I Write Fan Fix. And, As An Author, This Helps My Self Esteem A Lot. I'll Get Comments Sometimes That

I write Fan Fix. And, as an author, this helps my self esteem a lot. I'll get comments sometimes that will bring me down. I just want to add, If someone insults your FF writing, it's because they can't write themselves and are jealous of you. So, don't give them the satisfaction. Ignore that piece of crap and move to a higher level. One they won't reach

Side Note To Fan Fic Authors

Here’s the thing.

I read a lot of scripts.  A lot.  From professionals to aspiring writers to complete newbies.  Features and pilots.  Specs and treatments.

And 8 times out of 10 the fan fic that I’ve read over the last, oh, 15 years is leagues better than this stuff.  It’s more inspired.  It’s more compelling.  It’s genre bending and creative and heartfelt.  It’s well-paced and intense and funny and sexy and meaningful.  It’s smart and thoughtful and good.  It’s novel-quality.  Better than, sometimes.

Rare is the script I don’t want to put down, but how often have we stayed up until 3am to get to the last chapter of a 100k fic? And it’s not even a fan fic author’s day job.  This is what they do on the side.  In their spare time.  For free.

So my point is, fan fic authors, you’re good.  You’re good writers and great storytellers.  I know it doesn’t always feel like it, especially if you’re one of the authors who’s not a BNF and doesn’t get the notes/hits that a few do.  And  because some people still view fic as “not real writing.” You guys know the shit that gets made into movies.  You’re better than that.  So be better than that.  If writing is what you think want to do, then just know you’re already doing it.   You’ve already started.

And you’re more talented than you might think.

Happy Christmas my darling dears! If you don't celebrate, I wish you a fabulous day both today, tomorrow, and the rest of the year

This is going on my Resume under skills when I apply for a second job (because heaven forbid I work one job for a livable wage) :

I can till and plant a 1000 block wheat field in a cuboidal block game in two hours.

(said game being Minecraft)

I'm an introvert, but not really by choice. I love being around people (sometimes) and I love interacting with people (if the vibes are good). All good qualities. Qualities that I picked up and learned and nurtured. Out of everyone I currently know and talk to, I can confidently say that I am the most charismatic and could talk them in circles. It's cocky, but I'm sure I can back it up.

The problem, though, lies in the forced isolation. Quarantine was hell for a lot of people, but it got to me the worst in my family. I thrive off of talking to people. I match energy with the people I'm interacting with. Being stuck in a house with the same few people who share almost no interests with me nearly killed me. Quarantine was hell, but that's not where this starts.

Elementary school (as far back as I can remember) is where the forced isolation began. I didn't recognize it at the time. I just thought the people didn't like me! Sure, kids still played with me and let me play with them, but that was only if I asked them first.

It didn't get bad until middle school. Yes, I had a large group of people that I knew, but maybe 7-10 ever approached me first. Everyone else made me go to them unless they needed something from me. If I was needed, I was wanted. What a terrible lesson for a 12 y/o to learn.

So, I became useful. I didn't want to be alone, so I listened and watched. I came to know the names of every person in our grade, as well as a few in the older and younger grades, too. I listened to bits and pieces of their stories. If there was someone you wanted to find, I probably knew where they were.

High school is when I became much more outgoing. I found my passion for theatre and the performing arts in elementary, but high school was when I was allowed to colour outside the lines with that passion. I Met my closest friends in that Theatre classroom.

Of course, I still knew everyone's names and where the most likely place to find them was, but that didn't matter anymore. These people didn't want me for my usefulness. These guys wanted to be around me just for the sake of being around me! I think. I thought.

I like to listen, so people came to me when they wanted someone to listen. Sometimes they'd want advice, so I'd give it to them. Sometimes they wanted a biased answer to a question they had about themselves, so I'd give them one. Sometimes they Just needed to cry, so I let them cry.

People, I have found, love talking about what they love. My sister once spent three hours telling me the George Lucas canon of Star Wars. My dad has spent an equal amount of time talking about video games. My friends have all talked in avid detail about everything they've ever found interesting enough to look into. Is it too much to ask the same courtesy?

I once went on a two hour long explanation about an anime I fell in love with (KHR). I explained the story and the world and the characters and the power system as best I could because I fell in love with it and I wanted to share that love with my family. My mom didn't so much as look at me for that entire two hours. Neither did my sister. Neither did my friend. And when I bring up that same show? None of them can remember a single detail. Not even the title character's name.

A more recent example is from today. I found Journey to Bethlehem on the Musical Theatre side of TikTok and fell in love with the song. Further looking into it landed me with the trailer. I'm not a religious person, but I already can't wait to listen to the entire soundtrack and watch the movie. I showed my very religious mother the trailer and the song (Good To Be King) and all she said was "Hm.". I showed my dad the song, and he said that he liked the guy singing. I tried to talk to them both about how hard those high notes are for guys to sing, but neither even responded. I tried to show my sister the Song, but she just dismissed me, so I moved topics. I sent the link of Good TO Be King to my closest friends over an hour ago when most of them were on Discord and not a single person has said a thing about it.

I've tried talking to people about my special interests, but I'm dismissed or ignored every time and I'm getting fed up with it. I want to go on an hours long rant about One Piece or BSD or KHR or The Slayers or FMA/FMAB or Harry Potter (fanon) or LOTR or Bluey, but no one will listen!

I know my problems are small in the eyes of the world. I know that people don't see my problems as problems, but I do. I see them as problems. Do you want to know what my parents said when I spoke to them about this? "You're overthinking things."

This is why I don't talk to people anymore. This is why I'm an introvert. This is why I spend so much time keeping to myself.

I had to deal with questioning everything about myself alone because no one would listen to me. I came out as AroAce my senior year of highschool, and you wanna know the responses I've gotten?

Dad: "You just need to go to church more."

Mom, grandma, aunt: *completely ignored* *goes on to talk about me getting married and having kids*

My closest friends: "Which one? You can't be both." "You just haven't found the right person yet." "Once everyone is married, you'll want to get married, too. Then you'll start looking."

I've gone on for a while, but I need to get this stuff off my chest. I hate being forgotten. I've been forgotten about enough that I'm actually traumatized from it.

Anyone who read this whole thing, thanks. Anyone who sympathizes, thanks. Anyone who is going to tell me to suck it up or that my problems are nothing compared to yours, can go fvck themselves.

Now, if you'll excuse me-

Demeter has blessed us with a beautiful harvest this year or grapes and apples (this isn't all)

Randomness that has absolutely nothing to do with anything

I have a trash bag hanging on my doorknob, because I'm a procrastinator and I'm not cleaning my room, but my twin ister comes in and she's like "What the crap is on your door?" so I respond with "My soul." So, being the the 14 year old she is, she said "Well, your soul is trash."

We both broke out laughing for about 5 minutes.