Jin Zixuan: So You See Xue Yang And Yu-didi Walking Across The Road. What Do You Hit?

Jin Zixuan: So you see Xue Yang and Yu-didi walking across the road. What do you hit?

Su She: The closest convenience store.

Jin Zixuan: What, no-

Su She: No because it's perfect. They always have their ski masks on them. *grabs keys* Xue Yang! Mo Xuanyu! Let's go rob a bank!

The gremlin twins: YAAAY!

Jin Zixuan: WAIT! STOP!

*Meng Yao in the background dying of laughter.*

._._._.

Xue Yang: What's your greatest fear?

Su She: Being tricked by the enemy into slaughtering everyone I love.

Xue Yang: Less dramatic.

Su She: Oh, then crushing my boyfriend's neck while he's going down on me. If we're gonna do it, he has to either go sideways or 69 with me while my hands are tied behind my back.

Xue Yang: Kinky.

Su She: No. No. CONCERNED.

Me and my bestie are the same Like a synonym

A human sieve 🕳️

For the 21st day of #MXTXtober23: curse.

I kind of wanted to create something to work as a set with the previous one. Enjoy! Or cover your eyes if you don’t like tiny holes. 🫣

have more of my ghost! wwx xianyao au

Xianyao (Wei Wuxian x Meng Yao) Modern AU Part 2

I haven’t done this in a long while, so let’s do it!

OTP Spring Questions! (via https://otp-imagines-cult.tumblr.com/)

1: Does anyone in your OTP/OT3 have seasonal allergies that kick up in the spring? How does the other member(s) help?

- I can’t imagine either of them having seasonal allergies, but if one did inhale too much pollen, I imagine the other would care for them as one would with a cold.

2: Where does your OTP like to go walking when the weather is warm?

-   A hiking park. The sceneries are beautiful, you’re not crowded by a lot of people, and there’s usually a good amount of breeze so it’s not sweltering.

3: How would your OTP handle it if one of them became a bee?

- Wei Wuxian would build a bee home for him with all these cool gadgets to impress Meng-Bee. Meng Yao would take the simpler route and buy a bee home for him with all the necessary items to keep him alive. They would both try to figure out how to bring the other back to normal, and if it requires going out, they will call for Yanli to help ba-bee-sit their lover.

4: Does your OTP plant flowers/tend to gardens?

- They will definitely have a lotus pond in their backyard, and a vegetable/fruit garden that Wei Wuxian tends to the most since Meng Yao has a 9-5 job, but he helps around during his day offs and listens to Wei Wuxian talk about his masterpieces passionately. They’re not big on a pretty flower garden, and their indoor plants are basic useful low maintenance ones like a snake plant. 

5: Does your OTP like the beauty and new life of spring, or the cold winter?

- Wei Wuxian prefers the Summer and Meng Yao prefers Autumn, but if you had them decide which one, they would pick the spring since they’re tropical people. They would rather deal with rain than snow. 

6: Does your OTP celebrate any holidays during the spring? How?

- They’re Chinese, and they do have a Spring Festival, though it’s more of a New Years festival that takes place late Winter. During Spring, they will definitely celebrate the Qingming Festival to pray for their parents if they’re dead in the AU. For Labor Day, depending on what jobs they have, they will stay in and become couch potatoes binging on television shows, since they’re such busy people. For the Dragon boat Festival, Wei Wuxian would definitely be participating in it, and Meng Yao would support him from the sidelines. 

-Meng Yao is also a Buddhist (of sorts), so he will be also celebrating their holidays in his own way and Wei Wuxian will be supportive.

7: What sorts of spring sports does either member of your OTP participate in?

- They’re both athletic, and swimming is the number one sport they both participate as river people. Along with water polo, rowing, fencing and volleyball.

- Separately, Meng Yao would invest in badminton and Wei Wuxian would get into lacrosse. 

8: Does the other member cheer their lover on?

- Absolutely! Meng Yao would bring out his Yunmeng dialect into that audience during his boyfriend’s lacrosse games, terrifying the shit out of those near him! Wei Wuxian would cheer him on while remaining on his best behavior, but if he hears someone speak bad about his boyfriend, he might get into a fight and get kicked out. Not without slaughtering the asshole’s ego though. 

9: If your OTP watches anime, what shows would they be looking forward to this spring season?

- They’re both Attack on Titans fans. Meng Yao’s favorite character is Erwin and cried when he died. Wei Wuxian’s favorite is Sasha and became distraught when she died. 

- A new anime that they would get into is Mashle because it kind of resonates with them, but they also love anime comedies.

10: How would your OTP react if it started to snow during spring?

- They’d investigate the cause first. Afterwards, they would go out to examine and play with the snow to experience the rare event. They’d probably travel to one of their sibling’s or friend’s place to share the moment.

11: Which member of your OTP accidentally wears an outfit too warm for the weather? Which member of your OTP accidentally wears an outfit not warm enough for the weather?

- Meng Yao for the former and Wei Wuxian for the latter.

12: What kind of flowers does your OTP give to each other?

- Meng Yao’s favorite flowers are chrysanthemums, and Wei Wuxian is careful to choose the right color. As for Wei Wuxian, lotus flowers aren’t good for a bouquet, so instead Meng Yao gifts him gladioli flowers which stand as a symbolism of one’s moral and loyal character and remembrance.

13: Which member of your OTP freaks out when they hear an ice cream truck pass by?

- Wei Wuxian a 100%! He would even go the extra step to rush to Meng Yao and convince him like a child to follow him to the ice cream truck.

14: Does your OTP care about how green their lawn is? Do they even have a lawn?

- Meng Yao cares about how green his lawn is since he cares about outside appearance, so he hires someone to take care of the front lawn.

15: If your OTP starts school in spring, where do they go to get supplies? Do they end up sharing any classes?

- Meng Yao would definitely shop around to any store for the best prices for the best quality, and would contact the professors beforehand so he has a list. Wei Wuxian would just get his from your typical store, or gives a list to Meng Yao since Meng Yao would go out of his way anyway to make sure he was ready for school as much as he was. And Wei Wuxian would thank him with other preparations for the semester. 

- And no to the classes because Wuxian would be working to get his degree in science to become a pharmaceutical scientist, and Meng Yao would be studying to get a degree in business administration.

16: Who would surprise the other with flowers?

- Meng Yao definitely has that flower theme going because of his family, but I don’t see them as the type of couple to give each other flowers as surprise gifts. Their surprise romantic gifts would be a cup of coffee. 

17: Who’s more likely to make a flower crown for the other?

- Wei Wuxian.

18: Does your OTP prefer to go outside during the spring, or do they prefer staying inside and cuddling up on a couch?

-Definitely going outside. They cuddled enough during the Winter/Raining Season, they need to go out and jog.

19: What sorts of wildlife would your OTP like to see? What kind of wildlife would they not like to see?

- They’d like to see insect wildlife since they’re the most diverse and interesting type of wildlife. They wouldn’t want to see mountain wildlife, especially on a hiking trip.

21: Which one would surprise the other by taking them to the beach before the summer crowd comes?

- Meng Yao would surprise Wei Wuxian with this, especially after a long stressful project. It would be right before sunrise. It’s cold, so they’re covered in winter jackets and pants, playing with sparklers, or those fun light up toys. They’d then have their breakfast inside the open trunk of their car while watching the sun rise, listening to alternative indie music in the background. After the sun is fully up, they do different things like building sandcastles, draw elaborate sketches in the sand, take a swim once its warm enough and more.

22: Which one’s hat would blow away in the wind and which one would go after the hat and bring it back?

- Wei Wuxian a 100%. He’d be doing parkour to get that hat! 

I think often about Jin Guangyao’s “[I murdered] my father, my (older) brother, my wife, my son, my teacher, my friend” quote. I think about how Jin Guangyao, a man known for self effacing politeness to the point of taking blame and shame onto himself to alleviate the tempers of others, in this moment takes complete responsibility for “murders” that he absolutely did not commit. And I think about how the audience both in the story and outside it, take his words at face value.  

I think there are multiple ways of interpreting who this quote is about. Obviously Father = Jin Guangshan, Wife = Qin Su, Son = Jin Rusong, those are clear. I think (older) Brother could either be Nie Mingjue or Jin Zixuan. I think "teacher” could be Wen Rouhan or Nie Mingjue. Friend could be Nie Mingjue, Su Minshan, or Xue Yang.

So I think the ONLY options for [brother, teacher, friend] (in that order) are: 

NMJ, WRH, and SMS

NMJ, WRH, and XY

JZX, NMJ, and SMS

JZX, NMJ, and XY

JZX, WRH, and NMJ

JZX, WRH, and SMS

JZX, WRH, and XY

I also saw a translation where he said “friends” plural, which would reduce the list to:

NMJ, WRH, XY and SMS

JZX, NMJ, XY and SMS

JZX, WRH, SMS and NMJ

JZX, WRH, XY and NMJ

JZX, WRH, XY and SMS

However, given the importance of his relationship with NMJ, I feel like we can safely eliminate any that exclude NMJ entirely. Similarly, there cannot be characters mentioned here who are unnamed or unknown to the reader, as that wouldn’t make any Doylist sense. We are left with a list that consists of Nie Mingjue, either WRH or JZX or both, and possibly XY and/or SMS. 

