Stop Crediting Jeff Buckley With Hallelujah.

Stop crediting Jeff Buckley with Hallelujah.

It was Leonard Cohen. Please guys it was Leonard Cohen.

Anti-revenge narrative this, anti-revenge narrative that, I personally think that Inigo Montoya had the right idea when he stabbed Count Rugen in the gut and said "I want my father back, you son of a bitch"

Muppet remake of Beauty and the Beast where the only humans are Belle and the Prince. Not the Beast, the Prince. The Beast is played by the Prince in a full-sized muppet suit, a la Big Bird. When it comes time for the transformation scene, he takes off the muppet suit and leaves it lying flaccid on the ground, like the corpse of his former self, like a giant serpent that has shed his skin. Belle is enchanted by his human form; the rest of the muppets are having an existential crisis about the empty muppet suit he’s left behind.

Alternatively: Everyone is played by muppets, including Belle, and the Beast is played by a human, looking normal and human. And they keep talking about what a hideous beast he is, and how smooth his skin is, how terrifyingly tall he is, and how weird he looks. At the transformation scene, he turns back into a muppet, and everyone rejoices.

ITS APRIL 13 YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS

FETCH ME NEIL

Musings on Ants

I just want to understand the ants.

When I was young and foolish, i was lead to believe that the ants were always gathering food. You understand my confusion, then, at finding them swarming the lower corner of a wall in my bathroom. They were not there when I got into the shower at 1 am. But upon my emergence from the shower at 1:30, they were clumped there. Swarming.

I’m quite interested by the few that crawl outside of the large groups. Is that their job?

Perhaps one of them wandered in and saw something cool, and they called their friends to see.

I went to sleep and in the morning they were gone. No trail of ants, leading to however they got in. Or somewhere else in the room, where there might be other sights for them.

And it was warm outside! Where were they during the winter, when they should have been huddling in doors, stealing our crumbs? I thought in the spring, there would be plenty to see outside, in the dirt and trees.

Do ants die in the winter? Do they huddle in their holes and tell stories of summers past? Perhaps a hive mind is not conducive to storytelling.

Maybe I have more questions than I started with.