Why Do Men... Or Ppl...?

Why do men... or ppl...?

The RG Kar Incident: DON'T CLOSE YOUR EYES TO RAPE

I’m unsure of how many non-Indians or even non-Bengalis know of this. Regardless of whether you do or do not, I would request you to reblog this post & share awareness about this. DON'T LET INJUSTICE GO UNPUNISHED.

On August 9, 2024, the body of 31-year-old post-graduate medical trainee, Dr. Moumita Debnath, was found partially naked in the seminar room of RG Kar, a hospital in Kolkata. She had just finished working a 36-hour night shift before this and, out of exhaustion, had fallen asleep while studying in the nearest seminar room on the fourth floor of the hospital.

Her family was informed beforehand that she had committed suicide, to which her mother emphasized on the fact that her daughter could never carry out such an act. On further investigation, it was found that Dr. Debnath had been raped and murdered in her sleep.

According to the Deccan Herald,

“There was bleeding from both her eyes and mouth, injuries over the face and nail. The victim was also bleeding from her private parts. She also has injuries in her belly, left leg… neck, in her right hand, ring finger and… lips. [...] “Her neck bone was also found broken. It seems that she was first strangulated and then smothered to death.”

According to Medical Dialogues,

“There were multiple hairs on the mattress and blood was soaked on the blue mattress [...]”

Later, it was found that Dr. Debnath’s glasses were shattered and her eyes were pierced with the shards of her glasses themselves.

Although one of the criminals (Sanjoy Roy) has been arrested, I am certain that there are others involved. In fact, it has been found that Sanjoy Roy, despite being an outsider, was granted access to PG Kar via personal relations with senior police officers.

The chief minister of West Bengal (despite being a woman herself) as well as members other political parties are trying, behind the scenes, to let this case fade away. Why? Oh right, it's really the privileged, upper class & upper caste sons and brothers of ministers who are behind this! No major crime can happen in a country without there being the hand of one or more influential persons, often politically involved.

Sisters and brothers, দিদিরা ও দাদারা, it would be a sin to remain silent in the face of such a crime. Our brave brothers & sisters pursuing medical practise have ceased working in their hospitals to protest against this grave crime against women, against humanity. We cannot let this injustice go unpunished! A crime against a single woman is a crime against all of us! We were born from a woman, raised by a woman—and now, when we see the honour, dignity and life of women at stake, won’t we join the andolan? Won’t we fight for what is right?

Requesting all Kolkata residents (who can) to join in at least any one of the protests mentioned below. There are provisions for elderly & disabled people. Men are invited to join us as well.

For those who want to join the Reclaim the Night protest at 11:55 p.m., please refer to this list of contact numbers (according to your region) provided by Miru Didi ( @arachneofthoughts )

Take hold of the night! We have always been told to stay wary of nighttime and the dangers, manifested in the form of cruel men, we may face. Not anymore—we must reclaim the night! How much fear is fear enough? If anyone wants to know further details and the phone numbers regarding this first event, please DM me.

Blowing the conch has always been a signal of strength. In traditional Bengali culture, it is almost always the women who blow the conch, be it in Durga Puja or the everyday pujas carried out at home. It was, and always will remain a sign of victory over evil. At 11:55 p.m., all those who cannot join the midnight assembly (the aforementioned event) can, instead, blow the conch from their own houses! Let them know you're not afraid. Let them know you've had enough. Let them know that once a revolution starts, especially one spearheaded by women, takes a long, long time to end.

[Please Note: These protests are not personally organised by me. I simply am in touch and will be attending the protest tonight.]

If you can, please do take the time to sign this petition below (courtesy of Miru Didi @arachneofthoughts) to aid our efforts:

Change.org

Sign the Petition

People assaulting Doctors should be punished like Terrorists

If nothing, please do take the time to share and reblog this post wherever you can! DON'T LET RAPE GO UNPUNISHED!

Is This Love?

yang jungwon x reader [afab]

genre: fluff

concept: despite barely being of noble blood yourself there's nothing your family wants more for you than to find a man of high class and finally marry into a family of wealth and reputation. you aren't so taken with the idea, and instead find yourself gravitating to a man that your mother couldn't dislike more.

w/c: 4.7k

warning: regency era au, period typical racism and racist commentary (not graphic or violent, reader is heavily implied to not be of asian descent), period typical classist commentary, yearning, forbidden love

You’ve never really been one for parties, but it never fails that the sun of the summer tends to bring people out in droves to enjoy the sunshine and the warm weather. You’ve also never really cared for summer though, long evenings spent in your parlor, sitting in front of the fire with a hot pot of tea and a book have always been your preferred evenings but that’s quite a long way off. Right now, you’re being forced to languish away in hot skirts, fanning yourself in an effort to give yourself some kind of breeze and entertaining young suitors that you truly have no interest in. 

It’s all your mother’s doing. “You’re not getting any younger,” she reminds you day in and day out about your biological clock and how you’re running out of time. It doesn’t matter to you, the idea of bearing the children of these pompous, exhausting men is a nightmare in and of itself. If you never bear a child and spend the rest of your life being called ‘baren’ ‘cold’ and a ‘spinster,’ well, so be it.

“Oh, goodness,” your best friend whispers to you behind her own fan. The garden party today is crowded, so you’ve decided to seek refuge beside your best friend, despite the fact that she’s being trailed by her incredibly well meaning fiance. They’ll be getting married when the weather turns, it’s going to be a huge party, you’ve been helping her plan it since he proposed last autumn. Still, she’s your only lifeline that’s not either condescendingly commenting about how unfortunate it is you’ve not found a man yet or pushing said men directly onto you. 

