I Just Realized @randomingoftherandomness That Weishan's Golden Embroidery On Her White Robes Is A Stole

I just realized @randomingoftherandomness that Weishan's golden embroidery on her white robes is a stole to designate her as a gold-tier candidate. The other gold candidate also has a similarly embellished stole. I don't read Chinese so I'm not sure what the tablet says but maybe those flowers are ones that have some meaning like "victory" or "chosen one"?

Once chosen, she is predominantly dressed in black with gold and red accents and designs. @romchat said that it is to tie and complement the wardrobe colouring on Ziyu’s clothes, and I agree.

And the few times Weishan and Ziyu don't match are either when his trust in her wavers OR he knows she's deliberating whether or not to leave (like when she gives him the saber hilt named after them). So it makes sense that during her final showdown with Huanyu, she's dressed in that lilac number as a confirmation of her desire to stay with him.

(Side Note: I love how the first scene above is one of the few times we see similarities in the cut and color of Ziyu and Shangjue's costumes because they both smell bullshit from our Wufeng assassins. And this tentative agreement is reinforced by the fact that they're standing in the background together because they're rarely positioned next to each other, on the same plane, facing the same direction, etc.)

Also, Director Guo is really going for broke emphasizing the tragedy by mirroring these two back-to-back scenes with Ziyu/Weishan and Shangjue/Qian, no? From the costuming to the actor blocking to the composition:

Other costume observations: One of my pet theories about the show is its symbolic use of bare skin. Throughout MJTY, we see the vulnerability and honesty of "baring it all" paired with the characters lying:

Weishan in the bride hostel pretending to be ill with a rash and then showing her naked back to distract the guards

Yuanzhi slipping Qian false intel about Shangjue while she is treating wounds on his naked back

Huanyu lying about his imprisonment while showing his naked back

And one of my favorite editing moments of the show is in Episode 6 when Shangjue gently chides Yuanzhi about allowing Qian to get the better of him after stealing his poison pouch. He warns Yuanzhi, "There is someone from Wufeng still hiding in the Gong residence" and then the show cuts to Weishan dressing. Ha.

And speaking of baring it all, the bath scene between Qian and Shangjue: Qian came underdressed and ready to seduce Shangjue with all that creamy healed skin, but when he confronts her with his own “nakedness” (of his body, desire, post-coital personality) she actually opens up about her past and motivations once they become clothed again. It’s their most direct conversation up until that point in the series and she’s bashfully gripping her robes closed because of it. It’s much harder to trade her nakedness.

(Side Note: It still tickles me that one night with Young Master Jue got Qian rethinking her whole revenge plot. He dickmatized her that good.)

The original meta thread between @romchat and I was getting a little too long so I thought I would take the initiative to start a new one 😌

So here are my thoughts about the light colours in Yun Weishan’s wardrobe as per that original thread. I won’t be talking about all the wardrobe choices, just the ones that stood out to me.

We start off by seeing her start her journey into the Gong family in red. That’s the colour that she carries with her into The Valley and that’s how Ziyu sees her for the first time. Not much to say here, just establishing her as a bride candidate.

Then we see her as she is living in the hostel. She’s dressed in white. To signify purity? A crossroad of choices? What’s fascinating is the embroidery there. I can’t make out what it is, but I’m sure it was an intentional and deliberate choice. This show doesn’t do accidents, I feel.

Once chosen, she is predominantly dressed in black with gold and red accents and designs. @romchat said that it is to tie and complement the wardrobe colouring on Ziyu’s clothes, and I agree.

I like that the red is just a cut of colour on her. Not dominant in her colour palette but just there. Enough to remind you that she is meant to be here to marry into the family (red) but it is hidden under subterfuge (black).

Then we also get this one. I love how the red bled through a lot more in the fight between her and Jin Fan. An indication of her shifting loyalties? A wavering of the foundation?

From the looks of it, this one had a bit of purple injected into it. Subtle enough that in certain lighting it still looks black, but upon closer inspection, you can see the way it flashes.

Then we come to this scene. Her and Ziyu were like two peas in a pod and I think it is in this scene that they’re the most complementary in colour palettes to each other. I deeply adore the golden stitching of clouds on her clothes. Don’t you think they look a little like clouds at a sunrise?

Then we come to this number. A lilac shade. Following the theme of a sunrise perhaps? @romchat had pointed out that between this and the mint number she wore when getting poisoned by the trickbox given by Lady Wuji, these are the two “lighter” colour shades we see on her.

Fascinating when you think it’s definitely standing out from the rest of the darker & heavier draped characters.

Rom said that it perhaps symbolises her acceptance of her freedom and her place by Ziyu’s side. I’d like to also agree on this point and add that it is possibly her way of coming out of the night (divorce with Wu Feng) and firmly settling into the new era of her life.

