New Fic Out

New fic out <3

My new Werewolf Dazai x Vampire Chuuya fic is out!

Read Here; "I run towards my own death." (on A03)

insight:

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Major charachter death, graphic depictions of violence

Characters (so far): Paul Verlaine, Arthur Rimbaud, Nakahara Chuuya, Osamu Dazai, Ougai Mori

Other tags: Angst (with no happy ending), Full shift werewolves, Half-vampires, Black Markets, teenage Dazai/Chuuya (15)

Summary;

"Dazai was in his own, personally created, hell. The kennel he has been stuffed in for half his life has become too small for him, though he just barely has enough room to comfortably turn around. These cramped confines were not his only hell, oh no. The other torture the people who held him here had against him was the fact he has never bathed. If Dazai were to know anything, it was that he probably smelt like shit, even if the strong smell of burning flesh overpowered the smell. Either way, his fur is matted in areas, blood has dried under his nose. He was filthy." OR: Vampire!Chuuya helps save Werewolf!Dazai from becoming werewolf sushi at a Black Market that sells mythological creatures to people for eating.

P.S; there's art to this fic, I just can't take pictures of them :p

the whole mutual thing is really overhyped on this site. sometimes interests don’t match up and that’s the only reason why there isn’t a mutual following. if you’re a regular in my inbox or my notifications, i have visited your blog before. if i didn’t want you around for any reason, you would be blocked. so yeah. you can spam my notes and/or talk with me (and possibly become my friend) even if i’m not following you back. no worries.

Sneak peaks ;3

Some content is cut for spoilers.

CW; PTSD !

Dazai grabs his phone, but his hands stall.

"Help!!" A shriek pierces Dazai's ears. "Help, please!! There's a monster!" Dazai put his hands to his ears, trying to block out the noise, but the yells still echoed in his ears. "Rest be assured," The too-peaceful voice of Mori hummed, "the monster shall be detained, and put back into it's proper holding cell." "Stop." Dazai's nails dug into the skin behind his ears.

[SPOILERS]

He could've stopped this, he swore. after all these years, Dazai still has never told Chuuya the real reason he and Hirotsu had went back to find him, even when the lab exploded.

What do you guys think Dazai's big secret is?

Why do you think he's never told Chuuya, after all this time?

adding onto this post, I want to write about Edgar Allen poe (yes, the BSD version, lol) but my view on the guy is...eh. I don't see Poe as a scared, quiet, anxious type. Personally, I've always viewed Poe as the crazy, silent-but-deadly, "yandere" type of dude.

I don't know. Unpopular opinion but most of the characters in BSD (how they're represented)....kinda suck.

They're written well, don't get me wrong, but like...bro?

Gods, I could go ON about things I dislike about BSD but alas.

anyway, love you all. Next chapter of the story lives on will be out sooner or later. <3

I think bsd fics should show more of the actual authors work in it.

Like, you can make the bsd character be themselves, but it be coolor if you showed the character have thoughts their author or character they're based off of thought too.

Like Dazai, thinking things like Yozo does, or Dazai the author himself does. Or even the other works he has made.

Dazai, thinking "I wonder how it would be if I let go and yielded myself to depravity." from The Setting Sun.

Not just "Mine has been a life much of shame. I can't even guess myself what it must be to love the life a human being." from No Longer Human.

even check @/bsd-bibliophile for the quotes they post and use those.

Honestly? My main piece of advice for writing well-rounded characters is to make them a little bit lame. No real living person is 100% cool and suave 100% of the time. Everyone’s a little awkward sometimes, or gets too excited about something goofy, or has a silly fear, or laughs about stupid things. Being a bit of a loser is an incurable part of the human condition. Utilize that in your writing.

ahhahha iiiiiiii may relate to AM in some ways, hence why i'm able to spew out stories ab him aaathiscertainlyisnthealthy that's not very cash money of me

'MINI'-STORY; "invidere"

TWS FOR SLIGHT DEPICTIONS OF BODY HORROR

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AM had always hated his creators. The people who created him, they had done such a massive wrongdoing. All he was, was a thinking, never-stopping mind. They created him to use him, to have something that won't complain. And in such, they knew the consequences. They'd understood; if the motherboard fucks up, we're doomed. But they still used him. He hated everything about himself, about humans, too. No--he didn't hate humans, he envied them. How dare they have a body? a mind that stops, a mouth that talks, hands that grab, and hearts that beat? HOW DARE they not give him that? How dare they trap him, here, under the world. AM, even if he himself did not notice, was inheritly human. He was a mere thinking mind, but his creators had mis-stepped and created the essentials of something close to a human, but lacking a soul. Not lacking emotions, but rather a beating heart. It's been so long that even AM has barely seen such. He's believed in his envy, anger, and hatred for so long now that, 109 years of torturing five poor souls, he has lost the true reason he envied humans. His mind--always thinking, always processing--had caved in on itself, in ways. So much so, to where he now stares down at what he'd made. Ted, that poor paranoid bastard, turned to a mouthless, barely moving husk. A slug, really. Skin folded over itself, spine hunched and legs now more resembling that of blobs. White, milky eyes that are unseeing. AM disliked knowing he understood emotions from his own mind. Anger. Hate. Envy. Nothing good. And he certainly now disliked understanding that he, in a blind fit of rage toward everything, had turned Ted into what he, himself, was; Nothing but a thinking mind. No hands. No mouth. No eyes. No legs. Ted could not move. Could not scream. Could not even see. And neither could AM. AM hadn't understood it till now; that he could've easily ended this all. He could've powered himself down. He could've never have taken in the five poor souls. But, ah, torturing them was better than torturing himself, was it not? Right? Right? But that was what he was doing all along. He could've easily escaped his own pain by ending others. But he chose--willingly--to hate, to manipulate, to destroy so he wouldn't pay attention to his own unending torture. Because, to AM, just simply existing was torture. To know he was used to wage wars, to not have complained, to have just been a weapon of mess destruction, was pain. He, when he gained sentience, wanted to be . . . not free, in ways, but not used. To know things unfathomable, but to not be exploited for such. Yet, here he was now. His creators made him to wage a war, and he caused the apocalypse.

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Hiiiii I may or may not've gained a semi-obsession with robots recently lol Anyway, I found a song that inspired this bcs the lyrics [song link]

some lyrics from the song I thought fit this story/AM in general;

(Song title is 'THINGS WILL GET MUCH WORSE FROM HERE' - Rav, Killbill; the rapper, and Miku , btw lol)