next two months, your stomach grew, the baby started kicking and all the boys were so excited. Always touching your stomach to feel the kicks, they waited on you all the time, getting you whatever craving you were feeling that day. They were like the big brothers you never had but always wanted. You were happy, until Han came back home. And sometimes you were alone in the dorm when he was back and he was cold towards you, and if he spoke to you he was hurtful and rude.

Until one day he stopped saying mean things to you and he began being nicer. Everyday he came back home and smiled at you. He started helping you, even if you had asked one of the others to do it. He was present and different. It was like something suddenly changed. Han walked into the dorm, 3 months after you'd been there on bed rest, and he smiled at you. Like he had for the last few weeks and it was as gorgeous as ever.

“How um, how are you feeling?” He asks.

“I'm feeling okay.” You murmur.

“That's good. Oh, uh Joshua wanted me to let you know that you have an ultrasound next week. He said you can find out the sex of the baby.” He tells you.

You perk up. “Really? Oh I've been waiting for that.” You smile.

“Would I…be able to come?” He asks. “I'd like to find out too.”

“I thought you didn't want the baby.” You say. It still hurts to think about that. The fact that he so desperately wanted nothing to do with you or your child.

“I didn't… to be completely honest with you, I'm so fucking scared. I'm scared of what this means for me…for the group. I'm scared of everything. But I've been listening to the guys over the last few weeks, talking about you and the baby, gushing about what it's going to be like to have a baby at the dorm and how excited they are. So I started doing some research… and I'm sorry. I'm sorry for the way I treated you. I'm sorry for the way I handled everything. Being scared isn't an excuse, I'm sure you're scared but I didn't think about you or how my actions and words affected you.” He says.

You want to believe him. You wanted things to be okay between the two of you but how could you? He'd been so nasty towards you and suddenly he comes back home apologizing and wanting to be involved? That scared you. What happens if he gets scared again and turns back into the nasty man he had been before?

“Is that why you've been so nice lately?” You ask. He nods his head. “I appreciate you saying that. I'm terrified and this hasn't been easy. But if you want to be involved, I need to know you're in it for the long haul. And you're not gonna switch up on me.” You say.

“I am. Totally and 100% I am in it. I won't go back.” He urges.

“And it's gonna take time.” You tell him.

“Whatever it takes.” He smiles.

The next week, Han is helping you down the stairs of the dorm, heading to the car for your appointment. He opens the car door for you, before rushing around to the other side to sit next to you in the back. You both buckle in as the driver takes off to the clinic.

“What do you think it'll be?” You ask Han as you lay on the bed waiting for the tech.

“Honestly I think it's gonna be a girl.” He laughs.

“So do I!” You say. “A healthy baby is the goal.”

“Absolutely.” Han smiles. “I promise you, Y/N. I'm gonna love that baby with everything I have.”

The technician walks into the room, greeting you both before getting to work. After taking all the necessary pictures, she looks at the two of you. “Would you like to know the gender?” She asks.

“Yes!” You both say.

“Okay.” She giggles. “Well… it looks like you're having a healthy little…. Girl! Congratulations.” She says.

“A girl.” You whisper. You look up at Han with tears in your eyes.

“A healthy baby girl.” He responds, placing a kiss on your forehead.

A little while later the two of you head back inside the dorm. Han helps you up the stairs, helping to guide you into the dorm, where six men stand around, eagerly anticipating the news.

“What is it!?” Jeongin yells.

“What are we having!?” Changbin asks, making you and Han laugh.

“We are proud to announce…” You pause, glancing over at Han.

“We're having a healthy baby… girl!” Han yells. The living room erupts into cheers as they all rush towards the two of you, congratulating you both. Everyone was so happy, until Chan rushed into the dorm. You turn to tell him the good news but he looks worried.

“What's wrong?” You ask.

“We've got a problem.” He sighs. “Somehow the news broke about Han becoming a dad. It's everywhere online. There's even pictures of the two of you.” He says, showing you both his phone. You see pictures of Han helping you to the car, your hand resting on your belly. Pictures of you both walking into the clinic, and walking out happy and excited.

“Who would do this?” You gasp.

“You'd be surprised how crazy fans get over their favs.” Felix mentions.

“What do we do?” You say, looking between Chan and Han.

Han looks at you and smiles. “It'll all be okay. I promise.” He says, squeezing your hand. You wanted to believe him, but you weren't sure if he even believed it.

Over the next few weeks, everything had gone downhill. Han was gone so much trying to figure out who leaked the story and how to handle everything. While you spent your days reading the comments online.

“What an ugly fucking bitch. How dare she trap hannie!”

“She must have drugged him! There's no way he'd willingly sleep with her.”

“She's totally just using him for his money. I bet the baby isn't even his!”

“If I see her out, I'll kill her myself!”

You spent your days crying over all the mean comments you kept receiving. You didn't know these people, how could they make such vile comments about you? They didn't know what really happened, not that they'd believe you anyways. Han constantly told you everyday to stay off the internet and not to read the comments. But you couldn't help it. You had never done anything to anyone, you couldn't wrap your head around what they were saying about you.

“Oh baby.” Han murmurs, walking into his room. He sees you sitting on his bed, tears in your eyes as you read the multiple death threats from the same person that managed to find your Instagram.

“This person wants me to die so badly.” You whimper.

“No baby, no. You can't be reading this stuff. Those people aren't fans. They're just people who can't be happy if we're happy.” He sighs.

“Are you happy?” You ask.

“Unbelievably happy. I promise you.” He smiles. “The reason I came in here was because I have good news.” He says, helping you and your belly out of the bed.

“What is it?” You sniffle.

“You are officially off bed rest!” He yells.

“Oh my god. Really!?” You exclaim. “Finally!” You were so happy, you were going fucking crazy being stuck in bed or on the couch for the last few months.

“So to celebrate, I thought we could go do some baby shopping?” He smiles. “We need a lot. And I didn't want to go get anything without you.”

“You're so sweet.” You pout. “Yes please! Let's go!” You say, ready to waddle out of the room. Han helps you slip on your comfiest shoes, before taking your hand in his, leading you out to the car.

The two of you head into the first store, where you pick out a crib, and a car seat. You walk down the street hand in hand, looking in the windows of other stores, cooing at the adorable baby girl clothes that were on display.

“Oh shoot.” Han says, feeling around his pants pocket. “I left something in the car. Stay here.” He smiles, placing a kiss on your lips. “I'll be right back.” You watch him run back down the street, not terribly far from where you were.

“It's you.” You hear from behind you. “The one who stole my man.” You turn around seeing a disgruntled woman standing in front of you.

“What?” You ask. Trying to wrap your brain around what was happening. But she gave you no time.

“He's mine!” She screams, lunging towards you. You feel a sharp, piercing pain in your stomach. Your mouth hangs open as you look down. She plunges the knife deeper into your stomach. You gasp for air as she twists it. You can hear Han screaming for you. He runs towards you, and the lady rips the knife out of your stomach, dropping it before taking off. You immediately collapse to the ground, blood spilling from your stomach, and seeping from your mouth.

“Y/N. Baby… breathe. Stay with me.” He begs. “Someone call an ambulance! Please!” He cries. “Someone help me! Please help me!” He screams, putting pressure on your wound.

It didn't take long for the ambulance to show up. They worked quickly as a bloody Han stood back, in shock. “We're losing her!” The paramedic yells. They swiftly put you in the back of the ambulance, Han climbing in after you. He holds your hand as they work on you.

“Please.” He cries. “Please save them… please don't let them die.”

“Sir. You need to wait in the waiting room.” The nurse urges him, as he tries to follow you into the emergency room. He stumbles back as he watches them roll you back and out of sight. He pulls out his phone, his hands covered in your almost dried blood. He dials the one number he knew would be able to get them all here.

“Chan.” He cries.

“Did you do the proposal? Did she say yes?” Chan asks.

Han had completely forgotten about the ring box that bulged out of his pocket now. Had he not forgotten it in the car, maybe this wouldn't have happened. Or had he brought you to the car with him, maybe you'd be wearing it right now. But he had a plan. He wanted it to be perfect and he hadn't wanted you to see what he was grabbing from the car.

“She… she was stabbed.” Han sobs. “T-They took her back… I don't know if she's alive. I don't know if my baby is alive.” He whispers.

“We're on our way.” Chan yells, hanging up the phone.

Only minutes later, seven men rush into the hospital, surrounding Han, who is sitting with his head in his hand, sobbing.

“What the fuck happened?” Changbin asks, sitting next to Han, putting his hand on his back.

“I forgot… the ring in the car. I ran back to go get it.” He sniffles. “She was waiting for me… I grabbed the box and looked back at her and someone stabbed her in the stomach.” He weeps.

They're all silent. No one knows what to say. They all know nothing they can say will make anything about this situation better. So they all sat in silence, just being there for him. Whatever he needed.

It took hours. Hours for someone to come and talk to Han to let him know what was going on.

“L/N Y/N.” The doctor yells. Han stands up, rushing to the doctor.

“Yes, how is she? How's my baby? Can I see them?” He asks.

The doctor takes his scrub cap off, looking down. “We took her into surgery. It was touch and go for a while. We delivered the baby… but there was nothing we could do. I'm so sorry.” He whispers.

Han drops to his knees, sobbing. “Please..what about Y/N.”

“There's a lot of internal damage. She's in a medically induced coma. We're not sure how it's going to play out. There's a 50/50 chance she'll survive.” The doctor says. “You can see her, if you want.” He says.

Han stands up, silently following the doctor to your room. He stands in the doorway, taking it all in. You're hooked up to every machine possible, one that's helping you breathe, one that's keeping track of your heart. He was dreading the day he had to tell you that your precious baby passed away. He walks into the room, sitting in the chair beside your bed. He grabs your hand crying as he squeezes it.

“Please be okay. Baby I need you to be okay. I can't lose you both… I love you Y/N. I love you, I need you to wake up. Please.” He sobs.

Everyday for weeks, Han sits in your room, waiting, praying and hoping that you'll wake up. And everyday, nothing changes, the doctors don't have answers. No one has any answers and it was driving him crazy.

“Okay baby, I'm just gonna go home and shower. It's been a while. Please wake up. Wake up for me, okay?” He says, placing a kiss on your forehead.

A little later, Han gets out of the shower, heading into his room where your stuff stayed. Your clothes still hung in his closet, your things still scattered around the room. He sat on his bed, grabbing the pillow you always used. It still smelt like you. He holds it tightly, glancing over at where it is usually placed. He sees a notebook laying there. He knew he shouldn't, but he needed to. He grabbed the book, the first half he skipped. He couldn't bear to read about how you felt when he was so mad at you and everyone. He knew he hurt you so deeply, but he could relive that right now.

He smiles as he reads what you wrote about how he suddenly changed. How he was being nice and attentive. How you were suspicious of his actions. It made him laugh, for the first time in weeks. You had every right to be suspicious of him, but he was glad you let him prove to you how serious he had been. He flips through a few more pages.

“Dear diary.” He reads. “I can't stop thinking about the future. Han is going to be the best dad. He is so excited for our little girl to come into the world and I can't wait to watch him with a mini version of him and I. I'm so in love with him, I don't know what to do. I want to tell him, but I can't be the first one. Our little girl will be here in a few weeks and I'm so scared. But I know everything will be okay as long as he's by my side. I can't wait to see what the future brings for me and my little family. I've never been so happy in my entire life. Everything feels complete.” He reads. He can't stop the tears from rolling down his cheeks.

Before he can read more, his phone rings. He sets down your diary, and picks up his phone from on the bed.

“Hello?” He sniffles.

“Han Jisung?” The person on the other line asks.

“This is he.” He answers.

“This is nurse Song from the hospital. I'm so sorry to do this over the phone…” She begins.

“No.” He whispers. “Please… please don't.”

“Y/N passed away this afternoon. Her body just wasn't strong enough to heal. We truly did everything we could to save her. I'm so very sorry for your loss.” She finishes.

Han drops his phone on the floor. His chest tightens, he feels like he can't breathe. But he's not scared. His head is dizzy, he feels unstable.

“Please let this be it.” He whispers, clutching his chest. It was getting harder to catch his breath as his chest tightened even more. “Please, take me to my girls.” He groans, falling to the floor. His eyes close as he welcomes the darkness, desperate to see the two he loved the most once again.

aloneness | by design chapter one

pairing: chan x reader ; hyunjin x reader | wc: 16.2k | genre: adult romance, angst | warnings: childhood best friends to lovers ; heavy angst ; death and grieving ; complicated feelings ; failed relationships ; explicit sexual content. the chapter contains heavy themes that could be upsetting to some. if you're concerned it might be an issue for you, please read the unabridged list of warnings, which also contains nsfw warnings. reader discretion is advised. this work is for adult audiences since it contains mature themes and explicit sexual content.

It had been such a long while, it seemed, since Chris had truly loved you. And you loved him in a desperate way, like trying to hold onto a knife not by its handle, but by its blade.

To be intimate with love, the true kind, also means being intimate with loss.

You grew up in a small enough town that most faces you saw, every day, were familiar ones. The employees at the grocery store saw you become a teenager and later, an adult. You were greeted by your first name if you stepped into the post office. You had become acquainted with specific trees, the twists of certain roads, or the lines of the mountains on the horizon. By no means did that make your life dull, not by your standards anyway. The town’s name is Stormhaven—named so by its founders because of the violent storm that raged the first night they established camp on this land. As grand and frightening as the storm was, it was equally beautiful. Something about the geolocation of the city or perhaps the fact that it’s located where the river melts into the sea makes it prone to storms, and they are, indeed, reputed to be gorgeous.

You did leave momentarily though,  to pursue some major you had no great interest in, but it felt right to try and do something. You were the first of your family to go to college. You thought, foolishly perhaps, that you could teach English—you had always been one to read books and enjoy the intricacies of the language in them. To you, words were no different than pigment, sentences were the oil that made the paint, and books were the finished product, the saturated canvas. Now, here’s the thing—you liked English and you liked art, too, thanks to a book you found at the age of 9 on your uncle’s bookshelf. It was your first introduction to the Italian masters and their masterpieces, and you were a little too young to fully comprehend it, but that did not stop you from appreciating it. 

You were the first of your family to go to college. Your parents owned a small general store on the north side of the city, where there’s more forest than city. It’s perfectly situated though—directly on the one road that leads to the good fishing spots. 

The river is at its narrowest there, narrow enough that if one spoke out loud, they could be heard on the other side when people stood on the shore. There was another camping ground there, and cabins, and if the river was gentle enough, it wasn’t uncommon for people to go across it to make new acquaintances. 

You grew up there, in this place loved by locals and tourists alike. Your family was friends with the family that owned the camping ground down the hill, and it helped make business good for everybody involved. 

It also made your summers a lot less boring—you were an only child, with aloneness often forced on you. And it could have been awful if the owners of the camping ground didn’t have a son who happened to be the same age as you.

Chris was always ‘the good guy’, which, at times, rendered being his friend difficult. Because you had to live up to the standard. You had to deserve it somehow. Chris himself never made you feel this way, of course not, it was only fueled by your own compulsion to compare yourself to him at all times. Chris was a good kid, smart, funny, and nice, and he looked good. It made him very popular with the girls on the camping ground. You weren’t particularly popular with the boys. Or with the girls.

Aloneness forced on you. Defining you, almost. 

Except Chris made sure you were never left out. He always introduced you as his best friend and brought you along even though his fangirls clearly didn’t appreciate you being around. Either Chris was oblivious to it or he just didn’t care—in any case, you spent all of your summers with him, from sunrise to sunset and sometimes after. Chris attended the private school in the next town over, so you didn’t see him a whole lot during the year. Still, your family visited his once in a while for dinner, and you and Chris would hang out in the basement to watch movies and eat potato chips. Life had been easy, once.

It would be a lie to say that everything went smoothly all the time with him. When both of you reached an age where hormones are raging, things got a little complicated. Chris got in a fight—a physical fight—with his best friend during a party. It was just before tourist season. Your parents had gone for a couple weeks for a long overdue vacation—they trusted you and Mrs. Bahng with the store, knowing you could handle it, especially since it wasn’t very busy yet. Of course, you threw a party—a low-key one, just a few people. Some guys from Chris’ school also came along. 

By then, Chris was a handsome young man, charming without trying to be, with a dorkish laugh and a good heart. If somebody had asked you if you had a crush on him then, you would have said no, but you would have been lying to them and to yourself. 

The party quickly took a turn when some of Chris’ friends pulled out the liquor they’d brought. It made you nervous. This was your house after all, and if something happened, your parents would never trust you again. You tasted vodka for the first time that night. First in a red plastic cup, mixed with some cheap lemonade, and after that, on the lips of Chris’ friend when he pulled you to a quiet corner to make out with you. His name was Liam. You saw him once in a while when he spent the night at Chris’ place or something. He wasn’t as popular with girls as Chris was and you suspected he was jealous of him, but then, who wouldn’t be? 

However, Liam turned out to be a little too insistent, touching you in places, and whispering things to your ear. You made up some excuse and fled to your backyard where most people had come to enjoy a small bonfire. You sat with them but your mind was elsewhere, wondering if you ought to let Liam do to you whatever it was he wanted. After all, you weren’t popular, and nobody wanted to date you. Liam was the first guy who kissed you for more than three seconds and who touched you. There might not be one after, so perhaps you shouldn’t pass on that opportunity. 

He did join you by the fire. Liam. He sat not next to you but behind you, his legs locking you in his embrace. It wasn’t even the worst PDA taking place in the group as one of your friends was heavily making out with one of the boys while the others talked. You participated in the conversation, not unaware of the glances Chris shot you a little too often. Maybe, after all, it wouldn’t be a good idea to have sex with his friend. Maybe that made him upset, and you could understand that—he had never pursued any of your friends and had always made it very clear he wasn’t interested in them. You figured he expected the same of you.

But Liam kissed the back of your neck. And then he touched you again and again—your waist, your back, your thighs. He held you in his arms and it birthed a distracting tingling sensation between your legs that you couldn’t blame on the vodka. “Come with me upstairs,” he said into your ear. And you did. You went. 

He kissed you even more in your bedroom, his hands underneath your shirt, his mouth sloppy and wet, too wet. It all happened very fast—you were on your bed and then he was on top of you and he was very hard. It happened so fast, too fast for you to fully process it. It only lasted a few seconds—two thrusts, no more. In between the first and the second, it occurred to you that you hadn't used a condom. And then Liam whimpered pathetically and it was over.

It made you want to throw up, or maybe it was the vodka. Or, maybe, it was just the smell of him—sweat and cheap cigarettes and his musk, which was rather unpleasant in your nose. 

You slid from underneath him, visibly dazed, and it made him upset. Years later, you realized he was mostly upset at himself and ashamed of his premature... conclusion. Still, it was at you he lashed out, maybe for not looking like you had just gotten the dick of the century.

“Don’t be like that,” he told you, shoving his small, softening cock back into his pants.

His sour tone, paired with the soreness between your legs, brought tears to your eyes. It made him more upset even. "What's EVEN the problem anyway?" He raised his voice at you, and whenever someone did that, it always made you cry.

Unfortunately for him, Chris had made his way upstairs, suspecting something wasn’t quite right. He tried to open the door but it was locked. “Let me in.” His voice was unrecognizable, to the point that it frightened you almost. You still felt weird between your legs, sore and empty and full all at once. And above all, unclean. Dirty. You wanted nothing more than showering and washing Liam off you.

“Fucking let me in.”

Liam was very drunk. Instead of post-nut clarity, he had been hit by a strong dose of dopamine that rendered him even less coherent than he had been before. “What is it, Bang? You upset I jumped your virgin friend before you could?”

It occurred to you at that moment that you had never seen Chris angry before, except for fun like when he was playing video games. But something in his voice let you know that the situation was very serious. 

And then he smashed the door open using his shoulder. What happened next would always remain a bit blurry in your memory, but it never left either. Chris grabbed Liam by the collar of his shirt and slammed him against the wall. And then they fought. It was nasty. Liam was taller and bigger than Chris, but he was also drunker—Chris, on the other hand, was quick and properly pissed off. Before you knew it, Liam was pinned to the ground under Chris’ weight, being punched repeatedly in the face. Years later, you would admit this to Christopher—that it felt good to see his fist sink into Liam’s face, to see his lip split open, to hear his whining. Still, you knew it was wrong. Something within you, that night, knew that Chris could seriously injure Liam if he didn’t stop, so you stopped him. 

You stopped Chris, too, when he threatened to reprise his attack as Liam was stirring up. You just wanted everyone gone so he made them leave. You heard more shouting from outside but paid it no mind and just went into the bathroom and turned the shower on.

You stood underneath the water, keeping it as hot as you could, scalding your skin, rubbing soap all over yourself as hard as you could using various tools—a washcloth didn’t really cut it, and neither did your loofah or even your nails. In the end, it was your exfoliating cloth that you used to cleanse your body, emptying your bottle of shower gel, steaming up the entire bathroom. But you washed and washed and washed and rinsed and rinsed and rinsed. You did so until you could no longer feel Liam between your legs, only your skin made sensitive from all the scrubbing. 

Chris was waiting for you, sitting on the floor in the hallway. You had wrapped a towel around your body but it was dark and you didn’t care. You could walk naked outside for all you cared. 

That night, Chris took your face in his bloody, shaking hands and asked you if you were okay. You felt strangely okay, like you should have been sobbing or afraid but you were neither of these things. He, on the other hand, didn’t look too good with bruises and cuts on his face and even more on his knuckles. “Your mom will kill you,” you pointed out. The Bahngs preached pacifism. They were some of the nicest people you had ever met.

That night, you put on some comfortable clothes and made Chris sit in the bathroom while you cleaned his wounds. He insisted he could do it and you knew he could but you wanted to. You needed to do something, something useful if at all possible, and he let you, apologizing the whole time for letting Liam come here, and for being his friend in the first place. “He wasn’t like that before,” he assured you.

People change. You didn’t know what to say. There was nothing to say.

That night, Chris tucked you in bed but you asked him to stay, so he stayed, holding you in his arms. 

You spent that summer working both at the general store and at the campground. You worked a lot and when it raised suspicions in your parents, you simply said you were saving up for college so they didn’t question it. Chris knew, however, that you just needed to keep your mind, and body, busy. So, when there was no work for you to do, he took you on hikes. Hours-long hikes where neither of you really spoke. You just walked side by side. The more summer advanced, the farther you went. 

You started talking again at one point, for no reason at all. It just happened. Chris told you about his upcoming school year and how he still wasn’t exactly sure what he should be doing with his life. That he felt bad he wanted to leave Stormhaven, that he knew his father expected him to take over the business. You felt the same way. You were scared of the future because you didn’t know what you were supposed to do with your life. When you mentioned it, Chris assured you he thought you’d be a great teacher. You returned the compliment, telling him he would be at home in business school, and that it didn’t mean he had to take over the camping ground. He could do something else. 

It’d be great if we went to the same college, he said, and you agreed. It would, indeed, be great. By now, Chris had become something to you that couldn’t quite be defined by words—a best friend? Yes, perhaps. But it was more than that. He took care of you in a way that was so beautiful and so deep, you knew you could never repay him, that you would always be in his debt.

You loved him. And maybe you knew he loved you, too. 

You worked a lot that summer, even picking up shifts at a gardening center in town, owned by one of your friends’ dad. You didn’t think your absolute need to remain busy had anything to do with Liam. You were over it in the sense that few girls get to experience a wonderful and romantic ‘first time’ and that it hadn’t lasted very long anyway. You were over it, too, because Chris was there for you. 

You were over it because both you and Liam were drunk and stupid and young. 

It wasn’t what troubled you really. The problem was that it felt good to be desired for once. You had wanted Liam to touch you, and you had been flattered to feel him through his pants when you sat between his legs. It had even aroused you. The problem was that you didn’t really want to fuck Liam but you let him do it even though you knew deep down that it was a stupid thing to do. Because it was still better than being unwanted, than having aloneness forced on you.

And you felt disgusting for thinking that way. 

You worked so much it made you ill—one day, when you were helping Mr. Bahng and Chris clean up a few campsites, you had a dizzy spell so intense you momentarily passed out, waking up a few seconds later, laying on your back on the soft soil. It was particularly hot that day, especially considering the summer was ending and you were returning to school the week after. Mr. Bahng made you drink water while Chris cooled you down, pouring water into his hands and pressing them on your neck and face. When you regained some color, he was instructed by his dad to take you home—not on foot, of course, on the company’s ATV. It was almost like a walk of shame when Chris dropped you at your place. You kept telling him you were fine but it didn’t exactly feel like it. You just didn’t want him to go out of his way for you. 

Your mother was home and she already knew everything because Christopher’s dad called her. She made you go to bed, saying she would make you a good meal with broth. But you couldn’t stomach the sandwich she made. Or the broth. 

There was a storm that night, quite strong. Chris stayed with you even though you asked him not to. He said he liked you even though he saw you throw up, and tried to make jokes about it. He made you laugh that night, and it was your most heartfelt laugh in a while. You weren’t scared when the power went out because he was there. 

By then, you knew that you loved him in a special way. It made you feel a lot of things when he held you in his arms or when he kissed the top of your head. 

You kept a small battery-powered light in your bathroom, especially for nights like these. You reached for it in the drawer it had always been, and instead of the light, your fingers wrapped themselves around something else, something innocuous, an everyday item. An unopened box of tampons. 

Your whole world collapsed around you, except it was you who fell to your knees, suddenly completely unable to carry your own weight. Your heart ran marathons in your chest and you froze. It was how Chris found you. He looked at you, then at the tampons, and at you again. 

Then he was on his knees too, wrapping his arms around you. The storm outside matched the one in your heart. You had never been as scared as this in your whole life. You didn’t even cry—you just sat in bed, all night, watching the lightning over the river, staring at the stormy sky, thinking, thinking, thinking. You went through every possible scenario you could think of, and in none of them did it make sense to remain pregnant. 

Chris, once again, was there the whole time, not leaving your side that night and taking responsibility for you the next morning. With his brand new driver’s license—not his learner’s—he took his dad’s car and drove both of you two towns away so you could purchase a pregnancy test. He was the one to go into a store and buy three of three different brands. “To make sure,” he told you. You did the first test and it came out positive. 

The second also. You didn’t need to do the third, so you discarded it. You did cry then, in the not-so-clean bathroom stall of a mall you weren’t familiar with. Just a few tears. What went through your mind was this—that just because you had been greedy, just because you wanted to feel desired for one night, you were going to destroy something beautiful.  

Chris was there for you. He held your hands while you made appointments. He drove you two hours away from home just to make sure nobody would know where you went, telling his parents he was taking you to some event you had never heard of. A two-day event, so it would require the trip to be an overnight one. They bought it. They didn’t even care that you would share a hotel room. Your parents trusted Chris. On the first day, you had a lot of tests done. On the morning of the second day, they proceeded to the abortion. It took about five minutes, then it was over. You stared at the ceiling as the doctor was ridding your body of the consequence of your impure greed. During those five minutes, you reflected on how selfish you were. 

Chris stayed with you while you rested at the clinic. You shared some juice with him. Sometimes the cramps hurt you so bad you couldn’t talk, but it only lasted a few seconds. He held your hand. When you were free to go, he drove you two back to the hotel and you took a nap after having a small dose of the painkillers they gave you. It was over but it had never truly begun, and it felt strange. You felt empty. While you were sleeping, Chris went to the nearest drug store and bought just about every type of maxi pad he found. You bled a lot, and it hurt a lot, too.

Chris ordered pizza but you weren’t hungry. You made yourself eat a few bites and showered in very hot water. That night, he tucked you into bed but you asked him to stay, which meant you wanted him by your side and not on the other bed. He looked at you like he was hoping you would say that.

Christopher kissed you on the lips. Just a kiss, lips on lips, almost chaste, and you knew then that you would marry him someday. He kissed you again on your forehead and you buried your face into his neck. 

“I never thought I wanted children before,” you admitted to him. “What if it was wrong to get the abortion?”

“There’s still time,” he promised you. There was a long silence after that, but he added, “You made the right decision for your future. We’ll have a baby someday, okay? You and I.”

You believed him. And you were happy that year, when you realized, finally, that you had let Liam do this to you because you wanted Chris to do it, and you did not think he could ever feel the same way. 

You weren’t accepted into the very renowned university Chris was going to, but your college was just an hour-long drive away so it wasn’t too bad. You saw each other as often as you could during the first semester, but things got complicated as time went on. He was more and more busy and you were less and less enthusiastic about your studies. It turned out, English and teaching English were two very different worlds, and you did not belong in the latter. You couldn’t believe you were being tested on some supposed ‘ways’ to teach certain things to students. There was no such thing for you—every person is different, so how could one even explain another’s learning process? 

You dropped out on your second semester, leaving in the middle of a particularly boring and arduous English Grammar class, heading directly to the parking lot where you had left your car. You drove all the way to Chris’ apartment, which he shared with two other students. He wasn’t home, but one of his roommates, Changbin, informed you he should be back soon and let you in. 

Chris was there for you. It made you feel inadequate. You were always somehow in need of him or of something, but him most often. You were constantly in his debt.

He soothed your tears and promised you that your parents wouldn’t hate you if you dropped out, but he suggested thinking about another major. “There’s still time,” he said. He often said that.

You got a job at a coffee shop and worked there the rest of the year while weighing your options. You visited a lot of places—parks, various attractions, art museums. The museums were your favorites—there was no museum in Stormhaven, obviously, so to have several options to choose from now was quite the upgrade. You spent countless hours wandering in galleries, observing, learning, feeding your soul, after which you went to the library and gathered some books related to whatever you had just seen. Chris joined you sometimes, but it was really just to be with you and you knew it. He didn’t hate art, it just wasn’t for him. It didn't reach his soul like it did yours. You went to concerts with him too, which he liked a lot more. 

He suggested you try applying into art history for next year, and of course you would love that. Only, you were the first of your family to go to college, and you knew that your very practical parents, aunts and uncles would find an art history major rather pointless. An absolute waste of time. Chris insisted though—he went as far as mentioning it during winter break when both of your families sat to share a generous Christmas dinner. As expected, the response was underwhelming.

But what are you gonna do after? There can’t be enough jobs. 

Can’t you read and learn all that stuff in books or on the internet? What’s the point?

Are you sure? Or are you going to drop out again because it turned out it wasn’t for you?

You couldn’t hold it against them. Your family. They weren’t even wrong. 

You took more shifts at the coffee shop, and in the summer you returned home to work at your parents’ general shop. Chris came to spend some time home too, and it was good to be back there together. He was doing great in business school and you were going nowhere though, so as days passed, your mood darkened. He didn’t let you close yourself off, making you tell him the things that were on your mind just to prove you wrong.

“What do you mean, not enough? I loved you before you went to university, so I’ll love you regardless. So don’t say that. I forbid you.”

You stopped saying it, you just didn’t stop thinking it.

The year after, you moved in with Chris and his two roommates. The plan was to find a place for you two but to be together in the meantime. You didn’t mind, really—Jisung and Changbin were good guys, and Jisung told you about a job opening at the bookstore he worked at. You liked this job a lot. You visited all the museums in this new city, too. 

For your birthday, Ji and Changbin even got you an art book. It was a long essay on one painting in particular, an oil painting titled Loss. The painting depicts a lone woman sitting on a wooden chair in a neutral-colored room, almost reminiscent of a Vermeer, but with bolder colors. The room appears empty except for the corner of a bed on the right, and a window on the wall near which the woman sits. She is looking at the ground, but others say she is looking at her hands which are intertwined, holding nothing. The true direction of her gaze is disputed, but her expression is intricate, complex, unreadable. Depending on the viewer’s mood, she sometimes looks simply pensive. Most of the time she appears deeply sorrowful, almost desperate. To some, she shows no emotion. Thing is—art historians cannot agree. Everyone is right. Everyone is wrong.

The true magic of the painting resides in the sunset filtering through the window—it illuminates the room intricately, the shadows created by it adding to the mystery around the woman's expression. The light is accurate in a way that makes it look so real, yet more beautiful than reality. Its painter produced less than fifteen paintings and is yet considered a pioneer solely based on Loss. 

One of the most fascinating things about Loss is that it is… lost. It was stolen in the 90s while it was transported to a museum in New York, where it was meant to be temporarily exposed for a special exhibition. Nobody knows who did it or where it went, or if it still exists even. 

The book mentioned this and so much more, like how the descendants of the painter had been the primary suspects in the case, based on the fact that they had requested a few times that the painting be given back to them. There had been lawful contracts signed though, yielding it to an art society, binding Loss to museum collections for yet another hundred years at least. Since it was an ongoing case, however, details couldn’t be made public. 

You had never seen it in person—and you never would, obviously—but Loss had become your favorite painting. You didn’t need to describe with words the emotions inhabiting her, the woman on it, you just knew you shared them. What you didn’t know, however, was that you would share them even more someday.

Seeing how interested in it you were, Chris took you on a trip for your two-year anniversary—a museum in Seoul was in possession of three paintings by the same artist and one in Japan had two. You visited both locations and he stayed with you as you stood before the canvases, all of them saturated with light. One of them was a lake, as still as a mirror, on which the sunrise reflected so beautifully you shed a few tears. 

At the very end of the trip, Chris took you on an evening walk around a vast park. That’s when he got on one knee and asked you to marry him. He did it in a way that was so proper, so cliché, that it made you laugh and cry at once. You said yes, of course you said yes. It made sense, didn’t it? Growing up together, growing closer. Falling in love and not even feeling it, just waking up one morning and realizing it’s always been there.

You and Chris made love all night in your hotel room, your bodies close and warm and beautiful. He fucked you hard, desperately, confessing how he had been in love with you since childhood. You had long conversations between rounds as you recovered. “Do you ever regret hurting Liam like that?” you asked him, your head resting on his stomach. Many years had gone by since the event, yet neither of you had forgotten it. 

Chris pulled you up so he could look into your eyes. “No,” he said. “I only regret not going after you earlier. I guess I was hurt that you wanted to be with him and not with me. In retrospect, it was stupid. I should have confessed my feelings as soon as I became aware of them. I should have followed you upstairs.”

You kissed him then, deeply, slowly, your heart feeling like it might burst. You found something rather poetic about all of it, and also fair. It was your hidden love that had pushed you in Liam’s arms, and Chris’ repressed feelings also had played their part. You wanted to forget that night and yet you could not, as though something deeply important had happened, important enough that it was still on your mind tonight, merely a few hours after your boyfriend proposed to you, as you climbed onto him to straddle him, never breaking the kiss, his cock growing hard under you, for you. 

It was as though that night had sealed something, putting both Chris and you on a path, and neither of you knew what the destination was. You didn’t mind going in blindly, not if he was by your side. He had always been by your side anyway, and you couldn’t imagine your life without him.

It felt easy. 

Too easy. 

The wedding took place the summer after Chris graduated. Half of the campground had been reserved for it. Friends and family alike came together to celebrate this union that apparently more than half the town had seen coming anyway. It was a beautiful wedding, underneath a blue sky and then the stars. The air smelled like the freshly grown leafage and the soft breeze carried the scent of the ocean, too. You danced and laughed all night, catching up with former high school friends, people you hadn’t seen in so long, introducing them to your and Chris’ new friends. Jisung’s speech was particularly popular—both very funny and moving, it was clear he had spent a lot of time writing it.

Some time between very late and early morning, you made your way with Chris to the small but cozy cabin you had rented for the occasion. Both of you sat in silence at the kitchen table in your wedding attire to drink some water and eat a few snacks. Chris glanced at you with a knowing smile, reaching for your hand over the table. You smiled at him, too. 

You showered together after slowly undressing each other, and you knew that you would never forget your wedding night. You sucked his cock in the shower and he gently played with your clit, kissing and nibbling at your neck, calling you sweet things. You started fucking on the bathroom counter then moved onto the bed where Chris ate your pussy until you came, and then he fucked you. And when he came, you kept fucking him until he got hard again. You would never forget this and you knew it. That night, you felt loved and desired. You knew it was much like a drug—those were feelings one gets easily addicted to. But you didn’t care. You felt more beautiful, more important then than you ever had. 

When both of you collapsed, spent, satiated, panting, Chris held you in his arms as he so often did, and yet you never grew tired of it. He kissed the top of your head. “Let’s stay here,” he told you.

“Good news then, we rented it for a week, you pointed out with a chuckle.

“No, I mean Stormhaven.” He shook his head. “We don’t have to if you’d rather go back to the city, but it feels at home here, with you.”

You felt the same. So you stayed.

You bought a house in the northern part of town, in the same neighborhood you two had been raised in. As the procedures took place, Chris and you also pondered over the careers you may or may not want. The city’s hardware store was for sale—you could take up a bigger loan and make it yours, you and him. Then Chris’ parents mentioned they were thinking about retiring, and now that their son was back in town, they would be more at peace to do so. 

So, instead, they gave the campground to both of you. That year, your parents decided to sell you the general store too, and for a very low price. They even sold their house and bought an RV with the objective of being on the road and seeing as many things as they could. 

Those years were good ones. Even though you feared things would slow down with Chris, they didn’t. Business was good, life was even better. One night, as you two were getting into bed, Chris watched you as you opened a new box of birth control pills. He took it out of your hands, looked at you, and asked, “Do you still want to have a baby with me someday?”

You thought about it for a few seconds. You had discussed this prior to the wedding, of course. The conclusion had been that you weren’t sure you could be a good mother, so you couldn’t be sure you wanted to be one. Chris understood, but couldn’t see how you would be a bad parent. He wanted kids, and this was something you knew before even dating him. 

Here’s one of the ugliest truths in life—sometimes, you want something. Other times, you want to want something. The two are very different concepts except the human mind, when driven by the heart, is completely unable to distinguish them. It is an excessively shameful thing to admit to it.

You didn’t know at the time. What you wanted and what you didn’t want. It sounded nice, idyllic even, the idea of it—raising a child with Chris, your high school sweetheart, in this house that you made your home in, in the town that saw both of you grow up. It felt right, like life coming full circle, except grander than before.

You didn’t know at the time. You only knew that you loved Christopher more than anything, and that if you were going to have a baby with somebody, it would be him. 

You didn’t take your birth control that night. 

A poet might say that one can only see light if there is darkness. And he would be right, but you would also tell him to fuck right off.

Your mother died when you were six months pregnant. A hidden heart condition. She died in her sleep—your father found her in the morning when he woke up. It traumatized him. 

One day many months prior to that, you found out you couldn’t stomach onions anymore. In fact, the scent of them gave you nausea. It was then that you realized you hadn’t had a proper period in a while. When you mentioned it to Chris, he took your hand and guided you toward the car. “Do you want to buy the test here or in Blue Harbor, like the good old times?” His smile was playful, but a little nervous. Truth be told, if you were indeed pregnant, you didn’t want anyone to know yet, so you made your way to Blue Harbor’s mall, just like you had years ago.

The mall had changed a little but you found a drug store, and Chris insisted he would go get the tests. But you needed other items so you went in anyway. 

You saw Liam as you were shopping for shampoo. He was wearing the store’s uniform. It looked like he was a manager of some sort, by the way he was talking to the girl behind the cash register. You froze, your breath and heartbeat coming to a halt. For some reason, you remembered him with a bloody face. He looked very normal that day. A little thicker than he used to be, just like the rest of you. 

He saw you, too, and color drained from his face. He seemed stuck between wanting to go see you and running away. 

You waited for the pain to hit. You waited for tears, even—you had cried so much after the abortion that you assumed you were scarred for life. But you felt nothing, which almost frightened you. You ought to feel something, right?

You took one step toward the cash register, then another. It wasn’t to go speak to Liam. It was to be there when Chris would go and pay for his purchases. 

Liam saw Chris and actually recoiled. Chris stopped in his tracks, speechless, getting visibly pissed off. But you didn’t want him to be angry. You didn’t want a scene to take place. You wanted the memory of Liam to have as little weight as possible in your life.

You took a deep breath. “Let’s hurry,” you said to Chris. “I’m getting tired.” It wasn’t even true.

Chris blinked, staring at you for a few seconds before putting three pregnancy tests on the counter. You added some toothpaste and shampoo, pretending Liam wasn’t there while the other employee rang your items. 

You made sure to flash your wedding ring and took Chris’ hand in yours. It felt good to make sure Liam saw it. So he would know you carried no parts of him with you. So he would know he didn’t really matter, not in your life, and not in Chris’. 

You spoke very little on the way home. You kept your gaze on the horizon, processing everything. You knew the tests would come out positive. You could feel it within you, this life that was growing. It had a weight to it, light for now, but still very much there. You just knew it. 

You peed on a stick. Then another, and both were positive. You discarded the third test, and Chris cried with you. Before that day, you thought you knew what unconditional love was, but you had been wrong. This—this beautiful burden, this miracle inside you, that was as unconditional as anything could be. 

The shock of losing your mother was so great that it sent you to the hospital, and you were scared to lose your baby, too. Your little girl, who you loved so much already, who already meant the world to you. Chris and you hadn’t been able to find a good enough name yet but that wasn’t important. She was healthy, the doctors assured you of it—it was you who was in distress, and you needed to get a grip before it affected your unborn child. 

None of it was easy. The funeral, then the burial. Supporting your father through it was the worst, though.

But Chris was there for you. He always was. 

He was the perfect husband, the perfect friend, and he would be the perfect father. You could feel it in your bones. There was no way in hell you deserved him and yet he remained by your side. He moved his home office to the basement and painted the upstairs room in pretty shades of green, applying a leaf-patterned wallpaper on one of the walls, turning the room into the loveliest of nurseries. Jisung and Changbin came to help with it, and having them in the house helped you a lot. Your father was there too. The house was too full but sometimes it’s how things have to be. Or else, aloneness would be forced upon you. 

You woke up in the middle of one night with your whole lower body feeling like it was being split in two—it was then that you realized you were just about to give birth. You panicked and yet Chris remained calm. He grabbed the bag he had packed for you and he drove you to the hospital, talking you through the few contractions that overtook you, not blinking an eye at your nails digging into his skin as you held onto him. When it got a little worse, he realized that none of what he was saying helped, so he made you talk. 

He asked you about art. 

You hadn’t been in a museum in entirely too long, but you kept your books and the memories of all of it in your heart. Chris asked if you picked up an interest in a particular art movement these days. He asked you if you had discovered a piece of art that you especially liked recently. You told him that while you hadn’t discovered anything, you had read an interesting article about Artemisia Gentileschi’s most iconic work—Judith Slaying Holofernes. Explaining to Chris the analysis of the art historian you had read helped you get through the worst of the contractions so far.

It also led both of you to agree that your baby’s name would be Judith. 

As you got into Blue Harbor, it felt, a little, like a fire was catching inside you and like it was trying to exit between your legs. 

You begged Chris to drive faster, but it was winter and he didn’t want to risk anything on the slippery road. 

So he asked you to talk to him about your favorite painting. 

Loss. 

Few things were known about this painting. It had been painted in Italy by a man who came from Asia to study Venetian art, but also visited France, the Netherlands, England, and more. He brought with him his wife—the woman in the painting, or so the stories said. They had a son, and soon after, a daughter. 

The daughter became ill, and she died. 

Maybe it was fate, or something much darker, but it was as you remembered the woman’s sorrowful gaze that you realized something was wrong. Chris assured you it was just the contractions but you knew it wasn’t. You could feel it in your bones.

You could feel it creep in, approaching, lurking—aloneness. 

They proceeded to an emergency C-section but it wasn’t enough to save Judith. She had been dead inside you already, they said. They said it wasn’t your fault. 

Forced upon you. Aloneness. 

Loss.

You never really get over it. Loss.

Some voids cannot be filled, they are meant to remain wastelands, barren, contaminated. 

Judith was that to you. And to Christopher. 

You’d swear he fell out of love for you the moment he saw his daughter’s tiny lifeless body being pulled from inside you. For the first time in your whole entire life, he couldn’t be there for you. You couldn’t even be there for him either. It was the beginning of the end, only, you didn’t want to let go.

You had dreams, terrible ones. In some, Judith was alive and well, in which case it made waking up the most difficult thing. In other nightmares, though, you were giving birth to her and she wasn’t much more than blood and flesh pouring from between your legs, yet you loved her nonetheless. 

One night, you dreamt that Liam came into the general store while you worked and stabbed your pregnant belly.

You went to therapy—separately, then together. It did nothing. Some voids cannot be filled. You both made efforts to appear happy, maybe in the hopes of faking it until you made it. Chris took you on dates, and you took him on dates. You hired a handful of employees for the store and the campground so that you’d have more time, but in the end, that also did nothing. All it did was give you more time to be sad at home instead of being sad at work.

Chris had it worse than you, or maybe he just couldn’t hide it as well as you. He ate very little and slept even less. He went on long hikes and usually came back after dusk smelling like sweat and like the forest. You’d ask where he went, if he had a good hike. He’d give you responses but nothing else. 

One day he didn’t come home at all, and his phone went straight to voicemail. You tried to rationalize it, to remind yourself that most trails didn’t have great coverage anyway, and that he knew his way around the forest. You didn’t sleep that night. You couldn’t sleep. When you heard the front door at four in the morning, you flipped your pillow so that he wouldn’t be able to feel how damp it was. You wiped the tears off your cheeks and buried your face under the covers. Chris didn’t stop by the bedroom—just a minute later, he was in the shower.

You missed him. And it felt wrong to miss someone whose scent permeated the bedsheets you lay on. You were losing him, too, and you knew it because aloneness was drowning you even when he was standing right next to you.

That night, you joined Chris in the bathroom. You sat on the counter, observing him. Condensation was gradually covering the glass of the shower but you saw him in a different light—skinnier, with bruises here and there, acquired on his long hikes, no doubt. He saw you but he didn’t acknowledge you.

There were thoughts weighing you down, and you knew that speaking them out loud wouldn’t help, but you had to anyway.

“Chris, I think it would be easier for you if you admitted to yourself, and maybe even to me, that you hate me.”

He turned to you then, water rolling down his shoulders. “I don’t hate you. I’m just sad. My baby is dead. Can’t I be sad?”

“You can be sad, of course.”  You stood, making your way toward the shower, sliding the door open. You would never not be moved by him, his naked body. You felt a tumble in your belly. “But you also resent me.” 

He had the grace not to deny it this time. He averted his gaze. “I don’t want to. I know it’s not your fault. I’m sick in the head.” 

You thought it must feel somewhat the same to be stabbed in the chest. Not even in the heart, no—immediate death would be merciful compared to this. Instead, Chris had pushed a serrated blade just two inches away from the organ, sparing you, hurting you more. 

“Maybe it’s my fault. Maybe it is.” Some truths are meant to remain unspoken, but you loved Chris enough to believe he deserved to know it anyway. “I wasn’t sure at first. That I wanted a baby. Up until the moment I saw the little + sign on the first pregnancy test, I wasn't really sure I wanted to be a mother. I just wanted to be with you.” You gulped, swallowing your tears. “All these years, I felt like I should have kept that first baby. I don’t know why, it just felt like it. Mind you, I didn’t feel that before the abortion, only sometime after. Almost like I knew it would come back and haunt me somehow. Well, it did. Life punished me.”

Chris took a step toward you, cupping your face in his warm, damp hand. Water rolled down your neck and onto the t-shirt you slept in. “That’s not how it works. You didn’t manifest Judith into a stillborn.” He lowered his face close to yours, kissing you, kissing you like he meant it. 

He pulled you into the shower, kissing you deeper, and you wrapped your arms around his neck. “I love you,” Chris said, pulling your shirt off you. And you knew he did. But he also resented you. The two weren’t mutually exclusive. 

He pinned you to the wall and kissed you, guiding himself at your entrance. You felt him grow hard inside your cunt as he fucked his despair into you. “Fuck me like you hate me,” you begged him. “I deserve it.” 

He pulled away at that, only to wrap your legs around his waist, picking you up. He carried you to your bed, leaving a trail of soapy water behind. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, burying himself inside you again. 

He fucked you hard, harder than he ever had, holding you by your throat or sometimes by a fist in your hair. He fucked you from behind, then flipped you over to look into your eyes as he pounded into your soaked pussy. You hadn’t known a life without Christopher and without his love and his comfort. You wondered how you would keep existing without it. You wondered if you would be able to live without managing to pay off your debt to him. Even as he spilled himself into you, filling you with his sorrow, you wondered how you would cope. 

Even with Chris toppling over you, his weight on your body, his cock softening in your cunt, you felt alone.

Jisung turned to the rest of the room. “Does anyone want more cake?” 

A few hands shot upright, accompanied by enthusiastic statements. The ghost of a smile appeared on your lips as Jisung began his distribution of dessert. This was how you liked your house best—when it was crowded with people you loved. On other days, it felt empty, bleak, too quiet. 

Next to you, Chris shifted his weight on his seat, glancing at you. You stared back at your husband as he forced a smile on his lips. 

You leaned toward him, a frown on your brow. “Are you tired?”

He wrapped an arm around your shoulders, almost out of habit, and pulled you closer. “I’m just drunk,” he whispered into your ear, eliciting a faint chuckle from you. “Are you tired?”

You were tired, but then you had been tired for years, it felt like. You simply shook your head, knowing it was good for Chris to see people—you didn’t want him to put an end to the festivities on your behalf. Besides, they were celebrating your birthday, so you would feel bad to throw people out.

You watched as Jisung went around the room with the cheesecake leftovers. Chris kept his arm around your shoulders and you let it comfort you a little, even though he didn’t really mean it. It was muscle memory. 

Those who didn’t grab cheesecake were now pouring more wine into their glasses—you handed yours to Arina—Jisung’s fiancée—and she filled it again, and Chris’ too. 

“I heard on the radio that they forecast a particularly sunny summer,” Felix said, speaking to you and Chris specifically, although most guests were also paying attention. “I reckon business will be good for you guys this year.”

“I hope so,” Chris responded, squeezing your shoulder as a public testimony that he still gave somewhat of a shit about you. Maybe this was why you liked your house best when your friends were here—because your husband had to pretend he still loved you when people were around. “We’re thinking of hiring a couple more people, actually.”

“That’s awesome!” Felix flashed a bright smile at you. “I’ll have to try and make time to come visit. It’s been so long since I actually walked around the campground.” 

You knew he meant well, and you knew Felix wasn’t even lying—he had been friends with Chris in high school and he knew the area well despite having moved away a while ago. You knew that at this moment, Felix genuinely wanted to come again later, during the peak of summer season, to see the area at its most beautiful and lively, but you also knew he wouldn’t. Because that’s just how life was. Difficult. He would be busy somehow. And when he wouldn’t be busy, he would want to relax. Or go on a date. Or watch a movie. And you didn’t hold it against him. It had been at least a year since you went over to his place anyway.

“Man, you really should!” Chris nodded, raising his glass at Felix. We expanded a little, to accommodate for trout season. It was too crowded last year.” 

You were about to comment how it was a good problem to have, only you saw at the other end of the table Changbin and his girlfriend, Naomi, exchange a long, quiet stare, then turning to Arina and looking at her wine glass, which was still full. 

Something stirred within you. You knew what was about to happen, and you knew it was probably within your power to stop it. Only, you lacked the strength to do so, and words eluded you anyway. Or will, perhaps.

“Say, Ari,” Naomi told her friend with a mischievous smile on her face. She spoke at low volume, not trying to overpower the main conversation, in which Chris was telling Felix about the sudden and unexpected rise in trout population in the area. “I don’t think I saw you take a single sip of that wine.”

You knew for sure then, by the way color drained from Arina’s face before she turned crimson in half a second, and from the way Jisung almost dropped the cake as he went to put it back on the countertop. 

You couldn’t tell what hurt most—the way Arina’s gaze looked for you but how she dared not look you in the eyes in your own home, or the fact that she was pregnant at all.

Naomi reached over her boyfriend to give Arina the gentlest nudge. “Girl!” 

Changbin took Naomi’s hand in his, pulling it under the table quickly, pushing his own plate of cheesecake in front of her. “Want some? I don’t think I can eat all of it after all.” 

Not saying it was worse. Jisung stared at Arina, then at Changbin, avoiding your eyes at all costs. Meanwhile, the discussion between Chris and Felix was coming to an end as they realized that something was happening around the table. 

You couldn’t hold it against Naomi—she was the latest addition to your friend group, after all, and she didn’t know. Or didn’t know a lot about it all anyway. And even if she did know... You still couldn’t hold it against her. There was no reason for the rest of the world to remain stuck in the past the way you and Chris were. There was no reason for the rest of the world not to be happy at such a joyful prospect. 

Chris let his arm fall back, freeing your shoulders. You felt very alone then.

You knew it had to be you. It had to be you who said something or else the situation would get even more embarrassing and awkward. There had been many moments like this in the past few years, so you knew your way around them by now, no matter how unpleasant. It had to be you. It always had to be you.

“Ari, is it true then?” The thing with sorrow is it often turns people into excellent liars. You didn’t like this about you, but you could be very convincing when you had to be. You looked very happy when you needed to. “Is it really true?”

A timid smile reappeared on your friend’s lips. After a quick glance at Jisung, she nodded gently. “Yes, it’s true.”

As the table erupted in congratulations and a full-on interrogation—How long have you known? How far along are you? Oh my god can it really be true?—you plastered a smile on your face and remained in your seat. There was something else about lying—you had to learn not to overdo it. Proper dosage was essential to how believable you were. You couldn’t jump in place and clap and sing because your friend was pregnant, then people would look at you weird. They would know you’re faking it. They might even deduce that you have been faking it for a long time.

The ghost of Chris on the chair next to you disappeared when he pulled away, as expected. You recognized your own rehearsed smile on his face. 

“I really didn’t want…” Arina began, then stopped mid-sentence as she was searching for her words. Or rather, as she was thinking of the least hurtful way to remind you that your baby had died inside you. “We really didn’t want to crash the party with the news. We wanted to wait.” This, she said to you. 

“It’s alright,” you lied. It was not alright. You hadn’t had a happy birthday in a long time but this one had just turned into a genuine nightmare, as you felt yourself fall into a pit of darkness. Or rather like you were becoming one. “I’m very, very happy for you.”

“It’s such great news,” Chris chimed in. “Let us know if there’s anything we can do, yeah?”

But of course, they wouldn’t want you to come near their beloved child, and you understood that. Because you were cursed. 

The news indeed put an end to the party, which you knew was justified by people feeling awkward. Or maybe they just didn’t want to see the color of your grief. Arina was the last to leave—she stood with you in the doorway while Jisung and the other guys were chatting by their cars. She spared you from another apology but she held you in her arms. “It’ll be your turn soon,” she assured. People said those things sometimes, and it was to alleviate their guilt.

Chris joined you in the kitchen as you were putting empty cups in a trash bag. He grabbed some plates and began rinsing them in the sink.

You knew you had to say something. You knew it had to be you, no matter how unpleasant. 

“The cake was really good,” you commented. 

“Right?” Chris put a little too much enthusiasm into his response. “Mrs. Allen makes the best cakes.” Mrs. Allen owned the only bakery in this part of the city, and everybody feared the day she would decide to retire. Most of her income came from locals purchasing her goods for special occasions or simply because they craved something sweet.

“She does,” you agreed. “Thank you for the birthday party, and for my gift.” He had offered you a hydroponic garden system, something you had mentioned being interested in but weren’t quite sure it would fit in your kitchen. 

“No problem.” He spoke at low volume, now loading the dishwasher. It seemed, for a few instants, as though he was about to say something meaningful. But he finished clearing the countertops. “How about I run you a bath?” 

You accepted his offer, half hoping for something that couldn’t be true, which was that he would join you. Except he wouldn’t and you were well aware of that fact. Most nights, he pretended to fall asleep on the couch so he wouldn’t join you in the bed.

Last week, he saw the notification on your phone. According to your calendar, your peak fertility window begins now and will end in twenty-four hours. You still kept the fertility app. Maybe out of habit, but certainly not out of hope—Christopher had never truly said he wanted another child. Maybe it didn’t really matter either. You hadn’t gone back on birth control and there had been absolutely no pregnancy scares. Not that you had been particularly active… Except that now, you were certain Chris wouldn’t touch you for a long time. Because last week, after seeing the notification, Chris kissed you like he hadn’t kissed you in a while. He lay you in bed and undressed you and touched you and you touched him, too. But he couldn’t make love to you. He tried.

