I Lowkey Wanna Start Writing Fanfictions , Like ,IDK It Lowkey Seems Fun Ngl :33
i lowkey wanna start writing fanfictions , like ,IDK it lowkey seems fun ngl :33
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tumblr users love reading. you literally stopped for this post just because it has words in it























here's a bunch of spongebob titlecards i hoarded
đł <- this emoji but without the blush or romantic connotation. im not blushing im staring you directly in your fucking eyes

I am Wheezing
underneath kitchen lights â james potter x reader
summary â james has a crush on you, lilyâs shy and unbelievably sweet coworker. you nurse a crush of your own. (based on all my ghosts by lizzy mcalpine!)
or .. you got a slurpee for free, I caught you looking at me, in the 7/11 under fluorescent lights. I spilled mac and cheese on my pants, and thought about kissing you underneath kitchen lights!
contains â shy!fem!reader, florist!reader, strangers-ish to friends to lovers, rugby player!james, modern au, flirting, mutual pining, fluff, james being a total sweetheart, sirius being a twat and a good friend, wolfstar because I couldnât resist, kissing, lovesick!james, idiots in love tbh, and ummm lots of references to all my ghosts!!
notes â um I am very nervous to post this. but also please donât let it flop.
fem!reader 8k words
James has an embarrassingly big crush on you. For someone heâs only met twice now, youâre very good at getting stuck in his head. Itâs hardly his fault â youâre lovely. You always smell like flowers (which is kind of a given, he supposes. You work with Lily at Harrietâs, the floristâs down the road). Youâre very pretty. Youâre quiet and a bit shy but youâve spoken enough that James at least knows youâre polite and friendly.
Heâs talked to you a grand total of one time. Youâd exchanged a few words and James had been very very quick to fall in love with everything about you. Your hands as you wrung them in front of you â a shy tell, heâd guessed. Your voice, pretty and soft, and how itâd sounded when you said his name. The way you dressed, your hair, the quirk in your mouth when heâd made a joke, the hitch in your breath when heâd shook your hand. He was a goner the second heâd met you.
âProngs,â drawls Sirius, followed by a hard punch in the bicep. âYou know youâre not as subtle as you think.â
James scowls in the general direction of Siriusâ voice. Heâd been staring at you, heâs sorry to admit. Youâre talking to Lily and youâre smiling about something sheâs said and you just look so pretty.
He badly wants to talk to you properly, he has ever since the first time Lily bought you around to a party like this one, but heâs scared of embarrassing himself. Heâs not exactly the best flirter when it comes to girls he actually likes. His tongue gets all tied and he canât say two words without ultimately embarrassing himself. Heâs not as much of a charmer as everyone thinks he is. Heâs also scared you wonât like him, but he wonât get into that.
âShut up,â he advises Sirius, rubbing his sore arm. âI donât even know what youâre on about.â
Sirius, sprawled on the couch next to James, rolls his eyes and snorts. âYeah, okay,â he says, all sarcasm. âSânot like youâre burning holes into Y/Nâs face or anything.â
For a split second James panics. He whirls around to look at you so fast he almost snaps his neck in half. Have you heard Sirius? Do you think James is a total creep now? No â youâre still engrossed in your conversation with Lily. James breathes a sigh of relief but itâs cut short when he realises Sirius is laughing at him.
âMate,â he guffaws. âYouâre hopeless.â
Itâs Jamesâ turn to roll his eyes. âThanks a lot,â he says dryly.
Sirius grins with all his stupidly perfect teeth. âYâwelcome.â
James sighs and scrubs a heavy hand down his face. Maybe he is as hopeless as Sirius thinks. Heâs certainly feeling quite hopeless right now. With you across the room and him sitting here unable to make himself get up and talk to you. As subtle as he can he twists to look over the back of the couch again to see what youâre doing. Heâs just in time to see you disappearing into the kitchen by yourself, Lily now talking with the other girls by the ranch slider.
His heart rate spikes. This is his chance.
James is getting to his feet before he knows what heâs doing. He dodges another hearty punch from Sirius, pretends not to hear Lily when she asks him where heâs going, and follows you into the kitchen on clumsy feet like a puppy on a leash.
He stumbles into Lilyâs kitchen and there you are. Standing with your head in the fridge, the bright white lights cast over your skin. And thereâs a lot of skin to look at. Your shoulders, your upper back. Thereâs a beauty spot on your back, just next to your shoulder blade. Your dress floats just above the halfway point of your thighs. Youâve got really nice legs. James snaps his eyes back up to your head before he can feel too guilty and clears his throat.
You start and then whirl around, eyes wide as saucers, one hand curled around the fridge door.
âOh,â you say, breathless. âJames. You scared me.â
James is so busy melting over the way you say his name that he almost forgets to speak. âSorry. Shit, Iâm sorry, Y/N, I didnât mean to.â
You shake your head and your big dangly earrings jingle like bells. âNo, itâs okay. Donât be sorry.â
You smile all soft and pretty and James really thinks he might pass out. He steps forward and leans against the kitchen island as casually as he can, when really heâs using it for support lest he keel over.
