I Really Do Adore The Kind Of Character Who Would Rather Make Everything Worse Than Even Try To Fix The

I really do adore the kind of character who would rather make everything worse than even try to fix the problem. Yeah man, fuck communicating with your friends, blow the place to hell!!!

This weeks' Moby Dick:

Chapter 2: Ishmael pontificates on his shoes, barges into a black church in the middle of a sermon and goes 'well I'm not the weird one here I'm white' and finds a crummy old inn

Chapter 3: Ishmael proves himself as an irresistible target for trolling to innkeepers. Continues to pontificate in ways that makes you wonder why more people aren't punching him. There is possibly the most convoluted slow burn instance of There Was Only One Bed I've ever seen

Queequeg: henceforth we are married

Ishmael: bosom friends :)

Queequeg giving Ishmael half of his money: married

Ishmael: oh— married married

I need to make a little introduction post I still have not done that

“I turned in, and never slept better in my life”

“Therefore you must not, in every case at least, take the higgledy-piggledy whale statements, however authentic, in these extracts, for veritable gospel cetology.”

This should be printed on Moby Dick right under the title