Balls

balls

‧͙*̩̩͙❆ anything you wanna be

ˋ°•*⁀➷ hi first bsd fic,, just soukoku pining for you cuz friends to lovers <3

ˋ°•*⁀➷ osamu dazai, nakahara chuuya (separate) x gn! reader

°˖➴ listening to: marvelous - wallows

₊˚ alcohol, ambiguous relationship, friends to lovers, more fluff than should be allowed tbh

all you had to do was say you wanted him and he’d be yours in a heartbeat, but it would never be that easy. it would be in a perfect world, but realistically, the words would just get caught in your throat every time you tried to force them out. dazai wasn’t stupid, he knew of your feelings for him even before you did. to say the man was confusing would be a gross understatement, he’s impossible to read. it’s frustrating really, the fact that nights like this one are the only times he exposes even a sliver of his true feelings.

stumbling and tripping in the cool sand on the beach, his hand in yours as he lead you to the water. the sun had long set, leaving an inky black sky in its wake and stars reflected in the calm, salty water. the sand was easy to trip on, showcased almost too perfectly when you fell into dazai. he flipped around instantly to catch you, splashing into the shallow waves with you in his arms.

you doubted he’d ever look this beautiful, sand in his hair and sticking to his cheek, a genuine smile on his face as he held you in the cool water, not caring if either of your clothes got wet in the process. worst case scenario, he’d lend you one of his t-shirts to wear, then he gets the pleasure of seeing you in his clothes! the kiss shared under the moonlight with the softest and smallest of waves crashing over your bodies would be one you’d remember forever, even if he was just a friend. he knew you loved him and he loved you, but it wasn’t really official.

your best friend wasn’t a very affectionate person at heart, at least not until relatively recently. his cold exterior lent to a much more intimidating image of him, the reality just being a five-foot-two man with too much anger in his short body. it took him a long time to open up to you, so many nights spent drunk and panicking over a slip of the tongue that you likely wouldn’t remember come morning. using his gravity manipulation to mess with you was part of day to day life, making you float just above the ground to watch you flail helplessly trying to regain your balance.

he’s your best friend, nothing more. why, then, did you find your heart beating so fast whenever he was around? was it the way he always found a way to get you into trouble, subsequently getting the adrenaline pumping through your veins, or did you have feelings for him?

surely that wouldn’t all come to a head when he was standing on the ceiling in front of you while you remained on the ground, teasing him for using his ability to make himself seem taller. surely. it was a spur of the moment thing, he swore to himself up and down to keep from acknowledging his growing feelings for you. not like he could deny much when his lips met yours, still upside down. it was strange, but not an unwelcome first kiss.

© santsukii on tumblr. translation and reposting without permission is prohibited. 

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