Youâre looking at him like youâre expecting him to say something. He clears his throat again.
âUm,â he starts lamely. He braves through. âI, umâ you look really nice tonight. I wanted to tell you earlier but Lilyâs been stuck to you like a leech since you got here.â
You blink at him and James worries heâs said the wrong thing. Maybe this was the worst idea heâs ever had. And heâs had a lot of bad ideas. But then you beam.
âOh,â you say, shocked like you canât quite believe it. Which should be impossible, really, James thinks. Youâre beautiful. Itâs hard not to believe it. âThank you, James.â
James smiles back. Your shyness at being complimented only fuels him. âYouâre welcome. Just donât tell Lily I called her a leech.â At this, you giggle, and James stammers through his next words, dazed from your laugh. âSo, uhâ are you looking for a drink?â
He gestures to the fridge, which you seem to have forgotten about, the door hanging wide open under your grip.
âWhat? Oh,â you say sheepishly, and suddenly youâre embarrassed and staring at your shoes. âNo, IâmâŚâ You lift your head and blink at him under your lashes. âPromise you wonât laugh at me?â
James is perplexed, but heâs not gonna laugh at you if you donât want him to. He licks his dry lips. âYeah, I promise.â
You smile, then dip your head towards him like youâre sharing secrets. âI was cooling off,â you admit, sheepish. âIt got too hot in the living room and Lilyâs patio has mosquitos.â You hardly give him time to reply before youâre cringing, saying, âItâs weird, right?â Like you know heâs gonna think itâs strange.
He doesnât think itâs strange. Well, maybe a little. But heâs been found in worse positions at parties. You look so embarrassed about it James is almost sorry he asked. Almost, because embarrassed you is adorable. You lean back and scrub your neck awkwardly, bracelets clanking on your wrist.
âNo, I know,â he groans sympathetically, nodding vehemently. âLily really needs a mosquito net or something, so we can open the damn door without getting eaten alive. Can I join you?â
You look baffled for a moment, and then shy all over again.
âYou want to join me while I stick my head in the fridge?â You ask, an amusement to your tone that James adores.
James shrugs. âWhy not?â
You smile outright then. âOkay,â you say, stepping aside so thereâs more room in front of the fridge for him. âCâmon, then.â
James practically skips over to you. The moment he steps into your space he can smell your lovely scent. Flowery and sweet, something floral like hyacinth mixed with something sweet like honey. Itâs intoxicating. He feels like he could drown in it. But thereâs no time for drowning, not when your hand wraps around his elbow and pulls him into your side, your feet shuffling to accommodate him.
âMove closer,â you urge shyly. âYou gotta get the full experience.â
James moves closer. So close his arm brushes yours and he could hold your hand if he wanted to. He very much wants to. He imagines your skin is as soft as it looks.
The coldness of the refrigerator washes over him and itâs actually really nice. Even though he can be a total party animal sometimes, he understands why you would be here instead of in there. Itâs quiet in here. Nice and cool. No lingering scent of heavy wine. No Sirius to tease him and no Marlene to badger him with questions about his love life.
âThis is nice,â he says quietly, over the gentle buzz of the fridge.
You giggle softly. James thinks heâd like to make you laugh a million times over. âIsnât it?â
âMm,â James hums. âI should do this at parties more often.â
You laugh again, delighted at his joking. âYou should. Then I wouldnât be so lonely when I escape to the kitchen.â
James laughs too. He canât quite believe his luck right now, squished in front of Lilyâs refrigerator with you, elbow to elbow, the rest of his friends and the party long forgotten.
âI think Iâll take you up on that offer,â he says, smiling big.
The next time James sees you, it doesnât go quite as well as previously. To put it simply, itâs a disaster.
First of all, heâs late. Remus and Sirius are having a housewarming party at their new place and heâs had training all day so heâd forgotten all about it. Itâs not until 9:30, an hour after the party was supposed to start, that heâs climbing in his car after training and his phone buzzes.
He picks it up, exhausted, expecting one of his teammates. Instead itâs a string of messages from Remus.
Youâre late James!!!!
We started without u. Where r u????
Sirius is gonna wring ur neck
James scrolls through the messages with a mixture of confusion and dread. Confusion because at first he has absolutely no idea what Remus is talking about. Dread when he realises.
He speeds all the way home, showers at lightning speed, pulls on a rumpled shirt and a pair of jeans that heâs sure arenât clean, and heâs out the door within ten minutes of getting home. Still, by the time he gets to Sirius and Remusâ place itâs almost 10. His hair looks a mess but itâll have to do. He doesnât even think about the fact that you could possibly be there. That is, until heâs finished apologising profusely to his friends and Sirius mentions you. James perks up from where heâd been slumping on the couch, feeling exhausted and sorry for himself.
