Obligated? Irritating? An Annoyance? A Disruption? Tamlins Face Fell, Almost Instantly Into Genuine Shock,

Obligated? Irritating? An annoyance? A disruption? Tamlin’s face fell, almost instantly into genuine shock, if not sadness. He felt his heart speed up in his chest as she walked away, so terribly small in the daunting darkness. No, no, no. I am not that bad at this!

How can I be giving all that I am and it never be enough?

His frustration surged and his fists tightened, but another question lingered in his mind. Am I? Is that truly all I have to give?

A lack of cruelty is not a kindness. His mother had once said. Her appeal had fallen on empty ears and slid down his stone walls like storms.

Why? Why do I always have to be the bigger person? Why was I given so much weight to bear?

Tamlin lingered in the doorway and motioned a sentry to follow Briar from a polite distance. A rough start was right and it had certainly not been completely on her. If anything, all of the flack should fall upon him. He was the leader. He was the example. He was the one they all looked to when hope was gone.

What about when my hope is gone? Tamlin lowered himself to the stone steps and conjured a small ball of light into his fingers, forming it into the shape of a small bird. He blew the embers into the darkness and the followed the last that he could see of her as she disappeared.

Hope was a fragile flame. It could burn out. He was close to the end of the line, himself. If he did not sleep, tomorrow would only be worse. He hugged his cloak tightly to his body and ventured up the dark staircase. It smelled faintly of blueberries and vanilla — like the pancakes his mother used to make on hard days. Tamlin lay down on his cold bed and curled his knees to his chest, fully wrapped in his cloak. For the first time in many weeks, he closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep with no dreams.

Stone Walls & Sacrifice | Tamlin & Briar @springcourthighlady

Tamlin was more than ready to leave by the time he finished listening to Briar’s rant. He let her finish — he wasn’t that impolite. His brisk footsteps echoed across the marble flooring and he looked over his shoulder, hoping that he was not followed. 

Yet, he was not that lucky. The prospects of desert with Lucien and Elain were slipping further away by the minute. Tamlin stilled when she called his name, pressing his lips into a thin line. Why won’t she go home? This is life, in Spring, right now. We’re all worried. We’re all frustrated. We all have family in need of aid. No one gets special privileges. Not even me — 

He didn’t even have privacy anymore, or space to think. Though, when he glanced over his shoulder, he was relieved to find some regret in her eyes. 

Only his friends called him by his first name. He wasn’t big on enforcing rank, but found it odd how casually she addressed him. 

He pressed his tongue into the edge of his teeth, forbidding the quick retort which danced on the edge of his lips. I will not lose it. I cannot. They cannot see me as a beast. 

He turned, stuffing his hands deeply into the pockets of his jacket, to hide how they’d tensed into fists. Running from his problems wasn’t effective, but neither was forcing himself into a corner until he lost his temper. 

Tamlin saw her hand reach for him. He wanted to back away. It had been over two years since a woman had touched him, apart from Calanmai. He flinched, but did not move. He wasn’t sure he could. 

She cares for me? I have met this female once. 

Tamlin swallowed, gravely still. “I understand your attachment, Lady Briar. Yet, if you cannot trust me as High Lord of Spring, no plan I create to bring Caiden home will be enough for you.”

He stepped away, lowering his green eyes to the ground. “If you’ll excuse me, it has been a long day.” 

I know the Spring Court warriors have the prettiest fae armor everrrrr 🥺 imagine those as the armor Tamlin wears during the war-band camp times

Tamlin turned, visibly working to soften his expression before he spoke. He didn’t hate his title. He didn’t hate the long hours or the sacrifices he’d made. He certainly loved his people. Yet, over the last several years he had realized that he could not carry the entire kingdom on his own two shoulders. Being alone was his time of sanctuary. Having Briar see him without the stone walls which so carefully guarded his heart from the public was uncomfortable — almost unbearable. 

Yet, he struggled to move away when her soft hand rested on his arm. It wasn’t much, a simple request for attention, but it reminded him once again of just how much it ached to be alone. 

He still had Lucien, but Lucien was a mated male now and a married one. Although his fox was continually loyal and still often there on the occasion that his panic overwhelmed his sobriety, Tamlin knew that things would never be the same. 

He had Feyre, on the edge of his defenses, sitting just beyond the portcullis of his heart. There were many long, lonely nights where he nearly ended up back at her door before his common sense stepped over his bleeding heart. That would never be the same ever.

Spring would never be the same.

He would never be the same.

For the briefest of moments, his small joys of a child’s laughter and the great outdoors had been witnessed by a stranger and it hurt. 

Tamlin swallowed and stepped back, noticing, that she still had his cloak. He didn’t have the heart to ask for it back. Especially, when he could conjure another on a moment’s notice. 

“What you saw,” He said slowly. “In the garden…was not meant for your eyes. It was meant for no one but myself and that little boy.”

He spoke in a measured, tenor beat. “I have never been one formalities. I do not mind you calling me by my name. That is…its purpose. However, I cannot abide with any form of yelling as a form of communication.”

Tamlin sighed and looked up, honestly meeting her eyes, as himself, for the first time. “Please believe me that I understand your passion and I feel it. I have gone to the end of the earth for the fem— people I have loved. That little boy you saw being one of many.” 

