Lets Talk About Tropes

let’s talk about tropes

here’s a little (little?!) post on tropes, as promised!

some tropes i hate and why i hate them

love triangles: this one’s pretty simple and obvious. love triangles are unrealistic and toxic. they romanticize emotional cheating, and they cause nasty ship wars in fandoms, especially when two of the points in the triangle are women. often, the “losing” point of the triangle is a one-dimensional throwaway character who either gets killed off or accepts their fate and steps back for the “winner” to take over. this dynamic can get especially problematic when the “loser” is a woc and the “winner” is white, when the “loser” is an lgbtq+ character, and/or when the “loser” has no purpose other than to create drama for two other fleshed out characters. the character often ends up being hated for bad writing and “getting in the way” of the endgame ship. yikes. the only valid resolution to love triangles, imo, is a polyamorous relationship!!!

girl hate: it’s rare to see nice friendships and romances between women, and often this trope is used to drive an unnecessary wedge between two female characters who would have otherwise been great friends. i don’t mind when two women/girls are in conflict with one another for an interesting reason, but i absolutely hate when the conflict is based on something stereotypical and boring. the “girl hate” conflict is always based on something misogynistic, unrealistic, and/or stupid–like a man, looks, sexual practices, or a contrived competition. this is especially gross when the men in the story act as the voices of reason in the conflict, patronizing the women and teaching them how to be nice and use logic.

“strong female characters”: many writers mistake “strong” characters for characters who employ violence, sassiness, and masculine attributes to get what they want. I’m so over it. all I want is nuanced representation of women that doesn’t reduce them to a love interest or a sex object who looks down on other women. strength comes in many forms, and everyone defines it and identifies with it differently.

miscommunication: this has to be one of the laziest forms of prolonging drama, when two characters are fighting because of something that could easily be solved if they were locked in a room together for five minutes.

incest/incest-adjacent romances: this should go without saying, but we’re for some god-awful reason going through a period where incestuous relationships/fake-outs (ie, you’re in love with him? too bad he’s your brother. oh wait, it’s revealed that he’s not!/you two are blood related but you either never met or you went through a period of separation, so that means you can fall in love) are heavily romanticized or used to create extra drama, and it’s just unnecessary and not cute. i think authors use this to add some sort of edge or uniqueness to their writing, but it’s just so toxic and a complete turn-off for me.

aesthetic oppression: (term inspired by and similar to “aesthetic conflict,” thanks kat) when an author throws in some sort of oppression that is experienced by people in real life, but they either don’t address the oppression thoroughly or they only use it to add some sort of edge to their story and further a character’s romance, death, redemption arc, etc. for example, the homophobia in GOT season 6, which reduced loras to a walking stereotype of a gay man before he was subjugated by the church sept and blown up, and the patriarchy in ACOTAR that only exists to show how feminist rhysand is.

boys/men fighting, having tantrums, or expressing themselves through violence: it’s fine for male characters to fight every once in a while, but i just hate that this seems to be exclusively employed with male characters and it is used as a solution or reaction to problems when realistically, men are much more nuanced. men cry. they might be alone or in front of others. they might cry into their pillow or on a friend’s shoulder. fictional men add violence and anger to their sadness because the authors don’t want to emasculate them, but that’s a stupid goal and crying doesn’t affect someone’s gender. smashing your belongings when you are upset is unhealthy and potentially dangerous, and so is physically fighting others over trivial or patriarchal issues (ie a woman) when conversation could be/is probably much more compelling and effective. it’s important to show men that anger isn’t always the first emotion to feel under duress and that they don’t have to express their feelings by punching walls or throwing their belongings across the room. (also?! practically? YOU’RE RUINING YOUR OWN FUCKING STUFF AND/OR YOUR ROOMMATE/FRIEND/PARTNER’S STUFF, YOU ASSHOLE.)

