Having A BAU Girls Night Out But With Luke Tagging Along For Scary Dog Privileges (even Though You Could

Having a BAU girls night out but with Luke tagging along for scary dog privileges (even though you could very well do anything you want yourself bc you're a literal federal agent)

girl i LOVE this idea, like luke would fucking LOVE to be the scary dog on a night-out, intimidating anyone in sight who was being creepy or weird. here's how a typical night with the women of the BAU (+luke) would probably go.

(below the cut)

so you all get to the bar as soon as you're off work, sometimes in uniform (which is literally just formal wear), sometimes you get a chance to change into something more comfortable but sluttish for the bar, really depends on the day

either way, luke is there and he sometimes wonders how he gets himself into these situations because being surrounded by his absolutely gorgeous drunk coworkers is just something he never really expects but he secretly loves it

you and the girlies all do rounds of drinks, cocktails for garcia, rum and coke (or whiskey) for emily, jj gets like either aperol spritzer, cocktails or like vodka with a mixer (orange or pineapple or cranberry juice) and tara gets either whiskey, like emily, or she gets like coke/lemonade with vodka, you get whatever your favourite is on the night and you obviously are all drinking

luke probably gets like a beer but doesn't tend to get too drunk unless it's a whole team outing (including matt, reid and rossi) so he has a few beers

the ladies quickly get smashed which leads to dancing, which leads to reader being incredibly touchy with everyone but especially luke which leads to him getting dragged to dance

he loves dancing (even if he'd never admit it) and he loved seeing you so care-free on a night out

the dancing then leads to men approaching the other girlies and jj is probably the first to make her way towards you and luke when men start being weird

this is quickly followed by garcia

they are both strong independent women, don't get me wrong, but jj especially avoids conflict when she can, so you will drag her into you and dance with her and with luke

the GLARE the luke gives the weird men would be enough for them to give up or scuttle off

jj is always thankful for luke in the mornings and always tells him as much, garcia is a little more on-and-off about it

you almost never leave luke's side so you're usually clear of the creeps

now as for the other girls, whenever weird men come around, tara and emily are the first willing to start a fight

this leads to luke diffusing which only pisses them off more and you or jj or garcia step in to diffuse further, the men always back off when another man comes and it makes emily and tara mad (so real)

but after that hiccup in the night, it usually goes back to normal, dancing, singing, drinking until you can barely walk because a release like a drunken night is seriously needed after a long day chasing criminals

also emily will occasionally spend an entire night drinking wine but it makes her a little too silly and gives her a raging headache in the morning so she generally avoids it

but all-in-all, everyone loves when luke comes and are thankful for the scary dog vibes that he gives off to people who are being weird

obviously, they wish things were different and also can and do take care of themselves whenever they got out alone but luke being there tends to make everyone feel safer

luke also just loves having free rein and permission to glare down any man who even dares go near any of the BAU women if they don't want it

he is aware that everyone can take care of themselves but after dealing with weird men who make him feel sick to his stomach most days, being able to protect his friends from those same kind of men does make him feel a little better

you also love when he protects everyone, you just think it's so sweet and you adore him for it

which is just another reason that you fall for him

im so mad, i finally fell asleep before 2an only to wake up now (4am) to some presumably drunken idiotic literally SCREAMING outside my apartment.

they are gone now but they interrupted a very nice dream not happy.

also like as far as i could tell (i was awake maybe a minute before the screaming began to get quieter as they walked away) nobody was hurt or anything, just a drunk guy being an asshole

i need a slutty man to help me stop thinking

Luke and reader being in love with each other but neither of them knowing it about the other even though they're really obvious about it. It's gotten to a point where even Roxy has decided that she has another parent and tends to listen to reader more than Luke

i saw this weeks ago and roxy would SO be like secretly trying to push them together. like the team but mainly roxy because i feel like despite being a very good dog, she is also an absolute fucking MENACE so please enjoy some thoughts on roxy being a little menace and pushing luke and reader together inspired by this ask (but i do go off topic whoops) hehe <3

(below the cut)

at first, you assumed that roxy liked you which is why she always rubbed against you or dragged luke over to you whenever she came in with him

luke assumed that she trusted you which he obviously saw as a good thing, he's had dogs not trust his past partners and those partners always turned out to be... kind of shitty? so he's glad that roxy likes you

then you start coming over to luke's apartment/house and roxy becomes even closer to you, rubbing against your leg, asking you for food, protecting you more than she really protected luke ESPECIALLY from any strangers that came to the door

roxy is well trained so she doesn't bark but she would always put herself in front of you if someone unfamiliar came to the door while you were over

it was always sweet, you found it incredibly endearing and it gave you even more of a reason to be around luke

luke was a fucking smokeshow, you were falling madly in love with him and his dog was a literal angel so it was just making your feelings even worse