Also, can we just also appreciate how different Esther Yu is on this show? I’ve only ever seen her in very happy, bright, and sunny roles, which kinda befits how she portrays herself in her public persona. It’ll be interesting to see what other type of roles she could possibly grow into in the future.

This is the funniest damn thing:

Source

"But I'm not clothes" killed me. The break in Yuanzhi's voice. Really hammered home for me just how young he is and the way we relate to loss and grief at that age. When we're young, we assume our feelings of grief shrink as time goes on, but oftentimes they remain the same; all we can do is cultivate and expand the love, joy, etc. that surrounds that grief so it doesn't dominate our everyday lives as much.

When he was a kid and Shangjue gave him Lang's knife, Yuanzhi immediately wanted to give him a gift in return but Shangjue reminded him he had already been given the best gift (another brother). Shangjue has a very deep capacity for love that can coexist with his grief, and I have hopes that Yuanzhi will see that as he gets older.

And I think that's plausible given the visual language of Qian's flowers.

When Qian and Yuanzhi talk together once last time, Yuanzhi bitterly plucks a flower that hasn't bloomed.

Qian: "The flowers haven't bloomed yet. Why did you pluck them off?" Yuanzhi: "Because only flowers that haven't bloomed will be remembered forever...In Shangjue's heart, we who are alive can never compare to the dead Lang."

And yet the flowers eventually bloom.

(Side Note: Gah, Ryan Cheng's acting is so good in this scene, with that mixture of pain, yearning, and peaceful resignation crossing his face.)

Of course, we can compare Qian to a flower that never bloomed because she left and therefore she will be remembered forever like Lang, but I think given Shangjue's costume (a spring-like green) and overall lighter demeanor with Ziyu and Zishang, this is also a moment of blooming for all the relationships in his life, including Yuanzhi's.

Basically, I want six seasons and a movie from Director Guo so I can put on my tin foil hat and just analyze the shit out of the visuals lol @randomingoftherandomness

My Journey to You Ep. 13 visuals: Lanterns of fate

"Be it manmade or natural fate, I want all these fates." -Thirsty Sister

No matter how many times I see them, I always love a good lantern festival scene. And when those scenes use said lanterns as a visual motif to represent the significance of Fate in our characters' relationships? Yes, please.

Sigh, such lovely framing. And I'm glad to see Jolin Jin get an opportunity to exercise those dramatic chops.

Gong Zishang's rumination about Fate really encapsulates so many of our characters' current relationships, no? Both Yun Weishan/Gong Ziyu and Gong Yuanzhi/Gong Shangjue collided into each others' lives because of nefarious, political machinations, not natural Fate.

Weishan was planted in the Gong residence by Wufeng to destabilize the clan's stronghold in the martial arts world. And yet Fate is a funny thing. Weishan probably never imagined the Sword Wielder to embody the type of soft life she has always desired but never deemed herself worthy of so it almost seems like Fate that two individuals who desire the same thing would find each other and fall in love despite living in such a cutthroat world. Ultimately, she decides to challenge the fate dictated to her by Wufeng by deciding to save Ziyu, thereby permanently changing the course of their lives (and the plot of the show).

It's also revealed in today's episode that Shangjue and Yuanzhi first met soon after Shangjue's mother and brother were assassinated by Wufeng (starting to see a pattern) and Yuanzhi's own parents had died. Through their mutual grief, they formed a strong bond, although it seems for most of their relationship Shangjue hasn't always been able to fully reciprocate Yuanzhi's open devotion and warmth despite caring for him deeply.

But seeing his cousin near death seems to have shifted Shangjue's perception of their relationship. As he cradles the new lantern Yuanzhi made to represent their relationship (independent and distinct from the one Shangjue shared with his younger brother), it finally seems like he's accepted their Fate as an inseparable found family despite the terrible circumstances that had brought them together.

Chinese-style horror in cdramas

The Importance of Amae in My Personal Weatherman

Masterlist || Language Analysis Part 1

I have seen a lot of discourse in the English-speaking fandom surrounding Segasaki's apparent dismissal or trivializing of Yoh's desire to pursue his manga, and most of it is negative. His comments about wanting Yoh to remain dependent on him, or that Yoh does not need to earn money are seen as patronizing or controlling at best and oppressive at worst. It appears that Segasaki does not understand nor respect Yoh's need for independence, and that is what strains their relationship.

But what if I asked you to consider that Segasaki's behaviour is actually an invitation to Yoh to reinforce their relationship? And what if I told you that Yoh's withdrawal from Segasaki constitutes a rejection of that invitation, and it is that rejection that strains their relationship instead?

