Starstark - -STARSTARK

love as devotion. love as worship. love as sunlight slanting into a place of worship. love as bowed head. love as standing still. love as where bhagirathi meets alaknanda. love as confluence. love as influence. love as the mountains you love so much. love as hands. love as kashi at twilight. love as removing shoes before entering the mandir. love as whatever makes you, you. love as look into me. tell me what you find there. tell me, tell me, tell me. love as I want to know everything. love as tell me everything mundane about you. which shoe do you wear first. how does the universe reveal itself to you. what do your eyes look like when you are in love. when you are angry. what does the inside of your body feel like. is there enough space for your heart. for your lungs. love as river. love as the fire offered to the river. love as river water, sky and flowers all at once. love as mantra. love as diyas. love as payals, jhumkas, mehendi and chaat. love as old building. love as crumbling but not disappearing. love as prayer. come home to me. come home to me. come home to me. love as eternal. love as the thing that outlasts us. love as the thing that outcasts us. love as the sky bruising purple and pink in yearning. love as feverish yearning. love as chaos. love as failed attempts. love as you have invariably changed me. love as avoiding cameras but not eyes. love as the outcome of a maths problem. love as desperation. love as weakness. love as I wish you had met past versions of me. love as in I have almost nothing to offer you. love as in I am terrified you will see my emptiness. love as trust. love as nothing has ever come close to the moon for me, except you. love as thrill. love as drama. love as epics. love as conviction. conviction. conviction. love as the opposite of shifting sands. love as solid ground. love as the thing you cannot fall beyond. love as the sky. the sky is light. light is time. love as time. love as finality. love love as my laughter means nothing if you are not here to see it. love as everyone I have loved has not loved me back. love as sleeping on a stiff hospital bench at night because my grandfather was sick. love as I would rather exist as the ashes of something than a whole where you did not touch me. love as feeding stray animals. love as climbing mountains to see God. love as climbing mountains to die. love as dying. love as having been held. having been loved. love as if I stop writing I will recede. love as peeled orange. love as sustenance. love as comfort food. love as I will come back. love as endings. love as nothing ends. love as everything ends. love as I am tired of impossibilities. I just want to go home.

bakwaaas, tumblr // and then we’ll be okay by exurb1a, youtube // a journal of love: the unexpurgated diary of anaïs nin (1934-1937) by anaïs nin // dead poets society (1989), dir. by peter weir // the thing is by ellen bass // soracities, tumblr // life is beautiful (1997), dir. by roberto benigni // vigilantelawdotgov, tumblr

Humanity looks up at hidden heavens in the sky, watching, waiting, calling out to something, to someone.

We seem to have this disposition for belief in a higher figure, wether it be a ruler of the sun or the diety of liquor. Such a human thing, to seek a larger figure. I suppose we hope our purpose is something bigger.