Dearest Gaud,

Dearest Gaud,

I do not know what you are made of. I would like to know what you’re made of. Please tell me what you’re made of. Please please please please please please please please

Today, I had my demonias on. This guy was behind me and yelled, “LOOK AT THE FAG IN THE BOOTS,” and lil’ buddy thought he was doing something. Like, yeah. Look at me. I’m hot

I met a goat yesterday. She looks like Baphomet. She is a mother. She is shedding weirdly. She is an introvert. She likes waffle cones. Her name is Vampy. I would kill for her.

I just want three other people to do that lil’ part in the Russian sailor dance with. Is that too much to ask??

I have come to realize that in this day and age, in my small town specifically, I have caused a small group of people to reinvent Christianity in a less meaningful way. They all want to kill one guy to pay for all evil in the world. They also all think I’m going to kill this guy. And this guy keeps asking me for help like I’m gonna get him out of this. This guy is me. I’m effectively Jesus, Judas, and god in this senecio and I’M LIVING FOR IT

Thinkin’ about when I came out to my best friend (at the time) who was (said* she was) a lesbian. I then told her about my current partner (who I wasn’t yet with) and how he was my favorite person currently living. She then told me how she was into me (thelileggBOY) and how she could see a future with me. So like a month later I started dating my partner and she started dating the literal scum of the earth (but that’s a different story)