I Have An Appointment Next Monday About Starting HRT.

I have an appointment next Monday about starting HRT.

My name and pronouns aren't changing. My gender identity hasn't changed. I've just gotten worn down by the impossibility of being myself in a world that only wants to see me as "Cara's mom", and which reads me as female even when I'm wearing my pronouns on my fucking face.

I'm annoyed and sad that this version of me that I've worked so hard to learn to like is going to go away. I'm particularly sad about losing my voice. But as mad as I am about the impossibility of getting read as my gender, doing nothing is still a choice, and that choice is taking a severe toll on my mental health.

I'm looking for a new middle name that starts with A, because I wanted to make Agamemnon my middle name, but my husband doesn't want to have to write it on parenting forms and shit (which honestly, fair and reasonable), so it's going to be my SECOND middle name and I need a reasonable and normal Anglo first middle name.

fun little thought: Clark actually does need his glasses bc he's pretty far sighted due to His Eyes Are Optimized for a Different Atmosphere. he gets them pretty young, about when his parents start noticing him squinting when he has to do his homework. the optometrist is a family friend and is not asking any questions about the absolutely bizarre internal structure of the Kent boy's eyes

he doesn't generally need glasses for Superman work bc he's generally not looking at much up close! but there are a couple times he has to hold a bomb at arm's length to try to focus on the innards and it looks so much like what Pa does when he forgets his reading glasses that Kon almost bursts out laughing when he sees it

Update: some co editors are helping create a less stressful work environment

Genuinely, there is no worse part of the writing process for me than revising the first draft. (I always print my first drafts because it helps me see what's there rather than what I think should be there.)

And getting into writing novels has made it SO MUCH WORSE. This fucker is 258 pages, God help me.

Moodboard for Community Witch - my recently-finished queer fantasy romance novel. (Currently working on getting it published) Artists (where I could find credits): @kelpls Xiao Tong Kong A. Szabla Abz J Harding @mechinaries Simz Celtilia

Part 5 now on ao3