âWhat?â He asks, too loud. He tries to tamp it down but honestly, it doesnât really work. Heâs still buzzing with nervous energy when he asks, âIs she here?â
Sirius grins, looking uncharacteristically cat-like. âUhâ yeah,â he says, like itâs obvious. His stupid grin only grows and James thinks heâd quite like to punch his teeth out. âShe came with Lily. Moons thought we should invite her. Sheâs a lovely girl, isnât she?â
James knows heâs teasing but canât quite bring himself to care â the prospect of seeing you has demolished all other feelings of pathetic-ness. He leaps off the couch and makes his way to the kitchen, guessing thatâs where youâll be, a barely touched drink in his hand and Siriusâ teasing following him all the way. Heâs so busy fixing his shirt before he sees you that he doesnât see you. He walks right into you on the threshold of the kitchen.
âJames!â You gasp, stopping short.
Jamesâ drink, to his horror, has spilt all down your front. His glass, previously full, is now half empty, the rest of it splattered all over your white top.
You barely have time to be surprised before heâs apologising.
âShit,â he curses, mind blanking. His hands go to fix the damage before he realises he probably shouldnât touch your chest, where his drink is now seeping into your top and showing no signs of stopping. He pulls his hands back lamely. âShit, Iâm so sorry, Y/N. Oh gosh. Iâm so dumb, Iââ
Your rush to forgive him is almost as quick as his apology. âNo!â You shake your head and itâs awfully cute despite the situation. âNo, itâs okay, James. I shouldâve been watching where I was going.â
James grimaces. He tries not to look at the dark red stain that looks like blood on your white blouse. It is quite possibly the worst thing he couldâve spilt on you.
âItâs okay,â you say again, softer, reassuring, probably clocking the pathetic look on his face.
âDonât, angel,â James says, shaking his head. âSâmy fault.â He grabs your elbow gently and starts to pull you out to the living room, seeking Remus, who he knows will have a spare t-shirt thatâs at least clean. âCâmon, Iâll find you something else to wear.â
âWait, James. Wait.â You plant your feet in the doorway of the kitchen and James stops walking. He looks back at you, feeling guilty, hopeless, confused, and a bit endeared by you still, all at once.
âWhat?â He asks as gently as he can when heâs feeling like such a loser.
âI donât wanna cause any trouble,â you say, biting down on your bottom lip so hard James is sure it hurts. Youâre shy, he remembers. Quiet and polite. You probably donât like people making a fuss over you, even though you should really. Youâre pretty enough that people should be making a fuss over you all the time. âI think Iâll just go home, sâonly a ten minute walk. I was going to leave soon, anyway.â
James frowns. âI canât let you do that,â he says, shaking his head. He also canât let you feel uncomfortable. He conjures a compromise. âLook, how about you wait here while I go ask Remus for a spare shirt? And then Iâll walk you home to make it up to you.â
He knows walking you home isnât near enough to make up for ruining your top. But itâs the best he can do right now.
âBut you just got here, didnât you?â you say, frowning yourself.
James shrugs. Thatâs hardly a problem for him. âDonât worry. I see those two asshats every day of my life, sweetheart.â
You still look unsure but James isnât changing his mind. Heâs going to walk you home if itâs the last thing he does. But first, something for you to change into. He leaves you in the kitchen and finds Remus, whom he asks for a shirt, to which Remus says, âWhatâs that for?â too loudly.
James explains what happened dejectedly. Heâs not exactly surprised when Sirius laughs at him for it.
Itâs a quiet walk to your place. You live close, which is both good and bad. Good because it means every time James is at Remus and Siriusâs, heâll know youâre only ten minutes away. Bad ⌠well, for the same reason.
James tries his best to fill the silence with easy conversation. Itâs not hard, especially when youâre so sweet and kind and answer his questions so pleasantly. Youâre easy to talk to. You donât laugh at him when he slips on his words. You donât make him wait for answers. You ask him questions, too, timid as you are about it.
James finds he enjoys your company even more than he was expecting. Youâre like a breath of fresh air. Youâve got the radiance of an early spring morning and the softness to go with it.
Itâs safe to say heâs disappointed when you come to a stop in front of your place.
âThis is me,â you say, fishing your keys out of your purse. Youâre in one of Remusâ band tees and James thinks you look much better than Remus does in it. As much as he loves Remus. He realises heâs staring too late, his eyes following you as you walk up your front steps.
You unlock your door and then look back at him, timid.
âDid you want to come in?â You ask, sweet in your shyness.
James would very much like to come in. He also thinks he might fall on his face if he spends much more time with you. Heâs already dizzy on his feet and heâs been with you all of fifteen minutes.
âNo, no, thatâs okay,â he says as kindly as he can. âI should probably get back, or Siriusâll have my head.â At least he knows where you live now. In a totally not creepy way.
He steps forward to take your wrist in his hand, his thumb pressing into your pulse point. He can feel your heartbeat. Itâs not quite as fast as his feels but pretty close.
âIâm really really sorry about your top,â he tells you. He spreads his fingers over your forearm, your skin warm as late summer under his touch. âCan I do anything to make up for it? Buy you a new one?â
He wasnât joking, but you giggle, your face lighting up, your eyes crinkling at the corners. James feels something akin to a mad swarm of butterflies in his ribcage.
âNo, James,â you laugh, breathless and lilting. Your free hand lands on his forearm and his skin burns under your touch. âItâs okay, really.â
âOkay,â James breathes. His head spins as you squeeze his arm. Your skin is impossibly soft. You smell so nice. âBut, seriously, let me know if thereâs anything I can do. It was such a nice top, it looked lovely on you.â
You flush like James knew you would. Heâs slowly discovering he likes making you flustered more than heâll admit.