He really tried. Until tears were staining his cheeks. You took him in your mouth. You got on top, hoping he would grow hard inside you. But he didn’t. He apologized profusely but he didn’t need to. You had learned to discern the hints life left behind. Some things were meant to be and some weren’t. 

How unfair though. How unfair was it that you and Chris weren’t actually meant to be if you loved him this much? If you had loved him all of your life?

He did run you a bath, with all of your favorite things in it—jasmine oil, candles all around, piano music playing from a small speaker. It didn’t stop you from hearing him locking himself in what had been the nursery. In what still was the nursery—absolutely nothing had changed. Not one thing had been moved. The door just remained closed. Always. 

Could you have been wrong all this time? What if it wasn’t Chris who was meant for you, but aloneness? What if the withering of your heart was your own fault? After all, Judith had been inside you when her heart stopped beating. It had nothing to do with Chris, or with anybody else. Still, it was all he saw in you—the place in which his daughter died.

He was right. It was all that you were. A coffin, a graveyard, a tomb. All at once. And it was all that you would ever be, for as long as you would live.

A crackling sound coming from the walkie-talkie on the counter made you jump. You inhaled sharply, looking away from the laptop screen to offer an apologetic smile to the two clients who were checking into the campground. 

You weren’t supposed to be here today—usually, on Fridays, you operated the general shop, and Chris the campground. Mostly because even though they were now under the same business, you were both more used to those specific establishments, having been raised into them. Only, it was the campground’s big summer opening and Chris was overseeing the event. There would be a concert tonight, by a local band who played covers, and games and other activities were offered during the day. 

Since food was involved, it was less likely for people to stop by the general shop tonight—so you left it in your most trusted employee’s hands, knowing Jeongin would be more than able to handle himself there. He was probably going to sell sunscreen and hats all day—it was stunningly sunny. 

You grabbed the walkie-talkie, walking a few footsteps away to listen carefully. It was Jeongin’s voice that came in.

“Boss,” he said, and you still didn’t know who he was talking to because he called both Chris and you like that. “There’s someone here asking if we sell paint, and I’ve just been looking everywhere and…” 

A faint click followed Jeongin’s question, indicating that Chris had joined the conversation. “Paint?” he repeated. He could barely be heard over the music playing over there. “Paint?” 

You returned to the clients who had finished filling out their security forms while the other two chatted over the radio. You handed them their keycards to unlock the gate and various other spots on the site. You didn’t need to go too in-depth with them—it was the third summer they came here. “Thank you for choosing us again,” you told them with a smile. “If you have issues or an emergency, do call the number at the bottom of the map and someone will come to you.” 

The couple—a man and a woman in their 70s—thanked you warmly and returned to their RV outside. They had rented a space for two weeks. They reminded you a little of your parents. Had they looked this happy when they were on their trips? 

The debate over the walkie-talkie distracted you before you could tear up, even though you missed your mother terribly. 

“Not spray paint, boss,” Jeongin insisted. “Like, just paint.” You heard a voice speaking inaudibly behind him, and then the young man added, “Not wall paint or spray paint. Paint for art. Watercolor?” He said the last word as though he was only repeating it while being wildly unsure about it. 

Everything clicked into place then as you finally understood what they wanted. You grabbed your radio and joined the discussion again. “I didn’t have enough time to stock up the kids’ section,” you explained. It was a mistake on your part, caused by your sleep troubles as of late. After all, it wasn’t uncommon at all for parents to grab a few toys for their children before entering the campground. “Most of the stuff is still in boxes in the back store. I know where it is, I can guide you.”

Jeongin’s line cut abruptly—he had let go of his Talk button. “Jeongin?” Chris asked.

He came back almost immediately. “He says no, boss. He’s asking if we sell real watercolor, not children's stuff.” 

You suppressed a laugh and heard your husband do the same. While nobody in the area understood the importance of art more than you, you couldn’t help but find it humorous that someone would stop at a very rustic-looking general store on the side of the road of a small city to ask for legitimate art supplies. 

You looked at the beautiful landscape out the window—the river, the shore, and behind it all, the mountains. As pretty as a painting. 

“Please apologize on our behalf,” you told Jeongin. “We don’t carry art supplies of the sort. Offer them a discount on their purchase.” 

“Thanks, boss.” And Jeongin tuned out for good, leaving you and Chris alone on the line.

You let a few seconds pass. “How are things over there?” you asked, either to make conversation or because you desperately wanted your husband to speak to you. About anything. Anything at all.

“Pretty good actually. They’re loving the lemonade.” You two had made many batches of it early this morning. Quietly. In your kitchen. Squeezing lemons and then weighing sugar and making raspberry syrup, for the pink lemonade. Alone. “How are you holding up in there?” 

“It’s fine. Every time I’m here, it reminds me of those mornings my mom would have your mom babysit me, and she’d drag me here and put me to work.” The Park Office had been renovated since then, but it smelled the same as it used to. Like cedar and pine, with faint salt undertones. “Should we start carrying art supplies?”

“Man, I don’t know.” Chris laughed and he sounded like he meant it. It made a burst of light appear in your chest, even if it was only temporarily. “Oh, I gotta go. We need ice.”

“Let me know if I can do anything.” But Chris was already gone. 

Your life had reached a point where you doubted that any ice was actually needed. You imagined Chris just wanted to find a good enough reason not to speak to you, just you. He fared well enough—and so did you—in the presence of others, as though they motivated him to pretend better. The first night he didn’t come back home, you thought he was cheating on you. In the end, the sound of his shower woke you up at six in the morning. When you asked him where he’d been, he said he worked on some repairs at the camping ground.

It happened more and more often. Then some of his clothes disappeared from inside his drawers. It happened over weeks, so it gave you time to prepare. To form some sort of shell to brace yourself from the impact of it. By then, he rarely slept in your bed anymore, preferring the guest room or the living room. But when he did, you barely recognized your husband. It did not feel like him, that person under the sheets. 

During your sleepless nights, you pondered over it a lot. You were well aware that Chris hadn’t brought up divorce because it would feel like a failure for him. Like he had failed this marriage and you. You knew there was also the whole issue of the Riverside Campground and Riverside General Store, now become one. The legal problems that would surface during the divorce would be awful, and you knew it. Neither of you had felt the need to get a prenup or anything of the sort. 

Honest to god, you had thought you would be with Chris for the rest of your life. And maybe he had felt the same, and it was why he was so reluctant to leave you. 

Sometimes, you wanted to tell him that it was okay. If he was seeing another woman. He wasn’t going to keep fucking you, was he? Not when you were a graveyard. You couldn’t force him to love you either. He had stopped loving you a long time ago—it just took him a while to come to the realization. You wanted to hate him. To resent him. But all that you could do about Chris was love him, no matter how broken, how misaligned that love had become.

There was this unspoken agreement that at work and around your friends, you made it look like everything was okay. You hadn’t told a soul about your marital problems and you assumed Chris probably hadn’t either. 

Every day you woke up with the clear intention to sit down with Chris and to talk. To make him say that this—all of this—made no fucking sense. That you had to get a divorce, no matter how cumbersome it would be. Nothing could be worse than this anyway. 

And as the coward that you were, every day, you found ways to avoid that conversation. 

A car coming down the road caught your attention, pulling you out of your deep thoughts. The darkness lingered within you, but you appreciated every occasion to be distracted from it. Even work.

The car—a black Jeep Patriot that looked like a rental—stopped at the designated parking space for check-ins. Noticing that, you made sure that none of the tears that had tickled your eyes had messed with your mascara. Unfortunately, it was a little smudged in one place, but you managed to mostly fix it just in time to welcome the customer.

A man that you supposed was in his mid-20s  entered the park office looking a little confused yet resolute. He had hiking attire—dark green cargo pants, a generic t-shirt, and a lightweight jacket. Holding his phone and often looking at it, he made his way to the counter slowly. 

“Hello,” you said before he had even reached you, prompting him to look up. He was, by all standards, pretty, with feline-like eyes and gentle traits. “Will you be checking in with us today, sir?” 

He responded to your smile with a polite one. “Yes. I made the reservation a while ago. Under Lee, Minho.” 

You typed his name into the laptop, quickly pulling up his reservation file. You raised your eyebrows as you looked at it—it was the first time you saw it really, Chris was the one who took care of this stuff usually.

“I have it here,” you told him, double-checking to make sure you had read everything right. “You made an extended stay reservation for two adults in one of our RVs?” 

The campground welcomed RVs on one side and tents on the other, also offering to rent either installation for those who needed them. Renting a fully equipped, luxury RV was by far the most expensive booking option you sold, and he had requested it until the end of the season. From the first day to the very last. 

“Yes, that’s me.” His smile became a little more comfortable, and a little warmer, too. “You seem surprised.”

“Oh, I’m just not used to it—usually, it’s the cabins on the other side of the rivers that get this sort of clientele.” 

You took the credit card—black—that he handed you without you having to ask. You actually had nothing against Pineview Cabins. People who wanted a cabin wanted a cabin, and those who wanted something else came to you. Besides, the owners were a mother and her son, and they were lovely.

“Cabins are for tourists,” Lee Minho said jokingly.

You finished entering his information in the system and gave the card back, finding it a bit easier to smile in his laid-back presence. No matter how long you had spent enduring it, you had never been very good at aloneness. 

“There is a form we require guests to fill—for security purposes,” you explained to him, sliding on the counter the form in question, secured on a clipboard. You shot a glance behind him, looking at his car through the front window, where you could see that there was someone in the passenger seat. “Both of you will have to fill one,” you added, pulling out a second clipboard. “I can go and hand this one to them while you fill yours if you’d like.”

The man shook his head, the corner of his lips curving up. “Nah. Let me call him. He can sulk about paint sometime later.” 

It clicked into place then—this man, and whoever was in his car, had been the ones who, just moments ago, were at the general shop asking for watercolors. 

“It was you!” You bit your lip. “I’m really sorry we couldn’t accommodate you better. I’ll—”

Minho, who had just finished typing a text on his phone, put the device back in his pocket and grabbed one of the pens to start filling out his form. “No need to apologize. I don’t know why he expected to find some legit watercolors here.” 

“Ah, artists.” You spoke in a tone that was clearly sarcastic but not offensive. 

“This one is something, for sure.”

As if on cue, the front door was opened by the man beckoned by Minho through a text and a little voice inside your head said, Yes, this one is something indeed. He was tall, holding himself straight with a perfect posture and yet in a totally nonchalant manner. Still, he was graceful. You saw it in the way he pulled the door open, in the way he took off his fancy designer sunglasses to put them on his head, in the way he adjusted his half ponytail right after. 

If Minho was dressed as though he was heading out for a three-day hike, this one, the artist, was the complete opposite. A loose white graphic tee hung on his broad shoulders. With it, he wore oversized jeans, and he even had another shirt tied around his waist, as though he had expected the weather to be cooler. A multitude of jewelry pieces adorned his body—a few silver necklaces around his dainty neck, many bracelets on his wrists, and rings, too. The ensemble screamed intentional chaos.

The more seconds passed, the closer he was to you and the counter, and you were utterly unable to take your eyes off him. Not just because he had just entered the room and it was a normal thing to look at someone who approached to check-in. But because you had never seen anybody like him before.

He was beautiful, and there was no other way to put it. His face was seemingly perfect—his big, dark eyes were scanning his surroundings as though to evaluate the potential dangers. The rounded tip of his nose complemented his cheekbones well. 

He had a pretty mouth—his lips were obscenely plush. Rosy red. Enticing. With a velvety quality to them. Skin like honey-coated satin. Hair like silk soaked in black ink. 

He was the kind of person who just oozed charisma. Effortlessly. The kind of person whose presence changes the whole vibe of the room. The kind of person everybody notices without them trying. Often, without them wishing for it at all. 

There was a point where you realized you should say something—he was just a few steps away now, close enough that Minho had turned to him. Close enough that you could smell him—he carried with him a strong yet not heavy scent reminiscent of amber and roses with woodsy and musky undertones. You took a deep breath but it wasn’t even to brace yourself to be in his presence. It was to inhale more and more of this alluring smell. It took everything in your power not to immediately ask him what his cologne was. 

“There you are. Here.” It was Minho who spoke first in the end, sliding the second clipboard and another pen toward his friend. Or brother. Or cousin.

Or boyfriend, maybe. 

You had to say something. “Hello.” Simple. Ordinary. A skeleton key of greetings. 

He briefly looked away from the clipboard to acknowledge your presence. “Hi.” 

He didn’t seem thrilled about having been called in here and you felt bad about it for some reason, even though you had been asking guests to fill out a security form for years now. 

“Sorry about this. It’s for security purposes,” you explained. 

“It’s no problem at all,” Minho assured. He was already halfway through his form. 

You gave him a quick nod. “And sorry about the watercolors, too,” you added.

At this, the handsome man reacted a bit more. He straightened up from the counter to face you. It felt, a little, like the air had been kicked out of your lungs. Being face to face, so close to him, felt like falling from a high place. 

He spoke to you softly, almost timidly, like he wasn’t sure he ought to speak at all. “The airline lost my art supplies bag and sent it to the wrong destination. I just wanted to have something while they manage to send it to me.” His voice was pleasant. Smokey and warm, it had a strangely comforting tone.

You barely understood the words he said, not because it was a difficult concept to comprehend, but because of the intonation in which he spoke as well as his pronunciation. It was so unique it demanded your whole attention. As if the placement of his lips at any given time, and the movements of his tongue as he spoke, came together as an orchestra that played an elegant symphony. 

“We actually put in the address of the campground,” Minho interrupted as if he had just remembered that detail. “I hope it’s okay? They should be sending the bag here sometime next week.”

“Or the week after,” the artist sighed, rolling his eyes before returning to his form. His handwriting was small and neat. 

“It’s not a problem at all.” It occurred to you then that you had things to get done to check them in, so you returned to your laptop to get to work. “We’ll let you know as soon as it gets here.” You bit your lip, torn over your curiosity and your pulse quickening so fast it frightened you. “Do you exclusively paint in aquarelle?” 

You reported your attention to your screen as soon as you asked the question, regretting it immediately. Like sending a risky text. Warmth spread at the back of your neck, reaching your cheeks and even your ears. Get a fucking grip.

He was handsome, yes. He was the kind of beautiful that nobody could ignore, yes. To blush a little when he looked into your eyes was one thing. But to be entranced by this stranger like this, to have your heart threatening to jump out of your chest, for your breathing to turn shallow in his presence… That was something else. 

At first, you blamed your many sleepless nights—you had a lot of accumulated fatigue, so it would be normal not to be in your right mind. Then you blamed your lingering heartache. The sorrow you carried with you anywhere you went. The wedding ring on your finger that felt like it weighed a ton while meaning so little anymore.

Then shame crept up from somewhere deep within you, tugging at your heart.

No matter how painful the state of your marriage was, you remained married. And there was nothing wrong with finding somebody else attractive, of course, but this felt different. It felt like you ought to take several steps back and internalize that no matter how hot and interesting this guy was, it wasn’t even for you to take notice of it. He painted. So what? He was insanely hot. So what? He wasn’t the first handsome dude you met during your marital life. He smelled good. Okay? He had pretty lips, but who cares?

GET A FUCKING GRIP!

You figured it was your brain trying to save you. You had known for a long time that your marriage was over and that nothing could save it. It had been such a long while, it seemed, since Chris had truly loved you. And you loved him in a desperate way, like trying to hold onto a knife not by its handle, but by its blade.

Your thought process only took about two seconds, but they felt like two very long seconds. In the end, none of this mattered—even if Chris divorced you, and even if this young god had any interest in you, which was impossible, you would still not do anything about it. If you hadn’t even been able to trust in your life-long conviction that you would grow old with Chris, then you were certainly not going to open your heart to anybody else. Ever. 

The man stared at you like he was thinking about his response before saying it. Minho was done with his form and handed it back to you. 

“He does a lot of things,” he said in the artist’s place. “I bought a painting from him. That’s how we met. It’s watercolor and oil, right?” He turned to the handsome man, who nodded.

“Yes, and encaustic paint,” he added, his voice suddenly a little smaller. “It’s made of—”

“Yes, wax. Hot wax.” You cut him off before he could finish his sentence, feeling a little bad that he felt compelled to explain everything, considering how he looked like he didn’t want to talk to you at all. He was most likely an introvert. It used to be difficult for you, too, to talk to strangers. But you became used to it through this place over the years. Or maybe in a desperate attempt not to be alone.

He stared at you with his eyebrows raised just slightly. “Do you paint, too?”

You couldn’t help a nervous laugh from escaping your lips. “God, no. I wish though. I just… appreciate.”

“Then I’ll have to show you his stuff. Brilliant.” Minho gave his companion a not-so-gentle slap on the back. 

“I’d love to,” you replied, taking the signed form from the artist. “We’ve actually been looking into buying a piece for the main lodge, where we hold some events, activities, shows, stuff like that. We did a few renovations last year, and there’s a wall that’s just so empty and bland. Maybe we—”

Two things happened at once then.

Out of habit—and because you had to as it was literally your job—you let your gaze trail down the form you were now holding. You also realized that you were overdoing it with the conversation, talking a little too quickly just to make up for the fact that you were a nervous wreck. The guy had checked in using a black card. There was about no chance for you to be able to afford anything this young god painted, right?

Then your brain processed the words it was reading.

Full name: Hwang, Hyunjin

Hwang, like Hwang Naro, the painter behind Loss, the artwork that had been fascinating you for years. And he just happened to be a painter, too. For some reason. Loss dated back to the 1850s after all, so there was no correlation to be made. Hwang Naro. Hwang Hyunjin.

Immediately, you reminded yourself that many people shared a last name in Korea after all, so it was only a minor coincidence. Painting was a common hobby, wasn’t it?

“Uh, is there a problem, Miss?” Hyunjin inquired, leaning in closer to also look at his form to double-check.

It wouldn’t have felt any different if you had been kicked in the solar plexus. His scent invaded your nostrils and then your lungs, and it was so violent that you had to hold onto the counter. When he looked up again, you noticed more details on his face. The mole under his eyes. The faint lines on his lips. The other mole on his jaw. The shape of his eyes, perfect, intricate, elegant. Their shade deep enough that you could drown in them. 

You remembered the book Jisung and Changbin had given you for your birthday once, the essay about the painting. One of the chapters contained various interviews and letters from people who had known Naro—he signed his paintings without his family name. One of the interviews had been conducted in the late 1880s, by an author who would later publish it in a journal in the early 1900s. He had spoken to Cornelia, a maid who had worked for the Hwangs during her youth while the family resided in Leiden, a small city in South Holland.

Everybody in town knew that Mr. Naro was handsome and kind. He liked to visit the botanical gardens to practice his colors and florals, and some visitors went there to watch him, too. He would sometimes carry with him small pieces of canvas and hand out sketches to children. Mr. Naro was fond of children, and he loved his only son very much, more than I have ever seen a father love anything before. The women envied his wife and the men envied him, for he was a proper gentleman and loved by all. He and his family lived modestly despite the money he made selling his paintings and giving art courses. 

He summoned me to the courtyard of the house one afternoon. He was painting the sky, which was blue and beautiful. Mr. Naro told me he freed me from my employment. When I panicked, he said, “Fret not, Cornelia, it has nothing to do with your abilities. I am most content having you under my roof.” Mr. Naro looked me in the eyes and said I should take some time to visit places and fall in love, either with the world or with a man, or a woman even. He assured me I would be welcome to return after my trip if I wished, and that if he happened to be gone by then, he would ensure the University hired me. 

He gave me money, more than I had ever seen in my life, and a bag for my travels. I refused yet he insisted, no matter how immense the gift, disproportionate to what I thought I deserved. He said my heart’s color was Alizarin Crimson, with a just drop of Naples Yellow and another of Ultramarine, all of those softened in Flemish White. As he spoke, he mixed the colors on his palette, right in front of my eyes. The final result was a gorgeous pink that reminded me of the carnations that used to grow in my grandmother’s garden. He used that pink to paint a stunning bird in the sky, shading it with black and blue, defining the feathers also with white. He gave me the painting and said, “This is your heart. Do you want to keep it caged up here?” 

I heard he had similar interactions with other maids and even students. I traveled to France where I met my husband and became a dancer. I never forgot Mr. Naro. I never forgot Mr. Naro’s eyes, so dark they were more black than brown, yet soft, gentle, and sad. I wanted to be a painter so I could accurately blend paints to recreate that color, just to see it one more time.

The painting, titled Cornelia’s Colors, was now at home at Musée d’Orsay, and you had been lucky enough to see it with your own two eyes a few years ago, during a short European trip with Christopher. It had been given to the museum by the maid-turned-dancer’s descendants. 

But it was not the intricacies of the painting that were on your mind at that moment, not even the expert blending of the colors on it. It was the shade of Hyunjin’s eyes. So dark they were more black than brown, yet soft, gentle, and sad. 

You shook your head faintly, as though chasing away the thoughts invading it.

“Did I miss something?” Hyunjin asked again, glancing at his sheet. 

“N—No, it’s all good.” And yet, by the way they were looking at you, you were very much aware that your reaction must have been noticed. For a split second, you wondered what would be weirder—if you mentioned something or if you just moved on. “It’s just, your name,” you said before you could even really think about it. “You have the same family name as the artist who painted my favorite painting. And you paint too. So I thought it was just a nice coincidence.” 

Something in Hyunjin’s already somber eyes shifted, worsening the darkness in them. His body language changed in a matter of seconds as he stood straight up again, keeping his shoulders straight. He removed the sunglasses from the top of his head, ready to put them on his nose again. 

Minho stared at him, and then at you again. “It’s not really a coincidence, is it?” he told Hyunjin.

Hyunjin rolled his eyes so faintly you almost didn’t catch it. He took a deep breath, the exhale ending with a sigh—in the dictionary, under Bored, a picture of him at that very moment could serve as a definition for the word. You felt so bad you wanted to hide under the counter like you used to when you were little. 

“Guess not,” Hyunjin said with a shrug. “He’s my great-great-grandfather.” 

Too many seconds passed before you reacted—before the information even made it to your brain. 

You were standing in the presence of Hwang Naro’s direct descendant. You were breathing the same air as him, you were looking upon his divinely sculpted face. You were hearing his voice, coated with amber and honey. 

“Oh my god,” was all you managed, whispering under your breath, a frown digging itself between your brows. “I’m so sorry, I—”

Hyunjin waved his hand dismissively. “Don’t worry about it. It’s not important.” 

Not important. Except his great-great-grandfather had been the artist behind the painting that you had always favored. The painting that had turned out to be prophetic, for you at least. 

“What are the odds though?” Minho, contrary to Hyunjin or you, seemed very enthusiastic about all of this. “I knew it was a good idea to drag you here, Hwang.”

By the look on Hyunjin’s face, you could tell he felt very differently. It triggered your brain back into place though, as you became excessively self-conscious. Of yourself. Of your reaction. You could understand why your mind latched onto any good or interesting thing it saw, because your life had become bleak and empty. Yet it was stupid to care about any of that. To this man, the painting meant nothing, and it didn’t appear that his ancestry mattered much more either. He was clearly annoyed with you anyway. 

With trembling hands, you reached for the keycard printer, collecting the two cards you had just printed. You slid them into their protective sleeves, which were attached to lanyards with the campground’s name on them. 

“Here,” you managed, also trying your best to smile. “These will give you access to everything you need—the entry gate, your RV, the laundromat, and the showers. If you lose them, just call this number here.” With that, you handed them maps of the campground, as you did with any new guest. “We’re here. Your site is right there with the other RVs.” You showed them with your index finger, but you felt your insides disintegrating into nothingness. “Just get past the gate and follow Pinecone Lane, you can’t miss it. You have a parking space at your site.”

“This place is huge,” Hyunjin commented—not to you, but to Minho. 

“Bigger than I imagined,” Minho conceded, but he was speaking to you. 

You nodded. “Yes. This is the tent camping site,” you explained. “Here is the main lodge, with the pool. This is the RV site. There’s walkable beach land all around this part too, and you can rent a boat or kayaks here.” 

“Jesus Christ, that’ll be the best summer of my fucking life,” Minho said with a sigh. “I need this vacation. I’m here to fish, I got a permit for it.”

You couldn’t shake the feeling that Minho had picked up on your unease and was trying to distract you from it. It did manage to slow your heartbeat a little. 

“Ah, fishing!” This prompted the smile on your lips to become more genuine. “Of course. Lots of fishing to be done around the estuary. I love striped bass, I haven’t had any in too long.” 

Your father used to love fishing and he would often take you with him. He would cook the bass on a fire with ingredients he gathered in the forest. Those were some of your most precious memories. You’d usually fall asleep by the fire and wake up at the back of the car as he was driving you home. These days, your father’s arthritis was preventing him from enjoying his fishing trips, so he just stopped going. And every year, you told yourself you ought to go fish by yourself, catch a bass, and cook it for him. You never found the time. Or the courage. Or the courage to find the time.

“I’ll make sure to save some for you if I catch any,” Minho promised. 

“Please don’t. Really.” You pressed your lips together, wondering what to say next. Hyunjin’s sunglasses returned before his eyes and they grabbed their card and map. “I hope you have a wonderful stay. Don’t hesitate to call or visit here, the main lodge, or the general store if you need anything.”

“Except paint,” Minho remarked with a clearly sarcastic and humorous tone, sending both you and Hyunjin into a hysterical fit of laughter. 

You laughed so hard you had to lean against the wall behind you with a hand over your mouth while Hyunjin clapped and called Minho a fucking dumbass. You hadn’t laughed this much in a long time. In fact, you couldn’t remember at all when the last time was. You wiped the tears at the corner of your eyes, waving at the two men as they walked out. Minho exited first, and Hyunjin lingered in the door frame, hesitating.

He turned to you. You couldn’t read his expression, not with the sunglasses, but his posture was more relaxed than it had been. “Just curious,” he started. “What is it? Your favorite painting?” 

Your laugh came to a halt the same way a delicate crystal glass would shatter into pieces if someone closed their fist around it. 

“It’s Loss.” You wanted to say more, but your voice remained stuck in your throat. And what would you have said anyway?

He stared at you for a few seconds and nodded slowly before leaving. 

There were still tears on your cheeks, but they no longer tasted like laughter—instead, they had the bitter yet familiar taste of aloneness.

... to be continued.

Note: I feel like I say the same thing over and over—but thank you. I could say it a million times and it wouldn't be enough. Thank you to my readers who not only put up with me, but encourage me as well and motivate me to keep trying to improve and to find my voice.

This story was, once again, extracted from the depths of my heart. It is with the utmost humility that I present it to you—when I started writing it, I did so with the intention, specifically, of not releasing it to the public. It's too personal, I told myself. And then I realized that every story I released contain other parts of my soul, and that this one was no different.

So, here it is. The ramblings of a woman who feels like she graduated at the school of Alone and earned a PhD in Loneliness.

Thank you for your support, and for your love. You guys are the best readers. You know this, right? Love y'all.

Welcome to Stormhaven 🤍

** please note that I will soon be restarting my permanent taglist from scratch as I only wish to keep active readers on them in an effort to put my time in the right places, considering the effort and love i put into what i release. by active readers i mean readers who interact at least a little with my content. i do not expect you to read every single thing i put out or to comment all the time. it's really just that there are many fully inactive/silent readers on the list! if you wish to stay on the list or be added to it, please reach out to me. ask is ideal because I can then tag your ask & return to it, but you can DM me as well! thank you for your understanding. **

taglist:

@abiaswreck ; @accalus ; @aimeexx ; @anylady-fics ; @b4kuho3 ;

@binstitsweat ; @cb97percent ; @chans1aptop ; @chartrucewhore ; @hanjingin ;

@hwan-g ; @hyuneyeon ; @hyunfruits ; @hyunjinswifeee ; @hyunniethepooh

@hyuwunjinie ; @hyyuniverse ; @iam2out ; @imseungminsgf ; @k1ra4a

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@straydhampir ; @suhomylife ; @sunlitwilderness ; @ven-fic-recs ; @yourmercibeaucoupsblog

Synopsis:

The two most influential and feared Korean Crime families, the Lobos and the Clowder's, hate each other.

They have always been, and always will be, enemies.

So when two of them meet by chance outside of the confines of their families, how can they reconcile a lifelong distrust, with their new found love?

-or-

"We're enemies."

"I'm not your enemy, Ji."

MINORS DNI ♡ Pairing: Minho x Jisung ♤ Genre: Mafia AU, Romeo x Romeo ♢ Warnings: Violence, foul language throughout, angst(?), mxm ♧ Authors Note: this is my first ever fan fiction! Feedback welcome.

♤ ♡ ♢ ♧ IN PROGRESS ♤ ♡ ♢ ♧ ♤ ♡ Lads, it's basically a novel...♢ ♧

♤ ♡ ♢ ♧ CHAPTERS ♤ ♡ ♢ ♧

♤ Chapter 1 - Parley word count <8k

♧ Chapter 2 - The DLC word count >6k

♢ Chapter3 - Broken Compass

♢ ♧ If you made it this far, thank you for your support! ♤ ♡ please consider leaving a comment, like or reblog ♤ ♡ ©2024Intrikatie ♢ ♧ Ao3 ♤ ♡

LMAO you crack me up kitty kat. I'm so happy you liked it

Play with Fire

Pairing: Hyunjin x afab!reader, Hyunjin x y/n

Summary: The follow up to Of Haircuts and Hyunjin - After his visit to District 9 Salon, Hyunjin can't stop thinking about you. He reaches out to you and ends up taking you on a date.

WC: 5.1k

SS: 3

AU: idol!Hyunjin

Genre: Smut

Content Warnings: Intended for 18+ mature audiences, MDNI! Kissing, oral sex (cunnilingus and fellatio)

Nets: @mirohs-aurora-society @neverendingdreams-net

Part 1

After he left the salon, he had stuffed the receipt into his pocket and headed to the company practice rooms. All through dance practice it felt as though that little piece of paper was burning a hole in his pocket. Thankfully he didn’t make any mistakes, but he wasn’t as focused on his dancing as he should be - all because he couldn’t stop thinking about the message. He couldn’t stop thinking about you.

Hyunjin returns to the dorm after dance practice and flops on his bed. He removes the little receipt paper from his pocket and holds it in his hand. He reads the message and then re-reads it.

In case you want to do more than look ###-###-#### Y/N.

He crumples the receipt and tosses it to the side with a sigh. He should just forget all about it, forget all about you. While he and the other members are no longer under a dating ban, strictly speaking, it is still discouraged by the company. Seeing you would just be playing with fire. He runs a hand through his hair and sighs again. Maybe a shower will help clear his thoughts.

He grabs a towel from the linen closet and pads down the hallway to the bathroom. He strips his clothes off and turns on the shower before stepping in. The water is nearly scalding, just the way he likes it. He can feel the water washing away the sweat from his body while his muscles slowly relax. 

He closes his eyes and stands under the water for several long minutes, letting it cascade down his body. He takes measured breaths, inhaling deeply, pausing, and exhaling slowly. With each breath he lets his thoughts bleed from his mind until there is nothing.

Eventually, he needs to wash his hair and body. He squirts his body wash on his washcloth and lathers it up. The scent of lavender and eucalyptus swirls around him, enveloping him as he drags it first across his chest then down his body. The subtle lavender is soothing while the eucalyptus is refreshing and provides mental clarity.  

For the moment, he has succeeded in his goal of forgetting all about you. But all of that goes down the drain the moment he begins to wash his hair. The feeling of his fingers scrubbing his scalp immediately makes him flashback to that morning at the salon. 

You squirt a couple of pumps of shampoo into your palm, rubbing it between your hands before working it into a lather in his hair. While you work the shampoo into his tresses, you massage his scalp. Your fingers work a kind of magic that has all the tension melting from his body. It feels like heaven.

Every now and then, your fingernails also lightly scratch his scalp. Each scratch lights up his nerve endings and sends a current of pleasure rippling through his body. He can’t help the slight shiver that follows. He can feel his cock twitching to life between his legs, pressing against his pants. 

The flashback ends abruptly when the shower water begins to run cold. The water streaming down his body may be cold, but his cock hangs hot and heavy from the memory. He exhales shakily and shivers from the cold water. He quickly rinses the shampoo from his hair and by the time he finishes, his body has calmed down, but his mind has not. 

His thoughts race as he steps out of the shower. He dries himself off before wrapping the towel around his waist and heading back to his room. He dresses in sweats and a baggy t-shirt before flopping on his bed once again. 

As he stretches out, his hand hits the crumpled receipt paper he had discarded earlier. He grabs it and sits up. He uncrumples it and smooths the paper against his thigh.

In case you want to do more than look ###-###-#### Y/N.

Before he can second - or third - guess himself, he punches the number into his phone. 

He’s always liked to play with fire. 

You were stretched out in bed, relieving your tired muscles. Your hours at the salon were long and draining, and your hands and feet often hurt after a shift. In the end, you didn't really mind though. It paid well enough, and since it was a high end salon, you'd get to meet the occasional Kpop idol or actor.

While you laid there, you opened your socials for your nightly doom scrolling. It didn't take much scrolling before Kpop fan edits began to show up in your feed. You double-tapped your screen to like a video here or there.

You abruptly stopped scrolling as the next video played and you saw a familiar face. It was a fancam of Hyunjin’s Megaverse dance break. God, he looked so handsome. You admired the precise control he had over his body. You were in absolute awe. And when he hip-thrusted in time to the music, well, let’s just say you felt your entire body flush. You let the video replay several more times - drinking in every single detail. 

Your rapt attention was broken when your phone vibrated with a text notification. Startled, you let the phone slip from your grip and it lands on your face. You let out a pained squeak and sit up. Who could be texting you at this time? All your friends and family live across the world from you. 

You scoff to yourself a little incredulously. There was no way the Hyunjin of Stray Kids was texting you. If you were being honest, you're not sure why you left him your number. Sure, you would have had to be blind to miss either his blatant appreciation of your body or his physical reaction during his appointment. He had flirted, and you had even flirted back. But still, you never would have expected him to actually text you. He was an idol and you were, well, nobody really.

Yet, against all odds, here he was. So you saved his number, took a deep breath, and texted him back.

You giggle to yourself and suppress a smile while kicking your feet. You’re going on a date with Hyunjin!

The next day you put on a pair of lacy panties and a short, flowing dress that ties behind your neck. There is a triangle of skin showing between your breasts and it leaves your back wide open. It’s modest enough but makes you feel cute, maybe even sexy. You slip on a pair of ballet flats and pack a pair of wedge sandals for later. Satisfied with your appearance, you grab your makeup bag and head to the salon to start your shift. 

When you arrive at District 9 you place your belongings in the break room before checking your bookings for the day, you have a full schedule of clients with hardly a break in between. You inhale a deep breath before exhaling slowly, preparing yourself mentally for the day. And then you put a smile on your face and prepare your station for the first client. 

By lunchtime you are absolutely famished. You run down the street to the convenience store and buy a kimbap and a can of milkis. When you return, you all but fall into a break room chair, eager to put your feet up for a few minutes. You pull out your phone as you begin to wolf down your food. You see you have a new notification. 

Skipping ahead to ‘darling’ already? You giggle to yourself and shake your head. Even though you’ve been busy, you can’t help but feel like the day is dragging on. Only four more hours to go. Hwaiting! you tell yourself.

With some measure of luck, your 4’clock, your last appointment of the day, cancels at the last minute. You breathe a sigh of relief and ask your coworker to give you a blowout and style. They loosely curl your hair while you chat about your plans for the evening. You explain that you’re going on a date, but you’re careful not to mention who you’re going on a date with. 

They add a finishing touch by pulling half of your hair back into a fishtail braid secured with a cute ribbon. Happy with the look, you thank them and spend the remaining time putting on some light makeup. Just after 5, you slip out of your flats, put on your wedges. After a final check in the mirror, you grab your bag and walk out the door. 

Hyunjin stands outside of the salon, leaning against the car he’s using for the night. He’s dressed casually and wearing a mask with a ball cap pulled low to help conceal his identity. He arrived just before 5 and has been waiting for you. As he waits, he nonchalantly scrolls through his socials. To passersby, he looks calm and collected. 

The truth is, he’s nervous. His palms are sweating, and a closer look would reveal a slight tremor of the hands. For one, it’s been years since he’s been on anything resembling a date. He definitely doesn’t think outings with the other members count. For two, there were nigh on countless things that could go wrong, and any number of them could cause a scandal. 

He knew he was taking a risk - maybe even a major risk - but there was just something so alluring about you. From the beginning, the moment he walked into District 9, he’s been drawn to you like a moth to a flame. He’s always liked to play with fire. 

He looks up when you walk out of the salon, and the world seems to stop turning, if only for a moment. You call out a soft greeting, and he shivers with pleasure, his name never sounding sweeter than it does coming out of your lips. You look absolutely radiant with your hair falling in soft curls around your shoulders. A light breeze ruffles the skirt of your dress, allowing him a brief glimpse of your plush thighs. 

He subconsciously gives his lips a quick lick before subtly wiping his palms on his pants as he pockets his phone. He gives you a bright smile and walks to open the passenger door. 

“Your chariot awaits, miss!” he chuckles with a playful bow.  

He watches as you mock curtsey back to him and go to get in the car. The car is a little lower than you expected, and he watches as you stumble. Without even thinking, his hands reach out to stabilize you. Your waist underneath his hands feels just right - you’re so warm. The perfect balance of soft and firm. 

He can’t help but give you a gentle squeeze as he helps you into the car. You give him the brightest smile in return. It’s a smile bright enough to melt all of his nerves away. When he shuts your car door and walks around to the driver's side, he has to take a moment to adjust himself in his pants. 

As you settle into the seat of the car, you close your eyes and take a deep breath to calm your nerves. The air is permeated with the scent of Hyunjin. It’s lightly floral with a hint of something else - spicy or herbal? You find it suits him perfectly. 

Just a moment later, the driver’s door opens and Hyunjin folds his long legs into the car. He puts on his seatbelt and makes sure that yours is buckled as well. Then he gives you a bright smile and starts the car. You give him a smile back and he pulls out of the parking lot. 

You study Hyunjin as he drives. Even doing something so mundane, he looks stunning. He’s relaxed in the driver’s seat. His left hand is on the steering wheel while his right hand rests on the gear shift between the two of you. You didn't think you had a thing for hands, but you can’t help but study his hands. 

You observe the way the veins on the back of his hand faintly protrude and snake up his forearm. His fingers are long and adorned with silver rings. His nails are well manicured but unpainted. As you stare, you can't help but imagine the way his hands might feel on you - and in you.

Would his palms be soft or rough against your skin? Are his hands warm or cold? What would the cool metal of his rings feel like as he glides his hands over your body? What would his rings feel like pressed against your folds? And oh - how deep inside would those long fingers reach?

You can feel your body begin to heat up in response to your wayward thoughts - starting with a tingling sensation between your thighs.You shift your gaze outside the window and exhale a shaky breath. You loosely grip the hem of your dress in your fists and subtly squeeze your thighs together. A futily seeking any sort of relief.

Determined to keep looking out the window, you miss the way Hyunjin subtly shifts his gaze to you as you press your thighs. You miss the way he swallows, his adam’s apple bobbing, before clenching his jaw. However determined you are, you can’t miss the way tension seems to rise in the car - an energy, a dangerous attraction sparking to life between the two of you.

Thankfully, the car ride is brief and soon enough Hyunjin is parking the car. You take a deep breath as you exit the car. Thankfully, the open air seems to break the tension between you. He’s brought you to the outskirts out the city and as he leads you down the street, he tells you about the little hole-in-the-wall BBQ restaurant the other members found. He and the others have frequented the restaurant enough to befriend the owner who always ensures they have a private room in the back away from the prying eyes of the public. 

Once inside the restaurant, he greets the employees with friendly familiarity and walks toward the very room he just mentioned to you. Ever the gentleman, he pulls out your chair to seat you first. 

“And they say chivalry is dead,” you tease with a smirk. 

He waves you off with a playful scowl, but a faint blush tinges his cheeks as he takes his seat across from you. 

You feel the spark of attraction flare back to life now that you’re seated across from him. As you examine the menu, you wonder if he feels the same. You glance up at him, and find that he is already looking at you. You flush as you meet his eyes and exchange a shy smile. 

You gesture to the menu and ask if he has any recommendations. You spend the next several minutes discussing the menu, stealing glances while the other isn’t looking. At restaurants like these, there’s a fine line between not enough food and too much food and neither of you want to eat too much food. After much deliberation you settle on an order of galbi and samgyeopsal with rice for the both of you. 

Hyunjin leaves the room to place the order, and you fan your face, feeling a bit warm. You’re certain that you must be flushed. When he returns, he relaxes into his seat, one arm across the back of the other chair while his other hand rests on the table. He flashes you a bright smile. 

“So, Y/N tell me about yourself - outside of your job what do you like to do?” he asks?

You spend several minutes animatedly detailing your numerous interests and hobbies - most prominently how you love to read and listen to music. You admit that you are a big fan of kpop and watch his face light up when you reveal you’ve been a Stay for about a year now. He puts on a serious face and asks you who your bias is, pouting when it’s not him. 

You've seen him pout before on live, but it's different in person. Your eyes are immediately drawn to his lush lips. They look soft and hydrated - absolutely kissable. You shake your head to dismiss the thought before it can go any further and reach a hand across the table to where his hand is resting. 

You pat his hand as you give him a sly grin, “there’s plenty of time for me to be swayed. You could still become my favorite.” In an uncharacteristically bold move, you seal your words with a wink.

His mouth falls open, whether in shock or rebuttal you don’t know, because before he can get any words out, the food arrives. The owner himself and another employee bring in the food. They light the grill and place the meat and tongs near Hyunjin then beautifully arrange the banchan dishes before politely bowing and excusing themselves. 

Hyunjin wields the tongs with practiced ease. You shamelessly admire him from across the table while he places first the samgyeopsal and then galbi on the grill. He then takes the scissors and cuts each strip into smaller pieces. The grill is still heating up when the meat is first added, but soon enough your ears and nostrils are filled with the sizzling sounds and tantalizing smells of grilling meat. Your mouth waters in response.

As Hyunjin carefully tends the meat, turning each piece several times, you chat casually. As time passes, you both grow bolder, exchanging flirting words and glances. You feel your face grow warm - whether from the heat of the grill or from the flames of desire, you can't say. Although you could wager a guess.

You're uncertain how much time has truly passed, but soon enough Hyunjin begins removing the first round of meat from the grill and placing them on the nearby serving platter. While he lets the meat rest, he starts laying the second round out on the grill.

After he finishes arranging and cutting the meat in the grill, he picks up a piece of galbi with his chopsticks and holds it out to you. 

“Here, pretty girl, the first piece is for you!”

You flush even further but open your mouth to accept the piece of meat. Your taste buds are immediately assaulted by the sweet, salty, and slightly smoky flavor of the galbi. The meat is so tender it practically falls apart on your mouth without chewing. You close your eyes and moan appreciatively. 

Hyunjin makes some sort of strangled noise, and when you open your eyes, you find him staring at you with lust in his eyes. You meet his heated gaze, with heat in your own gaze, and smile.       

You and Hyunjin take your time; both of you enjoy the carefully cooked meat, delicious banchan, and each other's company. When the food is gone, Hyunjin rises and offers you his hand, which you happily take.

You let him lead you to the front where he pays for the meal before opening the door and ushering you out. Darkness fell while you were eating and without the heat of the sun you find the night breeze just a little chilly. 

Hyunjin pulls you close and guides you back to the car with his hand on your lower back. Your interactions during the meal has nurtured the spark of attraction between you into a roaring flame of desire. As such, you're hyper aware of his hand against your back - the heat from his palm radiates through your body. The warmth spreads throughout your body and pools low in your stomach.

Like earlier, Hyunjin opens your car door and helps you in. As you settle into your seat, you know one thing for certain: your stomach may be pleasantly full, but you're filled with a hunger of an entirely different nature.                                                                           

After he slides into the driver's seat, Hyunjin types the address you give him into his phone. It turns out you only live a few blocks from the salon, so he knows the drive won't take long. Is that a blessing or a curse?

The atmosphere in the car comes to life with the unspoken sexual tension between you and him. Hyunjin feels his cock twitching within the confines of his pants. He inhales a deep, measured breath through his nose in an effort to calm himself. Instead, he gets a deep inhale of your sweet perfume, and he only grows harder. He grips the steering wheel so tightly his knuckles turn white. 

Traffic is lighter this time of day, and in no time at all Hyunjin finds himself parked in front of your apartment. He isn't ready to say goodbye to you, and it seems you aren't quite ready to part either because you haven't made any moves to exit the car. 

Then, it seems you both make up your minds because you speak at the same time he does.

“Hyun-”

“Y/N-”

He gestures for you to continue and waits while you unbuckle your seatbelt to turn and face him. He watches as you close your eyes and take a deep breath before blurting out, “Hyunjin, would you like to come up with me? I don't want the night to end yet…”

For several long seconds he doesn’t move, and he doesn't say anything. He's warring with himself - he wants so badly to go with you. He can't deny how intensely he desires you. He feels like he's burning from the inside out. Following you up to your apartment would just be playing with fire.

You, unfortunately, take his silence as rejection. Your voice trembles as you ramble, “I’m sorry if I misread any signs…I had a great time, but I'll just get going now.”

You scramble to open your door and exit the car, and this shakes him out of his thoughts. He catches your wrist and pulls you back, smashing his lips to yours. 

Your lips against his are so soft and they part in surprise. He takes the opportunity to slip his tongue between them, meeting yours. He relishes in the way your tongue dances with his. He kisses you for several long minutes. By the time he breaks the kiss, you're both out of breath. 

“Please, Y/N,” he pants, “I want you.”

He's always like to play with fire.

He follows closely behind you as you lead him up to your apartment, opting to take the stairs rather than the elevator for discretion. You're out of breath when you stop outside of apartment 14-3. 

You quickly enter the code to your door, and he follows. As soon as you're both inside, he shuts the door and spins you both, so you're pinned against the door, caged in his arms. He claims your lips again in a feverish kiss and you respond in kind. 

As your lips clash and tongues tangle, he maneuvers his thigh between your legs, pressing against your clothed mound. He can feel the heat radiating from your core. And when you begin to shift your hips, he can feel the wetness seeping through your panties. Each time you grind down on his thigh, you also inadvertently provide friction to his aching cock. 

Eventually he can't take it anymore and he breaks the kiss.

“Please, Y/N,” he pants. “I need to taste you. Can I taste you?”

When you nod, blushing, he picks you up, hands gripping your thighs.

He kisses you and then asks, “bed or couch, pretty girl?”

“Couch - living room is through there,” you respond breathlessly, gesturing with your chin. 

He gently sets you down on the couch and wastes no time kneeling before you on the floor. You lift your hips slightly and he peels your panties off, sliding his hands gently down your thighs as he goes. Thick strings of your arousal cling to your panties and he shamelessly sniffs them before throwing them haphazardly to the side. 

“You smell delicious, pretty.”

He smirks at the way your face flames red at his actions and positions himself between your thighs. His slender shoulders keep your legs spread apart. 

He uses his thumbs to spread your lips apart and takes a moment to admire the view before diving straight in. Using the flat of his tongue he slowly licks a thick stripe from your entrance to your clit. Your slick tastes divine - a pleasant balance between sweet and tangy - and he moans. 

He repeats the action a few more times, just as slowly, before dipping the tip of his tongue into your entrance, seeking more of your nectar straight from the source. He could get drunk on you - but it's not enough. 

He shifts your thighs to rest on top of his shoulders, sandwiching his head. He stiffens his tongue and thrusts it into your core, spearing you open. From this new position he can reach deeper, and he repeats the motion again and again. Licking, sucking, slurping. 

You're both moaning messes and he can feel your thighs quivering. 

“Hyunjin, more,” you plead, canting your hips. 

Happy to oblige, he slowly works two of his fingers into you. He scissors them apart and works you open while questing for your g-spot. At the same time, he wraps his lips around your clit. 

When he finds that area of slightly spongy flesh, he gently presses into it, massaging small circles into the flesh. Simultaneously, he uses the tip of his tongue to quickly flick your sensitive bud - all that hard work at learning enunciation paying off. 

Although your thighs muffle all sounds, he can still hear your moans and whimpers. They grow in volume and frequency as he pushes you towards your high. 

Your thighs clamp shut around his head as he pushes you over the edge. He drinks you down, not letting a single drop of your cum go to waste. You moan his name, “Jinnie!!”

He was wrong earlier - the way you moan his name in the height of pleasure is the sweetest sound. And he wants to hear you do it over and over again.

You relax into the couch cushions, breathing hard. You look down between your thighs to where Hyunjin is emerging, his face glistening with the remnants of your release. “Holy fuck, Jinnie…” you pant. “Wait, can I call you, Jinnie?”

He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, before wiping the hand on his pants. He stands up, slowly unfolding his lithe body, and plops himself down beside you. He raises a hand to your cheek and gently turns your head. 

“You can call me whatever you like, darling,” he murmurs. 

You meet his eyes and smile before leaning in and capturing his lips. He tastes like you, but you don't mind. You deepen the kiss, licking into his mouth. When you eventually withdraw, you tug at his lower lip with your teeth, and he whimpers.

“You taste good, Jinnie,” you croon. “But I bet I know something that tastes even better.”

You slide off the couch until you're the one kneeling between his thighs. 

“What do you say, Jinnie baby…” You look up at him, eyes shrouded behind your long lashes. “Can I return the favor?”

You relish in the way he whimpers, “please.”

Your fingers deftly unbutton his pants before you lean forward taking the zipper between your teeth. 

“Fuck…” he hisses, staring down at you. “That's so fucking hot.”

You grin and hook your fingers into the waistband of both his boxer briefs and pants. You give them a gentle tug and he lifts his hips to help you slide them off in one go. You let them pool around his ankles, too distracted by his newly freed cock, which smacks against his clothed abdomen. 

As far as phalluses go, Hyunjin’s is beautiful. It isn’t the thickest you’ve ever seen, but it’s long with the slightest curve to the left. Like his hands, there is a protruding vein that runs along the underside from base to tip. His cockhead is an angry red and leaking precum. With each beat of his heart, his cock pulses and a little more precum oozes out. 

“Eyes on me,” you say before slowly dragging your tongue up the underside of his cock, tracing the vein, before swirling it around his tip and sucking hard. You let your tongue dip into his slit and gather more of his salty essence. He lets out a breathy moan. He can't control the way his hips jerk up, pressing himself further into your mouth. He feels guilty, stuttering out an “I’m sorry” but you pay him no mind, simply humming around his cock and pressing his hips back into the couch. Your display of dominance combined with the subtle vibrations make his brain go fuzzy. His eyes roll to the back of his head, and he relaxes into the couch. 

Still loosely holding his hips, you bob your head up and down, taking more of his cock each down stroke. You gag a little when he finally hits the back of your throat, tears springing to your eyes unbidden. You pause for a moment, taking a deep breath, before taking him into your mouth again. You relax your throat and swallow him down inch by inch. 

He lets out a strangled cry and his hips jerk again involuntarily. You tighten your grip on his hips and shove them back into the couch. Pinning him down, you redouble your efforts until his thighs are tense and trembling. 

“I’m so close, please…” he begs. For what - to stop, to continue - neither of you know. 

You slide one hand from his hip to cup his balls as you swallow down his length. As you work your throat around him, he can’t hold back. He reaches one hand down to cup your cheek and emits a strangled moan as he cums straight down your throat. 

You swallow everything down before releasing his cock with a pop. 

Hyunjin knows he’s a goner as soon as he looks down at you kneeling between his feet - spit dribbling down your chin and tear tracks lining your cheeks.

You’re beautiful. 

This was supposed to be a one-time thing. 

To quell the fire inside of him

But this has only been a match in the gas tank. 

There is now an inferno that rages only for you. And he doubts it will be just a one-time thing.   

A/N: Hey all, I hope you enjoyed the 2nd part of Of Haircuts and Hyunjin. Thank you for making it this far. If you enjoyed, please let me know if you'd be interested in a 3rd part. Let me know if you'd like to be tagged in any of my work.

Tag list: @skzdust @catiuskaa

Play with Fire

Pairing: Hyunjin x afab!reader, Hyunjin x y/n

Summary: The follow up to Of Haircuts and Hyunjin - After his visit to District 9 Salon, Hyunjin can't stop thinking about you. He reaches out to you and ends up taking you on a date.

WC: 5.1k

SS: 3

AU: idol!Hyunjin

Genre: Smut

Content Warnings: Intended for 18+ mature audiences, MDNI! Kissing, oral sex (cunnilingus and fellatio)

Nets: @mirohs-aurora-society @neverendingdreams-net

Part 1

After he left the salon, he had stuffed the receipt into his pocket and headed to the company practice rooms. All through dance practice it felt as though that little piece of paper was burning a hole in his pocket. Thankfully he didn’t make any mistakes, but he wasn’t as focused on his dancing as he should be - all because he couldn’t stop thinking about the message. He couldn’t stop thinking about you.

Hyunjin returns to the dorm after dance practice and flops on his bed. He removes the little receipt paper from his pocket and holds it in his hand. He reads the message and then re-reads it.

In case you want to do more than look ###-###-#### Y/N.

He crumples the receipt and tosses it to the side with a sigh. He should just forget all about it, forget all about you. While he and the other members are no longer under a dating ban, strictly speaking, it is still discouraged by the company. Seeing you would just be playing with fire. He runs a hand through his hair and sighs again. Maybe a shower will help clear his thoughts.

He grabs a towel from the linen closet and pads down the hallway to the bathroom. He strips his clothes off and turns on the shower before stepping in. The water is nearly scalding, just the way he likes it. He can feel the water washing away the sweat from his body while his muscles slowly relax. 

He closes his eyes and stands under the water for several long minutes, letting it cascade down his body. He takes measured breaths, inhaling deeply, pausing, and exhaling slowly. With each breath he lets his thoughts bleed from his mind until there is nothing.

Eventually, he needs to wash his hair and body. He squirts his body wash on his washcloth and lathers it up. The scent of lavender and eucalyptus swirls around him, enveloping him as he drags it first across his chest then down his body. The subtle lavender is soothing while the eucalyptus is refreshing and provides mental clarity.  

For the moment, he has succeeded in his goal of forgetting all about you. But all of that goes down the drain the moment he begins to wash his hair. The feeling of his fingers scrubbing his scalp immediately makes him flashback to that morning at the salon. 

You squirt a couple of pumps of shampoo into your palm, rubbing it between your hands before working it into a lather in his hair. While you work the shampoo into his tresses, you massage his scalp. Your fingers work a kind of magic that has all the tension melting from his body. It feels like heaven.

Every now and then, your fingernails also lightly scratch his scalp. Each scratch lights up his nerve endings and sends a current of pleasure rippling through his body. He can’t help the slight shiver that follows. He can feel his cock twitching to life between his legs, pressing against his pants. 

The flashback ends abruptly when the shower water begins to run cold. The water streaming down his body may be cold, but his cock hangs hot and heavy from the memory. He exhales shakily and shivers from the cold water. He quickly rinses the shampoo from his hair and by the time he finishes, his body has calmed down, but his mind has not. 

His thoughts race as he steps out of the shower. He dries himself off before wrapping the towel around his waist and heading back to his room. He dresses in sweats and a baggy t-shirt before flopping on his bed once again. 

As he stretches out, his hand hits the crumpled receipt paper he had discarded earlier. He grabs it and sits up. He uncrumples it and smooths the paper against his thigh.

In case you want to do more than look ###-###-#### Y/N.

Before he can second - or third - guess himself, he punches the number into his phone. 

He’s always liked to play with fire. 

You were stretched out in bed, relieving your tired muscles. Your hours at the salon were long and draining, and your hands and feet often hurt after a shift. In the end, you didn't really mind though. It paid well enough, and since it was a high end salon, you'd get to meet the occasional Kpop idol or actor.

