My Soul-mateless Yoongi Heart. He's Too Soft For Me, Everything I Pictured For Him. Literally Right Here

My soul-mateless Yoongi heart. He's too soft for me, everything I pictured for him. Literally right here

we live for main character yoongi

Awwwwwwweee 🥺🥺 thank you so much!

No ones bought me flowers in YEARS 😭

Have an amazing day!! 💜

I can’t wait for oc to reject the bond offficially. Like I don’t think her soulmate bond with Jimin is worth keeping when her very own soulmate decides to destroy any connection they have by living his life haphazardly. Like oc deserves to be freed from all the pain. It was never her fault. It isn’t like she forced herself into the life of Jimin for them to be soulmates. I just want Jimin to experience the pain as well. He so deserves it. 😡

😌 anon

Hello my lovely 😌!

I have the same inner turmoil myself. It’s hard to keep Jimins perspective of things out of the story, but still keep in mind we he makes his choices.

Some insight will be shed for him! But the bonus POV’s will cover a lot more.

But our Mc is huge on people having a choice. A choice her brother and his soulmate never had and ultimately one people don’t get, they don’t decide if they have one or not. 🤷🏻‍♀️

I’m also thinking of taking requests for certain situations that people want to know his reactions and thoughts. So if you have any you’d want to see, feel free to let me know.

💜♾💜 ♾💜

Don't Tell Me What You See || 13

About Time

Warnings: ANGST

Pairing: Jimin!BTS x reader

Author's notes: It's about time we did some talking.

masterlist

“Tae!” Your voice laced with urgency rang across the phone.

“What’s wrong Firefly?!” Panic instantly rising in his.

“Something happened. I need you.” You replied nervously.

“Where are you?”

“Remember that club you and Yoongi found me in?” You question, keeping your voice an octave higher than usual.

“Yes, I’m on my way!” You can already hear him breathing heavily as his pace picks up.

“Quickly!” You beg before hanging up. A smirk plays on your lips as you place your phone back into your back pocket and turn around.

“You ready?” You ask the person in front of you, as you slide back into the booth.

“As I’ll ever be.” Mi Young sighs.

It had been a couple days since Jimin was with someone. You had time to digest exactly what happened, but something still nagged at you. But for now you had pushed it aside to focus on something you deemed even more important.

You contacted Mi Young the day after, instantly having a connection with your twinflames soulmate you knew you couldn’t wait for them to meet. She was a strong willed, dependable, caring individual who loved to shower her friends with affection. But of course she was not only beautiful on the outside, but also on the inside.

You two had talked non stop about setting this up. Mind you, you did manage to leave out the tiny detail that he is Kim Taehyung of BTS. Something you could use as an inside joke later on.

So tonight, here you were with Mi Young and the rest of your group at the club she works at. A couple of dancers from HYBE, another producer and 3 PA’s. Thankfully all who she had warmed up to, but not recognized.

While she sits next to you in a dark booth in the back, her leg is constantly bouncing. You scan the front entrance for your twinflame, feeling his emotions rising. Low and behold he bolts into the club with Yoongi in tow.

“Here we go.” You smile at Mi Young, giving her a smile and her thigh a squeeze before standing up from the booth.

Walking towards the open space you wave your arm over your head catching their attention. Both rushing over to you through the sea of people.

“Firefly, are you ok? What’s going on?” Taehyung pants, struggling to breathe again.

“I’m ok Tae, I have someone I need you to meet.” You smile at him, fluffy his hair and moving it out of his eyes.

“Who?” He asks worriedly, eyes widening at you.

You side step out of the way, winking at Yoongi as you turn.

“Taehyung, this-” You gesture to the girl that had followed you out of the booth and had hid behind you. “Is Mi Young. Mi Young this is my twinflame Taehyung.”

You gesture to him and take a step back to give them room, slightly bumping into Yoongi’s left side as you do.

You watch as the two soulmates make eye contact, light reflects in their eyes as they go through the soul journey together.

“You planned this.” Yoongi whispers into your ear, not a question but more of an understanding of your underhandedness. You giggle and grab his hand.