âThanks, James,â you say, and James imagines if he touched your face youâd be burning. âBut, really, itâs okay. Iâll see you around?â
âYeah. See you around, angel.â
Itâs only after you close the door and James is at the bottom of the steps that he realises he shouldâve asked for your number. He really is as hopeless as Sirius says.
-
James Potter is on your mind most of the time. You canât help it. Youâre not above admitting you have a crush on him. You are above admitting how big said crush is.
Heâs really one of the sweetest people youâve ever met. Sure, you donât meet a lot of people. But youâre sure if you did heâd still be one of the best. Heâs kind, heâs funny, heâs unbelievably charming. Heâs a bit awkward sometimes and you like that, it makes you feel better about your own social ineptitude.
It also helps that heâs very very handsome. You would look at him all day if you could. Heâs all dark, velvety skin, inky curls that youâve imagined weaving your fingers through more times than you can count. Deep brown eyes turned bright with his ever-present smile. Thick eyelashes, a lovely sloping nose, a quirk to his mouth that you think you could get drunk on. He dresses well, too, though youâre sure heâd look just as good in a hoodie and sweatpants. Or nothing at all. Youâd squashed that thought before it could go any further.
You donât even mind that he spilled wine all over your nicest top. Sure, the stain is never gonna come out. Itâs sitting in your closet, ruined. Embarrassing as it is, you smile every time you see it. James had made up for it tenfold anyway, walking you home and telling you he was sorry about a hundred times. It would be hard to not forgive him.
âY/N?â
Thereâs a call of your name from the office door. Youâre in here on your lunch break, not really eating more than you are thinking about James. Margaret, the older lady who owns Harrietâs but only comes in Thursdays and Tuesdays, is poking her head through the door.
âHi, dear,â she says. âSorry to disturb you, but thereâs a customer out here asking for you? I can tell him to come back later, if youâd like, but he seems quite insistent.â
He. Of course, your mind flies straight to James. Which is ridiculous, you know, but it was already parked and idle at James, anyway.
âHeâs asking for me?â You ask, perplexed. You donât usually get personally requested by customers. And if it is James, youâre sure heâd ask for Lily instead.
âYes, dear,â Margaret smiles, and she looks amused.
You get up because itâs your job, not because youâre hoping like hell itâs James. You put down your barely-eaten sandwich, brush past Margaret with a small âthank youâ and emerge into the shop.
There, standing at the counter, is James Potter.
âY/N!â He says as soon as you emerge. Heâs bouncy. Frazzled. You would even say excited. âHi, lovely. Iâm really sorry to barge in on you like this, were you on your break?â
âOh, um, no. It just ended,â you lie. You still had a good ten minutes left. Not that youâre gonna tell him that.
Jamesâ smile makes the lie worth it. âPerfect. âCos I need your help.â
You think you physically perk up. Like a cat when it smells food is near. You hope he doesnât notice.
âOkay,â you smile. Youâre happy to help if itâs James youâre helping. âWith that?â
James explains that he needs a bouquet, your best work, better than a boring one you can get at the grocery store because he really really needs this person heâs giving it to to like it. Your smile fades at this. At the fact that heâs getting flowers for someone else. He wonât tell you who this someone else is. He also wonât tell you why heâs giving it to them. Youâre sorry to assume itâs a girl he likes. Possibly Lily? Maybe thatâs why he asked for you and not her. You wouldnât be surprised, theyâre close and sheâs gorgeous.
Of course, you help him anyway. You recommend flowers that last the longest, colours that go together, which ones smell the best. Heâs asks you what your favourites are and ends up going with those, saying he trusts your judgment.
You have to admit itâs all very endearing. And you have so much fun helping him that by the time he leaves, arms full of a huge bouquet made up of all your picks of flowers, youâre beaming. Despite the daunting fact that heâs walking out of your shop with a bouquet for someone else.
Margaret appears once heâs gone. Sheâs got this big smile on her face that you canât quite make sense of.
âHeâs a handsome one,â she muses. âIs he your boyfriend?â
Your cheeks go redder than the roses on the shelf behind you.
Much later, youâre in the comfort of your small home, a bowl of steaming hot mac and cheese in your lap while the TV drones on. Itâs some sort of romantic comedy that you canât say youâre very interested in. Despite the lead male being very attractive. Youâre about to change programmes when thereâs a knock on your door.
You start. Nobody ever comes over. You donât have many friends, and the ones that you do have, you tend to go over to their places, rather than the other way around. Youâre so busy worrying about who it is that you havenât even stood up before thereâs another knock.
You get up off the couch, mac and cheese forgotten on the coffee table. You give your outfit a once over. Youâre in sleep shorts and a hoodie thatâs too big for you. Not your best work, but itâll have to do. You fix your hair with little to no care and then open the door.
Itâs James. You gape. You definitely shouldâve paid more attention to your hair.
âJames,â you say.