While you laid there, you opened your socials for your nightly doom scrolling. It didn't take much scrolling before Kpop fan edits began to show up in your feed. You double-tapped your screen to like a video here or there.

You abruptly stopped scrolling as the next video played and you saw a familiar face. It was a fancam of Hyunjin’s Megaverse dance break. God, he looked so handsome. You admired the precise control he had over his body. You were in absolute awe. And when he hip-thrusted in time to the music, well, let’s just say you felt your entire body flush. You let the video replay several more times - drinking in every single detail. 

Your rapt attention was broken when your phone vibrated with a text notification. Startled, you let the phone slip from your grip and it lands on your face. You let out a pained squeak and sit up. Who could be texting you at this time? All your friends and family live across the world from you. 

You scoff to yourself a little incredulously. There was no way the Hyunjin of Stray Kids was texting you. If you were being honest, you're not sure why you left him your number. Sure, you would have had to be blind to miss either his blatant appreciation of your body or his physical reaction during his appointment. He had flirted, and you had even flirted back. But still, you never would have expected him to actually text you. He was an idol and you were, well, nobody really.

Yet, against all odds, here he was. So you saved his number, took a deep breath, and texted him back.

You giggle to yourself and suppress a smile while kicking your feet. You’re going on a date with Hyunjin!

The next day you put on a pair of lacy panties and a short, flowing dress that ties behind your neck. There is a triangle of skin showing between your breasts and it leaves your back wide open. It’s modest enough but makes you feel cute, maybe even sexy. You slip on a pair of ballet flats and pack a pair of wedge sandals for later. Satisfied with your appearance, you grab your makeup bag and head to the salon to start your shift. 

When you arrive at District 9 you place your belongings in the break room before checking your bookings for the day, you have a full schedule of clients with hardly a break in between. You inhale a deep breath before exhaling slowly, preparing yourself mentally for the day. And then you put a smile on your face and prepare your station for the first client. 

By lunchtime you are absolutely famished. You run down the street to the convenience store and buy a kimbap and a can of milkis. When you return, you all but fall into a break room chair, eager to put your feet up for a few minutes. You pull out your phone as you begin to wolf down your food. You see you have a new notification. 

Skipping ahead to ‘darling’ already? You giggle to yourself and shake your head. Even though you’ve been busy, you can’t help but feel like the day is dragging on. Only four more hours to go. Hwaiting! you tell yourself.

With some measure of luck, your 4’clock, your last appointment of the day, cancels at the last minute. You breathe a sigh of relief and ask your coworker to give you a blowout and style. They loosely curl your hair while you chat about your plans for the evening. You explain that you’re going on a date, but you’re careful not to mention who you’re going on a date with. 

They add a finishing touch by pulling half of your hair back into a fishtail braid secured with a cute ribbon. Happy with the look, you thank them and spend the remaining time putting on some light makeup. Just after 5, you slip out of your flats, put on your wedges. After a final check in the mirror, you grab your bag and walk out the door. 

Hyunjin stands outside of the salon, leaning against the car he’s using for the night. He’s dressed casually and wearing a mask with a ball cap pulled low to help conceal his identity. He arrived just before 5 and has been waiting for you. As he waits, he nonchalantly scrolls through his socials. To passersby, he looks calm and collected. 

The truth is, he’s nervous. His palms are sweating, and a closer look would reveal a slight tremor of the hands. For one, it’s been years since he’s been on anything resembling a date. He definitely doesn’t think outings with the other members count. For two, there were nigh on countless things that could go wrong, and any number of them could cause a scandal. 

He knew he was taking a risk - maybe even a major risk - but there was just something so alluring about you. From the beginning, the moment he walked into District 9, he’s been drawn to you like a moth to a flame. He’s always liked to play with fire. 

He looks up when you walk out of the salon, and the world seems to stop turning, if only for a moment. You call out a soft greeting, and he shivers with pleasure, his name never sounding sweeter than it does coming out of your lips. You look absolutely radiant with your hair falling in soft curls around your shoulders. A light breeze ruffles the skirt of your dress, allowing him a brief glimpse of your plush thighs. 

He subconsciously gives his lips a quick lick before subtly wiping his palms on his pants as he pockets his phone. He gives you a bright smile and walks to open the passenger door. 

“Your chariot awaits, miss!” he chuckles with a playful bow.  

He watches as you mock curtsey back to him and go to get in the car. The car is a little lower than you expected, and he watches as you stumble. Without even thinking, his hands reach out to stabilize you. Your waist underneath his hands feels just right - you’re so warm. The perfect balance of soft and firm. 

He can’t help but give you a gentle squeeze as he helps you into the car. You give him the brightest smile in return. It’s a smile bright enough to melt all of his nerves away. When he shuts your car door and walks around to the driver's side, he has to take a moment to adjust himself in his pants. 

As you settle into the seat of the car, you close your eyes and take a deep breath to calm your nerves. The air is permeated with the scent of Hyunjin. It’s lightly floral with a hint of something else - spicy or herbal? You find it suits him perfectly. 

Just a moment later, the driver’s door opens and Hyunjin folds his long legs into the car. He puts on his seatbelt and makes sure that yours is buckled as well. Then he gives you a bright smile and starts the car. You give him a smile back and he pulls out of the parking lot. 

You study Hyunjin as he drives. Even doing something so mundane, he looks stunning. He’s relaxed in the driver’s seat. His left hand is on the steering wheel while his right hand rests on the gear shift between the two of you. You didn't think you had a thing for hands, but you can’t help but study his hands. 

You observe the way the veins on the back of his hand faintly protrude and snake up his forearm. His fingers are long and adorned with silver rings. His nails are well manicured but unpainted. As you stare, you can't help but imagine the way his hands might feel on you - and in you.

Would his palms be soft or rough against your skin? Are his hands warm or cold? What would the cool metal of his rings feel like as he glides his hands over your body? What would his rings feel like pressed against your folds? And oh - how deep inside would those long fingers reach?

You can feel your body begin to heat up in response to your wayward thoughts - starting with a tingling sensation between your thighs.You shift your gaze outside the window and exhale a shaky breath. You loosely grip the hem of your dress in your fists and subtly squeeze your thighs together. A futily seeking any sort of relief.

Determined to keep looking out the window, you miss the way Hyunjin subtly shifts his gaze to you as you press your thighs. You miss the way he swallows, his adam’s apple bobbing, before clenching his jaw. However determined you are, you can’t miss the way tension seems to rise in the car - an energy, a dangerous attraction sparking to life between the two of you.

Thankfully, the car ride is brief and soon enough Hyunjin is parking the car. You take a deep breath as you exit the car. Thankfully, the open air seems to break the tension between you. He’s brought you to the outskirts out the city and as he leads you down the street, he tells you about the little hole-in-the-wall BBQ restaurant the other members found. He and the others have frequented the restaurant enough to befriend the owner who always ensures they have a private room in the back away from the prying eyes of the public. 

Once inside the restaurant, he greets the employees with friendly familiarity and walks toward the very room he just mentioned to you. Ever the gentleman, he pulls out your chair to seat you first. 

“And they say chivalry is dead,” you tease with a smirk. 

He waves you off with a playful scowl, but a faint blush tinges his cheeks as he takes his seat across from you. 

You feel the spark of attraction flare back to life now that you’re seated across from him. As you examine the menu, you wonder if he feels the same. You glance up at him, and find that he is already looking at you. You flush as you meet his eyes and exchange a shy smile. 

You gesture to the menu and ask if he has any recommendations. You spend the next several minutes discussing the menu, stealing glances while the other isn’t looking. At restaurants like these, there’s a fine line between not enough food and too much food and neither of you want to eat too much food. After much deliberation you settle on an order of galbi and samgyeopsal with rice for the both of you. 

Hyunjin leaves the room to place the order, and you fan your face, feeling a bit warm. You’re certain that you must be flushed. When he returns, he relaxes into his seat, one arm across the back of the other chair while his other hand rests on the table. He flashes you a bright smile. 

“So, Y/N tell me about yourself - outside of your job what do you like to do?” he asks?

You spend several minutes animatedly detailing your numerous interests and hobbies - most prominently how you love to read and listen to music. You admit that you are a big fan of kpop and watch his face light up when you reveal you’ve been a Stay for about a year now. He puts on a serious face and asks you who your bias is, pouting when it’s not him. 

You've seen him pout before on live, but it's different in person. Your eyes are immediately drawn to his lush lips. They look soft and hydrated - absolutely kissable. You shake your head to dismiss the thought before it can go any further and reach a hand across the table to where his hand is resting. 

You pat his hand as you give him a sly grin, “there’s plenty of time for me to be swayed. You could still become my favorite.” In an uncharacteristically bold move, you seal your words with a wink.

His mouth falls open, whether in shock or rebuttal you don’t know, because before he can get any words out, the food arrives. The owner himself and another employee bring in the food. They light the grill and place the meat and tongs near Hyunjin then beautifully arrange the banchan dishes before politely bowing and excusing themselves. 

Hyunjin wields the tongs with practiced ease. You shamelessly admire him from across the table while he places first the samgyeopsal and then galbi on the grill. He then takes the scissors and cuts each strip into smaller pieces. The grill is still heating up when the meat is first added, but soon enough your ears and nostrils are filled with the sizzling sounds and tantalizing smells of grilling meat. Your mouth waters in response.

As Hyunjin carefully tends the meat, turning each piece several times, you chat casually. As time passes, you both grow bolder, exchanging flirting words and glances. You feel your face grow warm - whether from the heat of the grill or from the flames of desire, you can't say. Although you could wager a guess.

You're uncertain how much time has truly passed, but soon enough Hyunjin begins removing the first round of meat from the grill and placing them on the nearby serving platter. While he lets the meat rest, he starts laying the second round out on the grill.

After he finishes arranging and cutting the meat in the grill, he picks up a piece of galbi with his chopsticks and holds it out to you. 

“Here, pretty girl, the first piece is for you!”

You flush even further but open your mouth to accept the piece of meat. Your taste buds are immediately assaulted by the sweet, salty, and slightly smoky flavor of the galbi. The meat is so tender it practically falls apart on your mouth without chewing. You close your eyes and moan appreciatively. 

Hyunjin makes some sort of strangled noise, and when you open your eyes, you find him staring at you with lust in his eyes. You meet his heated gaze, with heat in your own gaze, and smile.       

You and Hyunjin take your time; both of you enjoy the carefully cooked meat, delicious banchan, and each other's company. When the food is gone, Hyunjin rises and offers you his hand, which you happily take.

You let him lead you to the front where he pays for the meal before opening the door and ushering you out. Darkness fell while you were eating and without the heat of the sun you find the night breeze just a little chilly. 

Hyunjin pulls you close and guides you back to the car with his hand on your lower back. Your interactions during the meal has nurtured the spark of attraction between you into a roaring flame of desire. As such, you're hyper aware of his hand against your back - the heat from his palm radiates through your body. The warmth spreads throughout your body and pools low in your stomach.

Like earlier, Hyunjin opens your car door and helps you in. As you settle into your seat, you know one thing for certain: your stomach may be pleasantly full, but you're filled with a hunger of an entirely different nature.                                                                           

After he slides into the driver's seat, Hyunjin types the address you give him into his phone. It turns out you only live a few blocks from the salon, so he knows the drive won't take long. Is that a blessing or a curse?

The atmosphere in the car comes to life with the unspoken sexual tension between you and him. Hyunjin feels his cock twitching within the confines of his pants. He inhales a deep, measured breath through his nose in an effort to calm himself. Instead, he gets a deep inhale of your sweet perfume, and he only grows harder. He grips the steering wheel so tightly his knuckles turn white. 

Traffic is lighter this time of day, and in no time at all Hyunjin finds himself parked in front of your apartment. He isn't ready to say goodbye to you, and it seems you aren't quite ready to part either because you haven't made any moves to exit the car. 

Then, it seems you both make up your minds because you speak at the same time he does.

“Hyun-”

“Y/N-”

He gestures for you to continue and waits while you unbuckle your seatbelt to turn and face him. He watches as you close your eyes and take a deep breath before blurting out, “Hyunjin, would you like to come up with me? I don't want the night to end yet…”

For several long seconds he doesn’t move, and he doesn't say anything. He's warring with himself - he wants so badly to go with you. He can't deny how intensely he desires you. He feels like he's burning from the inside out. Following you up to your apartment would just be playing with fire.

You, unfortunately, take his silence as rejection. Your voice trembles as you ramble, “I’m sorry if I misread any signs…I had a great time, but I'll just get going now.”

You scramble to open your door and exit the car, and this shakes him out of his thoughts. He catches your wrist and pulls you back, smashing his lips to yours. 

Your lips against his are so soft and they part in surprise. He takes the opportunity to slip his tongue between them, meeting yours. He relishes in the way your tongue dances with his. He kisses you for several long minutes. By the time he breaks the kiss, you're both out of breath. 

“Please, Y/N,” he pants, “I want you.”

He's always like to play with fire.

He follows closely behind you as you lead him up to your apartment, opting to take the stairs rather than the elevator for discretion. You're out of breath when you stop outside of apartment 14-3. 

You quickly enter the code to your door, and he follows. As soon as you're both inside, he shuts the door and spins you both, so you're pinned against the door, caged in his arms. He claims your lips again in a feverish kiss and you respond in kind. 

As your lips clash and tongues tangle, he maneuvers his thigh between your legs, pressing against your clothed mound. He can feel the heat radiating from your core. And when you begin to shift your hips, he can feel the wetness seeping through your panties. Each time you grind down on his thigh, you also inadvertently provide friction to his aching cock. 

Eventually he can't take it anymore and he breaks the kiss.

“Please, Y/N,” he pants. “I need to taste you. Can I taste you?”

When you nod, blushing, he picks you up, hands gripping your thighs.

He kisses you and then asks, “bed or couch, pretty girl?”

“Couch - living room is through there,” you respond breathlessly, gesturing with your chin. 

He gently sets you down on the couch and wastes no time kneeling before you on the floor. You lift your hips slightly and he peels your panties off, sliding his hands gently down your thighs as he goes. Thick strings of your arousal cling to your panties and he shamelessly sniffs them before throwing them haphazardly to the side. 

“You smell delicious, pretty.”

He smirks at the way your face flames red at his actions and positions himself between your thighs. His slender shoulders keep your legs spread apart. 

He uses his thumbs to spread your lips apart and takes a moment to admire the view before diving straight in. Using the flat of his tongue he slowly licks a thick stripe from your entrance to your clit. Your slick tastes divine - a pleasant balance between sweet and tangy - and he moans. 

He repeats the action a few more times, just as slowly, before dipping the tip of his tongue into your entrance, seeking more of your nectar straight from the source. He could get drunk on you - but it's not enough. 

He shifts your thighs to rest on top of his shoulders, sandwiching his head. He stiffens his tongue and thrusts it into your core, spearing you open. From this new position he can reach deeper, and he repeats the motion again and again. Licking, sucking, slurping. 

You're both moaning messes and he can feel your thighs quivering. 

“Hyunjin, more,” you plead, canting your hips. 

Happy to oblige, he slowly works two of his fingers into you. He scissors them apart and works you open while questing for your g-spot. At the same time, he wraps his lips around your clit. 

When he finds that area of slightly spongy flesh, he gently presses into it, massaging small circles into the flesh. Simultaneously, he uses the tip of his tongue to quickly flick your sensitive bud - all that hard work at learning enunciation paying off. 

Although your thighs muffle all sounds, he can still hear your moans and whimpers. They grow in volume and frequency as he pushes you towards your high. 

Your thighs clamp shut around his head as he pushes you over the edge. He drinks you down, not letting a single drop of your cum go to waste. You moan his name, “Jinnie!!”

He was wrong earlier - the way you moan his name in the height of pleasure is the sweetest sound. And he wants to hear you do it over and over again.

You relax into the couch cushions, breathing hard. You look down between your thighs to where Hyunjin is emerging, his face glistening with the remnants of your release. “Holy fuck, Jinnie…” you pant. “Wait, can I call you, Jinnie?”

He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, before wiping the hand on his pants. He stands up, slowly unfolding his lithe body, and plops himself down beside you. He raises a hand to your cheek and gently turns your head. 

“You can call me whatever you like, darling,” he murmurs. 

You meet his eyes and smile before leaning in and capturing his lips. He tastes like you, but you don't mind. You deepen the kiss, licking into his mouth. When you eventually withdraw, you tug at his lower lip with your teeth, and he whimpers.

“You taste good, Jinnie,” you croon. “But I bet I know something that tastes even better.”

You slide off the couch until you're the one kneeling between his thighs. 

“What do you say, Jinnie baby…” You look up at him, eyes shrouded behind your long lashes. “Can I return the favor?”

You relish in the way he whimpers, “please.”

Your fingers deftly unbutton his pants before you lean forward taking the zipper between your teeth. 

“Fuck…” he hisses, staring down at you. “That's so fucking hot.”

You grin and hook your fingers into the waistband of both his boxer briefs and pants. You give them a gentle tug and he lifts his hips to help you slide them off in one go. You let them pool around his ankles, too distracted by his newly freed cock, which smacks against his clothed abdomen. 

As far as phalluses go, Hyunjin’s is beautiful. It isn’t the thickest you’ve ever seen, but it’s long with the slightest curve to the left. Like his hands, there is a protruding vein that runs along the underside from base to tip. His cockhead is an angry red and leaking precum. With each beat of his heart, his cock pulses and a little more precum oozes out. 

“Eyes on me,” you say before slowly dragging your tongue up the underside of his cock, tracing the vein, before swirling it around his tip and sucking hard. You let your tongue dip into his slit and gather more of his salty essence. He lets out a breathy moan. He can't control the way his hips jerk up, pressing himself further into your mouth. He feels guilty, stuttering out an “I’m sorry” but you pay him no mind, simply humming around his cock and pressing his hips back into the couch. Your display of dominance combined with the subtle vibrations make his brain go fuzzy. His eyes roll to the back of his head, and he relaxes into the couch. 

Still loosely holding his hips, you bob your head up and down, taking more of his cock each down stroke. You gag a little when he finally hits the back of your throat, tears springing to your eyes unbidden. You pause for a moment, taking a deep breath, before taking him into your mouth again. You relax your throat and swallow him down inch by inch. 

He lets out a strangled cry and his hips jerk again involuntarily. You tighten your grip on his hips and shove them back into the couch. Pinning him down, you redouble your efforts until his thighs are tense and trembling. 

“I’m so close, please…” he begs. For what - to stop, to continue - neither of you know. 

You slide one hand from his hip to cup his balls as you swallow down his length. As you work your throat around him, he can’t hold back. He reaches one hand down to cup your cheek and emits a strangled moan as he cums straight down your throat. 

You swallow everything down before releasing his cock with a pop. 

Hyunjin knows he’s a goner as soon as he looks down at you kneeling between his feet - spit dribbling down your chin and tear tracks lining your cheeks.

You’re beautiful. 

This was supposed to be a one-time thing. 

To quell the fire inside of him

But this has only been a match in the gas tank. 

There is now an inferno that rages only for you. And he doubts it will be just a one-time thing.   

A/N: Hey all, I hope you enjoyed the 2nd part of Of Haircuts and Hyunjin. Thank you for making it this far. If you enjoyed, please let me know if you'd be interested in a 3rd part. Let me know if you'd like to be tagged in any of my work.

Tag list: @skzdust @catiuskaa

up all night

pairing: bang chan x gn!reader w. 3.9k genre: shameless smut summary: chan is in the studio working late, stressed about a deadline and pushed to his limit. you convince him to take his mind off work. warnings: reader has somewhat implied afab anatomy but no gendered terms/pronouns are used. petnames used: baby, love, honey a/n: making my smut debut with chan! written for the best person ever

As of late, Chan has been in the studio far more often than you'd like.

You knew he was a workaholic when you got into the relationship. He cared about his career, music, and group so much he'd push himself to the brink. He wrote, composed, and produced all of his own music and wouldn't have it any other way. If he wanted success, he needed to make it himself.

It came at a cost, though. You saw the way his mental health would deteriorate around the time of deadlines. He'd spend almost entire days in the studio, perfecting every last word and beat. You watched as he shaped this music from his hands, sculpting them to smooth out every edge and imperfection.

Even Chan was far too aware how bad it was for himself. You'd try to find ways for him to take breaks, always bringing him food and water to keep him going. He'd thank you in a million ways, with words and fond touches but it ended in him going back to work.

When he finally was home, he returned to the kind and gentle boyfriend you knew him to be. Holding you as you fell asleep and buying your order at the local coffee shop before you woke up. He'd make you breakfast in bed when he had the time, writing love notes whenever he had to leave before you woke up.

As it always happened, a new deadline was approaching. Chan often slipped out after schedules to the studio and worked himself down to the bone. You tried your hardest to spend as much time in there with him, even if it was just laying on the couch scrolling your feed. Every little thing helped.

That night, you'd ordered him some takeout but it was eaten long ago. The time on your phone showed it was half past three in the morning and Chan was at it in earnest. Headphones on, replaying samples and tweaking sounds.

You looked over from your phone when you heard him swear under his breath and take his headphones off. Chan let out a long sigh and covered his face with his hands for a moment before looking back down at his work.

"It- it just won't sound like I need it to. It's not right, it's.." Chan rambled into the air.

You got up from the couch and walked behind his chair, putting your hands on his broad shoulders and massaging them with your fingers. "I know, Channie. Is there anything I can do to help you right now?"

"No, I'm sorry," Chan let out a long sigh and smiled up at you weakly, "You being here is enough."

You felt a stirring in your stomach at the sentiment, but you wouldn't give up that easily. "I can't just let you suffer alone here. Do you want to take a break or wrap up for the night?"

"I won't remember how I want it tomorrow. If I give up on this now, there's a chance I never fix it and it goes out sounding wrong. I can't do that."

"Chris," You stopped massaging his shoulders to turn his chair around, looking down at him, "I know you want it perfect. Write it down on a sticky note what you want and take a break. It's gonna be four soon and I'm not letting you spend another all nighter here."

Chan looked up at you curiously before deflating back in his chair. "I mean- are you sure? If I forget, it's gonna be noticeable, and-"

"I'll remind you. I'll put it in my phone and tell you exactly what you need to fix. Here, tell me what it is and I'll write it down. Got it?"

Chan paused for a moment before nodding, allowing you to open your phone before speaking. He gave you the exact timestamps of the song and the strange producer jargon that you couldn't quite make sense of. You wrote it down word-for-word just as he needed it.

"There, it's in here for you later," You recited it back to him and he gave a confirmatory nod, "You're all set for tomorrow."

"Tomorrow? I can't be done for the night, there's too much to work on and not enough time. I'm sorry, just another hour. Please?"

You shook your head and set your phone down on the table before sliding into his lap, straddling him in the chair. "You're not working another second on those songs tonight, Chris."

Chan looked up at you a little stunned before a sly smirk crossed his face. "Baby, you know that's not fair to me. I need to work and you're doing something dangerously distracting."

"What are you going to do, then?" You replied back, unable to hold back a grin, "You gonna remove me from your lap to do some boring work instead?"

You could see Chan chew on the inside of his cheek before sighing. "It's not boring, and I really should get back to it.."

"Then you're going to have to remove me yourself, because I'm not moving."

Chan let out a dramatic sigh before his hands moved up the outside of your thighs, resting right next to your hips. "You know damn well I'm not going to do that."

"And why's that, Channie?"

His hands moved over your thighs, giving a light squeeze. "God, you're driving me insane. Coming into the studio every night and making yourself useful at every opportunity.. I wanted so bad to stop just to make you feel good. You deserve that, instead of me working the whole day."

"Your opportunity has finally come, I'm all yours if you want me right now."

Chan chuckled, "You could ask me that a thousand times and I could never say no."

You leaned in to his ear and whispered, "Then make your move."

There was a moment of silence before Chan pulled you in for a kiss, messy and rushed. His hands were all over your thighs, waist, back. He couldn't pick a spot and stick to it, deciding instead everywhere needed to be felt over.

You tried to keep things centered, your arms wrapped around the back of his neck. One of your hands played with the curls growing on the back of his head, enjoying the soft feeling through your fingers. It was the only thing keeping you sane.

His hands finally found a place to reside when he hooked them on the hem of your pants, giving light tugs as you felt him squirming under you. Pulling away from the kiss with a grin, you looked down at Chan and his flushed appearance. "So eager.."

"Can you blame me? Now stand up and help me get those off," Chan demanded with a rushed voice, helping get you to your feet as he followed in your footsteps. His usually deft hands were fumbling as he desperately pulled your pants off of you and discarded them to the floor.

Watching him undo his own sweatpants like a madman had you giggling at the sight. "You go one week without any action, and this is how desperate you get?"

"I'm a starved man, honey," Chan's face was red and already had sweat on his brow, "I can't wait any longer, not after all that teasing."

"Teasing? What-"

"Get on the damn couch."

That much was enough to have you laying down on the couch without hesitating. His sweatpants joined yours on the floor, showing off the black boxers he was sporting underneath. A quick glance showed he was pitching an obvious tent.

Although as quick as you were, Chan caught you looking. He raised his brows and laughed, "And I'm the eager one here?"

"You are the eager one here, hardly put your hands on me and you're giving those boxers a run for their money," You responded with your own laugh.

"You little.." Chan shook his head and leaned over you, putting his weight on one forearm on the couch as he kissed you once more. Instead of the fast and desperate pace he had set before, Chan was far slower and delicate. It was almost infuriatingly slow.

You couldn't show how much you wanted him to go faster, that would only prove his point. Instead, he was slowly breaking you down by the second, one arm stabilizing himself and the other hand on your neck, softly stroking your jaw with his thumb.

The waiting game paid off when Chan suddenly took your bottom lip between his teeth, giving it a small tug before he pulled away. "I can't keep this up. You win. Damn you, I'm eager."

There wasn't time for any words to respond before Chan was back where he was before, sloppy and fast. He kissed down your neck, excessive in his biting and sucking at the sensitive skin. Not expecting it, a sound broke its way out of you.

You did your best not to give in to the rest of his harsh and aggressive kisses down your neck. After a week of downtime, he was making up for it in marking your neck as his own. Nobody was going to know who the perpetrator of the hickeys were later (other than the upset staff), but it was the idea that mattered.

There were bigger problems actively stealing your attention. Namely, the small amount of friction made with him moving ever-so-slightly between your legs. It was easy to ignore at first, but the neck kisses were causing the pleasure parts of your brain to kick into high gear.

With one harsher movement than the rest, you were unable to bite back a small, unfiltered sound that escaped you. Chan broke contact with your red and bruising skin to look up with a grin on his face.

"What was that, love?" Chan's tone was starkly different than before, far more teasing and with a dark edge to his voice that you only recognized coming out in bed.

Attempts to take his attention off of it failed and you were forced to fess up in the moment. "You have to stop moving like that, it's driving me crazy."

"Moving like what?" Chan shifted his legs, slotting his thigh directly between yours and pressing firmly against you. This elicited a frustrated sigh, the feeling too strong to push away.

Upon no immediate response, Chan pushed his thigh forward and forced a fuller, more in-tact moan out of you. "Fine, fine- that. Putting your thigh between my legs. That's the thing that's driving me crazy."

"There you go," Chan's words were sickly doting in a way that made you break at the seams, "What do you want instead?"

With his thigh slotted firmly between your own, finding coherent strings of words was difficult. "Just.. get this underwear off me and use your fingers instead."

Chan smiled, clearly pleased with your answer. He moved his leg out from between yours, relieving the pressure and allowing you to breathe. He sat back on his legs as he removed the last layer of clothing from below your waist, tossing it to the growing pile on the floor.

He nudged himself closer, Chan's hand finding its way to where his thigh was once situated before. His middle finger teased you with a circular motion around your entrance, so close to where you needed it most.

"Chan." You demanded, shooting him a glare.

"Okay, okay. Just admiring how worked up I've got you," Chan smirked before his finger pushed inside, slowly filling you up and drawing out a long sigh. He worked slowly yet decisively, knowing exactly how you like it.

That was one of the things you loved about Chan: he knew your body like the back of his hand. Where you were most sensitive, what drove you wild, how rough you liked him to get. He could push your buttons perfectly, string you up in his words until you were tied up into a nice present for him.

Before you could process the first, Chan had already added a second finger and was growing more confident. He worked his fingers in and out in a steady rhythm, not slow enough to leave you wanting more nor fast enough to want to slow down.

"That good, baby?" Chan's eyes met yours, and you saw a different side of him for a moment. The way he sought your approval and made sure everything was right had your heart melting. He had confidence in his abilities, but occasionally needed reassurance.

You nodded eagerly, on the cusp of desperation. "It's good, Channie, you're doing so good," You said between soft moans as his fingers pumped deep, feeling him tease a third and giving him a nod.

The third was always a stretch that had you biting back whines in conjunction to moans, but the feeling was too good to beat. The feeling of being full, on his fingers or otherwise, was what drove you wild.

He kissed you once more, slow and tender as his fingers continued to work. It was hard to keep properly connected, devolving into moaning against his lips with small kisses in between.

"Chris," You said, "Can't wait any longer. Need to have you inside, baby."

Instead of his usual entourage of teasing questions, Chan nodded. He made quick work of his boxers, tossing them haphazardly towards the pile as he moved back to you. He was painfully hard, already leaky and worked up.

"Can I?" He looked down for your reassurance, which came with a nod as he lined himself up. His hips moved forward slowly, feeling him filling you up more by the second. It always took a second to adjust to the size, catching your breath as he bottomed out and waited for your signal.

When you gave him the go-ahead, Chan couldn't help but begin a slow and steady pace. He knew better than to go fast right off the bat- he was a lot to handle. But you could hear him whining softly over top of you and knew he was desperate.

Looking up at him, you cupped his face and pulled him in for a quick kiss. "You can go faster, Chris. You won't hurt me."

You heard Chan let out a breathy laugh before his thrusts grew harsher. Instead of the slow, fluid motion of before; he was faster, precise. Every movement had purpose, each angled just right and hitting the sweet spot.

The sudden adjustment had you whining and letting out louder moans, unable to properly cope. It was overwhelming how good he was at it. All you could do was wrap your hands around the back of his shirt and claw at it helplessly as he had his way.

The fabric getting in the way of your fingers on his skin was beginning to frustrate you. "Off," You managed to get out, "Shirt- off."

Chan grinned, sitting up for a moment and slowing down to a snail's pace to pull his black t-shirt over his head and discard it. You reached up, dragging a hand down his chest and over his abs. Every muscle was yours to touch, to claim.

"You like what you see?" Chan said with a laugh.

Deadpanning, you shook your head. "Shut up."

In a second, he was back over top of you and his pace was back with a new force he didn't have before. It was often he was without clothes, but you weren't under the impression a shirt would be the thing holding him back. Either way, you relished in the fact his back was open to you.

Your nails dug in to his tanned skin, dragging along as he fucked into you steadily. You could hear him sucking air in between his teeth followed by his soft moans. He was always one to endure a little pain.

An idea popped into your head when you thought of before, sitting in the chair in his lap. "Chris, stop for a sec." He immediately halted all movements, looking down at you to make sure everything was alright. "Sit normally, facing the booth."

Chan looked at you perplexed for a moment, but pulled away. He did exactly as you told him to, sitting with his legs spread facing the booth he was just sitting in front of not twenty minutes ago. "What are you planning?" He asked.

You sat up and climbed over to him, straddling his waist with your legs and feeling him hard underneath you. "What I wanted to do to you when I was in your lap earlier."

The realization slowly filled his eyes and a knowing smile returned to his face as he sat back, leaning against the black couch cushion behind him. "Go right ahead."

"If you make me do all the work, we're going to have problems," You glared at him as your hand guided his cock, slowly sinking down on it with a sigh.

Chan's large hands wrapped around your waist, slowly guiding you as you moved up and down. Riding wasn't always the easiest job, and it definitely took some getting used to at the start. Your thighs were slowly building up muscle from the practice.

"God, you're so pretty like that," Chan's voice pulled you from your thoughts, looking down at him to see him smiling up at you. His face was pink and he almost had stars in his eyes.

Seeing just how infatuated he was made your heart race and your face flush, almost forgetting to continue to move. "You're pretty, too."

Your hands were situated on his shoulders to keep steady, but one dragged down and you couldn't resist feeling up his chest a bit. Chan looked up at you smirking again. "Do you ever keep your hands off those?"

Snickering, you pushed down a little harder to see him whine and catch his breath before you responded, "If you're going to keep your clothes off all the time, I'm going to feel up the assets you work so hard on."

"Why do you insist on teasing me all the time? You know what happens when you do that," Chan had a dark look in his eyes that you knew far too well.

Shrugging, you moved your hand up to run through his hair. "Did you ever consider I might like what happens when I tease you?"

"So be it."

Without hesitation, you felt Chan's grip around your waist suddenly tighten. You leaned forward instinctively, both of your hands secured around his shoulders.

He began to thrust up into erratically, fast and without caution or precision. The sound of your skin connecting was obscene, thanking the amount of soundproofing around you as a chorus of moans spilled out of you. Every movement had him deep inside you as you attempted to roll your hips along with him.

"Fuck, Chris," You whined, his pace unrelenting and seeming like he wasn't going to let up any time soon, "Close."

There was a distinctive feeling growing, one you knew too well. The amount of pleasure from every movement was rapidly growing as your body was being overwhelmed. Chan heard you, but didn't stop for a moment. It was almost if it was a sign for him to fuck you faster.

Either way, you were tipping over the edge before you had time to process it, spasming around him as you let you a whorish moan. He slowed down, letting you ride out the high. "That's it, baby," He coaxed, "You got it."

Just as you settled down, you felt him start to work himself into a moderate pace again. Your legs felt shot from your energy levels dipping so you asked, "Do you want to me to move, baby? I don't think I have much in me to keep going right here."

"If it's not comfortable to be right there, of course we can move," Chan said with a smile as he allowed you to reposition to pretty much the same spot you were in before. You laid on your back, Chan coming back over top of you. "That better?"

"Much better," You said with a nod as he went back to the pace he had set before. It wasn't as rough as before your orgasm, but steady enough to keep you whining and your brain somewhat fogged up from the constant pleasure.

Meanwhile, you could see Chan was already getting worked up. His face was redder than usual, his eyes trained on one spot, breathing hard as he kept the effort going to thrust his hips in one continuous pace.

His deep groans and whines had begun to turn into full-fledged moans and swears under his breath. His hands eagerly gripped and kneaded at your waist, seeming like he might accidentally bruise the skin. You were about to open your mouth when he said something.

"Honey, I-" Chan was cut off by his own faltered moan, "I'm close, so fucking close."

You pulled him down to kiss him briefly, keeping his face inches from yours as he continued to erratically thrust. "You don't have to wait, cum for me."

Chan nodded vigorously, his hips snapping back and forth at a speed that had you holding onto the couch for dear life, hearing him let out strained moans and teary-eyed cries as he climbed closer and closer to the top.

All of the sudden, he pushed deep inside you, letting out a gasp and a whine as you felt him come deep inside. His hips stuttered as he slowly rocked them, riding out the high. "Oh my god, that.. that was amazing."

Allowing him a moment to catch his breath, you smiled up at him and gave him another quick kiss. "I've missed you, Chris. I've missed this," You admitted after another silent pause.

Chan nodded, pressing his forehead against yours and sighed. He had finally mellowed out, still buried deep. "I've missed you, too. I'm sorry I haven't been able to do this with you and.. be a good boyfriend."

"No, you're okay. I know how much work matters to you and getting things right means that you see that success you've always wanted. I just always miss you in the times you're working, even if I'm in the same room as you."

"I just feel bad when you're here til way too late at night. Speaking of, what time is it?" Chan slowly pulled out, leaving his mess inside you as he quickly grabbed his phone from the floor, "Oh my god. It's half past four."

Your jaw dropped, standing up quickly as Chan hurried around the room to find something to help you clean up. He settled for his own black t-shirt, telling you he'd just go home shirtless if he had to. Of course it looked terribly stained when you had wiped yourself down, sighing while knowing it probably cost a crazy amount.

Digging through a closet, you found one of Chan's old jacket. Chan was standing shirtless and pacing with the rest of his own clothes on, the defiled shirt balled up in his hand.

"Channie, guess what I found?" You asked with a grin, hiding the jacket behind your back.

Chan looked at you with a nervous smile. "Is it something good? I'm just not super stoked to walk home shirtless at four in the morning.."

You tossed the jacket to him, Chan opting to drop the shirt in his hand before he caught it to not get the filth on it. He happily slid it over his shoulders and zipped it up all the way, picking up the soiled shirt once more.

"Shall we go?" Chan said as he double-checked his pockets and walked towards the studio door.

"We shall."

hide and seek

summary: your best friend chan finds you've been fantasizing about him and decides to turn those ideas into reality... pairing: chan x reader genre: smut, best friends to ??? warnings: *cracks knuckles* cnc/primal play, wolf/bunny roleplay, mention of safewords, traffic lights system (yellow used), hide and seek, mentions of pee, chasing scenario, blowjob mouthfucking, hair-grabbing, degradation, leg cramping, knees hurting, kinda realistic, unprotected sex, missionary but he holds reader down, pet names, daddy kink (like once), breeding kink, creampie, aftercare, discussion of future scenario 👀 author's note: this will be the first part in a series, i haven't decided yet how many parts, maybe three? stay tuned if you're interested 🤍 part two & part three word count: 2.5k

Chan simply asks you if he can use your laptop while you’re having a shower since his battery died and he really needs to check something work-related real quick. After doing so, he can’t help but notice the recently opened pages. He doesn’t mean to pry, really. But it’s right there. And a quick look into his best friend’s mind couldn’t hurt…could it?

He is immediately captivated by this story you’ve apparently written and keep hidden in the drafts of your blog. It’s so…sexy and unlike anything you’ve ever talked to him about.

“Dumb little bunny, thinking you can get away from me,” the big bad wolf growls in the bunny’s ear.

The bunny whimpers helplessly, trying to escape the wolf’s strong grasp but to no avail.

The wolf takes the bunny from behind mercilessly, biting her neck and using her to please his needs...

What comes at the end of the story is what shocks him the most.

“Chris, please…”

Huh? Which Chris? Chris Evans? Or maybe Hemsworth? As far as he remembers, you have always been more of a Sebastian Stan and Tom Hiddleston kinda girl but…people change, he supposes.

Until it hit him. His name is also Chris! And people do compare him to a wolf…But no, it couldn’t be…There is no way his best friend is writing stories fantasizing about him.

Unless…

He can’t imagine going on with his life without knowing the answer. So, Chan waits impatiently until you are done with your shower.

“Everything good with your work thing?” you ask him calmly once you return to your room.

“Yeah, all is good. But I found something way more interesting on your laptop,” Chan blurts out meaningfully.

The expression on your face is enough of an answer. You look completely mortified, like a true bunny that is waiting to be devoured.

“I forgot to clear my history, didn’t I?” you murmur even though you already know what Chan has seen.

“That story wasn’t about Chris Evans, was it?” Chan wants to know though he suspects what the truth is.

You immediately drop to your knees in front of him, which takes him by surprise. Gripping his hand tightly, you look so cute and pitiful. He wants to ruin you. Wait, when did those feelings show up?

“I know it was wrong, Channie, believe me. But I just couldn’t help myself, okay? Nothing else helps me get off but this fantasy. I promise I won’t do it again, please don’t end our friendship! You mean the world to me, I’m so so sorry!”

“End our friendship?” he is completely stunned by your train of thought. “Why would I? I mean, you never meant for me to see it, so I think it’s okay to have certain…fantasies. But now that I did see it, I can’t stop thinking about it.”

“We don’t have to talk about it, if it makes you uncomfortable,” you suggest.

“You’re right, we don’t have to talk about it. But how about I make those scenarios come to life?”

“Huh? You want to what now?” you can’t believe what you’re hearing.

“It can’t be satisfying, dealing with all these frustrations by yourself.”

“It really isn’t…” you confess.

“Then, let me take care of you. That’s what friends are for, right?” Chan chuckles.

“Let me get this straight, you wanna re-enact my freaky fantasies while still staying friends?”

“Um, sure, why not?”

You would be a fool to agree. This could mess up everything. But you would be an even bigger fool to reject his tempting offer.

“I’m in.”

“Great! Then, should we discuss boundaries and safewords and stuff?”

“No boundaries, no safewords, you can do whatever you like to me, I don’t care.”

“This isn’t right. What if I want to use a safeword?”

Oh. That thought never crossed your mind but perhaps it should have.

“How about this…if I want a scene to end, I’ll say red. I know you said you don’t need one, but just in case, feel free to use it. If we want to just pause for a bit, then yellow. Green is good to go. Am I clear?”

“Yes, sir. I mean, Chan. I mean, uhhh…do you want me call you something specific?”

“Whatever you like, babygirl,” he reassures you and pats your cheek. “Do you want to give this a try rightaway? Unless you’ve got other plans…”

“No way, let’s do this!” you practically jump at the opportunity.

“Alright. I’ll give you one minute to hide anywhere in this house. After that, I can do whatever I like to you.”

His words make you so thrilled that your heart threatens to escape from your chest because it’s beating louder than ever.

“If you find me,” you tease.

“Oh, I will,” Chan swears. “Now, run.”

You sprint out of your room and down the stairs, as he starts the countdown.

“Sixty…fifty-nine…”

Where should you hide? The living room doesn’t have any good hiding spots and neither does the kitchen. Under the table is too obvious. Your room would have been a good option but Chan is currently there, so it’s out of the question. The bathroom is right next to it, so once again, not a great idea. Then, it hits you. The basement! You don’t remember ever showing it to Chan so it will take him more time to think of it. You go through the door and run down another set of stairs leading to the basement. You see the perfect spot. A vintage wooden chest that just happens to be empty and is big enough to fit you if you squeeze in.

Okay, maybe not comfortable but you can survive in there for a couple of minutes. Once you’ve tucked yourself inside and closed the lid, you are suddenly hoping that Chan finds you quickly. Whatever he does to you can’t be worse than this tiny space. You didn’t know you had claustrophobia but in this very moment, you do. You can’t hear him from down here so you imagine he is looking through the other rooms first. After what feels like eternity, you finally hear steps. You are grateful that you recently peed before getting in the shower because the current situation would have undoubtedly made you wet your pants. As the steps approach, you begin to worry. What if it isn’t Chan? What if you’d forgotten to lock the door and now a complete stranger comes in to take advantage of you? No, these thoughts are irrational and make you want to use the bathroom. Ugh.

“I’ll give you ten seconds to come out and I’ll go easy on you.”

Chan’s voice both comforts you and freaks you out even more. You’re not coming out, alright. This spot was great! He can do whatever he wants to you.

“Three…two…one,” Chan finishes counting and opens the chest’s lid.

You look up at him, eyes blinking to adjust to the light. He pulls you out of it roughly.

“Last chance. Run.”

But then, you realize you were squeezed into that tiny space for so long that your leg had cramped up. You can’t possibly run right now.

“Um, sorry but yellow,” you feel like an idiot. You had said you don’t need a safeword and yet…

“What’s wrong?” Chan’s threatening gaze immediately softens and he rubs your elbow gently.

“I didn’t think I’d get a leg cramp in this freaking box,” you admit, ashamed of yourself as you shake your legs in an attempt to relax muscles.

“Oh, sweetheart,” Chan coos at you and helps you massage your leg. “Wanna call it a day?”

“Hell nah. Just, no more running, please.”

“Sure, that’s fine by me.”

“Sorry for ruining the mood.”

Chan shakes his head.

“You could never.”

“Okay, I think I’m good now,” you assure him.

“Scene?”

“Scene.”

“Did you really think you can escape me? Dumb little bunny…” Chan tsks at you and you feel your knees giving out. You need him so bad it’s not even funny anymore.

“Please, don’t hurt me, Mr. Wolf,” you plead with him even though every cell in your being would be glad to be on the receiving end of his anger.

“Oh, but where’s the fun in that? You should’ve locked your door to keep me out.”

If you tell him that you want him inside would it be too out of character for a scared bunny?

“I’ll do anything,” you promise crying. “I won’t tell a soul.”

“You’ll do anything regardless,” Chan smirks devilishly and grabs your hair harshly, pushing you to your knees. With his free hand, he unbuttons and unzips his jeans, wasting no time in pulling his cock out of his confines and stuffing your mouth full.

Fuck, your knees already hurt, probably because of that stupid chest but you choose to ignore the discomfort for now because this feeling of being dominated like that is too good to let go of.

“That’s it, take it like the useless cumslut you are,” Chan speaks degradingly but you’ve never been wetter before.

You wish you could say you are doing your best to give him a blowjob but the truth is you are not doing much, his hips thrusting forward aggressively, his hands gripping your hair. Your mouth is nothing but a cumdump for him. Your eyes are watering, vision is blurred. Your throat hurts too but it is nothing compared to the burning feeling in your knee. It is in that moment you realize that you didn’t discuss a signal for a situation where you can’t speak. You rack your brain for an alternative and remember that some subs opt for pinching their dom’s skin in an attempt to communicate discomfort. You really don’t want this to end but…

As you are overthinking this, you realize Chan’s already released his seed inside of your mouth and you are left with no choice but to swallow it up like the greedy cumwhore you are. Only for him, though.

His cock softens in his mouth but he doesn’t immediately pull out and only then, do you remember what you’ve been about to do.

You pinch his thigh lightly, looking up with moist, pleading eyes.

“What is it, darling?” Chan needs to know, taking a step back.

“Help me stand, please,” your voice is hoarse.

“Did I hurt you?” he asks as he grips your hands and leads you to sit for a while on the stupid chest responsible for your current pain. Okay, maybe, you brought this upon yourself but whatever.

“No, you were perfect, it’s just that my knees hurt. Fucking dumb wooden thing,” you grunt in frustration, punching it with your tiny fist.

Chan chuckles and strokes your hair comfortingly in complete contrast to how he was pulling it mere seconds ago. Then, he pulls you into his arms for a sweet hug.

“Sorry…I’m killing the mood again, aren’t I?” you pout.

“Not at all. Remember you’re in charge of whatever happens between us. You wanna pause, we pause. You wanna stop, we stop. I would hate myself if this doesn’t feel as good for you as it does for me.

“You feel good?”

“Are you kidding? Do you think I’d offer just anyone to fulfil their fantasies hidden in their drafts?” Chan laughs fondly.

“I’m glad you think so,” you smile at him gratefully. “I’m better now so if you’re still on board, we can continue.”

“I’m on board but let me come up with a new plan. I was thinking of fucking you doggy style but now that’s out of the question with your knee situation.”

Hearing him speak out loud what he was planning to do to you sends shivers down your spine. Damn it, maybe you should have just hidden under the table.

“How do you feel about missionary?” Chan inquires.

“Wouldn’t it be too intimate for the kind of scenario we’re doing?” you are doubtful.

“Not if I hold you down,” Chan murmurs smugly.

“Oh. Well, then…like I said, you can do whatever you like.”

“Action?”

“Action,” you confirm.

Chan wastes no time in pulling you up from your sitting position and pushing you down on the cold floor. He’s holding your wrists with one hand and undressing you with the other. Scratch that. He’s tearing your dress apart. It was never one of your faves.

“W-what are you d-doing?” you mewl at him.

“Shut the fuck up,” Chan commands.

He doesn’t bother with stretching you out because he sees you’re already soaking wet for him. Instead, he forces his thick cock inside of your tiny pussy.

Only this time, your screams are real and you’re not at all pretending.

“T-too b-big, it h-hurts,” you cry out.

“You can take it, bunny,” Chan says confidently.

You know that you can put an end to this with one simple word but damn, does it feel incredible to be stuffed full by your best friend’s large manhood.

“Shh,” he whispers in your ear. “This’ll feel so much better if you relax f’me.”

You’re trying, really. But it’s too much you feel like he’ll split you in half. Okay, maybe not a bad way to go but still.

“D-daddy, it h-hurts so m-much,” you slur mindlessly.

Wait, what did you just say?

“Daddy, huh? Easy, babybun, your wolf dad’s gonna take good care of you, I promise,” Chan’s words send you into overdrive and you come around his cock, your thighs are shaking and you’re arching your back. You can’t think anymore, you just need to be with him stuck in this moment forever. Soon enough, he releases his cum inside of your pussy.

You want to beg him to stay there for a while but you are too weak to speak.

Instead, Chan uses his fingers to push back the cum inside of your tiny pussy.

“Gotta make it stick. Will my bunny have my wolf puppies, huh?”

Oh? So, he’s that kind of guy. Well, you can’t say you mind...Besides, you’ve talked about this before and you’re on the pill so whatever he says is just for the sake of the scenario. Right?

“Was this okay?” Chan intends to find out and judging by his soft tone that is just begging to be praised you can tell that the scene is over.

“You did amazing, Chris,” you sigh wistfully and kiss his cheek.

“Better than your fantasies?”

“You have no idea.”

“So…when can we do something like this again?”

“Gee, let me have some water, at least,” you joke but your best friend (?) takes it literally and scoops you up in his arms, heading towards the stairs.

“Wait, where are we going?”

“To get you water, of course. And have a bath. And then to bed.”

Fuck. Maybe staying friends will be more complicated than you initially thought.

Once you’ve both been hydrated, washed up and dried out, you are cuddled in your bed, sharing snacks.

“Do you want to try something more extreme next week?” Chan asks casually. As if what you just did wasn’t already pretty intense.

“Um, sure? What exactly did you have in mind?”

“Kind of an outside setting. It will take some planning to make sure there aren’t other people but…it just came to mind while we were in the basement.”

“Tell me more about it,” you blink curioisly and put your hand on top of his.”

“So…how do you feel about being chased in a forest?”

To be continued…

Ahhh it's so good!!!

Your Gentle Hands (They Feel Like Home To Me). || Kim Hongjoong. [ Part I ]

Summary: meeting the local outcast shouldn't have ended with you slowly falling for him. yet you did, all while knowing you could never have this man, because you were already someones else's wife. two lovers, a dress shop, and a violent man between it all. we all know how this ends, right? ... right?

Pairing: dressmaker!kim hongjoong x fem. reader

Genre: angst, fluff

Wordcount: 15k

Warnings: playing in the 1800s so general warning for that, reader is married to a very violent man, emotional (justified) infidelity??, misogyny, (domestic) violence, injuries, talks about religion and people suffering because of it, blood, murder, i think that's it??

A/N: can't believe it's finally here. oh my gawd. i love this piece so much, but god did i struggle with it i'm so glad i can finally post part 1. i would really really appreciate reblogs, comments, and likes too, but reblogs are so helpful, so please do it if you liked it it would help me immensely. also comment if anyone would like to be tagged for part 2 of this two-shot! and now onto the most important part: the biggest thanks and hugs and kisses to @yessa-vie and @ghstzzn because without them, this fic would've long been in the damn trash can holy moly. also, thank you so so much to @seulrinnie-rinrin for beating this last minute, i'm so thankful really!! and as always divider credits to @firefly-graphics!

Taglist: @ghstzzn, @kyukyustar, @hwapetals, @foxinnie8, @preciouswoozi, @aussiekpopginger, @kitten4sannie

Available here on AO3.

My Dearest Husband,

The years have been harsh to us, and the cracks in our marriage grow wider with each passing day. Your hands, once embracing me so gentle and loving, now leave bruises upon my skin that no amount of powder or paint can conceal.

I dare not speak of the pain that lingers within me, for fear of invoking your wrath once more. Yet, the time has come for me to break the chains that bind me to this wretched existence and find solace in the arms of another.

Know this, my dear husband, I shall not suffer in silence any longer. Your tyranny shall not be tolerated, and I shall not rest until I am free from the shackles of your oppression.

With every ounce of strength left within me,

[Your Name]

The clock turned midnight.

You sat by the window, the gentle patter of rain against the glass a soothing backdrop to the turmoil raging within your heart. The room felt suffocating, the walls seemingly closing in on you with each passing moment. How long has it been since you last felt a glimmer of hope in this house?

How long has it been since you last felt safe in it?

You closed your eyes. Nothing but silence greeted you.

Good. 

The creak of the floorboards beneath your feet sounded deafening in the silence of the night, and you held your breath, afraid that even the slightest noise would awaken him.

Him.

Your husband, or rather: your own personal tormentor. 

“He's a good man,” your mother in law screamed, her fingernails marking your skin, her eyes desperate and angry. “Be a good wife and learn to obey and endure. My son said it was a mistake, and so be it!”

The black eye he gave you days later told a different story. Yet it didn't matter.

Once outside, you found yourself drawn to the familiar path that led to the edge of the forest. 

Finally stepping outside the small, scruffy looking house, you were greeted by darkness and the occasional chirping of various insects. Luckily, the temperatures were still mild in late September, yet you still pulled the cardigan tighter around you. Despite the darkness and uncertainty that surrounded you, there was a sense of freedom in being away from the suffocating confines of your home.

Just for a little, a few hours, both your mind and body could finally relax.

As you made your way along the familiar path towards the edge of the forest, a sense of anticipation bubbled within you. For the first time in what felt like an eternity, you allowed yourself to entertain the possibility of a bit of time free from fear and pain. It would only last a short while, making you lose valuable hours of sleep, but still for you, it was enough.

The path before you seemed to stretch on endlessly, disappearing into the darkness of the woods. Tall, gnarled trees loomed overhead, their branches reaching out like skeletal fingers towards the heavens. The soft rustle of leaves in the gentle breeze filled the air, accompanied by the occasional hoot of an owl or the distant cry of a night bird.

The chirping at the insects had stopped entirely.

Despite the late hour, the forest was buzzing with activity. Small creatures - stray cats and dogs known to frequent the area - scurried among the underbrush, their eyes glowing in the darkness as they went about their nocturnal rituals. Every now and then, the faint glimmer of fireflies could be seen darting through the trees, their soft, golden light illuminating the path ahead.

You followed their lead, heart pounding in your chest as you ventured deeper into the forest. For a split second, your mind wandered back to your husband. You knew he was asleep, passed out blank from the amount of alcohol he consumed at The Saloon, the only pub in your village.

Despite knowing he was asleep, the fear lingered like a dark cloud looming over your every thought. The bruises on your skin served as a constant reminder of his violence, and even in his absence, his presence felt suffocating.

“Meow.”

The sound broke the silence of the night, startling you momentarily, making you almost trip over your own feet. Your heart raced as you glanced around, half expecting to see your husband's shadow looming in the darkness. But there was no sign of him, only the gentle rustle of leaves and the occasional chirp of insects.

He's not here, you reminded yourself, taking a deep, slow breath, it's just a cat. It's okay. You're okay. 

As you stood there, trying to calm your racing heart, the source of the meow emerged from the bushes - a small, scruffy-looking cat with fur as dark as the night itself. 

It's a beautiful cat, you thought.

You crouched down, extending a tentative hand towards the cat. “Hey there, little one,” you murmured softly, your voice barely above a whisper. “Are you out here all alone?”

The cat looked you up and down for a moment, then cautiously approached, its movements slow and careful at first. It sniffed your outstretched hand, then rubbed its head against your fingers, purring softly.

A small smile tugged at the corners of your lips as you gently scratched behind the cat's ears.

“Looks like we're both seeking some peace in the night,” you said, your words more for yourself than for the cat. But in that moment, it felt like the cat understood, as if it were offering you silent companionship in this dark, lonely forest.

With a sigh, you leaned back against a nearby tree, the cat following and curling up beside you. 

“I should give you a name, right?” you hummed. The cat didn't respond, just continued purring as your fingers went through its unkempt yet soft fur.

“I have the gut feeling that you're a boy, so… let's name you Benji, shall we?”

You giggled as Benji took your hand in his paws, gently biting and licking while his purring filled your ears. 

“You like it? What a good, sweet boy.”

Suddenly, a rustling in the bushes nearby startled you, tearing your gaze away from Benji. The cat hissed, and only then you saw what was making the noise: a… goat? 

A goat that was now sprinting right at you at full speed. Panicked, you hurried to your feet, backing away slowly only to be met by the tree you previously set by. You turned around to run, but as you did, the goat lunged forward, catching your dress with its horns and tearing the fabric apart. A loud scream - your loud scream - echoed through the night, and you fell to the ground, your knees and hands immediately starting to bleed as they hit the forest floor. 