Of course, the end result is the same - a strained relationship - and in reality there is never one side wholly responsible for this. The point of this is to simply challenge the cultural notion that a successful relationship is the coming together of two equally independent individuals, as opposed to the co-creation of a relationship formed by two interdependent individuals.

"If only you could stay drunk forever..." "It's okay to feel down again for me too you know" - Segasaki, Ep 4, Ep 5

This isn't about Segasaki wanting to keep Yoh is helpless and dependent on him, but about wanting Yoh to be able to be true to his feelings and express his own desire for affection honestly, without having to hide behind "I hate you" or rejection.

Or, let's try and talk about how Segasaki and Yoh reinforce their relationship through the use of amae (featuring a brief mention of tatemae/honne) who am I kidding this is not brief at all

First: Cultural Context

The way people conceptualize and make meaning of the Self differs between Western and East Asian cultures, and this plays into the differences we see in the basis for our self-esteem, the personal attributes that we value, and even what constitutes the behavior of a mature individual. Broadly speaking, Western cultures tend towards the Independent Self Construal (whereby the Self is a distinct entity separate from others) whereas East Asian cultures tend towards Interdependent Self-Construal (whereby the Self is connected to and defined by relationships with others). Thus, in the West, expressing one's individuality is very important for one's self-esteem, and being able to communicate clearly and confidently is valued and a sign of maturity. Conversely, in the East, one's ability to integrate and become a member of the group is prized, and contributes significantly to one's self esteem. In order to be seen as a mature individual, one must learn not only to read a social situation but also how to modify one's behavior in order to respond to the changing demands of that situation, with the ultimate goal being to maintain group harmony.

tl;dr - In East Asian culture, behaviors and attitudes that emphasize interdependence and promote group harmony actually play a big role in reinforcing relationships and one's membership towards the group.

Segasaki is an expert at this - his "public mode" that Yoh refers to actually shows us how good he is at social interactions. This is the Japanese concept of tatemae/honne (crudely translated as public self/private feelings) - which I could link to a bunch of articles for you, but I'm going to suggest you check out this 9 min street interview instead. At 6:41, one of the interviewees comments that another is sunao, or "honest" (we'll cover this later too) and at 6:49 specifically talks about how reading situations is important as an adult. Segasaki reads the room well, but most importantly, he reads Yoh well.

Yoh is not good at this, at all. In Ep 6, we see that he does not integrate well with the group, and he doesn't realize how he might appear to others when he stares and sketches from afar. Yoh does not read the room well because he doesn't pick up on social cues and does not adhere to social norms (I'll point these out in Ep 6's corrections). He cannot read Segasaki, and especially cannot read Segasaki's amae, or his attempts at reinforcing their relationship. Part of this is because his low self-esteem causes him to withdraw from Segasaki's affection as a means of self-protection, and so he valiantly tries to deny his feelings for Segasaki. As Man-san commented in Ep 4, Yoh is not sunao - he has difficulty with being true/honest about his feelings, even to himself.

Sunao is another term that usually pops up when talking about feelings/relationships. It can be used to describe one's relationship with oneself, as well as the relationship with another/group. With oneself, it is usually used to mean "being honest/truthful/straightforward/frank/open-minded about one's feelings". With another person/group, it is usually used to mean "to cooperate/listen/be obedient, or "to be humble/open-minded". In essence, the word encompasses an ideal virtue that is often taught from early childhood - that we should treat both ourselves and others with humility and honesty, because that is how we accept ourselves and stay in harmony with other. This is what becoming an adult, or gaining maturity, means (not gaining independence, as adulthood is often equated to in the West - do you see a running theme here 😂). Of course, that's actually really hard to do, so you'll often hear children (and immature adults too) chided for "not being sunao" (this can therefore sound patronizing if you're not careful). We'll revisit this in a little bit.

Second: What is Amae?

Amae is a key component in Japanese relationships, both intimate and non-intimate. It happens every day, in a variety of different interactions, between a variety of different people. But it is often seen as strange or weird, and those unfamiliar with the concept can feel uncomfortable with it. This stems from the difference in self-construal - because independence is tied so strongly to an individual's self-image in the West, it is very hard to fathom why behavior that emphasizes interdependence could be looked upon favorably. It is telling that every possible English translation of the word "amae" carries a negative connotation, when in Japanese it can be both negative or positive. The original subtitles translated it as "clingy", for example. Other common translations include "dependence", "to act like a child/infant", "to act helpless", "to act spoiled", "coquettish", "seeking indulgence", "being naive" etc.