He beams right back, seemingly unaware of your sleepy appearance. âHi, sweetheart.â
You stare at him. He looks pretty as ever. Itâs only just going on sunset, and the colourful sky casts streaks of orange and golden yellow over his pretty face. The last bits of sun tangle themselves into his curls and drown themselves in his eyes. Heâs dressed casual, but he still manages to pull it off, like youâd thought. A hoodie and jeans, a pair of beat up converse. Heâs hiding something behind his back and you think you hear cellophane crinkle when he moves.
âIâm sorry I didnât call,â heâs saying. He doesnât have your number. But Lily does. Is it crazy to think heâs maybe asked her for it? âIs this a bad time?â
His kindness reminds you how to speak. âUhâ um, no. Sânot a bad time, I just wasnât expecting anyone. Are youâ um, did you want to come in?â
Youâre rambling, you know. He hasnât even told you why heâs here and youâre asking him to come in.
James smiles kindly and it makes it all better. Heâs good at that. At making you feel okay for being a bit of an awkward loser (your own words, not his, of course.)
âIâd love to come in,â he says, all smiles. âBut first, I have something for you.â He pulls whatever heâs been hiding out from behind his back and offers it to you between your chest and his. âTo say Iâm sorry about your top.â
You blink. Itâs a bouquet. Itâs the bouquet. The one youâd helped him put together. The one that has all your favourite flowers and colours and smells because despite you thinking it was for someone else, youâd still wanted the best for James. You blink again.
âJames,â you say, a little breathless, a lot speechless. âTheyâre for me?â
James laughs and you feel dizzy for a moment. Heâs got a really nice laugh. âFâcourse there for you, sweetheart. Who else?â
He makes you take them from him, one of his hands guiding yours around the stalks. His skin is warm and sets yours on fire. Youâre surprised the bouquet doesnât go up in flames when you take it from him.
âI-I donât know,â you stutter. âI thought âŚâ you donât finish your sentence. Youâd thought they were for some other girl whoâd caught his eye. You change tactics mid sentence, âTheyâre lovely, James.â
âI know they are, dove. You picked âem out.â
You giggle then. Heâs the sweetest boy on the planet, you decide. He let you pick out your own flowers, and you didnât even know it. Youâve never properly been given flowers before, despite working at a floristâs. Itâs a new feeling. Like a star burning in your chest that doesnât seem to want to go out. It hovers in you ribcage and stays there, buzzing madly.
âThank you,â you say, lifting your eyes to his. You find heâs already gazing right back at you. Thereâs a rogue curl falling over his forehead that youâd love to push out of the way. âReally. I love them.â
James flashes you a boyish grin. âGood, âcos if you didnât, Iâd have to have a word with the girl who chose them.â
Youâre still beaming when he comes inside. He follows you into the kitchen, where you find a vase for the flowers. You set about taking them out of their packaging, cutting the stalks and putting them gently in the glass vase filled with water.
James watches you and you can tell heâs trying to be nonchalant about it all, about being in your space, but his eyes scan your kitchen like itâs a map heâs trying to figure out. Your mismatched mugs on the counter. Your magnets and Polaroids and receipts on the fridge. Your overgrown plants on the windowsill.
You carry your flowers to your small living room and put them in the dead center of your coffee table. The bouquet is so big it would block most of your view of the TV if you sat on the couch. You hardly care. Youâd rather look at them than the TV, anyway.
Setting the flowers down, you spot your half eaten mac and cheese and hope James doesnât take you for a slob. Youâre lucky he didnât catch you on a Friday night. Youâd be drowning in ice cream, probably.
âAre you hungry?â You ask him, half hoping heâll say no, because who in their right mind asks their crush if they want macaroni and cheese? Itâs so lame, but you canât take it back now. âI have mac and cheese, but thatâs about it, sorry.â
You cringe and wish youâd held your tongue, but James beams.
âIâd love some mac nâ cheese,â he says. âUnless itâs boxed, that shit tastes like cardboard.â
You get him some mac and cheese, glad you made it yourself, gladder you havenât resorted to boxed food just yet. The two of you sit in the kitchen on your tall kitchen stools under your golden lights and eat. James is easier to be around than anyone youâve ever met. He makes you feel special but not to the point where itâs too overwhelming. Heâs kind and heâs golden, he acts like youâre the only person he ever wants to talk to.
Watching him eat in your home is more of a pleasure for you than youâd like to admit. He compliments your cooking. He says he likes the bowl heâs got, which is a white one with pink flowers all over it that you bought at a market ages ago. He gets a string of cheese dangling from his lip and makes a dorky face trying to get it into his mouth without using his fingers. You think youâd like to kiss him. His lips all puckered and eyes crossed as he attempts to scoop the cheese into his waiting mouth.
Youâre so busy laughing at him that you donât notice your own bowl balancing precariously on the edge of the counter. When you go back to take another spoonful, your hand knocks the bowl and it goes tumbling. Right into your lap.
âShit,â you curse, gasping when a dollop of hot pasta lands half on your thigh and half on your shorts. The sauce spreads like wildfire over the fabric of your sleep shorts. Why do things keep spilling on your clothes when James is around? Itâs becoming a theme. Your horror grows when the bowl clatters to the floor and while it doesnât smash, it spills mac & cheese everywhere. âOh, shit, thatâs embarrassing. Um.â
You bend to clean up your mess but James beats you to it.
