Having Fun With Ace Representation

Having fun with ace representation

Comments I have made to my editor while talking about one of the main characters in my queer poly triad fantasy romance who is ace, pan, and demi. "Hence why he's such a wholesome dumbass"

"I was being intentionally vague on whether Rav was demiromantic, demisexual, or both. For people like me who are so asexual that I've literally only ever been attracted to. Like. Less than twenty people, it's a meaningless distinction." "I literally forget that people experience attraction all the time" "Me, routinely: why do people do X? My friends: you forgot sexual attraction exists again, didn't you? Me: oh. Yeah. I did." "Honestly trying to provide ace representation is infuriating as an ace myself because. Look. I love me a label, okay? I collect them. I'm a connoisseur. But the aces went too far." "I would die for all of them, but Rav in particular. He is my wholesome asexual son."

Because my ADHD coping strategy in school was highlighting my notes in rainbow colors, I'm currently going through the MS with editor's notes, highlighting for different types of revisions and making notes. AND IT'S THE FUCKING WORST I'm trying to power through it because this is the stage where I've crashed out on other projects but I'm like. Six hours in? Seven? Maybe eight? And making decisions about how to change things is infinitely worse than actually doing the rewrites. Two thirds of the way done and I plan on rewarding myself by taking a break to rewrite a sex scene.

Honestly this is my favorite kind of fantasy now

No more apocalypses and saving the world

More arguing with dragons about cheese

Picture this: Dragons using their caves to age cheese. Dragon Cheesemakers!!

The dragon coiled his enormous body, completely blocking the entrance of the tunnel that lead to the caves.

“No,” he snarled, smoke pluming from his nose.

The cheesemonger pinched the bridge of her own nose. “Look, I explained this to you at the start,” she tried once more. “I make cheese.”

“Yes,” the agreed, nodding his scaly head.

“Then I bring the cheese here.”

“Yes.”

“Then you store all the cheese in your cave, keeping it at the perfect temperature and humidity.”

“Yes.” He sounded particularly proud of this part.

“And then when the cheese has ripened,” she concluded. “I come to pick the cheese up again.”

A thunderous scowl clouded his maw. “No.”

“But that’s how it works!” she cried in exasperation. “I make the cheese, you store the cheese, I sell the cheese, I make more cheese!” She peered up at him. “You do realise I cannot bring you new cheese until I have sold this cheese.”

The dragon considered this for a moment. “Ah, but what if—” he began. “What if you go and make more cheese. And bring me the cheese. And I put it in my cave, with the rest of the hoard. And then I keep it there forever.”

“No,” she said flatly.

It was remarkable how much a dragon could look like it had just swallowed a lemon.

“You can’t keep cheese forever,” she insisted. “It will spoil and go bad!”

“You said it would get better and better!” the dragon roared indignantly. “And I take good care of them! With the air flow and the humidity and the temperature!”

“And that is great,” she said, trying to smile through her frustration. “But when a cheese is ripe, it’s ripe! Then you should not be kept anymore, it should be eaten.”

The dragon scraped it’s formidable claws against the stony ground and sulked.

“Look…” The cheese mongering business did not tend to require a lot of sweet-talking, but she was making an effort. “I’m sure the cheeses that aged in your cave are the best cheeses people have ever tasted. When they find out how delicious they are they will want us to make loads more. Maybe several caves’ worth!”

The reptilian eyes stared at her with disgruntled, reluctant interest. “Several caves?”

“If we’re lucky! And I could make so much cheese that I could bring you new cheese as soon as I pick up the aged cheese. Your cave would never even be empty!”

This seemed to strike a chord. The dragon lifted his head a little.

“And that would really be much better for the rest of your hoard,” she continued with fresh inspiration. “Because if you leave cheese too long, it might go bad and spoil the cheeses next to it too!”

A nervous ripple went through the beast’s scaly body, but he clearly was not convinced just yet. “But what sort of a hoard is it if I have to give it away,” he complained.

“Well! Cheese is not just any old hoard! It’s a developing creation! And you will have a hoard that is constantly developing too. Constantly changing, but, if we do this right, never shrinking.”

The dragon looked at her solemnly, wavering with uncertainty. Perhaps she shouldn’t hold it against the poor thing, it must be a difficult concept to wrap his head around.

“And I will tell you what,” she said encouragingly. “If business is good, I can start investing in some really good crumbly cheeses. You can keep those in your cave for five whole years!”

“That is quite a long time for humans, is it not?” he said, sounding a little more cheerful.

“Very long. Especially when it comes to cheese. Cheeses that have been aged that long are very expensive.”

In retrospect, she should perhaps have led with that. Gourmand or not, a dragon was still a dragon after all. A glittering, toothy grin appeared on her recalcitrant business partner’s shout and he moved just enough for her to move past him into the mountain.

“Tell me more about this expensive cheese that crumbles.”

She hid a smirk. “If you help me carry some of the current ones out, it would be my pleasure.”

People get so fucking weird about ace people not "really" being queer. Like as a Formerly Internet Famous person I get lied about a fair amount, and a lot of it is like. People who don't think I'm actually queer? The latest example of this describes me as an AVOWED ASEXUAL. And. Like. Really???? Avowed????? Asexual??????? You're really that bothered by me just... not experiencing sexual attraction? Also, I'm an avowed LOTS OF THINGS and ASEXUAL is what you're going with?????