Stay With Me, Please | Pt.2

stay with me, please | pt.2

warnings: mentions of SELF-HARM, talks about attempting SUICIDE, depression, language, angst, heartbreak

a/n: please do NOT read this if you are sensitive on the topics in listed above. I do not support the topics. if you feel alone, call the suicide prevention hotline: 1-800-273-8255. please remember that you are loved, and when times get tough, it’s just a rough patch in your life, but it’ll be over with soon. look on the bright side of things. treat yourself with love and care. i love you all ♡

*i personally have never had an experience on this topic, but a very close friend of mine has, she took therapy and is better than ever now. feel free to talk to me by clicking ‘ask me anything.’ i myself have suffered from depression. i tried to cut myself and was only able to cut my fingertip. i have a habit of not eating a lot of food and trying to stay quiet, not to attract attention to myself. nobody knows about it, not even my family or close friends. sometimes i feel alone in this world, but then i remember that there are people out there that love me. it’s hard, i know, but stay strong, my lovelies, i know it’ll get better. i will make a post just on this because i’ve typed too much of this on my lil’ fic here, which have more parts to come, so enjoy!*

masterlist

pt.1 | pt. 2

You awoke to the bright lights shining in your eyes. You tried to lift your arm to cover your eyes, but it didn’t work.

“Y/N! You’re awake!” Tom’s sounded tired.

You tried your hardest to turn your head to face him, but it didn’t work.

“Woah! Slow down, you haven’t healed yet. You’re still too weak. You’ll feel like you’re paralyzed only for an hour, so don’t worry. Here, let me help you.” His soft hands gently turn your head to face him.

He looks so tired like he hasn’t gotten any sleep. The dark under eye bags proving that he didn’t get any sleep. Tom was slouched over, gripping onto the hospital bed for support.

“Tom,” You were able to croak out, “Go sit down, you’re too weak. It’s okay.” He nodded his head and unsteadily walks back to the chair.

“Why?” Tom asked, sadness washing over his dull eyes.

“What?” You were confused.

“Why would you try to k-,” He struggled to get the word out. It was too painful to think about your limp body lying on the white tiled floor of the bathroom.

“Kill yourself,” He finally got it out. Tears started to fill his eyes.

I made him cry. I’m an idiot. I deserved to die. Why’d he have to save me? I’m just a waste of time.

“Please don’t cry, especially over me. I’m a waste of time, of effort.” You said quietly.

“No, you’re not! You aren’t a waste of time or effort! I love you! So fucking much as well! You don’t know how many people love you! Did you ever think about how the people around you would feel?! How I’d-,” He yelled, but you cut him off.

“You’re wasting your time yelling at me. Like I said if I had died, no one would have noticed and I would’ve been better off. You wouldn’t have to be here, wasting your breath. Look, Tom. You need to move on, to find someone better, like Zendaya. She’s so much better for you. It’s healthier for you to leave me,” You gave up on trying to speak loudly. Your voice was only a little over a whisper.

“No! You don’t get to choose what’s right for me! I love you, Y/N! You can’t just throw me away because you think you aren’t worth it! So listen up, I love you, and I won’t be leaving you anytime soon!” He demanded.

“If you won’t leave me, then I’ll have to leave you.” You sighed, trying your hardest to shake your head.

“No-,” you cut him off, “Tom, you can’t keep following after me, picking up all of my mishaps. You have to move on. I love you, and you mean the world to me, but it’s time that I go. So please, let go, I beg of you.” Tom’s eyes started to water, and his lips started to quiver.

Dammit, you made him cry, again.

“Please go, Thomas,” hearing you say his real name shocked him. He didn’t know what to do. You never said his real name, only Tommy, Tommo, Tom, and other nicknames.

“N-No, I can’t. I can’t,” he fell to his knees and started sobbing.

The tears rolled down his face rapidly as he kneeled there. His hands clenched into fists, continuously pounding the hospital floors.

The sound must’ve been heard by the doctor because the next thing you knew, they were standing at the door. They saw what was causing the noise, and you sympathetically looked over to the doctor, as if you were asking them to escort Tom out of the building. They nodded and continued onto their job. Somehow, the doctors were able to convince Tom to get up and exit your room.

You silently cried as you watched Tom get escorted out. You loved him. It was painful to let go of him, but you knew it was for the best. You couldn’t keep dragging him into your messes. Zendaya or any other girl would be better for him. You just hoped he would move on, and forget about you, completely.

“I love you, Tom,” you cried to yourself.

Tom couldn’t leave you. He stayed in the hospital waiting room, pacing back and forth. As the sunset, and more people started to leave, he sat down, sobbing his heart out.

Once Tom had calmed down, he walked back to your room, watching you sleep. You seemed so peaceful. He placed a hand on the glass, staring at you sympathetically.

“I love you, Y/N. I’ll do anything for you. Just please, please, live. Don’t try to go again. I’ll always be waiting for you, my love. Love, Tom.” He wrote on a sticky note, placing it right beside you on your tray.