âHere, let me,â he says. He slides off his chair and is quick to start scooping up the ruined pasta.
âSorry,â you stutter, standing helplessly as James cleans up your mess for you.
âDonât be,â James shrugs and looks up at you, his cheeks dimpling as he smiles kindly. âGo change, Iâll sort this out.â
You feel an overwhelming rush of gratitude and affection for him that makes you want to kiss him stupid. You donât. Instead you go down to your room and find something to change into. Seeing as heâs already seen you in your sleep shorts, you suppose your checkered flannel pyjama pants arenât really much worse. Nothing can be more embarrassing than whatâs just happened, you decide.
By the time youâve changed (plus spent a lot of extra time staring at yourself in the mirror, practicing your smile), James has cleaned up the spill and is washing your bowls in the sink. You decide then and there that you like him a lot more than youâd initially thought.
You emerge into the kitchen on light footing. You feel like a magnet being drawn to him like this. Itâs bizzare, how much you want to be around him, no matter how shy he makes you. Itâs something youâve never experienced before. A rip in the ocean calling your name. You know of the danger but you donât really care. You ignore the signs because heâs James and you donât think he has a mean bone in his body. The warning signs basically donât exist.
âThank you, James,â you say, standing on the threshold of the kitchen.
James flashes you a big smile, up to his arms in soap and suds, scrubbing away at a bowl. He looks like a house husband. Itâs almost more than your heart can take. âThatâs okay. Hey, nice pyjamas. Yâlook good.â
You can tell by his tone heâs not teasing. Heâs being genuine, which is somehow worse than if heâd been teasing. Your smile is so big it hurts.
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James is gonna kiss you tonight. Heâs sure of it.
So far, all of his advances have gone well. Perfect, even. Unless you count the drink-spilling incident, but if it hadnât been for that heâd probably never have found the courage to get you alone again.
Heâs taken you out to lunch once. Heâs been into your work twice, not including the first time. Heâs invited you to his rugby game tonight, to which youâd said yes more enthusiastically than heâd expected. Itâs not exactly a date, per say. But heâd wanted to see you today and he had a game and his coach would blow his head off if heâd missed it for a girl. No matter how lovely said girl is.
Heâs waxed poetic about you to Sirius and Remus more times than he can count. Heâs yet to kiss you. Sirius thinks this is beyond absurd.
âSo you havenât even kissed her yet?â He asks, incredulous. Heâs in his rugby kit, hair up in braids, chugging a Gatorade though the game hasnât even started yet. âWhatâs the hold up, mate?â
James groans. Sirius is yet to understand that some people donât like to jump into the deep end before theyâre ready. âI donât want to scare her off,â he explains, straightening up from where heâd been tying his laces.
âOh yeah, youâre reaaally scary, Prongsie,â Sirius drawls, dripping in sarcasm. He rolls his eyes and then clasps Jamesâ shoulder. Heâs surprisingly and uncharacteristically genuine when he says, âLook, I think she likes you enough that kissing her wonât scare her off.â
James blinks and looks up at his friend. âYou think she likes me?â
Sirius makes a face. âAre you kidding? What other girl would want to watch you eat shit in a field with a dozen other sweaty guys?â
And heâs back, James thinks. Trust Sirius to be a sweetheart one second and as asshole the next.
Soon enough James is out on the field and he wants to say his mind is on the game and not you but heâd be lying.
For the first five minutes heâs distracted trying to spot you in the stands. Then the next ten minutes are spent trying not to stare at you. Youâre with Remus, whom James is hoping isnât relaying anything heâs ever said to him about you.
You look as though, to Jamesâ extreme delight, that youâve dressed up for this. In a pretty dress and a jacket that borders on being so big on you it swallows you up. Sure, youâd still looked pretty drop-dead in your pyjamas the other night. But this is another level of gorgeous.
The first chance he gets he bounds over to you, ignoring his coaches instructions to âstay with the teamâ. Most of the team has scattered for half time, anyway. James makes a beeline for you.
âYou came!â He shouts as soon as youâre in shouting distance.
You grin and wave at him, brilliant and dazzling and so damn pretty in the early evening sun. Youâre not far up the stadium and James is grateful he doesnât have to climb too many steps â though heâd definitely climb all the way to the top row to see you if he had to.
âHi, James,â you say, looking happy as a clam to see him.
James beams back. He wonders vaguely if he looks as lovesick as heâs feeling. He canât even bring himself to care if he does. Heâs lucky Remus is nowhere to be seen â probably loving on Sirius somewhere.
âHi, angel,â James says, smiling around his words, which come out all sticky-sounding and fond. âIâm so glad you came.â
You beam and rock on your heels, looking one part shy and two parts delighted, your hands clasped in front of you like youâre not sure what to do now.
âCan I give you a hug?â James asks. âIâm so happy to see you, I might explode if you say no.â
Heâs joking, of course. Or maybe not so much. You nod, a tad vehement, James notices smugly.
âYes, please,â you say, breathless.
