Me When The Queer Community Invents Another Binary (it's Progressive And Inclusive This Time Guys I Swear)

me when the queer community invents another binary (it's progressive and inclusive this time guys I swear) instead of just fuckin, I don't know, ditching these wack ass binaries that do nothing but segregate us into groups of 'most oppressed' and 'less oppressed so you should shut up'

Really hate that the queer community's response to the creation of a gender trinary (girl, boy, and nonbinary, which is still not all-encompassing) was to... reinvent the binary. We just started grouping all genders into "masc/male-aligned" and "fem/female-aligned" and it's so fucking stupid. Even with the occasional allowance of "neutral/unaligned" it still maintains the binary as the standard. And then they don't let you use certain labels if you don't have the "right" gender alignment. The fuck.

look at my monster/werewolf oc who has dark skin and is aggressive and basically a brute force but it's ok because they're gay and have a cute partner who's frail and has lighter/white skin and is essentially a Twink/hyper femme.

absolutely off the rails behavior when cis lesbians become enraged when you tell them that it's butchphobic to exclude butches who are transfemme, trans women, transmasc, men, take testosterone, have penises, and/or get top/bottom surgery from the butch and lesbian community. like the fact that we have historically always belonged to the lesbian community has been coming from the mouths of gnc and transfemme & transmasc butches for decades but everyone plugs their ears and doesn't listen.

the lesbian community has such a long and rich history of being a safe place for transfemme, trans women, transmasc, masc, intersex, genderqueer, non binary, and male presenting people who take testosterone and get top and bottom surgeries. before the rise of lesbian separatism and political lesbianism, transmascs & transfemme butches in lesbian spaces were not an issue. also in the past there just wasn't anywhere else for us to go. we were shoved into lesbian spaces by force, but also wanted to stay there because it's a community that's dear to our hearts and still means a lot to us

lesbians were the ones who made it safe for us to be there in the first place.

it's unfathomable to see people who say you should respect butches when it comes to their pronouns, identity, etc., to not invalidate their genders, to not assume anything about what gender they identify with- but the second they find out that some butches who are transfemme, trans women, or take T and still identify as lesbians and dykes they police our identities and bodies and insinuate that we can't be real butch lesbians for x, y and z reasons.

it's just insidious to exclude transfem butches and butch trans women on so many levels. i see this constantly and it's never called out as a form of butchphobia as well as a form of transmisogyny, especially when that person does not want to get bottom surgery. to call any MtF butch a man that's invading the lesbian community is to admit that one knows nothing about the complex gender identities and struggles transfemme butches and butch trans women face. to identify this way is one of the most prolific and powerful expressions of butchness, and what it means to be a butch lesbian. to deny these people the right to call themselves butch is inherently, inarguably butch and lesbophobic as well as trans/misogynistic.

to chase any of these people out of butch, lesbian, dyke and sapphic spaces is inherently butchphobia. yes, butchphobia affects perisex cis butch women, but it also affects so many more people. it affects transmascs and men. it affects genderqueer and non binary people. it affects bigender men. it affects transfemme lesbians and trans lesbian women. it affects trans girls and mtf lesbians in general. it affects intersex people. it affects lesboys. it affects boy/guydykes. it affects queer people of color. it affects studs.

it affects dykes, lesbians, and sapphics in general. this is a form of lesbophobia, trans/androphobia, intersexism, and especially butchphobia, no matter what. we have to accept ALL butches who don't fit into a neat little box of what a masculine queer person should be like.

LOL no it stands for 'man loving man'

always such a power move to use a flag you 'shouldn't' use, whether that be because the creator thinks your experiences are 'invalid', a group of bigots appropriated it, or people think it's cool to mock users of it. I adore the sunset lesbian flag, I adore the labrys flag, and I adore the 'toothpaste' mlm flag. These flags are symbolic of the beautiful experiences of queer people, and how we deserve to be heard, seen, and accepted. NOBODY gets to take that away from us.

'haha I just have a hormone deficiency' shut UP. If someone asks you why your voice is so high or whatever the fuck you tell them it's none of their fucking business. you are beyond disconnected from reality if you think pretending to be intersex makes you safer, and this bullshit is so fucking intersexist to do to begin with. you just see us as something to protect yourself, not individuals, not people, just an argument against transphobes when called for and a disguise for YOURSELF. Jesus Christ I can't believe I didn't see this shit sooner. It's because, again, it's so normalized to turn intersex individuals into concepts and statistics that I didn't realize how people did it.

hey can intersex people call out problematic shit perisex people say without someone opposing us like we just advocated for the murder of someone's grandma? A transmasc TikTok compilation on YouTube had a TikTok that advocated for perisex transmascs claiming to have a 'hormone deficiency' in order to pass, and I pointed out that pretending to be intersex to 'avoid' stigma is a super fucking shitty thing to do, and the creator was all like 'not only intersex people have hormone deficiencies uwu' like pal not only is that iffy in terms of factual correctness it's also just further erasure. I pointed out that entitled perisex transmascs shouldn't fucking go around telling people they have hypogonadism and this person's FIRST INSTINCT is to go 'well not just intersex people-' shut up please.

Trans men and trans women are not opposites. Hope this helps!