The tears slipped down his face as he kissed your forehead, hoping it wouldn’t be the last time. He slowly walked out, relapsing all of the wonderful memories he shared with you.

Tom knew you guys were forever.

As the sun peaked through the hospital window, you were awoken by your doctor. They informed you that you could leave the hospital the next day. You were able to move on your own, now.

“Ms. L/N, you have a note,” your doctor handed you the small sticky note and left the room.

Puzzled, you read the note.

“Love, Tom.” It read.

Tears started to flood your eyes.

He finally left.

A wave of desperation and contentment washed over you. He could finally grow and thrive without something to stop him, but you would never get to feel his lips on yours anymore, or the way he’d hold you when you were afraid.

He’s gone.

do yall like fluffy shit or ??? angst seems to be the only thing I write so I want to expand my kind of “genre...” requests are open

Dear do you write for male readers?

I’d gladly try and I’m sure I could 🖤

i don’t even know you anymore

warnings: angst (my personal favourite), yelling, cursing, fluff at the end, breakup, heartbreak, the casual angst, mentions of depression

a/n: might turn into a series (?)

masterlist

You haven’t received a single call or text for the past month. You were sad and worried, yet mad that he didn’t care to answer you. After he started filming Spider-Man: Far From Home and Avengers: Endgame, he slowly cut off all ties with you, except for your relationship. You weren’t even entirely sure if you guys were still a couple.

You were about to close your phone when you receive a call. The caller ID was Tom. You were in shock, but you were ecstatic that he called you, not the other way around. You contemplated if you would answer the call, or ignore him like he did you. You decided to answer because who knows, this could be a one chance opportunity.

“Hello? Tommy, baby?” You spoke into the receiver. A small static plays over the speaker.

“Tom? Are you there?” You were getting worried, until you heard the voice you’ve been longing to hear, “Hey, baby. You look so sexy right now. Can I get a piece of that?” You were confused, “What are you talking about? You can see me?” Then, the realization hit you, “Are you drunk? Is Haz with you? Who are you talking to?”

“Geez, calm down, baby. So many tresdrens, q-questions,” Tom hiccups.

“I’m not cheating on you. Don’t worry, just miss you.” You can hear the faint sound of a woman’s giggle in the background.

“Why are you calling me now? After I’ve been calling and texting you every day, you call me back when you’re drunk?” You sigh in agony. Tom only called because he was drunk. Of course.

“Also, I’ll be back home tomorrow, so see ya!” His cheery voice rings.

“Yeah, okay.” You hung up on him. He was finally coming back, but you didn’t know how to face him. You just needed a break from him. You couldn’t keep following after him, just to be pushed away. You’d be better off alone.

The next day, the door of the flat slowly creaked open, revealing a smiling Tom. His smile made your heart melt and shatter.

“Hey, Tom.” You said quietly.

“Hey, darling! I’m so glad to be back. I’m sorry I couldn’t come back earlier. Haz was being an arse and he didn’t tell Anthony or Joe that I wanted to come back home and see my angel. That div. I have to do everything by myself.” He embraces you tightly, pushing your head into his chest. You have to push him back to breathe. His hard muscles bulging out of his tight, white shirt.

“T-Tom?” You stuttered, afraid to break off your relationship.

“Hm?” He tilts his head to the side, giving you puppy dog eyes.

Just as you were about to tell him about the break, his phone started ringing. “Oh, sorry, love. I gotta take this.” He walks into the kitchen, leaving you with more time to think this through.

“I’m so sorry, love. The cast wants to go out to party while we have this break. I promise I’ll make it up to you.” Tom tries to wrap his muscular arms around you, but you step back, “Don’t.” He looks at you with confusion flooding his features, “You don’t need to make anything up to me. I think we, or whatever this is, should take a break.” You take a step back, trying to avoid his desperate grabs, “What? Darling, whatever is happening, we can fix. I promise. I love you. Please don’t do this.” He begs.

“I didn’t do this, you did. I’ve been calling and texting you for weeks, yet you never answer. The only time you call me is when you’re drunk! Then, you come back and expect everything to be fine. Here’s the thing, Tom, it’s not!” You throw your arms in the air in frustration, “You’re always leaving me behind. I’m never the main priority, always the last. How do you think I feel, huh? I feel like I don’t even know you anymore!”

Tom’s eyes aren’t focused on you anymore. Small sniffles can be heard, followed by whimpers.

“I-I’m sorry. I didn’t realize that I was doing all that. I thought you’d understand. With all my work, I just - I didn’t think you’d make such a big deal out of it. You know how strict working for Marvel can be.” He explains. His words were only excuses.

“You can pack your bags and leave, or I will.” You say sternly, looking into his chocolate brown eyes. With that, he walks into the room, his eyes drooping from the tears gathering in his eyes.

✧ ✧ ✧

It’s been a couple of months since you’ve seen Tom, in person of course. His career skyrocketed after you guys broke up. It was still painful for you to see his adorable face.

Tom never called, nor did he even beg to stay, he just left. His last words to you before he left the flat were, “I love you, darling. I hope you know that. I’m sorry I was oblivious to how you would feel. Just know, if you need anybody, you have my number.” With a kiss lightly placed to your forehead, he left.