“Something the matter?” You ask her, sipping delicately from your crystal glass. The water is tepid but it’s better than whatever booze concoction is in the communal drinking bowl. 

“Nothing,” she chirps but you simply lift a brow. “Did you happen to see who just arrived?” You shake your head but then slowly turn your head towards the entrance to the garden. “Late as always. No one taught the foreigner how to read a clock,” she comments. You glare in her direction for just a moment before turning back towards where the newest attendee of the garden party has entered. 

He’s a young man, about your age, with wide eyes, dark hair and he’s dressed impeccably in his charcoal grey suit. His hair is combed neatly away from his face and he’s greeting anyone who looks in his direction with a politeness they neither understand nor deserve. He’s always been this way, from the moment you met him last spring, transplanting from the far reaches of the East right into your back garden. If anyone had the slightest understanding of what they were looking at they would treat him better, at the very least because of the regality he seems to display and the handsomeness of his features. 

“An hour late,” your friend drones, rolling her eyes. 

“No later than you’ve ever been to a garden party. Might I remind you what kept you during all those balls during our school years?” You tease her. She harrumphs, turning to her fiance. 

“Darling, would you get me something to drink? This weather has me just parched,” she tells him. He goes without any other prodding and you smirk behind your fan. Once he’s outside of earshot she turns to you harshly. “Shut your mouth. What do you know about the things I did in our school years?” 

“You forget who covered for you so quickly?” You retort. She huffs, waving her fan around faster, as though it will be enough to cool the heat of her blush as it makes its way around her ears and up her neck. “Face it, you only say such things because you don’t care for him,” you insist. 

“As if I’m alone in that opinion,” she retorts haughtily. You don’t remember her being this petty when you were young, but you can’t very well be too surprised. She is marrying a Lord’s son and that’s sure to bring her a fair amount of social status. It makes her head the size of the moon some days, when she’s feeling especially like she suddenly deserves the world just because of who she’s going to be marrying. 

You’re just a Viscount’s daughter, which means you are owed quite a bit less status that she will inherit. Not that status has ever really mattered all that much to you. Your mother insists upon it, marrying up in the world. She did, after all, a lucky commoner’s child that happened to catch your father’s eye. Perhaps, to her, it is everything, but not you. 

You’d sooner marry for love than find yourself in a loveless, arranged marriage for the sake of your family name and nothing else. 

“Ladies.” While your friend has been harrumphing and grumping about his arrival, he’s clearly been making his rounds, finally finding himself at your side. You turn to him with a gentle smile, though your friend's politeness is clearly forced. “I hope I’m not interrupting anything,” he says, his voice lilting with a slight accent. 

“Well⁠—” 

“Of course not,” you’re quick to insist. You hear your friend huff at your side but you’re looking at the man before you, who smiles back at you. “Lovely to see you again, Lord Yang. How have you been?” 

“Quite well, thank you for asking. Kept busy,” he says, brushing a stray piece of hair out of his eyes. Your eyes follow the trail of his white gloved hands from his side to his hair and back down to his side. “And yourself, Miss?” He asks, which brings your attention back up to his face. Just the corner of his lips tilts upward in a sharp little smile, causing a dimple to appear in his cheek. 

“Well enough,” you reply and he lifts a brow. “Much to attend this season. I’ve been kept plenty busy with the various garden parties and balls that the noble are known to throw. I’m sure you’re much the same.” 

“Not nearly as well invited as you are, it seems,” he comments, grinning at you. “I suppose a lovely woman such as yourself must spend quite a bit of time with handsome suitors. Just as well, I heard you’re looking to be married.” 

“Not so soon,” you laugh off, shaking your head. “My friends are more the marrying types,” you say, looking over at your friend, who huffs but has a rather pleased smile hovering around her lips. 

“Ah, right. You’re betrothed to Lord Erikson, if I’m correct,” Jungwon says, turning to your friend. Her smile turns from forced to downright pleasured as she turns to face him fully, face half covered by her fan. She’s a taken woman, nothing pleases her more than being able to talk about it. 

“That is correct,” she lays on. 

The moment her awaiting marriage is mentioned, you’re left to do nothing else but stand by and listen to her regale Lord Jungwon Yang with all the glorious details of her upcoming marriage, the wedding, the manor she’ll be living in, everything bright and sparkling about being a bride-to-be. You’ve been listening to it for ages but Jungwon is a fresh set of ears to be forced to hear about it so you stand idly by, thankful to have Jungwon at your side because at least it’s a temporary shield against the many men who can’t seem to take a hint. 

Temporary is the problem, however. 

“Lady Y/L/N,” a gentleman says, coming to your side while Jungwon is being enthralled (unlikely) with the wedding plans of your school friend. You turn slowly towards him, forcing a smile to the surface despite how little you’d like to. “I understand you came to this event unattended. Might as well be a crime, a lovely woman such as yourself being left to fend for herself.” You blink at him slowly, lifting your fan towards your face. “If you’d like, I’d be more than willing⁠—” 

“I believe you got the wrong idea,” Jungwon says. You turn abruptly to him, your friend cutting herself off as soon as the words leave Jungwon’s mouth. He turns to the man at your side, tilting his head. “I don’t know quite know how as I’ve been standing here this whole time, but I assure you, Lady Y/L/N is quite well attended to for this event.” The suitor standing beside you blinks at him, stunned. “If you’d like to dance with her, you might think to ask the man attending to her, don’t you suppose?” 