“Help!” you screamed, your voice barely audible over the pounding of your heart and the goat's relentless assault. In a desperate attempt to escape, you scrambled away, your hands and knees scraping against the rough ground once again, blood mingling with dirt as you crawled towards another tree, away from the animal. “Somebody, please help me!”

Your desperate cries pierced through the darkness. Every fibre of your being screamed for someone to hear your plea and rescue you from this nightmare.

And then, as if conjured by your sheer desperation, a male voice cut through the night. 

“Let her be, you damn goat!” 

Oh finally.

You turned towards the source of the voice, your heart pounding in your chest as you beheld the figure emerging from the shadows. In the darkness, you couldn't see his features clearly, but the silhouette of a lean figure emerged from the shadows. His stature was not imposing, but there was a quiet strength in the way he carried himself. Short, tousled hair framed his face, and his clean-shaven jawline hinted at a youthful charm. Despite his lean frame, there was a sense of agility and grace in his movements as he approached, his steps purposeful yet cautious. His clothes, though worn and faded, spoke of practicality rather than luxury, and the faint glint of silver caught your eye as moonlight danced upon a necklace around his neck.

“Get back, Django,” he commanded, his voice stern and serious. 

For a moment, it seemed as though the goat - Django - hesitated, its wild eyes darting between you and the stranger as if weighing its options. But then, with a defiant snort, the goat actually backed away, its hooves scraping against the forest floor as it retreated back to its owner's side.

You watched in stunned silence as the young man approached, his expression softened by a glimmer of concern. “Are you alright?” he asked, his voice gentler now.

You nodded weakly, your body trembling with a mixture of fear and relief as you struggled to sit up. He offered you a hand, and you accepted it gratefully, allowing him to help you to your feet. “Thank you,” you murmured, your voice barely above a whisper as you met his gaze.

Your eyes widened. 

You knew this man. 

It was hard not to, because the women at the market loved to gossip about him.

“He's a filthy man. Have you seen the dresses he makes? Outrageous.”

His name was Kim Hongjoong, you believed, a man known for his unconventional ways and said ‘outrageous’ dresses he crafted.

The women's cruel words towards him echoed in your mind, their voices dripping with disgust whenever his name was mentioned. They spoke of him as if he were beneath them, a plague, to be avoided at all costs. But as you looked at him now, you saw none of the malice they spoke of, only kindness and a smile etched into his features.

Hongjoong's eyes softened at your words. He had a pretty face, you realised, staring up at him in awe and curiosity.

You are a married woman! Oh Lord, may you save me from those malicious, evil thoughts!

“You shouldn't be out here alone,” he said, his voice tinged with concern. 

“I'm always here alone,” you responded. “It's my safe space.”

Instead of pressing you further, his eyes scanned your form, his expression growing more serious as he took in the extent of both your wounds and torn dress.

“It's even worse than I thought…” He looked at Django, who's now freely roaming around, seemingly no longer agitated and angry. “This goddamn goat,” he groaned.

“Is he always like this?” you asked.

Hongjoong sighed, running a hand through his tousled hair as he glanced back at Django with a mixture of frustration and resignation. “Unfortunately, yes,” he replied, “He's a stubborn creature, to say the least. His former owner wanted to slaughter him because he was aggressive towards humans and goats alike, but I convinced him to let me take care of him instead.”

“That's very noble of you,” you remarked, a sense of admiration evident in your voice. “Not many would take in a troubled animal like Django and give him a chance to change.”

Hongjoong offered you a small, appreciative smile, his eyes reflecting a hint of pride. “It hasn't been easy,” he admitted, patting Django's head, “But despite a few angry outbursts here and there, he's actually been adjusting well.”

You hummed, still keeping your distance from the goat that just attacked you. You and him probably won't become friends any time soon.

“Do you think you are able to walk?”

You nodded, though the pain throbbing in your knees and hands contradict your words. “I'll be fine,” you assured him, though your voice faltered slightly as you spoke.

Hongjoong's gaze softened with concern as he observed your state, his brows furrowing slightly with worry. “Are you sure?” he asked, his tone gentle yet insistent. “You're hurt, and it's not safe for you to be out here alone, especially with those injuries.”

You hesitated. Despite your initial plan to find solace and peace in the forest, you couldn't deny the reality of your situation - bruised, bleeding, and very much in need of assistance.

Swallowing your pride, you met Hongjoong's gaze with a grateful nod. “I... I think I could use some help,” you admitted, your voice wavering slightly with a mixture of exhaustion and relief.

Without hesitation, Hongjoong stepped closer, offering you his arm for support. “Here," he said, “Lean on me. We'll get you patched up and back home safely.”

“N-no!” you screeched, making Hongjoong falter in his steps and shoot you a confused look, “I-i mean, the night's still young, am I right? There's no need to return home just yet…”

“Why are you avoiding your own home?”

Your heart raced at his question, and you could feel your pulse pounding in your ears. His straightforwardness caught you off-guard, yet you tried - and failed - to hide your uneasiness and upcoming fear.

“You wouldn't understand,” you whispered.

Avoiding his eyes, you bit your lip, unsure of how to respond. The fear of revealing too much, of exposing the dark secrets of your marriage, held you back. You couldn't bear the thought of anyone knowing the truth, let alone a stranger who could very much use this information against you.

Hongjoong must have sensed your hesitation, for he didn't press further. Instead, he offered a gentle smile, his eyes filled with understanding. “It's alright,” he said softly. “You don't have to explain. Let's just get you somewhere safe and comfortable for now.”

His words and tone surprised you. You were accustomed to being met with demands and anger, not patience and empathy. The contrast left you feeling both confused and intrigued. Why was he being so kind to you? What did he hope to gain from helping a stranger in the middle of the night?

You accepted his support, leaning on him as you walked, your steps slow and cautious. The pain in your knees and hands was a constant reminder of your current vulnerability, but Hongjoong's steady presence provided a strange sense of comfort. Despite your initial wariness, you found yourself beginning to trust him.

Oh, what a foolish woman you are.

“Where will you take me?”

“To my house. It would be a shame if your husband would see you like this, with visible injuries and a torn dress, wouldn't it?”

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

That's how long you stared into his eyes, and he stared into yours.

Both of you knew what this meant.

Yet no one spoke it out loud. Society forbade it. 

You exhaled a trembling breath, the truth of his words settling heavily between you. “Yes,” you whispered, your voice barely audible, “It would be a shame.”

Hongjoong’s eyes softened, as if he could read the unspoken pain behind your words. “Let’s go, then,” he said gently, guiding you along the path with Django following closely behind.

“You know,” you whispered, “a married woman should never visit a bachelor's property alone. Especially at such late hours.”

Hongjoong glanced at you, a faint, yet boyish smile playing on his lips. “If you go by the rules of society, then yes,” he said, “but I'm known to do the exact opposite.”

Hongjoong's house came into view after a short walk through the forest. It was a modest building outside the small village, yet it looked charming, nestled amid tall trees that swayed gently in the night breeze. The front was adorned with a small, covered porch, where a couple of wooden chairs and a table sat invitingly. Ivy climbed up the walls, giving the house an almost fairytale-like quality.

It seemed to be well kept too, a stark contrast to your own home.

As you approached, you noticed the sign above the door, “Kim’s Dressmaking,” written in elegant, swirling letters. It was clear that the front of the house doubled as a shop. The large windows displayed a variety of dresses, each more beautiful and intricate than the last, their fabrics shimmering softly in the dim light. 

You remembered the villager's harsh words, and for a small second you thought: should you really follow this unruly man? What if anyone would see you entering his house at night, completely alone?

But you also knew this was quite literally the only solution right now, because if your husband saw you at home tending to your wounds he'd know of your nightly trips, and you couldn't let that happen.

So, the outcast’s house it was.

Hongjoong, who just escorted Django back to a small stall behind the property, passed you and pushed open the door, the bell above it tinkling softly. The interior of the shop was a burst of colour and creativity. Dresses of all styles and fabrics lined the walls, hung from mannequins, and lay draped over chairs and tables. Ribbons, lace, and beads were strewn about in an organised chaos that spoke of hours of dedicated craftsmanship. The scent of fresh fabric and a hint of lavender lingered in the air.

These dresses were made for royalty, beautiful and extravagant, unlike anything normal citizens would wear. You pitied Hongjoong; his talent was being wasted in a small village, while queens and princesses should be the ones wearing them, not women talking badly about his craft the second he turned his back on them.

“Welcome to my workshop,” Hongjoong said, a note of pride in his voice. He led you through the shop and towards a door at the back. “The living area is just through here.”

You followed him into a cozy living space that was a stark contrast to the bustling shop. The room was warmly lit by a few oil lamps, casting a soft glow over the rustic wooden furniture. A large, comfortable-looking sofa took up most of one wall, with a knitted blanket draped over it. Shelves lined with books and trinkets filled another wall, and a small fireplace crackled with a gentle fire, providing a soothing warmth. A modest kitchen area occupied one corner, with a wooden table and two chairs positioned nearby.

“Sit,” Hongjoong instructed gently, guiding you to the sofa. “I'll get some water and bandages for your wounds.”

“Yes, sir,” you giggled, a childlike euphoria suddenly overcoming you. He shot you a grin in response.

You sank into the sofa, the softness a welcome relief after the night's ordeal. You watched as Hongjoong moved around in the kitchen, his movements swift and efficient.

After a few minutes, he returned with a bowl of warm water, a clean cloth, and a small box of medical supplies. He knelt beside you, his eyes focused and serious as he gently took your hands in his.

“This might sting a bit,” he warned, dipping the cloth into the water and carefully cleaning the dirt and blood from your scrapes. His touch was surprisingly gentle, and you found yourself relaxing under his care.

“Thank you,” you murmured, watching him work. The tenderness in his actions was a stark contrast to the harshness you had endured at home.

“You're welcome,” he replied softly, his eyes meeting yours briefly before returning to his task. He worked silently for a few moments, cleaning and bandaging your wounds with practised ease.

“Now,” he said, standing up and cleaning his hands with the washcloth, “all we gotta do is fix your dress now to avoid your husband suspecting anything.”

“I… I don't have any money to pay you,” you admitted.

Hongjoong shook his head, a kind smile playing on his lips. "Don't worry about that," he said. “Consider it my way of helping a neighbour in need. I mean, it was my goat who put you in this situation after all.”

The kindness in his words brought tears to your eyes, and you had to look away to hide your emotions. It's been an hour since you've met this man, and yet he already treated you better than people whom you should be closest to. It had been so long since someone had shown you such genuine care and concern.

Hongjoong led you to a small sewing table in the corner of the room, surrounded by bolts of fabric, spools of thread, and an array of needles and scissors. He pulled out a chair for you and you sat down, feeling a sense of peace settle over you.

“Can I ask another favour of you?” you asked quietly.

Hongjoong knelt down, now looking up to you. It made your heart beat faster, and you hated yourself for it.

“Go ahead,” he said, encouraging you to speak.

“Please don't leave any obvious stitches… my husband would notice and then he would get mad and I really don't-” 

“Hey, hey,” Hongjoong shushed you, carefully taking your trembling hand in his own.

His gentle touch seemed to soothe you immediately. 

“I'll give my very best. Your husband won't notice anything amiss,” he promised.

As he worked, carefully mending the torn fabric of your dress, you watched his skilled hands move with precision and grace. His focus was unwavering, and you couldn't help but admire the artistry in his every movement.

“You know,” you said softly, breaking the silence, “the women in the village talk about you. They say your dresses are too extravagant for common folk.”

Hongjoong chuckled, his eyes twinkling with amusement. “I've heard the gossip,” he admitted. “But I don't create these dresses for them. Let's say my clients are of more… different backgrounds.”

“You mean women of wealthier status?”

“Indeed.”

You couldn't help but giggle at Hongjoong's response.

“So does that mean… Did you just… indirectly make fun of those women, Hongjoong?” you asked, trying to stifle your laughter.

A mischievous smile spread across his face as he glanced up at you. “Maybe I did,” he replied, his eyes twinkling with a playful glint. “But it's only fair, don't you think? They judge me without understanding, too.”

You laughed again, the sound feeling foreign yet welcome to your own ears. 

Hongjoong’s returned to his work, his fingers working fast, his concentration unwavering. You watched him in awe. There was something comforting about watching him work, knowing he was doing his best to help you. And on top of that, his skills fascinated you. You didn't know much about the craft of dressmaking, yet even a layin like you knew that true skill was needed for such incredible work.

And Kim Hongjoong definitely had that skill.

“Why do you stay here?” you asked after a moment of silence, curiosity getting the better of you. “You could be making dresses for queens and princesses, living a life far away from all the judgement and poverty of this village.”

Hongjoong paused, his needle stopping mid-air as he looked up at you once again. “I could do that, you're right,” he agreed, “but I prefer living peacefully. Going back to the court… it's not what I want anymore. People there are difficult.”

“More difficult than here?”

He laughed. “Yeah, actually. Just in a different way.”

You hummed. Hongjoong finished mending your dress, carefully examining his work before looking up at you with a satisfied smile. “There,” he said, “all done. Your husband won’t notice a thing.”

You looked down at the dress, marvelling at his skill. The stitches were invisible, the fabric as good as new. “Thank you,” you said, your gratitude heavily evident in your voice.

He stood up, offering you his hand once more. “Let me walk you home,” he said. “It’s not safe for you to go alone.”

Panic rushed through you at his suggestion, your heart pounding in your chest. You jerked back, withdrawing your hand from his as if his touch burned you.

“No,” you said, your voice trembling, “I can't let you do that. What if someone sees us together? What if my husband finds out?”

Hongjoong's brows furrowed in concern. “But it’s not safe for you to walk alone at this hour. After what happened in the forest, I can’t just let you go unaccompanied.”

You shook your head vehemently, your hands clenching the fabric of your freshly mended dress. “I appreciate your kindness, Hongjoong, but you don’t understand. If anyone sees us together, it will only get worse for me. My husband… he's not a kind man. He'll make my life a living hell.”

Hongjoong's expression softened. He reached out as if to comfort you, but then hesitated as you took another step back. “I won’t let anything happen to you, but I understand your fear. At least let me watch and follow you from a distance, to make sure you get home safely.”

You nodded reluctantly. It was late after all, and even though the village was small, you still didn't feel safe walking back alone. “Thank you,” you whispered, your voice barely audible. “Just… Please, be careful.”

Hongjoong gave you a reassuring nod. “I promise. Just stay close to the path, and I’ll make sure you get home safely.” He led you to the door, and as you stepped out into the night, the cool air brushing against your skin, you felt a sudden sadness overcoming you.

You didn't want to leave. Or moreover: you didn't want to go back. Back to him. 

With a final glance back at Hongjoong, you set off down the path, which was the opposite direction of where you first came to his house from the forest. 

The journey felt shorter than you wanted it to be, and before long, the familiar sight of your house came into view. The windows were dark, a sign that your husband was thankfully still asleep. You stopped at the edge of your property, your heart pounding in your chest as you glanced back at the shadowy figure of Hongjoong standing in the distance.

With a final nod and a slight wave, you turned away and walked up to the door. You opened it as quietly as you could, slipping inside and closing it behind you with a soft click. The house was silent, and only the steady ticking of the clock on the wall could be heard. You held your breath, listening for any sign of movement from your husband.

Silence. Good.

Because silence was always better than his usual rage and violence. 

“This is a good night,” you murmured. You quietly moved to the window, trying to see if Hongjoong was still there.

One last time. I gotta see him just one last time. 

But unfortunately, your kind and pretty stranger was no longer there.

The trees seemed to slowly close in around you. 

The forest surrounding you felt alive, watching, waiting.

A shiver ran down your spine as the sound of rustling leaves echoed ominously through the forest.

Just three more steps. One. Two. Three-

“Y/N?”

“Dear God!”

The sudden movement caused the reason you were here today to dart deeper into the underbrush. “Benji!” you called out, frustration now evident in your frantic voice.

Hongjoong stepped closer. “Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. What… are you doing here?”

You sighed. “I'm looking for a little cat. Met the little one last week, shortly before Django attacked me. He was gone afterwards. I've been coming here all week, but it's of no use. Last week he was so trusting, but now… it's so hard to even get close to him.”

The sun was piercing through the trees on this warm Friday evening, and you had to squint your eyes as you looked in the direction Benji ran away. 

“I can't see him anymore,” you said.

Hongjoong’s expression softened. “Do you want some help?” he asked. You nodded, shooting him an appreciative smile. “I’d really like that.”

The two of you moved cautiously, stepping lightly over the forest floor. The silence between you was punctuated only by the occasional crack of a twig or the rustle of leaves.

As you neared the spot where you last saw Benji, Hongjoong held up a hand, signalling for you to stop. He crouched down, peering into the thick bushes.

“There,” he whispered, pointing. “I see him.”

You followed his gaze and spotted the little cat, his eyes wide and alert as he watched you both from the shadows.

“Benji,” you called softly, your voice gentle. “It’s okay, buddy. We’re here to help you.”

Slowly, painstakingly, Benji inched closer, drawn by the sound of your voice. You took a tentative step forward, trying to maintain your balance on the uneven ground. Just as you were about to reach him, your foot slipped into a hidden hole in the forest floor. You stumbled, your ankle twisting painfully as you almost fell.

Behind you, Hongjoong reacted instantly, his strong hand grabbing your arm to steady you. You hissed in pain as his grip tightened around a particularly sore spot.

“Are you okay?” he asked, concern evident in his voice.

You nodded quickly, trying to brush it off. “Yeah, just twisted my ankle a bit.” You chuckled awkwardly. “It's quite funny, isn't it? I always get hurt when we meet.”

But Hongjoong didn’t let go. His eyes narrowed as he noticed the bruises on your arm, previously hidden by your sleeve. “Y/N… what happened?” he asked, his voice a mix of anger and concern.

You swallowed hard, looking away. “It’s nothing. Just an accident at home.”

He shook his head, his grip gentle but firm. “Y/N, don’t lie to me. Was this… your husband?”

You felt tears prickling at the corners of your eyes. “Hongjoong, please. Y-you know I can't talk about it.”

“I know,” he whispered, “But…” 

He didn't continue his sentence. Instead, his eyes found yours, and everything he couldn't say, every single, unspoken emotion you found there, hidden behind those kind, brown orbs. 

And you understood. You understood that if this man had the chance to change your situation, he would do it. Whatever it would take, and all for you. 

A married woman. Practically a stranger still, despite the intimate moment you shared.

In that very moment, you sinned.

And God was your only witness as you fell a little bit for a man that wasn't your husband.

“Meow.”

Benji’s soft meow brought you back to the present. You looked down to see the little cat rubbing against your leg, practically purring his heart out. You reached down, gently scooping the little Grey fur ball up into your arms.

Hongjoong watched you, his expression unreadable to you. “He's still so little. You sure his mother isn't nearby as well?” he asked.

You shook your head. “I've been here to get him every day and haven't seen any other cat here. He seems to be completely alone.”

“Alright then, let’s get him to my home first. We’ll figure something out then.”

You nodded. Without even mentioning, Hongjoong knew you couldn't take him to your own home. 

The path back seemed shorter, perhaps because you weren't alone anymore. Benji fidgeted a lot, but wasn't as much of a trouble as you originally thought. 

When you reached the edge of the forest, the sunlight was brighter, and you could hear the distant sounds of the town.

“I'm glad you don't have any close neighbours.”

“I'm also glad. Because if I did, I wouldn't be able to see you right now Y/N,” he said, and smiled. Oh, that goddamn smile. 

You're not quite sure what it meant, but you felt your heart skip a beat. It was something so beautiful only described in those ‘unholy’ books your mother forbade you to read, but ended up doing anyway. You felt like a young girl again, curious and desperate for love, seeking solace in men that weren't real, but oh so charming.

Men who couldn't hurt you. Couldn't touch any part of your body, only your pure heart.

Yeah, that's how Kim Hongjoong made you feel. With only a smile. 

You felt like you were flying, so free and happy and brave and young again. Like you could conquer the whole world together. 

But Kim Hongjoong wasn't yours. Because in no world could you ever become his.

Stepping foot into his shop was like entering another work, and even though you've already seen his gorgeous dresses, you still looked at them in awe. 

“One day,” you whispered. 

“If you want, you can try a dress on. No one will bother us since the store's closed today.”

You shivered. Hongjoong stood almost right behind you, his warmth radiating off his body.

The temptation to indulge in this small fantasy was strong, but you shook your head. “I couldn’t possibly,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. “I don’t want to impose.”

“You wouldn’t be imposing at all,” Hongjoong replied, his tone gentle yet insistent. “Think of it as a gift. Besides, I could use some help around here.”

Your curiosity piqued and you turned to face him. “Help? With what?”

He gestured to the array of dresses on display. “I’ve been working on some new designs, but I don’t have a proper model to try them on. I use mannequins for display, but it’s not the same. I need someone to see how the dresses move and fit in real life. You can work for me in exchange for taking in Benji. Model my dresses, help me with fittings and adjustments. It’s a fair trade, don’t you think?”

“I'd like that,” you whispered, “it's just… these dresses are made for royalty, not for a woman like… like me, Hongjoong.”

He vehemently shook his head. “You underestimate yourself, Y/N. Just try one on, for me?”

You nodded slowly, and he selected a dress from the rack, a soft, flowing gown in a shade of deep emerald. You took it from him, feeling the weight and texture of the fabric, smooth and luxurious against your skin.

Hongjoong led you to a small changing area behind a curtain. You stepped behind it, your heart pounding. Carefully, you undressed and slipped into the gown. The fabric felt cool and comforting, draping over your body with an unexpected ease. You adjusted the dress, feeling its weight settle around you, and took a deep breath before stepping out.

Hongjoong's reaction was immediate and genuine. His eyes widened, a look of pure admiration spreading across his face. “Y/N,” he breathed, “you look… stunning.”

You blushed, feeling embarrassed yet also undeniably charmed. “I don’t know about that. It feels strange, like I’m pretending to be someone I’m not.”

“You’re not pretending,” he said softly, stepping closer. “This is you, Y/N. The real you. Sometimes a princess just needs the right dress to feel like one.”

You hesitated, still feeling unsure. “It’s just… I’m not used to this. I feel out of place.”

Hongjoong’s gaze was steady and reassuring, not once taking his eyes off of you. “You belong in this dress, Y/N. Trust me. Walk around a bit, feel the fabric, see how it moves with you.”

You took a tentative step, then another. The dress flowed around you, the fabric whispering against your skin. You turned to look at yourself in the mirror, and for the first time, you saw what Hongjoong saw – a woman who was strong, beautiful, and so, so much more.

“See?” he said softly, standing right behind you. “You’re perfect.”

Tears welled up in your eyes, and you fought hard to hold them back.

You're perfect.

Oh Hongjoong, you thought, I'm anything but. I'm lost, I'm weak, I'm scared. 

But instead, with his eyes on you, calm and beautiful and so honest looking, all you could mutter was, “Yes. Yes I am.”

He looked at you proudly.

And so, the hours went by, spent with you trying on several more gorgeous dresses and Hongjoong eagerly taking notes and making small changes here and there. 

With each dress you tried on, you felt a little more confident. The first few moments were always awkward, feeling out of place and almost guilty for indulging in this fantasy. But Hongjoong’s constant reassurance and the genuine admiration in his eyes slowly chipped away at your insecurities.

The emerald gown gave way to a sky-blue dress that shimmered in the light. Then a deep burgundy number that made your skin glow. Each dress was a work of art, and each time you emerged from behind the curtain, Hongjoong’s reaction was the same – pure, unadulterated admiration.

“You’re like a vision,” he murmured as you twirled in a pale pink gown. “These dresses come to life on you.”

By the time you tried on the final dress, a stunning midnight blue creation with delicate silver embroidery, you felt like a different person. The woman in the mirror was confident, elegant, and yes, perfect.

Like the princess from your book coming straight to life.

“You must be exhausted,” Hongjoong hummed, helping you step down the small podium, “go ahead and change while I fetch you something to drink, okay?”

“Okay.”

You slipped back behind the curtain. As you changed out of the midnight blue gown into your ordinary clothes, you felt the weight of reality slowly setting in again. 

Looking outside and seeing the sun slowly disappearing meant you head to return home.

Hongjoong returned with a glass of water and a soft smile. “Here you go,” he said, handing you the drink. “You did amazing today, Y/N. Thank you for helping me.”

You took the glass gratefully, feeling the cool water soothe your parched throat. “I'm glad I could be of help.”

“Alright, same day and time next week?” he asked.

Without wasting a second, you agreed. “Yes. I'll be there, Hongjoong.”

Wherever there was light, the lurking darkness was never far away, and you realised that pretty early on.

Even before Hongjoong stumbled into your life, you noticed something. Your husband wasn't coming home after getting off work, instead opting to spend his free time in the town's tavern or with his various affair partners.

And to be honest, you didn't mind.

Instead, you were happy about it. So so happy.

That is, until the townspeople started talking. Ruthlessly. And not about your abusive, alcoholic and cheating husband; no, about you - the ‘bad, sinning wife.’

The wife who couldn't be obedient enough. The wife who couldn't give him children. 

It was unbearable. Their words stung and hurt you deeply, but they were true.

…Right?

Your childhood and adolescence were spent learning about your future duties as a wife. Taking care of the house, obeying your husband without question, birthing his children and believing in God and his good deeds.

And you failed all these duties, so you deserved to be frowned upon. 

Even your own family thought so, too.

The only person who didn't was Kim Hongjoong, who was currently working on a purple gown you stood model for just a few minutes ago.

If he noticed how quiet you were today, he didn't mention it. 

“How does it look?” he asked, glancing up at you shyly, like your opinion truly mattered to him.

“It’s beautiful,” you replied, your voice barely above a whisper. The gown was stunning, but that was to be expected of him. But today, even his pretty dresses couldn't cheer you up.

He nodded, a faint smile touching his lips. “It's even prettier when you're wearing it, Y/N.”

You blushed previously, but only managed a small smile in return, though it didn’t reach your eyes. “Thank you, Hongjoong. I just… I’m not feeling very well today.”

Hongjoong set his needle and thread aside, his full attention now on you. “Do you want to talk about it?”

The genuine concern in his voice was almost your undoing. You took a shaky breath, trying to steady yourself, your finger nestling with the fabric of your shabby dress. “It’s nothing, really. Just… the usual gossip in town.”

His expression darkened slightly. “People can be cruel. You don’t deserve that.”

“Maybe I do,” you said quietly, looking away. “Maybe they’re right.”

“No,” Hongjoong said firmly, stepping closer. “They’re not right. You don’t deserve to be treated like this. You’re strong, and kind, and… you deserve so much more than what you’ve been given.”

A sob escaped your lips and you hid your face behind your hands, unable to face Hongjoong's eyes.

“H-how did you deal with this all alone? I can't… I don't even wanna leave my house anymore. The looks they give me, their words… It hurts so much, but I know they're right. I know that I-”

“What could you have possibly done wrong, Y/N?” Hongjoong cut you off, and for the first time since you've known him, he'd raised his voice, and you flinched, because anger could only ever mean one thing and soon his hands would-

His hands slowly took yours into his own, and instead of hurting you, they caressed you carefully as tears fell down your cheeks.

“I'm a bad wife, Hongjoong…”

He vehemently shook his head, his hands gripping your own tighter. “No, Y/N. You're not a bad wife. He is a bad husband.”

“Do you believe in God, Hongjoong?” you quietly asked.

He visibly tensed up, avoiding all eye contact. 

“It's okay,” you quickly reassured him, “I know in my religion it's a sin not believing, but since I'm also struggling… I really have no room to judge you for not believing in God. I also had my suspicions already, since you're one of the only people in town who doesn't attend Sunday mass.”

Hongjoong's shoulders relaxed a little, though he still seemed wary. "I don't know what I believe anymore," he admitted. "But I do know this: no god worth believing in would want you to suffer in a marriage like this.”

“I- please don't say that. God is good, he knows all, and if I am getting punished t-then that means that I deserve it! There's a verse... ah, God, a-according to... to Ephesians 5:22-24, ‘Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything’.”

Hongjoong sighed, his expression a mix of both frustration and empathy. “Y/N, I understand that those verses have been drilled into you, but what about the rest of it? The parts that speak about love and respect?”

You looked down, your hands trembling slightly. “I’ve tried to love and respect him, but nothing I do is ever enough.”

“That’s because he should give you the same love and respect in return, yet he doesn't,” Hongjoong said softly. “A true marriage should be a partnership, where both people uplift and support each other. What you have isn’t that.”

“But what if God is just testing me to see if my faith in him is strong enough? And I'm clearly failing him because I'm weak and… and… oh God.” You started sobbing uncontrollably again.

Hongjoong wrapped his arms around you, holding you close as you cried. He spoke softly, his voice steady and reassuring. "Y/N, if God is testing you, it’s not to see you suffer but to help you find your strength. And strength doesn’t mean staying in a place where you are being hurt. Strength is knowing when to stand up for yourself and seek the life you deserve."

You clung to him like a child to its mother, your tears soaking his shirt. "I don’t know if I can do that. I’ve never known anything else.”

“You asked me if I believed in God,” he reluctantly began, “and… it's complicated. I do believe in something, like a higher power that none of us can truly grasp, but… I don't believe in the Christian God. Or any other religion's God for that matter. Because to me, believing in something shouldn't come with any rules. Yet all religions do it, and I just… I think that's wrong. They label anything that they aren't comfortable with immediately as bad. I learned that the hard way.”

You pulled back slightly, looking at him with curiosity through your tear-streaked eyes. "What do you mean?"

Hongjoong sighed, his eyes distant as he recalled. "I was… different growing up. I didn’t fit the stereotype that everyone expected. I was more interested in art and fashion than in the traditional roles laid out for men in our community. I grew up in a small religious city just like you and because of that, I faced a lot of judgement. I was labelled a sinner, a bad person, just like you are now. But what truly opened my eyes was when I met two men whom I quickly grew close with. Well… they were in love with each other, and the people from my town… they planned to kill them. By publicly executing them. That night, the three of us ran away, and I haven't been back since.”

“What I also wanna say,” he added before you could speak, “is that if you truly believe in the Christian God and it makes you happy you should never give up your faith. But Y/N… you're not happy, not with your religion and definitely not with your marriage.”

Deep down, you knew he was right. But that also meant that your whole life, your whole upbringing was nothing but a lie. Nothing but pure manipulation. 

And you weren't ready to admit that yet.

He held you for what felt like hours, humming soft melodies and caressing your back over and over again.

“I'm sorry,” you said, your words muffled in his shirt, “I'm sorry for not being able to choose the right path yet.”

“Oh, you silly woman.” he laughed and squeezed you tightly again, “don't you dare apologise for taking your time.”

“Okay,” you hiccuped, wiping your tears away, “I'm sorry for apologising- Oh God, I just did it again.”

Hongjoong chuckled softly, his laughter mixing with your own, lightening the heavy mood. 

After a while, he backed up, and you immediately started missing his arms around you. “Hey, I know you're not feeling too well today, but there's something I wanna do. Something for… for you.”

“For me?” you asked surprised.

“Yeah. You only stood model for dresses that needed nothing but slight retouching, but… I wanna do a dress specifically for you.”

“For me?” you repeated, disbelief colouring your voice. “You’d make a dress just for me?”

Hongjoong smiled warmly, nodding. “Yes, just for you. You're like my muse, Y/N. You give me so many ideas.”

Your heart swelled at his words, and you felt your cheeks flaring up. “I… I don’t know what to say.”

“Then don’t say anything,” Hongjoong replied gently. “Just let me do this for you.”

You hesitated, then nodded slowly, trusting this man completely. “Okay.”

Hongjoong’s face lit up with pure excitement. “Great! Come, I have some ideas already.”

He led you into one of the rooms behind the shop. You quickly saw this was the place where he worked, full of mannequins, fabrics and more. He quickly set to work, pulling out fabrics and sketching designs into a sketchbook. His enthusiasm was infectious, and for the first time in a long while, you felt a flicker of genuine happiness.

“Do you have any preferences?” Hongjoong asked, looking up from his sketches. “A colour you love, a style you’ve always wanted to try?”

You thought for a moment. “I’ve always loved blue,” you admitted. “It reminds me of the sky, the sea… freedom.”

Hongjoong’s smile widened. “Blue it is, then. I can already see you in it, it suits you.”

As Hongjoong started working, you watched him silently in awe. His hands moved with precision and grace, his focus unwavering. It was clear that this truly was his passion, and he poured his heart into every stitch.

Hours passed, but there was still much to do. The room was filled with the soothing sound of fabric rustling and the rhythmic click of scissors. Hongjoong occasionally asked for your opinion, and after a while, Benji joined too, placing himself onto your lap and purring so loudly it made Hongjoong lose focus several times.

When the sun started slowly disappearing, it meant the end of your weekly session. “We made good progress today,” Hongjoong said, smiling. “Let's continue next week.”

When you returned home that day, the smile Hongjoong put on your face still hadn't left your face, not even when you saw the mess in your house or your husband passed out on the couch, completely wasted. Instead, you quietly started cleaning, all your worries and problems elsewhere because at that very moment, all you could think of was a certain man named Kim Hongjoong. 

And how you wished that, in another world, he could be your husband instead.

The next weeks seemed to drag on endlessly, each and every day filled with the same monotonous routine. Your husband’s drinking worsened, and the church, which had once been your one and only safe space, was slowly turning into a place you started to resent more and more each day, because every pair that laid its eyes on you was not viewing you with any kindness, but judgement, and the shame, the utter humiliation you felt was steadily becoming too much to handle. Yet, you reminded yourself that you did have something to look forward to: seeing Hongjoong once a week.

Every session with Hongjoong was a reprieve from the relentless condemnation you faced in the town. His shop became your sanctuary, a place where you could be yourself without fear of judgement. He was always there with a warm smile and a listening ear, making you feel valued and understood in a way you hadn't felt in years.

In a way not even family or close friends could.

One afternoon, as you entered his shop, you were greeted by Hongjoong slumped over his desk, sound asleep with both fabric and needles still in his hands.

You quietly walked over, careful not to startle him. Gently, you took the fabric and needles from his hands, setting them aside. You noticed dark circles under his eyes and the way his clothes hung loosely on his frame, signs of the toll his hard work and sleepless nights were taking on him.

Behind you, Benji made a sound, jumping on the table and staring at his owner.

“Your daddy is a little foolish for overworking himself, am I right baby?” you said, quietly chuckling as Benji laid his head in your outstretched hand. He didn't pay his owner any mind.

Hongjoong stirred at the sound of your voice, blinking awake. When he saw you, a sheepish smile tugged at his lips. “Y/N, I'm sorry. I must have dozed off.”

“Don't apologise,” you replied softly, still occupied with petting Benji. “You need to take better care of yourself, Joongie. You've been working too hard.”

He blushed at the nickname you called him, rubbing his eyes and sitting up. “I just… wanted everything to be perfect for you.”

“Perfection can wait,” you said gently. “Your health can't.”

He nodded, looking genuinely touched by your concern. “I'll try to rest more. I promise.”

Benji meowed softly, seemingly agreeing with you, and you couldn't help but laugh. “Even Benji thinks so.”

“I'm pretty sure Benji would agree to everything his mommy would say, he practically worships the ground you walk on,” Hongjoong chuckled, reaching out to scratch the needy cat behind the ears. At your insistent gaze, he reluctantly agreed: “Alright, alright. I'll take it easy.”

“Good,” you said, smiling. “Now, how about some tea? It looks like you could use a break.”

Hongjoong nodded appreciatively. “That sounds wonderful.”

You made your way to the small kitchenette in the back of the shop, preparing two cups of tea. As the water boiled, you glanced back at Hongjoong, who was now petting Benji and looking more relaxed. It warmed your heart to see him taking a moment for himself.

When the tea was ready, you brought the cups over to the table and handed one to Hongjoong. He took a sip, closing his eyes as he savoured the warmth. “Thank you, Y/N. This is just what I needed.”

“You do so much for me, let me tend to you once in a while too,” you said.

You both sat in comfortable silence for a while, respectively sipping your tea. After a few moments, Hongjoong broke the silence. “I've been thinking a lot lately,” he began, his voice tentative. “About what you said last time, about the church and how they've been treating you.”

You looked up from your tea, meeting his eyes. “What about it?”

“I've seen how much it's been weighing on you, and it breaks my heart,” he said, his gaze sincere. “But as a mere villager, my hands are bound, although I wish it would be different. Do you think… Do you think it would help if I would accompany you to Sunday mass? Of course separately, but maybe… maybe that could be of help to you.”

Your heart thudded in your chest, the sound almost deafening in the quiet of the room. His offer sent waves of emotions crashing through you.

No one had ever been this kind, this lovely to you, especially a man.

You stared at him, momentarily speechless, the weight of his words settling over you like a warm, comforting blanket. He wanted to help you, to stand by you in a place that had become a source of pain and humiliation, for the both of you. He cared enough to offer a hand in a situation he knew he had no control over, and the realisation hit you like a bolt of lightning.

You glanced down at your cup, the steam rising in delicate tendrils, and tried to steady your breathing. You had always known that Hongjoong was different, that he was shunned for being different, and that he had a kindness and understanding that was rare in this judgmental town. But now, as you sat there with him, you also realised something else: your feelings for him ran deeper than you had allowed yourself to acknowledge.

Million thoughts swirled in your mind. How could you feel this way about him when you were still bound to a man who had long since stopped caring for you? Your duty as a wife was to be loyal to your husband till death do you apart, and you failed. Miserably. Was it fair to Hongjoong, who had done nothing but support and uplift you, to be dragged into your complicated, painful life? 

No. He deserved a woman who could give him everything he wanted, and that definitely wasn't you. You couldn't even give him your hand in marriage.

And yet, despite the confusion and the guilt, there was an undeniable truth you couldn't ignore: you were falling for him. 

He was the prince you long had hoped you'd find, but you weren't his princess.

You thought back to all the times he had been there for you, his gentle words and warm smiles, the way he listened to you without judgement, making you feel seen and heard. His dedication to his craft, his passion for creating beauty in a world that often seemed devoid of it, mirrored the passion he had for helping you and any living being he encountered. It was this combination of compassion and creativity, of understanding and resilience, that drew you to him like a moth to a flame.

Tears welled up in your eyes as you looked back at him, his concerned expression making your heart ache. 

He had no idea what was going on inside your head, and in this very moment you made a promise to yourself: the feelings you harboured for this beautiful, perfect man would be kept a secret forever. You would take them with you to your very death.

You took a deep breath, trying to gather your thoughts. “Hongjoong,” you began, your voice trembling, “I... I don't know what to say. Your offer means the world to me. Truly.”

“But?” he asked, knowing you weren't quite done talking yet.

“I have to decline. I'm not gonna stand by and watch you going into a church you clearly don't want to go to. There's no reason for you to do so,” you said firmly.

“But there is a reason,” he whispered, his fingers slowly drawing patterns on the palm of your hand. You had to take your eyes off him. “You. You are the reason.”

Your heart skipped a beat, and the room seemed to blur around you as his words echoed in your mind. You. You are the reason. How could someone so selfless, so kind, want to sacrifice his comfort for yours? The weight of his sincerity bore down on you, making it difficult to breathe. You wanted to believe that you could accept his offer, lean on him without reservation, but the reality of your situation loomed large and impossible to ignore.

Tears welled up in your eyes again, threatening to spill over. You couldn’t let him do this. You couldn’t let him tie himself to your miseries and your complicated life. He deserved so much more.

But knowing Kim Hongjoong, he wouldn't accept no for an answer, and so you said quietly, “I'll think about it.”

He smiled brightly at you, his hand finding yours and squeezing it tightly. Your wedding ring was an uncomfortable reminder of the future this bond of yours would hold in the future.

Suddenly, Hongjoong's eyes lit up with a familiar spark of excitement. “I think it's time for you to see it,” he said, standing up with renewed energy. 

“See what? The dress?! You're already finished?!”

Instead of answering, he led you to the back of the shop, where a tall, covered mannequin stood. With a dramatic flourish, he pulled away the cloth, revealing a dress so exquisite it took your breath away.

The gown was a deep, saturated blue that shimmered like the ocean under a sky full of shining stars. The bodice was intricately embroidered with silver thread, forming delicate patterns of stars and swirling vines. The neckline was elegant and modest, dipping just enough to be flattering without being revealing. The sleeves were long and fitted, ending in graceful points that brushed against the tip of your hands, embroidered with the same silver designs that already adorned the bodice.

The skirt flowed from the waist in cascading layers of silk and tulle, creating a voluminous yet ethereal effect. Each layer was edged with even more silver embroidery. The back of the dress featured a row of tiny, delicate buttons that ran from the nape of the neck to the small of the back, adding a touch of old-world charm.

You gasped, unable to fathom what you were seeing. “Hongjoong, it’s... it’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

His entire being seemed to relax as a delicate reddish colour adorned his cheeks. “Thank God you like it, it would've been worthless if not.”

Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes as you reached out to touch the dress, your fingers trembling slightly. “Thank you, Joongie. I don’t know what to say.”

He smiled gently. “How about trying it on? I’d love to see you in it - No, I need to see you in it.”

You nodded, your heart pounding with a mix of excitement and nervousness. Hongjoong carefully lifted the gown from the mannequin and handed it to you. You stepped behind the changing screen, the luxurious fabric feeling cool and smooth against your skin.

As you tried to change into the gown, you realised just how intricate it truly was. The buttons down the back were nearly impossible to fasten on your own, and the delicate fabric seemed to slip through your fingers. You struggled with the fastenings, your frustration obvious as you fidgeted with each and every button like a little child.

“Hongjoong,” you called out softly, your voice trembling. “I think I might need some help.”

He was at your side in an instant, sending your heart into a frenzy. 

So close.

Too close? 

No, not close enough.

“Of course, let me help you.” His fingers moved carefully over the buttons, his touch sending shivers down your spine. You couldn’t help but feel a deep sense of intimacy as he worked, his hands warm and steady against your back.

When the last button was fastened, he stepped back, his eyes wide with admiration. “Y/N, you look... absolutely stunning.”

You stepped out from behind the screen, feeling like you had stepped into a fairy tale. The dress fit perfectly, accentuating your figure perfectly and complimenting every unique feature of yours. You twirled slightly, the skirt flowing around you like a dream.

Not once did Hongjoong’s eyes leave you. “It’s perfect,” he murmured. “You’re perfect.”

Your blush deepened as you caught sight of yourself in the mirror. The dress was everything you had ever dreamed of and more.

As you moved, you felt the cool brush of the fabric against your bare skin, a sensation that made you acutely aware of your body in a way you hadn’t felt in years. Just seconds before, Hongjoong’s hands had lingered on your back, and the memory of his touch sent a jolt of both pleasure and guilt through you. The touch of a man, one who truly cared for you, was something you hadn’t realised how much you really had craved until now. 

“I feel like a princess,” you whispered. You didn't notice a tear streaming down your check until Hongjoong carefully cupped your face and wiped it away. 

“Would the princess like to dance with me?” he sheepishly asked, sending a playful wink your way that made you both laugh and blush.

You managed a smile through your tears. “Yes, I would love that.”

Hongjoong’s eyes sparkled with joy as he extended his hand to you. You placed your hand in his, feeling the warmth of his skin against yours. He led you to the centre of the room, where he gently placed his other hand on your waist, the contact sending a shiver down your spine.

For a moment, you both stood there, simply enjoying the shared closeness. Then, slowly, he began to guide you in a swift motion, your movements mirroring each other with an ease that felt almost magical.

The dress flowed around you as you twirled. Hongjoong's eyes never once left yours, his gaze filled with a mixture of undying bliss and something deeper, something you were almost afraid to name.

“My husband never danced with me, not even on our wedding day,” you said.

Hongjoong’s expression softened, his grip on your hand tightening slightly as he led you in another gentle turn. “He doesn’t know what he’s missing,” he said quietly, his voice filled with a tenderness that made your heart ache.

You looked up at him, trying to hold back the tears that threatened to spill. “Hongjoong, I…”

He shook his head slightly, stopping your words with a gentle smile. “You don’t have to say anything, Y/N. Just… let’s enjoy this moment. Let’s pretend, even if it’s just for a little while, that the rest of the world doesn’t exist.”

You nodded, your heart swelling with emotion as you followed his lead, the two of you moving together in perfect harmony. In his arms, the weight of your troubles seemed to lift, if only for a brief moment. The dress, the dance, the soft glow of the afternoon light filtering through the shop’s windows - it all felt like a scene from your favourite romance books.

You and Hongjoong were lost in the moment, the world around you fading into the background as you danced together. His hand on your waist, the warmth of his touch, the way his eyes never left yours - it was all so perfect, so right, like nothing else in your entire life.

Just as Hongjoong spun you gracefully, a voice shattered your beautiful moment. “Well, what do we have here?”

You both froze, turning to see an elderly woman standing in the doorway, her sharp eyes fixed on you. You didn’t recognize her, but there was an unmistakable air of authority surrounding her. Hongjoong stiffened beside you, his hand dropping from your waist as he quickly took a step back.

“Mrs. Lee,” he said, his voice stern but polite. “What brings you here?”

Mrs. Lee’s eyes narrowed as she took in the scene, her gaze lingering on your flushed cheeks and the way you were anxiously clenching the skirt of the beautiful dress. “I’ve been looking for you, Hongjoong. We need to talk about my daughter.”

Your heart sank, and a wave of terror washed over you. You quickly stepped away from Hongjoong, trying to compose yourself.

“I… I should go,” you stammered, avoiding Mrs. Lee’s piercing gaze. “Thank you for everything, Hongjoong.”

Hongjoong reached out, his hand gently touching your arm. “Y/N, wait-”

Mrs. Lee’s voice cut through the tension. “Hongjoong, I’ve been very patient with you. My daughter, Sooyeon, is a good match for you, and it’s time you stop dilly-dallying and make a decision.”

Hongjoong’s jaw tightened, but he kept his tone measured. “Mrs. Lee, I’ve told you before, I’m not ready for marriage.”

Mrs. Lee scoffed, her eyes flicking to you with clear disdain. “Not ready for marriage, yet you have time for… this?” She gestured between the two of you, her meaning unmistakable.

You felt a flush of shame and panic. “This isn’t what it looks like. I'm a married woman,” you began, but Mrs. Lee cut you off with a dismissive wave of her hand.

“Save your breath, young lady. I know exactly what this is. And believe me, the town and your husband will hear about it!”

The threat hung heavy in the air, and you could see the worry etched on Hongjoong’s face. You almost fainted at the panic that rushed over you. He stepped forward, placing himself slightly between you and Mrs. Lee. “There’s no need for threats, Mrs. Lee. Y/N and I were just… discussing some alterations for her dress.”

Mrs. Lee raised an eyebrow, clearly unimpressed. “Discussing alterations, were you? In each other’s arms?”

Hongjoong opened his mouth to respond, but you couldn’t bear it any longer. “Please, Mrs. Lee,” you pleaded, your voice trembling. “Don’t tell anyone. It’s not what you think.”

I don't wanna die. 

I don't wanna die.

She looked at you, her lips forming into a cold smile. “I’ll keep this quiet - for now. But only if Hongjoong agrees to meet with my daughter. Alone.”

Hongjoong’s eyes widened in disbelief. “You can’t be serious.”

“Oh, I’m very serious,” Mrs. Lee replied, her tone leaving no room for argument. “Think about it, Hongjoong. Both your reputation is on the line here.”

The room fell silent, the weight of the ultimatum pressing down on all three of you. Finally, Hongjoong sighed, his shoulders slumping in defeat. “Fine. I’ll meet with Sooyeon.”

Mrs. Lee’s smile was triumphant. “Good. I’ll expect you at my house tomorrow evening.”

With that, she turned and left the shop, leaving you and Hongjoong standing in shocked silence. You could feel the tears welling up, the reality of the situation crashing down around you.

“I’m so sorry,” you whispered, your voice barely audible.

Hongjoong shook his head, his eyes filled with a mixture of frustration and sadness. “It’s not your fault, Y/N. None of this is.”

You wanted to believe him, but the guilt and fear were overwhelming. “I should go,” you said.

Hongjoong tried to stop you, but you rushed behind the curtain and hastily took the dress off. Finally, in your normal clothes again, Hongjoong tried to get ahold of you, but you took off in such a hurry he couldn't even open his mouth and practically sprinted out the open door.

“Y/N, wait,” he called after you, but you were already out the door, the tears streaming down your face. As you hurried home, you could only hope that Mrs. Lee would keep her word, because if not, there was a real possibility you would be dead real soon.

And the man you loved as well.

Your family's stall at the weekly market was as busy as ever. The familiar hustle and bustle of vendors calling out their wares and customers bartering for the best deals filled the air. You tried to focus on helping your mother arrange the vegetables, but your mind kept drifting away. 

“Y/N, are you alright?” your mother asked, her brow furrowed with concern as she noticed your distracted state.

You forced a smile. “Yes, mama. Just tired, I guess.”

She took off her gloves and took your face into her callused hands. Your body immediately relaxed at your mother's touch, while your mind was spiralling. 

“I should've never let your father marry you off to this douchebag,” she tearfully exclaimed.

Ah. There it was. The lies.

You knew your mother had always harboured guilt about your marriage, but it wasn't fair for her to carry the blame. It was a decision made by your father, and you had gone along with it, hoping for the best. But the weight of her words only added to the turmoil inside you. Her attempts at comfort now seemed hollow, given how often she had turned a blind eye to your suffering.

“It's not your fault, Mama,” you said gently, placing your hand over hers. “You couldn't have known how things would turn out.”

She sighed, wiping a tear from her cheek. “I just want you to be happy, Y/N. You deserve so much more than this.”

Her words stung. Where was this concern when you needed it most? When your cries for help went unheard?

While your father and older sisters didn't even pretend to care, your mother did - in a way. Yet never enough to actually help.

Maybe blaming her was too much. You knew that without your father's approval she couldn't do anything. After all, she was just a woman like you, trapped in a time where all you could do was listen and obey the men in your lives.

Yet it hurt. So much. Sometimes, all you wanted was to return to better times. Back in your mother's lap, laughing with your sisters while she told stories about love and worlds too perfect for your understanding. 

You were the last unmarried child remaining in your parents house. All your sisters were married off to good, somewhat wealthy husbands, either already with child and or waiting to be blessed with the fruit of life. All was well, until your father's business began to lose some serious money. He grew desperate to maintain the family's status, and in his desperation, he had accepted the first marriage proposal that came your way - no matter the man behind it. 

While all your sisters were given away to live in good, wealthy living households like the one you grew up in, your husband was working in a factory, barely making enough to support himself, yet alone a wife and future offspring. 

On top of that, he didn't even hide the fact how he was treating you. Your family knew. The town knew. Yet no one really cared, because you were now nothing but a poor, lowly woman.

And so, you became an outcast in your own family. You were the sister who had married below her status, the daughter who had brought shame to the family name. Your father, once proud and authoritative, could hardly look at you without a glimmer of disappointment in his eyes. Your sisters, though affectionate in public, whispered behind your back, their words filled with pity and disdain.

Your mother's concern, when it did come, was always in private. She would hold you and cry, promising that she had tried to convince your father to wait for a better match, that she had tried fighting for you. But where was she when you needed her most? When you had begged her to intervene, to stop the marriage, she had been silent. When you had showed up late at night with wounds serious enough to kill, she sent you right back home. And now, her tears felt like salt in an old, festering wound.

But while your mother had her faults, she was really the only family member you could really confide in. So, you took a deep, steady breath and turned to her with a determined expression. “Mom, there's something I need to tell you. Siwoo… Siwoo's-”

“Y/N,” she cut you off, “Don't slander your husband's name in front of me.”

“Mom, please-”

“Enough! We're in public!” she hissed, glancing around nervously.

You bit your lip, the words dying in your throat. The market's noise seemed to close in around you, a suffocating reminder of the ever-watchful eyes of the townspeople. You had learned long ago that your cries for help would only fall on deaf ears or, worse, invite further scrutiny and gossip.

So you swallowed your pain and simply nodded. “Yes, Mama. I'm sorry.”

She looked at you, her eyes filled with a mixture of regret and helplessness. “Let's finish up here. We'll talk later at home. Could you deliver the usual supplies to Mrs. Goo? You know the old lady can't walk anymore, but she pays us well. Your sister's too busy with the children to do it herself.”

You nodded again, grateful for the distraction. As you gathered the supplies and made your way through the busy market, you tried to steady your nerves. The fresh air and distance from the stall helped clear your mind a bit, but your conversation with your mother still pressed down on you.

She didn't even try to listen to you.

Navigating the crowded paths, you marvel at the sights and sounds of the market: the colourful array of various products, the lively chatter of people, the smell of freshly baked bread. It was a small reprieve from everything, yet it didn't keep your mind occupied for long. 

Turning a corner, you nearly bumped into Hongjoong, who was accompanied by Mrs. Lee's daughter, Sooyeon. The first thing you noticed was how awkward he seemed with her, keeling the woman at arms length, a stark contrast to how natural and at ease he was when he was with you.

“I'm really bad with women,” he said, clearly embarrassed. 

You chuckled. “I don't believe you. You act so natural and nonchalant when you're with me! Does that mean I'm not a real woman in your eyes? you teasingly asked.

His expression turned serious. “Of course I see you as a woman. But… everything feels easy when it comes to you.”

“Hongjoong!” you exclaimed, surprised.

You hadn't seen each other for a month now, but if he had something to say about you avoiding him, he didn't speak on it.

His eyes lit up at the sight of you, but his smile was somewhat strained. “Y/N, it's good to see you.”

Sooyeon glanced between the two of you, a curious look on her face. “Hello, Y/N. How are you?” she asked, her tone polite but detached.

“I'm well, thank you. Just running some errands for my mother,” you replied, trying to keep your tone light.

There was a brief, uncomfortable silence. You could sense the tension in Hongjoong's stance, the way he seemed almost relieved to see you yet burdened by Sooyeon's presence.

“Oh, look at those flowers! They’re so pretty!” Sooyeon suddenly exclaimed, her attention captured by a nearby stall. She moved toward the vibrant display, leaving you and Hongjoong a few moments alone.

Hongjoong let out a breath, his shoulders relaxing slightly. “Y/N, I’ve missed seeing-”

Your whole demeanour changed. Now, you thought, now's the only chance I got.

“Joong, I need your help,” you urgently whispered.

He glanced over at Sooyeon, ensuring she was still distracted. “How can I?...”

You clasped his hands with all the strength left in you. “He's gonna kill me. Tonight. H-he… he bought a gun. He's going to kill me and there's nothing I can do!” you sobbed.

Hongjoong's eyes widened in alarm, and he squeezed your hands reassuringly. “Y/N, we have to get you out of there. Do you have anywhere safe to go?”

You shook your head, panic making your thoughts race. “No, I have nowhere. I can't go back to my parents. They won't help.”

He looked around, his mind clearly racing as well. “We’ll figure something out. But first, you need to stay calm. We don’t want to draw any attention.”

“Please, Hongjoong, I’m so scared,” you whispered, your voice breaking.

He nodded firmly. “I know, but you’re not alone. I won’t let anything happen to you, I promise.”

Sooyeon returned, holding a bouquet of vibrant flowers. “Aren’t these lovely?” she asked, oblivious to the tension.

Oblivious to the fact that in just a few hours, you would be dead. Literally gone. Irradiaticated from the world.

He forced a smile. “They are, Sooyeon.”

You took a step back, the moment of closeness slipping away. “I should get going. Take care, Hongjoong. And you too, Soo Yeon.”

“Goodbye, Y/N,” Hongjoong said, his eyes lingering on you for a moment longer.

I'll be coming to your house later, his eyes said.

And I'll be waiting for you, Kim Hongjoong, you answered, before turning around and walking away.

You wondered if you would ever see the man you loved again. Because if he wasn't fast enough, all he would see was your dead body on the cold floor.

The clock you'd usually hear ticking in the background now lay broken on the floor, just like everything else in this godforsaken home.

In his rage this morning, Siwoo had left nothing, beating your home and your body until nothing but a mess was left behind.