From A Multifaceted View of the Concept of Amae: Reconsidering the Indigenous Japanese Concept of Relatedness by Kazuko Y Behrens

*Note - the word "presumed" or "presumption" or "expectation" or "assumption" used in the above definition and in the rest of this post, can give the impression that all of amae is premeditated, which adds a calculative component to this concept. Whilst amae can indeed be used in a manipulative manner (benign or otherwise), it is not the case for every single situation, and often amae that seeks affection is often spontaneous and without thought, precisely because the situation allows for it to appear organically. This is the amae that Segasaki and Yoh most often exchange - so think of these assumptions and expectations as "unconscious/subconscious" thought processes.

Third: Amae Between Segasaki and Yoh

Yoh shows a lot of amae when he is drunk:

He whines, buries himself into Segasaki's embrace, refuses to move or let go of him, and keeps repeating "no". In these interactions, Yoh wants Segasaki's affection, but instead of asking, he does, well, this, and he presumes that Segasaki will indulge his behavior. Leaving to get some fresh air might not be as obvious - but it is a form of amae as well, because Man-san is his guest, not Segasaki's, and he shouldn't be leaving Segasaki to entertain her. The expectation that this is okay, and that neither of them will fault him for it, is what makes it amae.

Segasaki obviously enjoys indulging Yoh when Yoh does amae, because he recognises this as Yoh's request for affection from him. It's not that Segasaki enjoys Yoh in this drunk, helpless state; it's not even that Segasaki feels reassured by Yoh's requests for affection. Segasaki knows Yoh likes him, and recognizes that Yoh is struggling with those feelings. That Yoh is actually able to do amae to Segasaki is what delights him the most, because it is something that requires a lot of trust in Segasaki and a willingness to be vulnerable in front of him. This is how amae reinforces relationships - when a request for amae is granted, both the giver and the receiver experience pleasant feelings.

That said, an amae request can also be perceived negatively - if amae is excessive, or if the person responding feels they are obligated to do so. In Ep 5, Man-san chides Yoh for his amae - the fact that he expected to do well from the beginning, and became upset when he failed. He told her about his unemployment, presuming that she would comfort him, but alas.

Segasaki also does amae - but unfortunately Yoh misses many of his cues, and so neither of them really gain pleasant feelings from the interaction (ok so maybe Segasaki does, but I will argue that is more because Segasaki also enjoys it when Yoh obeys him - see @lutawolf's posts for the D/s perspective on this!).

Did you catch it? Segasaki wants Yoh to pass him the Soy Sauce, which, clearly, he is capable of getting himself. He tells Yoh to feed him, because he wants Yoh's affection. And the real kicker - he asked for curry, and expected Yoh to know he wanted pork. In all these interactions, Segasaki presumes that Yoh will indulge him and do for him things he can do himself perfectly well (and even better at that) - this is what makes this amae. But look at Yoh's reactions:

Yoh just stares between the Soy Sauce and Segasaki, between Segasaki and his food, and then just at Segasaki himself. He doesn't recognise any of this as amae, and in the case of feeding Segasaki makes the conclusion that this is somehow a new slave duty he's acquired. And therefore, he does not gain pleasant feelings from it.

In Ep 3 we see a turning point in Yoh's behaviour - his first (sober) attempt at amae (the argument in Ep 2 is debatable - it's not amae from Yoh's POV, but Segasaki responds as if it were, with a head pat and a "when you get drunk, you talk a lot don't you?").

Here, Yoh wants to express his desire for Segasaki's affection, but he can't bring himself to say it aloud. Instead, he dumps bedsheets on Segasaki's lap, as if the bigger the scene he makes the greater the intensity of his desire he can convey. It is the presumption that Segasaki will understand him that makes this amae. And then, we get this:

Not only a happy Segasaki and a sweetly shy Yoh, but also a Yoh who's emboldened by Segasaki's response, and who finally, for the first time, reciprocates touch, and considers the possibility that Segasaki might actually like him.

With every episode, Yoh gets more and more comfortable with doing amae towards Segasaki, because Segasaki picks up on his cues and always responds to them. In Ep 5, Yoh's amae comes out naturally, triggered by the stress of his unemployment, and we see it in all those moments he sounds and acts like a child, and as I mentioned, Segasaki spends the whole episode reassuring Yoh that his amae is welcomed, and that Segasaki likes responding to it. If you've been wondering why the relationship between Segasaki and Yoh can, at times, feel somewhat parental in nature - this is it. It's because Segasaki sees the contradiction between Yoh's childlike insistence that he does not like Segasaki and his desire for Segasaki's attention and affection, for what it really is - Yoh's struggle with accepting himself. When Yoh is able to be sunao, he does amae naturally, and Segasaki responds to him in kind.

Now, all we need is for Yoh to recognize when Segasaki does amae, which will likely happen soon, given that Yoh has grown with every episode.

As always, thank you for reading :))