LMAAAOOOO

LMAAAOOOO

I’m gonna start writing the stuff I’m too embarrassed to make posts about as bad porno titles, for example:

Slutty Seeker Gets His Valve Scrubbed By Sexy Trinemates

Cassette Player Monitors Space Station **Gone Wrong** **Gone Sexual**

Science Officer Creates The Future Of Cybertron (Not Clickbait!!)

Prime Gets Close To Primus, Gets Off Matrix Style

Air Commander Jealous Of Sexy Scientist And Captivating Comms Officers Voracious Valves

Two Commanders, One Medic

When I saw OP I instantly thought of Optimus Prime and was confused but now I'm curious about what Optimus Prime thinks of Cheescake Factory and if his opinion is reasonable

ultimately the cheesecake factory menu fails to tell a queer narrative

Not if I sacrifice myself first!!

I’ll be brave enough to say it!!!

….

Tfp Soundwave deserves getting his valve busted wide open and I’ll be the human to sacrifice my body to crawl in him and do it.

Dude, I'm imagining Soundwave wearing the edging panel and IM GOING FERAL

Cybertronian sex toys must go crazy

False spikes that expand every time a bot overloads making it impossible for them to clench around it properly and leaving them absolutely gaping by the end

Fake panels designed to vibrate and stop keeping the wearer constantly edged throughout the day

Magnets that connect to each node inside a valve, stimulating them individually and in different ways and rhythms

Ballbearings that have been magnetised in different ways so they’re constantly shifting inside a valve

A matching set of a false spike and valve that can be connected to specific bot spike or valve so partners can interface not matter the distance

Vibrators that are made specifically for a bots spike sheath that keep the spike from extending as well as keeping unbearably it stimulated

LMFFFAAAOOOOO

Not him tho

This but the other way around

Thinking about Soundwave in a shirt that says "Me and the baddie I pulled by being autistic" while holding Megatron's hand