Im Not Saying Ive Found My Spirit Animal (pace Actual Bunnies), But Never Has There Been A Clearer Picture

I’m not saying I’ve found my spirit animal (pace actual bunnies), but never has there been a clearer picture of me first thing on any given morning.

Workmen Spending Some Time in the Building:

Day 1: Good morning, I am thebuni, the principal keyholder. If you need anything while you’re here please do feel free to call me. Let me show you to the kettle.

Day 3: Someone else let you in? Cool, thanks for the lie-in. Why yes, these are my favourite p’jim-jams.

 The last time my parents helped me move house my mother looked around my partially-packed flat and said half-thoughtfully, half-bewildered,

“Have you ever considered....not buying books..?”

Person: You need to stop buying books.

Me: no I don’t

Person: there is no space in your room for them!

Me: I need more bookshelves!

Person: you’re hoarding them.

Me: I’m collecting them

My last tutoring place of the evening sent me home with a mango as a sort of combined iftar / sorry-for-cancelling-the-next-three-weeks-of-lessons gift but it was really ripe and I was scared to put it in my bag as it would squish so I was walking down the Whitechapel Rd and then sitting on a bus just sorta... gingerly clutching a single small mango.

I may occasionally demonstrate all the intellectual vigour of a potato, but my god, I have the hand-eye coordination of a mach 3 fighter pilot.

FTR, that picture below of the snowy valley is the one that fried my phone’s SD card and irretrievably lost me about 18 months worth of photos that I hadn’t backed up.

I hope it was worth it, you bastard.