He ran his fingers through his blonde hair. “I have a plan for Caiden, but it is not something I can accomplish alone, or overnight. Given the late hour of the day, I need to speak to my sentries and my emissary before anything happens further.”

“Will you meet me tomorrow?” He asked, eyebrows piquing upward. He was not just Tamlin. He was not just the High Lord of Spring. He was both. There were parts of him kept hidden away. He only hoped she was willing to listen. “After court. Before noon.”

Stone Walls & Sacrifice | Tamlin & Briar @springcourthighlady

Tamlin was more than ready to leave by the time he finished listening to Briar’s rant. He let her finish — he wasn’t that impolite. His brisk footsteps echoed across the marble flooring and he looked over his shoulder, hoping that he was not followed. 

Yet, he was not that lucky. The prospects of desert with Lucien and Elain were slipping further away by the minute. Tamlin stilled when she called his name, pressing his lips into a thin line. Why won’t she go home? This is life, in Spring, right now. We’re all worried. We’re all frustrated. We all have family in need of aid. No one gets special privileges. Not even me — 

He didn’t even have privacy anymore, or space to think. Though, when he glanced over his shoulder, he was relieved to find some regret in her eyes. 

Only his friends called him by his first name. He wasn’t big on enforcing rank, but found it odd how casually she addressed him. 

He pressed his tongue into the edge of his teeth, forbidding the quick retort which danced on the edge of his lips. I will not lose it. I cannot. They cannot see me as a beast. 

He turned, stuffing his hands deeply into the pockets of his jacket, to hide how they’d tensed into fists. Running from his problems wasn’t effective, but neither was forcing himself into a corner until he lost his temper. 

Tamlin saw her hand reach for him. He wanted to back away. It had been over two years since a woman had touched him, apart from Calanmai. He flinched, but did not move. He wasn’t sure he could. 

She cares for me? I have met this female once. 

Tamlin swallowed, gravely still. “I understand your attachment, Lady Briar. Yet, if you cannot trust me as High Lord of Spring, no plan I create to bring Caiden home will be enough for you.”

He stepped away, lowering his green eyes to the ground. “If you’ll excuse me, it has been a long day.” 

Imam Al-Ghazali // Tennessee Williams

Tamlin was no stranger to young females fawning over him. In fact, his business like manner reflected just often it happened. He was used to it. For some, his power and title were alluring and they tried to use their beauty to sway him. For others, his own physique distracted them from the task at hand. Briar seemed uninterested in his title, given that she often forgot to use it.

It didn’t bother him, so much as it confused him. She seemed overly familiar — while he’d only first met her last night. He remembered the rescue in Hybern, of course; but it was a rescue. There was nothing personal about it. He scratched his head and intensified the glamor over his own beauty, curious to see how she would react. His high fae glow was now completely masked. If anything, apart from his pointed ears, he looked fairly human.

It went without saying that he was slow to trust others. If she was dead set on knowing him, he wanted to know why. Tamlin pursed his lips. “I will try to say this…with sensitivity, but please pardon my manners if I speak too harshly. I do not have Lucien’s silver tongue.”

He paused, before speaking. “It goes without saying that a Tavern is no place to raise a child. I do not mean to insult your effort, your intentions, nor your integrity. It is simple fact. Not to mention, I still don’t believe you’ve had a proper meal.”

His eyes graced her shaking fingers with compassion. “Would you please consider speaking to my estate manager about finding employment and suitable living conditions within the manor? You will be among many. Paid well. Fed well. With a roof over your head. Caiden will be sent to school while you work. You will have no need to worry.”

Stone Walls & Sacrifice | Tamlin & Briar @springcourthighlady

Tamlin was more than ready to leave by the time he finished listening to Briar’s rant. He let her finish — he wasn’t that impolite. His brisk footsteps echoed across the marble flooring and he looked over his shoulder, hoping that he was not followed. 

Yet, he was not that lucky. The prospects of desert with Lucien and Elain were slipping further away by the minute. Tamlin stilled when she called his name, pressing his lips into a thin line. Why won’t she go home? This is life, in Spring, right now. We’re all worried. We’re all frustrated. We all have family in need of aid. No one gets special privileges. Not even me — 

He didn’t even have privacy anymore, or space to think. Though, when he glanced over his shoulder, he was relieved to find some regret in her eyes. 

Only his friends called him by his first name. He wasn’t big on enforcing rank, but found it odd how casually she addressed him. 

He pressed his tongue into the edge of his teeth, forbidding the quick retort which danced on the edge of his lips. I will not lose it. I cannot. They cannot see me as a beast. 

He turned, stuffing his hands deeply into the pockets of his jacket, to hide how they’d tensed into fists. Running from his problems wasn’t effective, but neither was forcing himself into a corner until he lost his temper. 

Tamlin saw her hand reach for him. He wanted to back away. It had been over two years since a woman had touched him, apart from Calanmai. He flinched, but did not move. He wasn’t sure he could. 

She cares for me? I have met this female once. 

Tamlin swallowed, gravely still. “I understand your attachment, Lady Briar. Yet, if you cannot trust me as High Lord of Spring, no plan I create to bring Caiden home will be enough for you.”

He stepped away, lowering his green eyes to the ground. “If you’ll excuse me, it has been a long day.” 

Nicole W. Lee, from "Even the Dust"