Laios Is Too Autistic To Fuck

“Laios is too autistic to fuck”

Terrible take, lame, weak crops, infantilizes autistic people

“Laios is too autistic to fuck normal”

Excellent, wonderful, borderline canon

God I miss the days when you could show up to a stranger’s farm and he’d say “What’s your name, boy?” and you’d take off your hat and hold it to your chest to better let him see your face and reply “Why I ain’t got none, sir, on account of my mammy passed on before she could give me one” and he’d tell you he’s real damn sorry to hear that and ask what he can do you for and you’d tell him that you can’t read nor even write neither but you’re mighty good with horses and can mend them fallen fence posts what you saw on your way in and won’t ask for nothing much more than a hot meal and a warm barn to sleep in and he’d keep his wife and daughters inside but send his boy who ain’t got married yet even though his mama tells him he needs a woman out with a lantern and some stew at night and the two of you’d get to talkin and he’d throw you his flask to take a swig from and watch you drinkin from it while he leant against the door frame and when he finally got called back on up to the house again he’d take a sip from it too real slow-like like it weren’t the whiskey what he were tryna savour

People should make elves weirder, enough of this “human but pointy ears, kinda tall, and better at magic” I want those motherfuckers to be ALIEN

I want elves that are weird enough for thinking that they’re hot to be considered a monster fucker take

If my boss schedules me to work the day of the local pride event, I’m gonna commit vehicular elder abuse