“C’mon.” Pulling him towards the booth, letting the two have their moment uninterrupted. Sliding back into the booth Yoongi now sitting next to you, you both order drinks from the waitress currently at the table.

5 minutes later you receive 2 messages. One from your twinflame and one from his soulmate.

‘We're going to go outside for a walk, to talk. Thank you Firefly. I love you.’ - Taehyung.

‘I’m going to kill you….but thank you!!!!’ - Mi Young.

Chuckling to yourself, you show Yoongi the texts you recieved, him also releasing a dark chuckle.

Comfortably you spent the rest of the night eating, and drinking with friends. Not letting yourself dwell on the decision you had to make.

💜♾💜♾💜

It has been 4 weeks since that night. You haven’t spent a day not thinking about what happened. Both Yoongi and Taehyungs words constantly haunt you, regardless if you were spending time with Jimin or not.

Jimin was working hard to respect the boundaries you had put in place, and you hadn’t felt pain since that night. To which you were unbelievably thankful for. But the need to know what happened that night was like an itch you couldn't scratch, just out of reach.

“Have you thought about what we said?” Taehyung asks, plopping down next to you happily on the couch. Yoongi flinging himself on the other side of you. You nod your head, paper tea cup still to your mouth. Texting Mi Young about your schedule for next week.

Tae had begged you to let his soulmate know what was truly going on. You had some reservations about it, but in the end you agreed to her knowing. So now, instead of two overly concerned individuals hounding you, you have 3. But at least you have a female to talk to about it. Well you would, if you could find it in you to voice, how bad things are for you.

Chugging the last of your tea you glance around the lounge. For any sight of the other members or anyone else that could possibly listen in on your conversation. Apart from you 3 there were only 4 other people, but they were across the room.

“I have.” You stated matter of factly, leaning back arms crossed over your chest. “But I think I need to understand a few things first before I make it final.”

You frown, down at your empty tea on the coffee table in front of you. You know they want to know exactly what was going through your mind, but you couldn’t explain it. Too much was whirling around, but also nothing at all. You need to know more.

“Are you guys done for today?” You ask, still refusing to look at them.

They share a quizzical look before Yoongi responds. “Yea, we finished early today.” You nod.

Noises from the hall indicate people are heading to the lounge. You don’t bother looking up when they enter, you know who they are. You abruptly stand, spooking both men next to you.

“Jimin!” You call out looking at your soulmate. “Do you want to go to that cafe we talked about last time? If you’re free.”

Your soulmate perks up, noticing you. “Yes! I’m free!”

“But hyung you said you’d go with me to-” Jungkook starts, but Jimin nudges him in the rib cage silencing him.

“Let’s go!” He sings walking over to you.

You smile at him before grabbing your stuff, waving over your shoulder to the dumbstruck boys you left on the couch. You walk out of the building with Jimin by your side.

The cafe you were heading to was only a couple blocks away, so you both opted to walk there. Once there, you both order drinks and a bakery good. Then head up to the second story of the shop to enjoy yourselves on the veranda.

You had been talking for a while now, both on your second mugs of coffee and tea. You don’t know how to bring it up. Friends or not you have to just ask.

“How was the party after the festival?” You ask, sipping on your tea. Trying to calm your nerves.

“It was good.” He replied sheepishly. Spooning another piece of sponge cake into his mouth.

“Tae told me, you left with someone?” You push, keeping your voice steady and as light as possible.

He places his spoon down on his plate and runs his hand through his hair, leaning back in his chair.

“Yea, I did.” He won’t make eye contact with you.

“Jimin, you’re allowed to live a little.” You force a chuckle, placing your drink back down. “We are friends aren’t we?”

“No, I know. It’s just-” He starts. Finally he looks at you, shame written on his face. You’re trying to force your body to relax. Hands wanting to ball into fists. Feet ready to run. But you hold your ground against your instincts and fake a soft smile.

“I did go with this girl, back to her hotel room.” He tries again, still the look of shame lingers in his eyes. “Everything was going great-....but - I couldn’t. I felt like I was hit with this nauseating feeling, like I was suffocating so I left.”

Now it was your turn to be dumbfounded. He must have noticed your confusion.