“I wasn’t aware⁠—” 

“I didn’t think so,” Jungwon says. “You made that quite clear.”

The suitor clears his throat awkwardly, bending slightly at the waist in a bow to Jungwon and then straightens back up to ask, “if I may ask her hand for a dance? It would please me greatly.” He’s turned slightly to you, however, an obvious disregard for Jungwon’s opinion. You hide a smirk behind your fan, eyes downcast. 

“I’m afraid I was about to ask her to dance,” Jungwon informs him. The man turns back to Jungwon, startled by his boldness. “Thank you for your interest though.” The suitor turns to you, as though you’re going to rebuke Jungwon’s claim but you simply turn towards Jungwon. 

“You were?” You ask, tilting your head at him, lowering your fan a bit so he can see more of your face. 

“I was. It would’ve been terribly rude to interrupt your friend while she was speaking though.” He turns back to your friend, who is wearing a truly flabbergasted expression, having witnessed the entire exchange between the three of you. “I apologize for my rudeness, miss.” He bows slightly to her in apology. “You won’t mind if I take her hand in a dance though, would you?” He asks. 

“No,” she says, clearly too startled to deny him. 

“Wonderful.” Jungwon offers his hand to you. “Shall we?” 

You slide your gloved hand into his, feeling the heat of his hand in your own. Silently, you wish neither of you were wearing gloves so you could feel the full warmth of his palm against yours. This will have to do for now though as he leads you out onto the dance floor, your fan folded and hanging from your opposite wrist. 

It’s only once you’re on the dance floor, the bricked path beneath your feet, that Jungwon speaks again. 

“I apologize,” he whispers to you. You look at him to see him already looking at you. His gaze is gentle, staring at you with a kindness you’ve yet to see from the many suitors that have tried to take your hand before him. “I’m not usually so forward but, you see, I’ve waited all season to ask you to dance.” You blink at him, taken aback by his confession. “I’m not often invited to events like these so I had to seize my chance when it presented itself. I hope you weren’t too startled or offended.” 

“On the contrary, I was very impressed,” you inform him. A smile creeps its way across his lips again. “Not many men have the boldness that you do. Most men wouldn’t do such a thing for my attention. I am, after all, not that desirable.” 

“I don’t think you understand what that word means if you think that,” Jungwon retorts. “I’m afraid I’ve been working very hard to make my way through the crowds of men seeking your attention all season long.” You giggle, bringing your hand down from his shoulder to cover your mouth. “I know I’m not quite the man your family would prefer⁠—” 

“You’re a good man, Jungwon,” you interrupt him. His eyes widen in surprise at your bold statement. You feel warm with embarrassment at stating something so abruptly and interrupting him in the process. You cover your mouth with your hand again. “Oh, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have⁠—” 

“Thank you,” he tells you. Your embarrassment dies down at his words and you look at him from under your lashes. “Not many people would say that to me.” 

“You shouldn’t listen to what other people think,” you tell him, resting your hand on his shoulder again. The hand on your waist tightens just a bit, pulling you the tiniest bit closer to him. It’s not unseemly, not yet, but your bust brushes the front of his suit jacket. The heat of him is close, his face just inches from your own. You truly think you could get lost in the depths of his dark brown eyes, even deeper and darker than the tea your mother makes in the winter months, yet twice as warm. 

“I’ll take that into consideration.” 

Though you hadn’t thought about it before, the longer you remain in Jungwon’s company the more you grow to like him. He’s sweet to you, kind and speaks with a gentle tongue. While others might find his lilting foreign accent distracting or uncouth, you don’t. It’s sort of handsome to you and when you’re done dancing, you spend the rest of the party in his presence. No one else approaches the two of you, after Jungwon’s abrupt and firm rebuke of the first suitor’s interruption, your hand wrapped around his bicep. You find his attention sort of all consuming, in the best way, the adoration in his eyes and the soft way in which he regards you. It’s enough that you sometimes find yourself hiding behind your fan to keep your composure. To say you’re taken with him would be an understatement for certain, assuring him on his parting that you want to see him at the next event you both will be attending. 

“I look forward to it,” he tells you, taking your hand in his. He bends at the waist, bringing your hand to his lips to gently kiss the back of it. Oh how you wish you weren’t wearing gloves, the mere thought of the soft touch of his lips to the back of your hand is enough to leave your heart racing. 

Others, however, don’t feel the same. 

“Do you think this is a joke? This isn’t just your life we’re talking about here!” Your mother explodes as you’re being fitted for a new gown. The poor seamstress that’s fitting your skirts around your waist is being forced to bear witness to the verbal lashing you’re receiving from your mother. You’re quite used to it though, keeping your composure as she speaks. “Do you have any idea what kind of scar you would put on your father’s name if you were to entertain such a man? I won’t have it!” 

“You don’t even know him,” you say, voice measured. 

“I don’t have to! You’ll not be wasting your time with some low life trader’s son!” She insists. 

“He’s a doctor,” you inform her, turning your head to look at her. She scoffs, arms crossed over her chest. “He’s gone to school and everything. Has his own practice. He’s a good man, with a good standing. Just because his father is a trader doesn’t mean he’s the same. He’s made something of himself!” 

“Made something!? He’s an Oriental, he’ll never make something of himself, Y/N, don’t be naive. He’s no more a doctor than that Chinese medical man who sells herbs on the street. You’re not to be mingling with the likes of him,” your mother warns you. “Do you have any idea the kinds of things people would say about you if you were to court him?” She asks, walking around to stand in front of you. You huff to yourself, not meeting her eye. “The kinds of things they would say about me, or your father, if you married someone like that?! I won’t have it. You have a reputation to uphold.” 