sexy immortals: immortality can be used in clever and entertaining ways, but i feel like a lot of the immortals i’ve been seeing lately run in the same vein as the twilight vampires, which is to say: unearthly beautiful (aka conventionally attractive), overly sexy (aka stalking a love interest for the sake of “attraction”), apparently 16-25 years old (aka accessible to grown women who read/write ya).

uninvolved parents or non-existent guardian figures: sometimes young characters don’t have parents and that’s fine; some of my favorite books are about characters with one parent or no parents. but i still feel like we’re coming out of a period where it was very popular to kill off the parents (especially moms) at the beginning or before the story starts. i really want to see more exploration of characters with parents, or at least see the characters without parents make significant relationships with adults or react appropriately to the loss of their parents.

one-off character deaths: when a character enters one chapter or episode of a book/show just to immediately die for cheap emotional manipulation. this character is also sooooo often a marginalized person, and it’s super predictable and tired. try harder, author/screenwriter!

some tropes i love and why i love them

special snowflake/chosen one: I can’t explain it. I know it’s so cliche and one of the most hated ones out there, but I love when this trope is done right. I’m not a big fan of the chosen ones who have a special destiny, especially if the mc is a white boy, because that’s been done a million times before. but I’m a sucker for that one character who comes upon an unexpected special ability/object/creature or connection to a force of good/evil/nature and has to contend with that. They’ve been Chosen and they’re completely unprepared, and it’s gonna change their life trajectory and relationships and maybe even political climate.

woobies!!!: I feel like this trope is so underrated and it’s one of my favorites of all time. I absolutely love rooting for that one character who’s too good for any of the shit they’ve been through and Deserves Better^TM, but they manage to survive and grow against all odds.

found family: i love that authors are expanding the concept of family and unconventional narratives about love. the found family trope is so charming and relatable to many readers, and it’s great to see seemingly contrary characters come together to find a loving home together that isn’t necessarily romantic.

soft characters: it’s rare (though increasingly less rare, fortunately) to find soft boys, aka male characters who are compassionate, funny, kind, pensive, and/or quiet instead of brash, loud, violent, and angry. i know so many boys and men who fall all along the spectrum of masculinity, and it would be great to see more characters who represent that, especially because male characters are typically forced to express their masculinity in one way. i also absolutely love seeing women being equally as soft and kind–with the exception of ASOIAF!sansa, i feel like this kind of character has been cast aside for the sassy, rebellious, empowered^TM female character who isn’t like other girls and wields a bunch of weapons. i’d really like to see more female characters whose strengths come from empathy, intelligence, and emotion.

unique relationships within a friend group/ensemble: this one is marginally related to my love of found families. not only do i really like tight, strong friend groups, but i also like when each of the friends within that group has a different and compelling dynamic (hostile, romantic, friendly, tragic, whatever may have you) that can carry a scene or an arc. unique relationships between all the characters in an ensemble adds so much dimensionality to a story.

complex guardian figures: this mostly applies to ya, but i think it can also be said for many adult books and tv shows. adult characters often get flattened or sidelined for romance or action plots when in reality almost everyone has parent/guardian relationships, and these relationships are the source of so much complexity. that complexity may mean love, found family, anger, patronization, manipulation, and more, and all these things will be expressed differently based on the characters in question. for example, look at the difference between eleven and hopper from stranger things and harry and dumbledore from harry potter. hopper and dumbledore are so different and each of them carry darkness and baggage that comes out on the kids for better and worse. bonus points if the guardian is a woman, because these types of relationships between girls and women are relatively rare to the ones between boys and men.

anti-heroes/anti-villains: i think this is another one that goes without explaining. we’re all the hero of our own story, after all. if an author can successfully convince me to root for a character who i know is wrong but believes they’re in the right, or for a character who does the wrong things for the right reasons, there’s a good chance that i think very highly of that author.

stoic, bitter, angry characters: if there’s one character in the ensemble who has any of these traits, there’s a good chance they’ll be my favorite, especially if that character is a woman. usually this character’s journey is about what makes them vulnerable and how they become close with the most unlikely companions or form a special relationship with a foil character. it makes the audience feel like we’re being let in on a secret, specifically about that character.

and that’s about it! my inbox is always open to talk more in depth about any of these and more, so let me know. thanks so much for 700, you all are great :D

I had a surprisingly strong reaction to Marisha’s inclusion of “I Am Here,” on her Beau playlist, so naturally I felt compelled to write a thousand words about it.