“One minute clothes were coming off and I was kissing her, then all I could hear was this deafening beat, and this feeling of..you know when you drink too much, but you’re still drinking more? Kind of like that. And I swear I could see spotlights when I closed my eyes. And then I was back in the room again with her, but when I touched her again….it felt like I couldn’t breathe, almost like I was drowning. I panicked and went back to the dorm.”

What kind of sick punishment was this? He only felt your bond when he was with someone else? Now you really wanted to laugh. You were passed crying, tears didn’t make you feel better. That explains why you hadn’t been in any pain since that night. Jimin was too shaken up about it to talk to anyone, therefore his usual retorts about having a soulmate remained in his thoughts only.

Your twinflame and Yoongi are right. You feel so close to being dead inside, you have to make a decision.

But what they didn’t know was that you already had.

Weeks ago you made your decision, when there wasn’t any pain. Being accustomed to the cold void you found yourself in. You had been able to think clearly, but you knew you couldn’t tell them. Not yet.

“Answer me honestly then,” You stare into his eyes, set in your choice, no matter his answer. “If you knew who your soulmate is, would you feel any different?”

There was a long pause, as he stared back at you. His face blank as he thought over your question.

“The stubborn part of me wants to say ‘no’, but to tell you the truth, I really don’t know.” He finally answers. “I guess I have a lot of issues trusting people. Even if they are my soulmate, I don’t think I could just instantly trust them.”

“It’s understandable if it makes you uncomfortable.” You reassure him.

“It’s not just being uncomfortable. I've had multiple friends, idol friends that have been used by their soulmates selfishness. I’m constantly worried about Jin and Namjoon and don’t even get me started on Tae, he was so eager to find his and now he has and he does look happy. But I’ve seen how selfish a soulmate can be, I’ve lost friends because of them. They aren’t themselves anymore, it's like they get completely lost until they’re just a shell of who they are.”

“It’s understandable to have fears.” You soothe. “Our past experiences shape us, they affect decisions we make now.”

He stares at you even more intently now, looking like he wants to say something else, you wait.

“I overheard Tae and Yoongi-hyung talking, your soul mirror is sick?” Well… that wasn’t what you were expecting.

“I guess you could say that, yeah.” You reach for your tea, nodding and taking a sip.

“Are you scared?” Jimin whispers. Definitely not where you thought this conversation was going to go.

“Not anymore.” You replied honestly. “The damage is done and there's nothing I can do about it.”

“If you could talk to your soulmate what would you say?” Jimin becomes highly focused on your next words. As if he is looking for his own answer.

“I’d probably ask them to reject our bond.” Looking down at your finger tapping on your mug. “Living everyday in pain is terrible. It’s better to rip it away than to watch it slowly being pulled apart.

“.....you wouldn’t do it yourself?”

Your breath comes out a little shakily, but you know what it is that you're subtly implying to him. It’s time to make that decision, and not just think about it.

“No. I believe people should be able to choose.” You look at him again. Unfaltering, steady. You’re ready. “To find their own version of happiness.”

You reach into your jacket pocket to reach something you have been carrying around since you made your decision weeks ago. At this point it was taunting you every time you remembered it was there. Leaning across the table you slide a business card from the clinic to him, the same clinic with the soul reader… the soul reader that just so happens to also be a Kosmos weaver.

“And that includes you Jimin. You need to do what will make you happy.” Decision made. “No one can force you into a bond you don’t want. Whatever you decide to do, I’ll support you. Because it’s your choice.”

Cry About It Later || Don’t Tell Me What You See

💜♾💜♾💜

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Don't Tell Me What You See || 11

Ok

Warnings: Angst, alcohol consumption

Pairing: Jimin!BTS x reader

Author's notes: ooooo, looky who we found.... I say as a distraction.

masterlist

You had ordered yourself a pizza and grabbed snacks on your way home, you mentally prepared yourself to see Jimin again on screen.

You had promised the boys to watch them at the live festival and you did. Cheering them on as if you were right there in the audience, as if they can see you.

You hadn’t seen them since Jimin released his MV, and you were kind of appreciative of the time apart. You didn’t have to struggle to work through the frost of being around him, hearing his sweet words laced with poison.

