#14 You Horny?

#14 You Horny?

Dear Journal, 

So George left to get back to work, bummer, but I told him that when I get hungry later I would def give him a ring to order some more 'room service'... His absence gave me just enough time to figure out who the manager of this hotel was. Apparently his name was Stan, and he supposedly sent me the invitation, so I took a trip down to his office. In the basement. The particularly dimly lit basement, lit only by glow of several walkway torches. Hmm, dangerous. 

I get to this huge wooden door labeled "Stan", and boy did I give that wood a knockin'. And once Stan finally opened the door I could tell that soon I'd be knockin' on some more 'wood' shortly. 

Damn was that a sexy-ass manager! Also he had no clothes on, which was wicked-sweet because his body looked better than cheesecake tastes! And cheesecake is fucking delicious. 

"Wassup, Rick." He said rhetorically

"You know 'What's Up', why'd you send me this invitation, Stan?" I asked, in a non-serious way because his sexy body was distracting me. 

"Heh, well first-off my name's not Stan, it's SATAN. They keep forgetting to put that last 'A' in my name for Christ's sake. Secondly, I brought you here because I need to ask something of you." he said

"Hmm, I don't know, you ARE Satan and-all.." I remarked. "What could I do for you that you can't do yourself anyway? Don't you have like, superpowers or some shit like that? And where are your horns?!" I said

"I need you to collect the souls of evil people for me by fucking their brains out. Literally. I can't do it myself, and if I could, I'd have already done it." He said.

"Well, what's in it for me... Besides the gay sex, that is.", I said

"Fulfill the prophecy and I will bring your 'Jack' back to life."

"I'll need a minute to think about it." I said, tempted.

"Very well, then why don't you come relax on my bed for a while." He said, sultrily

I'm never one to pass up a good roll around in a big bed... Even with a sexy demon man. 

As soon as I got on the bed he put me in the doggy position and squeezed that big cock up my tight asshole. 

"So, Rick, Mmm, what do you think about my offer?" He said

"Fuck yeah, I'll do anything you want me to, just fuck me harder!" I yelled

"Very Well" He replied

After a couple more minutes of impaling my tight hole with that big cock he shot a huge load of warm semen all across my back. Damn 

He told me to stay right there and not to move, and I didn't know why until i felt him bend over and lick his cum off my back. At least this way he didn't have to fuck up some baby wipes. Those lil hoes are expensive. 

"Stan' told me to come back to his office later that evening to come talk more about this proposition. So after a quick siesta and a shower I decided to come back down to the basement. Who the hell knows what I got myself into now...

Sincerely, 

Rick

p.s. Hell yeah

I like to hangout with people that make me forget to look at my phone

Yes

I'm loving it

a fake customer service account went around and said what service employees really want to say to stupid customers

#4 Sauna Situation

Dear Journal,

That new gym I had recently became a member of was quickly becoming the best place ever. The only thing wrong with it was that the steam room was closed for reconstruction. Everyday I checked to see if it was finally finished-- and for a while I was always disappointed-- but one day, it was finally open for business. In preparation for taking the steam room's virginity I had the most intense workout session ever! I was blasting my quads, ripping my abs and flexing my biceps so hard that morning that I hadn't noticed this one guy following me around all day. He was deeply entranced by my workout regiment.

He was apparently really into me and it's not like I would've minded anyway. He was a tall, muscular Hispanic man with wavy black hair and green accents. Unbeknownst to me, he followed me into the newly opened steam room after i finished my work out. I sat down to melt away in the steam and that's when I saw him. He walked in and closed the door behind him. He then began to suggestively adjust his towel in front of me-- even opening it so that I could clearly see flashes of his dick. Seeing his cock, noticing his half-chub, was enough to confirm my belief that he wanted me right here right now.

He sat down next to me and began whispering close into my ear naughty, seductive things about what he wanted to do to me. At some points he would switch between english and spanish. I won't lie, I thought that was hot. He leaned in to kiss me and I pushed forward, accepting his advances.

I trailed down his body with my hand, making it to his towel. I rubbed over his crotch, noticing an immense dick begging to be released. I'm a rather generous person, so it'd behoove me not to lend my special form of assistance...

I knelt down in front of this big man, and unwrapped his package from his towel. He sure was happy to see me because I was immediately greeted by the most beautiful uncut cock I'd ever seen! It had a perfect shape, it was fat and heavy, and it was leaking with precum. I started munching on his bone like I was starving-- and he was loving every second! He couldn't stop moaning. He gripped my hair and pushed me down further and further on his shaft. He stopped moaning long enough to tell me that he was about to blow. I stopped sucking long enough to tell him to go for it; cum in my mouth. He wasted no time in shooting thick glob after glob of that hot, salty baby elixer down my mouth. I swallowed every drop that made it inside.

He'd gave me all of his... Now he insisted that I return the favor. You know me, I'm a giver. The rest is history...

Until next time.

Sincerely,

p.s.

Seriously, is this the best gym ever or what!?

Welcoming the new neighbor