I open up my heart You can love me or not There’s no such thing as sin Let it all come right in

Marisha chose this song as Beau’s tribute and remembrance of Molly, and these opening lines certainly reflect something of Molly’s general philosophy. As Taliesin has said, “There’s a way of both not giving a fuck about what people think, but giving a fuck about people.” Molly was always open with his affection, and generous with it. Beau, in contrast, closed herself off from the world as a coping mechanism. She realized just a little too late how much she actually appreciated Molly’s openness. We tend to focus on Beau’s resolve to “leave places better than she found them,” after Molly’s death, but I think her increased vulnerability, and willingness to be emotionally supportive (even when she hides it behind bravado) in recent episodes has also been a result of a shift in perspective prompted by Molly’s death.

I wanna make some mistakes, I wanna sleep in the mud

We know from things both Marisha and Beau have said that Beau has internalized the idea that she’s a “fuck up.” The desire to “make some mistakes,” is probably fraught for Beau. It’s one way you could characterize her criminal past and her general rebelling against her father. But there’s also a part of her that’s always just a little bit terrified that she’s going to prove everyone’s worst suspicions about her correct. I think she wants the freedom to be able to fuck up sometimes without it meaning that she is a fuck up. That’s something that’s come up a few times in smaller moments (Twiggy: I don’t really make the best decisions, Beau: I can relate; “Oh no! My actions affect other people!” from episode 45). Beau has been working hard to “leave every place better than she found it,” but she’s also been better at cutting herself some slack, and leaving herself room to make mistakes and learn in the process (“Having one transformative experience doesn’t mean you’re going to be better overnight. Being better is something you have to work at, I guess,” from ep 36). She doesn’t generally excoriate herself when she makes a mistake, but she’ll acknowledge it and try to move forward from there. This has actually been true since before episode 26/7. Her whole “learning to be polite” thing with Fjord carried across several episodes, and included her 1) willingly deciding she needed to apologize to Caleb (even though Fjord didn’t really think she needed to), and 2) knowing she would need help in the execution, and then asking for it. And while Beau’s general demeanor hasn’t changed, it’s so apparent how much those “lessons,” did really help with Beau’s ability to interact with people. (I’m still not over the fact that Beau apologized roughly five times in episode 45, and all of them were genuine.)

I wanna swim in the flood, I wanna fuck til I’m done I like whiskey on ice, I like sun in my eyes 

These lines reflect something of both Molly’s and Beau’s approaches to life. Beau once told Jester and Caleb that all she wants to do is “make a ton of money and drink a lot of booze, “ (ep 11). But where Molly’s hedonism was in some part due to a “life is short,” mentality, Beau’s pursuit of happiness and simple pleasures has something of a desperate edge to it. (As Marisha puts it: “She has never had an extended moment of happiness her whole life, and she’s still searching for it.”)

It’s also worth noting here that one of the ways Beau chose to honor Molly’s memory was to have a lot of sex. Learning how to “open up [her] heart,” in order to truly appreciating the joy of living in the world is just as important a thing for Beau to be striving for as her dedication to leaving places better than she found them. While it’s true that the two times Beau has (canonically) had sex didn’t really involve emotional connection (debatable in regards to Keg, though), I think they still represented her trying to break down some of her walls. Would Beau have felt compelled enough to proposition Keg if Molly hadn’t passed? I don’t think there’s a way to know the answer to that question, but it certainly seemed to factor into her decision in the moment.