It had given you time away, you didn’t have to think about it. There was no pain those few days, no unbearable cold. Just a numb chill and you honestly didn’t mind anymore.

But just as you were cleaning up your living room from all the leftovers at around 11pm, the worst pain you had ever experienced racked through your body. The pain was unrelenting, stabbing ice, like you were being sliced apart. Bones shattering from freezing.

Falling to your knees a glacial wave of paralyzing agony rolls over you. You begin to choke as a scream attempts to escape your throat.

You can’t think straight. The stabbing, ripping feeling subsides slowly, but the cold….the cold is relentless, you feel like you’re drowning in it.

All you can think of is warmth. How to get warm. You don’t understand what’s happening to you, why is this happening to you. What is happening with your soulmate, is he ok?

Warm. warm. Warm. warm. Warm.

And then you see it, sitting on your kitchen counter, warmth.

You drag yourself over to the kitchen, pulling yourself up the barstool. Your legs still fighting against you. And you reach for it, the expensive bottle of whiskey Yoongi had brought over to your place. Cups are unnecessary, you pull the bottle to the floor with you, fling the lid off and bring the liquid to your lips.

💜♾💜♾💜

The music festival went off without a hitch. The boys performed well and received a lot of praise from their fellow peers.

Taehyung, Yoongi and Jin had come home soon after the event, the others stayed to socialize at the mini after party the tv company hosted.

Taehyung was currently seated on the couch flipping through channels, Yoongi had disappeared into his room and Jin was making a snack in the kitchen when the others arrived home.

Peering over the back of the couch as they came in to greet them he noticed one of them was missing.

“Hyung, where’s Jimin?” Confusion and concern laced in Taehyung's voice. “Did he not come back with you?”

“He went home with one of the girls from the venue.” Hoseok replies nonchalantly, walking past the couch towards his and Jimins room.

“He what?!” Taehyung jumps straight in his seat. Eye’s frantic, they meet Yoongi’s, who is making his way out of his room when he hears the others arrive.

“He was hitting it off with one of the girls that we met so he decided to go back to her hotel with her.” Namjoon shrugged, stealing a handful of popcorn Jin had made.

Taehyung and Yoongi exchange worried looks, terrified of what this meant for you.

“I really don’t understand why he does that, he knows he has a soulmate” Jin scoffs.

“Uh, Tae, remember that track you were helping me with? I just got a really good idea for it but I didn’t bring my equipment to the dorms.” Yoongi quickly remarks as he makes his presence known by walking fully into the living room. “You up for hitting the studio?”

“Yea, absolutely. Let’s go right now before you forget it.” Taehyung scrambles off of the couch and grabs his things.

They both give a goodnight over their shoulders as they head to the front door of their dorm. One slings his coat over his shoulders as the other puts his shoes on.

They have no idea what state they are going to find you in. Jimin going home with someone? They hope you were ok...ok? They hope you are alive. Sheer panic seeps through them both, hoping to get to you before they both lose their wits.

Once they were outside the dorm building, Taehyung finally spoke again.

“Please tell me we’re going to her.”

“We need to move quickly” Was all the older said.

💜♾💜♾💜

Tipping the bottle again, only this time no precious liquid graces your lips. You were feeling warm, still in pain. But not as debilitating as before. Being out of alcohol however was not an option. You needed more. Now.

Standing on shaky legs, you grab your phone and wallet. In your haze, you take your wallet back out of your pocket, pull out your bank card and slide it into your phone case. Throwing your wallet over your shoulder, you wobble to your door and put on some sneakers. Not even being able to think about a jacket or anything else, you leave your apartment.

You are too tipsy to rationalize what you are doing, all you know is that the alcohol made you warm. It was a fake warm, but it was a warmth you needed.

Trudging through the lobby, you can feel the frigid madness following you. It was so close, if you weren’t so drunk right now, you’d say it was pushing you out into the warm air. The warm air you can only wish to feel again.

💜♾💜♾💜

*BANG BANG BANG*

“Firefly! Are you in there?” Taehyung yells at your apartment door. “Please open up!”

Yoongi paces behind him, phone to his ear.

