SCREAMING, KICKING MY FEET, GIGGLING

SCREAMING, KICKING MY FEET, GIGGLING

Hi if it’s not obvious I fucking love Bernard hes so yes and the charecter i kin, bc ofc the character that can threaten writing cringe fanfics is who I say “yes. Me. That one.” To.

I love the idea of them being like this for him and I feel like at his first gala he would be like this but over time bc he is so good at talking for a while(i can tell this boy rants) he’d probably get better at it and eventually be really good at making a charecter to play at events not even bc he needs too but just for funzies^^

i do love the idea of the wayne kids giving bernard shovel talks about taking care of tim and all that but also give me batfam who are just as protective of bernard as they are of each other.

give me bernard, attending his first wayne gala as tim's significant other. having a suit custom tailored and funded by bruce even if bernard insists it's not necessary because he already has one. arriving at the gala anxious because of course he is, it's a goddamn socialite event, but being protected from every side by the wayne kids even when tim is dragged away.

Socialite: Oh, and who might you be?

Bernard: Oh, um, hi. I'm Bernard Dowd, nice to meet you.

Socialite: Dowd? I've never heard of your family before. Who...?

Bernard: I'm not here with my family, miss, I'm here with my boyfriend.

Socialite: ... Boyfriend?

Bernard: Yeah, I'm here with Tim.

Socialite, frowning: Tim... as in Drake-Wayne? He has a boyfriend?

Dick, coming up next to Bernard: He sure does! Bernard here is practically one of ours now, aren't you? He matters to Timmy, so he matters to us.

Bernard: Dick—

Dick: C'mon, let's get you back to Timmy. Farewell, Mrs!

Bernard: I could've handled that.

Dick: All the rules that apply to my siblings during galas apply to you too. I'm sure you could've, but you shouldn't have to. I've got your back too, now, yeah?

Bernard: ... Yeah. Thanks, Dick.

Jason, coming up to Bernard at the bar: Not to freak you out, kid, but there's a guy starin' at ya from the other side of the bar. Y'know him or should I encourage him to look away?

Bernard, startled: Huh? (looks around) Oh. No, I don't know him. Why... is he looking at me like that, actually?

Jason, scowling: 'S just how the slimy fuckers at these events are. Can't keep their eyes off anything that's small, young or pretty. Disgusting. I'll deal with him— where's your annoying other half gone, inferior blondie?

Bernard: Tim? He got pulled away for quote; 'something important' by some lady. He said he'll meet me here after he's done, so I've been waiting.

Jason: Huh. If I see him I'll point him yer way. Hey, don't be 'fraid to ask any of us questions or for help if ya need it. We know the best how daunting this shit can be.

Bernard, genuinely touched: ... Thanks, Jason.

Jason: Yeah, yeah. Don't tell Timmers I said that, though, he'll call me a loser.

Bernard, laughing: I won't.

Bernard, being talked to by several people at once and a bit overwhelmed by the attention: Uh— I'm—

Damian, stepping between him and the socialites: Dowd. I require your assistance.

Bernard: Um— hi, Damian— with what?

Damian: You will see when we get there. Follow me, Drake's more tolerable half.

Bernard: Okay... so what do you need from me?

Damian: Nothing. You seemed to dislike the attention from all of the nosy adults over there. It was the most efficient way of extracting you from the situation.

Bernard: Oh. Thanks, Damian.

Damian: Tt, don't thank me yet, Dowd. I am still criticising your choice in romantic partners.

Bernard: Didn't you threaten me with a katana to not dampen Tim's mood in any way shape or form?

Damian: Slander. I said quote 'if you make Drake more annoying by breaking his heart I'm going to maim you.' I don't see how you got the message you did from that.

Bernard, grinning: Sure, Damian. Sure.

THE IAN GUNTHER REFF IS CRAZY- but yes I need dick getting volunteered to go to the Olympics by literally everyone but bc he’s the only one refusing to he doesn’t go, but Tim posting it is something I can see very clearly in my head^^

In universe, Dick Grayson's equivalent of Bruce dropping out of med school is absolutely everyone demanding to know why he didn't go to the Olympics with his gymnastics abilities.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA…. Thank you for your time and this masterpiece.

Also live laugh love Bernard<3333

Give me unhinged Timberkon.

Give me Bernard stalking Red Robin the same way Tim stalked batman. Give me stalker Kon, who while stalking Tim when he's overwhelmed by the world, discovers Bernard and chooses to stalk him too- just to sus him out at first, but slowly it becomes an infatuation. He's listening to both their heartbeats at night.

Give me Bernard realising he's being followed because Kon isn't as subtle as he thinks. Bernard stalking SB back, creating a theory board dedicated just to him.

Give me Tim stalking SB when they're at the tower and he's bored. Tim stalking Bernard to make sure he gets home safe. Tim realising that he's not the only one keeping him safe when he spots a flash of red and blue and leather speed off and out of sight. Tim realising that Bernard has been stalking his hero persona, that he has several boards of photos and newspaper clippings about him and Kon, about the bats and the core four.

Give me Kon, who would die for either of them, put himself in the way of immense danger, become stupid and reckless in the name of protecting what he loves. Would sacrifice himself in every scenario to ensure Tim and Bernard are safe.

Give me Tim who would infiltrate the government for his boys, would do anything, hack anything to assure their safety. Would bug their house just to make sure nothing ever happened to them. Would go insane trying to bring them back if he ever failed.

Give me Bernard who would kill for them. Who would readily bloody his hands in the name of love if it ever came to it. Who would use everything he learned in that cult to ruins someone's life if they hurt what was his.

Give me timberkon who's love is so whole, so intense, that it cannot be contained by ethics nor morals.

YES MENTION HOW INSANE HE IS IN FOCS MORE PLEASEEEEEE

I need more of how he trained with deathstroke in stuff bc im pretty dang sure the batfam just doesn’t know about it(along with them not knowing 90% of his character)

And to add to this on a silver plate I hand you

✨spyral arc✨ just the entirety of that and that one part where he just casually knows the weaknesses of the entire JL by memory enough to the point where he just told it to someone so they could win a fight.

Live laugh love mentally insane dick Grayson

<333333333333333333333333333333333

We don’t see Insane Nightwing enough for my tastes like:

This mf listens to NO ONE if he doesn’t want to and everyone just goes “omg what a great leader always with a better plan.”

Argues with fucking BATMAN of all people and is not a stranger to winning said arguments.

Has been kicking villain ass since 8 years old and can figure out what your great-great-great aunt twice removed was doing on April 16, 1721 and will use it as blackmail for your entire bloodline.

Probably still uses Facebook.

Would 100% wear Velcro Lightning McQueen light-up sketchers and outrun you in them only to do a quadruple backflip at the finish line as his victory dance.

He knows the exact behavior patterns and personalities of his entire team/family/coworkers and can plan their movements/reactions to near perfection in almost any circumstance. Has used this to prank them.

Learned how to cook out of spite to prove to Bruce he could live on his own (after one of the aforementioned fights. Also, after proving he could live on his own, was not immediately alerted to his little brother’s passing because Bruce has a Complex).

“Tim! Tie your shoes when you walk down the stairs you could trip and get hurt!” “You literally just got shot please worry about yourself for once??”

Has trained under Batman’s pacifistic “no killing” policy and then also fucking Deathstroke the Assassin and Mercenary. Neither one was particularly kind to his psyche

Killed the joker but imo was very justified and not insane at all. But also just sort of just… let blockbuster get killed that one time. Has also killed others

The whole vampire series??? I still haven’t read that one yet but everything I’ve heard about it has been against my will

Has had beef with multiple children (special shoutout to Jason Todd)

Somehow made peace with his family after Bruce allowed all of his other children to don the name Robin, which was given to Dick by his Very Dead mother (and of which the meaning how now been diluted and the connection to his parents severed)

Please add on to this if yall think of anymore bc I just know that man has his Moments

I don’t normally ship Thalia and Bruce bc I see them as a slightly different dynamic but I love the way this is put sm and it makes me happy^^

The kids are chaotic and with no idea how they ended up in this situation Talia and Lois did a Wife Swap. Which is very entertaining as Talia canonically have beef with the Superfamily.

Alfred: Going morning Mrs. Lane, apologies that Master Bruce and the kids can not greet you right now. They are training.

Lois: What do you mean training? It's 6 AM.....

Clark: Good morning....Talia.

Talia: Good morning Kent. Though we don't get along I apologize for interrupting your training session.

Clark: Training session? It's 6 AM in the morning.

Talia: Judging by your comment I assume the children are still asleep?

Clark: Yes....because it's 6 AM.

Lois: Does everyone always argue with each other every minute?

Batfamily: We're not arguing!

Lois: Yes you are, my family tends to talk things out calmly.

Jason: We're not arguing it's called playful banter

Lois: Sure....

Jon: Why are you dressed like that?

Talia: Dressed like what?

Kon: Dressed so fancy... we're going to do farm work.

Talia: I am aware of that. This is my farm work attire. Thank you very much.

Clark, Kon and Jon: ......

Lois: Sooooo what do you and Talia do together?

Bruce: Sometimes we like to sit beside each other reading a book in silence.

Lois: ......

Bruce: .......

Lois: Oh! You're serious!

Kon: I was thinking of getting a nose piercing but mom and dads disapprove or whatever

Talia: I reccomend a nose piercing. They are really cute and I have one.

Kon: Coolll

Clark: TALIA STOP TRYING TO INFLUENCE MY CHILD

Lois to the Batfamily: I've always thought that you guys are dysfunctional but looking at it up close makes me realize you are far beyond that.

Love this sm and the idea of duke having so many random ass stims is my favorite thing ever.

Also to make this post worst(read: better) the second I read this my brain supplied that Bruce picked it up from two face/harvey and dent can still be seen doing it once or twice before he flips the coin

Your welcome^^

Headcannon that Bruce spins a coin constantly. He’s such an antsy, fidgety guy, just imagine him, impatiently twirling a coin across his knuckles while he waits for the computer to load. While he’s tied to bed rest. Any time and anywhere he is spinning that coin. And Dick naturally picks up on it, sitting on the table next to Bruce who’s typing at the batcomputer with one hand, twirling a coin with the other, watching his fingers intently and trying to copy it. And of course the coin falls so many times but he keeps at it and can do it just as aptly as Bruce. And it’s common for Bruce, on his way to the watchtower, to just take dicks hand and twirl the coin onto his knuckles and dick doesn’t even look up, just keeps twirling and calls out a ‘bye dad’ because Batman can’t have ticks or common habits, not in the league. And Jason sees dick do it one time and just has to be like his big brother so he learns, easier than dick did because he’s a street kid and as a thief you learn stuff like that. And Tim sees Robin and Batman doing it and learns while he’s still watching them, twirling a coin from an opposite rooftop while recording them. Steph learns how to do it because she got hurt and Bruce sat with her while she was confined to bed rest and taught her and she also just wanted to one up Tim. Babs learns because at this point it’s a rite of passage, plus she and dick are very competitive and while he was learning she just had to learn quicker. Damian sees them all doing it and must learn, it is a Robin thing after all. Duke already knows how to do it when he joins the family and all of them kinda hate him for it but not really. Of course Alfred knows how to do it. 

The sound of coins jangling is associated with Batman and any villain or goon that hears it immediately shits their pants. (They can no longer go to the bank it’s so bad)