James steps into your space, heartbeat a mile a minute. You smell like flowers again. Lavender, he thinks. He definitely doesnât smell anywhere near as good. âYouâre sure Iâm not too sweaty and gross?â
You shrug. âI donât care, James.â
âYou should. You look lovely.â
You make a noise that sounds half pained and half pleased and it makes Jamesâ heart skyrocket.
âCan you just hug me?â You ask, a hint of desperation in your tone thatâs actually much more than a hint but James is trying to be a gentleman. âPlease?â
James thinks if you keep this up (by this, he means, acting as though maybe you like him as much as he likes you), heâll die on the spot. He hugs you. For his own and your sake. Wraps you up in a big strong hug thatâs so passionate he accidentally lifts you off the ground slightly. You donât seem to mind. Your arms weave around his neck like they were meant to and you hook your chin over his shoulder and go all melty.
James almost moans. He canât believe how perfectly you fit in his arms. How your body melds into his so nicely. Heâs big and firm and loud and youâre quiet and small in your own way. But it works, and James is so glad it does.
âHow was work, lovely?â He says into your hair. Your hair, which smells like coconut and something sweeter.
âIt was okay.â Your voice is quiet but you sound just as pleased as he does to be wrapped in each otherâs arms. âLily says good luck.â
âHey!â This is Sirius, jogging towards the stands and the, for want of a better word, lovefest. âWhy donât I ever get hugs like that?â
James releases you but keeps a good hold on your waist, twisting to meet Sirius. âWhat? You want one too, Pads?â
He lets go of you and holds his arms out for a hug, half joking but also half serious.
âNot from you!â Sirius scoffs, backing away from James like his hug will give him an incurable disease. âFrom your pretty cheerleader over there.â
Sirius plants his hands in his hips and nods his head towards you where youâre standing behind James. James doesnât need to look to know Sirius has probably made you embarrassed.
âShe doesnât want to hug you,â he says dryly, in an attempt to save you from his obnoxious friend. âWhereâs your boyfriend? You can hug him instead.â
Sirius scowls but it doesnât last long. You brush past James and it takes him a second to realise whatâs happening.
âIâll hug you, Sirius,â youâre saying sweetly. âCâmere.â
And to everyoneâs surprise, you hug Sirius. James finds it both endearing and highly annoying. Annoying because Sirius is smirking at him over your shoulder, his hands on your lower back. Endearing because itâs apparent youâre trying to make friends with Jamesâ friends and he couldnât be happier. The hug doesnât last quite as long as yours and his, though. And Sirius doesnât quite lift you off the ground like James did.
James watches, reluctantly fond, as Sirius pulls away and smiles at you all kind and un-Sirius-like.
âThank you, mâlovely,â he says, swooping down to kiss your cheek. James shouldnât feel jealous, because Sirius kisses everyone on the cheek, but he does anyway.
His jealousy quickly fades when you practically skip back over to him, all smiles.
âSorry about him,â James says quickly. Heâs very used to apologising for his friends.
âNo, thatâs okay,â you shake your head and then take Jamesâ forearm in your hand unthinkingly. Heat licks all up Jamesâ arm.
âY/N,â he says, sounding more confident than he feels. âDo youâ?â
The shriek of his coachâs whistle cuts him off. Time to get back on the field, it says. James groans, long suffering, throwing his head back like heâs been resigned to the worst fate in the world. You giggle and it makes it all better.
Jamesâ team loses the game. Itâs embarrassing and then itâs not, because you bound up to him afterwards and give him a hug even better than the one at half time, gushing about how good he was, telling him it doesnât matter that he lost because he played amazing, anyway.
He sure feels like a winner as he walks with you to the parking lot, his duffel bag swept to his wrong side so he can walk as close to you as possible.
âI didnât know you were so good.â Youâre still gushing and James thinks heâs never blushed more in his life. âI mean, not that I didnât expect it. You just never told me.â
âYeah, well, Iâm not Sirius,â James murmurs, feeling overly feverish.
âWhat? Whatâs that mean?â
James gestures vaguely with his hands. âI donât go around bragging, is what it means. And Iâm not that good. Weâre just a local team, babe.â
Itâs your turn to flush. Head to foot you go all shy. He thinks itâs the pet name that did it. And maybe the fact that heâs pointed out your gushing.
âRight,â you say to your shoes. âWell, I think you should play for the country, is all Iâm saying.â
James laughs, delighted and a bit startled at your joking, but mostly just sick as a dog in love with you. âReally? Wow, you should tell my coach that, sweetheart. I think heâd totally agree.â
You pick up on his sarcasm and burst into giggles that make Jamesâ chest want to explode. He realizes youâve almost reached his car and puts his plan into action.
âHey, did you drive here?â He asks.
You look up at him and James thinks he sees an inkling of hope in your pretty eyes. âNo, I caught the bus. Why?â
âDid you want to go get Slurpees with me? I saw a 7/11 near your place the other night.â Then, because he really wants you to say yes, âIâm paying.â
Maybe itâs Jamesâ wishful thinking but heâs pretty sure you light up like a Christmas tree. He really thinks if you keep doing things like this his head is gonna get too big for his body. You beam, looking like an angel on earth in the last fragments of sunlight, skin painted in an array of bleeding golds and pinks and oranges.
âYeah, okay,â you nod. âExcept you donât have to pay for me, James, I have my card.â
James shakes his head, grinning as he fishes his keys from his bag. âNah, donât worry. Pretty girls get slurpees for free.â
Heâs ninety-eight percent sure you freeze up like a block of ice as he unlocks his car. He has the generosity to not mention it.
The drive to the 7/11 closest to your place is quiet. But good quiet. James puts on the radio and is delighted when you start humming along like heâs not even there, your fingers tapping along the window where youâve rolled it down, the wind brushing over your pretty face. He canât quite get enough of you. Even just driving in silence with you feels like cloud nine. Heâs enamored. Totally lovelorn. Heâs surprised he can even drive straight.
When you get there he parks the car and then tells you to wait so he can open your door for you. He holds your hand to guide you into the 7/11. It feels like walking on air.
You both greet the guy at the cashier, you much more shyly, but James is learning youâre nothing if not polite. Itâs practically empty inside, which James is glad for. How is he supposed to kiss you if thereâs a bunch of strangers around? He leads you over to the slurpee machine with the excitement of a kid in a candy store.
âWhat flavour do you feel like?â He asks, grabbing a cup for you.
âUm,â you lick your lips and James wonders, not for the first time, how it would be to kiss them. âGrape, I think.â
âGrape?â He wrinkles his nose in pretense. âIâm more of a cherry guy, but Iâll let it slide âcos I like you.â
You giggle and flush, to James' extreme delight. He lets go of your hand to fill your cup for you, all the way to the top. He pops on a lid and a straw and passes it to you, cold condensation dripping over his fingers like raindrops.
âThank you,â you say softly, taking the cup from him, your fingers soft as they brush his.
James gives you a big smile in place of a youâre welcome, then preoccupies himself with filling his own cup. He can feel your eyes on him all the while. Practically burning holes into the side of his face. His face, which feels like itâs on fire. He finishes filling his cup and shoves a lid on.
âHave I got something on my face?â He asks without looking at you, definitely teasing but he thinks you can take it.
You groan and punch him in the arm. Punch isnât really the right word. Itâs more of a brush of your knuckles. James hardly feels a thing. âJames.â
James laughs, delighted at your reaction. âWhat?â He chuckles, picking a straw and turning to look at you. âYou wereââ
But youâre gone, turning into the candy section just in time for James to see the back of your jacket disappear. He follows you, grinning like mad.
âY/N,â he says, sing-song.
âJames,â you copy, with half the enthusiasm but twice the sweetness. He can almost hear you rolling your eyes.
James canât help it, he snags your jacket in his fingers and pulls. You squeal as he twists you to face him, his hand coming to hook around your waist. Your slurpees get crushed in between your chests. James can feel the coldness of his soaking into his shirt but he hardly cares. Youâre so close he could kiss you. Heâd like to. Itâs what heâs been trying to do all evening.
Youâre gasping, breathless from the closeness and his sudden attack. âJames,â you say again, panting. âWhat are you doing?â
James shrugs. âNuthinâ. Did you want some candy?â
You swallow and adjust your grip on your cup where itâs pressed to his chest. Youâre staring at his lips. Heâs staring at yours, too.
âNo,â you say, your pretty eyes flickering from his eyes to his mouth and back again. âI donât want candy.â
James licks his lips, partly because he thinks heâs about to kiss you, but mostly to tease you. âThen what do you want?â
Your eyes follow the slow movement of his tongue. âUm.â
âDo you want me to kiss you?â He asks, softer now. Less taunting. More sincere.
You stare at him. âWeâre in the middle of a 7/11, James,â you chastise. But you donât turn him down.
âSo? Thereâs no one in here but us.â
He inches closer. His slurpee is probably spilling over with how much heâs squashing it but he canât bring himself to check. Heâs too transfixed by you, the hopeful look on your pretty features, eyes blown wide, lips slightly parted.
âOkay,â you breathe, hardly a word at all.
âOkay, what?â James says back, just as quiet. âI can kiss you?â
âYes,â you nod once. Your hand ghosts over Jamesâ elbow and he hopes youâll grab it when he does finally kiss you. âPlease.â
It doesnât take much more convincing than that. He kisses you, and the very first thing he thinks is that heâs bitten off more than he can chew. Thrown himself in the deep end, chum for the sharks. Because itâs glorious. Itâs better than he ever imagined, better than anything he couldâve conjured up in his mind. You taste like grape slurpee, sugary and sweet. Youâre tentative like you always are, but it doesnât mean you hold back. You let him kiss you as hard as he pleases, tilting your head up to meet him, gripping his elbow with your free hand like you never want to let go.
He kisses you firm but careful, passionate so you know how much he likes you but soft enough so you know heâs okay to go slow if you need to.
Soon enough the moment is ruined â James shouldnât have expected anything less. The guy at the cashier is wondering aloud if James is planning on ever paying for the Slurpees now dripping condensation into both of your clothes and hands.
James sighs and goes to pull out his wallet, but not before pressing another kiss to your smiling mouth.
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