There's A New Sheriff In Town

There's a new sheriff in town

Forgiveness is such a trap and I honestly highly recommend not forgiving people who’ve done irreparable damage in your life. Despite what people say, you don’t need to forgive someone to have peace in your life.

Being on tumblr is like being a raccoon. I dig through the garbage for shiny things I like. Sometimes I find good things to share with my friends. Sometimes I find something horrifying, and also share it with my friends.

Wait but tell me more, what kind of math does our godforsaken measuring system make sense for? I'm horribly curious!

oh dear oh boy okay, I’ve tried to explain this to people and had them just get more annoyed, so I’ll give it a shot, but no promises that it will make any sense. Disclaimer also that I don’t really know what I’m talking about, I’ve just done a lot of baking, and ages ago I read something by Plato explaining why the musical scale is how it is, and I’m extrapolating from the two

(wow this turned out way longer than I meant it to because IT’S MIDNIGHT)

the metric system is a base 10 system, like most modern human math, so it is easy to use in the way people tend to do math these days - ie, by sitting down with either a piece of paper or a calculator and doing sums. It’s a good system for a lot of things, especially scientific applications where you need to be VERY precise and don’t want to waste time converting units, and need to do shit like calculus. It’s a highly rational way of doing it…if you are literate.

if you aren’t literate, or are less literate, it’s not a sensible way to construct a measuring system at all. If you measure something and come up with 367.45 cm, that’s nothing. You’re going to forget it, and you can’t easily divide it by anything, there’s no way to go from here

But consider the English Foot. We’ve all been working with a base 12 system without realizing it, and without really utilizing it for what it’s best for, which is easy mental division. This is where people get mad at me, they say math all gets terrible and ugly when you do it in feet, you end up trying to figure out how many sixteenths of an inch 0.135 is, or you end up with repeating decimals, and it all sucks super bad. To this I say yes, it does, because you’re thinking like a modern algebra student, and not like a medieval bricklayer.

The base 12 system of the traditional English foot is fantastic for mental math, because 12 is a highly divisible number. It’s easily divisible into halves, thirds, quarters, and sixths by most people in their heads. The inch is then typically divided into 1/16ths, which *super* suck to deal with on a calculator, but are really quite friendly if you just keep them as fractions like God and the Magna Carta intended. This is the kind of math most artisans need to do. You want supports placed evenly along a wall, to divide a piece of fabric in half, or to double a recipe. Nobody 1.7x’s a recipe. Metric would be great for that, but why would you do that? It wouldn’t be worth the math involved.

And listen, I also use a lot of metric baking recipes. Everything is in grams, you can measure everything the same way, and it’s super accurate. They’re great if you have a digital scale, but before the age of digital scales? Unfathomable. You (a medieval peasant) have a cup you’ve decided is The Cup, and sometimes you put in a half or a third or a quarter of that cup. THAT makes sense. Also, it’s a lot easier to double something that calls for 1 cup of flour than it is when it calls for 136 grams of flour, and this is for me, a person who learned math in the typical modern way and always has a calculator in their pocket. I would have the sourdough recipe I make every week memorized if it wasn’t in fucking grams. I DO have my pie crust recipe memorized. For every cup of flour you put in a third of a cup shortening, one tablespoon of butter, and start with 3 tablespoons of water (and a dash of salt). A double crust pie takes about 3 cups of flour, so that’s one cup shortening. Easy! A third of a cup of shortening in grams is 68.3333333. That’s nothing! That’s garbage!

“Wouldn’t it be more accurate to measure 68.3333333 grams, though?” Sure, but the amount of wet indigence you need to put in any baked thing changes with the fucking weather! That’s why this recipe says “start with 3 tbs water.” There’s no need to be more accurate, and in fact it would make things more difficult.

Okay that turned into a tangent about how to make pie crust, a thing I think everyone should learn because pie crust is delicious, but i hope you get the idea. TLDR sometimes you just want to divide things in thirds and have it not suck ass. The eldritch sigil of measurement conversions is a little less threatening if you realize every step up or down is a factor of thirds or fourths

fuck oh no another half remembered piece of pop science coming at you - the largest number a typical human can hold in their head *without language* is 3. You don’t need numbers to count to three, you don’t need to count to be aware of three, you can just see three things and say “that’s three.” Don’t believe me? That’s the whole basis of Roman numerals. The numbers 1-3 are representational, after that they get more symbolic, and you never end up with more than three of the same symbol in a row. After III comes IV, not IIII, and it’s just that III is much easier on the brain. For the same reason, a lot of English conversions are in factors of 4. There are 4 cups in a quart, and 4 quarts in a gallon, so you’re only dealing with measurements that are easy to hold in your head without counting. You never have to count out 4 cups if you convert. You either need 3 cups or 1 quart. Does that make sense? Anyone who has done Big Cooking should know that if you have to count cups beyond 3 or 4 it becomes very easy to lose track.

Now i’m not saying it’s all logical. It would be great if every step was a factor of 4, but they had to get fancy and throw pints in there. Pints aren’t too bad, that’s a factor of two, but I’ll be the first to admit that it makes no sense for one tablespoon to equal three teaspoons instead of four. But because this is a system that evolved over time instead of being constructed intentionally, you have to cut it some slack. I’m sorry to anyone who decided to read this, I should be in bed, but I actually care a lot about this and I swear it’s not just stockholm syndrome from Being American

flail

Maybe getting off work and sitting in front of a different computer and scrolling mindlessly is the same as when our parents (mine, anyway) came home from work and sat and stared mindlessly at a bunch of nothing and empty noise on the TV. But if it isn't it worries me and makes me think my brain has broken and I can't pay attention to anything any more, and so I decided to start crocheting and to make myself learn to knit.

I don't enjoy either one of these things. I think I particularly don't like crochet, for a number of reasons, but I am sure I can learn to particularly not like knitting, too, if I ever get started with it.

A few years ago I did some needlefelting for somewhat different reasons and quickly discovered that the problem with making things is that you end up with piles of things taking up space unless you can find a way to get rid of them, and not that many people really need cute little needlefelted owls or frogs and I maybe can't bear to let them go very much. (Add making a needlefelted frog to the list of things I want to do to prove I can still *do* something, but that has to come after finishing the needlefelted comics character that I started and left to sit when I didn't know what I would do with it).

I had hoped I would find these things meditative and that they would quiet me and help me sleep at night, but they just bore me. I have found them all much less appealing than sitting in front of the computer scrolling mindlessly.

And it's worse when I have a few days off in a row and start to feel human again and think of things I can do and want to do and maybe even start planning, and then I go back to work and in 24 to 36 hours I am back to a mindless scrolling blob of tired.

I am now about halfway through crocheting a very vivid ugly hat.

Classic sea shanties like:

"I fucking hate this ship and I cannot wait to get off."

"I got off the ship on the dock but I know I'm going to get back on the ship when my leave is up. Fuck."

"Storm."

"Big storm."

"Is it just me or does this ship have like. Really clean lines. Like damn. Okay. Not saying I'm feeling attracted to the ship, per se, but. Damn."

"Sometimes you see weird shit that you cannot explain and you just kinda have to shrug and go. Welp."