Regardless of which of those combinations you use, he did not directly OR EVEN DELIBERATELY murder everyone on that list. Let’s go through them:

Jin Guangshan: Yes, he deliberately ordered and orchestrated his father’s death. Outstanding, earned, poetic, no notes. (Okay maybe SOME notes, but like, listen. Listen.) 

Qin Su: Qin Su killed herself. In the animation, Jin Guangyao used the skull-piercing nails to force her suicide, but this is not canon to the novel. Bicao claims that Jin Guangyao must have killed her to silence her, despite her suicide having many witnesses (including us! the readers!), but Wei Wuxian (who WAS THERE) speculates that she couldn’t handle the reality of her marriage, as illuminated to her BY Bicao, or the prospect of societal shame if it got out. However, even IF “your actions drove her to suicide” were the rubric here, that’s still not quite the same as “you murdered her”, nor does it seem to be the outcome he was hoping or planning for. “JGY murdered her” is factually inaccurate, and a blatant propaganda tactic being used against him– but perhaps it felt emotionally true to HIM because he’s grieving his DEAD WIFE and he FEELS responsible.

Nie Mingjue: JGY spent something like 5+ years suffering physical and verbal abuse and explicit threats of death by Nie Mingjue, then was tasked with killing Nie Mingjue by his father. He did so in a sneaky way, so as to not endanger himself further or get punished for (or perhaps cause an inter-sect conflict/war by) killing the leader of a rival sect.

Wen Rouhan: JGY stabbed him in all adaptations, A+, war hero.

Jin Zixuan: JGY, on his father’s orders, orchestrated a situation that led to Jin Zixuan’s death. We cannot know for SURE that JGY wasn’t aiming for his death but we CAN say that “Wei Wuxian accidentally compelling Wen Ning to kill the ONE GUY PRESENT Wei Wuxian did NOT want to kill” (OR “WN killing JZX of his own accord against WWX’s orders”) would have been a weird bet to make. This seems highly unlikely to have been JGY’s goal, but it was certainly caused by a situation he created. He also did not actually literally kill the guy.

Su Minshan: Su She died to protect Jin Guangyao from Nie Mingjue’s fierce corpse. Jin Guangyao is only “responsible” for this in the vaguest or terms and worst faith of interpretations. Technically Su She wouldn’t have died there if not for JGY on multiple levels (wouldn’t have had to protect him, NMJ’s fierce corpse being JGY’s fault, wouldn’t have been present at all if JGY hadn’t summoned him there, etc.), but if Jin Guangyao describes this as “I murdered him” that’s… a stretch. Again, like with Qin Su, this feels like something he might say because he FEELS responsible, rather than because he actually is.

Xue Yang: JGY ordered Xue Yang’s execution (or possibly ordered a fake execution, but this seems less likely) directly before he fled, injured, to Yi City. He did not die here. Later, after reconnecting and while still following Jin Guangyao’s orders, Xue Yang was killed by other people in opposition to Jin Guangyao’s wishes and plans. Again, TECHNICALLY Xue Yang would not have died when he did were it not for Jin Guangyao, but describing it as “Jin Guangyao murdered him” is QUITE a stretch. Due to the title of the “Villainous Friends” extra, which is about JGY and XY specifically, XY seems the most likely candidate to me for “Friend” in this quote, which is bizarre because I think his death is actually the LEAST connected to Jin Guangyao. Jin Guangyao wasn’t even present, nor did Xue Yang die FOR Jin Guangyao– just on his payroll. BUT perhaps he still felt guilty for ORDERING his execution, and simply his willingness to HAVE Xue Yang killed counted enough to make the list.

I’ll get to the last one, but I’m pausing here to say: What all of this means is that no matter who is or isn’t on that list, it is NOT an objective list of factual murders. It is a list of people who’s deaths Jin Guangyao FEELS RESPONSIBLE FOR.

Even before we get to who counts as teacher, brother, or friend, even JUST his wife solidifies this. But it isn’t JUST her either– even if we cut SMS and XY (the other two BIG stretch candidates) from the equation, that leaves us ONLY with NMJ(friend), WRH(teacher), and JZX(brother). And Jin Zixuan is the other one that really should not make the list of people JGY “murdered”.