Quietly, you sat in the corner of the room, your breath shallow and uneven. You waited.

And while you did, you asked yourself one last question: how would you face your death?

Would you face it fiercely, staring it directly in the eye, brave and unwavering? The thought appealed to you, the idea of going down with defiance and dignity. But the truth was, you didn't feel brave. You felt small and terrified, a helpless pawn in a cruel game, played by a man who created his own evil rules. The bruises on your body, the scars on your soul, they only told a story of survival, not of courage.

Would you cry, beg for mercy while already knowing that there was nothing saving you from this cruel fate? Your tears had dried up long ago, replaced by a numbing acceptance. You had begged before, pleaded for mercy in both whispers and screams, but Siwoo's cruelty knew no bounds. He thrived on your pain, feeding on your despair. You learned that begging would only fuel his sadistic pleasure.

Or would you smile and take its hand, leaving this world knowing that this life was all you had, that there was no use grieving it no more? This life, filled with suffering and loss, had hardly been spent well. But in the midst of all the darkness, there were fleeting moments of light - memories of laughter with your sisters, the warmth of your mother's embrace, the gentle kindness of Hongjoong. Perhaps those moments were enough to justify a smile, a final act of defiance against a life that had sought to break you.

There was no time for an answer. The door creaked open, and Siwoo stepped in, his eyes cold and merciless. 

You could almost feel death’s cold breath on your neck with his arrival. 

He approached slowly, savouring the fear he thought he saw in your eyes. "Ready for round two?" he sneered, raising a hand to strike you again.

But something inside you snapped. Perhaps it was the realisation that you had nothing left to lose, or perhaps it was the flicker of defiance that had always burned within you, hidden beneath layers of pain and submission. As his hand came down, you moved.

With a speed and strength born of desperation, you grabbed the broken clock from the floor and swung it at him. The sound of shattering glass and metal was followed by his roar of pain as the clock connected with his head. He stumbled back, blood streaming down his face, his eyes wide with shock.

“You bitch!” he screamed, lunging at you. But you were ready. You dodged his attack and grabbed a shard of broken glass from the floor. The sharp edge bit into your palm, but you didn't care. You had only one thought: survival.

As he came at you again, you thrust the glass into his side. He howled in agony, doubling over. You didn't stop. You couldn't stop. You pulled the glass out and stabbed him again, and again, each thrust fueled by years of pent-up fear, anger, and pain.

He fell to the floor, clutching at his wounds, his breath coming in ragged gasps. You stood over him, your chest heaving, blood dripping from your hands. For a moment, you simply watched him, your heart pounding in your ears.

“Y/N,” he rasped, his voice weak and broken. “Please…”

But there was no mercy left in you. You raised the glass one final time and- 

A hand grabbed yours. You immediately knew it wasn't your husband's, because he would never touch you like this, all soft and careful.

“Y/N,” the voice said, “Don't do it. Don't ever be like him.”

He gently pried the glass shard from your hand, his touch tender but firm. You fell into his arms, the weight of everything crashing down on you at once. His embrace was warm and comforting, a stark contrast to the violence you had just endured. He held you close, murmuring soothing words you couldn't quite make out over the sound of your own sobs.

“It's okay, it's over,” he whispered, his hand stroking your hair. “I'm here now.”

You clung to him, your tears soaking into his shirt. For the first time in what felt like forever, you felt a glimmer of hope. Hongjoong was here. Your Hongjoong was here. You weren't alone anymore.

It could've been the end, but the moment was short-lived. 

Siwoo, with a last surge of strength, lunged at you both. His fist connected with Hongjoong's face, sending him sprawling to the floor. His punches were relentless, each blow harder than the last, and you screamed for him to stop. But he wouldn't, he couldn't. He was beyond reason, lost in his own madness. Siwoo turned to you, his eyes blazing with fury. He grabbed you by the hair, yanking you to your feet.

“You think you can get away with this?” he snarled. “You're nothing but a woman, Y/N. My woman! I can do whatever I want with you!”

You struggled relentlessly against his grip, the pain in your scalp sharp and blinding. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Hongjoong trying to get up, blood trickling from his nose. Siwoon turned his attention towards your lover.

In that split second, you remembered the gun. The one Siwoo had bought. It was in the bedroom, just a few steps away. You had to get to it. You had to end this.

With a surge of adrenaline, you twisted in Siwoo's grasp, breaking free. You stumbled towards the bedroom, your heart pounding in your chest. You could hear Siwoo's footsteps behind you, his curses filling the air.

You burst into the bedroom and saw the gun on the nightstand. Your hands trembled as you grabbed it, turning just in time to see Siwoo barreling towards you, yanking Hongjoong with him. You raised the gun, your finger now laying directly on the trigger.

“Get away from him!” you screamed, your voice shaking.

Siwoo paused, a twisted grin spreading across his face. “You think you can scare me with that?”

Your hands steadied, and you took a deep breath. You locked eyes with your man for a second. “You're right, Hongjoong. I'm not like him. I'm worse.”

The first shot rang out, deafening in the small room. Siwoo's eyes widened in shock as the bullet hit him. You didn't stop. You couldn't. You fired again, and again, each shot a release of years of pain and fear and rage.

Siwoo collapsed to the floor, his body twitching one last time, blood pooling around him. You stood over him, the gun still in your hands, your breath coming in ragged gasps.

He was dead. You dropped the gun and turned to Hongjoong, who was struggling to sit up. You rushed to his side, cradling his face in your hands.

“Are you okay?” you whispered, tears streaming down your face.

He nodded weakly, his eyes filled with pain but also relief. “I am. But you aren't.”

It wasn't a question, yet you shook your head. You laughed, and Hongjoong looked at you like you were crazy. Maybe you were. 

“I've never felt this good,” you whispered, “because now I can do this.”

Careful to not hurt him further, you took his face into your hands. He was all bloody, but nonetheless beautiful.

And then, you pressed your lips onto his, desperate and hungry and so, so much more.

Hongjoong responded, his arms wrapping around you despite the pain. He held you close, pouring all his love and reassurance into the kiss. When you finally pulled back, you rested your forehead against his, both of you breathing heavily.

But as the adrenaline faded, reality started to set in. The room was a mess, the evidence of the struggle all around you. The sight of Siwoo's lifeless body, the blood on the floor, and the gun still warm in your hand triggered a rising panic within you.

You started to hyperventilate, your breath coming in shallow, rapid gasps. “What have I done? Hongjoong, what have I done?” you whispered, your voice trembling.

Hongjoong cupped your face in his hands, trying to calm you down. “Y/N, look at me. Focus on me. We need to think clearly.”

But it was too late. The full weight of what had just happened crashed down on you. You screamed, a raw, primal sound that echoed through the house. You fell to the floor, clutching your head, rocking back and forth as the horror of the situation consumed you.

Hongjoong knelt beside you, trying to soothe you, but his own panic was beginning to surface. “Y/N, please, we need to stay calm. We need to make a plan.”

His words barely registered through the fog that clouded your brain. Your cries grew louder, more desperate, as you struggled to comprehend the violence you had just unleashed.

“My angel, my love”, he pleaded with you, “listen to me. You have to listen to what I-”

In the distance, you both heard the sound of approaching footsteps and voices. Many approaching footsteps and noises. The shots had already alerted the people, and they were coming to investigate. The panic in Hongjoong's eyes matched your own as he realised the danger you were in.

“Y/N, listen to me,” he said urgently, grabbing your shoulders and shaking you lightly to get your attention. “We don't have much time. They're coming.”

Through your tears, you managed to focus on him. “What do we do, Hongjoong? What do we do?!”

His mind raced as he formulated a plan. It was desperate and dangerous, but it was the only way he could think to protect you. He picked up the gun and looked at you with a pained expression. “Y/N, I need you to trust me. Do you trust me?”

You nodded without hesitation. “I-i do, Joongie. Of course I do! But don't you dare try to endang-”

Before you could protest further, he aimed the gun right at your leg and pulled the trigger. The pain was immediate and excruciating, a burning agony that shot through your body. You screamed, collapsing to the floor, clutching your wounded leg.

Just a moment later, numerous people burst through the door, their eyes widening at the violent scene before them. Siwoo's body on the floor, you bleeding and crying, and Hongjoong holding the gun.

“What have you done?” you cried out, not even realising this sent off a completely wrong message to all the surrounding people. 

What you meant was why, why would he ever sacrifice himself like that.

Why?

Why? 

But all the mob heard was you screaming in anger at the man who just supposedly killed your husband, and now tried to shoot you.

Why, you wanted to scream. At whom you weren't too sure; at the universe, at God, at Hongjoong himself.

And as the angry mob launched at him, as multiple people were surrounding you and the lifeless corpse of your former husband, all you could think about was how not one, but two men lost their lives today.

Your abuser, and your lover.

And in the middle of it there was a woman who wept for them both, once out of sheer, unexplainable happiness, and once at the loss of the man whom she could now never hold in her arms again.

Part 2 here.

Ahhh it's soo good!!!

Your Gentle Hands (They Feel Like Home To Me). || Kim Hongjoong. [ Part I ]

Summary: meeting the local outcast shouldn't have ended with you slowly falling for him. yet you did, all while knowing you could never have this man, because you were already someones else's wife. two lovers, a dress shop, and a violent man between it all. we all know how this ends, right? ... right?

Pairing: dressmaker!kim hongjoong x fem. reader

Genre: angst, fluff

Wordcount: 15k

Warnings: playing in the 1800s so general warning for that, reader is married to a very violent man, emotional (justified) infidelity??, misogyny, (domestic) violence, injuries, talks about religion and people suffering because of it, blood, murder, i think that's it??

A/N: can't believe it's finally here. oh my gawd. i love this piece so much, but god did i struggle with it i'm so glad i can finally post part 1. i would really really appreciate reblogs, comments, and likes too, but reblogs are so helpful, so please do it if you liked it it would help me immensely. also comment if anyone would like to be tagged for part 2 of this two-shot! and now onto the most important part: the biggest thanks and hugs and kisses to @yessa-vie and @ghstzzn because without them, this fic would've long been in the damn trash can holy moly. also, thank you so so much to @seulrinnie-rinrin for beating this last minute, i'm so thankful really!! and as always divider credits to @firefly-graphics!

Taglist: @ghstzzn, @kyukyustar, @hwapetals, @foxinnie8, @preciouswoozi, @aussiekpopginger, @kitten4sannie

Available here on AO3.

My Dearest Husband,

The years have been harsh to us, and the cracks in our marriage grow wider with each passing day. Your hands, once embracing me so gentle and loving, now leave bruises upon my skin that no amount of powder or paint can conceal.

I dare not speak of the pain that lingers within me, for fear of invoking your wrath once more. Yet, the time has come for me to break the chains that bind me to this wretched existence and find solace in the arms of another.

Know this, my dear husband, I shall not suffer in silence any longer. Your tyranny shall not be tolerated, and I shall not rest until I am free from the shackles of your oppression.

With every ounce of strength left within me,

[Your Name]

The clock turned midnight.

You sat by the window, the gentle patter of rain against the glass a soothing backdrop to the turmoil raging within your heart. The room felt suffocating, the walls seemingly closing in on you with each passing moment. How long has it been since you last felt a glimmer of hope in this house?

How long has it been since you last felt safe in it?

You closed your eyes. Nothing but silence greeted you.

Good. 

The creak of the floorboards beneath your feet sounded deafening in the silence of the night, and you held your breath, afraid that even the slightest noise would awaken him.

Him.

Your husband, or rather: your own personal tormentor. 

“He's a good man,” your mother in law screamed, her fingernails marking your skin, her eyes desperate and angry. “Be a good wife and learn to obey and endure. My son said it was a mistake, and so be it!”

The black eye he gave you days later told a different story. Yet it didn't matter.

Once outside, you found yourself drawn to the familiar path that led to the edge of the forest. 

Finally stepping outside the small, scruffy looking house, you were greeted by darkness and the occasional chirping of various insects. Luckily, the temperatures were still mild in late September, yet you still pulled the cardigan tighter around you. Despite the darkness and uncertainty that surrounded you, there was a sense of freedom in being away from the suffocating confines of your home.

Just for a little, a few hours, both your mind and body could finally relax.

As you made your way along the familiar path towards the edge of the forest, a sense of anticipation bubbled within you. For the first time in what felt like an eternity, you allowed yourself to entertain the possibility of a bit of time free from fear and pain. It would only last a short while, making you lose valuable hours of sleep, but still for you, it was enough.

The path before you seemed to stretch on endlessly, disappearing into the darkness of the woods. Tall, gnarled trees loomed overhead, their branches reaching out like skeletal fingers towards the heavens. The soft rustle of leaves in the gentle breeze filled the air, accompanied by the occasional hoot of an owl or the distant cry of a night bird.

The chirping at the insects had stopped entirely.

Despite the late hour, the forest was buzzing with activity. Small creatures - stray cats and dogs known to frequent the area - scurried among the underbrush, their eyes glowing in the darkness as they went about their nocturnal rituals. Every now and then, the faint glimmer of fireflies could be seen darting through the trees, their soft, golden light illuminating the path ahead.

You followed their lead, heart pounding in your chest as you ventured deeper into the forest. For a split second, your mind wandered back to your husband. You knew he was asleep, passed out blank from the amount of alcohol he consumed at The Saloon, the only pub in your village.

Despite knowing he was asleep, the fear lingered like a dark cloud looming over your every thought. The bruises on your skin served as a constant reminder of his violence, and even in his absence, his presence felt suffocating.

“Meow.”

The sound broke the silence of the night, startling you momentarily, making you almost trip over your own feet. Your heart raced as you glanced around, half expecting to see your husband's shadow looming in the darkness. But there was no sign of him, only the gentle rustle of leaves and the occasional chirp of insects.

He's not here, you reminded yourself, taking a deep, slow breath, it's just a cat. It's okay. You're okay. 

As you stood there, trying to calm your racing heart, the source of the meow emerged from the bushes - a small, scruffy-looking cat with fur as dark as the night itself. 

It's a beautiful cat, you thought.

You crouched down, extending a tentative hand towards the cat. “Hey there, little one,” you murmured softly, your voice barely above a whisper. “Are you out here all alone?”

The cat looked you up and down for a moment, then cautiously approached, its movements slow and careful at first. It sniffed your outstretched hand, then rubbed its head against your fingers, purring softly.

A small smile tugged at the corners of your lips as you gently scratched behind the cat's ears.

“Looks like we're both seeking some peace in the night,” you said, your words more for yourself than for the cat. But in that moment, it felt like the cat understood, as if it were offering you silent companionship in this dark, lonely forest.

With a sigh, you leaned back against a nearby tree, the cat following and curling up beside you. 

“I should give you a name, right?” you hummed. The cat didn't respond, just continued purring as your fingers went through its unkempt yet soft fur.

“I have the gut feeling that you're a boy, so… let's name you Benji, shall we?”

You giggled as Benji took your hand in his paws, gently biting and licking while his purring filled your ears. 

“You like it? What a good, sweet boy.”

Suddenly, a rustling in the bushes nearby startled you, tearing your gaze away from Benji. The cat hissed, and only then you saw what was making the noise: a… goat? 

A goat that was now sprinting right at you at full speed. Panicked, you hurried to your feet, backing away slowly only to be met by the tree you previously set by. You turned around to run, but as you did, the goat lunged forward, catching your dress with its horns and tearing the fabric apart. A loud scream - your loud scream - echoed through the night, and you fell to the ground, your knees and hands immediately starting to bleed as they hit the forest floor. 

“Help!” you screamed, your voice barely audible over the pounding of your heart and the goat's relentless assault. In a desperate attempt to escape, you scrambled away, your hands and knees scraping against the rough ground once again, blood mingling with dirt as you crawled towards another tree, away from the animal. “Somebody, please help me!”

Your desperate cries pierced through the darkness. Every fibre of your being screamed for someone to hear your plea and rescue you from this nightmare.

And then, as if conjured by your sheer desperation, a male voice cut through the night. 

“Let her be, you damn goat!” 

Oh finally.

You turned towards the source of the voice, your heart pounding in your chest as you beheld the figure emerging from the shadows. In the darkness, you couldn't see his features clearly, but the silhouette of a lean figure emerged from the shadows. His stature was not imposing, but there was a quiet strength in the way he carried himself. Short, tousled hair framed his face, and his clean-shaven jawline hinted at a youthful charm. Despite his lean frame, there was a sense of agility and grace in his movements as he approached, his steps purposeful yet cautious. His clothes, though worn and faded, spoke of practicality rather than luxury, and the faint glint of silver caught your eye as moonlight danced upon a necklace around his neck.

“Get back, Django,” he commanded, his voice stern and serious. 

For a moment, it seemed as though the goat - Django - hesitated, its wild eyes darting between you and the stranger as if weighing its options. But then, with a defiant snort, the goat actually backed away, its hooves scraping against the forest floor as it retreated back to its owner's side.

You watched in stunned silence as the young man approached, his expression softened by a glimmer of concern. “Are you alright?” he asked, his voice gentler now.

You nodded weakly, your body trembling with a mixture of fear and relief as you struggled to sit up. He offered you a hand, and you accepted it gratefully, allowing him to help you to your feet. “Thank you,” you murmured, your voice barely above a whisper as you met his gaze.

Your eyes widened. 

You knew this man. 

It was hard not to, because the women at the market loved to gossip about him.

“He's a filthy man. Have you seen the dresses he makes? Outrageous.”

His name was Kim Hongjoong, you believed, a man known for his unconventional ways and said ‘outrageous’ dresses he crafted.

The women's cruel words towards him echoed in your mind, their voices dripping with disgust whenever his name was mentioned. They spoke of him as if he were beneath them, a plague, to be avoided at all costs. But as you looked at him now, you saw none of the malice they spoke of, only kindness and a smile etched into his features.

Hongjoong's eyes softened at your words. He had a pretty face, you realised, staring up at him in awe and curiosity.

You are a married woman! Oh Lord, may you save me from those malicious, evil thoughts!

“You shouldn't be out here alone,” he said, his voice tinged with concern. 

“I'm always here alone,” you responded. “It's my safe space.”

Instead of pressing you further, his eyes scanned your form, his expression growing more serious as he took in the extent of both your wounds and torn dress.

“It's even worse than I thought…” He looked at Django, who's now freely roaming around, seemingly no longer agitated and angry. “This goddamn goat,” he groaned.

“Is he always like this?” you asked.

Hongjoong sighed, running a hand through his tousled hair as he glanced back at Django with a mixture of frustration and resignation. “Unfortunately, yes,” he replied, “He's a stubborn creature, to say the least. His former owner wanted to slaughter him because he was aggressive towards humans and goats alike, but I convinced him to let me take care of him instead.”

“That's very noble of you,” you remarked, a sense of admiration evident in your voice. “Not many would take in a troubled animal like Django and give him a chance to change.”

Hongjoong offered you a small, appreciative smile, his eyes reflecting a hint of pride. “It hasn't been easy,” he admitted, patting Django's head, “But despite a few angry outbursts here and there, he's actually been adjusting well.”

You hummed, still keeping your distance from the goat that just attacked you. You and him probably won't become friends any time soon.

“Do you think you are able to walk?”

You nodded, though the pain throbbing in your knees and hands contradict your words. “I'll be fine,” you assured him, though your voice faltered slightly as you spoke.

Hongjoong's gaze softened with concern as he observed your state, his brows furrowing slightly with worry. “Are you sure?” he asked, his tone gentle yet insistent. “You're hurt, and it's not safe for you to be out here alone, especially with those injuries.”

You hesitated. Despite your initial plan to find solace and peace in the forest, you couldn't deny the reality of your situation - bruised, bleeding, and very much in need of assistance.

Swallowing your pride, you met Hongjoong's gaze with a grateful nod. “I... I think I could use some help,” you admitted, your voice wavering slightly with a mixture of exhaustion and relief.

Without hesitation, Hongjoong stepped closer, offering you his arm for support. “Here," he said, “Lean on me. We'll get you patched up and back home safely.”

“N-no!” you screeched, making Hongjoong falter in his steps and shoot you a confused look, “I-i mean, the night's still young, am I right? There's no need to return home just yet…”

“Why are you avoiding your own home?”

Your heart raced at his question, and you could feel your pulse pounding in your ears. His straightforwardness caught you off-guard, yet you tried - and failed - to hide your uneasiness and upcoming fear.

“You wouldn't understand,” you whispered.

Avoiding his eyes, you bit your lip, unsure of how to respond. The fear of revealing too much, of exposing the dark secrets of your marriage, held you back. You couldn't bear the thought of anyone knowing the truth, let alone a stranger who could very much use this information against you.

Hongjoong must have sensed your hesitation, for he didn't press further. Instead, he offered a gentle smile, his eyes filled with understanding. “It's alright,” he said softly. “You don't have to explain. Let's just get you somewhere safe and comfortable for now.”

His words and tone surprised you. You were accustomed to being met with demands and anger, not patience and empathy. The contrast left you feeling both confused and intrigued. Why was he being so kind to you? What did he hope to gain from helping a stranger in the middle of the night?

You accepted his support, leaning on him as you walked, your steps slow and cautious. The pain in your knees and hands was a constant reminder of your current vulnerability, but Hongjoong's steady presence provided a strange sense of comfort. Despite your initial wariness, you found yourself beginning to trust him.

Oh, what a foolish woman you are.

“Where will you take me?”

“To my house. It would be a shame if your husband would see you like this, with visible injuries and a torn dress, wouldn't it?”

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

That's how long you stared into his eyes, and he stared into yours.

Both of you knew what this meant.

Yet no one spoke it out loud. Society forbade it. 

You exhaled a trembling breath, the truth of his words settling heavily between you. “Yes,” you whispered, your voice barely audible, “It would be a shame.”

Hongjoong’s eyes softened, as if he could read the unspoken pain behind your words. “Let’s go, then,” he said gently, guiding you along the path with Django following closely behind.

“You know,” you whispered, “a married woman should never visit a bachelor's property alone. Especially at such late hours.”

Hongjoong glanced at you, a faint, yet boyish smile playing on his lips. “If you go by the rules of society, then yes,” he said, “but I'm known to do the exact opposite.”

Hongjoong's house came into view after a short walk through the forest. It was a modest building outside the small village, yet it looked charming, nestled amid tall trees that swayed gently in the night breeze. The front was adorned with a small, covered porch, where a couple of wooden chairs and a table sat invitingly. Ivy climbed up the walls, giving the house an almost fairytale-like quality.

It seemed to be well kept too, a stark contrast to your own home.

As you approached, you noticed the sign above the door, “Kim’s Dressmaking,” written in elegant, swirling letters. It was clear that the front of the house doubled as a shop. The large windows displayed a variety of dresses, each more beautiful and intricate than the last, their fabrics shimmering softly in the dim light. 

You remembered the villager's harsh words, and for a small second you thought: should you really follow this unruly man? What if anyone would see you entering his house at night, completely alone?

But you also knew this was quite literally the only solution right now, because if your husband saw you at home tending to your wounds he'd know of your nightly trips, and you couldn't let that happen.

So, the outcast’s house it was.

Hongjoong, who just escorted Django back to a small stall behind the property, passed you and pushed open the door, the bell above it tinkling softly. The interior of the shop was a burst of colour and creativity. Dresses of all styles and fabrics lined the walls, hung from mannequins, and lay draped over chairs and tables. Ribbons, lace, and beads were strewn about in an organised chaos that spoke of hours of dedicated craftsmanship. The scent of fresh fabric and a hint of lavender lingered in the air.

These dresses were made for royalty, beautiful and extravagant, unlike anything normal citizens would wear. You pitied Hongjoong; his talent was being wasted in a small village, while queens and princesses should be the ones wearing them, not women talking badly about his craft the second he turned his back on them.

“Welcome to my workshop,” Hongjoong said, a note of pride in his voice. He led you through the shop and towards a door at the back. “The living area is just through here.”

You followed him into a cozy living space that was a stark contrast to the bustling shop. The room was warmly lit by a few oil lamps, casting a soft glow over the rustic wooden furniture. A large, comfortable-looking sofa took up most of one wall, with a knitted blanket draped over it. Shelves lined with books and trinkets filled another wall, and a small fireplace crackled with a gentle fire, providing a soothing warmth. A modest kitchen area occupied one corner, with a wooden table and two chairs positioned nearby.

“Sit,” Hongjoong instructed gently, guiding you to the sofa. “I'll get some water and bandages for your wounds.”

“Yes, sir,” you giggled, a childlike euphoria suddenly overcoming you. He shot you a grin in response.

You sank into the sofa, the softness a welcome relief after the night's ordeal. You watched as Hongjoong moved around in the kitchen, his movements swift and efficient.

After a few minutes, he returned with a bowl of warm water, a clean cloth, and a small box of medical supplies. He knelt beside you, his eyes focused and serious as he gently took your hands in his.

“This might sting a bit,” he warned, dipping the cloth into the water and carefully cleaning the dirt and blood from your scrapes. His touch was surprisingly gentle, and you found yourself relaxing under his care.

“Thank you,” you murmured, watching him work. The tenderness in his actions was a stark contrast to the harshness you had endured at home.

“You're welcome,” he replied softly, his eyes meeting yours briefly before returning to his task. He worked silently for a few moments, cleaning and bandaging your wounds with practised ease.

“Now,” he said, standing up and cleaning his hands with the washcloth, “all we gotta do is fix your dress now to avoid your husband suspecting anything.”

“I… I don't have any money to pay you,” you admitted.

Hongjoong shook his head, a kind smile playing on his lips. "Don't worry about that," he said. “Consider it my way of helping a neighbour in need. I mean, it was my goat who put you in this situation after all.”

The kindness in his words brought tears to your eyes, and you had to look away to hide your emotions. It's been an hour since you've met this man, and yet he already treated you better than people whom you should be closest to. It had been so long since someone had shown you such genuine care and concern.

Hongjoong led you to a small sewing table in the corner of the room, surrounded by bolts of fabric, spools of thread, and an array of needles and scissors. He pulled out a chair for you and you sat down, feeling a sense of peace settle over you.

“Can I ask another favour of you?” you asked quietly.

Hongjoong knelt down, now looking up to you. It made your heart beat faster, and you hated yourself for it.

“Go ahead,” he said, encouraging you to speak.

“Please don't leave any obvious stitches… my husband would notice and then he would get mad and I really don't-” 

“Hey, hey,” Hongjoong shushed you, carefully taking your trembling hand in his own.

His gentle touch seemed to soothe you immediately. 

“I'll give my very best. Your husband won't notice anything amiss,” he promised.

As he worked, carefully mending the torn fabric of your dress, you watched his skilled hands move with precision and grace. His focus was unwavering, and you couldn't help but admire the artistry in his every movement.

“You know,” you said softly, breaking the silence, “the women in the village talk about you. They say your dresses are too extravagant for common folk.”

Hongjoong chuckled, his eyes twinkling with amusement. “I've heard the gossip,” he admitted. “But I don't create these dresses for them. Let's say my clients are of more… different backgrounds.”

“You mean women of wealthier status?”

“Indeed.”

You couldn't help but giggle at Hongjoong's response.

“So does that mean… Did you just… indirectly make fun of those women, Hongjoong?” you asked, trying to stifle your laughter.

A mischievous smile spread across his face as he glanced up at you. “Maybe I did,” he replied, his eyes twinkling with a playful glint. “But it's only fair, don't you think? They judge me without understanding, too.”

You laughed again, the sound feeling foreign yet welcome to your own ears. 

Hongjoong’s returned to his work, his fingers working fast, his concentration unwavering. You watched him in awe. There was something comforting about watching him work, knowing he was doing his best to help you. And on top of that, his skills fascinated you. You didn't know much about the craft of dressmaking, yet even a layin like you knew that true skill was needed for such incredible work.

And Kim Hongjoong definitely had that skill.

“Why do you stay here?” you asked after a moment of silence, curiosity getting the better of you. “You could be making dresses for queens and princesses, living a life far away from all the judgement and poverty of this village.”

Hongjoong paused, his needle stopping mid-air as he looked up at you once again. “I could do that, you're right,” he agreed, “but I prefer living peacefully. Going back to the court… it's not what I want anymore. People there are difficult.”

“More difficult than here?”

He laughed. “Yeah, actually. Just in a different way.”

You hummed. Hongjoong finished mending your dress, carefully examining his work before looking up at you with a satisfied smile. “There,” he said, “all done. Your husband won’t notice a thing.”

You looked down at the dress, marvelling at his skill. The stitches were invisible, the fabric as good as new. “Thank you,” you said, your gratitude heavily evident in your voice.

He stood up, offering you his hand once more. “Let me walk you home,” he said. “It’s not safe for you to go alone.”

Panic rushed through you at his suggestion, your heart pounding in your chest. You jerked back, withdrawing your hand from his as if his touch burned you.

“No,” you said, your voice trembling, “I can't let you do that. What if someone sees us together? What if my husband finds out?”

Hongjoong's brows furrowed in concern. “But it’s not safe for you to walk alone at this hour. After what happened in the forest, I can’t just let you go unaccompanied.”

You shook your head vehemently, your hands clenching the fabric of your freshly mended dress. “I appreciate your kindness, Hongjoong, but you don’t understand. If anyone sees us together, it will only get worse for me. My husband… he's not a kind man. He'll make my life a living hell.”

Hongjoong's expression softened. He reached out as if to comfort you, but then hesitated as you took another step back. “I won’t let anything happen to you, but I understand your fear. At least let me watch and follow you from a distance, to make sure you get home safely.”

You nodded reluctantly. It was late after all, and even though the village was small, you still didn't feel safe walking back alone. “Thank you,” you whispered, your voice barely audible. “Just… Please, be careful.”

Hongjoong gave you a reassuring nod. “I promise. Just stay close to the path, and I’ll make sure you get home safely.” He led you to the door, and as you stepped out into the night, the cool air brushing against your skin, you felt a sudden sadness overcoming you.

You didn't want to leave. Or moreover: you didn't want to go back. Back to him. 

With a final glance back at Hongjoong, you set off down the path, which was the opposite direction of where you first came to his house from the forest. 

The journey felt shorter than you wanted it to be, and before long, the familiar sight of your house came into view. The windows were dark, a sign that your husband was thankfully still asleep. You stopped at the edge of your property, your heart pounding in your chest as you glanced back at the shadowy figure of Hongjoong standing in the distance.

With a final nod and a slight wave, you turned away and walked up to the door. You opened it as quietly as you could, slipping inside and closing it behind you with a soft click. The house was silent, and only the steady ticking of the clock on the wall could be heard. You held your breath, listening for any sign of movement from your husband.

Silence. Good.

Because silence was always better than his usual rage and violence. 

“This is a good night,” you murmured. You quietly moved to the window, trying to see if Hongjoong was still there.

One last time. I gotta see him just one last time. 

But unfortunately, your kind and pretty stranger was no longer there.

The trees seemed to slowly close in around you. 

The forest surrounding you felt alive, watching, waiting.

A shiver ran down your spine as the sound of rustling leaves echoed ominously through the forest.

Just three more steps. One. Two. Three-

“Y/N?”

“Dear God!”

The sudden movement caused the reason you were here today to dart deeper into the underbrush. “Benji!” you called out, frustration now evident in your frantic voice.

Hongjoong stepped closer. “Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. What… are you doing here?”

You sighed. “I'm looking for a little cat. Met the little one last week, shortly before Django attacked me. He was gone afterwards. I've been coming here all week, but it's of no use. Last week he was so trusting, but now… it's so hard to even get close to him.”

The sun was piercing through the trees on this warm Friday evening, and you had to squint your eyes as you looked in the direction Benji ran away. 

“I can't see him anymore,” you said.

Hongjoong’s expression softened. “Do you want some help?” he asked. You nodded, shooting him an appreciative smile. “I’d really like that.”

The two of you moved cautiously, stepping lightly over the forest floor. The silence between you was punctuated only by the occasional crack of a twig or the rustle of leaves.

As you neared the spot where you last saw Benji, Hongjoong held up a hand, signalling for you to stop. He crouched down, peering into the thick bushes.

“There,” he whispered, pointing. “I see him.”

You followed his gaze and spotted the little cat, his eyes wide and alert as he watched you both from the shadows.

“Benji,” you called softly, your voice gentle. “It’s okay, buddy. We’re here to help you.”

Slowly, painstakingly, Benji inched closer, drawn by the sound of your voice. You took a tentative step forward, trying to maintain your balance on the uneven ground. Just as you were about to reach him, your foot slipped into a hidden hole in the forest floor. You stumbled, your ankle twisting painfully as you almost fell.

Behind you, Hongjoong reacted instantly, his strong hand grabbing your arm to steady you. You hissed in pain as his grip tightened around a particularly sore spot.

“Are you okay?” he asked, concern evident in his voice.

You nodded quickly, trying to brush it off. “Yeah, just twisted my ankle a bit.” You chuckled awkwardly. “It's quite funny, isn't it? I always get hurt when we meet.”

But Hongjoong didn’t let go. His eyes narrowed as he noticed the bruises on your arm, previously hidden by your sleeve. “Y/N… what happened?” he asked, his voice a mix of anger and concern.

You swallowed hard, looking away. “It’s nothing. Just an accident at home.”

He shook his head, his grip gentle but firm. “Y/N, don’t lie to me. Was this… your husband?”

You felt tears prickling at the corners of your eyes. “Hongjoong, please. Y-you know I can't talk about it.”

“I know,” he whispered, “But…” 

He didn't continue his sentence. Instead, his eyes found yours, and everything he couldn't say, every single, unspoken emotion you found there, hidden behind those kind, brown orbs. 

And you understood. You understood that if this man had the chance to change your situation, he would do it. Whatever it would take, and all for you. 

A married woman. Practically a stranger still, despite the intimate moment you shared.

In that very moment, you sinned.

And God was your only witness as you fell a little bit for a man that wasn't your husband.

“Meow.”

Benji’s soft meow brought you back to the present. You looked down to see the little cat rubbing against your leg, practically purring his heart out. You reached down, gently scooping the little Grey fur ball up into your arms.

Hongjoong watched you, his expression unreadable to you. “He's still so little. You sure his mother isn't nearby as well?” he asked.

You shook your head. “I've been here to get him every day and haven't seen any other cat here. He seems to be completely alone.”

“Alright then, let’s get him to my home first. We’ll figure something out then.”

You nodded. Without even mentioning, Hongjoong knew you couldn't take him to your own home. 

The path back seemed shorter, perhaps because you weren't alone anymore. Benji fidgeted a lot, but wasn't as much of a trouble as you originally thought. 

When you reached the edge of the forest, the sunlight was brighter, and you could hear the distant sounds of the town.

“I'm glad you don't have any close neighbours.”

“I'm also glad. Because if I did, I wouldn't be able to see you right now Y/N,” he said, and smiled. Oh, that goddamn smile. 

You're not quite sure what it meant, but you felt your heart skip a beat. It was something so beautiful only described in those ‘unholy’ books your mother forbade you to read, but ended up doing anyway. You felt like a young girl again, curious and desperate for love, seeking solace in men that weren't real, but oh so charming.

Men who couldn't hurt you. Couldn't touch any part of your body, only your pure heart.

Yeah, that's how Kim Hongjoong made you feel. With only a smile. 

You felt like you were flying, so free and happy and brave and young again. Like you could conquer the whole world together. 

But Kim Hongjoong wasn't yours. Because in no world could you ever become his.

Stepping foot into his shop was like entering another work, and even though you've already seen his gorgeous dresses, you still looked at them in awe. 

“One day,” you whispered. 

“If you want, you can try a dress on. No one will bother us since the store's closed today.”

You shivered. Hongjoong stood almost right behind you, his warmth radiating off his body.

The temptation to indulge in this small fantasy was strong, but you shook your head. “I couldn’t possibly,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. “I don’t want to impose.”

“You wouldn’t be imposing at all,” Hongjoong replied, his tone gentle yet insistent. “Think of it as a gift. Besides, I could use some help around here.”

Your curiosity piqued and you turned to face him. “Help? With what?”

He gestured to the array of dresses on display. “I’ve been working on some new designs, but I don’t have a proper model to try them on. I use mannequins for display, but it’s not the same. I need someone to see how the dresses move and fit in real life. You can work for me in exchange for taking in Benji. Model my dresses, help me with fittings and adjustments. It’s a fair trade, don’t you think?”

“I'd like that,” you whispered, “it's just… these dresses are made for royalty, not for a woman like… like me, Hongjoong.”

He vehemently shook his head. “You underestimate yourself, Y/N. Just try one on, for me?”

You nodded slowly, and he selected a dress from the rack, a soft, flowing gown in a shade of deep emerald. You took it from him, feeling the weight and texture of the fabric, smooth and luxurious against your skin.

Hongjoong led you to a small changing area behind a curtain. You stepped behind it, your heart pounding. Carefully, you undressed and slipped into the gown. The fabric felt cool and comforting, draping over your body with an unexpected ease. You adjusted the dress, feeling its weight settle around you, and took a deep breath before stepping out.

Hongjoong's reaction was immediate and genuine. His eyes widened, a look of pure admiration spreading across his face. “Y/N,” he breathed, “you look… stunning.”

You blushed, feeling embarrassed yet also undeniably charmed. “I don’t know about that. It feels strange, like I’m pretending to be someone I’m not.”

“You’re not pretending,” he said softly, stepping closer. “This is you, Y/N. The real you. Sometimes a princess just needs the right dress to feel like one.”

You hesitated, still feeling unsure. “It’s just… I’m not used to this. I feel out of place.”

Hongjoong’s gaze was steady and reassuring, not once taking his eyes off of you. “You belong in this dress, Y/N. Trust me. Walk around a bit, feel the fabric, see how it moves with you.”

You took a tentative step, then another. The dress flowed around you, the fabric whispering against your skin. You turned to look at yourself in the mirror, and for the first time, you saw what Hongjoong saw – a woman who was strong, beautiful, and so, so much more.

“See?” he said softly, standing right behind you. “You’re perfect.”

Tears welled up in your eyes, and you fought hard to hold them back.

You're perfect.

Oh Hongjoong, you thought, I'm anything but. I'm lost, I'm weak, I'm scared. 

But instead, with his eyes on you, calm and beautiful and so honest looking, all you could mutter was, “Yes. Yes I am.”

He looked at you proudly.

And so, the hours went by, spent with you trying on several more gorgeous dresses and Hongjoong eagerly taking notes and making small changes here and there. 

With each dress you tried on, you felt a little more confident. The first few moments were always awkward, feeling out of place and almost guilty for indulging in this fantasy. But Hongjoong’s constant reassurance and the genuine admiration in his eyes slowly chipped away at your insecurities.

The emerald gown gave way to a sky-blue dress that shimmered in the light. Then a deep burgundy number that made your skin glow. Each dress was a work of art, and each time you emerged from behind the curtain, Hongjoong’s reaction was the same – pure, unadulterated admiration.

“You’re like a vision,” he murmured as you twirled in a pale pink gown. “These dresses come to life on you.”

By the time you tried on the final dress, a stunning midnight blue creation with delicate silver embroidery, you felt like a different person. The woman in the mirror was confident, elegant, and yes, perfect.

Like the princess from your book coming straight to life.

“You must be exhausted,” Hongjoong hummed, helping you step down the small podium, “go ahead and change while I fetch you something to drink, okay?”

“Okay.”

You slipped back behind the curtain. As you changed out of the midnight blue gown into your ordinary clothes, you felt the weight of reality slowly setting in again. 

Looking outside and seeing the sun slowly disappearing meant you head to return home.

Hongjoong returned with a glass of water and a soft smile. “Here you go,” he said, handing you the drink. “You did amazing today, Y/N. Thank you for helping me.”

You took the glass gratefully, feeling the cool water soothe your parched throat. “I'm glad I could be of help.”

“Alright, same day and time next week?” he asked.

Without wasting a second, you agreed. “Yes. I'll be there, Hongjoong.”

Wherever there was light, the lurking darkness was never far away, and you realised that pretty early on.

Even before Hongjoong stumbled into your life, you noticed something. Your husband wasn't coming home after getting off work, instead opting to spend his free time in the town's tavern or with his various affair partners.

And to be honest, you didn't mind.

Instead, you were happy about it. So so happy.

That is, until the townspeople started talking. Ruthlessly. And not about your abusive, alcoholic and cheating husband; no, about you - the ‘bad, sinning wife.’

The wife who couldn't be obedient enough. The wife who couldn't give him children. 

It was unbearable. Their words stung and hurt you deeply, but they were true.

…Right?

Your childhood and adolescence were spent learning about your future duties as a wife. Taking care of the house, obeying your husband without question, birthing his children and believing in God and his good deeds.

And you failed all these duties, so you deserved to be frowned upon. 

Even your own family thought so, too.

The only person who didn't was Kim Hongjoong, who was currently working on a purple gown you stood model for just a few minutes ago.

If he noticed how quiet you were today, he didn't mention it. 

“How does it look?” he asked, glancing up at you shyly, like your opinion truly mattered to him.

“It’s beautiful,” you replied, your voice barely above a whisper. The gown was stunning, but that was to be expected of him. But today, even his pretty dresses couldn't cheer you up.

He nodded, a faint smile touching his lips. “It's even prettier when you're wearing it, Y/N.”

You blushed previously, but only managed a small smile in return, though it didn’t reach your eyes. “Thank you, Hongjoong. I just… I’m not feeling very well today.”

Hongjoong set his needle and thread aside, his full attention now on you. “Do you want to talk about it?”

The genuine concern in his voice was almost your undoing. You took a shaky breath, trying to steady yourself, your finger nestling with the fabric of your shabby dress. “It’s nothing, really. Just… the usual gossip in town.”

His expression darkened slightly. “People can be cruel. You don’t deserve that.”

“Maybe I do,” you said quietly, looking away. “Maybe they’re right.”

“No,” Hongjoong said firmly, stepping closer. “They’re not right. You don’t deserve to be treated like this. You’re strong, and kind, and… you deserve so much more than what you’ve been given.”

A sob escaped your lips and you hid your face behind your hands, unable to face Hongjoong's eyes.

“H-how did you deal with this all alone? I can't… I don't even wanna leave my house anymore. The looks they give me, their words… It hurts so much, but I know they're right. I know that I-”

“What could you have possibly done wrong, Y/N?” Hongjoong cut you off, and for the first time since you've known him, he'd raised his voice, and you flinched, because anger could only ever mean one thing and soon his hands would-

His hands slowly took yours into his own, and instead of hurting you, they caressed you carefully as tears fell down your cheeks.

“I'm a bad wife, Hongjoong…”

He vehemently shook his head, his hands gripping your own tighter. “No, Y/N. You're not a bad wife. He is a bad husband.”

“Do you believe in God, Hongjoong?” you quietly asked.

He visibly tensed up, avoiding all eye contact. 

“It's okay,” you quickly reassured him, “I know in my religion it's a sin not believing, but since I'm also struggling… I really have no room to judge you for not believing in God. I also had my suspicions already, since you're one of the only people in town who doesn't attend Sunday mass.”

Hongjoong's shoulders relaxed a little, though he still seemed wary. "I don't know what I believe anymore," he admitted. "But I do know this: no god worth believing in would want you to suffer in a marriage like this.”

“I- please don't say that. God is good, he knows all, and if I am getting punished t-then that means that I deserve it! There's a verse... ah, God, a-according to... to Ephesians 5:22-24, ‘Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything’.”

Hongjoong sighed, his expression a mix of both frustration and empathy. “Y/N, I understand that those verses have been drilled into you, but what about the rest of it? The parts that speak about love and respect?”

You looked down, your hands trembling slightly. “I’ve tried to love and respect him, but nothing I do is ever enough.”

“That’s because he should give you the same love and respect in return, yet he doesn't,” Hongjoong said softly. “A true marriage should be a partnership, where both people uplift and support each other. What you have isn’t that.”

“But what if God is just testing me to see if my faith in him is strong enough? And I'm clearly failing him because I'm weak and… and… oh God.” You started sobbing uncontrollably again.

Hongjoong wrapped his arms around you, holding you close as you cried. He spoke softly, his voice steady and reassuring. "Y/N, if God is testing you, it’s not to see you suffer but to help you find your strength. And strength doesn’t mean staying in a place where you are being hurt. Strength is knowing when to stand up for yourself and seek the life you deserve."

You clung to him like a child to its mother, your tears soaking his shirt. "I don’t know if I can do that. I’ve never known anything else.”

“You asked me if I believed in God,” he reluctantly began, “and… it's complicated. I do believe in something, like a higher power that none of us can truly grasp, but… I don't believe in the Christian God. Or any other religion's God for that matter. Because to me, believing in something shouldn't come with any rules. Yet all religions do it, and I just… I think that's wrong. They label anything that they aren't comfortable with immediately as bad. I learned that the hard way.”

You pulled back slightly, looking at him with curiosity through your tear-streaked eyes. "What do you mean?"

Hongjoong sighed, his eyes distant as he recalled. "I was… different growing up. I didn’t fit the stereotype that everyone expected. I was more interested in art and fashion than in the traditional roles laid out for men in our community. I grew up in a small religious city just like you and because of that, I faced a lot of judgement. I was labelled a sinner, a bad person, just like you are now. But what truly opened my eyes was when I met two men whom I quickly grew close with. Well… they were in love with each other, and the people from my town… they planned to kill them. By publicly executing them. That night, the three of us ran away, and I haven't been back since.”

“What I also wanna say,” he added before you could speak, “is that if you truly believe in the Christian God and it makes you happy you should never give up your faith. But Y/N… you're not happy, not with your religion and definitely not with your marriage.”

Deep down, you knew he was right. But that also meant that your whole life, your whole upbringing was nothing but a lie. Nothing but pure manipulation. 

And you weren't ready to admit that yet.

He held you for what felt like hours, humming soft melodies and caressing your back over and over again.

“I'm sorry,” you said, your words muffled in his shirt, “I'm sorry for not being able to choose the right path yet.”

“Oh, you silly woman.” he laughed and squeezed you tightly again, “don't you dare apologise for taking your time.”

“Okay,” you hiccuped, wiping your tears away, “I'm sorry for apologising- Oh God, I just did it again.”

Hongjoong chuckled softly, his laughter mixing with your own, lightening the heavy mood. 

After a while, he backed up, and you immediately started missing his arms around you. “Hey, I know you're not feeling too well today, but there's something I wanna do. Something for… for you.”

“For me?” you asked surprised.

“Yeah. You only stood model for dresses that needed nothing but slight retouching, but… I wanna do a dress specifically for you.”

“For me?” you repeated, disbelief colouring your voice. “You’d make a dress just for me?”

Hongjoong smiled warmly, nodding. “Yes, just for you. You're like my muse, Y/N. You give me so many ideas.”

Your heart swelled at his words, and you felt your cheeks flaring up. “I… I don’t know what to say.”

“Then don’t say anything,” Hongjoong replied gently. “Just let me do this for you.”

You hesitated, then nodded slowly, trusting this man completely. “Okay.”

Hongjoong’s face lit up with pure excitement. “Great! Come, I have some ideas already.”

He led you into one of the rooms behind the shop. You quickly saw this was the place where he worked, full of mannequins, fabrics and more. He quickly set to work, pulling out fabrics and sketching designs into a sketchbook. His enthusiasm was infectious, and for the first time in a long while, you felt a flicker of genuine happiness.

“Do you have any preferences?” Hongjoong asked, looking up from his sketches. “A colour you love, a style you’ve always wanted to try?”

You thought for a moment. “I’ve always loved blue,” you admitted. “It reminds me of the sky, the sea… freedom.”

Hongjoong’s smile widened. “Blue it is, then. I can already see you in it, it suits you.”

As Hongjoong started working, you watched him silently in awe. His hands moved with precision and grace, his focus unwavering. It was clear that this truly was his passion, and he poured his heart into every stitch.

Hours passed, but there was still much to do. The room was filled with the soothing sound of fabric rustling and the rhythmic click of scissors. Hongjoong occasionally asked for your opinion, and after a while, Benji joined too, placing himself onto your lap and purring so loudly it made Hongjoong lose focus several times.

When the sun started slowly disappearing, it meant the end of your weekly session. “We made good progress today,” Hongjoong said, smiling. “Let's continue next week.”

When you returned home that day, the smile Hongjoong put on your face still hadn't left your face, not even when you saw the mess in your house or your husband passed out on the couch, completely wasted. Instead, you quietly started cleaning, all your worries and problems elsewhere because at that very moment, all you could think of was a certain man named Kim Hongjoong. 

And how you wished that, in another world, he could be your husband instead.

The next weeks seemed to drag on endlessly, each and every day filled with the same monotonous routine. Your husband’s drinking worsened, and the church, which had once been your one and only safe space, was slowly turning into a place you started to resent more and more each day, because every pair that laid its eyes on you was not viewing you with any kindness, but judgement, and the shame, the utter humiliation you felt was steadily becoming too much to handle. Yet, you reminded yourself that you did have something to look forward to: seeing Hongjoong once a week.

Every session with Hongjoong was a reprieve from the relentless condemnation you faced in the town. His shop became your sanctuary, a place where you could be yourself without fear of judgement. He was always there with a warm smile and a listening ear, making you feel valued and understood in a way you hadn't felt in years.

In a way not even family or close friends could.

One afternoon, as you entered his shop, you were greeted by Hongjoong slumped over his desk, sound asleep with both fabric and needles still in his hands.

You quietly walked over, careful not to startle him. Gently, you took the fabric and needles from his hands, setting them aside. You noticed dark circles under his eyes and the way his clothes hung loosely on his frame, signs of the toll his hard work and sleepless nights were taking on him.

Behind you, Benji made a sound, jumping on the table and staring at his owner.

“Your daddy is a little foolish for overworking himself, am I right baby?” you said, quietly chuckling as Benji laid his head in your outstretched hand. He didn't pay his owner any mind.

Hongjoong stirred at the sound of your voice, blinking awake. When he saw you, a sheepish smile tugged at his lips. “Y/N, I'm sorry. I must have dozed off.”

“Don't apologise,” you replied softly, still occupied with petting Benji. “You need to take better care of yourself, Joongie. You've been working too hard.”

He blushed at the nickname you called him, rubbing his eyes and sitting up. “I just… wanted everything to be perfect for you.”

“Perfection can wait,” you said gently. “Your health can't.”

He nodded, looking genuinely touched by your concern. “I'll try to rest more. I promise.”

Benji meowed softly, seemingly agreeing with you, and you couldn't help but laugh. “Even Benji thinks so.”

“I'm pretty sure Benji would agree to everything his mommy would say, he practically worships the ground you walk on,” Hongjoong chuckled, reaching out to scratch the needy cat behind the ears. At your insistent gaze, he reluctantly agreed: “Alright, alright. I'll take it easy.”

“Good,” you said, smiling. “Now, how about some tea? It looks like you could use a break.”

Hongjoong nodded appreciatively. “That sounds wonderful.”

You made your way to the small kitchenette in the back of the shop, preparing two cups of tea. As the water boiled, you glanced back at Hongjoong, who was now petting Benji and looking more relaxed. It warmed your heart to see him taking a moment for himself.

When the tea was ready, you brought the cups over to the table and handed one to Hongjoong. He took a sip, closing his eyes as he savoured the warmth. “Thank you, Y/N. This is just what I needed.”

“You do so much for me, let me tend to you once in a while too,” you said.

You both sat in comfortable silence for a while, respectively sipping your tea. After a few moments, Hongjoong broke the silence. “I've been thinking a lot lately,” he began, his voice tentative. “About what you said last time, about the church and how they've been treating you.”

You looked up from your tea, meeting his eyes. “What about it?”

“I've seen how much it's been weighing on you, and it breaks my heart,” he said, his gaze sincere. “But as a mere villager, my hands are bound, although I wish it would be different. Do you think… Do you think it would help if I would accompany you to Sunday mass? Of course separately, but maybe… maybe that could be of help to you.”

Your heart thudded in your chest, the sound almost deafening in the quiet of the room. His offer sent waves of emotions crashing through you.

No one had ever been this kind, this lovely to you, especially a man.

You stared at him, momentarily speechless, the weight of his words settling over you like a warm, comforting blanket. He wanted to help you, to stand by you in a place that had become a source of pain and humiliation, for the both of you. He cared enough to offer a hand in a situation he knew he had no control over, and the realisation hit you like a bolt of lightning.

You glanced down at your cup, the steam rising in delicate tendrils, and tried to steady your breathing. You had always known that Hongjoong was different, that he was shunned for being different, and that he had a kindness and understanding that was rare in this judgmental town. But now, as you sat there with him, you also realised something else: your feelings for him ran deeper than you had allowed yourself to acknowledge.

Million thoughts swirled in your mind. How could you feel this way about him when you were still bound to a man who had long since stopped caring for you? Your duty as a wife was to be loyal to your husband till death do you apart, and you failed. Miserably. Was it fair to Hongjoong, who had done nothing but support and uplift you, to be dragged into your complicated, painful life? 

No. He deserved a woman who could give him everything he wanted, and that definitely wasn't you. You couldn't even give him your hand in marriage.

And yet, despite the confusion and the guilt, there was an undeniable truth you couldn't ignore: you were falling for him. 

He was the prince you long had hoped you'd find, but you weren't his princess.

You thought back to all the times he had been there for you, his gentle words and warm smiles, the way he listened to you without judgement, making you feel seen and heard. His dedication to his craft, his passion for creating beauty in a world that often seemed devoid of it, mirrored the passion he had for helping you and any living being he encountered. It was this combination of compassion and creativity, of understanding and resilience, that drew you to him like a moth to a flame.

Tears welled up in your eyes as you looked back at him, his concerned expression making your heart ache. 

He had no idea what was going on inside your head, and in this very moment you made a promise to yourself: the feelings you harboured for this beautiful, perfect man would be kept a secret forever. You would take them with you to your very death.

You took a deep breath, trying to gather your thoughts. “Hongjoong,” you began, your voice trembling, “I... I don't know what to say. Your offer means the world to me. Truly.”

“But?” he asked, knowing you weren't quite done talking yet.

“I have to decline. I'm not gonna stand by and watch you going into a church you clearly don't want to go to. There's no reason for you to do so,” you said firmly.

“But there is a reason,” he whispered, his fingers slowly drawing patterns on the palm of your hand. You had to take your eyes off him. “You. You are the reason.”

Your heart skipped a beat, and the room seemed to blur around you as his words echoed in your mind. You. You are the reason. How could someone so selfless, so kind, want to sacrifice his comfort for yours? The weight of his sincerity bore down on you, making it difficult to breathe. You wanted to believe that you could accept his offer, lean on him without reservation, but the reality of your situation loomed large and impossible to ignore.

Tears welled up in your eyes again, threatening to spill over. You couldn’t let him do this. You couldn’t let him tie himself to your miseries and your complicated life. He deserved so much more.

But knowing Kim Hongjoong, he wouldn't accept no for an answer, and so you said quietly, “I'll think about it.”

He smiled brightly at you, his hand finding yours and squeezing it tightly. Your wedding ring was an uncomfortable reminder of the future this bond of yours would hold in the future.

Suddenly, Hongjoong's eyes lit up with a familiar spark of excitement. “I think it's time for you to see it,” he said, standing up with renewed energy. 

“See what? The dress?! You're already finished?!”

Instead of answering, he led you to the back of the shop, where a tall, covered mannequin stood. With a dramatic flourish, he pulled away the cloth, revealing a dress so exquisite it took your breath away.

The gown was a deep, saturated blue that shimmered like the ocean under a sky full of shining stars. The bodice was intricately embroidered with silver thread, forming delicate patterns of stars and swirling vines. The neckline was elegant and modest, dipping just enough to be flattering without being revealing. The sleeves were long and fitted, ending in graceful points that brushed against the tip of your hands, embroidered with the same silver designs that already adorned the bodice.

The skirt flowed from the waist in cascading layers of silk and tulle, creating a voluminous yet ethereal effect. Each layer was edged with even more silver embroidery. The back of the dress featured a row of tiny, delicate buttons that ran from the nape of the neck to the small of the back, adding a touch of old-world charm.

You gasped, unable to fathom what you were seeing. “Hongjoong, it’s... it’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

His entire being seemed to relax as a delicate reddish colour adorned his cheeks. “Thank God you like it, it would've been worthless if not.”

Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes as you reached out to touch the dress, your fingers trembling slightly. “Thank you, Joongie. I don’t know what to say.”

He smiled gently. “How about trying it on? I’d love to see you in it - No, I need to see you in it.”

You nodded, your heart pounding with a mix of excitement and nervousness. Hongjoong carefully lifted the gown from the mannequin and handed it to you. You stepped behind the changing screen, the luxurious fabric feeling cool and smooth against your skin.

As you tried to change into the gown, you realised just how intricate it truly was. The buttons down the back were nearly impossible to fasten on your own, and the delicate fabric seemed to slip through your fingers. You struggled with the fastenings, your frustration obvious as you fidgeted with each and every button like a little child.

“Hongjoong,” you called out softly, your voice trembling. “I think I might need some help.”

He was at your side in an instant, sending your heart into a frenzy. 

So close.

Too close? 

No, not close enough.

“Of course, let me help you.” His fingers moved carefully over the buttons, his touch sending shivers down your spine. You couldn’t help but feel a deep sense of intimacy as he worked, his hands warm and steady against your back.

When the last button was fastened, he stepped back, his eyes wide with admiration. “Y/N, you look... absolutely stunning.”

You stepped out from behind the screen, feeling like you had stepped into a fairy tale. The dress fit perfectly, accentuating your figure perfectly and complimenting every unique feature of yours. You twirled slightly, the skirt flowing around you like a dream.

Not once did Hongjoong’s eyes leave you. “It’s perfect,” he murmured. “You’re perfect.”

Your blush deepened as you caught sight of yourself in the mirror. The dress was everything you had ever dreamed of and more.

As you moved, you felt the cool brush of the fabric against your bare skin, a sensation that made you acutely aware of your body in a way you hadn’t felt in years. Just seconds before, Hongjoong’s hands had lingered on your back, and the memory of his touch sent a jolt of both pleasure and guilt through you. The touch of a man, one who truly cared for you, was something you hadn’t realised how much you really had craved until now. 

“I feel like a princess,” you whispered. You didn't notice a tear streaming down your check until Hongjoong carefully cupped your face and wiped it away. 

“Would the princess like to dance with me?” he sheepishly asked, sending a playful wink your way that made you both laugh and blush.

You managed a smile through your tears. “Yes, I would love that.”

Hongjoong’s eyes sparkled with joy as he extended his hand to you. You placed your hand in his, feeling the warmth of his skin against yours. He led you to the centre of the room, where he gently placed his other hand on your waist, the contact sending a shiver down your spine.

For a moment, you both stood there, simply enjoying the shared closeness. Then, slowly, he began to guide you in a swift motion, your movements mirroring each other with an ease that felt almost magical.

The dress flowed around you as you twirled. Hongjoong's eyes never once left yours, his gaze filled with a mixture of undying bliss and something deeper, something you were almost afraid to name.

“My husband never danced with me, not even on our wedding day,” you said.

Hongjoong’s expression softened, his grip on your hand tightening slightly as he led you in another gentle turn. “He doesn’t know what he’s missing,” he said quietly, his voice filled with a tenderness that made your heart ache.

You looked up at him, trying to hold back the tears that threatened to spill. “Hongjoong, I…”

He shook his head slightly, stopping your words with a gentle smile. “You don’t have to say anything, Y/N. Just… let’s enjoy this moment. Let’s pretend, even if it’s just for a little while, that the rest of the world doesn’t exist.”

You nodded, your heart swelling with emotion as you followed his lead, the two of you moving together in perfect harmony. In his arms, the weight of your troubles seemed to lift, if only for a brief moment. The dress, the dance, the soft glow of the afternoon light filtering through the shop’s windows - it all felt like a scene from your favourite romance books.

You and Hongjoong were lost in the moment, the world around you fading into the background as you danced together. His hand on your waist, the warmth of his touch, the way his eyes never left yours - it was all so perfect, so right, like nothing else in your entire life.

Just as Hongjoong spun you gracefully, a voice shattered your beautiful moment. “Well, what do we have here?”

You both froze, turning to see an elderly woman standing in the doorway, her sharp eyes fixed on you. You didn’t recognize her, but there was an unmistakable air of authority surrounding her. Hongjoong stiffened beside you, his hand dropping from your waist as he quickly took a step back.

“Mrs. Lee,” he said, his voice stern but polite. “What brings you here?”

Mrs. Lee’s eyes narrowed as she took in the scene, her gaze lingering on your flushed cheeks and the way you were anxiously clenching the skirt of the beautiful dress. “I’ve been looking for you, Hongjoong. We need to talk about my daughter.”

Your heart sank, and a wave of terror washed over you. You quickly stepped away from Hongjoong, trying to compose yourself.

“I… I should go,” you stammered, avoiding Mrs. Lee’s piercing gaze. “Thank you for everything, Hongjoong.”

Hongjoong reached out, his hand gently touching your arm. “Y/N, wait-”

Mrs. Lee’s voice cut through the tension. “Hongjoong, I’ve been very patient with you. My daughter, Sooyeon, is a good match for you, and it’s time you stop dilly-dallying and make a decision.”

Hongjoong’s jaw tightened, but he kept his tone measured. “Mrs. Lee, I’ve told you before, I’m not ready for marriage.”

Mrs. Lee scoffed, her eyes flicking to you with clear disdain. “Not ready for marriage, yet you have time for… this?” She gestured between the two of you, her meaning unmistakable.

You felt a flush of shame and panic. “This isn’t what it looks like. I'm a married woman,” you began, but Mrs. Lee cut you off with a dismissive wave of her hand.

“Save your breath, young lady. I know exactly what this is. And believe me, the town and your husband will hear about it!”

The threat hung heavy in the air, and you could see the worry etched on Hongjoong’s face. You almost fainted at the panic that rushed over you. He stepped forward, placing himself slightly between you and Mrs. Lee. “There’s no need for threats, Mrs. Lee. Y/N and I were just… discussing some alterations for her dress.”

Mrs. Lee raised an eyebrow, clearly unimpressed. “Discussing alterations, were you? In each other’s arms?”

Hongjoong opened his mouth to respond, but you couldn’t bear it any longer. “Please, Mrs. Lee,” you pleaded, your voice trembling. “Don’t tell anyone. It’s not what you think.”

I don't wanna die. 

I don't wanna die.

She looked at you, her lips forming into a cold smile. “I’ll keep this quiet - for now. But only if Hongjoong agrees to meet with my daughter. Alone.”

Hongjoong’s eyes widened in disbelief. “You can’t be serious.”

“Oh, I’m very serious,” Mrs. Lee replied, her tone leaving no room for argument. “Think about it, Hongjoong. Both your reputation is on the line here.”

The room fell silent, the weight of the ultimatum pressing down on all three of you. Finally, Hongjoong sighed, his shoulders slumping in defeat. “Fine. I’ll meet with Sooyeon.”

Mrs. Lee’s smile was triumphant. “Good. I’ll expect you at my house tomorrow evening.”

With that, she turned and left the shop, leaving you and Hongjoong standing in shocked silence. You could feel the tears welling up, the reality of the situation crashing down around you.

“I’m so sorry,” you whispered, your voice barely audible.

Hongjoong shook his head, his eyes filled with a mixture of frustration and sadness. “It’s not your fault, Y/N. None of this is.”

You wanted to believe him, but the guilt and fear were overwhelming. “I should go,” you said.

Hongjoong tried to stop you, but you rushed behind the curtain and hastily took the dress off. Finally, in your normal clothes again, Hongjoong tried to get ahold of you, but you took off in such a hurry he couldn't even open his mouth and practically sprinted out the open door.

“Y/N, wait,” he called after you, but you were already out the door, the tears streaming down your face. As you hurried home, you could only hope that Mrs. Lee would keep her word, because if not, there was a real possibility you would be dead real soon.

And the man you loved as well.

Your family's stall at the weekly market was as busy as ever. The familiar hustle and bustle of vendors calling out their wares and customers bartering for the best deals filled the air. You tried to focus on helping your mother arrange the vegetables, but your mind kept drifting away. 

“Y/N, are you alright?” your mother asked, her brow furrowed with concern as she noticed your distracted state.

You forced a smile. “Yes, mama. Just tired, I guess.”

She took off her gloves and took your face into her callused hands. Your body immediately relaxed at your mother's touch, while your mind was spiralling. 

“I should've never let your father marry you off to this douchebag,” she tearfully exclaimed.

Ah. There it was. The lies.

You knew your mother had always harboured guilt about your marriage, but it wasn't fair for her to carry the blame. It was a decision made by your father, and you had gone along with it, hoping for the best. But the weight of her words only added to the turmoil inside you. Her attempts at comfort now seemed hollow, given how often she had turned a blind eye to your suffering.

“It's not your fault, Mama,” you said gently, placing your hand over hers. “You couldn't have known how things would turn out.”

She sighed, wiping a tear from her cheek. “I just want you to be happy, Y/N. You deserve so much more than this.”

Her words stung. Where was this concern when you needed it most? When your cries for help went unheard?

While your father and older sisters didn't even pretend to care, your mother did - in a way. Yet never enough to actually help.

Maybe blaming her was too much. You knew that without your father's approval she couldn't do anything. After all, she was just a woman like you, trapped in a time where all you could do was listen and obey the men in your lives.

Yet it hurt. So much. Sometimes, all you wanted was to return to better times. Back in your mother's lap, laughing with your sisters while she told stories about love and worlds too perfect for your understanding. 

You were the last unmarried child remaining in your parents house. All your sisters were married off to good, somewhat wealthy husbands, either already with child and or waiting to be blessed with the fruit of life. All was well, until your father's business began to lose some serious money. He grew desperate to maintain the family's status, and in his desperation, he had accepted the first marriage proposal that came your way - no matter the man behind it. 

While all your sisters were given away to live in good, wealthy living households like the one you grew up in, your husband was working in a factory, barely making enough to support himself, yet alone a wife and future offspring. 

On top of that, he didn't even hide the fact how he was treating you. Your family knew. The town knew. Yet no one really cared, because you were now nothing but a poor, lowly woman.

And so, you became an outcast in your own family. You were the sister who had married below her status, the daughter who had brought shame to the family name. Your father, once proud and authoritative, could hardly look at you without a glimmer of disappointment in his eyes. Your sisters, though affectionate in public, whispered behind your back, their words filled with pity and disdain.

Your mother's concern, when it did come, was always in private. She would hold you and cry, promising that she had tried to convince your father to wait for a better match, that she had tried fighting for you. But where was she when you needed her most? When you had begged her to intervene, to stop the marriage, she had been silent. When you had showed up late at night with wounds serious enough to kill, she sent you right back home. And now, her tears felt like salt in an old, festering wound.

But while your mother had her faults, she was really the only family member you could really confide in. So, you took a deep, steady breath and turned to her with a determined expression. “Mom, there's something I need to tell you. Siwoo… Siwoo's-”

“Y/N,” she cut you off, “Don't slander your husband's name in front of me.”

“Mom, please-”

“Enough! We're in public!” she hissed, glancing around nervously.

You bit your lip, the words dying in your throat. The market's noise seemed to close in around you, a suffocating reminder of the ever-watchful eyes of the townspeople. You had learned long ago that your cries for help would only fall on deaf ears or, worse, invite further scrutiny and gossip.

So you swallowed your pain and simply nodded. “Yes, Mama. I'm sorry.”

She looked at you, her eyes filled with a mixture of regret and helplessness. “Let's finish up here. We'll talk later at home. Could you deliver the usual supplies to Mrs. Goo? You know the old lady can't walk anymore, but she pays us well. Your sister's too busy with the children to do it herself.”

You nodded again, grateful for the distraction. As you gathered the supplies and made your way through the busy market, you tried to steady your nerves. The fresh air and distance from the stall helped clear your mind a bit, but your conversation with your mother still pressed down on you.

She didn't even try to listen to you.

Navigating the crowded paths, you marvel at the sights and sounds of the market: the colourful array of various products, the lively chatter of people, the smell of freshly baked bread. It was a small reprieve from everything, yet it didn't keep your mind occupied for long. 

Turning a corner, you nearly bumped into Hongjoong, who was accompanied by Mrs. Lee's daughter, Sooyeon. The first thing you noticed was how awkward he seemed with her, keeling the woman at arms length, a stark contrast to how natural and at ease he was when he was with you.

“I'm really bad with women,” he said, clearly embarrassed. 

You chuckled. “I don't believe you. You act so natural and nonchalant when you're with me! Does that mean I'm not a real woman in your eyes? you teasingly asked.

His expression turned serious. “Of course I see you as a woman. But… everything feels easy when it comes to you.”

“Hongjoong!” you exclaimed, surprised.

You hadn't seen each other for a month now, but if he had something to say about you avoiding him, he didn't speak on it.

His eyes lit up at the sight of you, but his smile was somewhat strained. “Y/N, it's good to see you.”

Sooyeon glanced between the two of you, a curious look on her face. “Hello, Y/N. How are you?” she asked, her tone polite but detached.

“I'm well, thank you. Just running some errands for my mother,” you replied, trying to keep your tone light.

There was a brief, uncomfortable silence. You could sense the tension in Hongjoong's stance, the way he seemed almost relieved to see you yet burdened by Sooyeon's presence.

“Oh, look at those flowers! They’re so pretty!” Sooyeon suddenly exclaimed, her attention captured by a nearby stall. She moved toward the vibrant display, leaving you and Hongjoong a few moments alone.

Hongjoong let out a breath, his shoulders relaxing slightly. “Y/N, I’ve missed seeing-”

Your whole demeanour changed. Now, you thought, now's the only chance I got.

“Joong, I need your help,” you urgently whispered.

He glanced over at Sooyeon, ensuring she was still distracted. “How can I?...”

You clasped his hands with all the strength left in you. “He's gonna kill me. Tonight. H-he… he bought a gun. He's going to kill me and there's nothing I can do!” you sobbed.

Hongjoong's eyes widened in alarm, and he squeezed your hands reassuringly. “Y/N, we have to get you out of there. Do you have anywhere safe to go?”

You shook your head, panic making your thoughts race. “No, I have nowhere. I can't go back to my parents. They won't help.”

He looked around, his mind clearly racing as well. “We’ll figure something out. But first, you need to stay calm. We don’t want to draw any attention.”

“Please, Hongjoong, I’m so scared,” you whispered, your voice breaking.

He nodded firmly. “I know, but you’re not alone. I won’t let anything happen to you, I promise.”

Sooyeon returned, holding a bouquet of vibrant flowers. “Aren’t these lovely?” she asked, oblivious to the tension.

Oblivious to the fact that in just a few hours, you would be dead. Literally gone. Irradiaticated from the world.

He forced a smile. “They are, Sooyeon.”

You took a step back, the moment of closeness slipping away. “I should get going. Take care, Hongjoong. And you too, Soo Yeon.”

“Goodbye, Y/N,” Hongjoong said, his eyes lingering on you for a moment longer.

I'll be coming to your house later, his eyes said.

And I'll be waiting for you, Kim Hongjoong, you answered, before turning around and walking away.

You wondered if you would ever see the man you loved again. Because if he wasn't fast enough, all he would see was your dead body on the cold floor.

The clock you'd usually hear ticking in the background now lay broken on the floor, just like everything else in this godforsaken home.

In his rage this morning, Siwoo had left nothing, beating your home and your body until nothing but a mess was left behind.

Quietly, you sat in the corner of the room, your breath shallow and uneven. You waited.

And while you did, you asked yourself one last question: how would you face your death?

Would you face it fiercely, staring it directly in the eye, brave and unwavering? The thought appealed to you, the idea of going down with defiance and dignity. But the truth was, you didn't feel brave. You felt small and terrified, a helpless pawn in a cruel game, played by a man who created his own evil rules. The bruises on your body, the scars on your soul, they only told a story of survival, not of courage.

Would you cry, beg for mercy while already knowing that there was nothing saving you from this cruel fate? Your tears had dried up long ago, replaced by a numbing acceptance. You had begged before, pleaded for mercy in both whispers and screams, but Siwoo's cruelty knew no bounds. He thrived on your pain, feeding on your despair. You learned that begging would only fuel his sadistic pleasure.

Or would you smile and take its hand, leaving this world knowing that this life was all you had, that there was no use grieving it no more? This life, filled with suffering and loss, had hardly been spent well. But in the midst of all the darkness, there were fleeting moments of light - memories of laughter with your sisters, the warmth of your mother's embrace, the gentle kindness of Hongjoong. Perhaps those moments were enough to justify a smile, a final act of defiance against a life that had sought to break you.

There was no time for an answer. The door creaked open, and Siwoo stepped in, his eyes cold and merciless. 

You could almost feel death’s cold breath on your neck with his arrival. 

He approached slowly, savouring the fear he thought he saw in your eyes. "Ready for round two?" he sneered, raising a hand to strike you again.

But something inside you snapped. Perhaps it was the realisation that you had nothing left to lose, or perhaps it was the flicker of defiance that had always burned within you, hidden beneath layers of pain and submission. As his hand came down, you moved.

With a speed and strength born of desperation, you grabbed the broken clock from the floor and swung it at him. The sound of shattering glass and metal was followed by his roar of pain as the clock connected with his head. He stumbled back, blood streaming down his face, his eyes wide with shock.

“You bitch!” he screamed, lunging at you. But you were ready. You dodged his attack and grabbed a shard of broken glass from the floor. The sharp edge bit into your palm, but you didn't care. You had only one thought: survival.

As he came at you again, you thrust the glass into his side. He howled in agony, doubling over. You didn't stop. You couldn't stop. You pulled the glass out and stabbed him again, and again, each thrust fueled by years of pent-up fear, anger, and pain.

He fell to the floor, clutching at his wounds, his breath coming in ragged gasps. You stood over him, your chest heaving, blood dripping from your hands. For a moment, you simply watched him, your heart pounding in your ears.

“Y/N,” he rasped, his voice weak and broken. “Please…”

But there was no mercy left in you. You raised the glass one final time and- 

A hand grabbed yours. You immediately knew it wasn't your husband's, because he would never touch you like this, all soft and careful.

“Y/N,” the voice said, “Don't do it. Don't ever be like him.”

He gently pried the glass shard from your hand, his touch tender but firm. You fell into his arms, the weight of everything crashing down on you at once. His embrace was warm and comforting, a stark contrast to the violence you had just endured. He held you close, murmuring soothing words you couldn't quite make out over the sound of your own sobs.

“It's okay, it's over,” he whispered, his hand stroking your hair. “I'm here now.”

You clung to him, your tears soaking into his shirt. For the first time in what felt like forever, you felt a glimmer of hope. Hongjoong was here. Your Hongjoong was here. You weren't alone anymore.

It could've been the end, but the moment was short-lived. 

Siwoo, with a last surge of strength, lunged at you both. His fist connected with Hongjoong's face, sending him sprawling to the floor. His punches were relentless, each blow harder than the last, and you screamed for him to stop. But he wouldn't, he couldn't. He was beyond reason, lost in his own madness. Siwoo turned to you, his eyes blazing with fury. He grabbed you by the hair, yanking you to your feet.

“You think you can get away with this?” he snarled. “You're nothing but a woman, Y/N. My woman! I can do whatever I want with you!”

You struggled relentlessly against his grip, the pain in your scalp sharp and blinding. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Hongjoong trying to get up, blood trickling from his nose. Siwoon turned his attention towards your lover.

In that split second, you remembered the gun. The one Siwoo had bought. It was in the bedroom, just a few steps away. You had to get to it. You had to end this.

With a surge of adrenaline, you twisted in Siwoo's grasp, breaking free. You stumbled towards the bedroom, your heart pounding in your chest. You could hear Siwoo's footsteps behind you, his curses filling the air.

You burst into the bedroom and saw the gun on the nightstand. Your hands trembled as you grabbed it, turning just in time to see Siwoo barreling towards you, yanking Hongjoong with him. You raised the gun, your finger now laying directly on the trigger.

“Get away from him!” you screamed, your voice shaking.

Siwoo paused, a twisted grin spreading across his face. “You think you can scare me with that?”

Your hands steadied, and you took a deep breath. You locked eyes with your man for a second. “You're right, Hongjoong. I'm not like him. I'm worse.”

The first shot rang out, deafening in the small room. Siwoo's eyes widened in shock as the bullet hit him. You didn't stop. You couldn't. You fired again, and again, each shot a release of years of pain and fear and rage.

Siwoo collapsed to the floor, his body twitching one last time, blood pooling around him. You stood over him, the gun still in your hands, your breath coming in ragged gasps.

He was dead. You dropped the gun and turned to Hongjoong, who was struggling to sit up. You rushed to his side, cradling his face in your hands.

“Are you okay?” you whispered, tears streaming down your face.

He nodded weakly, his eyes filled with pain but also relief. “I am. But you aren't.”

It wasn't a question, yet you shook your head. You laughed, and Hongjoong looked at you like you were crazy. Maybe you were. 

“I've never felt this good,” you whispered, “because now I can do this.”

Careful to not hurt him further, you took his face into your hands. He was all bloody, but nonetheless beautiful.

And then, you pressed your lips onto his, desperate and hungry and so, so much more.

Hongjoong responded, his arms wrapping around you despite the pain. He held you close, pouring all his love and reassurance into the kiss. When you finally pulled back, you rested your forehead against his, both of you breathing heavily.

But as the adrenaline faded, reality started to set in. The room was a mess, the evidence of the struggle all around you. The sight of Siwoo's lifeless body, the blood on the floor, and the gun still warm in your hand triggered a rising panic within you.

You started to hyperventilate, your breath coming in shallow, rapid gasps. “What have I done? Hongjoong, what have I done?” you whispered, your voice trembling.

Hongjoong cupped your face in his hands, trying to calm you down. “Y/N, look at me. Focus on me. We need to think clearly.”

But it was too late. The full weight of what had just happened crashed down on you. You screamed, a raw, primal sound that echoed through the house. You fell to the floor, clutching your head, rocking back and forth as the horror of the situation consumed you.

Hongjoong knelt beside you, trying to soothe you, but his own panic was beginning to surface. “Y/N, please, we need to stay calm. We need to make a plan.”

His words barely registered through the fog that clouded your brain. Your cries grew louder, more desperate, as you struggled to comprehend the violence you had just unleashed.

“My angel, my love”, he pleaded with you, “listen to me. You have to listen to what I-”

In the distance, you both heard the sound of approaching footsteps and voices. Many approaching footsteps and noises. The shots had already alerted the people, and they were coming to investigate. The panic in Hongjoong's eyes matched your own as he realised the danger you were in.

“Y/N, listen to me,” he said urgently, grabbing your shoulders and shaking you lightly to get your attention. “We don't have much time. They're coming.”

Through your tears, you managed to focus on him. “What do we do, Hongjoong? What do we do?!”

His mind raced as he formulated a plan. It was desperate and dangerous, but it was the only way he could think to protect you. He picked up the gun and looked at you with a pained expression. “Y/N, I need you to trust me. Do you trust me?”

You nodded without hesitation. “I-i do, Joongie. Of course I do! But don't you dare try to endang-”

Before you could protest further, he aimed the gun right at your leg and pulled the trigger. The pain was immediate and excruciating, a burning agony that shot through your body. You screamed, collapsing to the floor, clutching your wounded leg.

Just a moment later, numerous people burst through the door, their eyes widening at the violent scene before them. Siwoo's body on the floor, you bleeding and crying, and Hongjoong holding the gun.

“What have you done?” you cried out, not even realising this sent off a completely wrong message to all the surrounding people. 

What you meant was why, why would he ever sacrifice himself like that.

Why?

Why? 

But all the mob heard was you screaming in anger at the man who just supposedly killed your husband, and now tried to shoot you.

Why, you wanted to scream. At whom you weren't too sure; at the universe, at God, at Hongjoong himself.

And as the angry mob launched at him, as multiple people were surrounding you and the lifeless corpse of your former husband, all you could think about was how not one, but two men lost their lives today.

Your abuser, and your lover.

And in the middle of it there was a woman who wept for them both, once out of sheer, unexplainable happiness, and once at the loss of the man whom she could now never hold in her arms again.

Part 2 here.

Bloody First Kisses

This is smut. MINORS DNI.

I've been meaning to write Changbin smut for the LONGEST time and I finally did it hehehe. And vampire smut too! The best kind of smut!

Summary: Vampire!Changbin knows he can come to you when he goes into heat every month, and both of you are staring to catch feelings.

Pairing: Sub!Vampire!Changbin x dom!reader

Includes: vampire bites, unprotected vaginal sex (USE CONDOMS!!), riding, pegging, "needy", "slut", first kisses, smut with feelings, but mostly smut

Word Count: 1.8k

Taglist: @weirdowithaphone @caught-in-the-afterglow @palindrome969 @skzstan12345 @katsukis1wife @hyunjinsjeans @somethingkindazainy @silverstarburst

AU: Vampire

Network: @mirohs-aurora-society

Comments, reblogs, likes appreciated!!

Masterlist

---

Your text conversations with Changbin were sparse. But at least they were consistent.

10:12pm, June 21

Changbin 🧛‍♂️: hey… so You: Hm? Changbin🧛‍♂️: you know why I’m texting you You: What? Changbin🧛‍♂️: c’mon You: You’re perfectly aware of what you’ve gotta say if you’re pulling up to me with a ‘hey… so’ Changbin🧛‍♂️: you’re gonna make me say it aren’t you You: Yeah I am lol Changbin🧛‍♂️: i’m just gonna come over Changbin🧛‍♂️: and we can talk then You: Oh didn’t I tell you? I moved Changbin🧛‍♂️: you didn’t actually did you? You: No Changbin. Changbin🧛‍♂️: ok then i’m omw Changbin🧛‍♂️: here

12:32am, July 19

Changbin🧛‍♂️: heyyy You: Damn, a whole month, and you didn’t even so much as text You: Not even a ‘made it home safe, y/n!’ after last time You: You’re gonna break my heart You: 😢 Changbin🧛‍♂️: wasn’t aware we were at the stage where you were looking for a ‘made it home safe, y/n!’ text Changbin🧛‍♂️: lmao You: Just come over Changbin🧛‍♂️: 🫡🫡 Changbin🧛‍♂️: here

3:34pm, July 19

Changbin🧛‍♂️: made it home safe, y/n! You: Good boy! Changbin🧛‍♂️: don’t condescend to me You: Aww but you liked it so much last night Changbin🧛‍♂️: … Changbin🧛‍♂️: no comment You: Yeah I’m sure you’ll have no comment in a month, too Changbin🧛‍♂️: NO COMMENT.

This time was a bit irregular, though.

10:58pm, August 20

Changbin🧛‍♂️: you up? You: Yeah lol Changbin🧛‍♂️: can i come over You: Yeah lol? You: All good? Changbin🧛‍♂️: i have a comment now

You’d barely looked at the text when there was a knock at your door. You hummed as you stood up. He was standing there, staring into the peephole of the door with bright red eyes.

You unlocked the door and swung it open.

He stood there, his eyelids heavy, his mouth half-open, his fangs peeking out from behind his lip. “Please let me in.” He practically whined.

You caressed his cheek, and his whine grew more desperate.

“Come inside, baby.”

He stepped into your apartment, and you locked the door behind him.

“Needy little vampire.” You whispered, brushing a piece of hair back from his face.

He didn’t need air, but a breath caught in his open mouth anyway, His eyes, still so red, gazed up into yours.

He didn’t say anything. He didn’t need to.

“Bedroom.” You patted his face. “Clothes off.”

He shut his mouth, his eyes still impossibly wide. “Can I—”

“I’ll think about it.” You raised your eyebrows. “I told you bedroom, and I told you clothes off.”

He nodded, obediently taking his shirt off as he walked towards the bedroom, exposing his muscled back and quite frankly unfairly big arms. You hummed in appreciation.

He lay facedown on the bed and wiggled off his pants, pushing his ass in the air.

“Fuck, baby, so good for me, such a little slut.” You crooned, reaching for your strap on in the drawer.

He looked over his shoulder. “Are you—” He cut himself off with a whimper.

“Aww.” You said as you tighten the straps around your waist. “Stopping yourself, such a good boy.” You could’ve punished him for his slip up, but it’s so much fun to reward him, to fuck him senseless and then ride him till he’s begging to bite you.

He swallowed audibly, and you knew his fangs were out. He was turned on, he was painfully turned on, and he wanted not only to cum but to drink.

You were gonna let him, but not before some fun.

You reached for your lube, dripping some directly over his hole. You carefully slid one finger in. He clenched around you, whining.

“Does my slut like that?”

“Mhm.” He managed to get out.

You moved your finger a bit before removing it and going back with two. “You’re just sucking me in, aren’t you, baby?”

You added a third finger, and Changbin starts practically shaking, his arms strong enough to hold him but the sensation so powerful it overrode all that.

Changbin was submissive, but you’d never guess it from how he looked. He was big, strong; he looked every bit someone who’d manhandle you in bed, throw you around and fuck you. A vampire who’d bite you with a hard control.

But since that first time Changbin had asked you to fuck him, you hadn’t been able to see him as anything other than a needy mess. And he bit you with the desperation and fervor of a disciple worshipping their god.

You loved fucking him.

You didn’t love him. You just fucked him through his heats, let him bite you. That’s as far as it went.

Never mind that you’d begun hanging out with your mutual friends more just to see him. Or that you’d showed up at his place one night drunk out of your mind to fall asleep on his couch, because you felt safe there. Or that he’d showed up at your place drunk out of his mind to sleep on your couch because his friends had ditched him and your address was the only one he could remember.

You loved fucking him. You didn’t love him.

A confused, pathetic moan interrupted your thoughts. He was looking over his shoulder, whining as your fingers idly circled his rim.

“Oh.” You simpered. “You want me to fuck you.”

“Yeah.” He whined.

“Can’t just leave my little vampire needy like this.” You lubed up your strap, holding it to his hole. “Can I?”

You slowly began to push into him, stopping after a few seconds to let him adjust. “Should I stop here?”

“No, no!” He cried, pushing his face into the pillow, trying to quiet himself.

“Aww, don’t muffle yourself, baby. I want to hear you.” You pushed another inch inside him, wrenching a noise out of his throat.

“Okay.” He whispered.

“That’s a good boy.” You thrust the entire remaining length deep inside him, and he groaned, his back arching as he pushed up onto you.

“Fuck, fuck… fuck.” He panted as you readjusted.

You waited.

He whined. “Can you…”

“Can I…” You mocked, jerking your hips just a bit. “Use your words.”

“Can you fuck me?”

“You’re gonna have to ask prettier than that, baby. I know you can do it.”

“Please?” He said breathily.

You moved your hips a little. “More.”

“Please. Please, please fuck me.” He pushed his hips back, trying to get deeper on your cock. “Please, need it, need— ngh!”

You began to fuck him hard and fast, pushing your hips into his at a few different angles before a strangled cry informed you you’d hit what you were looking for.

You throbbed as you fucked him, the stimulation on your clit and pussy turning you on, but not as much as the sounds you got out of Changbin.

He was perfect, your perfect good boy.

Your hand found his back, tacky from sweat, and pushed it into the sheets. He moaned, arching even further into you.

“Fuck, good boy, good boy.” You pulled out of his ass, ignoring the wiggle of his hips as he chased you, and took off the strap-on. You rolled him onto his back and pushed it back inside him, not even bothering to detach the straps.

He moaned obscenely. “Need you to— need you on my— need your—”

“So fucking needy.” You groaned as you positioned yourself over his cock. “You’re gonna stay there, stuffed full, while I ride you, and then you’re gonna bite me.”

His pupils were huge in his red irises as he nodded. “Yes, yes, yes, please.”

You sank down on his cock, letting out a small noise of pleasure. He really did have a nice cock.

And a nice face, and a nice personality…

You were not catching feelings for him. No fucking way.

You started bouncing up and down on his cock, ignoring both the dull ache in your legs and your racing thoughts.

It didn’t take long for that strategy to work. You were the dominant in this situation, and both of you knew that, but you began to beg. “Changbin, God, need to cum on your cock.”

“Please cum.” His hands found your hips, gently holding them. “Please cum, I wanna cum, too, in you, while I bite you, while I drink—”

You leaned over him, tilting your head to expose your neck, your artery, your rushing pulse.

“Bite me when I cum.”

“Yes.” He whispered.

You rode him a little harder, watching his abs tighten as both of you came closer to your release.

“Changbin… now, bite me now!” You moaned, your hole clenching around him as you came.

His fangs dug into your neck, and you moaned even louder, rode him even harder, your eyes fluttering shut as your hands searched for anything to hold onto, settling on Changbin’s huge arms.

It hurt, but it felt so good, so intimate, so close, the two of you joined in multiple ways.

He came, too, his warmth filling you up, his jaw closing harder on your neck, pushing his fangs still deeper, drinking still harder.

You gave yourself completely over to him, moaning as he drank his fill from your neck. You felt lightheaded, and you couldn’t tell if it was from your release or the blood loss. Probably a bit of both.

He carefully pulled away from your neck, the motion jostling his cock inside you. One of his thumbs brushed over the twin holes he’d made on your neck, and he leaned forward again to lick a thick stripe over them.

You could get used to the feeling of his tongue, you thought.

You leaned in to kiss him.

That wasn’t something you’d done before. In all your hooking up, you’d never kissed Changbin.

But here he was, full up with a strap on, you wrapped around his cock, his mouth full of your blood, kissing you.

Kissing you.

This was a bad, bad idea. You shouldn’t fall for one of your friends, much less if he’s a vampire. Much less when you’ve been hooking up with him through his heats for the past few months.

But for as wrong as it was, his lips felt so good.

You pulled away. “Can we try this?”

Changbin blinked, his eyes gone more brown now. “Hm?”

“Can we try, uh, us. Can we go on a date or something?”

He blushed, your blood filling his cheeks. Somehow, knowing that made it more attractive. “Yeah, I’d really like that, y/n.”

You gave a small laugh. “Good… are you still….”

He nodded, looking away. “As you, um, as you know, the heats last… some time.”

“I do.” You kissed him again, hard. “And I’m always happy to help, no matter how long that may be.”

Ever Lovely - 1

Pairing~ Fae Prince!Bangchan x reader (afab/fem) x Fae Prince!Lee Know

Warnings~ Angst, cursing, crying, drinking, fae tricks, arranged marriage

WC~ 10k

Listen while you read: Runaway - Aurora

Masterlist // series masterlist

Next

Clink

Stomp

Slosh

Minho swore under his breath as he maneuvered through the crowded tavern. He was reminded of how much he hated humans. They were loud, brutish and they smelled god awful.That’s not to say he enjoyed the company of other fae folk much either, yet he would choose the members of the seelie and unseelie courts way before he would choose the companionship of humans. 

The fae prince settled into a booth in the corner, offering a sneer to the drunkard that bumped into his table, the beer the oaf was drinking splashing onto the table. Another thing Minho would never sully himself with is the vile swill that was the liquor of mortals.

But the man was not here of his own volitions. No- he was here to find his dear friend; the heir to the Court he resided in. His cat-like eyes scoured the room (one of the things his glamor could not hide), as he visually hunted for the crown prince. If there was one thing about Minho is that he had good eyes.

 The tavern was small and cramped, and full of people. There appeared to be some sort of celebration tonight that was rousing the towns folk but honestly Minho couldn’t care less what the occasion was, he just knew this was the type of place that he would likely find Chris. The elder had been gone for too long and some people were starting to ask questions. 

With one more glance over at the crowd he spotted him, the messy mop of curls being a dead giveaway. Well, that, and the light pointed tips at the end of his ears that he didn’t glamor away. Minho noticed that Chris seemed utterly entranced by something, his eyes shining brighter than the stars of his court and mouth curled up in a toothy grin, showing off his dimples. He followed his line of sight and was absolutely blown away by the sight in front of him. 

“Your highness, it’s time to awaken. Your presence is being requested in the main dining room.” 

The curtains that enveloped your room in darkness were yanked away, the shadows now being replaced by bright beams of sunlight. You groaned and pulled a pillow over your head, but that too was stolen from you by your maids. You were never much of a morning person but unfortunately your position demands you be up bright and early most days. 

“Your highness, I understand it is quite early, but his royal majesty will not remain patent for long.” Mara, your head maid who had raised you, pulled the blankets from your body swiftly. “So it is imperative that you make haste.” 

That woke you right up, sitting up in a hurry and your eyes wide. “My father has requested me? For what reason?” 

“I know not.” Mara answered, scuttling around gathering your corsage and silks. From her body language and the way she didn’t meet your gaze showed you she did know more than she let on. Mara was notorious for knowing all the gossip and information that flitted around the palace grounds- a trait she denied having. 

You narrowed your eyes slightly at the elder woman, rolling out of bed with a hearty ‘hmph’. You were quickly ushered around as the dressing team made you presentable, no matter how many times you insisted you would rather do it yourself. 

Your mind was running through all of the scenarios that could be the reason for your summons and it was making you grow anxious. You knew if you were being summoned like this then it must be something serious, and that thought made you grow anxious. The maids stood you in front of the  large standing mirror and Mara began to tightly lace up your basquine. She appeared troubled, with a furrow in her brow and an almost sad glimmer in her eyes. 

“Mara.” You began, keeping your voice low and sincere, “You can share your turmoils with me. What troubles you?” 

The elder woman chewed her bottom lip- another habit of hers and one you had taken on yourself- and breathed in deeply as she thought. Eventually she settled on denial. “The only thing that troubles me, your highness, is that you are clearly feeling finicky this morning and it will not end in your favor should you choose to bring it in front of his Majesty.” She finished tying your laces and then slipped your corsage on you. “There, all finished. Now you look most presentable.” 

You rolled your eyes dramatically, “Mara, you know I detest the title, especially from you.” The maid only huffed and shooed you out the door. 

You stepped out into the hall with a laugh and began to walk to the main hall, but Mara's voice stopped you. “Your highness,” You turned back around expecting another scolding but instead you were met with her wringing her hands in her apron and worry etched across her face. You had never seen her look so thrown. “Please, don’t say anything rash to your parents.”

 By parents you knew she meant your mother. The Queen. Or as you affectionately deemed her in your head, the royal bitch. You gave Mara a serious nod as a sign you understood and she waved you off once more. While her warning did nothing to calm your nerves, it did offer you a sliver of insight. Whatever this was about was your mothers idea. 

You took your time as you strolled through the castle, not in a hurry for what you were sure was about to be an uncomfortable chat. The walls of the castle were adorned with paintings of your ancestors, the past rulers of the kingdom scrutinizing you as you passed. Even though you had seen them a thousand times, as you grew up here, the marble statues and glistening crystal of the chandeliers never ceased to catch your eye with their beauty. As much as you hated being royalty, it was a magnificent place to live. 

You approached the large doors to the dining hall and the servants that were stationed there opened them for you. You thanked them with a light nod and entered to see your parents sitting at one end of the long dining table. Arranged before them were platters full of various pastries and meats and, of course, your father already had a goblet in hand filled with what you knew was wine… at half eight in the morning. Both of their heads turned to you as you entered the hall. 

“Y/n, how nice of you to finally join us, late as expected. Come sit. We have much to discuss this morning.” Right to the point as usual with your mother. 

Your father smiled at you, “Good morning, sweetheart.” 

You smiled back as you sat at the table beside him. “Good morning, father. Are you well this morning?” 

His grin turned nervous and his eyes flickered back to your mother- quick enough that you almost missed it- and he hummed. “As well as I can be, my dear.” 

“Enough chatter,” Mother put her bejeweled hand up to silence you before you could respond. You definitely understood why your father drank so much. It’s so he can put up with her. “Y/n, I am afraid I cannot sugarcoat this matter,” Since when has she ever sugar coated anything.. “But you are getting old.” 

That certainly was not where you thought this would go, “I beg your pardon?” 

“And because of your age our options are now limited,” She continued, “at your request we have delayed putting you on the marriage market, but we no longer have that luxury.” 

No. No, please don’t say what I think you’re going to say. 

You could feel your heartbeat quicken and the tremble in your fingers. 

“We thought that surely no one would want a woman at the age of five and twenty, practically a spinster, but luck seemed to be on our side.” Your mother had a pleased grin on her face. “You have received a marriage proposal. Prince Jungkook from the Southern Isle has requested your hand in marriage.” She clapped joyously, the sound filling the silence of the room. 

Your mouth was wide in shock and you had so many thoughts, too many to keep one coherent one, and your first reaction was to stand abruptly. Your chair fell backwards and to the floor as you stood, clattering to the polished marble. “I will not!” 

“Y/n” Mother lowered her voice in warning but you wouldn’t be deterred. 

“No! I do not even know Prince Jungkook! I cannot marry a man I do not love, let alone do not know. I refuse!” You stared now at your father. “Father, please do not let her do this.” You pleaded, eyes starting to fill with tears. 

He looked crestfallen and he cast his gaze down, “I’m sorry, love bug. For the good of the kingdom we must accept the proposal.” 

Now that absolutely broke your heart in two. The liquid that had been building on your lash line finally fell down your cheeks. Father had always been your favorite, the only blood parent to actually love you, and the only one who had ever been in your corner. It was his decree that you waited to marry until you had chosen your own suiter. It seemed like you had taken too long.

Your mother appeared smug as she tapped her long nails on the table. “Exactly. You should consider yourself lucky that such an esteemed Prince such as Jungkook has chosen you as the sow to produce his heir. And not just his heir, but the heir to this kingdom. In case you have forgotten you are an only child, and someone will need to rule once we are gone.Plus his kingdom is rich and yields much profit. Jungkook will be here by this evening. Tomorrow we shall begin the wedding preparations. If all goes to plan you will be wed in one week's time.” 

You dabbed your tears with the sleeves of your dress, caring not for decorum. “You are a vile, horrid woman. I will never forgive you for this, mother. And I will not marry him!” You did not wait for her reply before you stormed away back to the large doors. You could hear her behind you yelling your name and when you did not respond she started calling you an insolate brat. 

You ran all the way back to your chambers, ignoring any attendant who greeted you as you went. You yanked the door open and came face to face with Mara, who had been waiting for your return. Her own eyes had a sheen of crystalline tears, as she had known what was about to happen. 

“Oh Y/n.” Her voice broke and you threw yourself into her embrace, sobbing into her shoulder. The elder rubbed soothing circles on your back with one hand and used the other to stroke your hair. “My sweet girl, I am so so sorry.” 

“Mara,” You bawled, holding her as tightly as you could but she did not mind, holding you just as tightly to her. Mara had never had any children on her own, instead as your nanny since birth she cared for you and taught you and raised you as one of her own. Throughout your childhood you would stay awake at night, staring up at the night sky watching for shooting stars, wishing with every fiber of your being that you would wake up and your real mom would be Mara. Each morning you were disappointed to find your wish did not come true. “Mara, I cannot marry him. I cannot.” 

“Shhh, my dear, it’s alright. Everything will be alright. The stars shall align as they need too, and it will all work out just as it should.” She was holding back her own sniffles and she comforted you. As comforting as it was, you both knew there was no telling what events were about to unfold. 

You hadn’t uttered a word the rest of the time you sat in your chambers. Even as the maids bustled around you and dressed you in one of your finest gowns you remained silent. Thankfully the tears had stopped flowing by now but they almost began again as you could hear the whispers of the junior maids, talking about your upcoming engagement and squealing like children. They only stopped when they were scolded by Mara, the elder striking fear into them when she threatened them with chamber pot duty for the next month. 

You felt numb when you looked at yourself in the full length mirror for the second time today. Had it been any other occasion you would gush about how pretty you looked dawned in the sky blue gown with white trim (your kingdom's royal colors), but you couldn’t bring yourself to comment on it. A clopping of hooves could be heard from your open window that overlooked the grounds, a carriage was approaching. By the way the maids swarmed to the window and let out girlish squeals you could only assume that the Prince had arrived. 

It was no longer than ten minutes before there was a prompt knock at your door. “Your highness, I am here to escort you to the parlor promptly.” A slightly muffled voice called to you. It sounded like the main officer of the grounds, a man named Mingyu. Once upon a time you had been best friends, back in your teens when he was training for the royal guard. But as he climbed the ranks and became responsible for guarding the crown you had drifted apart. Now it has been years since you held a real conversation. You knew that he was sent to ‘escort’ you to the Prince to make sure you did not try to run away.

Mara squeezed your shoulders from behind in reassurance, “Remember dear, smile and nod. Do not give anyone the satisfaction of weakness.” You nodded and chewed on your lip. “It’s just a meeting and the announcement, easy enough.” 

“You are right, Mara.” You took a deep breath as she went and opened your door, showing you out. As you had guessed, it was indeed Mingyu who awaited you. He offered you a gentle smile and motioned for you to go ahead of him. “Hello, Mingyu. I trust you are well?” 

He nodded, “Yes, your highness. I am thankful to find myself in good health. And you, your grace?” 

“That is good. I am much the same.” There was an air of awkwardness as you walked, neither of you sure what to say- if you should even exchange words at all. All too soon you were standing outside the parlor room. “Thank you for escorting me, Mingyu.” 

 Before you could reach for the door handle his voice called to you, “Y/n,” You were startled to hear your name from his mouth, as he hadn’t said it to you in a long time. It had usually been your title and nothing else. You blinked up at him and could see the sullen look on your face. “I understand my word may mean nothing in this instance, but the prince seems like a good man. His officers speak highly of him.” 

You didn’t know what to say, so you gave him a tight lipped smile, “thank you, Mingyu.” He nodded and pulled the door open for you. You waited for the doors to be opened before you stepped into the room. Mingyu announced you officially as you entered. “Announcing the royal highness, Y/n, crown princess of Azura.” He bowed and closed the door behind you. 

You scanned the room quickly, seeing both of your parents speaking to another older looking couple who were dressed regally. You could assume they were the King and Queen of the Southern Isle. Standing beside them was a handsome man with dark hair and dark eyes. Prince Jungkook. You had only seen him in passing at balls in your youth, but never held a discussion with him. He looks older; his baby face had become a little more defined and his build was stockier.  

Your father was the first to greet you, standing at attention and coming to lead you further into the room. “Hi love bug, come meet our guests.” You nodded and followed him over.  You quickly wiped your sweaty hands on your dress as inconspicuous as possible but the glare from your mother told you that you were not as slick as you thought. “ King Junghyun, Queen Jeonywon and Prince Jungkook,  this is my daughter Y/n.” 

You curtsied low and lifted your hems from the ground, “It is an honor to meet you, your majesties.” 

“Such a polite girl.” The queen commented, eyeing you up and down. “Stand tall, let me get a good look at you my dear.”

 You straightened up and dropped your hems, plastering a smile on your face even though you felt like scowling. From a young age mother had instilled in you the biggest lesson a royal has to know- fake it until you make it. Don’t show weakness, and always keep a kind face. You looked only at the King and Queen, choosing to ignore the roaming gaze of the man standing beside them. 

The Queen strutted around you, taking mental note of your features. You jumped slightly at the sudden pinch she gave you on your hip, but otherwise remained still and silent as she poked and prodded. “Yes, she will do. Nice lower structure. Much suitable for birthing many babies.” You almost choked on your spit, eyes widening ever so slightly at her blatant conjecture. “Though her age leaves much to be desired.” 

As badly as you wanted to retort you knew better, instead choosing to bite your tongue. Hopefully this charade will be over soon. Your mother interjected instead, “ We understand her age is not ideal, but we can assure you our daughter is of utmost health, in both body and mind.” 

The other queen hummed, “Come, “She grabbed your arm and pulled you over to a small table that had a few cups of tea sitting there. “Let us chat whilst the men work out the details of the arrangement.” You nodded, allowing her to pull you and still making no attempt to look over to the man that was to be your betrothed. The two kings and crown prince went over to a desk and began to look over some official documents. 

Mother came and sat beside you, gesturing for a member of staff to pour some tea for the three of you. “My daughter is most accomplished, she has had the best tutors from all over the world come to teach her.” 

The other queen hummed again, taking a sip of her tea. “Tell me dear, can you read and write?” 

“Yes, your majesty.” You answered. 

“How many languages do you currently speak?” 

“Four, your majesty.” 

“And do you play any instruments?” 

“Yes, your majesty. I am most proficient in piano, violin, guitar and the harp.” 

“Excellent.” She clapped in joy. “My Kookie does love himself a good song on the harp.” Kookie..? “ In fact he is most fond of music, so in order to win his favor I suggest learning even more instruments. Can you sing?” 

Now this is where your passion lies. Your eyes visibly brightened and you nodded, “Yes your majesty. In fact I would say it is a great passion of mine, as well as danc-” 

She cut you off, “Wonderful. That will come in handy when it comes to soothing the children. Babies do love a soothing voice.” 

“Babies, your majesty?” You gulped, hiding your fear behind your tea cup.

“Of course. As many as possible. And as quickly as possible. We expect a new addition to the family to be born within the first year of marriage.” 

This time you actually choked, your tea coming back up and making you cough. Your mother handed you a handkerchief. “You must be more careful, Y/n.” She gave you a tight lipped smile and a death glare, then she turned to the other queen. “Please forgive her, her allergies are most bothersome this time of year.” 

She waved her hand, “It is no bother, I myself suffer from hayfever. Though we will have to get a handle on that before the wedding. We want it to be decorated bright and lovely, so there will be many flowers. We do not want her highness to be mucking up the event with sneezing.” 

“Yes of course, I will have the royal physician whip something up for her most hastily.” Your mother agreed, nudging you harshly with her foot, making you bite back a wince. “As for colors, I believe a fuchsia would be most agreeable with…” 

It was at this point you had tuned out the rest of the conversation. Instead your eyes were locked in on what was happening across the room. You watched as your father picked up the brand new quill from his desk, dipped it into a caveat of dark, murky ink and then dragged it across the parchment of a legal binding; sealing your fate. 

You watched as the King of the Southern Isle shook hands with your father, then clapped his son on the back in a congratulatory way. It was pitiful, really, the way everyone was in great spirits yet you have never felt more dread in your entire life. The pit in your stomach was heavy and for a moment you thought you might be sick. 

Both kings came up to where you were sitting, your father rested a hand on your shoulder, using his thumb to try to calm you down before a scene was made. “A date has been set. In seven days our kingdoms will be untied forever.” 

The two women you sat with cheered in delight, launching back into preparation talk. Another figure came and stood beside you, and this time you couldn’t help but to look. It was Jungkook. He offered you a gentle smile, but the happiness did not entirely meet his eyes. 

Before you could internally dissect that look on his face, you were interrupted by your father. “What do we all say for a spot of dinner? You three must be famished from your long journey here.” 

Your mother agreed, standing from her place and smoothing out her gown. “Indeed, we must all be well fed and rested for the royal announcement tonight.” 

Ah yes, of course. The royal announcement. Where you will have to stand before the people of the kingdom and declare your betrothal. Then everyone would know. Then there would be nothing else you could do to get out of it.  

Jungkook stuck his arm out for you to take, as you are now engaged and it is customary that he escorts you. “It would be my honor to escort you to dinner, your highness.” If you had known him better you would have said he seemed nervous. 

“Thank you, your highness.” You accepted his arm, and together with your families you went down to the dining room. 

There was a crowd of people as far as your eye could see. It appeared as though the whole kingdom had come to hear the announcement. As you stood together on a tall balcony overlooking the royal promenade you could only focus on the smiling faces of your subjects, how excited they seemed at the prospect of joining your two nations. Oh how you wished to be down there with them, being a part of your people instead of up here looking down at them. 

You and the Prince were locked arm and arm as you overlooked the crowd. It was still rather awkward, as you had not spoken more than a few words to each other since dinner. Not that you were paying much attention to him, or to the speech that the Kings were making. Instead you were daydreaming about what it would be like to be a normal person. No royal responsibilities, no imprisoning castle walls, no arranged marriages.. It was a dream you visited often. 

If you weren’t a royal then you may have been able to pursue your true passion. Performing. There was nothing you loved more than singing and dancing, putting on a show and making people smile. That was your calling, it was what you were born to do. That is why you often sneak out of the castle at night and into local establishments, singing songs of heroine tales and dancing the nights away with your subjects. It is the only thing that keeps you sane. 

A sudden burst of applause brought you out of your daydream and back to the scene at hand. The people were cheering and sending hearts up to you with their hands, showing their support for the upcoming nuptials. It made your heart sink even further when you thought of how happy they seemed, while you were miserable. The crown that sat upon your head had never felt heavier.

The two kings ended their speech by thanking the townspeople and wishing them a wonderful night. You were escorted back into the estate and you quickly let go of the prince's arm. His mother bounded over to you and wrapped you in a hug. 

“That went perfectly! You were excellent my dear, simple excellent. It seems like your people are very fond of you. That is good, it makes the transition easier.” She patted your cheeks and smiled at you. You could only nod, but even that was sluggish. “Oh poor thing, you must be exhausted. It is not everyday a lady gets engaged.” 

“Yes I quite think it is time for us all to retire for the night.” Your father agreed, “there is much to do tomorrow. Some sleep will be just what she needs. I will have my footman escort you three to your rooms.” The Jeon family bid you goodnight and you walked back to your chambers. 

The second you were alone behind closed doors you broke back into quiet sobs. Your hand covered your mouth so as to not let any sound escape and your back slid down the door until you were met with the floor. Thankfully you had requested no servants tonight. 

This was all too much. This restriction was too much, this objectification was too much, the expectation was too much. And so was this godforsaken gown. With angry and nimble fingers you tore the offending heavy fabric off of your body and threw it across the room. Your corset proved to be a more difficult task. As hard as you pulled you could not get it off and you let out a cry of frustration, your tears clouding your view and making it even harder to get the strings undone. 

After another minute of struggling you resorted to drastic measures and found a rogue pair of shears that one of your dressmakers must have left here, snipping away at the expensive fabric until it too fell to the floor. Finally you felt like you could breathe, the air filling your lungs as you threw the shears away from you. 

You put your hands on your chest and felt the harsh beating of your heart. You tried to take calming breaths and steady yourself. You knew all too well the signs of an oncoming panic attack and knew that that is the last thing you need right now. No, what you need is to get out of here. To get out of the castle and to be with your people, where you belonged. 

You wiped your eyes and began to search through your wardrobe for your simplest dress and cloak. You had stuffed them as far as you could the last time you had needed them, a mere four days ago. With quick efficiency you dawned the outfit, feeling more at home in the simple attire than your own usable wardrobe. It was a cute dark blue milkmaids dress that had light poofy shoulder sleeves and you paired it with a cloak of a similar color. 

Now all you had to do was wait. You knew that the servants would be heading to their quarters soon and that the castle would be still, that was when you would make your exit. Thankfully you did not have to wait long as within the hour the estate had fallen into silence and you could see from your window the changing of the guard. Perfect. The night guards were incredibly laxed with their job, often not paying attention or falling asleep on duty. That made them easy to squeak past. 

You took off your shoes and held them in your hand as you carefully and slowly opened your door, peering out into the hall and seeing no one. After closing the door you began to make your way through the halls, keeping your steps light and quiet as you stuck to the shadows. At this point you had done this so many times you knew how to get out of here like the back of your hand, and you had made it out with ease once again, slipping out a back entrance undetected. 

When you were far enough out the door you put your flats back on and began your journey into town. 

The whole town was alight with revelry. The streets were filled with merriment and everywhere you looked you saw people laughing and dancing. It seemed like they were more excited than even you had anticipated for the news of your upcoming nuptials. It both broke your heart and warmed it all at once. 

You made your way down the cobblestone streets and to your favorite place to visit; Tavern le belle. It was a quaint little establishment but it was usually filled with the kindest people, and also served the best honey mead in the whole kingdom. 

Tonight it was especially packed, each corner was filled with your subjects cheersing and bobbing along to the exuberant fiddle player that played upon the makeshift stage. You recognised the musician as the owner's young son, Vernon. It was like he knew you had entered as his beaming smile immediately beckoned you over, “Ann! Get on up here girl!” 

You returned his smile and bounded for the stage, climbing up and unceremoniously dropping your cloak to the floor. Ann was the name you used when you visited the townsfolk, easy to remember and common enough that you slipped under the radar. 