I wanna burn it all down, so let’s start a fire I wanna be lost, so lost that I’m found Naked and laughing with my blood on the ground

Much as Beau claims to have no real goals or motivations, she’s clearly ready to fuck shit up and tear shit down when presented the opportunity. She has an almost knee-jerk opposition to authority in any and all forms (except maybe Fjord’s captaining). It’s one of the things that draws her to Dairon and the Expositors. I think it’s part of what motivated her to help the Knights of Requital (even if she was also significantly motivated by money), and it’s what made her such a terrifying (if somewhat unexpected) adversary to Avantika. Just because Beau is trying to commit herself to putting good into the world doesn’t mean it’s not going to come with a fair amount of chaos and destruction (e.g. freeing the Marid).

I am here, I am here I’ve already seen the bottom, so there’s nothing to fear I know that I’ll be ready when the devil is near I am here, I am here All of this wrong, but I’m still right here

I love that the song Marisha chose for Beau’s memory of Molly is so much about being present in the face of tragedy. “I am here,” can mean so many things. It can be a declaration of presence, or of defiance and resolve (“all of the this wrong, but I’m still right here”). For Beau, there may even be some survivor’s guilt mixed in. She’s still “here” when Molly isn’t, because he was trying to protect her. What are the chances even a small part of her believes she doesn’t deserve to be here?

Regardless, one thing remains: the worst has happened, but Beauregard is made of tenacity. Murder and kidnap her friends and she’ll all but kill you with her bare hands. Beau may not be caring or soft in traditional ways, but she’s fiercely protective of her friends and committed to keeping them safe.

I don’t have the answers but the question is clear Let me ask you Where does everybody go when they go? 

In Marisha’s write-up for this song, she writes, “[this was Beau’s] first real lesson that in this world and in this life that they’re living, if you hold onto something that you want to say to someone, you might lose the opportunity forever, at any moment.” This leads me to believe that this is the first time Beau has really had to grapple with the death of someone close to her. Even if Beau intellectually understands what death “is,” actually wrestling with the knowledge that someone is just gone is a lot to process. I’m honestly not sure whether this would be easier or harder to grapple with in a world where there’s proof of gods and an afterlife. I would imagine that people still wonder “where do you go when you die,” and I don’t think those answers would feel any clearer even if they factually exist.

May the light be upon me May I feel in my bones that I am enough I can make anywhere home

“My I feel in my bones that I am enough,” is one of the lines that prompted me to write this post to begin with. I kept wanting to pick a favorite bit of the song before realizing how well all of it fits Beau. But this line, specifically, breaks my heart precisely because we know that Beau doesn’t think she’s enough. In fact, she often seems to be afraid of the very prospect–she feels compelled to couch her good intentions and kind gestures in self-effacing bravado and deprecation. She so desperately wants to be “enough,” but is so used to being too much, or too abrasive for others that she has a tendency to put up walls to mask how much she seeks validation. The Mighty Nein–and Fjord and Jester in particular–were the first people to see past that and accept it. Fjord and Jester are also particularly good at seeing past her tough exterior in her more genuine moments (e.g. Fjord recognizing when Beau’s actually being nice, even when it comes across as sarcastic; or Jester understanding what Beau is offering when she tries to downplay her ability to be a ‘best friend,’ in episode 46). Of the Mighty Nein, Beau has the fewest emotional ties to a given “home,” (with the possible exception of Fjord), and has clearly decided that the Mighty Nein–wherever they are, and wherever they might go–are her home.

I can think of one thousand places much worse than this

And who wants to bet that even in their scariest moments, everything she’s encountered with the Mighty Nein is still vastly better than where she started out?

hey i’m trying to prove a point to a friend so uh critters can you please reblog this with your sexuality and your favourite cast member!!

happy Thursday the 20th

short summary of the situation in Sudan