Me In An Interrogation Room: It Wasn't My Fault.

Me in an interrogation room: It wasn't my fault.

Police officer: My file says that there were ten knife wounds. You stabbed him.

Me: No. He ran into my knife. He ran into my knife ten times.

I would KILL for a retelling of the PJO series from Annabeth's POV and have it be exactly like this.

So Percy, being a sweetheart, was the kind of narrator to show us what a simp he was. Mr. Annabeth-was-getting-seriously-beautiful was perfectly fine spending passages talking about his future GF.

I just wanna establish that Annabeth as a narrator in the original PJO series would have be FERAL. She has a perfectly logical/more objective account of everything that happened except when it comes to Percy. Then suddenly it’s:

“What in the name of the gods is this? He decided to get attractive? When I specifically prayed and asked Aphrodite not to make him more attractive? I’m not shallow. Of course I’m not shallow. I just - I’m gonna kick his ass-"

“It’s not that I like him. I just think anyone who makes him sad should be dipped into a vat of hot oil.”

“Look, Percy’s smart. We don’t talk about it because he isn’t allowed to know, but he really is. The problem is that he can be the smartest person in the room, but miss things because he’s kind of a pessimist with self-esteem issues. I swear I’m going to fight him over it.”

“I laughed. What? It was funny. Just because he’s a son of Poseidon doesn’t mean he can’t be funny. What are you? The funny police? He said one funny thing. Back off.”

“I’m not in love with my best friend, okay? But by Hades and Zeus and Poseidon himself this random mortal girl better not be in love with him either. Why is she coloring on her jeans? Isn’t she rich? Buy a freaking notebook. The worst part is that I think I would normally like her. I’m just filled with this....rage that has absolutely nothing to do with Percy at all. You know, I bet this random rage is a sign from the gods. I shouldn’t trust her, right? Right.”

“....listen. We don’t need to talk about Mt. Saint Helens. What happened there happened. I made a tactical decision. As a daughter of Athena I don’t need to explain myself to random mortals. Leave me alone-”

“So what? I took the knife for him. Like you wouldn’t? We would all take the knife for Percy, calm down. It means absolutely nothing. Mind your business.”

“I know this may come as a shock to you, but... I think I like Percy. As more than a friend. I’ll give you a brief moment to be surprised since I did an excellent job keeping it under wraps.”

“So, I’m dating this dork of a demigod who is the best and a child of prophecy and the most loyal and funny and sarcastic and supportive and best person in the world and I’m allowed to gush a little because it’s been years of pent up affection and I bet none of you even saw this coming!”

“Bitch took my boyfriend. It’s been like three months.”

Afsfshsijdbsilabs

I finally kiss her but oh no

I see a FACE IN MY WINDOW

THEN MY BRAIN STARTS TO GO

Anti anxiety.

I just had an idea. It's probably been thought of before, but imagine going to the library or bookstore with your significant annoyance and picking out books for each other. I can just imagine my partner picking out all of the books that are on my TBR list and me accusing them of cheating because "of course I'm gonna like it, I literally picked it out." And then we can go to a little cafe or coffee shop, or just go home and read together.

Oh my gods, I want this in a relationship.

I'm going to be thinking about this for the next month.

Amazing