The door was gently pulled into its stop. You dropped to your knees and started to sob. Loud cries and yelps were the only things that could be heard from your flat.

You had pushed away the one you loved.

That night, you fell asleep on the cold, hard, wooden floor of your once shared flat. Your life, from that point, became a mess. You stayed home all day long, binge-watched every movie you could (that Tom wasn’t in), and ate. Nobody could make you feel better. You became depressed.

Over the upcoming months, you got better and moved on. You learned to support Tom, even after the way he treated you. Occasionally, you would comment on his posts, “Good job, Tom! I’m so proud of how great you’ve become!” Or, “We should hang out sometime, I want to be friends again!” You’d always be nice with your comments. Whenever you saw hate on his account, you would always tell those haters to respect him and let him be.

The sun started to rise, the morning light shining through your silk curtains. You had gotten up early to go out for a morning jog. You jogged through your favourite park in London ━ it was the one you and Tom always went for a picnic date. You admired the greenery and flowers around you, causing you to accidentally bump into someone in front of you.

“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry.” You apologized, turning to look at the person ahead of you. Your eyes met those beautiful, deep, brown eyes.

“T-Tom?” You stepped back, confused, yet afraid of the figure in front of you.

It couldn’t be him. No, it can’t. No, no, no. Don’t backtrack Y/N. I’m over it. I’m over him.

“Hey, Y/N! How are you?” Tom’s smile still took your breath away.

“Great! How about you?” You lied. You were doing terrible. You just couldn’t believe that he was in front of you, after all these years.

“I’m doing amazing!”

You felt something soft and furry brush your leg. You looked down to see the beloved dog of his, Tessa. You haven’t seen her in such a long time. She still looked like an adorable pup.

“Hey, girl! How are you doing? Oh, you’re adorable! Aren’t you a cutie?” You started petting Tessa while she licked your face.

“Um, Y/N?” Tom scratched the back of his neck, “Would you like to go out to brunch with me? You don’t have to, I was just wondering. Don’t feel pressured to go if you don’t want to, though. You can always just reject me. As long as you’re comfortable,” He rambled nervously.

“Of course, Tom. I’d gladly go out to brunch with you,” You giggled. This made his face light up. His smile doubled and his eyes sparkled. He loves the sound of your laughs.

“Oh, really?! Yes! I mean, yeah, that’s great, amazing, fantastic,” He looked away, trying to avoid eye contact with you. Your finger is placed under his chin, moving his face to look at you. A smile is plastered across your face.

You guys walked together, with Tessa of course, and went out to brunch at the modern café in the park. It was your favourite café in London. You ordered avocado toast with a fried egg on top, and Tom ordered french toast with a cup of coffee. You sat on the patio of the café, enjoying the fresh breeze of the morning. You and Tom ate while making small talk.

“Y/N, darling,” Your heart fluttered at the pet name he used to always call you, “I know I left you, and I know I should’ve valued you while I had you, but I still love you, and I can’t stop. I’m not sure if you’ve gotten over me, but I promise, I still love you, so please, please, take me back. I’m sorry for how I treated you, but I’ve changed for the better. Please take me back. I still love you.” Tom held your hands gently.

You were shocked, speechless, even. You didn’t know how to reply. You still loved him, but he broke your heart. You didn’t know if he’d break it again. It took you such a long time to get better, would it be worth it to risk it all, again? He loves you, though. He told you that when he left, and months later, he’s telling you again, but he could be lying.

“How do I know you’re not lying?” You finally spoke.

Tom looked you in the eye, leaned forward, and passionately placed his lips on yours. It was sweet and soft, yet passionate and needy. You knew it was wrong, but you didn’t care. You love him and he loves you. You had to take him back. He was like your drug.

“Tom,” You sighed his name as you slowly, and painfully, pulled away, “I’ll take you back,” The corners of his lips raised, “But on one condition.” You told him.

“I’ll do anything, darling,” He begged.

“If you are bored with me, or whatever it is, don’t let me find out and break my heart, but tell me beforehand. You don’t understand how long and hard it was for me to get over you. It hurt,” You started tearing up at the memories. One of the tears were able to escape your eyes, and Tom used his finger to wipe it away, “I’m sorry, darling. I really am. I love you, and I’ll never do it again. Please don’t cry.” You looked down at the marble table, wiping your tears away with your hoodie.

Tom lifted your head with this finger and pulled you in for another kiss.

“I love you,” He said between the kiss.

“I love you, too,” You replied.

hi! i just came across your masterlist and i just wanted to say that your writing is absolutely amazing! i love moonlight part 1, the way you write dynamics are the best. anywho, youre the best! have a good day ❤️

I- uwu omg thank you so much ! that means a lot to me 🖤 I didn’t think my writing was that great 🥺 omg I love you

masterlist

Y/N pouting because Tom stole her jar of cookies: you suck

Tom: you swallow... and choke

Y/N literally chokes (on her spit):

Tom winks at her: