@feydarling : " You Do Not Trick The Ones You Love. "

@feydarling : " you do not trick the ones you love. "

metal soaks tongue, blood smeared across palms. her words sting more than the bullet wound, leaving him longing for the peace that his heavy eyelids promise. she was never meant to find out this way. not now, not after last night. he was naive to think they'd have longer than just a morning of bliss, should have known: happiness is a fleeting thing in this life.

" feyre — " her name comes out in a shaky breath, mustering what's left of his energy to sit up. an action he quickly regrets. any reasoning is halted with a sharp inhale, head tilting back against the wall. he breathes through the pain, before his neck rolls to look at her. gaze filled with such panic, widened & all too alert. " how did you find out? "

everything is put on pause. the clashing of metal drowned out, the smell of ash & blood fading, the adrenaline of battle coming to a calm — all as he takes her in. her scent, the feeling of her body pressed against his. it was everything he needed to confirm that she was alive, she's okay. yet he can't hold her close enough, can't let go, can't yet forget the dread of the unthinkable that overcame him just moments ago.

fingers trace shapes onto her back as she speaks, tucking the crown of her head under his chin, knowing exactly where her mind had gone during that hour of silence. just the same as his. & yet she fought through it, a battlefield that would send experienced fighters running the other way, just to get back to him. ( he wonders what he must have done for the cauldron to bring her to someone like him, how it must have been some mistake that he wouldn't dare argue against. ) " i almost feel bad for anyone who tried to get in your way. my savior. " a kiss is pressed to her hair, voice steadying into a quiet purr, a desperate attempt to bringing her some comfort.

but whatever moment of peace, of calm, disappears with the idea of them returning back to the fight. when he had nothing to lose, he welcomed death with open arms. fought until there were only bodies laying at his feet, until there was no one left. but this was not that battle — no, this was just a distraction for hybern, an attempt to scatter their men & sparse their numbers. he's made his peace with the outcome of this war, already willing to sacrifice everything in the end when it comes to. but this was just the beginning.

he leans back to take her face in his hands, head shaking. " feyre. if we went back out there like this, we would be of no use. we would just be distractions. " he omits the part where he can't lose her, not when he just got her back. " cassian and azriel have this under control, they've faced much worse. " the red & blue syphons blasting across the field give him all the assurance that he needs. " our best course of action right now is finding the healer. "

he was covered in blood, splattered across his face and chest — where his ended and others’ began, i couldn’t be sure. his torn illyrian leathers revealed a deep gash in his side, that he barely seemed to notice. anyone else would have been curled over from the wound, but my mate was strong. strong and alive. the panic in his eyes told me i didn’t look much better — hair matted with blood and mud, under eyes dark and heavy, fingers scabbed over from the rapid fire use of my bowstring, and shoulder gaping with the tip of a faebane laced ash arrow still lodged inside. my palms rested first on his neck, then gripped his shoulders, as his mere presence steadied me. reassured me that we were both still okay.

“ they knew we were coming — what we were looking for. it was a trap, ” shaking my head frantically, heart still pounding, my words came out in panted fragments. “ i could only hold my shields up for so long — and then one of their arrows broke through once i slipped. faebane. ” i bit back a wince as i suddenly became aware of the pain, recalling the sheer number of hybern soldiers coming our way. “ and then your wave of darkness across the field just disappeared. i thought something terrible had happened. ” my face paled as i remembered the utter dread that plagued me. “ so i ran. i knew you needed me. ” just as i needed him.

i thought i had lost him — i could finally admit it now that i knew i hadn’t. he was alive. still standing, as the heart i called mine continued beating. the short hour where i thought he had been taken from me was the worst of my life and felt like an eternity, as i stood on the precipice of oblivion, forced to consider the rest of my immortal life without him — if it ever came to that, i didn’t want it. i knew for certain there was nothing i wouldn’t give up for him. as i pressed my forehead against his, there was nothing i wanted more than to stay in his arms forever.

but we couldn’t — not until all of this was over and hybern’s invasion was fully thwarted. neither of us could sleep until we knew the people we loved were safe. that shared responsibility weighed us both down, our shoulders curled in towards each other with quiet, resigned desperation. there was only one option while our people continued to fall on the battlefield. “ we have to go back. ”

any lingering pain is long forgotten the moment he lays eyes on her, a flicker of hope igniting by the sheer fact she isn't already telling him to fuck off. he wants to continue, a desperate desire to beg, plead for feyre to love him as he loves her — all consuming, a fire set ablaze the moment they met. pride be damned. instead stilled with a beating heart, his chest raising & falling with each panicked breath, each second of silence weighing heavy between them as he awaits the inevitable.

relief hits him like a stack of bricks, knocking the wind right out of him, dizzying as she speaks. i don't want you to leave. for so long, he'd convinced himself that she would never feel the same, that he didn't deserve her even if she did. to hear those words, to see her look at him like this: like he's not something to run from ... he's grateful for the chair, sitting in it before his knees decide to buckle underneath him. " then what do you want, feyre? " he hesitates asking this time, a flicker of desperation burning into his gaze that can't quite meet hers. hopeful, for an answer that doesn't sting this time, for all of the confusion to finally end. he swallows, a brow quirking as he finally looks at her. " you would cook for me? do you even know how? "

@rhysie : “Say you do not care for me. Tell me you feel nothing and I will walk away.”

his eyes held mine, looking right through me with desperate determination. the same eyes that had haunted me from the moment we met — the same eyes i was too scared to paint, afraid once i started i wouldn’t be able to stop, lost in deep swirls of mysterious violet. i wasn’t the one who had been shot, but i didn’t know how i was still standing, how i could even breathe without falling to my knees. any anger or hurt — any desire to hate him had dissipated the second i opened the door and saw him there, gritting his teeth through the pain. i thought i didn’t want him to chase after me, but i knew that was only an excuse so i wouldn’t have to face the truth.

he’d saved me, in more ways than one — long before i even knew. he’d been there through it all — the night we lost everything, he was a victim of hybern and amarantha just as much as i was, perhaps even more so. he understood what i had endured more than anyone and he knew i was drowning before anyone else had, pulling me from the fire, ensuring i wouldn’t succumb to the darkness i had been so eager to bury myself beneath. he’d never walked away even when i had given him plenty of reason to. and i couldn’t let him now. not after everything. not when i couldn’t imagine another second of this life without him. “ i can’t. ” something in me settled, a deep resigned relief as i finally admitted what i must have always known. “ i can’t tell you that, because it would be a terrible lie and you would read right through it. i don’t want you to leave. ” i pulled out a chair. “ you should sit. you must be starving. ”

when i stumbled across your blog after reading some feyre’s reply, and then yours i literally was sucked in. i admire your rhys so much, the way you grasp his every details & your not afraid to go over all the bad bits part of him and that is just so important!! i read his voice when i see your dialogue.. chef kiss.

what about my portrayal attracted you to my blog?

AHHH .. this is the nicest compliment ever 🥺 thank you so much!! i've been enjoying seeing your lucien on my dash and i'm so excited to eventually write together!!

❝ 𝘩𝑒 𝑤𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑛𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟 𝑘𝑛𝑜𝑤 𝑤𝘩𝑎𝑡 𝑖𝑡 𝑖𝑠 𝑡𝑜 𝑙𝑜𝑜𝑘 𝑢𝑝 𝑎𝑡 𝑡𝘩𝑒 𝑛𝑖𝑔𝘩𝑡 𝑠𝑘𝑦 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑤𝑖𝑠𝘩 . . . ❞

⁰¹. carrd ⋆ ⁰². prompts ⋆ ⁰³. sideblog

@feydarling : i want all of you. every piece of you.

a day to devoted just to each other, a moment to live in ignorant bliss. there are no thoughts of what still lies ahead of them, their impending doom, how they may be torn apart before they’ve even begun. he only has time to think of her, how lucky he is for every minute he has with her — how if this is how he were to spend his final days, he would be grateful. every second of longing, of wishing, has lead him to this night. ( it has all been worth it. )

it ends in a starlit room, limbs tangled in ebony sheets, with a half empty bottle of wine. rhysand’s fingertips counting each beat of feyre’s heart, his chin tucked upon the crown of her head. to be wanted, to be loved … after showing her each side of him, even the worst ones. the ones that are casted in the shadows, that would send anyone else running. she sees it all, and does not falter. he hardly notices the lump in his throat, as he sits up to hover over her, lips pressed to her cheek. “ i'm all yours. ” a string of kisses trail down feyre’s throat, stopping at her collarbone. “ my heart, my soul … they are yours to keep. ”