“She’s not picking up!” His voice is almost in full blown hysteria. “Just open the door!”

Listening to his elders command, Taehyung punches in your passcode. Both men burst through the door into your apartment, running rampant they search every room calling out your name. Yoongi notices the fallen pizza box, the thrown wallet and the empty whiskey bottle.

“Hyung, what are we going to do?!” Taehyung’s pacing now, hands constantly running through his hair.

“We’re going to find her Tae.” Yoongi reassures the younger….or maybe himself? He’s not sure. “We are going to find her.”

💜♾💜♾💜

Tripping over your own feet, you land on your hands and knees. Shuffling onto your butt, you take a look at the damage. There’s a rip in your jeans, but no blood.Compared to the overwhelming pain and chill from your soul mirror breaking, even without the alcohol, you don’t think it would be noticable.

Another wave of pain shoots through your body, forcing you back. You caught yourself, the pain was getting worse. You swear you can almost see your breath as it collides with the warm air.

You let out a pained chuckle. You need more alcohol. You’re not drunk enough, you need to feel numb, if physical warmth was all you are going to get, then you were going to take it.

Your eyes swim in a sea of dizziness. With trembling hands you pull out your phone from your back pocket. Forcing the bile climbing up your throat back down, you punch in the number you have etched in your heart.

You sit there on the steps, next to the river, staring up into the sky, waiting for the phone to connect. It barely rings once, before a panicked voice fights through your fog.

“Firefly!! Where are you?!” The desperation in his voice is evident.

He waits for your reply, but you are stuck in a memory from months ago.

“Do you remember that light festival we found while walking next to the river?” A hiccup escapes you.

“Of course I do Firefly.” He recalls. “Yoongi-hyung got so mad at you because you kept wandering away. He made you hold one of our hands for the rest of the night.”

A small laugh slips from your lips.

“It was prettier with the lights.”

“Firefly, are you-”

“I’m not OK.” You mumble feebly, cutting him off. Finally admitting to yourself as much as to him.

You lower your gaze down when you hear a group of girls walking past you and towards one of the opposite streets. They were wearing clubbing outfits for sure, skin and clothing splattered with glitter and paint. Your legs force you to stand, not wanting to think anymore you go to follow them.

You hear Taehyung talking, but you make no attempt at answering. You need to know where they're going. You watch them walk up to a bouncer at a club, talk to him and head in. You can hear the music through your deafened ears. You need to go in.

Finally you respond to Taehyung's frantic words.

“Tonight,” You breathe. “I’m going to have fun.”

You hang up the phone, unaware that he can hear the music and he’s connecting the dots.

Blinded to your surroundings you walk towards the door, attempting to pass the bouncer. He steps in front of you, blocking your way.

He mumbles something you don’t quite catch. You steady yourself, ready to fight your way in.

“I need to see your I.D ma’am.” He speaks again, you glare at him knowing full well you left that in the apartment.

“Look, there’s no way I look underage.” You huff, crossing your arms.

“All the same ma’am, I need to see your I.D to let you in.” He sighs sympathetically, attempting to usher you to the side.

In doing so you lose your footing...again, but this time arms catch you. You don’t bother looking up.

“Don’t worry, Joo Hwan. She’s with me.” A female voice replies.

“Oh, Mi young. I didn’t know you were coming in tonight.” He chirps politely.

“I’m not, just picking up a friend from inside.” The voice responds happily. You straighten up and look at the woman who saved you from the pavement.

All you can see is her side profile from this angle, but you can easily tell. She’s beautiful. Long, shiny dark hair tumbles down her shoulders. Slender frame, but still reaching around 5’ 5”. She’s more cute than sexy. She almost looks like she doesn’t belong here, but her stance and the air around her is telling you the opposite.

She leans back to grab your hand, pulling you with her into the club. You can’t help but stare at her. What is this feeling, this is something you’ve never felt before. She seems almost familiar, but you can’t put your finger on why.

She pulls you over towards the bar, her eyes searching for her friend. When she sees her, she begins to wave her arm, catching their attention. Then she turns around to you.

You make eye contact and the realization slams into you.