“You think he couldn’t carry father’s name?” You retort. 

“I’d hope the good Lord would strike me where I stand before I let something like that happen,” your mothers tells you. “Now you listen to me, you are not to be seen with him anymore. He is not going to court you and he is not going to attend you to any further events, do you understand?” You bring your gaze down to meet hers. “I don’t want you to even go near him. Don’t let him get any ideas. Do you understand me?” 

“Yes, ma’am,” you sigh. 

You knew this might happen. Your family has some very old fashioned ideas, your parents especially, and the idea that you might let someone like Jungwon attend to you, of course your mother couldn’t stand it. As stated, your reputation is everything to her, especially yours. She expects you to marry up, not down. Of course a simple man with a good job isn’t enough for her, he needs to be noble, of high class. Jungwon will never measure up to her. 

The next party you attend, you keep to yourself, eyes down, fan in front of your face. The heat is unbearable, so surely no one can blame you for the way you keep your fan close and up, keeping yourself covered. You don’t even dance, sitting away from the festivities, allowing the chatter of late season weddings, births and birthday parties wash over you. 

You glance up when a murmur runs through the crowd, an hour past the beginning of the party, just in time to see Jungwon enter the gardens. He’s dressed just as impeccably as before, though his suit is brown rather than grey. Still, you doubt he could ever look poorly, his handsomeness speaks for itself. You sigh to yourself, standing and walking away from the table. 

Perhaps it’s all a bit juvenile but the idea of being away from him is easier than trying to ignore him. After all, you can’t stop your feelings any more than you can stop your heart from beating. It’s all so sudden and yet, with one longing gaze, it’s all you can do to not ask Jungwon to ask for your hand right then and there. He’s a gentleman so he won’t, he’ll do whatever it takes, even if it means flowers and dancing and courting and admiration from afar until it’s socially acceptable to ask you to marry him. But you wish he wouldn’t, you wish he would just cut the chase. 

You’ve never cared for men who waste time. 

Hedge gardens are all a bit trite to you, but they’re fine places to think. Especially since no one will come looking for you, you can even go alone. So you do, finding yourself wandering through the thick maze of tall hedges, bright green and reaching above you, almost like trees. You fan yourself, glancing up at the unbearable sun, hoping for the day the air becomes crisp with the autumn wind and you can wrap yourself in shawls instead of sweating under your many skirts. You wonder if there’s a place where it’s like autumn all the time, if you could hope to live someplace like that. Someplace away from this, all of this meaningless nonsense regarding class and reputation. 

“I thought I might find you here,” someone says and you turn, finding Jungwon walking up behind you. He’s still a few paces away, a respectful distance between the two of you, especially since you’re alone here. “When I saw you leave, I worried I’d done something. But we’ve not even spoken since our last outing.” He stops a few feet from you and you lower your fan with a sigh. “Maybe that’s the problem. Should I have chased after you, sending you love letters and words of admiration so that you might miss me more?” He’s teasing you, you know it, but it makes you frown anyway. “What have I done?” He asks, moving to close the distance. 

When he steps forward, you step back, causing him to stop in his tracks. 

“I’m sure I don’t need to tell you,” you say and his expression drops into one of confusion and worry. “I think it would be best if you attended to someone else this summer.” 

“I don’t want to attend to anyone else this summer,” Jungwon informs you. “I thought you wouldn’t want me to,” he adds, walking towards you again. You stumble backwards, only to bump directly into a hedge, causing you to stop. You glance at it, betrayed by your own clumsiness, and then look back at him. He closes the distance until he’s only a foot or so in front of you. “Have you changed your mind?” 

“I…” He tilts his head at you, “have. Yes.” 

“I see,” he sighs. “Well, I apologize for wasting your time.” Your frown at him, hurt. “I hope you find whatever it is you’re looking for.” He takes your hand gently in his, bending at the waist and kissing the back of your hand again. Your heart flutters like it did before, Jungwon lifting his gaze to look at you from under his lashes. “Have a lovely summer, Lady Y/L/N.” 

You sigh softly as he lets go of your hand. He leaves you, walking back out of the hedge maze and, presumably, back to the party. You huff to yourself, turning your fan over between your hands, despondent. 

Your mother, as expected, is nothing less than thrilled when you tell her about the exchange. 

“Well, I should hope so,” she says, enjoying her tea in the garden, fanning herself. “That young man is finally learning his place.” 

“I suppose he is,” you mutter to yourself, staring down at your hands. 

That evening the night falls, dark but illuminated by a silver, full moon. You dress down into your nightgown, the late summer turning into autumn as soon as the sun goes down. You find yourself wrapped in a long housecoat, shuffling to the window in your slippers. You open the window, leaning out to let the crisp night air caress your skin. Though the courting season might be ending, perhaps you will finally find solace once more in the quiet days and cold nights. It’s the least you can hope for. 

You’re startled by the sound of rustling. You look out towards your garden wall, nervous of what might be happening. The leaves on the ivy that drapes down the sides of the wall shiver and rustle in the night air but it sounds heavier and heavier the longer it goes on. You lean out over your window sill, watching out for what might be causing such a ruckus at such a late hour. 

He appears over the top of the garden wall, heaving himself up and over the top. Your mouth drops open with a gasp when the moonlight illuminates his features, making his wide eyes seem even darker, his smirk coming into focus. Jungwon sits on the edge of the garden wall, suit jacket and waistcoat gone, tie missing and first few buttons undone like some kind of rascal from your romance novels. He looks up at you, hands on the top of the wall. 

“Rapunzel, Rapunzel,” he calls out, making you laugh and shake your head at him. 

“You shouldn’t be here!” You insist, trying to keep your voice down but still trying to make sure he can hear you. 

“I shan’t go until you speak with me. A young man’s heart is nothing to toy with, princess,” Jungwon tells you. You lean against the window frame, smiling sadly. “Come to my side, tell me your woes. I’ll do whatever I can to ease them.” 

“I assure you, you cannot,” you sigh. His expression softens as he looks up at you. “It is not your heart that is being toyed with, prince charming. I assure you.” 

“A princess’ heart is not one for games, of this I’m sure,” he replies. “Come down from your ivory tower so that I may offer you solace.” 

It’s a tempting offer. You glance back at your bedroom door, knowing well your parents must be asleep by now. Only your bedside lamp burns in the entire house. You turn back to him, Jungwon looking up at you with hopeful eyes. After this afternoon, his bright eyes make you ache for his side once more. You can’t help but notice he’s without his gloves, dressed down in what is surely an unseemly way, you are as well. Yet you long for the touch of his bare skin against yours, even if it’s just his palm clasped in your hand. 

“Will it be in your arms?” You ask.

“I desire nothing less,” Jungwon says, voice aching with conviction. You smile, reaching out to close your window. 

You snuff out your lamp as quickly as you can, then gently open your bedroom door. You must creep, as silently as you can, from your bedroom to the first floor, then make your way through the estate to the doors to the back garden. When you get there, you carefully ease that door open as well, closing it with a soft hand. You rush out into the middle of the garden, still dressed only in your housecoat and nightgown, looking for him.

“Was it my arms you wish to find solace in?” A voice speaks from the darkness and you turn towards it. Jungwon walks towards you, hands in his pockets. You rush towards him, his hands leaving his pockets so he can catch you when you run into his chest, your arms wrapping around his neck. Jungwon bundles you into his arms, holding you against him.

It’s the first time he’s ever held you, but you sink into the feeling of his strong arms wrapped around your body, the weight of him against you, the warmth of him seeping into you. You rest your cheek against his shoulder, hugging him to you. If this is the only time you’ll be able to do this, you’ll not forget it for the rest of your life. 

“So you haven’t changed your mind,” he whispers into your hair. You pull back to meet his gaze. “You never did. Did you?” 

“No,” you whisper. “My mother⁠—” 

“She doesn’t approve,” Jungwon says. You nod slowly. “Well, I can’t say I’m surprised. A woman such as yourself isn’t meant to marry beneath her, after all.” You frown at him. “I’m not worth much to them. I’m just a trader’s son⁠—” 

“Your status doesn’t mean anything to me. Marrying someone for status is useless. What about love?” You reply and his expression turns soft. “What about marrying someone because you love them? Because they make you feel happy and full and good in their presence? What about that?”

“Women like you aren’t supposed to yearn for love,” Jungwon says, lifting a hand to your cheek. “Love won’t bring you things you most desire.” 

“If love is not what I most desire when you do not understand what that word means,” you reply. He smiles at you, stroking his thumb over your cheek. 

“Run away with me?” He asks. 

“So suddenly?” You reply, staring up at him. “What if you grow bored of me?” 

“Do you think I’m the type to grow bored of people easily?” Jungwon asks. “I assure you I’m not.” 

“Of people? No. Of lovers? Perhaps,” you reply. His eyes widen, a smirk making its way across his lips. “You don’t see me as a temporary lover, do you?” 

His lips press to yours suddenly. It’s like he’s taken the breath from your lungs, your body paralyzed in his hold. His fingers hold you gently in place with a tenderness you’ve never experienced, your arms wrapping around his neck tighter once more. Jungwon’s hand guides you to tilt your head, his opposite arm wrapping tightly around your waist. 

You’re not courting, he’s not even attended you more than once, but you grip at his shirt, holding him tightly against your body, chasing the feeling of his mouth against yours. It’s an earth shattering kiss, one that makes it feel as though the entire world has melted away underneath your feet. Your knees are weak but he holds you up, keeping your body pressed against his own. He kisses you with a recklessness you have never known, a passion that makes you feel dizzy and lightheaded when he pulls away from you. 

“I’ve never had a lover before you,” he confesses, “and I don’t plan on ever having another after you.”

a/n: sometimes, it's about the ✨ romance ✨ it's about the longing, the yearning. that's what it's all about this time, baby. hope you enjoyed 💕

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https://gofund.me/0974b65e

Sharing to spread the message ^^

When will Beshit- I mean, Belift, stop setting Enha up. Like wdym u r collabing with McDonald's in Japan.

I am aware that Japan McDonald's may not support or fund Israhell, but that global + American Brand is still being promoted, that video is available for EVERYONE to see.

And I just know that Riki will either get massive amnt of hate for smth his stupid ass company made him do, or his company may acc protect their artists (and we know how that goes). Obviously, it doesn't excuse the fact that Riki was in the promo video, but all I can say is that ppl should not hate on Riki, rather they should take account of BELIFT without insulting riki's entire existence and explain why this is problematic. That's the best way to raise attention. And this is not just for Riki, but also for other groups that have to promote these shitty ass companies bc their company said so.

Riki has already got sm unnecessary hate before, and if he gets it again bc people are not taking account of the situation in a proper manner (as in, they are hating and bashing Riki), or if Belift doesn't protect their artists and deal with their shit, I will burn the building down myself

Heaven Couldn't Wait For You

「pairings」 : ot7 enha x fem!reader 「word count」 : 2.6k (300-400 ea. member)

「synopsis」 : the enhypen members as "I still..." prompts after you've passed away.

「genre」 : angst, angst, and more angst

「warnings」 : mentions of death, slight cussing, mentions of mental health (break downs, depression, guilt, etc...), crying... lots and lots of crying, alcohol consumption, kissing in some, lmk if I missed anything!

「notes」 : I would like to give my deepest and sincerest apologies bc I have absolutely no clue why I have decided to do this to myself much less you guys :') I already know I'm gonna have a few oomfs yelling at me in the gcs.... I hope y'all enjoy this nonetheless!

HEESEUNG ━

I still listen to your old voice messages because I’m scared I’ll forget the sound of your voice

"Hi baby, I'm sure you're busy with work, but I just wanted to let you know that I got off early and was going to pick up dinner. So just let me know if there's anything you'd like! I love you!"

Heeseung sat in his desk chair, staring blankly at the wall. The sound of your voice is the only sound in the room. Tears stained his pale cheeks, having done cried all of the tears he could and was now just left with a numbing feeling.

The clicking sound of the voicemail end caused him to tear his eyes away from the blank wall and click on the one right below it. Leaning back in the chair, he listened to your voice once more, his heart breaking even more, knowing he wouldn't ever be able to hear it again.

"Happy birthday, my love! I'm sorry I couldn't be there in person to celebrate with you, but I'll be home tonight, so just wait for me, ya? I have to go; I love you so much, Heeseung."

His jaw clenched, trying to keep the tears that were pulling in his at bay, but he failed as soon as the room fell silent. An emptiness filled the room, the weight of it all crushing Heeseung's soul.

A knock at the door caused the tall male to whip around, wiping his face of any stray tears. Jay cracked open the door, peeking his head in, worried about his roommate.

A sigh broke through his lips at Heeseung's disheveled appearance. Pushing the door open further, he stood in the doorway, taking in the state of his room. It was clean—maybe a little too clean. Then he noticed the phone propped up on his desk.

"It's been six months Hee, you're just hurting yourself." Jay hated seeing his best friend like this, so broken, so numb, so lost.

Heeseung sniffed, wiping his nose and meeting Jay's eyes, "I know, but I'm scared I'll forget what her voice sounds like."

JONGSEONG ━

I still smell the traces of you everywhere; my bed sheets, my pillowcases, our hoodie

Jay sat in the middle of his bed; the only source of light that filled the room was from the TV that was playing a random show. Tears silently flowed from his chocolate orbs as he held the fabric of your hoodie in his hands. The sweet smell of your perfume was still present in the fabric, only causing more tears to flow from his eyes, his longing growing tenfold.

His appearance was a mess, just like his room. The once neat and tight space was nowhere near as organized as it once was. Clothes were thrown about the floor, used cups sat on his nightstand, and half-eaten meals lay in the trash can.

It had only been a few days since your funeral, but with each passing day without you felt like a stab to his heart. That pain only grew more when he found his favorite hoodie stuffed at the top of the closet, the scent of your perfume washing over him as soon as he held it in his hands.

“Why did you have to leave me?” He sobbed into the fabric as he brought it to his face, laying down in the very bed that the two of you had shared for years. Your scent surrounds him because even months after you have left, everything around him still smells so much like you. Reminding him once more that you were gone.

Before too long, Jay’s cries died down, exhaustion finally taking over his body from not sleeping for so long. His eyes closed tightly, eyelashes decorated with teardrops, and his lips parted slightly as he breathed softly. His face was buried in the fabric of his pillowcase, the lingering scent of your shampoo is the only thing that let him sleep peacefully. However, the hoodie that was sitting in his hands was clenched tightly to his chest, a fear that he would wake up and it wouldn’t be there pooling in his gut. The last thing he wanted was for your scent to disappear from the article of clothing, scared that maybe one day he’d forget your scent entirely.

JAEYUN ━

I still text your number even though I know you won’t ever respond

Jake sat around the table with all of his friends, drinking yet another beer. He had a wide smile on his face as everyone congratulated him once more. He had just gotten a huge promotion at work and aced a big test at school. It felt as if everything was going good for once in over a year.

Many drinks later, Jake was singing along with Sunghoon. Everyone watched with a smile, even if they weren’t singing the words correctly. Then, just like that, he remembered you, forgetting that he hadn’t gotten the chance to tell you about all of the good news that he had received.

Sitting back down in his seat with an excited smile, he grabbed his phone, opened the device, and went straight to your contact. He didn’t pay any mind to the multiple unanswered messages from many, many other times. He typed up a message, not caring to double-check for any grammar or spelling mistakes. After all, you wouldn’t mind. You never did.

Heeseung stopped mid-drink once he noticed Jake’s actions, his smile dropping slightly, already knowing what the boy was doing. Jay and Sunoo weren’t too far behind him, a pitiful look crossing both of their faces.

Noticing how quiet it went, Jake looked up from the device in his hand after hitting send. His smile dropped once he saw the looks of pity that he was getting, his heart lurching as his facade was slowly starting to crumble.

“I know she’s not going to answer, but–” he hiccuped, tears starting to brim in his eyes, “but she deserves to know.” His bottom lip trembled slightly as he looked down at his phone, his lock screen showing. A picture of you and him on the very last date the two of you went on.

“She’s proud of you, man,” Heeseung said with a sad smile to the brunette, who nodded softly, wiping his face clear of the tears that had broken free.

He knew that you were watching over him, knew that even from far away, you were still cheering him on. That’s what he used as motivation to continue in life, wanting nothing more than to make you proud.

SUNGHOON ━

I still go to our favorite spot whenever I’m missing you because I feel like you’re there with me

Sunghoon sat on the damp grass, not caring at all that his jeans were soaking wet. His hands shoved in the pockets of his hoodie, and he looked out at the stars shining over the silent city. The crisp winter air turned his cheeks and the tip of his nose a rosy shade of red. Each puff of air outlined the night, barely illuminated by the moonlight.

He closed his eyes, soaking in the sounds of the crickets around him, the sound bringing him a sense of calmness. Just then, a gust of cool air washed over his body, making him shiver. Curling his knees closer to his chest to try and save some body heat, he shivered.

“I know you’re probably scolding me for not bringing a coat.” He chuckled softly, tilting his head up to gaze upon the moon once more. His fingers started to grow numb, even in the protection of his pockets. He tried to smile, not wanting you to see him upset, but the memories of the dates that the two of you shared flashed in his mind, and tears welled up in his eyes. “I miss you so much.” His voice shook, fingers curling up into a fist.

Another gust of wind blew over him, except this time, it felt warmer. A feeling that diminished the barrier that held his tears. Soft sobs racked through his body as he buried his face in his knees at the thought of you possibly being there with him, telling him that it was going to be okay.

“It’s been a year, and it still hurts so much,” he cried out, pulling his tear-stained face from his knees to look up at the sky once more, his eyes finding the brightest star in the sky. I’m so sorry I couldn’t protect you, my love.”

Pain shot through every fiber of his body as he sat on the damp grass, wishing that you were with him. Watching you point out all of the constellations that you could see in the night sky, laughing whenever he would make up a random name for a shape he made.

It had been a year without you, but yet it felt like just yesterday that he had lost you.

SUNOO ━

I still have all of the little notes you used to write to me in my closet

Sunoo wiped the tears from his face once more as he pulled the lid off of the cutely decorated box. One that you decorated yourself for him to hold a birthday gift, but Sunoo thought it was far too cute to just throw out afterward. So he kept it and used it as a safekeeping for all of the little notes that you used to write him.

Sniffing softly, he sat the lid off to the side and looked inside, seeing all of the colored papers that lay inside. He contemplated on even reading them, scared that he would break down once again, but his hands seemed to be working faster than his mind. His fingertips brushed over a small blue paper, grabbing it softly before unfolding it. More tears spilled from his bloodshot eyes as he read the words that were written in your pretty handwriting.

‘Every day, I am reminded of how lucky I am to have you in my life.’

Then, just like that, he found himself grabbing the pages piece by piece, reading every note no matter how big or small it was. Even as tears blurred his vision, he still read all of your words, recalling some of the memories that they brought back with them. How you would always try to discreetly hide the note somewhere you knew he would look, always waiting for the smile that would spread on his face whenever he would read it before walking over to you, kissing you sweetly as thanks, but now he could only hope that you hear his thanks as he read them over and over.

Grabbing another, he felt his heart lurch into his throat, a choked cry pulling from his swollen lips as he read the words written on the pretty pink page.

‘You bring out the best in me, and I will forever be thankful for that.’

He wrapped his fingers softly around the page, scared that he would crumble it entirely as he tilted his head back, tears spilling from the corner of his eyes. Letting out a shaky breath, he opened his mouth, words tumbling out before he could even fully process them.

“You brought out the best in me, too, my love, and I’m so sorry I could not protect you when you needed me.”

JUNGWON ━

I still hear the sounds of you singing in the shower like you were in your own concert

Jungwon sat on the floor of the shower, the now cold water washing over his body as he hugged his knees to his chest. The soft sounds of your favorite playlist playing through the speakers of his phone that sat on the ground right outside of the shower.

Tears spilled from his eyes, blending with the water that washed over his head, dripping from the ends of his hair. His clothes, which were still on his body, were now completely soaked through, clinging to his body. He was sure that he would fall sick after sitting under the cool water for so long, but he couldn’t find it in himself to get up. The chill of the water behind was the only thing to numb the pain that coursed through his veins.

The memories of him sitting on the counter while you were in the shower, just singing your heart out as if no one in the world could hear you. Your voice was sweet like honey, always pulling a smile to his face any time he heard you from the bedroom. He recalled all of the times that he told you that you could become a singer with vocals like that, but you always told him that you were far too shy to even think about trying to go down that path.

“It’s okay, I’m the only audience you need anyways.” He would always tell you, wrapping his arms around your body and peppering your face with kisses until you both fell into a fit of giggles.

Just then, a song played that made his whole body tense, the very first song that the two of you bonded over. The very song that you had proclaimed to be your guys' couple song. The very song that Jungwon told himself that he would never listen to again after hearing it at your funeral.

Sobs racked his body as a string of apologies fell from his lips, his nails digging into his calf, trying to ground himself. He listened to the song, remembering your sweet voice singing it so loudly until, eventually, the playlist stopped, and he had to pull his frigid body from the shower floor.

NI-KI ━

I still remember all of our late-night talks when we’d make plans for our future

Riki sat on the ground in front of his bed, a notebook sitting idly in his hands as he fought the urge to cry. Reading the words that were written on the pages made his heart hurt, but seeing that it was your handwriting completely shattered his soul.

He read all of your thoughts and notes that you were sure that no one else would see, as well as the little doodles that decorated the edges. Your mother had just given him the notebook, telling him that you wanted him to have it if anything were to happen. As if you knew that you weren’t going to be in the world for much longer.

Tears started to silently stream down his cheeks as he turned the page reading the words, the words expressing how much you love sitting with him late at night, talking about your lives. Planning your future together. He hated that you wouldn’t be able to do that anymore, nor would he ever get the chance to live out those plans that the two of you had made.

“You’re such a liar.” He choked out between sobs as he read all of your words that were scribbled on the page, tears blurring the letters, melting them all together as he cried. Sorrow and longing coursed through his veins because as much as he wanted to be angry at you for leaving him, he just couldn’t.

Tears dropped down from his lashes to wet the pages, smudging the ink under his fingers when he tried to wipe it away. His heart shattered even further the more he read, knowing that you had so many things that you wanted to try, so many places that you wanted to go, and so many people that you wanted to meet. All of these things you wanted to do with him.

Just as he was about to close the book, bile creeping up the lining of his throat as the reality of you not coming back settled in his mind. But then he saw something on one last page, words causing a choked sob to tear from his lungs, fingers gripping the edges of the paper so tight that it was a miracle that it didn’t rip.

‘To my beloved Riki, promise me that if I one day have to leave this earth that you still follow our plans. I love you, and I’m sorry I can’t be there with you as you continue your journey in life.’

@alvojake | Do not steal, plagiarise, translate, or repost any of my work

𝖉𝖎𝖘𝖈𝖑𝖆𝖎𝖒𝖊𝖗 : ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ɴᴏ ᴡᴀʏ ᴀ ᴛʀᴜᴇ ʀᴇᴘʀᴇꜱᴇɴᴛᴀᴛɪᴏɴ ᴏꜰ ᴀɴʏ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀꜱ. ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ᴘᴜʀᴇʟʏ ꜰɪᴄᴛɪᴏɴ ᴀɴᴅ ꜰᴏʀ ᴛʜᴇ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏᴍᴇɴᴛ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴏᴛ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ᴛᴀᴋᴇɴ ꜱᴇʀɪᴏᴜꜱʟʏ.

SWEET LATTE

PAIRING non idols yang jungwon x fem reader

WARNINGS none

GENRE fluff

SYNOPSIS you and jungwon decide to get a cat. and he loves it more than he’d admit.

despite the two of you being incredibly allergic, you somehow managed to convince jungwon to let you get a cat, since maeum has been with his parents.

so you did. you brought it home. but now you were clueless on what to do, since you both were dog people.

“is it.. dead?” he asked, gently poking the chubby kitten.

“no wonnie, it’s not dead! he’s just sleeping!” you swatted his hand away before scooping up the kitty and holding it in your arms.

as soon as your new pet felt it being lifted off the surface, he immediately woke up, snuggling closer into your grasp. holding the cat out to your boyfriend, he hesitated to pet it, you literally had to bring his hand up for him.

but as soon as jungwon made contact with the cat, “achoo!” he sneezed out loud.

“this was a terrible idea.” he sniffled, wiping his nose with a tissue.

“well you’re gonna have to watch him when i go to the office in.. an hour.” you informed, checking your phone for the time.

“what? you’re working today? i can’t take care of it alone!”

you shrugged in response, before turning back to the kitty in your arms. “you’re so cute!” you cooed. “i’m gonna name you latte!” and immediately, you continuously pecked the top of latte’s head as he purred.

“latte? really? that’s so basic.” jungwon grimaced as he looked at the little beige cat. it was a scottish fold with white spots. “i know it’s basic, but i can’t resist! he’s just the sweetest thing ever.”

“am i no longer your favorite sweet thing?” he joked, playfully pouting as you placed latte in his arms.

“the sweetest,” you gave him a long kiss on the lips before pulling away. “so don’t be like that. i’m gonna go get ready now.” you smiled.

“what am i gonna do with you?” jungwon sighed, staring at latte as he crawled across the couch when they finally sat back down.

by the time you came home, you absolutely were not expecting the sight in front of you. hurrying to take a warm shower, you wrapped your hair in a towel before going to sit next to jungwon in the living room.

you laughed as your boyfriend dangled his keys above latte’s head, the cat reaching out it’s paws tirelessly.

you leaned into jungwon, laying your head on his shoulder as he continued to play with your new child.

“oh jungwon..” you gasped, using your hand to turn his head so he could face you. you examined his red face, his eyes puffy from his allergies.

“it’ll go away later. i took medicine.”

“guess you love him don’t you?” “of course.” he sighed.

“and latte is just so sweet isn’t he?”

“the sweetest.”

“i think he has your eyes.” you point out, comparing the two as you often switched your gaze. “he’s like our little baby.”

“you’re saying i’m a cat?” jungwon raised a brow.

“maybe. i’m also saying our future daughter would look a lot like you.” you shrugged.

“what?” his eyes widened, fully turning to you in shock, “you’d really be willing to start a family with me?”

“of course. i mean, not too soon obviously, we’re only 20. but in the future, i think we’d make really good parents.” you smiled.

jungwon’s heart swelled, and his face ran hot (not just as an allergic reaction).

“my heart is so full right now.” he sighed, taking one hand off the cat to hug your waist as you wrapped your arms around his bicep.

“you’d be a great mother, and a gorgeous wife. also, i totally think we’re gonna have a son.” he whispered.

“daughter.” “son.”

“if we have a son, we should name him-” “i am not naming my son after the cat.” jungwon mumbled.

“whatever.” you grumbled.

“anyway. i can’t believe we got to talk about all this because of a cat. i guess they really are lucky.” he chuckled, leaning further into you as you held him tighter.

“guess that makes you my lucky charm then, doesn’t it?”

“guess so..” jungwon licked his lips, before leaning his head down to kiss you softly.

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