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Learn to articulate how you're feeling without accusing anyone of having bad intentions. You can say "I'm afraid of being alone" without saying "you're just going to leave me like everyone else." You can say "I need some reassurance" without saying "you probably don't love me anymore." You can say "I'm afraid I've hurt your feelings and I'd like to talk it through" without saying "you don't even like me anymore." You can say "I want to spend more time with you" without saying "you've gotten tired of me." You can say "I feel misunderstood" without saying "you always judge me." Try not to let your emotions get the best of you. Have a conversation focused on finding solutions instead of escalating the conflict.

People that love you, care about how they make you feel.

“Empathy isn’t just something that happens to us—a meteor shower of synapses firing across the brain—it’s also a choice we make: to pay attention, to extend ourselves. It’s made of exertion, that dowdier cousin of impulse. Sometimes we care for another because we know we should, or because it’s asked for, but this doesn’t make our caring hollow. The act of choosing simply means we’ve committed ourselves to a set of behaviors greater than the sum of our individual inclinations: I will listen to his sadness, even when I’m deep in my own. To say “going through the motions”—this isn’t reduction so much as acknowledgment of the effort—the labor, the motions, the dance—of getting inside another person’s state of heart or mind. This confession of effort chafes against the notion that empathy should always arise unbidden, that genuine means the same thing as unwilled, that intentionality is the enemy of love. But I believe in intention and I believe in work. I believe in waking up in the middle of the night and packing our bags and leaving our worst selves for our better ones.”

— Leslie Jamison, “The Empathy Exams” (via The Believer)

Entering the Kingdom by Mary Oliver

“You said you didn’t want to lose me but you weren’t even trying to keep me.”

— Unknown

“Once in a while we meet a gentle person. Gentleness is a virtue hard to find in a society that admires toughness and roughness. We are encouraged to get things done and to get them done fast, even when people get hurt in the process. Success, accomplishment, and productivity count. But the cost is high. There is no place for gentleness in such a milieu. Gentle is the one who does ‘not break the crushed reed, or snuff the faltering wick.’ Gentle is the one who is attentive to the strengths and weaknesses of the other and enjoys being together more than accomplishing something. A gentle person treads lightly, listens carefully, looks tenderly, and touches with reverence. A gentle person knows that true growth requires nurture, not force. Let’s dress ourselves with gentleness. In our tough and often unbending world our gentleness can be a vivid reminder of the presence of God among us.”

— Henri Nouwen (via gloryfromdust)

(Source)

“You know, love doesn’t mean ‘I never want you to change’. But I don’t think it means ‘I don’t care if you change’ either. So I suppose it might mean, ‘I believe that you’ll always be the person I adore’. A declaration of faith, perhaps.”

— Sayaka Saeki, やがて君になる (Bloom into You).

“It took many years of vomiting up all the filth I’d been taught about myself, and half-believed, before I was able to walk on the earth as though I had a right to be here.”

— James Baldwin, The Price of the Ticket

“Chasing you is tiring, but losing you would kill me so I keep running”

- 3am overthinker

my heart goes out to anyone who was made to feel stupid for caring too much. anyone who was laughed at or "cringed" at for being themselves. anyone who cried silently so they don't be a burden. anyone whose love was taken for granted. anyone who feels unsafe in their own bodies. to anyone who felt devastated because others failed to be humane enough. it's not you, it's them. i hope you find a way to love yourself again. you're not alone. you're important.

“I take much pleasure in being alone but there is also a strange warm grace in not being alone.”

— Charles Bukowski (via quotemadness)

Lack of empathy is where I draw the line. If my feelings don’t matter to you, you no longer matter me.

Extra heavy on the “Be safe” and “I love you” because life is so short fr

in my humble opinion, the most beautiful thing abt love is the effort. like the one that doesn't even feel like effort, just deliberate action motivated by pure love and desire to make another person happy. making conscious choices in favour of that person, taking your time to create special moments and rituals, distance nor time notwithstanding

“I give because I know how it feels to want.”

— palmiiier

me: they hurt me!! I’m gonna be distant! that’ll show them!

them: hey

me: hey 💘💓💖💕💓💞💕💗💝💓💞💝💘💕💕💖💗💘💕💞💘💘💖💗💘💞💕💞💞💕💘💕💖💗💖💕💞💞💖💖💗💖💘💞💫

I cannot stress enough how important it is to speak up for yourself when someone is crossing your boundaries or dismissing your feelings. You are your biggest advocate. No one else can read your mind or feels what you feel.