“Why is-” She gasps, hand covering her mouth she lets go of your hand.

“Twinflame.” Is all you say. This beautiful woman standing in front of you is your twinflames soulmate.

Her friend crashes into her from behind. Clinging and slurring, they whine about wanting to go home.

She shushes her friend and turns her attention back to you. You quickly pull out your phone and hand it to her. Without so much as a second thought, she takes your phone and adds her phone number.

“Y/N” You say taking your phone back.

“Mi Young.” She replies. Her friend nudges her towards the door to leave. Giving you a soft smile she makes her way out of the club.

Pain once again ripples through your body, this time worse. You brace yourself against the bar, it almost feels like you’re being ripped apart. The alcohol is wearing off, you need more. A lot more.

You manage to flag down one of the bartenders and order the strongest shot they had.

Muse || Cry About It Later

💜♾💜♾💜

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Don't Tell Me What You See || 15

Finally Warm

Warnings: I’M SORRY.

Pairing: Jimin!BTS x reader

Author's notes: Are we ready?

masterlist

“I just have to take a phone call.” You call out to the guys in the dorm living room.

Namjoon nods at you as they begin to open up the boxes of pizza. It was movie night tonight at the dorms. You had planned tonight specifically, Tae was currently picking up Mi Young. While the rest of the members, except one, were hankering down for the 3rd movie of the night.

You quietly escape their dorm apartment, shutting the door silently behind you.

“Hello?” You answer your phone, beginning to make your way up to the rooftop veranda.

“I can’t believe I’m doing this.” Jimin replies from the other end of the line.

“So you made it there ok?” You smile sadly.

“Yea, thankfully no one recognizes me.” He replies excitedly. “The Kosmos weaver says it should take about 45 minutes or so from start to finish.”

“You sound excited.” You comment. You open the door to the roof, using your shoulder.

“I am! I feel like I’m going to be free for the first time since getting my mark.” He sighs.

“I really am happy for you Jimin.” Your smile never falters.

‘We’ll both be free’ You think to yourself. You would make it through this. You promised Tae, Yoongi …. And yourself.

“They just called my name! I got to go.” He chirps. “But y/n, thank you. Your support in this means so much to me. I’m really glad we met.”

“I’ll always support you Jimin, you deserve to be happy.” Nothing could be more true than those words spoken.

“I’ll see you after this ok?” He asks.

“Yea.” You breathe deeply. “I’ll see you after.”

You hang up the phone and put it into the back pocket of your jeans, after placing it on silent. Leaning on the glass barrier that surrounds the veranda, your gaze falls on the sunset. If this was going to be the last sunset you were going to see, then you are going to enjoy it. Every last second of it.

Eventually you begin to feel a heat radiate from your right hip. Standing up, you lift your shirt slightly to see a crack along your skin, glowing golden. Another appears on your left arm, you smile to yourself. At Least it’s warm. No more worrying about the dull, painfully cold ache that has wrapped itself around your body like a cocoon. This was different, there was a strange comfort in this lull you found yourself slipping into.

You smile to yourself, as more golden cracks appear on your flesh. You welcome the heat they brought to your body. You think about the boys in the dorm below you, you think of Yoongi and Tae specifically. All that you had gone through with them. All that you had put them through.

You can feel the cracks snaking across your entire being, including your soul mirror. You close your eyes and breathe deep. Finally you can fully relax. Opening your eyes, you see the golden glittering dust float around you, almost like it's dancing in the wind. More and more flutter through the air and looking down you realize, it’s all coming from you.

You feel the thread bond thinning. You feel like you can finally speak. Finally say the words that this madness has been forbidding you to say. Constricting you, freezing you from being able to voice these words.

“Jimin, I’m your soulmate.”

The gold dust shoots higher into the air, reflecting the colours of the sunset before you. You extend your hand into the air above you, watching the cracks bursting with light forming on your limb. You can see gold swim in your iris’. All you feel is warmth, and weightlessness.

Then there is nothing but gold. You can no longer see anything but gold. You smile to yourself once again, before you feel your body fall.

You feel nothing as you hit the veranda.

Dont Tell Me What You See || ENDS??

💜♾💜♾💜

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