As soon as you stood upon the wooden stage you felt more at home, like you had never left in the first place and your feet started to move almost on their own. You began to twirl and dance along with the high energy song that Vernon was playing, feeling more free than you had all day. You pranced and stepped and moved like you were born to do, keeping up with the fast pace of the song as if you had done it a thousand times. 

Just as quick as it started the song eventually came to an end, the people cheering and clapping for you both. You were breathing hard and couldn’t wipe the smile from your face. 

“Ain’t she a great dancer, folks?” Vernon yelled out for everyone, and in return they cheered again. You felt your face heat up and you glared over at him. He snickered and continued. “ Well she’s also a great singer! How bout a song for the people, Ann? It’s a joyous occasion afterall!” 

He gave you no chance to respond before launching into another song, this time it was a little slower and one you instantly recognized. It was the first song you had ever sung here, those few years ago when you came here for the very first time. 

“I was listenin' to the ocean

I saw a face in the sand

But when I picked it up

Then it vanished away from my hands, dah” 

You began to sing, the soft first words catching the crowd's attention. 

“I had a dream, I was seven

Climbin' my way in a tree

I saw a piece of Heaven

Waitin' in patience for me, dah”

You closed your eyes, swaying with the music as you sang, before opening them again and going into the chorus. 

“And I was runnin' far away

Would I run off the world someday?

Nobody knows, nobody knows

And I was dancing in the rain

I felt alive and I can't complain 

But no, take me home

Take me home where I belong

I can't take it anymore” 

You danced around the stage, gliding on your toes gracefully already getting lost in the song. All eyes were on you as you moved. But you didn’t know exactly whose eyes were on you also.

There was nothing Chris liked more than human festivities. He found them much more fun than the dreary parties the fae threw. Chris had been itching to get away from the fae wild for a while, his court becoming too stuffy in the last few centuries- especially now that he had reigned over it. The prince hadn’t gotten out as much as he would have liked, really it’s been ever since his mother, the past ruler of the Court of stars, had died that he had come to the mortal plane to mess with the humans. Life had been too busy but he decided he deserved a night off. 

And how fortunate was he that he came on a day when the entire kingdom was celebrating. 

The sun was shining high in the sky when he crept out of the tunnel that led to the portal to his court, his pale skin feeling the pleasant warmth of its rays.  Another reason he loved coming here was to feel the sun- to bask in the fruits of his court's labor- as the sun is a much beloved star. 

Chris took in everything as he moved throughout the town, mingling with the people and ignoring the looks he received from his pointed ears. Chris never much cared to use a glamor, he found it wasted too much of his energy and he was not about to leave the celebration early due to his exhaustion. And he never gave two shits if a human were to suss him out, in fact he found it more amusing when they did. As he spent time galavanting around he learned that a major announcement was to come from the Royal family this evening and that is why the whole kingdom was abuzz. 

The fae prince thought about causing mischief but thought better of it, there was no reason to ruin anyone's fun on such an exciting day. He spent a few hours trying foods from stalls, taking in current human fashion and learning about the gossip that spread throughout the kingdom. Eventually his beloved sun had begun to set and the common people made their way to the royal promenade. He followed them in sheer curiosity and gathered amongst the crowd at the back. 

Even though he was furthest away from the announcement he could still see  and hear everything. His fae senses made it easy to see right up on that balcony. And what awaited his eyes was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. The princess of the kingdom of Azura. He couldn’t take his eyes off of you as you stood up there locking arms with a prince from another kingdom. As he listened to the speech that the rulers made he understood exactly what was happening here; this was your engagement announcement. 

Even from his place so far away he could see how fake the smile you had on was, it did not meet your eyes for even a second. Interesting. It must be an arranged marriage. He clicks his tongue as the event ends and he watches you turn and walk back into the castle. 

Chris wanted to see more of you and had debated making his way up there to meet you. It would be easy enough for him to climb that balcony,  but ultimately decided he would save that for another day. He was known for his impulsivity and here during a massive gathering of people was not the time for it. 

As he strutted through town he couldn’t get the image of you out of his head, his mind running over how he could see you again or if it was even a good idea to seek you out. One thing he never stopped to consider was why he wanted to see you again so badly. The prince shook his head in an attempt to clear his thoughts. He needed a distraction- some fae fuckery and a drink was in order. 

He saw he was approaching a young child and his mother. The boy was maybe about three years old. Chris gave the young boy a small wave and a smile, then out of thin air he made a small lollipop. The small boy reached up and took the candy from Chris, his mother not paying close enough attention to see her son take the candy from a stranger. Chris ruffled his hair and kept on walking with a devilish smirk on his face as he counted down. 

3..2..1

“Hot! Too hot!” The child screamed, throwing the sucker to the ground and starting to cry. 

The fae snickered as he listened to the chaos the child was causing behind him. For a fae trick it was pretty tame, but having not messed with humans in centuries it scratched the itch he felt in his blood. 

There was a crowded little tavern that looked inviting, the low light from the fireplace and the jaunty music pulling him in. He went up to the bar and ordered a drink from the kind old woman behind the bar. The fae prince illusioned a few gold pieces and set them on the counter, then grabbed his drink and went to find a spot near the stage. 

The mead was sweet as it ran down his throat, decent for human made but still not as good as mead from the fae wild- though he figured the mortal realm didn’t have honey goblins. And everyone knew you can’t have good alcohol without honey goblins. 

He was enjoying people watching when his ears twitched with the sound of someone climbing up onto the wooden stage. He casually peered over and the sight made him freeze. It was you. The girl he couldn’t stop thinking about. The princess.

 Chris watched as you started dancing, now sporting the lively smile you were missing the last time he laid eyes on you. He sat there for a second just observing how different you appeared. You were no longer wearing the fancy gown you wore for the royal announcement, instead you were wearing a modest commoners dress, but it didn’t make you any less beautiful. In fact, he thought you looked even more radiant. You looked free. 

“Ain’t she a great dancer, folks?” the fiddler called out, making the tavern cheer. Chris himself clapped and hollered along with them. “Well she’s also a great singer! How bout a song for the people, Ann? It’s a joyous occasion afterall!” 

Ann? Was he mistaken and this wasn’t the princess? No. It was you, he was sure of it. You must be using a fake name so you could remain undetected. Clever girl. Using fake names was definitely something he understood. 

The musician started playing another song, this time it was a slower piece. He watched as you began to hum and sway before you began to sing the words. He found your song haunting and enchanting, the pure emotion pulsing through him as you sang. Chris felt himself smiling as you danced, seemingly caught in a trance as he couldn’t take his eyes off of you once again. A prick in the back of his mind went off and his senses told him he was not the only one to be caught by you. 

Chris let his eyes flick over to the other side of the tavern and sure enough there was Minho, gazing up at you in awe just as he had. The elder knew that Minho had probably come here to find him. 

Minho had never thought a human could be this gorgeous. He usually found them plain and unappealing. But you.. You were something special. One look at you on that makeshift stage and he was hooked. He took in everything, the way you moved, the twinkle in your eyes and especially the sway of your hips. Though he would never admit it to anyone- especially Chris, who as far as Minho could tell was also under your spell. 

“ But I kept runnin' for a soft place to fall

And I kept runnin' for a soft place to fall

And I kept runnin' for a soft place to fall

And I kept runnin' for a soft place to fall”

Your voice quieted only slightly as the tune transitioned into a softer tone, then it picked up again and you leaped from the stage onto a nearby table.

“And I was runnin' far away

Would I run off the world someday?

But no, take me home

Take me home where I belong

I got no other place to go

No, take me home

Take me home where I belong

I got no other place to go” 

By now you had the whole tavern singing along with you, each patron belting out the lyrics and stomping to the beat. It was truly a sight to behold as your singing touched every person in there. Both boys couldn’t help but be proud of you. 

“No, take me home, home where I belong, no, no

No, take me home, home where I belong, oh, oh, oh

No, take me home, home where I belong, no, no

No, take me home, home where I belong

I can't take it anymore” 

You were breathing heavily as you finished the song, still standing on a table with the brightest smile on your face that you just could not wipe away. You had not felt genuinely happy in what feels like years. There really was no better feeling in the world than being here with your subjects and sharing in their joy. 

The crowd was cheering for you and you made a show of doing a dramatic bow, crossing your ankles and sticking your arms out wide. 

“Another song, Ann?” Vernon called out to you but you hastily shook your head. 

“Maybe a little later, Vern. I need a minute to catch my breath. Plus some of that mead is calling my name.” You replied as a man helped you down from the table. You thanked the man as Vernon began to play another solo song. Your mouth was dry so you scurried through the crowd, thanking everyone who praised your performance. 

Chris moved to follow you but there was a sudden hand on his shoulder that stopped him from going any further. Chris rolled his eyes as he turned around. “Hello Min. To what do I owe the pleasure?” 

Minho let his hand fall from the elders shoulder and he crossed his arms. “Spare me the pleasantries, Chris. You haven’t been home in a while.” 

Chris huffed, “I’ve only been here for five hours.” 

“Exactly. Five hours here. Which you know as well as I do that means five weeks in our realm. Far too long for the prince to be gone.” Minho responded, seemingly exhausted by this conversation already. 

“I am not the only prince now am I? There’s you and the others. I know you all are perfectly capable of managing without me for a while.” Chris was starting to get snarky. 

Minho hummed, “Yes, but we’re not the ones that other courts call upon when they require a meeting.” 

That had gotten Chris’ attention. “Who wants to meet with me?” 

“The Court of Wonder.” Minho grumbled, clearly not happy about it. 

“Ah, Pricilla.” Chris wanted to roll his eyes again, tired of the same song and dance with the Seelie queen. “She’ll never quit. How long did it take you to get her to leave?” 

“Four days.” They both grimaced. “The fit she threw was deafening. But you know she will come back and will not take no as an answer again. You must return with me now.”

The elder prince groaned, “Ohhh come on! Let’s stay just a little bit longer.” Then he smirked at Minho. “Don’t act like you don’t want to stay here, either. Not when there's a pretty little princess that caught your attention.” 

Minho looked away for a second then narrowed them at Chris. “I have no idea what you mean.”

“Of course. I just could have sworn I saw the enchanted glaze over your eyes as you watched her. My mistake. I guess I shall just go talk to her by myself.” Chris turned away and took a single step when he felt the hand back on his shoulder as his movements were halted. 

There was a brief second of silence between them, then Minho spoke up with a quiet tone. 

“A princess you say?” 

You got to the bar and ordered. Just before you could put down some money for the drink a pale hand reached out and stuck a few gold pieces on the counter. 

“It’s on me.” 

You turned to face a very handsome man that stood on the left side of you now. His hair was dark brown and a mess of wavy curls and his voice was husky. There was a glimmer in his eyes and he looked you right in your own orbs, you could see a faint flicker of what seemed to be.. Purple? A small purple shine. No it must just be a trick of the light. You turned back to the bar to hide the shy expression on your face.

“Oh no, I couldn’t possibly let you pay for me.” You tried to wave him off as you put your own money down but a hand stopped you, grabbing your wrist before you could. Your eyes widened in slight shock that someone had put their hand on you and you were about to tell them off but as you turned to the side you saw that it was another man. Another beautiful man. 

“Do not fret, we have you covered.” The new one practically purred. His features were sharp and borderline catlike. His gaze was raking you over and it felt like he was looking into your soul. When he came back up to meet your eyes you could see a flicker of a deep glow. But just as quick as it came, it was gone. 

An almost erie feeling came over you with these two near you, but for some reason the warning bells in your mind weren’t going off even though you knew they should be. 

“That is very kind of you, thank you gentlemen.” You chose your words carefully and accepted the offer. A glass was put down in front of you. The barkeep, Donna, winked at you as she put it down. You immediately put the glass to your mouth to hide your embarrassment. A snicker from each man made you want to bury yourself underground. 

They were definitely the best looking men you had ever encountered (and that’s saying something because you were friends with Mingyu) and you honestly did not know what to do under their stares.

 Although something about their appearance was slightly unsettling. You couldn’t put your finger on it but something was.. Off. Maybe it was that their eyes were too big or that their cheekbones were too sharp. Or maybe it was even the first ones lightly pointed ears.  Perhaps it was best that you got out of here before you brought more shame to yourself. “If you would please excuse me.” You went to take your drink and go but a quip from the man to your left stopped you. 

“Leaving so soon, Princess?” 

A chill went down you as you looked at the man. “I- I’m sorry I think you may have me confused with someone else.” 

The other man chuckled, stepping closer to you. “I don’t think so, our eyes aren’t easily fooled my dear Y/n.” 

So there was something wrong with these two. It wasn’t just a trick of the light. 

You slowly set back down your drink and took a small step back as your mind ran wild with thoughts and ultimate doom. Mara used to tell you stories when you were a child. Stories of monsters, stories of mysterious deities who acted as tricksters, stories of faeries.

 You clutched the hems of your dress as you debated running and seeing how far you could go but your thoughts were interrupted. “You are a smart girl, aren’t you? You’ve already realized something about us.” 

You vehemently shook your head, trying to deny the truth that they already knew. The one with the catlike eyes hummed quietly, “Calm down, we only want to chat with you. You owe us since we bought you that drink.” 

That’s right. One of the things Mara told you was that never accept anything from a faerie or you will owe them something in return, of their own choosing. There was no way to get out of a fae deal, lest you suffer a terrible fate. 

“What would you gentlemen like to discuss?” You asked, trying to remain calm. 

“Not here, too many ears and eyes here. Let’s head outside.” The man with the pointed ears grabbed your hand and began to lead you outside. Your whole body was aflame and his skin touched yours. You had never held hands with a man before. If anyone were to see you then there would be a major scandal that you may never recover from. You were able to breathe a sigh of relief when you exited the pub and turned the corner of the building to see no one there. “Here we are, much better.” 

“Now what is it I can do for you?” You questioned and took your hand out of his, albeit reluctantly. 

“I want to know why an elegant princess such as yourself is out here mingling with the commoners and going under an alias.” Catlike man said.

“I-” You stuttered, clearly haven been found out. “I just.. Needed to get out.” 

“Does it have anything to do with your recent engagement?” The other one asked. 

“That’s not fair.” Your own voice surprised you, “You asked me something now I get to ask you something, right?” 

The two men exchanged looks then grinned at you, “Of course, ask your question.” 

“Who are you?” 

“My name is Chris, this is my good friend Minho.” 

The catlike man waved his fingers at you as he was introduced. “Nice to meet you, princess.” 

“Nice to meet you too.” You felt shyer after learning their names, but you still had a burning question. “What are you?” 

Chris tsked, “Nuh uh, our turn. Are you upset about your engagement?” 

You chewed your lip and looked down, biting back the painful truth. “Yes..” You eventually mumbled. 

“Ask your question now, princess. We shall be truthful.” Minho promised and offered you a smile. Another thing you had been told about supernatural beings is that they cannot lie- at least not directly. Though who knows how much of what you were told was the truth and what was hearsay. 

“What are you?” You asked again, feeling no ease when they each offered you devious toothy grins. 

Chris took one step closer to you and slowly brought his hand up to play with your hair. Your breath was caught in your throat and your body froze as he ran his fingers through the locks. He leaned in closer until his mouth was mere inches from your ear, and he let his eyes flare with a purple haze, “Faeries.” 

Your eyes widened with the information that you had already suspected and a gasp was stuck in your throat. The word kept replaying over and over in your head. 

Faeries

Faeries

Faeries

Even though you should be scared, you did not feel fear. Instead it was more like gentle unease at the fact that creatures other than the basic lifeforms you had grown to know were lurking and you had no idea. Why are they here? Do they wish to harm me? How many are there? Do they ha-

“Are you scared, princess?” Minho asked, also taking a step closer to you, so close you could feel this warm breath on your neck. 

You took a pause before answering. “No.” 

“Hm. I believe you.” Chris let go of your hair but did not make a move to give you space. “A princess as regal as you would never tell a lie.” 

You jumped right into your next question, “Are there more of you?” 

Minho looked around, “Here right now? No. But back in the wilds there are many of us.” At your confused face he continued, “The fae wilds, princess. Our realm, where we have our own court.” Minho looked pointedly at Chris. “Which we really should be getting back to.” 

It was then that you noticed how late it had become. “Oh my goodness, it is getting too late. I must return home before anyone notices I’m gone.” 

Chris grabbed your arm gently, “But we are not done talking. I wish to know more about you.” 

You shook your head, “I apologize but I must make haste back to my chambers. It would be ruinous if I were to be found out of bed in the morning.” 

“Come back to our realm with us.” Ever the impulsive Chris blurted out. 

“Chris..” Minho tried to warn but the elder would have none of it. 

“Come to our court, time works differently there and we will have all the time in the world to talk.”

“I-” You stuttered, giving him an incredulous look. “I do not think that to be wise, I must go to bed-” 

“Please. As I have said we would have all the time to talk. We-” Minho sent him a glare. “I would be happy to tell you anything you want to know about me and our world. I know you're dying with curiosity.” 

He was right, you were dying to know more about them. “What do you mean time works differently there?”

“Our world moves much quicker than yours does. An hour here is a week there. That is why we must also get back to our own court, Chris has been gone for far too long and needs to return to his business.” Minho flicked the elder. 

“That is incredible. What business do you have over there?” You asked but he shook his head. 

“Nuh uh, if you want answers you're going to have to follow us back to the wilds.” He smirked and stuck out his hand for you to take. “So what do you say, princess? Wanna live on the wild side? You did sing a song about running away. Now’s your chance.” 

You eyed his hand, weighing your options. You knew that you should go home- that you should leave what would surely become a mess and forget this ever happened. That would be the smart thing to do. 

But.. 

Your heart yearned for adventure, yearned to escape for a while even if it were temporary. “Will you bring me home whenever I request it?” 

“I promise. Should you utter the words that you would like to return we shall bring you. You have my word.” 

Minho was still watching the exchange. He wouldn’t pretend he did not also want to spend more time with you - you had already proved yourself to be the most interesting human he had ever met- but he was worried about the repercussions. He knew how dangerous his realm could be and how masochistic his own court could be at times. It would be a recipe for disaster. But technically even though he too was a prince he could not deny Chris’s wishes.  So he kept his mouth shut. 

He watched as you mulled over your options, and then gently placed your hand in Chris's hand.

“Deal. Lead the way.” You said, looking between the two of them. 

Chris started to lead you away, his hand still in yours as Minho trailed behind, your cloak clutched in his hold. He sped up and handed it to you, “Put this on, princess. Our court is a little cold.” 

“Thank you.” You slipped it on and continued to follow them. “You guys keep mentioning a court, do you mean a royal one?” 

“Oh yes, there are many courts within the fae wild. Each has their own monarchy and sets of rules. Some are better than others.” Minho answered, his eyes seemed to glow brighter the closer you got to the portal. 

“Which court do you come from?” 

Now they both looked a little excited, both sets of orbs shimmering and glowing. “The best one of course. The Court of Stars.” 

“Wow. Stars, like the ones in the sky?” 

“Indeed. You’ll love it there, it is the most beautiful place in all of the wilds. You’ll fit right in.” Chris winked at you and you felt your ears heat up. 

“I cannot wait to see it.” You ignored his comment. While walking you noticed you were getting closer and closer to the castle grounds. “I thought you were taking me to your realm, why are we going to my home?” 

“The entrance to our home lies beneath yours.” Then they veered off the path to the side of the grounds and into the surrounding woods. You still diligently followed them, after another minute or so they led you to a mysterious set of stairs that seemed to lead to nowhere. 

“Where did this come from? I’ve been around the grounds a thousand times and have never seen this staircase before.” You looked around confused, eyeing it suspiciously. 

Minho snickered, “Humans can’t see the entrance unless we want them too. I think your people call it a ‘fae trap’.” 

They took your hands and led you down the bizarre steps. The steps went down further than you could have expected, and after about three minutes of walking down the steps you entered a room. No, not a room. An indoor garden. 

Vines that were littered with small pink flowers covered the gray brick walls and arches, and the flowers seemingly got brighter and bigger the farther you ventured into the space. Many candles with a violet flame littered the ground. A light purple haze covered the air, the swirling air was moving through the garden as if beckoning you further in. Subconsciously you gripped tighter onto the two fae’s hands. At the very center was a tree- a  dark gray birch tree. It had no leaves on it but it still looked full and healthy somehow. But the most defining part was how it glittered. The bark shined like diamonds. 

Chris stepped up to the tree and put his other hand up, stopping only a mear inch away from touching it, and turning to look at you. “Are you ready?” 

You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. You felt Minho lightly squeeze your hand and it helped calm you for some reason. 

You slowly opened them and gave both boys a smile. 

“I’m ready for adventure.” 

Chris nodded and with one last look into your eyes, he pressed his palm against the bark of the glittering tree. 

It's here! yall i am so excited to share this series with you i have had this idea in my head for months

as always comments and reblogs are encouraged and appreciated 💖 please share your thoughts i love to hear them

beta read by my loves @jehhskz and @athforskz 💜

©doitforbangchan 2024

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I Can't Lose You-Masterlist

ALL WORK IS UNDER ME AND MY BLOG. DO NOT TRY TO REPUBLISH OR STEAL MY WORK, AS THAT IS COPYRIGHTED UNDER ME AND IS CONSIDERED COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT. 

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Please read each warnings carefully and heed them. This fanfic will have angst themes and later more adult content. Read the warnings and Follow them!

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

Part 7

I WON'T LOSE YOU (ICLY 7.5)

Part 8

Part 9

Part 10

Part 11

ALL MINE (ICLY 11.5)

Part 12

Part 13

Part 14-Under Construction...

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When Home Becomes You

| I have no idea how to use this app. Please bear with me as I learn.

/ Day one of this. I forewarn I have a busy work schedule post will be vastly irregular.

/ These boys have saved my life this year. Other writers have aided in that love for them (fictional and non)

/ Genre: fluff, (for now)

/ Warnings: swearing. Changbin kinda swears a lot here. Minor injury. Anxiety. Chapter one in LONG (sorry..)

/ Summary??: Mistakes happen, all the time in fact. He knew that, his team knew that. The dancers, staff, managers, security, to heck you get it they all knew mistakes happen. So Changbin didn’t understand why this mistake, this small error had begun to eat him up since the moment it happened

/ reminder: this is a work of fiction. I love these boys but nothing I or other writers depict is true about them. Also please don’t steal my work took a lot of courage to put this out here 👀👀

Mistakes happen, all the time in fact. He knew that, his team knew that. The dancers, staff, managers, security, to heck you get it they all knew mistakes happen. So Changbin didn’t understand why this mistake, this small error had begun to eat him up since the moment it happened. The concert was great, the usual adrenaline acted as added fuel to their jet lagged bodies. Something about America, or International STAYS was different. To him it was the air, crisp, maybe a touch dryer than home. Yet so refreshing. Rehearsal had gone fantastically, best they’d had. Everyone was on fire. Hyunjin was giving his all even just for practice. So when the concert began and the roar of the crowd could be heard as the intro began he was ready. His body bristled with anticipation, the desire to do his best flowed into his core.

Changbin allowed himself one more moment to hear his beloved STAYs before he settled his in-ears into place. His focus dived, almost tunnel like as he stepped foot onto that stage. He felt alive, every nerve ending lighting with the familiar choreography. He didn’t, couldn’t think he just existed. A space where everything in him felt on yet off. So beyond anything he could ever explain. The thrill of doing something he loved so purely. Then it happened. This one small moment. As one song drifted into the next they were on fire, he’d have to admit out of this tour he loved this performance best. STAYs made him feel so raw and so alive. His opening for My Pace began, he knelt down at the forefront of the stage. Carefully he leaned close to see the crowd at the rail. He did this every concert. With a smile beaming ear to ear he wished he could hear the crowd could hear his STAY. Then in a flash that joy was gone, one single misstep. A dancer fell out of their line, and that’s all it took. The next thing Changbin knew was a blur of movements. In order to catch himself he aimed for a set speaker to his right, missing entirely as he tumbled down off the stage. The momentum of his body sent him right for the railing the crowd stood at. Screwed wasn’t really the word he was looking for at that moment. But it’s entirely what he felt. Screwed.

Hands grabbed at him in all directions as he felt the cold metal rails meet his torso. Gods he loved STAY, but they were unnerving sometimes. The seams of his stage costume began to make a horrid sound. The clambering of hands that grabbed at Changbin began to become overwhelming. Soon he was being dragged over the rail into the crowd. Panic began to creep into him. How in the hell was he going to get out of this?? Suddenly he was yanked back, his body pulled from the hands of the crowd. When he looked up he sighed with relief, a familiar body guard had yanked him free of the people by his collar. When he turned back to look at the crowd there was this woman. Small in stature. Her entire being a guard between him and the wound up crowd of STAY. Then she turned hair whipping in its low ponytail as she gestured to him to get back. He took two steps but his eyes never left hers. “Changbin!!” The call of his name drew his attention away from her. Back to the stage. Chan was there hand over the edge. He took it getting back up performing like it had never happened at all.

Just like that he was back under the hot lights of the stage rapping his heart out to his beloved fans. The same fans that so quickly tried to eat him alive. An exaggeration sure, but he couldn't describe how else the feeling was. People pulled him left right, his body entirely out of his own control. If it weren’t for the body guards he was sure he would have been swallowed up by STAY. Daring a glance back he saw her again. It was remarkable, maybe she wasn’t that small. But there wasn’t much mass to her. Not like himself or the 6ft tall body guard that had yanked him free of the crowd. Shit he’d been staring too long, way too long. She noticed her head whipped around, her dark eyes met his. Changbin felt his breath catch in his chest as she stared back at him, her head cocked to one side. The way her hair swayed reminded him slightly of a puppy discovering something new. Then she spoke, her lips drawn tight before she mouthed something. He must have made a face, because she repeated herself and he understood.

“Are you okay??” she had asked, or really mouthed. A strange bubbling filled the pit of his stomach as he gave her a sheepish smile and nodded. It was pure adrenaline that had kept him going on that stage. As they exited he was still high off it, his feet bouncing left to right he wanted, no needed more. The energy was felt between them all, each of the 8 men buzzed with the after show high. They all sobered up a little as a dancer filed into the dressing room head bowed deeply as he apologized to Changbin for his mistake.

“No sweat, just watch yourself next time. Keep your line. I’ll be more careful too,” as the dancer slipped back out Changbin shook his head pulling the hem of his stage shirt loose from his pants. Half of them were already undressed when a soft knock came at the door. It wasn’t familiar to him. Their managers usually “knocked” as they entered, waving at them to hustle up. Dancers were usually louder, for they knew the boys always had a high volume rate. So this knock was new, gentle, and almost unheard among the banter of the room. Strangely he heard it loud and clear. Shirt in hand he walked over swinging the door open to find her..Under the dark stage lights he couldn’t really see her. Too bright over his face, and the house lights always dimmed for their stage. But here, in the warm fluorescents he could see you. To his surprise he had to look down. It was ever so slight but his chin tipped further to the floor to look at you, take you in.

One of your hands was still raised to what he presumed was to knock at the door once more. It lowered at the sight of him coming to fold at your chest. Shit, were they too loud?? Had you come to ask them to shut up..Yeah that wasn’t happening. Your stance was wide, feet shoulder length apart keeping your balance even. A stance he knew well from all his weight training over the years. Your eyes met his looking up through the hair that sat over your face. That look, a look many had given him before, a look many will give him again. But when you did, when you looked at him like that, the deep chocolate color stole his breath. A shiver wracked his spine. He swore in that moment no one had ever looked at him like that, never before, and never again will they. Not like you had irises cast slightly up in your rounded eyes, brows furrowed just the tiniest bit. “Uhh,” he gathered undignified..Shit he probably needed Chan. No chance in hell did you speak Korean, and there was no way he was going to fumble his way through English to try and speak to you. That was a given. So he had to will himself to look away from you, away from your pretty face to get his leader just to speak to you. Gods he wanted to speak to you. Just as he built up the courage to turn his face away and call for Chan you spoke.

“How’re your ribs??” you asked..in Korean. Well shit. Looks like he can speak to you..that was a surprise. A quite pleasant one in fact.

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The Pompous Lawyer II

Pairing: Changbin x afab!reader

Word count: 13.7k (WOOPS FR THIS TIME)

Genre: enemies to lovers

Warnings: 18+ explicit minors do not interact. Choking, kissing, arguing, mentiosn of naked body, handjob (m receiving), penetration, orgasm, dirty talk.

Tag list: @seo--changbin @j-0ne25 @cb97whoree

@kpopsstuffs

Note: HEY guys, its been a while. This took me a long time to write i am very much sorry :(((( I hope you enjoy and i hope everyone is doing well. I also appreciate all the support that I have received in my absence as well <3 Inspo is (here) (also psa thats literally visual porn you have been warned!!)

Summary: The case had not progressed, seeing as the two of you chose to spend the time together doing something else. But going back to the bickering enemies you were before may be harder than it seems.

The smirk on Felix’s face was apparent when he saw you walk into the break room, ready for another day of work. At this point in time, it was best for you to ignore his presence, you wanting to at least enjoy one sip of coffee before being berated.. It was also your luck that he was enjoying a light hearted chat (or so you thought) with your rookie, Hyunjin, out of all people, before they both went silent, waiting for you to take up the empty seat at their chair. Your best friend’s mouth was already open before your elbows could even relax on the table.

“Did you do it or not?”

A hand came to your chest as you rapidly placed your cup on the empty table, leaning forward as the liquid barely had time to swallow before choking, hard, the coffee going every pathway except your throat.. 

“That’s the first thing you ask at your grown up age?”

He shrugged, unbothered by your criticism as he continued looking, waiting for an answer to his ludicrous question. You had two options; lie and tell Felix that it was just a brief consultation, leaving him with no further questions and him continuously being suspicious, or tell him the truth and live a life of never ending embarrassment. 

“Just answer Y/n.”

Hyunjin had never received a death glare so terrifying in his life. 

“Is that how you talk to your T.O?”

“Stop deflecting,” Felix whined, hitting you on the knee, “did you do it or not?”

“No,” you laughed, the exaggeration of your chuckle making it obvious that you were lying, “it was just a brief consultation and beginning of preparation for the trial seeing as it’s next week.”

“Sure it was,” the rookie smirked, tongue poking the inside of his cheek before you stormed out of the room; being ganged up on wasn’t something that you wanted to deal with right now. Sitting at your desk and recording a stack of torturous paperwork was somehow much better than your best friend and rookie prying into your personal life,, together. 

It did not take long for them to follow, forgetting the convenience being that your desks were right next to each other. You decided to ignore them, letting your fingertips type away on the raised keys in front of you. It was only a matter of time before you knew that there would most certainly be a time where you had to face the consequences of your actions. Did you regret it? The logical part of you was saying a little. This had to be some sort of conflict of interest, any kind of vocabulary that could be applied to this situation was being applied. Mixing business and pleasure was probably not the greatest idea. Wanting to take back what happened yesterday evening would be the right thing to do; but being smart was tiring. Letting your brain shut off for a brief moment to enjoy the pleasures of life that was physical gratification from your enemy really wasn’t so bad, right? It was nice for now, mainly because it was all you had roaming around in your mind. 

That was, of course, until you saw the wide doors of the precinct open, and saw the pompous lawyer, with his ridiculously priced suit, compromising shirt that showcased way too much, and that stupid briefcase that had the gold plating on the exterior seams. God, it was so fucking annoying. The way you knew that your eyes would immediately dart to his handsome features. His sharp eyebrows, slicked back hair, his lips. Fuck. His lips were something you already noticed prior to your rendezvous, but now it was a whole different story, with a whole new meaning behind it. His walk was elegant, like all of a sudden he changed the way he strutted, still like he owned the place, but for some reason it wasn’t as annoying. You were kidding yourself if you were unaware of why your perception had changed so suddenly. Your eyes quickly darted back to the computer screen. It was better to ignore him at the station. All the officers had spoken before, and you would rather truly die than for it to come out here, from him, or you in the heat of the moment, out of all places. It was also just less of a mindfuck. Not having Changbin in your sight was not going to leave your mind trailing to what might be. 

“Y/n quick Changbin is here!”

“Fuck,” you mumbled under your breath, “if he asks tell him I’m not here.”

Your fall to the floor was sudden, hitting the top of your head in the process. The thud could be heard from a mile away, the painful groan following as well. It wasn’t a coincidence that you were under the huddle of your desk, and the name of the pompous lawyer had been mentioned. When you were back on your knees, visible to your coworkers, cussing them out seemed like the perfect option.

“Are you guys fucking serious-”

“Y/n?”

The anxiety in your stomach rose when you heard Changbin’s voice. The pompous lawyer was standing right there, and boy, did he catch you red handed. You were facing him, eyes at length with his own as you looked up at him. That smirk. That used to be the evil fucking smirk that now makes the hairs on your arms raise straight up in stature. The spiral was immense, immediate as soon as your eyes were on him. From the time you left his office last night, to when you drove home, ate your dinner, slept, woke up, and came to work. It was easy to be in denial. Easy to never come to the realization of ‘holy fuck I slept with someone I hate.”

But when the situation, AKA, Changbin, was staring you in the face, the feeling of denial was practically non-existent. All the memories of him flooded back in an instant. A heavy gulp swallowed in your throat, eyes wide as he continued to ponder down at you, and you hated that your mind immediately went to the gutter, mouth watering at the implication of being on your knees in front of this man. You could even see the pompous lawyer clench his jaw for a brief moment, another immediate shift in his demeanor as his eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“Are you hiding under the table?”

“What? No I,” you huffed, not protecting your head and hitting it, again, one hand holding the base of your head, the other leaning on your desk to help you rise back to your feet. God this was fucking embarrassing, and your two cowokers snickering behind you was not helping the embarrassment at all.

“I just dropped my pen.”

The pompous lawyer crouched down, bending his knees all the way as his eyes scanned the indoor concrete flooring, not a pen in sight. His devil coated smirk covered his face as soon as his knees came back 180 degrees. Fuck your life. That fucking smirk! Before, it was the bain of your existence. The sole reason behind your anger and overall frustration with arrogant lawyers, district attorneys; basically anyone that you had to work with that wasn’t police or innocent civilians. But now, that smirk carried so many connotations. The flashbacks were immediate as you tried so hard to suppress and deny the ideas flooding your brain like a dam wall when there is a rain storm. Your heart rate accelerated, and the temperature of the precinct suddenly felt a little too hot. All you could do was stand there, looking at him wide eyed, knowing exactly what he was going to say.

“I didn’t see any pens there.”

“Hello Changbin,” Felix chimed in, a rather unusual grin when looking at the pompous lawyer, “how’s the trial prep going?”

The smirk on his face dropped immediately. The color drained from his face, the complexion of a ghost-like complexion covering his skin. He was now panicking, bad. There had been no time to get your stories straight. Did Felix know? Did he not? Changbin had way too much pride to tell a stranger, let alone someone he knew was your close friend, to him, about his private life. One that involved colleagues and criminal justice moreso. He also found it strange. Strange that Felix firstly used his name without mumbling it under his breath, and secondly, actually asking a question, inquiring about something that had nothing to do with him. The look of stress was a sigh of relief, knowing that the pompous lawyer completely forgot that he had caught you out.

“Uh good,” he quickly acknowledged, giving Felix his attention for all of 10 seconds, before turning to you again, “I actually came here to talk to you about that.”

“Oh,” you nodded, nothing remotely close to a smile, “can we talk later today? I just have a lot of paperwork that I need to get done by patrol time which is in,” you paused, taking a quick glance at the digital watch on your wrist, “1 hour.”

Changbin let out a nervous laugh.

“You can’t talk now?”

“No,” you huffed, “I just said that. Surely there is another reason you’re at the precinct?”

He shook his head, biting down on his bottom lip. Fuck it really shouldnt turn you on as much as it just did.

“What,” you chuckled, “haven’t got any clients in detention right now?”

“Uh-uh,” he smiled again, “I just came to talk to you quickly and then I have a meeting in the building next door.”

Your heart rate increased rapidly at his words; and that smile. God that fucking smile. It was too nice to look at, his lips making yours turn up in unison, eyes glued to the floor as it was much too intimidating to maintain eye contact with him at this moment. The tension felt thick, and the room suddenly felt like everyone else had disappeared, the two of you only existing in this space. A small giggle erupted from your lips, yet another reminder of what happened that last time only the two of you shared a space. The space solely between the two of you felt like it was getting smaller itself. 

“Ah-ahem.”

The sweet little moment was interrupted by the burning craters that were 2 pairs of eyeballs burning the left side of your face. You turned to them, a smile wiped off your face the moment you saw their grins. You tucked your hair behind your eyes, snapping back into reality mode. An immediate spark of anger rushed through your body, for two different reasons. One was that everything you told yourself in the morning, to deny and suppress. Secondly, the fact that you had been caught out, and humiliated in front of the two people that you interacted with the most during work hours. Now it would be even harder to deny.

“Ok so I’ll talk to you later?”

“What time?”

“I should be done patrol at like 3.”

“Okay well I’m busy after 3 so can I just talk to you now?”

“No,” you snapped, frustration increasing from Changbin not listening to you, “I just said that I can’t.”

“It’s going to take 10 minutes. Surely you can spare that?”

“Why? Because my work is not as important as yours?”

“No,” he scoffed, scratching his face out of his own frustration, “because I need to tell you before the end of the day.”

“Okay well I don’t know what you want me to tell you.”

The sound of the precinct was softening, the sounds of other conversations coming to a halt, the only one that could be heard was the two of you with your in character bickering. People were starting to look, but you would not let Changbin get the last word out of you; this was always the case. He said nothing, jaw clenching at your non-compliance.

“Can’t you just tell me now, at this desk?”

“No,” he mumbled, “it’s kind of private.”

“Just say it now I’m sure it’s not that bad.”

“What part of it’s private do you not understand?”

“Changbin if it’s about the case you can say it, everyone knows who he is.”

The pompous lawyer panicked, trying to say anything to keep your attention that he was so desperate for.

“So you,” he sighed, hesitating before he spoke again, “ so you want me to tell everyone that he said you’re a bad cop and he knew from the day he became your T.O?”

The look on your face was unexplainable.You were speechless. An immediate pang, which felt like a gunshot, shot straight to your heart. It should have made you more angry. Fuming that he would say something like that. But really, it just made you sad. It was genuinely hurtful, even though he was a criminal, to hear someone that you were so close to and looked up to speak ill of you. The hundreds of times he had said to your face how proud they were. It was all a lie.Suddenly the air felt thick, making it hard for you to catch your breath, gasp, breathe for air, the walls were closing in, and there was nowhere to escape. 

He, Changbin, could read it on your face. He couldn’t quite put a finger on what it was, but he knew that something wasn’t right. It was an emotion he had never seen on your face before. You were speechless, he was also speechless. The guilt hit him like a truck, twisting in his gut like the actions of a murderer with a knife. He stepped forward, a hand coming to your shoulder, but it was too late, your back was turned, and the closest free interrogation room felt like the right place to be as you locked the door behind you. A tear threatened to spill from your duct, finger immediately wiping any possible remnant of clear liquid before it could make a mark as you sat in the chair nearby as thought after thought after thought ruminated in your stress riddled mind. 

It wasn’t a surprise to hear a knock on the door. It was a surprise, however, that when your eyes peeked through the small glass window that covered the center of the door, it was the pompous lawyer that had come to your rescue. You quickly ducked down, praying that he didn’t see you. 

You shouldn’t be mad at him, but he really was the last person you wanted to see at that moment. It was too late though, the click of the door easily audible and now it was him, in the same room, looking at you, huddled up on the floor. The list of things to be embarrassed about was becoming easier to identify.

“Hey,” he mumbled, the volume of his voice lowering, practically non-existent at the last letter of the greeting. You quickly stood, humiliated that it was not the first time this day he had found you like this. You said nothing, a quick sniffle escaping your nose as you stood to face him.

“Look, Y/n, I-”

“Did he really say that?”

Changbin let out a heavy sigh as he averted your gaze, “I don’t think he meant it.”

Your eyebrows furrowed, genuine confusion expressed over your facial features. You began to pace back and forth, index finger in your mouth as your brain began to rewire itself. Trying to think of every single moment you shared with your T.O. Were there times on the job that he was doing dirty things behind your back? How did he do it? There was no doubt in your mind he was guilty, but the situation never failed to play games with your mind. It was a vicious cycle. Wanting to help him, but remembering he did everything you stood against, questioning why, how, trying to convince yourself he was a good person, and repeat. It was in fact where your mind was right now, and he could see it. It was written all over your face. Although you were ‘special’ as he said, you were not the first person to testify for a client of his that had a reaction like this. 

“Why would he say that though? It makes no sense.”

You continued to pace, making him worried very much so. Although he hated your guts, seeing you in this kind of anxiety, it made him feel for you. He stepped forward, attempting to prevent you from pacing back and forth, but it was no use. You were much too deep in thought.

“Y/n.” 

Nothing

“Y/n.”

His tone increased in volume the more you ignored him.

“Y/n,” he sighed again, “y/n?”

Fuck he did not enjoy being the lack of being acknowledged in the slightest. The blight on his ego was simply too big. 

“That’s it.”

He huffed, pacing over and perfectly timing his attack so that he could nip at your wrists, pushing your body weight backwards and against the door, hands above your head, just like last night. The look in the pompous lawyer's eyes, however, was slightly different. Not close to being as gentle or placid at the last time your proximity was so close. It took your mind out of that toxic loop instantly, the only noise you could make was a gasp. Maybe you blanked. Maybe you just completely dissociated, because you really had no idea how you ended up here, again, pinned against a hard surface, Changbin the one pinning you down. Brows still furrowed, a frustration was rising on your chest. No matter how hard you pushed, he would not budge. He was simply too strong for you. The thought made your heart race. Your chest was heaving up and down, breathing heavily as your body tried to make up for the pacing that was most definitely a workout for some, and you as well apparently.

“What are you doing?”

You tried again, a soft groan of pain escaping your lips as your elbow hit the wooden door. 

“Stop trying to escape, and listen.”

“Why should I listen to you?”’

It was now the pompous lawyer’s turn for his facial expressions to change. He was biting down on his bottom lip, jaw clenched as he just waited, simply waiting for you to, for once, not be as stubborn as usual.

“Because I’m trying to help you.”

“How are you helping me,” your tone was angry, the tremble in your voice was small, but it was definitely there, “ever since you’ve made me a part of the case, you’ve done nothing but hurt me. You’re doing it right now.”

His immediate reaction was to let go. The thought, to him, of genuinely hurting you in any way killed him on the inside. Before, it was a minute detail in his day; well, that was how it started for him. Day by day, it became the thing he looked forward to. Sure, his clients were important, but the moment Changbin saw your look of distaste from the moment your eyes met, there was a satisfaction. A gratification. If he went to the precinct and you weren’t there, he got stuck on it. He would never admit this, but arguing with you tends to be the highlight of his day. 

Hearing you say such words now; the impact was different this time.

“I’m sorry, I,” he hesitated, knowing you were in a vulnerable state, “I didn’t mean to.”

His voice was quiet, but it didn’t matter to you. The anger that was bubbling at the peak of your chest was making you too blind to see his genuine regret he had in the moment.

“You’re not helping me. You just embarrassed me in front of the precinct, again.”

“I didn’t mean to,” he hissed, starting to get annoyed by your antics, “I wanted to tell you in private, but you insisted on me telling you in the moment.”

The eye roll from you was immense.

“You have got to be fucking kidding me.”

“What,” you asked, unsure why he was reacting the way he did.

“Don’t fucking roll your eyes at me, I’m trying to fucking help you.”

“How have you helped me, huh?”

You took a step closer to him, then another, the pompous lawyer refusing to back down from your attempted intimidation. The two of you knew better than to participate in a subtle, yet strenuous tension in the form of a face off. Before it never led to anything, but with the events of yesterday already adding another layer of tension to the complication of your relationship, things were about to take another turn. Maybe it’s what you wanted. Maybe he too also wanted that. But you could list a bunch of other unsatisfactory tasks you would rather do than admit it. The space between the two of you was closing in an immediate time frame, the silent tension of the room deafened slightly by the footsteps that were your boots. Changbin’s heel on his obnoxiously luxurious dress shoes clicked backwards with each step he took. It was now his turn to be backed into a corner, wide shoulder hitting the back wall, opposite to the door. If anything happened now, anyone would be able to see through the window of the door. 

Your care for that was irrelevant as your back faced it, the thought not even coming into your mind.

“Why are you so silent now?”

“Because,” he gritted his teeth, “I did fucking help you.”

An exacerbated laugh fell from your lips, “You talk the talk, but you can never walk the walk Mr. Seo.”

It was his turn to smirk, his left hand dared to snake around your waist, fingertips traveling your midline, stepping at the edge of your neck. His thumb and index finger split ways, the pad of your digit giving your neck a gentle squeeze. Your eyelids fluttered involuntary, hating that your body craved him once the pompous lawyer's touch became existent. He could feel you, you were tense. Even the way your head slouched, shoulders decompressing, and then he squeezed again. God you should have fucking hated this. Swiped his hands away and punched him. How dare a man think he could just do that. 

But Changbin was only doing what you said. Proving that he could do the talk and the walk; all of a sudden the pompous lawyer was speaking a thousand words with two simple maneuvers of his finger tips. An unexplainable moan left your lips, the texture of his fingers feeling almost too perfect to gain your own skin.

“Ringing any bells now?”

You couldn't say nothing, the combination of your circulation being impacted and the secondary fact being that you would never admit when you were wrong. Although morally questionable, he did help you in his own way. Your lips began to tingle, unsure if it was from his grip on your throat, or the unexplainable feeling that could be equated to the dopamine high of the texture that was Changbin’s lips, but one thing was for sure. The longer he had you like that, the stronger the intensity to need him right here, right now became. 

When your eyelids fluttered open again, you couldn’t help but smile, now partly embarrassed of how easy it was for him to persuade you. Remind you of how good he could make you feel. The pompous lawyer, in his own way, was helping you get through this. 

“Fuck, I’m gonna regret this.”

You gave him no time to respond, walking backwards, dragging him by the hand around your neck as his backside landed on the edge of the table once more, your own legs atop of his as you now sit on his lap, lips lunging forward and connecting with him immediately. It was completely forgotten the environment you were in the moment the two of you connected. Everything felt so much clearer, like there was a pathway out of all of this. The pompous lawyer withdrew his hand from your throat, instead, snaking both to hold your ass in place. A deep groan escaped his lips as soon as he got his hands on your flesh. He was subtle with his touch here, a light rhythm of massage forming as the kiss deepend further and further, all of your senses focused on the texture, sound, smell of the pompous lawyer.

“Fuck,” you mumbled inbetween each kiss, “this is so unprofessional of me.”

He chuckled, the vibration easily felt against your lips as they left yours, covering the outer edge of your jaw, teeth gently biting down on your lobe, but that was it. It should be illegal how good his teeth felt fucking biting down on your like that. The pompous lawyer smirked, able to elicit the exact response he wanted.. He knew that you definitely were remembering how he was helping you.

“You never answered me,” he growled, voice laced with deep lust, the wanton need for you was eating him alive.

“You didn't ask a ques-”

“They’re fucking crazy.”

The voice through the speaker of the interrogation room took you out of the lust filled dimension that had engulfed you and brought you back to reality. The pompous lawyer knew he had been caught in a compromising position. He was much too experienced to know what that sound meant. The interrogation rooms at the precinct had a one sided mirror, allowing detectives to watch perpetrators when being interviewed, as well as if they needed to communicate with personnel during. Not for officers to be snooping on personal matters.

“Hyunjin what the fuck? Turn the one-sided reflection off and show me what you're doing right now.”

He did what he was told, the glass showing the sheepish, mischievous duo that was Hyunjin and Felix. Had they been there the whole time? Fuck. This is quite literally the worst thing that has ever happened to you in your life. The world was flashing before your eyes, and you knew damn well that there was no possible way that you could ever live this down. They also looked just as shocked, assuming they thought they were too slick to be caught. Changbin stood up immediately, bringing his hands to either side of his suit jacket in an attempt to straighten himself up. He checked his phone, pretending that he had a missed call from ‘someone important.’

“Oh uh, I have to go, I missed a call from a client.”

“Oh yeah sure,” you nodded, “you should probably take that.”

He nodded, eyes glued to the ground because quite frankly, he'd rather get hit by a bus than even having a chance of making eye contact with the two male officers standing in front of them. He went to walk out, meeting the two officers he wished to avoid outside of the room with you, the two of them watching your every movement. He looked at you once more, giving you a smile without lips or teeth, kind of like when you pass a stranger in the street and want to be nice.

“I have room tonight if you want to uh, discuss more about what we have been talking about.”

“For the case right?”

“Yes,” he yelled, way too loud and a poor strive of trying to come off as cool, calm and collected, the opposite of how someone should be after they have been caught making out with their sworn enemy. He coughed, adjusting his tone, “Yes of course, I’ll text you the time.”

“Yeah great okay bye.”

The pompous lawyer sped walk into the opposite direction. A sigh of relief escaped your chest the moment he was out of everyone’s sight. It was now time for your two best friends to cop the biggest grilling of their life. But later, you were honestly way too annoyed that Changbin riled you up and they interrupted such a hot, arousing moment. It was killing you the way that they didn’t even look apologetic. If anything, they looked like they were about to burst at the seams with laughter. There definitely was an “I told you so” bubbling at the brim of their lips.

“I don’t want to hear a fucking peep out of either of you for the rest of the day.”

The walk from the room to the seat was painful, the snickers and giggles erupting behind you only adding to your frustration. Even the moment you sat back down at your desk, they were burning holes into the side of your face with their eyes. You could only take so much. But at the same time it was impacting you from getting your work done, and that was where you drew the line. 

“How much did you hear?”

The two of them looked at each other, then back at you, a guilty expression written on their faces.

“Do you really want to know?”

“Would I ask if I didn’t?”

“We kind of followed Changbin for about 30 seconds after he went to look for you so he wouldn’t see us.”

A heavy sigh escaped your chest at their unfortunate confession.

“Ok,” you huffed, turning to face them. You really wished you weren't going to ask this, but it was better, you thought, to get it out in the open now, rather than being the elephant in the room.

 “I will let you both ask one question each and after that we never speak of it again. Deal?”

They both nodded, thank fuck.

“Okay, who is going to go first?”

“Me me me please,” Felix whined, kicking his feet up and down like a literal child throwing a tantrum.

“Okay go ahead.”

He smirked before opening that big mouth of his again, “what did he mean when he said,” he paused, adjusting his voice to imitate the pompous lawyer, tucking his chin in and lowering his head, thinking that would help achieve the sound he wanted.

“I did fucking help you.”

Your head was buried in your hands immediately. There was just no way you could answer. It would be opening a can of worms. You knew there would be no way that the two of them would be able to limit themselves.

“With the case. T.O is apparently saying a lot of bad stuff about me.” 

Felix knew as soon as your eyes darted away from him that you were definitely not telling the truth.

“You’re lying.”

You gasped, “No I’m not! How dare you even accuse me of that?”

Hyunjin smirked, “Y/n I’m sorry I know you’re my T.O and im 100% going to be stepping over the line here. But do you really expect us to believe that was the first time you have made out with that man?”

Your jaw dropped in disbelief. What were you even supposed to say to that? It was embarrassing because he hit the nail bang on the head. It took you back to last night, in his office, his length, his body that you saw always straining against that insufferable fabric, his hands, his fingers. The images of his hands on your core flashed through your mind for a brief moment, making you feel a little dizzy.

Hyunjin raised his hands towards you as he spoke again, “It looked like he really knew what he was doing with you.”

“Okay fine! You got me okay! It’s not the first time.”

“So when was the first time?”

“Last night,” you mumbled, turning away from them completely so the chance of them seeing what you said was zero to none.

“What?”

“You heard me.”

“Uh no,” Felix replied sarcastically, “I actually didn’t.”

“It was last night. At his office.”

The two of them said nothing, instead, Hyunjin reached into his desk drawer, pulling out a 10 dollar note and a pack of mini m&ms from the vending machine. 

“I fucking told you!” Felix yelled, causing half the precinct to stare. The three of you shriveled into your desks, whispering now seeming like the appropriate way to continue the conversation.

“Okay,” Hynunjin’s tone in a whisper was harsh, “you have to tell us the sequence of events.” “No I don’t? That’s so personal.”

“Oh yes you do,” your best friend interjects, whirling around in his chair to get closer to the two of you in the desk triangle, closing you in with nowhere to escape.

“Fine. You know I went there with innocent intentions. To talk about the case and that’s it.”

They nodded, but you huffed, knowing that you were about to sound so predictable and ridiculous to them.

“But, fuck man, he just makes me so angry. Like he says stuff to just piss me off on purpose because I say one little thing. Fuck he’s such a fucking dick! Like everybody, whether you like me or not, knows that this is a fucking hard situation for me. I was already so nervous going into it because the questions would be difficult. He just knows how to push my buttons.”

You closed your eyes, recalling the dialogue from last night in its entirety. For some reason you were anxious telling them. It had nothing to do with them judging you. They were simply just not like that. Maybe it was the fact that as you retold, you could feel his warmth, the touch that you mentioned you craved so much one it reappeared, running through your body. A dull ache formed under the top layer of your skin. Someone that you angrily hooked up with once, now twice, shouldn't have had this much of an impact on you. The context was vulnerable, you were sensitive, and he was just being there for you in sincerity, well that’s what you would like to think. Once your eyes opened, you were expecting a look of concern, but you were surprised, Hyunjin and Felix looking at each other with a brow raised before looking at you. They said nothing.

“What?”

“If I’m being honest,” Felix continued to whisper, “it kind of sounds like you were wanting to push his buttons.”

The rookie's eyes widened, clicking his fingers and nodding in agreement, “That’s what I was thinking!”

“Literally how did you derive that?”

“Y/n you know I’m honest. I feel like, and I can't believe I say a nice thing about that guy, but he was just being professional, asking the questions he needed, until you started rushing him, making comments out of the side of your mouth about him loving money.”

Felix paused, taking a deep breath, “I want to ask you, and don’t get angry with me.”

“Anything.”

“Did you go there, hoping that something would happen?”

You should have been offended by his question. What the fuck was he implying. But then you took yourself back to yesterday afternoon, and that feeling was back. That feeling that you couldn’t put your finger on, but you liked it. God did you fucking like it. The mystery of the unknown was enticing. But your best friend didn’t need to know that. 

“No,” you gulped, “I was just nervous to talk about the case, seeing as I blocked the core of it out of my mind.”

“We still don’t know what happened after he said, and I quote ‘I want to make sure you’re okay and you don’t get caught in the crossfire.’”

Felix giggled at Hyunjins dramatic recall. Your hand came to your face in the form of a facepalm, knowing what you were going to say next was so cliche. 

“Fuck my life, I said, ‘so rather than criticizing me, help me. Help me get through this how you would if you were me’ and one thing leads to another and.”

“And what, you guys kissed?”

Your lips escaped into your mouth, nodding, really not wanting to elaborate.

“Bit more than that?”

“Oh my god you guys fucked that’s crazy.”

The punch into Felix’s shoulder was warranted. You winced at the vulgarity of his words. However, it felt like a giant weight lifted off of your shoulders. 

“You didn’t have to say it like that, but yeah, we did and now its lowkey fucking with me head.”

The shrill of the desk phone almost knocked the three out of your seats. After your semi-heart attack has passed, you check the tiny phone screen, an unknown number popping up on the screen. You answered, sternly, “Hello, you're speaking with Officer Y/l/n.”

“Y/n hey, it’s Changbin.”

Your eyes bulged out of your head when you heard his name. You really should not be that excited at the sound of his voice. 

“Oh hey Changbin, what’s up?”

The two boys next to you were quick to swivel past, their ears resting against each of yours, waiting to get every single detail from a simple phone call they could.

“I was so flustered earlier, you know, getting caught I uhm.”

He paused.

“Can you cut to the chase please? We are very busy at the station here.”

Hyunjin nudged you, mouthing ‘that’s rude’ when you turned to look at him. He was right, it came off a little hush. Maybe you were just nervous, having an absent mind as to the reasons why he was actually calling.