This is a list of people who’s deaths Jin Guangyao FEELS RESPONSIBLE FOR.

Which brings us to the last one:

Jin Rusong: The quote (I believe this is a fan translation, but not sure) "One of the opposing sect leaders lost the arguments [about the watchtowers], and went into a murderous rage, killing Jin Guangyao and Qin Su’s only son. The boy had always been a good child and the couple had loved him dearly. Under resentment, Jin Guangyao tore down the entire sect in revenge” is, to my knowledge/memory, the only real account we’re given of what happened. “Lost the arguments and went into a murderous rage” doesn’t sound like the child was found dead some time later, and they had to investigate. It sounds like it happened in public, with witnesses, immediately. 

In the same scene where Bicao convinces and audience that Qin Su, who famously killed herself on screen in a room full of people with a (now) known motive for suicide, “must have” been murdered by Jin Guangyao– in that same scene others speculate that Jin Rusong, who was famously killed by a political opponent in a “murderous rage” most likely DURING A CONFERENCE, “must have” been murdered by Jin Guangyao. 

I think "I angered an opposing sect leader so much that he killed my son” being translated by JGY into “I killed my son” is EXACTLY IN LINE with the rest of his list. How is that different than “I ordered Xue Yang’s assassination, and later put him in a situation that caused others to kill him” being translated to “I killed my friend”? Or “Su Shu died to protect me” being translated to “I killed my friend”? Or “I didn’t anticipate my brother’s unwitting involvement in a covert operation would get him accidentally killed, which no one wanted, not even the guy who did it” being translated to “I killed my brother”? Or “I tried to protect my pregnant fiancé/wife from a horrible secret I only just learned, which would ruin her life, and when someone confronted her with it TO HARM ME she couldn’t live with it and killed herself” being translated to “I killed my wife”? It’s the same!

I do not believe that Jin Guangyao killed Jin Rusong. I believe “I murdered my son” is an example of the way that Jin Guangyao speaks about himself– always taking the maximum responsibility onto his own shoulders. If he was in any way responsible, than he was completely responsible. If he FEELS responsible, then he MAY AS WELL have murdered them.

The context of when he says this quote also matters towards how we interpret it’s meaning. He was already attempting to flee the country, aware that the cultivation world was actively turning on him for crimes that he did AND DIDN’T commit. He was surrounded by people he thought cared about him, all of whom seemed determined to stop him from achieving a safe exit. He had had all the horrible things he felt responsible for (regardless of how directly or deliberately he was involved in those events) thrown in his face by said loved ones, while they looked at him with horror. Su Minshan had just been killed trying to PROTECT HIM, and now it looked like it had been for nothing anyway. Huaisang, who he is shown as doting upon throughout their decades long relationship, has just manipulated Lan Xichen (do I even have to go into how important Lan Xichen is to him? Please say no, please say this much at LEAST is universally understood) into BEING THE ONE to STAB HIM. 

In this moment, he believes that he’s going to die, and be reviled in death by society and his loved ones alike. He knows there’s nothing left he can say or do, he hasn’t had time to process Su She’s death, and Lan Xichen has JUST (accidentally) betrayed him (which he also hasn’t had time to process). 

And also, notably, he had very recently been IN POSSESSION of the TIGER TALLY. 

AND HE’S BEEN STABBED! To my memory this scene happens while he’s missing an arm and LAN XICHEN’S sword is still INSIDE HIS GUTS. His emotions and reasoning are probably NOT the most calm or rational right now (blood loss, pain, fear, grief, influence of the tiger tally, etc.), and this “confession” should be taken with that in mind. 

I just think a lot about how “I murdered [everyone I’ve loved except for you]” is such a raw and telling line, given the context. Even if it’s more like “I murdered [everyone I’ve owed devotion to except for you]”, that’s still so painful. He blames himself for all of it. All of it! The world celebrated Wen Rouhan’s death, but Jin Guangyao added it to his personal list. Jin Guangshan is arguably the most reprehensible character in the entire story, and ruined every part of Jin Guangyao’s entire life, but he’s on the list. He did everything in his power to protect Qin Su, and when she found out the truth he continued offering her ways he could protect her, but she chose to kill herself, and she’s on the list. He tried to improve the world with the watchtowers, and someone retaliated by murdering his son, and he claimed responsibility for that too.

He knew he was being blamed for their deaths, knew it was propaganda and slander and bad faith, but he blamed himself too. So he just… accepted it. I did it. It was me, I murdered them.

And so, so, so many people, in his world and in ours, were so, so eager to agree