you wished that you didn't feel that way since you were never really sure if luke felt the same but it didn't matter at the same time because luke was a comforting presence

but as you and luke got closer and spent more time with each other (and by extension, roxy), she started being a menace, the sweet doggo that you had known was replaced with a doggo who you were convinced was trying to out you

like sometimes you would be in the living room and you and luke are sat on the couch but with a seat between you, so when luke leaves the room to grab something from the kitchen and comes back, he finds that roxy has sat where he had previously which meant the two of you were sat beside each other

obviously you didn't care but he always seemed a little awkward when it happened, like he wasn't sure how to act

it was endearing and it made you love him even more

then sometimes when you were both in the kitchen, roxy would purposefully have you tripping over her so that luke would grab you/save you

and to make it even worse, sometimes she would only really listen to your commands, luke was a little offended by that fact but considering it was you, he was easily able to get over the initial offense

plus, how you acted around roxy and how sweet you were with her made him fall even harder for you

add on top of that how roxy seemed to constantly be pushing you two closer together, it was hard to ignore how much he adored your company

he couldn't escape you if he tried (and he was not complaining)

and it was roxy's interference which is the reason that the two of you confessed your feelings, it's just another reason that you love roxy

francesca by our lord and saviour hozier is seriously speaking to me tonight!

i'm so glad you loved it <333

and that's exactly what i was thinking for penelope! she's so excitable that i can just see it happening!

thank you for reading <33

Luke planning a romantic getaway for him and reader so they can have a nice relaxing weekend/week where he can do nothing but pamper reader like they deserve. (He plans it with the help of Penelope, Emily and JJ ofcourse)

okay, i have been thinking about this for a little while and the thought of this is so fucking cute to me, luke would absolutely do this and would literally bend heaven and earth to make it happen. here's some thoughts (no nsfw, just fluffy thoughts);

okay, like the original idea of a romantic getaway would probably be some like offhand comment made while you're working a case, like you mumble something 'god i need a vacation' or something and luke knows that he does too and wants to take you on one

at first, he doesn't think he's gonna be able to make it happen, at least not on his own, he doesn't know where to take you, what to do, any of it, he is a little stuck

everyone is staying late one night and garcia (bc she is nosy and we love her for it) spots luke looking at places that you and him could go stay

SHE BLOWS UP HIS PLANS SO BADLY and you obviously hear her asking what he is looking at and become suspicious

so his first attempt at a relaxing weekend away that was meant to be a surprise turns into both of you planning a little retreat for a long weekend in like upstate new york

it was a cute cottage in nature, away from people, it's nice, calming and you don't really have to worry about stumbling onto a case

but during the weekend you are stressed and mid-way through the getaway, you get a call for a case in new york city

so the relaxing and romancing quickly comes to an end, luke is frustrated but understands (it is both of your jobs after all)

BUT the second time that he plans a trip, he knows what to do, rather than trying to hide it from garcia, he ropes her in to help

garcia asks probing questions, looks at your search history (and she has also known you for years) and reluctantly helps luke with planning something

emily and jj quickly end up getting involved, he needs to ask emily for the time off anyway but when he is asking her about it, jj overhears and asks what he's planning, jj then begins to give ideas

and it quickly devolves into the women basically planning the week for both of you (tara included because ofc she overhears emily, jj and garcia discussing and wants in)

emily had approved the time off, she suggests places to go, luke kind of just sits there and approves any ideas or disproves anything that he knows that you would hate and he is obviously excited, he's also glad for the help

his vacation committee decided on you guys going to california and visiting the vineyards because you always talked about going to italy

however with the job, europe was a little too far away (and expensive on short notice) so the californian vineyards at the closest that they've got

emily has some friends in california that help them find a good place

garcia also has family there so reminds luke that if anything goes wrong, her siblings can help them, though she also reminds luke that she's only being so nice for you not him in typical garcia fashion

honestly, luke is just glad the surprise doesn't get ruined

and when you wake up on a monday, expecting to go to work but instead, luke presents you with the plane tickets, you are ecstatic

it is the first time you've been truly relaxed in WEEKS

the team did their best to make sure that you avoided any familiar haunts in california since both you and luke wanted a relaxing week and they only texted you if it's an emergency or if they just wanted to check in to make sure everything was going okay

and the week the two of you have away is amazing, you indulge in food (and each other) and for the first time in months, you feel truly relaxed

luke was always able to make you feel relaxed but this is another level

and when you come back from the trip (luke confesses that the team knew on the plane ride back home), you have a glow to you that they all point out and they giggle and you thank them all for helping plan such an amazing week, you just feel so grateful for them

luke (despite his lack of actual planning) also gets plenty of praise but you showed most of that to him while on the getaway ;)