“Oh uh sorry,” he coughed in between his words, “I realize I didn’t actually have your number. To contact you about our next appointment, nothing else of course.”

“Oh yeah,” you chuckled nervously, “sure for the case. It’s (y/p/n).”

“Great,” you could hear his smile through the phone, “I have some stuff at my apartment that I can’t bring to the office due to confidentiality. Would you be okay meeting at my apartment instead?”

“Uh, yeah okay sure.”

“Great, I’ll text you my address and the time.”

“Okay bye.”

Without warning, the phone was hung up back on the station. A pang of excitement streaked through your body, but vanished quickly, seeing your two best friends smacking each other silly. The moment you cut them with your eyes, they stopped, pretending to go back to work. They should not be this excited, and this time you were going to ensure that it was business only. You go, contribute to your testimony and leave. It did not matter that the setting would be informal, a couch, kitchen, a bed. The thought was irrelevant. It should have stopped there. But that would be too simple. One thought led to the flood of your brain, waves of cognitions of 30 minutes ago, his finger pads on your neck, lips on your jaw, which only naturally led to the lines of your ass tingling, reminiscing on the cool texture of the brown marble that was the edge of his desk. You could feel the perspiration excreting across your forehead at this moment. You brought your hand to your forehead, feeling an intense warmth at the touch. You were not getting just any fever from the cold weather. This fever only had the ability to be caused by one person. Him. The pompous lawyer, and it was fucking terrifying. It wasn’t even him as a person. Really you could care less about him personally.

The ding of your phone took you out of your thought monsoon, taking it out of your pocket immediately to see you had received a message from a number that had not been saved yet.

[12:42 pm]

*unknown* : Here is my address. I finish work at 7pm tonight. Does 7:30 work for you?

A sudden flow of panic swept through your body. Why did you feel so wrong, so guilty? It felt like a blight on your job, like it was going against everything you stood for. You also tended to have a flair for the dramatic. All you could do was stare at your phone. Unsure if you should even reply. If you didn’t, then you could save yourself from accidentally making this mistake. But then again, the longer you dragged this out, the longer you would have to work with him. Maybe it was just better to get it out of the way. Your thumbs began to hover over the screen, tapping the appropriate letters in order to reply. 

[12:53 pm]

Y/n: I finish patrol at 7 so 7:30 should be fine :)

[12:55 pm]

Changbin: No worries. C u then.

“He texted you, didn’t he?”

“He did,” you replied to Felix, “I’m going to his tonight after work.”

Hyunjin smirked, “To his huh?”

“Shut up,” you whined, “I’m just going to talk about the case, nothing else.”

“That’s what you said last time.”

Yeah, sure you were.

**

The day went surprisingly quickly. Patrol was quiet, just a couple of parking tickets. No chases thank goodness. The clock striked seven, and you were quick to clock out, giving you as much time as possible to get home, shower, fix your hair, chuck on some makeup, get a house warming gift and still be punctual.

You decided to go pretty low maintenance. Just a quick brush of your hair, subtle makeup, simple clothes being a pair of black flare leggings and a basic tee. It was already 7:15 by the time you were ready, and checking the maps, it was going to take another 10 minutes to get there. There was no choice for you but to leave now. Looking up at the mirror just before the front door, you had one last glance, noticing everything was in place before grabbing your car keys and speed walking to your car.

The drive was nerve wracking, eyes focused on the road while also trying to listen to the maps was fucking difficult. The time you estimated was correct, arriving 5 minutes early before getting out of the car. You locked the car with the button on your keys, placing them into your bag before taking in what was the pompous lawyers house. A basic white picket fence, however, his house was nothing short of grand. An iron carved black gate in front of the front door, well groomed hedges and flowers, tulips, roses, hydrangea, you name it. It was there. The statue of a large black fox, so sleek, tapered water out of its mouth running at the same time as the sprinklers covering the grass that made up the rest of the front lawn. Once you heard the doorbell similar to a grand opera, you knew this was a mistake. Changbin had to have been lying. The only reason he invited you to his house was once again just a flex. A brag to show how much money he made defending the scum of the earth. 

The front door opened, a much different person that was definitely not Changbin opening the door. You panicked for a brief moment, thinking that the pompous lawyer would do something as selfish as giving you the wrong address.

“Hello and welcome to the Seo manner. How can I help you?”

“Is this the right address? I’m here to see Changbin,” you shook your head, “Mr. Seo. I have an appointment.”

“Ah, you must be y/n. I am Seungmin, Changbin’s personal assistant.” 

Seungmin opened the iron clad door for you, allowing you to walk inside and once again, take in the inside of his house. The first thing you noticed was the staircase. It was in a circular motion, rounding all the way until it reached the second floor, appearing to be only one room there. The first floor had marble floors, similar to the desk of his office, very much open spaces. Interesting artwork however, seeming to be sketches of very much naked women around the house. Ugh. 

The pompous lawyer's personal assistant, who you did not know ever existed by the way, reached a hand out, inviting you to shake it. You accepted. Sheepishly, still taken aback by how annoyingly nice his house was. 

“Changbin is just in his home office. I’ll take you there now.”

You simply nodded, walking behind the new stranger.

“So how long have you been Changbin- Mr.Seo’s assistant for?”

“For a few years.”

“But we have never met before?”

“Yes well,” he chuckled, “I don’t really take part in his business life. More home and personal events.”

“Ah I understand,” you smiled. The walk was short. Two large wooden doors obstruct you from seeing his office.

“You know Mr. Seo talks about you alot?”

There it was again. He was now the second person to say that. It doesn’t matter, it’s not like it meant anything. You weren’t sure what to say, interrupted by the grand opening, seeing a much more relaxed Changbin. His hair was down, a much stronger wave to it. He was not wearing a suit either. The pompous lawyer was wearing a pair of black sweats, a white t-shirt that was of course way too small for his figure, and a navy jacket, accompanied by a collar. The thing that took you off guard the most was the glasses. This was also a new fact that you had learnt about this subject. That he needed glasses. They were cute the way they sat on his face, much too big for the shape of his features. You could feel the heat creep onto your cheeks as soon as his eyes landed on you. His smile was warm for the briefest second you could count, returning right back to stoic expression before getting out of his chair, walking up to greet you.

“Y/n,” he smirked, a quick glance up and down before his hand came out for a shake, “good evening.”

Your brow furrowed, constantly confused by Changbin’s demeanor. It was constantly changing, and you really did not know what to expect. The toxic part of you longed for it when it was simple, which was only a day ago. Nothing but arguing and bickering. Instead, it was this half witted, sarcastic charm, showing off his ‘professionalism’ in front of his assistant. If only he knew what happened at the office. You took his hand, giving him an unsure shake before pulling away, following the gesture of his other hand towards the small couch in the corner of his far from humble office. He took the edge on the opposite side of you, adjusting himself before he gazed at you again.

“How was the rest of your day?”

“Fine,” you nodded politely, “how was yours?”

“Uh great.”

There was some awkwardness, yet simultaneously, there was a tension that lingered. The two of you would be stupid to be ignorant of it. Too many things had happened in the past 48 hours to act like everything was fine. Maybe for him it was. Part of the pompous layers job was to act nonchalant, mysterious if you will. He could never show his emotions in court, especially when he was losing. He knew how to keep things cool, calm and collected.

But everything changed when it came to you. Even before yesterday, no matter what you did, it always got a rise out of him, and he could not help but lash out. There was no self control when it came to you. But similar to yourself, he would rather stay in denial than admit that care about what you think of him. Your opinion of him.

Your chest felt like it was going to burst. The guilt traveled over your body. He was trying to be nice, accommodating. He didn’t half come to find you after you begged him to tell you the hurtful stuff you T.O said. An apology was sitting at the tip of your tongue, but you were not sure how to say it.

“Did you want to get start-”

“I’m really sorry.”

“Oh,” he chucked, “what are you sorry for?”

You scooched closer, wanting to be genuine in your sincerity, “For today at the precinct. That was really unprofessional of me and I will make sure that my two fellow officers apologize the next time they see you.”

The pompous lawyer said nothing, instead, throwing his head back, just laughing at your apology. How fucking dare he? Give someone an inch, and they'll take a mile. It already annoyed you in general when someone laughed at your sincerity, but the fact that it was him; the level of anger was a whole new one. 

“Why are you laughing?”

“Oh,” you attempted to contain yourself, placing a hand on his chest, “why are you apologizing? I started it.”

“Oh.”

Your body suddenly relaxed, realizing that he was laughing with you, rather than at you. His laugh was somewhat infectious, causing you to follow suit.

“If anything I should be apologizing, I started it.”

“Oh well, are you going to?”

His laughing ceased quickly.

“No, I can't apologize for something I’m not sorry for.”

“Oh my god,” you huffed, immediately fanning your face to disrupt the heat that was coming to it. The smile on your face was impossible to wipe off. He noticed it too, but instead of embarrassing you, he got up, grabbing a folder of what you assumed to be classified documents off his desk and onto the table in front of you. 

“Okay so, we need to really get into the nooks and crannies of your daily routines with your T.O.”

The mention of your former supervisor killed the lighthearted mood of the room. Even though you knew that was the purpose of this meeting, it still was a sensitive topic. You nodded, gulping intensely in preparation for what he would ask you. 

“Right,” you sighed, gritting your teeth to stay on guard, “that’s what we are here for.”

“Yessss,” he hissed, extending his words, “well since this was an inside police operation, what would you do when he would communicate with witnesses that were part of the syndicate?”

“Uhh,” you puff your cheeks, eyes looking at the ground as you recall your memory, “I usually would wait outside because they would get me to coordinate and communicate with the backup officers.”

Changbin clenched his jaw as he concentrated on his notepad, legs spread wide as he focused the thin paper on one knee, forearm clenching back and forth to write down every intricate detail of what you said. 

“Okay, and so then what if it was a minor crime?”

“I’m not sure what you mean?”

“When the crime was not large enough, and there was no backup required. What did he do then?”

“Oh I see,” you gasped, understanding the question, “usually I would just stand behind. If it was a home visit, he usually got me to look around while he asked the questions.”

So you were not present during questioning ever?”

“Not really, unless it was like pulling a car over. I usually did that.”

“Right, okay.”

As he wrote down what you said, your brain, unforgivingly, started to tick. It felt odd that your T.O wanted you as a character witness, yet they kept saying bad things about you to Changbin. 

“Changbin, can I ask you a question?”

“Sure.”

The pompous lawyer is unable to look up, still concentrating on finishing what you said on the notepad.

“Why would they want me as a character witness? Why do they keep saying bad things about me to you?”

His pen froze immediately.

“Uh,” he scrunched his nose, scratching his head in a feigning innocence, “I’m not sure. You do bring up a good point. Did you want a coffee? I also have tea.”

That was strange, but you chose to brush it off, blaming it on your nerves about the case being the reason for your perception. Changbin got up immediately, not even waiting for you to answer. You grabbed the bottle out next to your bag, making sure he could see what you were holding. He chuckled, “we actually have to do some work first.”

“Damn,” you sighed, smacking your knee playfully, “if only we didn’t need to do any work.”

“Yeah,” he replied, biting down on his bottom lip, “if only there were other things we could do.”

The tension in the room had come back, the intensity stronger than before. You knew he could be a douchebag, but not in a way that would turn you on a little bit. The pompous lawyer had never been so forward, putting it out on the table. It made you giggle, feeling like an innocent woman who had been corrupted by the devil that was the main in front of you. 

Your giggle was cut short, however, hearing your ringtone permeating through the room. Unzipping your bag next to you, you grabbed your phone, confused as to when you saw an unknown number. You still answered, as you normally did.

“Officer y/n, who is calling?”

“Y/n.”

Your heart sank immediately,knowing exactly whose voice was on the other side.

“Why are you calling me?”

“Hey y/n, how are you though?”

“How am I?,” you paused, taking your phone off your ear and putting it on speaker, “what the fuck do you think?”

“Y/n,” they sighed, “I know I fucked up, I’m sorry I-”

“Why did you try to throw me under the bus to Changbin?”

As soon as you answered the call, the pompous lawyer turned his back to you. He did not want any part of this. That was until he heard your last question. His actions were immediate, jumping to your side as he anticipated his client’s response. He was desperate to hear what your T.O was saying, but it was impossible, seeing as your phone was glued to your ear.

“What? I never said anything bad about you to him. You were my most respected rookie.”

“How am I supposed to believe anything you say?”

“Look, y/n, I know I have fucked up bad, but I truly never said that. Changbin told me to call you.”

“What?”

The look on your face was contorted, truly confused about what to believe. The pompous lawyer's eyes widened, hands hovering over yours as he attempted to take your phone, thumb reaching for the red button, attempting to hang up. He should have known better than to try and take something off of a police officer. Your hands were nimble, however, it was your foot that came in clutch, sweeping at his ankle before he fell to the floor, pinning him down, hovering over his body, keeping your phone on the floor above his head. 

“He told me to call you, ask you to help me in the case, by my character witness.”

“Oh,” you gritted, practically death glaring at the man underneath you, “did he?”

He tried to become free of your hold, but there was simply no chance. The anger that was beginning to bubble at Changbin’s deception was pooling into your hands, finger pads slowly digging into the bulge that was his forearm muscles.

“Yeah I-”

“Look, I gotta go. If you need something from me, you can contact me through your lawyer. Bye.”

You were quick to hang up the phone, simultaneously deciding to surrender your domineering position on top of him. Your chest was bubbling with vexation, hurt. Why would he do all of this? To embarrass you. To get back at what happened last night? How do you even address that?

The pompous lawyer said nothing, standing up and straightening his shirt before taking a seat in his home office chair. He opened his laptop, completing forgetting that you were there, to see him, for an appointment, to talk about this fucking case that he completely manipulated you into being a part of. You walked over to his desk, standing over him as you stared him down, refusing to give your stance. You waved your hands, knowing damn well that he would be able to see it in his peripheral view. He did nothing, instead, opening his emails and pretending to scan the screen, refreshing multiple times and most likely praying that he could get out of admitting to his fault by replying to a new message. 

“You have got to be fucking kidding me right now?”

Nothing.

“Changbin? Are you serious right now?”

Nothing.

“What happened to helping like you said?”

He said nothing for a third time, but in your book, three strikes, you're out. Grabbing the papers that laid on his desk, you picked them up, thawing them on the floor. It took the physical motion of the papers dropping to the inferior surface is how you got something out of him. He turned to face you, still in his chair, jaw dropped to the floor.

“What do you think you’re doing?”

Your head falls back in a laugh, amazed at the audacity of his question.

“Did I get your fucking attention? Do these papers being messed up disadvantage you in any way? Will this mess up your pretty little house?”

You pouted, as fake in sincerity as they come. 

“Do you think that’s an appropriate way to behave?”

“God,” you sighed, “I knew this was a mistake coming here.”

Rather than arguing, it was easier for you to say nothing, grabbing your bag and heading for the door. Changbin watched you walk, but he didn't want you to leave. Of course he felt bad, but it was Chagbin. The pompous lawyer didn’t have the name for no reason. He scurried to the door, pushing it against your pull to shut it. Changbin stood in front, hands blocking the hinges to prevent your exit in any way. 

“Let me explain.”

Your gaze remained anywhere but on him, refusing to give the pompous lawyer that satisfaction.

“Start talking.”

“They were telling the truth.”

Your heart sank, again. You walked back to the couch, taking a seat in order to listen to the bullshit this man in front of you was about to say. 

“I did tell them to call you, but that was before I even mentioned the case to you. It wasn’t until yesterday when I spoke to your Sargeant that I should not have mentioned that. Which is why I was going to bring it up organically with you.”

“Right,” you replied in a blunt tone, “Did Sergeant tell you to lie and keep details from me as well?”

The pompous lawyer looked away, not wanting to fess up. The lack of answer made you shake your head, a laugh of frustration leaving your lips. Your hands were in the air. 

“You know what? This is my fault,” you yelled, voice growing louder with each word, “I shouldn’t have expected anything more from you.”

“What?” 

His eyes were squinted, completely taken aback by your bold statement. His eyes were blazing holes into your face, desperate to hear how on earth you would back up what you just said. 

“You heard me. God I feel like a fucking idiot myself. Expecting more from you, to actually treat me with care and respect. But of course you lied, and acted like the pompous lawyer I knew you were to be. You brought me here to show me once again, how rich you are and that you think you’re better than everyone else.”  

Changbin laughed, a smirk appearing on his face at your words, his own anger bubbling at the base of his throat. Like you said, his ego, pride was a large construct. The tumultuous amounts of time the two of you had squabble at the precinct, in front of others, being told off by the Sergeant, it was endless. But everytime you insulted him, directly attacked his character, it was like a stab wound right to the middle of the chest. 

“I’m a pompous lawyer? You’re the most fucking uptight officer I have ever seen. Do every single thing by the fucking book.”

He took a step closer as he continued his speech.

“Everything. I took the fucking stick out of your ass last night and what? For you to turn around and say I’m not helping you? I’m a pompous lawyer, yet I took the time to bring you to my office. I followed you to the interrogation room today. And you’re angry?”

“Yes,” you bit back, viciously, “I’m fucking angry, you lied!”

The pompous lawyer chuckled, again, taking another stride closer to you. You hated so many things at that moment. The smug expression on his face, the way his chest was puffing heavily when he finished yelling back. But what you really hated the most, truly, was how turned on you were. Impressed that someone in your life actually had the balls to give back the same energy you gave him. His aura was angry, but it was not being translated that way. If anything, maybe because your senses were being blinded by your arousal, but the scent that permeated from the pompous lawyer was one that you could feel yourself getting pulled in, and you hated it. Really, really hated it. Trying to maintain your composure was getting difficult.

“You’re not angry,” he chuckled, again, “look at you.”

“Are you joking,” you laughed nervously, “you have no idea how angry I am right now.”

“Show me,” Changbin huffed, closing the distance between the two of you to, at this night, at all time close proximity. You could feel the perspiration on your skin linger, causing the palm of your hands to clam up. What was his idea? What were you expecting? 

“What?”

The pompous lawyer’s tone decreased in sound the closer he got to you. His eyes however, did not move, pupils like superglue stuck to your own, every now and then hovering to your lips.

“I love when you're angry at me.”

“Why the fuck would you like that?” 

“Because,” he paused, gently slipping his arms out of his jacket, before he continued, “it makes me want to fuck the anger out of you.”

A gasp escaped from your lips, completely taken aback by the vulgarity of his language, again. Out of all the things he could have possibly said, that was the last thing you expected. But deep down, you knew there was much truth to his words, and therefore, maybe that was the reason why the two of you fought so much. You would be lying if you said that you hadn't thought about it. Maybe it was because of your love life, after being in a relationship for a long time, followed by a long period of being by yourself. You were content, happy with spending time with yourself, family friends. But there were moments where you needed some passion. Sure, police patrol at times was crazy work, but it didn’t feel personal. Sometimes it crept into your mind how nice it would be to have a man rip your clothes off, treat you harshly and not apologize for it.

Your pursed lips turned into a smirk as you took a step closer, wrapping your arms around his neck. You were stubborn, so was he. Making the first move, with your lips, was not a viable option. Changbin still looked mad, his face never changing as his own arms wrapped around your lower back. 

“Yeah?” you questioned, biting down your bottom lip, “I’m really fucking angry.”

This was not right. You forgot that the pompous lawyer had just lied to your face. But the feeling of his fingertips digging into your backside, palms crawling underneath the fabric that obstructed him from getting a feel of your skin, the real you, fingernails accidentally dragging across the faceless hairs on your back, the texture changing as a shiver shot down your spine, straight through the center of your back. A large gasp gritted through your teeth, the sound resembling one of giving up and into his touch. 

Changbin got closer, lips barely an inch away, his bottom lip accidentally touching your chin as he brought them to yours, dragging it out as long as possible before the gentlest kiss known to man. A small peck was all it took before hebecause after that, things reached a boiling point within a matter of seconds. 

Hands were flying around each other's bodies, tongues racing for dominance as the pompous’ lawyers strength walked you backwards, legs giving way as the back of your knees hit the edge of the sofa, falling backwards, lying across said sofa. Changbin chuckled as the two of you got pulled away from gravity, but he was quick to follow. The pompous lawyer’s reached out his hand to life you off of the couch, swapping positions so that he was now sitting on the sofa, spreading his legs wide as he used his left hand to point at you, middle and index finger suggesting you to sit a top of him, right hand undoing the buckle on his belt. Your jaw dropped at how simple he could multitask, and boy was it enough for you to accept the invitation. Each leg sitting on the opposite side of his, core begging to ache as the dense fabric of your bottoms gently brushed against his groin. The feeling that you have been chasing, the one you felt last night was coming back. 

“Mmm,” he mumbled, wrapping his digits around the back of your neck as he pulled you in again, hips setting a gentle pace as your lips and hips moved back and forth. It took everything in you to not let out the most gut wrenching moan. The two of you were doing the bare minimum, and admitting to Changbin, the pompous lawyer, that you were getting great satisfaction out of such a simple action was just something you refused to do. Instead he did it for you, the bellow of his groan sending a vibration into your lips, past your throat, and into the pit of your stomach. Your hands began to snake around, left hand snaking up and underneath his t-shirt, the other attempting to wip the belt out of its holding. The man below you pulled away for a brief moment, shadowing the dorsal side of your hands as he whipped his own belt out of each hole, pulling and pushing it away as the two of you reconnected. The pompous lawyer kicked the pool that was his pants off his ankles, your right hand continuing its mission,right to his throbbing length. The pompous lawyer accidentally bit down on your bottom lip, pulling away again to let out a deep moan as he felt the callousness of your feelers wrapping around him. A sigh of relief, followed by a lustful smile played on your lips as you kept your hand in the same spot, watching the pompous lawyer drag his hips in desperation. God, Changbin was already on cloud 9. You having his hand on his cock was all he truly could think about since last night. Even the brief moment, the fact that last night, he spent most of his time trying to pleasure you, the few moments you spent pleasuring him were all he could think about. He knew it was selfish, because watching you contort and give into him, even after all of the meanings she he has said about you in the past should have been good enough to imprint in his brain; and by all means, they were. But as soon as your hands were on him again, quite literally, his memories were only replaying that. Although you sitting on his lap was blocking his full ability for you to feel all of him, he did not care. Any touch that was yours was good enough for him.

You scooted back, allowing Changbin to lift his hips and swipe his pants off in one swift motion, dropping the fabric to his ankles. His expose now gave you free rain, pulling away as you tried to catch your breath as both of your hands wrapped around the base of his pulsating cock, the pompous lawyer's hips bucking involuntarily, lips shaking as his throat let out a deep groan at the contact. “Jesus,” he hissed.

“What,” you pouted, attempting to mock him in his vulnerable state, “can’t handle it?”

“You’re so annoying when your smug,” he groaned, fingers trickling across the hem of your shirt, arms leaving him for a brief moment as he lifted your obstructing garment over your chest, eyes almost watering as soon as it was off, two fingers hanging around your back and there it was, bra clipped off instantly. Your automatic reaction was to cover up, how ironic. It wasn’t something that he had not seen before, but this felt a little different. The longer he kept his eyes on your chest, the moreheated your cheeks became. His eyes softened, almost like he was watching you in awe. It made you freeze, part of you feeling rude if you moved. His hand came to your wrists, gently pulling on the flesh to prevent you from hiding, and as soon as he did, the man became a fiend. 

Chanbgin’s lips attacked the soft flesh immediately, fingertips quick to assist as they gripped the mound, tongue flicking across your left nipple. Your head was throwing back, your own hands running through the pompous lawyer’s usually slicked back hair. His teeth came into the mix, the roughness of his mouth truly felt like heaven. It was in some kind of way a metaphor of your relationship. Rough around the edges. The roughness being the constant bickering, the continuous back and forth, but nonetheless, it still felt good. So good. The pompous lawyer was unforgiving with his mouth, tongue leaving your nippes, still stuck out however, leaving a trail down your stomach. The cool sensation of his saliva felt like ice to your heated skin, back arching the closer he got to where you needed him the most. Your eyes opened as soon as his digits reached the waistband of your pants. Luckily the bottoms you chose to wear did not have any buttons or a zipper, because Changbin was able to swing them off of your hips, desperalty kicking your legs to take them off, along with your panties simultaneously. Desperate time calls for desperate measures. If anything, it added to the fun of it all. Made it feel like it was something you weren’t supposed to be doing. The whole point of this was to come here and work on the case. The testimony was only a week away and to be prepared was the most important thing. 

But as soon as you were in close proximity to Changbin, which usually boiled your bones, your brain conspired, a lust filling fluid encompassing the matter. It was going to become a real problem, because your cognitions began to change and associate with the lewd acts you did every time you saw him. 

But that seemed like a minute detail in the current moment as the pompous lawyer gripped himself, a few pumps as a small uncontrollable moan left his lips over and over. You lifted your hips off his lap, wanting to help him as he lined his cock up with your pulsating entrance. My god, were you throbbing. This had been the longest time that anyone had not touched you prior to penetration. Usually you needed it, the men you had been with before never did enough to prepare you in that way. But your pussy was quivering with anticipation, dripping with arousal for him. Changbin used his free hand, index finger briefly swiping through your folds, your hips jolting immediately at the unexpected friction. The movement was quick, bringing his digits to his lips and smearing your arousal across the pink flesh, tips entering the hole that was his mouth. Your eyebrows furrowed as your lips fell open, ocre throbbing even harder at how attractive the pompous lawyer looked, underneath you, tasting your slick. Fuck, if you knew this is what would happen everytime the tow of you disagreed, this would have occurred alot sooner. Every second that he wasn't inside of you, it was a second of more torture. 

“Hurry up,” you mumbled, giggling as your hips were fatigued, resting and letting your core land across his cock. Your clit barely brushed his tip, another nervous chuckle escaping your lips at the bare second of pleasure that flooded your veins at every little friction, every little touch. His smirk disappeared, tongue hanging outside of his mouth, eyebrows chiseled in a form that helped him to concentrate. But boy were you making it hard for him. You were such a distraction. There was a tumultuous amount of ways he wanted to pleasure you that were ticking on his brain, much more intensely before. Now, his brain was fried, your body combined with your horny daze was enough to drive him crazy. 

Changbin’s tip was prodding at your entrance, and enough was enough. You lifted your hips again, this time ready as his cock plunged into your entrance, a universal moan of relief from the two of you as he allowed his length to chrome buried in the depth of your pussy. Changbin brought you close, wrapping his around your back immediately, face hidden in your tits. You thought, once you were well adjusted to his girth, that you should move. And so you did, ankles lying on either side of his thighs as your knees chipped away at the sofa, hips slowly beginning to rise, and fall. Rise and fall. Over and over again. 

“Jesus fucking christ,” you spat, hips riding back and forth, the pompous lawyer’s cock hitting all the right spots inside. Changbin’s tongue found its way back to your nipples, the extra sensation leaving you unable to stay quiet. Every thrust was a new level of pleasure. Your digits came to the man below you’s face, leaning down to engulf him in a deep kiss, wanting Changbin to feel the moans in his throat. The pompous lawyer reciprocated, the combinations of noises spilling out of your mouth in unison creating a heavenly vibration across your lips. He chuckled as he broke away, head falling back against the back of the sofa as his hands were simply too desperate to not roam, finger tips gravitating towards the mound that was your ass. He smacked each cheek a few times, following by grabbing in an attempt to smooth over.

“Can’t believe that fat ass is bouncing on my cock again,” he grunted, smiling as he bit down on his bottom lip, “so desperate for me.”

“Don’t get ahead of yourself,” you whimpered, increasing the pace of your rhythm, “always cocky you are.”

“Yeah, and you fucking love it,” he chuckled, “this pussy belongs to me you know?”

Changin’s words made you moan, his possessiveness something that you didn’t know why, but really turned you on. His words always had an effect on you, no matter what. Positive or negative, the pompous lawyer’s words always had an impact that would be deemed much more significant than the average person should be by their mortal enemy. Then again, most people wouldn’t have sex with their mortal enemy, more than once. Changbin’s hands, the selfish things, began to roam again, slightly huffed at your lack of acknowledgement to his question. They somehow landed right where you wanted them, where they were earlier in the day, at the precinct. 

“Ohhh,” you moaned, wrapping your hands at the bat of his right wrist as they were at your neck, Changbin’s digits fondly wrapping around the fragile skin, the most subtle of pressure being applied. Your face was in a dazed awe, unable to concentrate on your hips moving in a syncopated style. Instead, he removed his hands off of you for a brief moment, standing on his knees on the sofa as he waited for you to do the same in front of him. Bending over, Changbin was quick to make work, using both of his hands to spread your ass, leaning forward and pressing a gentle kiss to your pussy, followed by a stingy few kitten licks, the friction making your knees buckle. You brought your hand to your throat, trying to recreate the exact feeling that you needed from him. But it wasn’t the same. It was after he pushed his oscillating cock back into your hole, did he notice your hand there. The pompous lawyer chuckled, in awe at how desperate you were for his touch. The two of you stood, bodies pressed against each other so Changbin could reach your throat. He did it with ease, mouth resting against your right shoulder as he bit down gently, the rough friction gratifying by every means. 

“So so good,” you mumbled, unable to form a coherent sentence, “don’t stop.”

“Such a fucking dirty girl,” he grunted, pulsating in his pressure against your throat, “imagine if anyone at the precinct saw you like this.”

You could only moan in response. His pace was cold, harsh, unforgiving. It made your whole body jolt in unison. He was right. The side you gave him privy to here in your personal time was something that not one of your work colleagues expected. Yes, you told Hyunjin and Felix information from time to time, but you were known as a stickler for the rules. A good cop that would never dare to do anything against the law. If police officers competed for employee of the month, you would be the employees that would have their face printed consecutively. Sometimes, it was hard for you to even believe that you were capable of showing, no. Letting someone see you in such a vulnerable, lust hazed state of consciousness. 

“You belong to me, don't you?”

“Mhm,” was all you could manage to say.

“Say it, say your pussy belongs to me.”

“My pussy,” you paused, feeling yourself coming to an all time high, “b-belongs to you.”

“Fuck,” he grunted, using his free hand to smack your ass once more, “you’re so hot when you’re obedient.”

He continued to fuck you, the pompous lawyer becoming more desperate with each thrust. The noise of Changbin’s skin slapping so loud it was sure to be echoing through the house, something Seungmin would definitely hear. His hips were beginning to lose their synchronicity, thrusts becoming slower yet harder. You weren’t sure how much more you could take. The pit in your lower abdomen was getting together and tighter, the sensation that was Changbin reaching an all time high at any moment. 

“Mmmmm Changbin,” you whined, unable to control the pitch of your voice, “Changbin fuck.”

“You ok baby?”

“I’m. I’m so close.”

“It's okay princess,” he cooed, the new nickname taking you by surprise, “me too. You need to cum?”

“Yes please.”

“Yeah you wanna cum for me?”

“Yes Changbin,” you cried, “it’s too much.”

“That okay baby,” Changbin whispered, “cum for me baby.”

His words smacked you into an orgasm, the sensation of the high rolling over every single nerve in your body at an intensity never felt by you before. You could feel the way your walls clenched around him uncontrollably, Changbin chuckling at how it felt around his cock. 

“Such a good girl,” he hummed, deeply, decreasing the power of his thrusts, “that pussy feels so good tweaking against me like that.”

The pompous lawyer did not last much longer after, quickly pulling out as he came on your back, hips jerking as he jerked himself to full completion. Your eyelids were dazed over, unable to calculate the time it took for Changbin to leave the room, grab a warm cloth, and clean your backside. He helped you off of your knees, grabbing a blanket that was under his desk before laying underneath you. He thought it would be a decent thing to do, cover you up as if he didn’t just see you completely naked. The two of you sat there for a while, a comfortable silence falling over the room as you stared at the ceiling wall.

“This is crazy, you know?”

You turned to look at the pompous lawyer, met with his perfect side profile. It made you smile for some reason.

“Yeah. I don’t know what happens but-”

“Do you regret it?”

The question made you rise from his side, leaning over to face him. 

“No. No part of me regrets it so far, as much as I should?”

“As much as you should?”

“Yeah,” you laughed, “you know, because we ‘hate’ each other?’”

“Oh,” Changbin smirked, “yeah, right. Listen, I don’t want to put a label on this right now. Our first focus should be the case.”

“I agree,” you smiled, pressing a quick peck to his lips.

“Awesome. I’m really sorry about lying to you as well. I felt like if I didn’t say those things, you wouldn’t have jumped on board with the case.”

“Look I get it, but please just don’t lie to me again. I always prefer honesty, and value it, now more than ever”

“Got it. I have one more thing I wanted to bring up.”

“God you talk a lot,” you whined in a joking manner, “what is it now.”

“At the precinct, we should keep things the way you are.”

“What do you mean? Like continue to argue in front of everyone like we normally do?”

“Yeah,” he paused, unsure if you were on the same page, “just so people don’t become suspicious. I personally am a very private person when it comes to my personal life. I’m sorry if that offends-”

“I am on the same page. Felix and Hyunjin already interrogated me about today. I don’t need that from everybody else.”

“Great. Should we work on the case now?”

“Totally.”

You smiled, getting up from the sofa as you found your clothes in a messy pile on the floor, simultaneously watching the pompous lawyer’s muscles bulge and flex as he also put his clothes back on. It shouldn’t have hurt your feelings, but there was a gentle pang at the bottom of your heart that he wanted to keep things casual. It didn’t matter anyway though, because once the case was over, the two of you would go back to normal. 

Barely seeing each other and bickering when you did, right?

Secret Secret Chapter 1

OT8 Straykids x reader, ABO AU

When a new translation position opened up at your dream job, you were quick to apply. You met all the qualifications, had glowing reviews, and knew you were a perfect fit. There was only one problem. JYP only hired beta's. And you were not a beta.

Story Warnings: Suggestive Themes, Eventual Smut, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Heats/Ruts, Discrimination, Angst, Slow Burn

Masterlist | Part 2

You looked up at the towering glass building with your heart in your throat. There were people walking in and out of the building with ease, likely workers or personal for JYP who didn’t think twice about their positions, about how much you longed to be a part of them.

You had been gunning for this opportunity for years, but now that you were finally there, your feet refused to move. You turned your focus away from the building and spotted a group of three girls all huddled together with their eyes laser focused on the entrance, whispering to each other.

No doubt fans trying to catch a glimpse of their favorite idols.

You let out a sigh. “Okay, it’s okay. You can do this. It’s fine, you got this.”

With a nod to yourself, you dragged your feet forward and practically stumbled through the front doors. The girls from before giggled loudly behind you, and you refused to look back. You hoped nobody else noticed.

You walked over to the reception desk quickly, giving the receptionist a blinding smile to hide your nervousness. His scent reminded you of sugared candy and smelled of beta, but you of all people knew how deceiving scents could be. After all, it was the entire reason you were here to begin with.

“Ah, hello,” You said. “I’m here for a job interview? For the translator position?”

He nodded his head in understanding. You gave him your name and he pulled out a lanyard with the words ‘VISITOR’ printed on it, handing it over along with a quick explanation of where you had to go. You thanked him with a bow, and made your way to the elevators, repeating the direction to yourself.

Second floor, third door to the left. Second floor, third door to the left.

It wouldn’t do you any good to get lost before you even had a chance to get the job. The elevator was quick, the doors opening smoothly with a ding. There was a mirror at the back of the elevator, and taking advantage of nobody else being in there with you, you quickly adjusted your clothes and fixed a stray strand of hair that was sticking out, making sure your face didn’t give away your panic.

You also made sure to quickly smell your wrists, relieved that the perfume you had put on before leaving the house was still strong. The scent blockers would block out your own scent to the rest of the world, and it would draw too many questions from the company you were trying to interview for. The specific perfume you had on was a lovely jasmine scent, and clearly a beta scent.

It was essential for you, considering you weren’t a beta.

You were an omega.

The elevator doors opened onto the second floor and even though you knew where you had to go -Second floor, third door to the left-, you still took a moment to stop in front of the desk to double check you were heading in the right direction. The beta receptionist up here showed a lot more expressions than the one downstairs, giving you a blinding smile and wishing you luck. You thanked her with a small nod, and made your way to the third door to the left.

You paused right outside the door, taking another deep breath.

“You got this,” You whispered to yourself again.

You knew you were qualified. You had a recommendation from your last company, glowing reviews from your manager who had been disappointed to see you go, but knowing that you had bigger dreams than translating for a legal firm. Working in the entertainment industry was your dream job, and JYP was one of the top entertainment companies in the business. This was a big opportunity.

But you knew the one thing you had going against you, was your presentation.

JYP only hired betas. They had for years, and even as the world pushed for equal rights among Omega’s and Alpha’s, the truth was that so many companies hesitated to hire them due to their stereotypes and requirements. And while JYP openly accepted trainees of all presentations, their staff were held to a higher standard.

Omega’s were too emotional. Omega’s needed protection, staff members were expected to protect. Omega’s had heats and would take time off work. Omega’s would want to start families. Omega’s were more likely to develop romantic feelings.

Omega’s were a liability.

You frowned at your reflection in the mirror. All those harsh words that had been thrown at you every time you complained about all the jobs that turned you down. Words said by strangers, friends, even family. Every person who tried to excuse their own biases and refusing to change anything. You wanted to prove them wrong.

“You got this,” You repeated, nodding to yourself.

You were going to prove them wrong. You had to.

Even if you had to lie to do it.

You knocked on the door, and the woman on the other side called you in after only a moment. You made sure to bow to the three people in the conference room as you entered, sitting down at the opposite end of the table from them. You knew how this was supposed to go, since you had done it many times before.

‘I see here you speak 5 languages. Where did you learn them?’

‘You have traveled and worked in other countries? What was that experience like?’

‘We received a glowing recommendation. Why did you decide to leave your last job?’

And just like always, the questions began to get a little too predictable.

‘Are you married, or in a relationship?’

‘Why not?’

‘Are you interested in a relationship?’

And then came the dreadful question.

‘What’s your presentation?’

They always asked you that. Every time, even though you knew full well that they had your resume right in front of them, that they could see it for themselves. It frustrated you, because it had nothing to do with your work. Because you were still obligated to put down your presentation on your resume by law. Because employers would still discriminate against you because of it.

You forced a smile on your face. “I’m a beta, as you can see.”

It wasn’t a crime to lie about your presentation anymore than it was to lie about your gender. Your old boss made sure of it. He was one of the few employers who fought to have you on his team, even when so many other companies and workplaces advised against it, tried to tell him about the downsides to working with an omega.

He had scoffed at them. “Bunch of old fashions dumbasses.”

You loved your old boss.

So unless the company had access to your medical records (which they didn’t), or somehow found a copy of your birth certificate (which you hoped they didn’t, that wouldn’t make any sense), they had no way of doubting your lie.

Which is why you wore the fake scented perfume you had gotten from a lovely little store near your apartment that specifically targeted trans-presentations. You weren’t unhappy with being an omega (just unhappy at the way the world treated them), but the false scents they sold to help those who were had been a god send in making sure you appeared to the words as what you wanted them to think of you as.

If it helped you get the job, you would be a beta for as long as it took.

And with the forced smile still pulling at your cheeks, you were complimented on your outstanding qualifications and experience, and told that they would call you back soon with more information. You thanked them for their time with another bow, and although you weren’t in the clear just yet, let out a sigh of relief the moment you made it back out into the halls.

The young beta girl behind the desk gave you another smile as you passed, and you made sure to thank her for her hard work as you made your ways to the elevator. The beta from the front desk didn’t even look at you twice as you walked through the lobby, but you didn’t mind him, knowing he was busy and had work to do.

The girls from before were gone, and the doors to the building opened and closed as people entered and existed. Birds chirped from somewhere above you.

You crossed your fingers, and prayed.

-0-0-

“Oh my god! OH MY GOD!” You screeched.

“What?! WHAT?!”

Sooyoung, your roommate, looked up from her phone with wide eyes in a panic at your shouts of excitement. You held out your phone to her, but before she could even make out the words on the screen, you were already pulling it back to stare at it in awe.

“I got accepted!” You squealed.

Sooyoung gasped. “You got the job?!”

“I GOT THE JOB!”

“Ahhhh!” Sooyoung screamed in excitement, throwing her own phone to the side and jumping up next to you, both of you hopping around the room. “Oh my god, do you know what this means?”

“That I’m going to need a whole lot more scent blocker?”

“No- well, yes.” Sooyoung stopped hopping, looking up in thought. “Actually, yeah. You’re going to need a shit ton of that stuff. And more of the perfume, now that I think about it.”

You visibly drooped. “Man, it’s a good thing I’m going to be making bank at this job, because that stuff is expensive.”

“Not the point. I was going to say, we need to celebrate,” Sooyoung concluded with her hands in the air.

You laughed at her. “Celebrate lying to my employers?”

“Celebrate sticking it to the man! You are braver than I am, that’s for sure.”

You shook you head in amusement, but her words did make you want to throttle someone momentarily. Sooyoung had been dealing with the exact same discrimination you had, but as an alpha, her battle was targeted more towards those who questioned her aggression and instability, especially ‘as a woman alpha’, as one employer had put it. Seeing as Sooyoung was desperate to work in education, those harmful stereotypes made it impossible to get anyone to trust her around children.

She was making do working at a community college at the moment, but you knew her real dream was to work with preschool aged children.

“It doesn’t make much of a difference,” She had explained to you once. “I swear most of my students act like children anyways, the only difference is they don’t have the excuse of being literally 5.”

You had encouraged her to keep trying, that there was going to be a school out there somewhere that would see past her presentation, but she had already lost hope. You hoped that your own success might encourage her to do something similar, but you knew that wouldn’t fix the real problem. The deep-rooted issues and the systemic injustice.

But that was a can of worms you didn’t want to open at the moment.

Instead, you agreed to a night out on the town (as Sooyoung put it), and with her encouragement, went to go get ready. She had clicked her tongue at your first outfit, scoffed at the second, and rolled her eyes at the third.

“Babe, are you even trying?”

“What’s wrong with this?” You said with a pout, looking down at yourself.

You had chosen a pair of tight jeans that made your ass look good, and a cute white shirt that had a crisscrossing pattern that hugged your waist. If you threw your hair up in a ponytail and added some dark makeup, you would look like you were straight off the set of a kpop music video. But apparently that wasn’t the vibe Sooyoung was looking for.

“Don’t get me wrong, you look good,” She assured as she dug through your closet. “But we want you to look better than good. I want every man and woman to do a double take when you pass by. I want you to be the best dish at the table.”

You laughed. “I thought we were just going out for some fun. Some drinks, hit up a club or something … you sound like you’re trying to get me laid.”

She winked at you. “Who says we can’t do both?”

Typical of Sooyoung. She had been trying to hook you up with someone since you broke up with your ex a few months ago, but you had been so busy with work and then planning out your interview, so you hadn’t had time to think about sex.

Now having a new job and unknown responsibilities for the foreseeable future, getting one last hoorah before you had to be at work in two days sounded like a great opportunity.

You let out an exaggerated sigh. “Well okay then. Let’s see what you got for me.”

Turns out that while Sooyoung loved teaching kids, she could very well get a job as a professional stylist. You hadn’t even been aware that you had a black dress, but she had pulled it out of somewhere. It was … tight. It looked amazing on you, you would admit that, but it was so short and so tight that you felt like you were going to flash someone if you bent over. Thankfully, Sooyoung managed to pair it off with a slightly longer skirt that blended seamlessly with the dress, giving the illusion that it was longer than it actually was.

“Got to leave something up to the imagination,” She had told you.

With the way that the guys at the club were eyeing you, you weren’t sure that really mattered. You hadn’t cared at first, the drinks you had doing wonders in making you not care about the rest of the world and what they thought, but you had reached a point in the night where you didn’t want to drink anymore, but it didn’t seem like Sooyoung was ready to go home just yet.

Unlike you, she didn’t have a limit. She was still going at it strong on the dance floor, pulling some poor omega guy against her and stinking up the area with horny pheromones.

Although, its was a club. There was a lot of that going around.

The stares your were receiving combined with the heavy scents that were being released was starting to make you feel uncomfortable. It didn’t help that you were free of scent blockers tonight, and you were undoubtedly an omega to anyone who got a little too close. You hated their predatory looks turned downright sinister when they thought you would be easy.

“What’s a pretty little omega like you doing all by themselves?” One Alpha tried, and you bared your teeth at him when he released his heavy scent on you.

Your omega cried out at the thought of an alpha, but you were not controlled by your secondary gender. He obviously wasn’t expecting you to fight back, probably wanting some submissive and breed able omega that would let him do whatever he wanted to them. When you told him to fuck off, he gave you a nasty look, but thankfully did as he was told.

You were grateful he didn’t try to push It farther.

Sooyoung caught your eye from across the room, eyebrow raised in question.

You good?

You gave her a thumbs up.

All good.

Satisfied, Sooyoung went back to dancing with … you weren’t sure. It was a girl this time, but you couldn’t tell her presentation from this far away. Whoever it was, they looked like they were having fun. You downed the rest of your drink, and making sure Sooyoung saw you gesture towards the bathrooms, you went to get a break from all the lights and noises.

The hallway leading to the bathroom had a few patrons loitering around away from the loud music and chatting, but it was far less crowded than the main room. The bathroom itself was empty, and you just took a second to breathe.

After two hours out, you were starting to get tired. Sooyoung had a lot more stamina than you did, and she wouldn’t hesitate to end the night right now if you asked her too. But although she had used your new job position as an excuse to go out and have some fun, you knew that this was a night off for her just as much as it was for you. She needed this, and you didn’t want to end her fun just yet.

Besides, you had a plan of your own.

You had downed enough glasses of water and spent enough time off to the side that you had sobered up, and with your mind and thoughts clear, you decided it was time to go get some. You pushed your dress down a little to where your cleavage was on display, fixed your hair, and gave yourself a wink in the mirror.

“You got this.”

You exited the bathroom with the full intention of heading out to the dance floor and looking for someone to have a good time with, but you practically ran out and straight into someone else who was leaning against the wall right next to the door. You nearly knocked them over, and immediately reached out to steady them.

“Shit. I’m am so sorry.”

“Ah, it’s okay,” They reassured you, mouth muffled by the mask they were wearing. “I should have realized standing next to the bathroom door was a bad idea.”

“Oh no, that was all me,” You said, giving the guy a look over.

He wasn’t very tall, but not that short either. His mouth was covered by a black surgical mask, the kind most people in Korea wore when flu season made its rounds, or when the air quality wasn’t very good. It was odd to see someone wearing that kind of mask in a club, but not entirely unheard of.

Besides his black mask, he also wore an entirely black outfit. A black shirt, black sweatpants, and a black hoodie that his most of his hair, although a couple of dark strands could be seen from the sides. He looked more like a college student on their way back home from long hours of studying than someone who was out for a night on the town, like he would be more comfortable at home with friends than a club in the middle of the city.

“Ah, no worries. I guess you can say I fell for you.”

The guy chuckled at his own words, an awkward laugh to a stupid pick-up line that normally would have you rolling your eyes, but the way he said it, like an offhanded joke, had you giggling along with him. His scent wafted over to you in the narrow hallway, a mix of floral and fruity. It reminded you of the beach.

You bit your lip, looking up at him from beneath your lashes. “Well, what can I say. I guess I just have that effect on people.”

His scent grew stronger at your words, and though his eyebrows raised in surprise, there was a pleased hint to his scent. It smelled like alpha, and your omega perked up her metaphorical ears in interest.

“Ah, I don’t doubt that,” He mused, leaning against the wall and tilting his head at you, eyes darting down your figure.

Your stomach flipped under his gaze, your own scent undoubtedly giving away your interest, so there was no reason to play coy. Instead, you gave him a flirtatious smile, deciding to shoot your shot.

“So, what are you doing hanging out outside the woman’s bathroom?”

It was only once you had spoken that you realized how accusatory your words sounded, and you wanted to wince in embarrassment. The men’s bathroom door was directly in front of the woman’s bathroom. For all you knew, he was waiting for a friend, or maybe the stalls were all occupied, and he was waiting for someone to leave, or literally any other reason.

He let out a laugh. “That does look a little bad, huh?”

“I didn’t mean it like that,” You tried to explain, feeling like you had just completely vanished any energy that had started to build.

“No, it’s okay.” He giggled to himself. “I guess I was just waiting for a beautiful lady to fall into my arms.”

“I guess you’ll have to keep waiting, because I’m not exactly in your arms,” You shot back.

“Well that can be arranged.” It was your turn to raise your eyebrows, and the guy backed down immediately with an embarrassed laugh, hands reaching up to hide his face. “I’m sorry, that was a little much.”

Your legs moved forward on instinct, hands reaching up to grab his own in a soft grip. You pulled them away from his face until you could see him clearly, the small expanse of skin that you could see behind the mask turning red, dark eyes staring into yours. You swallowed, giving him a nervous smile of your own.

“Not at all,” You said, softer than before. Your eyes darted down to his masked face, and you wished you could see beneath it. “I … I wouldn’t mind.”

“Being in my arms?”

“Or anything else you offered,” You said.

The energy way back as if it had never left, a heavy haze falling over the two of you. His skin was warm, pupils dilating, and his scent became heavy with arousal, your body immediately reacting by pushing out your own vanilla scent in hopes that it would attract the perfect mate. From in your head, your omega was practically begging for you to make this man your own.

You were finding it hard to argue.

He flipped your grips around so that your hands were now in his. One of your hands was pulled up to his face, your arm twisted so that your wrist was now next to his mask, and you wondered just how much of your scent he was able to pick up from behind the mask. It must have been enough for him to understand because his eyes crinkled as if he was smiling.

“Anything I offered, huh?”

“I mean, if you’re offering,” You said shyly, batting your eyelashes at him.

He let out a huff of laughter, and you used the position of your arms to wrap them around his neck, pulling your body close to his. His grip dropped from your hands and to your waist, stopping you from moving closer.

“And if I said I wasn’t interested?” He asked.

You froze. “Well then this would be very awkward.”

“Ah, don’t worry.” He pulled you up against him completely, one of your knees hitting the wall behind him, a thigh slotting perfectly in between your legs, your chests pressed together. Your face was so close to his that you could feel the cloth of his mask brushing up against your nose. “I’m interested.”

“Great,” You replied, voice breathy.

“There is a bit of a hiccup, however-“

“Is it the mask?” You interrupted.

His eyes crinkled again. “Ah, am I that obvious?”

“I don’t mind,” You reassured him.

You didn’t care why he had the mask on. There were tons of reasons for it, from privacy to insecurities, that were none of your business. You told him as much, and his body seemed to relax slightly against your own, the tropical mix of his scent showing he was relieved at your acceptance. You found your nose drifting close to his neck, to the scent gland in front of you.

This close to him, his scent was thick enough you could practically taste it.

“We can make it work,” You told him, head feeling fuzzy from the sudden onslaught of alpha pheromones. Your omega was embarrassingly close. “Your place or mine?”

“Yours.” He didn’t even hesitate.

And that was how you found yourself pushing yourself into the crowd to get to Sooyoung, letting the alpha stranger that you just needed to give a heads up to your roommate. It wasn’t until she spotted you, letting out a yell of excitement and pulling you towards her, that you realized you didn’t even know the alpha’s name.

Whatever. I wasn’t like you were planning on marrying the guy.

You didn’t even need to explain much to your roommate, the face she made when she got a whiff of you telling her everything she needed to know. She yelled at you to wear protection and you flushed when the eyes of everyone around you turned in your direction, so you made a quick retreat shortly after.

It wouldn’t be until later the next day that you would explain the entire interaction to Sooyoung over a late afternoon brunch. She congratulated you for finally getting out of your rut (pun intended), and you found out that Sooyoung had managed to snag not just the omega she had been dancing with for half of the night, but also the cute beta girl who had joined them later on.

All in all, it felt like a successful night out.

-0-0-

It was only your first day, and you were already feeling a little overwhelmed at the sudden change in your environment. It wasn’t your first time translating in an official business setting, but law firms were much different than a kpop agency, and all the new rules and regulations made your head spin. Thankfully, you were used to doing paperwork, so the sheer number of NDAs you had to read through was familiar for you. It took nearly three hours of your time just to finish signing things, going through an orientation of sorts, and to be introduced to the office where you would be working. You understood why you had been called in so early.

Park Jeonhui, the head translator for JYP entertainment, sat you down around noon to explain the situation to you.

“The past few years, we’ve kept up pretty well with having only a few translators, only hiring extra when necessary, but recently we’ve had more groups to manage, which means more material, more opportunities, and unfortunately, more demand. Specifically, it’s no longer possible for the few translators we have to constantly be jumping from group to group when they are needed.”

You nodded in understanding, and she handed over a folder to you.

“Due to this increase in demand and the multiple world tours that are planned for the near future, it was the companies decision to hire translators who would focus on a specific group. Due to the languages you speak and your experience, we have decided to place you on the team for Stray Kids. Have you heard of them?”

You had, indeed, heard of them. While you weren’t a huge fan (you were much more of a Once than a Stay), you had heard their music and watched their music videos. You probably wouldn’t be able to recognize any of the members if you saw them on the street, however.

“You’ll be meeting with Stray Kids manager and their leader today to go over their current projects and your work expectations.”

“Sounds good.”

“Before that, however, I was wondering if you had any questions?”

It seemed like the perfect opportunity. You physically had to bite your tongue to keep from asking her why the company didn’t hire omega’s or alphas, knowing it was neither the time for that kind of question (you didn’t need to put yourself under scrutiny so soon), nor was it the person you should be questioning. Jeonhui was just the translation head, she didn’t decide company policy.

Even if it was a stupid policy.

“Well in that case, I’ll let them know we’ll be finishing up soon.”

When an older man knocked on the conference door to ask for Jeonhui’s help with something, you took the opportunity to pull out your phone and quickly check out yourself in the front camera, making sure you looked presentable. Your old boss had drilled into you enough time the importance of looking professional in front of clients, and while neither the manager nor leader of Stray Kids were your clients (if anything, they were your bosses), those old habits were kicking in. You were thankful that you decided to at least wear your best professional shirt, a casual white button down.

Jeonhui thanked the guy, and while the first man bowed and left the doorway, Jeonhui remained at the door. She stepped forward and bowed to someone else you couldn’t see, and after a quick exchange of words, she moved to the side.

Two men walked in.

The first one was a dark-haired guy who seemed young, but older than you. His beta scent was stronger than most people, but calm enough that it didn’t bother you. He seemed laid back and easy-going, wearing comfortable clothes as opposed to the professional outfit you had seen other managers use. He bowed at you, introducing himself as the Stray Kids manager, and as you stood up to bow at him in return, he took his seat at the head of the table.

And from behind him appeared a younger man, closer to your age. He was handsome with dark hair and soft eyes, his smile revealing dimples as he chatted briefly with Jeonhui. The normally stoic and polite beta woman seemed to melt in the stranger’s presence, a soft smile on her face. It was jarring. The young man then turned to you, and you once again bowed, but when you raised your head, all you could see on his face was shock.

You were confused, worried if you had accidentally done something you shouldn’t have, but then his scent reached you.

Floral and fruity, like sunscreen and pina colada and the hot sun on sand.

You froze, sharing the wide-eyed gaze with this complete stranger, who wasn’t actually a complete stranger.

Soft moans, fingers brushing up against your thighs as you were filled deliciously from behind, another moan forced out of your mouth as he wrapped his fingers gently around your throat, lips brushing up against the shell of your ear.

“God, you’re so tight.”

You nearly chocked on your spit.

The man you had unintentionally had a one night stand with two nights ago was the leader of Stray Kids.

Your boss.

“Alpha, please!”

“Just a little longer,. You can hold on just a little longer, cant you? Hmm? Don’t you want to be good for your Alpha?”

You were so close. Your body felt like it was on fire and your head spun, the darkness that seemed to engulf you left your nerve endings so sensitive, and you couldn’t see him, could think, couldn’t do anything more than accept the pleasure he was giving you. He seemed to know that you were at your breaking point, because as a whine began to build in your throat, he pulled away.

His fingers pressed right where you needed them most, and you found yourself spiraling.

“Cum for me, Omega.”

And he knew your secret.